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1
00:00:01,218 --> 00:00:06,049
โช Happy birthday to you
2
00:00:06,093 --> 00:00:07,050
โช Happy--
3
00:00:07,094 --> 00:00:09,052
Hit that high note.
4
00:00:09,096 --> 00:00:11,707
โช ...dear Ryan
5
00:00:11,750 --> 00:00:16,494
โช Happy birthday to you
6
00:00:16,538 --> 00:00:19,454
โช And how old
7
00:00:19,497 --> 00:00:22,152
โช Are you, Ryan?
8
00:00:22,196 --> 00:00:23,284
Here she goes again.
9
00:00:23,327 --> 00:00:28,376
โช How o-o-o-old are you
10
00:00:28,419 --> 00:00:30,073
โช Ryan?
11
00:00:30,117 --> 00:00:35,165
โช How o-o-old
12
00:00:35,209 --> 00:00:38,516
โช Are yo-o-o-o-u?
13
00:00:38,560 --> 00:00:40,257
I'm 6.
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00:00:41,737 --> 00:00:44,479
โช May the good Lord
15
00:00:44,522 --> 00:00:48,613
โช Bless yo-o-o-o-o-u
16
00:01:01,148 --> 00:01:02,323
Okay, now,
does anybody remember
17
00:01:02,366 --> 00:01:04,368
what was in
this container before?
18
00:01:04,412 --> 00:01:06,370
- Oh, oh.
- Erin, go for it.
19
00:01:06,414 --> 00:01:08,242
Ice. Brr.
20
00:01:08,285 --> 00:01:10,766
I will accept "Ice. Brr."
21
00:01:10,809 --> 00:01:13,551
Now, there was an ice cube
in this container before, right?
22
00:01:13,595 --> 00:01:15,205
Mum!
23
00:01:15,249 --> 00:01:16,598
Micah, why are you
yelling in my class?
24
00:01:16,641 --> 00:01:18,121
Is your mum here right now?
25
00:01:18,165 --> 00:01:20,776
Mr. Eddie, you're silly.
26
00:01:20,819 --> 00:01:22,691
No, I'm not.
27
00:01:22,734 --> 00:01:24,736
Um, so there was an ice cube
in here before,
28
00:01:24,780 --> 00:01:27,391
but now, there's just water.
29
00:01:27,435 --> 00:01:29,785
What do we think happened
to that ice cube?
30
00:01:29,828 --> 00:01:33,223
I love Bingo!
31
00:01:33,267 --> 00:01:35,399
This isn't the first time
Micah has disrupted my class.
32
00:01:35,443 --> 00:01:37,271
From what I understand,
he's obsessed with a TV show
33
00:01:37,314 --> 00:01:39,142
about Australian dogs.
34
00:01:39,186 --> 00:01:40,622
"Blue-ish" or something.
35
00:01:40,665 --> 00:01:42,406
I don't know.
It doesn't matter.
36
00:01:42,450 --> 00:01:43,712
What matters is I've tried
everything to keep him in line
37
00:01:43,755 --> 00:01:45,540
and nothing works.
38
00:01:45,583 --> 00:01:48,369
It's gotten to the point where
even his classmates are annoyed.
39
00:01:48,412 --> 00:01:50,545
Do you know how hard it is
to annoy a first grader?
40
00:01:50,588 --> 00:01:52,199
Bingo! Bingo!
41
00:01:52,242 --> 00:01:54,418
Bingo, Bingo, Bingo!
42
00:01:54,462 --> 00:01:55,506
Um, everybody, e-eyes up here.
43
00:01:55,550 --> 00:01:57,639
Bingo, Bluey!
44
00:01:57,682 --> 00:01:59,162
"Bluey."
45
00:01:59,206 --> 00:02:00,642
The show is called "Bluey."
46
00:02:00,685 --> 00:02:04,298
And then, Tariq said,
"Let's get ready to rumbly!"
47
00:02:05,516 --> 00:02:06,778
Because my tummy was rumbly.
48
00:02:06,822 --> 00:02:08,606
It was funny.
49
00:02:08,650 --> 00:02:10,521
Oh, my God.
Are those pork rinds?
50
00:02:10,565 --> 00:02:12,741
W...
I know.
51
00:02:12,784 --> 00:02:15,396
I've been talking
about my ex too much.
