All language subtitles for 9-1-1 - 06x12 - Recovery.CAKES.English.C.orig.Addic7ed.com

Bobby?

Bobby, open up.

He ever gone MIA like this before?

No.

Honestly, I-I don't know much
about his story

before he took over the house,
just that he, uh...

- he's in recovery.
- Hey, wait, wait, wait.

Hear that?

Bobby?

Help.

God, grant me the serenity to accept

the things I cannot change...

...the courage to
change the things I can,

and the wisdom to know the difference.

That's it for today.

But remember, whether it's been
24 hours since your last drink,

or 24 years...

we've all found the courage to be here.

And hope to see you again soon.

Nice to see you, brother.

See you next week.

- Hi.
- Hi. Good to see you, too.

You've been here before.

Nope.

I've been there myself.

In that foxhole.

Hiding out in the back row,

the thousand-yard stare.

Guarded. Hiding from undue shame.

I have been on that same battlefield.

But I don't take you
for a fellow Marine.

Maybe a... cop.

Firefighter.

I'm right only a third of the time.

I know those crossed arms
are supposed to be a sign

that you don't want company.

Sorry to tell you, for me,

it's a signal,
that someone needs support.

You might not think so right now.

But you made it a point
to come here today.

Some coworkers brought me in.

You drinking at work?

- It happens.
- Not to me.

I know this isn't your regular meeting,

but do you have a regular
someone to talk to?

I did back in Minnesota,
but not since I moved here.

Mostly I just go to church.

I'm all for talking to the man upstairs.

But sometimes...

you need someone who can talk back.

I've been feeling a little lost.

Then let's help you find your way back.

You think that somebody
did this on purpose?

- Good morning.
- Good morning.

Mm.

Looks like you've been up awhile.

Oh.

Yep. Wendall's son called.

Medical examiner finally got
the toxicology results back.

And the official finding is that
Wendall died of a drug overdose.

And since he didn't die
on the premises of the rehab facility...

They're closing the
investigation into Winding Path?

- Yeah.
- Aww.

It's not like any of this is a surprise.

There's been dozens of
investigations into that place,

nothing ever sticks.

I'm sorry, baby.

Four months of searching
and this is all we've come up with.

It's not all.

I was thinking about that girl
that you and May met,

- at Winding Path.
- Tamara.

Yeah.

Maybe it's time to try
talking to her again.

You did say that May thought she
was making progress with her.

Until the conversation
turned to Wendall.

And then Tamara shut her down
and cut off all communication.

With May.

I'm thinking she might talk to me.

We're both in recovery.
We both knew Wendall.

Could be an opening.

Athena, I need to talk to her.

There might be a way.

Hi. Tamara?

Yeah, uh, do I know you?

I'm May's stepdad.

I think she told you about me?

Ambushing people in flower shops.

Is that the family trait?

I didn't know how else
to get ahold of you.

May said you stopped
returning her calls.

Usually a sign that someone
doesn't want to talk to you.

Okay, listen, I'm sorry for just
showing up here like this,

but Wendall was a really good friend.

And he pulled me out of more
than a few dark places.

I think you knew him, too.

If you knew him like I did,
you know he was a good man.

And he did not deserve to die alone
in an abandoned lot like that.

No matter what was going on with him.

He didn't die there.

What?

He didn't die there.

Okay.

Listen, Tamara, he came to see me

a couple days before he died,
and I could tell something was off,

but I couldn't tell what,
and I didn't push.

Now, Wendall, you know,
he-he would've pushed.

He wouldn't have given up
until I let him in.

I let him in, too.

And then I pulled him down with me.

Pulled him down? What do you mean?

Is this after you met him
at Winding Path?

No. We met before that.

Wendall was never a patient there.

He only checked himself in to help me.

To help all of us.

He knew something was wrong
with that place.

And he was gonna prove it.

Prove it how?

You have to let this go.

Or you'll end up like Wendall.