52
00:02:16,745 --> 00:02:18,616
Jacob tells me
I sound like a lesbian.
53
00:02:18,660 --> 00:02:19,617
I'm working on it.
54
00:02:19,661 --> 00:02:20,836
No. Not that.
55
00:02:20,879 --> 00:02:23,839
I mean, yeah, you do,
but this food.
56
00:02:23,882 --> 00:02:27,190
You eat like you took
a cooking class in prison.
57
00:02:27,234 --> 00:02:29,801
You know,
it's funny you say that,
58
00:02:29,845 --> 00:02:31,673
because my play cousin
Meechie just got out
59
00:02:31,716 --> 00:02:32,804
and taught me this.
60
00:02:32,848 --> 00:02:34,632
It's so delicious
and cheap.
61
00:02:34,676 --> 00:02:36,373
Oh, so
it's about money?
62
00:02:36,417 --> 00:02:38,636
'Cause I can stretch a budget
like a big headed baby
63
00:02:38,680 --> 00:02:40,508
stretches a...
64
00:02:40,551 --> 00:02:43,554
It's not about money.
65
00:02:43,598 --> 00:02:46,731
My mom never taught my sister
or I how to cook.
66
00:02:46,775 --> 00:02:48,603
So everybody just got
a sister now?
67
00:02:48,646 --> 00:02:50,431
Tariq used to do
the cooking.
68
00:02:50,474 --> 00:02:51,867
He used to say,
"Call me Chef Tariq-riq,
69
00:02:51,910 --> 00:02:54,217
'cause when you cook,
it stink-stink."
70
00:02:54,261 --> 00:02:55,653
You know no one's making you
tell these stories, right?
71
00:02:55,697 --> 00:02:58,221
I know.
Okay, listen,
I can teach you
72
00:02:58,265 --> 00:03:00,876
how to make a cheap,
non-embarrassing meal.
73
00:03:00,919 --> 00:03:02,791
It might take you five days
to finish it,
74
00:03:02,834 --> 00:03:04,271
but it'll be delicious,
75
00:03:04,314 --> 00:03:05,576
so it won't skeeve you
till the third day.
76
00:03:05,620 --> 00:03:07,448
Really?
Yeah.
77
00:03:07,491 --> 00:03:09,493
Oh, God.
78
00:03:09,537 --> 00:03:11,495
I'm gonna regret this, but...
79
00:03:11,539 --> 00:03:13,323
you just come
to my place tonight.
80
00:03:13,367 --> 00:03:15,847
What time?
I mean, can I come?
81
00:03:15,891 --> 00:03:17,849
I need you to help me
with my wine pairings.
82
00:03:17,893 --> 00:03:20,678
Zach-- he gets embarrassed
when I ask the clerk for the,
83
00:03:20,722 --> 00:03:22,550
"second least
expensive bottle."
84
00:03:22,593 --> 00:03:23,855
Well, I couldn't think
of a reason
85
00:03:23,899 --> 00:03:25,509
why you can't quick enough,
86
00:03:25,553 --> 00:03:28,425
so yeah, I frickin' guess
- you can, buddy.
- Yay.
87
00:03:28,469 --> 00:03:31,428
And we'll just get rid
- of that.
- Whoa.
88
00:03:31,472 --> 00:03:33,952
Hey, man, can you, uh,
pass me a sugar packet?
89
00:03:46,965 --> 00:03:48,315
Talk to me, bro.
90
00:03:48,358 --> 00:03:49,707
Try again.
Copy that.
91
00:03:49,751 --> 00:03:51,448
Uh, hey, Gregory.
92
00:03:51,492 --> 00:03:53,885
Is there anything you want to
get off your chest?
93
00:03:53,929 --> 00:03:56,714
I have this kid-- Micah.
94
00:03:56,758 --> 00:03:59,630
I can't stop him
from disrupting my class.
95
00:03:59,674 --> 00:04:01,328
It's like he can sense
whenever I feel like
96
00:04:01,371 --> 00:04:02,720
I'm getting a handle
on something,
97
00:04:02,764 --> 00:04:04,592
and he just swoops in
like a cute little falcon
98
00:04:04,635 --> 00:04:05,593
and rips me apart.
99
00:04:05,636 --> 00:04:07,029
Foof.
100
00:04:07,072 --> 00:04:09,466
I have been there.