- Synced and corrected by synk -
- www.addic7ed.com -

Hey, you do remember
that I-I live alone, right?

But you're supposed to be taking it easy

and letting your body heal,
so I thought I would save you

a few trips to the grocery store.

For the next six months?

For however long it takes you
to recover.

Maddie, I'm fine.

Buck. You died.

Okay? And not almost, you actually died.

We don't know the long-term
repercussions of that.

Well, it was only for three minutes.

Come on. If I can't
make a joke about dying,

what's the point in living?

Okay, uh, hey, don't you
have a shift today?

Are you trying to get rid of me?

No, I'm just turning the tables.

You know, I'm starting
to worry about you

because you have a job,
you have a new house,

you have a little girl that
needs taking care of.

You shouldn't be running
over here all the time.

I don't mind.

Well, I can tell that you don't mind,

but I promise you I can take
care of myself, okay?

My fingers are not broken,
I can order my own food.

Although, I will admit that pot
roast does smell pretty good.

It'll be ready in two hours,
you can have it for lunch.

Well, maybe I'll take a nap until then.

Fine, I'm going to work now.

Uh, listen, hey, um... thank you, okay?

I do appreciate what you're doing,

it's just I don't need you
to fuss over me.

I'm just glad that you're
still here to fuss over.

Yeah, me, too.

And then she just ran off.

That girl was so scared.

Yeah, with good reason.

Maybe that's why
they gave her a job there.

Keep tabs on her,
make sure she doesn't talk.

Hmm.

She said Wendall was going to prove

that something was wrong
at Winding Path.

That's why he checked himself in.

I guess he wanted to see for
himself what was going on there.

Yeah, maybe to collect evidence.

What kind of evidence?

Sounds like an undercover sting.

You know, send someone in
posed as a criminal,

to bear witness to
the commission of a crime.

Well, that would be a police operation.

As far as we know, Wendall
wasn't working with the authorities.

Oh, you don't have to be police
to go undercover, Bobby.

Journalists, filmmakers,
even private citizens nowadays.

Right. All you need is a camera.

Here.

A $300 purchase to
an electronics website.

Same week he died.

Okay, even if Wendall installed
the camera, that was months ago.

What do you think the chances
are any recordings still exist?

Not sure. But...

I do know some people who
might be able to tell me.

I'm gonna take this down to the station

and ask the techs.

Hey. Thank you.

I don't know if I ever slowed
down enough to tell you

how much I appreciate
you doing this with me.

You know, Wendall wasn't
your sponsor and...

Look, I know how important
he was to you.

And to this family.

You're not the only one who misses him.

Sorry. Did I wake you?

Uh, it's okay.

Thought I'd swing by
and see how you're doing.

Make sure you're not climbing the walls.

Nope, just-just the stairs.

Something smells good.

Is that pot roast?

It is. Uh, come on in.

You're just in time for lunch.

Your sister makes a good pot roast.

Uh, yeah. It's kind of her go-to meal.

Karen makes it in a Crock-Pot.

We, uh, we never had one
of those growing up.

My father always said it was a fad.

He might've been thinking
of a fondue pot.

Though those do keep coming back.

Every ten years, like clockwork.

I think someone gave me one
of those when I moved in here.

In fact, uh, I think it was you.

Karen and I got four
when we got married.

I'm still trying to
get rid of the last two.

Re-gifting is my love language.

Uh, hey, so did I pass?

The Dr. Wilson follow-up exam.

Or do you need to check my pulse
while you're here?

Oh, you know what? I should.

Okay. Uh, ow. What was that for?

Ungratefulness.

So what'd your cardiologist
say that's gotten you so cranky?

Um, nothing.

No, she just keeps on ordering
tests and doing scans.

I had to wear this Holter
monitor device for two days.

And I couldn't use my cell phone
or microwave.

But I just keep on waiting
for her to tell me I'm okay.

Or that I'm not okay.

Just something.
Instead, it's just more tests.

You think it's gonna be bad news?

That's the thing. I-I don't know.

I mean, I really do, uh, I feel fine.

But?

But I also felt pretty good

right before I got struck by lightning.

You're mistaking a mistake, Bobby.

You're the one who told me
to get back out there again.

I thought you'd be happy.

I actually thought you'd try to
take credit for the whole thing.

I told you to get out and date,
maybe some nice dinners,

a couple of movies,

maybe some sexy fun times
between the sheets.

Don't worry, all that's
definitely happening.

I wanted you to rejoin
the world and live.

But asking this woman to marry you?

You haven't even been together a year.
That's impulsive.

And acting impulsively is
dangerous for people like us.

But you need to meet her,
it's how she makes me feel.

Like you're flying high?

Like I'm standing on solid ground.

After years of having...

nothing to hold on to,

no way to keep myself
from spinning out of control,

I found her and...

...with that, maybe a piece
of myself again.

Just do us both a favor
and slow down a little.

At least promise
it'll be a long engagement.

So no luck tracking down the purchase?

Not yet.

I've been trying to get ahold
of whoever runs the website,

but it's a phone tree labyrinth.

The tech guys did mention
something interesting, though.

When Wendall's body was found,
he didn't have a camera on him.

Yeah, the fire...

They say there
should have been something.

Melted plastic. A piece of circuitry.

Which means maybe it wasn't
a camera that you wear.

It could've been a camera
that you leave behind.

You think a camera
could still be at Winding Path?

Maybe. If it's small enough,

or something that could
be disguised as something else,

they might not even know it was there.

Uh, listen, I got to go.

I'll call you as soon as I know more.

- Love you.
- Love you, too.

Connor.

Hey, uh... did my sister call you?

- Was she supposed to?
- No.

Uh, come on in.

Can I get you a drink or anything?

Yes, please.

I just wanted to check
on you, though, man.

I brought some brownies.

Un, not the special kind of brownies

- Kyle's mom used to make?
- No.

I still don't understand
the point of a fiber brownie.

Right, uh...

Hey, man, so how is everything?
How-How's Cameron doing?

Uh, she's great, actually.

You know, I thought pregnancy
was gonna be more like

naps and morning sickness,

but the woman's got
more energy than ever.

That's great, right? Must be exciting.

Yeah. Yeah, I think so.

You hope for something for so long
and then when it finally happens...

it doesn't quite feel real.

Well, uh, it's gonna feel
pretty real pretty soon.

Yeah, yeah, it's gonna be great.

Um, but what about you, though, man?
I tried calling.

Uh, yeah, I was-I was living
in a cell-free zone.

But no, I-I'm good, I got no complaints.

Just waiting for the doctor to give me

the all-clear to resume my life.

All the rest and relaxation
starting to get to you, huh?

You know, there's been less of
that than you might think.

Uh, give me one second.

I brought Sudoku.

Hi, Josh.

Oh, sorry.

- Did I get my time wrong?
- I don't know.

What time did Maddie
tell you to be here?

Uh...

Okay.

I promise that
you didn't ruin anything, Josh.

He was on to me
way before you showed up.

But thanks for checking in on him.

Okay. I'll see you tomorrow.

- Hey.
- Hi.

Let me guess. Operation Buck
Up Buttercup has been blown?

He was suspicious of the pot roast,
but he figured it out by Sudoku.

Because, as much as I like
making fun of your brother,

he's not an actual idiot.

Which is good news.
Because I know you're worried about him

doing too much, too fast,

but I think he's taking
his recovery seriously.

I really hope so.

What is this?

That is a fondue set.

Hen dropped it off.
No, I don't know why.

Is that Buck?

Julie Rosen.

She and some of the guys were
supposed to bring him dinner.

He was not home, but he left a note:

"Tell Maddie I went out."

Uh-oh. He's gone on the lam.

Hey.

Please don't ask me how I am.

Okay.