101
00:04:09,510 --> 00:04:12,469
All the students
bringing the correct energy.
102
00:04:12,513 --> 00:04:15,385
Insightful answers
popping off left and right.
103
00:04:15,429 --> 00:04:18,910
And then
someone goes and kills the vibe.
104
00:04:18,954 --> 00:04:20,390
Yeah, I hated
all of those sentences,
105
00:04:20,434 --> 00:04:21,478
but how do you
handle it?
106
00:04:21,522 --> 00:04:23,741
Well, like last week,
107
00:04:23,785 --> 00:04:25,830
every time Aaliyah
would give a correct answer,
108
00:04:25,874 --> 00:04:28,616
she would say,
"I'm on your ass, Mr. C."
109
00:04:28,659 --> 00:04:29,573
You still letting them
call you that?
110
00:04:29,617 --> 00:04:30,835
Eh, it's out of love.
111
00:04:30,879 --> 00:04:32,359
But when she said it,
112
00:04:32,402 --> 00:04:34,012
the class would burst out
in laughter.
113
00:04:34,056 --> 00:04:37,407
It was
an untenable situation.
114
00:04:37,451 --> 00:04:39,931
So I sent her
- to the principal's office.
- To Ava?
115
00:04:39,975 --> 00:04:41,498
The magnitude seve--
116
00:04:41,542 --> 00:04:43,108
Don't nobody care
about that earthquake.
117
00:04:43,152 --> 00:04:45,937
Turn it back, or there'll be
another national emergency.
118
00:04:47,112 --> 00:04:49,376
- And that was helpful?
- Yeah.
119
00:04:49,419 --> 00:04:52,117
Like, it made me feel like the
mayor of White Guiltsylvania,
120
00:04:52,161 --> 00:04:54,598
but, uh, it--
it did help.
121
00:04:54,642 --> 00:04:58,428
Look, I can't have one student
ruining the lesson for everyone.
122
00:04:58,472 --> 00:05:00,517
If you've really tried
everything else,
123
00:05:00,561 --> 00:05:01,953
you know,
give it a shot.
124
00:05:03,868 --> 00:05:06,958
That's a good idea, actually.
125
00:05:07,002 --> 00:05:07,959
Thank you?
126
00:05:08,003 --> 00:05:10,310
Oh, you're welcome.
127
00:05:13,574 --> 00:05:14,531
That is your coffee.
128
00:05:14,575 --> 00:05:16,533
It was.
129
00:05:16,577 --> 00:05:18,361
Hey.
130
00:05:18,405 --> 00:05:19,797
Oh, good.
You brought the opps.
131
00:05:19,841 --> 00:05:21,930
And hello to you, too, Melissa.
132
00:05:21,973 --> 00:05:24,846
- Oh, wow.
- Wow.
133
00:05:24,889 --> 00:05:26,978
Hey, I, uh--
I brought this.
134
00:05:27,022 --> 00:05:28,806
I think it's called a "blend"
'cause they just mix
135
00:05:28,850 --> 00:05:30,808
all the best wines together.
136
00:05:30,852 --> 00:05:32,897
Is that--Yes, my cousin Vinny,
and you wouldn't know that
137
00:05:32,941 --> 00:05:34,682
if you were minding
your own business.
138
00:05:34,725 --> 00:05:37,511
So now close your eyes and
follow the sound of my voice.
139
00:05:37,554 --> 00:05:39,861
This way.
140
00:05:40,862 --> 00:05:42,646
You think this
is a [bleep] joke?
141
00:05:42,690 --> 00:05:44,648
Ma'am.
Eyes.
142
00:05:44,692 --> 00:05:47,129
Yeah, at school, I make sure
I don't use salty language.
143
00:05:47,172 --> 00:05:48,391
It's my house.
144
00:05:48,435 --> 00:05:49,784
I don't give a
145
00:05:49,827 --> 00:05:51,176
Oh, it's a video.
I thought it was a picture.
146
00:05:51,220 --> 00:05:53,657
Oh, me, too. Ugh!
147
00:05:53,701 --> 00:05:55,659
But that's okay, though.
Just save it.
148
00:05:55,703 --> 00:05:57,008
We can upload--
Oh, my God.
149
00:05:57,052 --> 00:05:58,793
How come
you got a shallot?