- Want a beer?
- Eh, probably more than one.

Guess all that company
must've wore you out.

All right.

Cheers.

Hello?

Hi.

Tamara, is that you?

Are you high?

Please don't be mad at me.

I feel like everyone's always mad at me.

I am not mad at you.

You seem really nice.

Wendall was really nice, too.

Maybe that's why you guys were friends.

I don't have any friends.

Wendall tried...

...but he's dead now.

Maybe I can be your friend.

Carrie and Trey wouldn't like that.

They say I'm only safe
under their supervision.

Well, I don't think that's true.

Why don't I come and get you?

- You'd do that?
- Yeah.

That's... really nice.

You seem really nice.

But I think it's too late for that.

No, no.

I just wanted to say...

I'm really sorry about Wendall.

I wish I could say that to him.

- Uh...
- I...

Maybe I can soon.

Tamara?

I'm so tired.

Tamara?

Tamara.

And I'm tired now. So tired.

You've reached
Athena Grant. Leave a message.

Athena, Tamara just called me.
Sounded like she's in really bad shape.

I feel like I got to go check on her.
Give me a call when you get this.

How did I pass out so fast?

You fell asleep before I got the
beers out of the refrigerator.

- Sorry.
- Nah, no worries. Still want that beer?

Uh... Maybe some water.

Agua on the way.

Thank you.

There you go, sir.

I mean, it-it's fine if you
want to have a beer.

I already did. Both of them.

Right.

Hey, what do you remember
about getting shot?

There was a searing pain.

It felt like I got hit by a bus.

And I was still standing.

I remember falling.

And everything got dark.

And I thought, this is it.

This is the last moment of my life.

Then I woke up in the hospital.

And that was it?

That was it.

No bright white lights,
no trippy mind puzzles, just...

thought I was dead and...

then I wasn't.

So now am I allowed to ask how you are?

Uh...

Honestly, Eddie, I...

I don't know.

You died, Buck.

You're gonna feel a lot
of different ways about that.

Sometimes all at the same time.

I found the best way
to process it is to...

...allow yourself to feel it.

Yeah, but you... You do
eventually, right? You...

You process it.

Every day you open your eyes
in the morning,

you feel a little less surprised
the world is still there.

I know you.

I'm looking for Tamara.

I told you before,
we don't give out information...

I know, patient confidentiality.

But she called me from here
and asked me to pick her up.

Who called you?

Tamara.

Well, she's a very troubled girl.

- You can save it. Where is she?
- Not here.

Whatever you said
must've really scared her.

- Tamara!
- Is that how you like

to spend your time?
Terrorizing young women?

Hey. This is private property.
I'm gonna ask you to leave.

Hey.

Leave!

Trey!

I'm calling 911.

Yeah. Ask them to send someone
to arrest you.

- I'd like to report an intruder.
- Tamara!

And an assault in progress at
the Winding Path Residence.

Tamara!

Tamara?

Everyone out! He's dangerous!

Tamara?

- Do you know Tamara?
- Mm-mm.

Tamara!

Tamara?

Tamara!

Tamara.

Tamara. Tamara. Can you hear me?
Can you hear me?

It's you.

I didn't think you'd come.

She said you'd come,
but I didn't believe her.

What? Who-who said that?

Carrie. She said you're a do-gooder.

All right, Tamara,
let's get you out of here.

Nice and easy. Come here.

This is the room where people die.

Nope, nobody's dying in here.

Wendall died in here.

- What?
- He said he was gonna

take them down,
but they got to him first.

Come here. Come here. Come on.

Okay, is this where
Wendall hid the camera?

Do you know where the camera is?

He said they'd never find it.

I think someone burned the toast again.

Smoke?

Tamara, the building's on fire!
We got to go!

Why is it always fire with them?

Hang on to me. Come on, let's go.

Come on.

Come on.

Come on, Tamara. Come on.

Come on, Tamara. Stay with me.

Stay with me, Tamara. Come on.