150
00:05:58,836 --> 00:06:00,925
- A what now?
- A shallot.
I said get an onion.
151
00:06:00,969 --> 00:06:02,405
Oh, Janine thought it was
an onion
152
00:06:02,449 --> 00:06:04,059
that was adorable
and small like her,
153
00:06:04,102 --> 00:06:06,017
and who am I
to shatter that illusion.
154
00:06:06,061 --> 00:06:07,802
Does it really matter?
155
00:06:07,845 --> 00:06:09,107
Does it matter?
156
00:06:09,151 --> 00:06:11,414
Janine, come on.
Of course it matters.
157
00:06:11,458 --> 00:06:14,025
Ooh! Now I get to patronize
a local vendor.
158
00:06:14,069 --> 00:06:15,636
BRB.
159
00:06:15,679 --> 00:06:18,508
I love haggling with
neighborhood merchants.
160
00:06:18,552 --> 00:06:21,859
You should see their faces when
I counter with a higher price.
161
00:06:21,903 --> 00:06:25,036
You've heard of up-selling?
Well, I'm an up-buyer.
162
00:06:25,080 --> 00:06:27,212
If you get a white onion,
I swear to God.
163
00:06:27,256 --> 00:06:29,606
Hmm.
164
00:06:29,650 --> 00:06:32,522
So, do I have to be that
specific about ingredients?
165
00:06:32,566 --> 00:06:34,655
I mean, well, I wonder
if I could switch it up.
166
00:06:34,698 --> 00:06:37,048
I hear cooking's like jazz.
167
00:06:37,092 --> 00:06:39,529
No, Dizzy Gillespie.
It's not like that.
168
00:06:39,573 --> 00:06:40,878
You got to be specific.
169
00:06:40,922 --> 00:06:42,880
My sister Kristin Marie
used the wrong ingredient
170
00:06:42,924 --> 00:06:44,491
making our nana's
signature dish
171
00:06:44,534 --> 00:06:46,536
and brought that dish
to her wake.
172
00:06:46,580 --> 00:06:47,755
I haven't spoken to her since.
173
00:06:48,625 --> 00:06:51,062
Phew! Well, I may not know
about cooking,
174
00:06:51,106 --> 00:06:52,977
but I know a thing
or two about sisters.
175
00:06:56,894 --> 00:06:59,462
So does your sister--
176
00:07:04,119 --> 00:07:06,077
That's really loud.
177
00:07:06,121 --> 00:07:07,557
Alright, you're not
getting the hint.
178
00:07:07,601 --> 00:07:08,863
Go ahead, finish.
179
00:07:08,906 --> 00:07:10,430
Hint?
180
00:07:10,473 --> 00:07:13,955
Anyway [sighs] my sister and I
aren't that close either.
181
00:07:13,998 --> 00:07:15,826
I mean, literally.
182
00:07:15,870 --> 00:07:19,090
She moved to Colorado because
she just couldn't take my mom.
183
00:07:19,134 --> 00:07:21,136
I mean, we still talk.
184
00:07:22,311 --> 00:07:24,052
Sorry.
185
00:07:26,663 --> 00:07:30,624
Garlic, you know, makes you--
makes you cry.
186
00:07:30,667 --> 00:07:33,540
Yeah, garlic doesn't do that.
Do it like this.
187
00:07:33,583 --> 00:07:35,629
I know that Melissa's quick
to cut people off.
188
00:07:35,672 --> 00:07:37,065
She even stopped talking
to her hairdresser
189
00:07:37,108 --> 00:07:38,675
because he called her
Melinda once,
190
00:07:38,719 --> 00:07:41,591
but, I mean, her own sister?
191
00:07:41,635 --> 00:07:42,940
That's just heartbreaking.
192
00:07:42,984 --> 00:07:45,247
Hey, Melissa.
193
00:07:45,290 --> 00:07:46,814
I was just thinking
about last night,
194
00:07:46,857 --> 00:07:48,598
when you said you don't
talk to your sister.
195
00:07:48,642 --> 00:07:50,774
Well, you can stop
thinking about it.
196
00:07:50,818 --> 00:07:52,341
I bet you miss her, though, right?
197
00:07:52,384 --> 00:07:53,603
Yeah, of course I miss her,
but she was wrong.