Let's go.

Okay, all right. Come here. Okay.

Okay. You're okay.

A little help! Over here!

She's gonna need to be treated
for smoke inhalation and narcotic use.

Probably opioids.

You got her?

Thank you.

We'll take care of her.

All right.

What have we got?

Detective Phelps,
these are our witnesses.

That's him! He pushed his way in

and he attacked my husband.

And said that he would make us all pay.

What are you talking about?

And then he started the fire.

- Arrest him!
- That is a lie.

He's been here before.

He harassed me a couple of months ago.

We've always tried to protect
our residents,

but we had no idea
what this man was capable of

until it was too late.

That's his truck right over there.

Reeks of gasoline.

Go check it out.

Is that your vehicle, sir?

Yeah, that's my truck,
but I have no idea

how that got there.

He barged in and the whole place
went up in smoke.

Quite an accusation.

He has a history.

His family died in a very
suspicious fire in Minnesota.

This is what he does.

I've taken statements
from Carrie and Trey Walsh.

And the receptionist
at Winding Path, Rochelle.

They've got quite a lot to say.

Most of it's not good for you.

Evidently you were seen on the property

more than once after Wendall died.

And they of course
have surveillance footage

they are more than happy to provide.

They say you harassed several
of their employees.

Including some sort of threat
at a flower shop?

The word "stalking" was used
several times, by multiple people.

So, look, here's what I'm looking at.

I got a pile of ash where
there used to be a house.

And I've got a suspect
who knows an awful lot

about starting fires.

And I got witnesses
who are willing to testify

they saw you start the fire.

And I got physical evidence
that corroborates this whole story,

that was found
in the back of your truck.

I mean, it's a lot.

I don't even think a jury's
gonna leave the courtroom to deliberate.

They're gonna pronounce you guilty

before they even leave the box.

Save everybody an awful lot of time.

I got a perfect trail of breadcrumbs

leading straight up to your front door.

But here's my problem:

I don't trust perfect.

See, I think there's more to this story.

And I think that if I'm gonna hear it,
it's gonna come from you.

I can help you, Captain,
if you talk to me.

I have someone I need you to call.

Your friend planted
a camera at Winding Path?

We think so.

I looked when I went inside,
couldn't find it.

Bobby had no idea
what he was looking for.

A camera can look like almost
anything nowadays.

But we finally
tracked down the guy who sold it

and he told me where to look.

You feeling all right, Tamara?

What about the firefighter? Is he okay?

He's safe. He's in custody.

Carrie and Trey say that he's
the one who set the fire.

No. That's not what happened.

Then why don't you
tell us what really happened?

Wendall said this camera
was gonna save us all.

But instead it got him killed.

I'd been in and out of
Winding Path for over a year.

And never really getting any better.

One day, I walked past this church.

The sign said all were welcome.

That's how I met Wendall.

I know it's hard.

I know what you're going through,

and believe me,
I have been there before.

I don't think you have.

Why don't you try me?

I told him about Winding Path.

How it never seemed
like anyone got clean.

I can't do anything right.

About the overdoses.

Five that I knew about.

I was so scared, but Wendall...

he got mad.

There's got to be a way
to stop these people

before anyone else dies there.

Carrie and Trey are too smart for that.

They always have a plan.

Maybe we need to make our own plan.

He checked himself in.

Said his employer was making him do it.

The fee was pretty steep,

but he only needed a couple
hours to fool Carrie and Trey.

By the time the check bounced,
he'd be long gone.

I knew that he'd be searched
so I smuggled the camera in.

Do you need me to help you with that?

It's better if you don't know
what I do next.

That way you don't have to lie.

Okay. The office is down
the hall to the right.

They keep everything there.

I was supposed
to find Carrie and distract her.

But I guess she was already on to us.

- You need to hurry up.
- Where's Carrie?

I don't know. Something's wrong.

What are you doing in here?

I just got turned around, just...

Big house, lots of rooms.

She was just telling me
to get the hell out of here.

Is that all?

Yeah. That was all.

I saw the two of you
in the hallway earlier.

Thick as thieves.

And now I find you
in here, together again.

And I can't help but wonder...

just how stupid do you think I am?

- Carrie, it's not like that.
- Tamara.

We took you in.
When you were at your lowest.

No one wanted to deal with you.

Your own parents couldn't wait
to get rid of you.

But we, we cared for you,
despite your numerous flaws.

And all we asked for in return...

is honesty.

I'm sorry, Carrie, I'm sorry.

This is my fault. This is my fault.

She didn't want to bring
me here. I insisted.

Why?

Someone mentioned this
might be the place where I could,

you know, find something
to take the edge off.

Oh.

All you had to do was ask.

Sorry. Not sure about the rules here.

Oh, we don't have that
many hard and fast rules.

Everybody's path to recovery
is different.

Thanks.

Think I'll take this to my room.

You'll take it here.

That is a rule.

Not really one to put on a show.

Okay. Don't take it then.

Maybe Tamara will.

She's been shockingly sober
for the past few weeks.

It's very unlike her.

Um...

Sure. It's been a while.

It was a test.

And I failed.

But Wendall still tried to cover for me.

Uh, sorry. I think this is... mine.

We'll give you a minute.

Tamara, a word.

Who is he? And what is he doing here?

I don't know. He's just some guy.

- You're lying.
- No, I swear.

Wendall...

Oh, my God.

- He's dead. Wendall...
- You did this.

This is your fault.

- I'm so sorry.
- Trey!

Get in here!

- Come back.
- Now!

Trey!

If I hadn't told Wendall the truth...

if I hadn't brought him
to Winding Path Residence,

he'd still be alive.

Carrie lies about everything.

But I think that part... was true.

Wendall wasn't like other people.

Anyone else looks away
when they see someone's pain.

Wendall didn't do that.

He took it on, made it his own.

That's what he did for me.

Wendall broke his sobriety
so that Tamara could keep hers.

He thought he could take it.
Pass Carrie's test and save them both.

He didn't know it would kill him.

I think he would've done it anyway.

Folks, please stand
back. Give us some space.

Let's go.

It was all her idea. All of it.

I just raised the initial seed
money to start Winding Path.

She said that you can't make money

running a legitimate rehab center.

If you're too good,

the customer only pays once.

We offered them salvation.

But my husband got too ambitious.

It was all her idea.

It was her idea to call

that fire captain and lure him there.

She used Tamara as bait.

Hello?

Hi.

He said what?

Your husband's taking a plea deal.

You're the last one
going down with the ship.

Trey thought if we burned
the whole place down,

we could get the insurance money.

And run.

Turned on each other
like a pack of hungry dogs.

Did you get everything you need?

Oh, and then some.
Yeah, those two were real talkers.

You know, it turns out
they've done this before.

Operated another dirty rehab?

- Mm.
- Well, we searched for other locations

operated by the Walshes.
But never found any.

They weren't Walshes then.

When we started looking
for other privately owned rehabs

that conveniently burned to the ground

when authorities
started asking questions,

first one in Westchester County,
the other one in Palm Beach.

- Grifters got to grift.
- Yeah.

Thanks, Detective.

It'll be good to see these two put away.

No problem.

I don't really feel like I did much.

Oh, hey, Sergeant?

Sorry about Wendall's death.

Everyone we interviewed
said he was a good guy.

He was.

You're looking good.

You passed your cardiac stress test

and your troponin levels
have stabilized quite nicely.

How you feeling?

Yeah, like I'm getting my strength back.

Good.

Your O2 levels are
consistently above 96,

so I take it you're not
having any trouble breathing?

No, none.

Well, at this point, there aren't
really any remaining medical reasons

you can't return to all
your regular activities.

Including resuming full-time employment

as early as next week if you so choose.

Really? You-You're sure?