198
00:07:53,647 --> 00:07:55,518
What am I gonna do?
Apologize to myself?
199
00:07:55,562 --> 00:07:56,954
Well, maybe--
maybe there was a reason
200
00:07:56,998 --> 00:07:58,434
for the substitution,
you know?
201
00:07:58,478 --> 00:07:59,827
There's always two sides
to every story.
202
00:07:59,870 --> 00:08:02,699
And one of those is
the right side, which is mine.
203
00:08:02,743 --> 00:08:04,309
Well, do you think
you would consider ever,
204
00:08:04,353 --> 00:08:06,790
you know,
mending fences with her?
205
00:08:06,834 --> 00:08:08,618
Yeah.
Sure, that'd be nice,
206
00:08:08,662 --> 00:08:11,316
but Kristin Marie
would have to come to me,
207
00:08:11,360 --> 00:08:12,535
and she's never
gonna do that,
208
00:08:12,579 --> 00:08:14,798
so let's stop talking
about it, okay?
209
00:08:15,886 --> 00:08:19,760
Maybe Kristin Marie wouldn't,
but Janine Marie would.
210
00:08:19,803 --> 00:08:22,502
What are you up t-- Wait,
your middle name is Marie?
211
00:08:22,545 --> 00:08:24,591
No, it is not.
My mom forgot to give me one.
212
00:08:24,634 --> 00:08:26,941
I may or may not be hatching
a little plan
213
00:08:26,984 --> 00:08:29,509
to reunite
Melissa and her sister.
214
00:08:29,552 --> 00:08:30,988
I've hatched many a plan
in my day,
215
00:08:31,032 --> 00:08:34,426
and this one is gonna
drive the coop crazy.
216
00:08:34,470 --> 00:08:37,952
Okay, now, rain is an example
of water in its liquid state.
217
00:08:37,995 --> 00:08:41,303
Bluey is from down under.
218
00:08:41,346 --> 00:08:43,348
Micah, if you keep distracting
your classmates,
219
00:08:43,392 --> 00:08:44,698
you're gonna leave me
with no other choice
220
00:08:44,741 --> 00:08:46,308
but to send you
to the principal's office.
221
00:08:46,351 --> 00:08:47,962
Oooh.
222
00:08:48,005 --> 00:08:52,357
Now, we already know that ice
is a solid, but water is a--
223
00:08:52,401 --> 00:08:55,404
Have you ever been
down under?
224
00:08:55,447 --> 00:08:58,973
Micah... I didn't want to
have to do this,
225
00:08:59,016 --> 00:09:00,452
but you leave me
with no choice.
226
00:09:00,496 --> 00:09:02,280
Gather your things.
227
00:09:02,324 --> 00:09:03,891
You're going to see
Principal Coleman.
228
00:09:03,934 --> 00:09:07,547
Ooooooh!
229
00:09:09,723 --> 00:09:13,640
Looking good.
Great job, you guys.
230
00:09:13,683 --> 00:09:15,032
Hey.
231
00:09:15,076 --> 00:09:16,643
What's up?
232
00:09:16,686 --> 00:09:17,992
I need to take this one
to principal's office.
233
00:09:18,035 --> 00:09:18,993
Can you watch my class
for a second?
234
00:09:19,036 --> 00:09:20,690
The principal's office?
235
00:09:20,734 --> 00:09:23,345
Don't you think that's a little
harsh for a kid that young?
236
00:09:23,388 --> 00:09:26,957
I mean, I've never had to even
take any of my kids to Ava.
237
00:09:27,001 --> 00:09:28,872
Well, this is
a unique situation.
238
00:09:28,916 --> 00:09:30,308
How so?
239
00:09:30,352 --> 00:09:31,788
Can you help me or not?
240
00:09:31,832 --> 00:09:33,660
Well, I just think maybe there
might be some other options.
241
00:09:33,703 --> 00:09:36,880
You two in a fight?
242
00:09:36,924 --> 00:09:39,404
Looks like y'all
in a fight.
243
00:09:39,448 --> 00:09:40,623
- I'll be right over.
- Thank you.
244
00:09:40,667 --> 00:09:42,669
Thank you.
Come on, Micah.
245
00:09:44,496 --> 00:09:46,760
You can walk faster.
246
00:09:46,803 --> 00:09:47,935
How have things been going
since I sent Micah
247
00:09:47,978 --> 00:09:49,676
to the principal's office?