Would you like a second opinion?

Well, it's just you
keep on ordering these tests.

I was doing my due diligence
as a doctor.

I've also been having
this weird feeling, like a...

sense of dread.

It's not unusual, given
what you've been through.

My sister keeps on looking at me,

uh, like she thinks I'm gonna die.

Again.

Well, that I cannot help you with.

Uh...

Hey, you, um...

You see people who've been through...

near-death experiences
all the time, right?

It's an unfortunately large
percentage of my clientele.

What happens to them after?

They just... go back
to their same old lives,

go back to being the same old people?

Some do.

They tell me that almost dying

makes them appreciate what they have.

But for others, they'll walk
out of my office and...

decide to quit their job,
or leave their spouse.

And for some reason, a lot
of them want to go to Italy.

That's one place I've never been.

What I've learned from watching them
is that water finds its own level.

And people do, too.

Recovery is a bumpy road.

But eventually...

everyone finds their equilibrium.

Even if it is in another country.

I got this.

No way, you got the last one.

I didn't realize we were keeping track.

Bobby.

Sorry, am I ambushing you again?

Not at all. It's great to see you.

Well, it's good to see you, too.

I heard you were working here now,

- I wanted to check up on you.
- It's crazy, right?

The owner saw the story on the news

- and reached out, offered me a job,
- Ah.

On the condition that I stay clean.

How's that going?

It was a rough detox, but...

- I'm feeling a lot better now.
- Good.

Or at least remembering
what it used to feel like.

Before all of this.

Well, I am really glad to see
you back on your feet.

Thanks to you.

And him.

- Yeah.
- I still can't believe it.

No, you've been through a lot.

May take you some time to...

put all those feelings into focus.

No, I just mean I can't believe
that the both of you

went to these great lengths to help me.

When neither of you
really even knew me and...

didn't owe me anything.

I was just someone sitting
in the back of the room at a meeting.

So was I.

You have to stop trying to fix me.

- Buck, that's not...
- The cooked meals,

the groceries, the babysitting brigade,

it-it's all too much.

I'm just trying to help you.

I know you are.
But I can take care of myself.

But I don't want you to feel
like you have to.

Look, when I was sick, I felt so alone.

And I didn't want to ask for help
because I didn't want to be a burden.

But then I just...

I kept drifting farther away until...

Till you were gone.

Whatever it is you're feeling,
you don't have to hide it.

Um...

When-when I wake up,

uh, and I mean like every single time,

I have this-this checklist now

that I run in my head,
like a way to test that I'm really here.

So, what do you check?

First, uh, time of day.

For some reason, it's never
night in my coma dream.

Then I-I text Bobby,
make sure he's okay.

Today is a special day.

Today was meant to be
a day of celebration.

Because today...

would've been my friend
and sponsor Wendall's...

ten-year anniversary of sobriety.

We talked about milestones
like this when I first got here.

Actually, when I first got here,
Wendall did most of the talking.

And we started setting these
goals for ourselves.

He had his, I had mine.

And slowly they became the same.

And more slowly still,
along with others,

Wendall helped save my life.

And he reminded me that there
is always a reason to live,

to fight for another day.

And that no matter how dark
that tunnel gets,

there's always a light at the end of it.

And that part of that darkness
is believing that it will never end,

that we will never be free.

But that is a lie.

That is a lie.

And our addiction is fuel on that fire.

So now if I find myself walking
down that dark tunnel,

I will know that Wendall
is still with me.

All I have to do is reach out my hand.

Thank you for coming and celebrating

our dear lost friend.

And I want to finish by asking if...

anyone feels a burning need
to use or do self-harm,

because if so, we are here...

to listen and help.

Oh, excuse me.

Well, Wendall would be very proud.

I hope so. Thank you.

You ready to get out of here?

I think I need a few minutes.

You take all the time you need.

- All right. I love you.
- Love you.

Mind if I sit?

Think I've been where you are right now.

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