248
00:09:52,461 --> 00:09:53,593
Pretty well, I'd say.
249
00:09:56,334 --> 00:09:58,423
Here I am, returning
Micah after a short,
250
00:09:58,467 --> 00:10:00,817
yet respectable amount
of time in my office.
251
00:10:00,861 --> 00:10:02,906
So, Micah, do you have anything
you want to say to the class?
252
00:10:02,950 --> 00:10:05,387
- Not really.
- What do you want him
to say?
253
00:10:05,430 --> 00:10:07,650
I want him to apologize
for disrupting the class
254
00:10:07,694 --> 00:10:08,999
and tell us
it'll never happen again.
255
00:10:09,043 --> 00:10:10,392
Of course it's gonna
happen again.
256
00:10:10,435 --> 00:10:11,393
You want him to lie
to your face?
257
00:10:11,436 --> 00:10:12,612
No.
258
00:10:12,655 --> 00:10:14,570
Don't forget
your axolotl.
259
00:10:14,614 --> 00:10:17,399
Hey, Micah, what does
an axolotl do on vacation?
260
00:10:17,442 --> 00:10:18,618
Relax-alotl.
261
00:10:18,661 --> 00:10:19,923
I know that's right.
262
00:10:19,967 --> 00:10:22,796
Hey--Hey, why does he
get a toy?
263
00:10:22,839 --> 00:10:25,799
I wanna get sent to
the principal's office, too.
264
00:10:25,842 --> 00:10:27,061
Me, too!
265
00:10:27,104 --> 00:10:29,672
No. No.
Okay. No.
266
00:10:29,716 --> 00:10:31,892
We're not-- We're not do--
267
00:10:35,722 --> 00:10:37,549
And then, he pulls out
a lollipop that she gave him.
268
00:10:37,593 --> 00:10:39,029
I don't want to interrupt, but
your spaghetti's getting cold.
269
00:10:39,073 --> 00:10:40,988
When I asked for the lollipop,
he spit it out into my hand.
270
00:10:41,031 --> 00:10:42,729
You know, you guys
can eat and listen.
I've seen you do it.
271
00:10:42,772 --> 00:10:44,774
You know, I have seen students
produce fluids
272
00:10:44,818 --> 00:10:46,646
that made me
briefly consider
273
00:10:46,689 --> 00:10:48,648
that they might be
an alien species.
274
00:10:48,691 --> 00:10:49,823
The thing about spaghetti
is you want to eat it hot.
275
00:10:49,866 --> 00:10:51,999
Janine,
stop interrupting.
276
00:10:52,042 --> 00:10:53,957
You and Jacob did a good job yesterday.
277
00:10:54,001 --> 00:10:56,699
In 30 seconds,
everyone's gonna tell you so.
278
00:10:56,743 --> 00:10:58,483
Just let the man
finish his story.
279
00:10:58,527 --> 00:10:59,484
Mm-hmm.
280
00:10:59,528 --> 00:11:01,356
She said
I did a good job.
281
00:11:01,399 --> 00:11:03,053
The point is, Ava literally
made me take candy from a baby,
282
00:11:03,097 --> 00:11:05,882
and she didn't do anything
to discipline Micah at all.
283
00:11:05,926 --> 00:11:08,450
Oh, Ava doesn't
discipline the kids.
284
00:11:10,800 --> 00:11:12,541
So then why did you tell me
to send them to her?
285
00:11:12,584 --> 00:11:14,674
Remember when I said
you shouldn't do that?
286
00:11:14,717 --> 00:11:16,676
Look,
sending a kid to Ava
287
00:11:16,719 --> 00:11:18,416
just helps get them
out of the room
288
00:11:18,460 --> 00:11:20,375
so that you can regain control
of the rest of the class.
289
00:11:20,418 --> 00:11:23,683
But it doesn't fix the problem,
and rewarding bad behavior
290
00:11:23,726 --> 00:11:25,772
is the opposite of what
a principal should do, right?
291
00:11:25,815 --> 00:11:27,904
Oh, wait,
repeat what you just said,
292
00:11:27,948 --> 00:11:29,036
because for a second,
it sounded like
293
00:11:29,079 --> 00:11:30,951
you expect Ava
to do her job.
294
00:11:30,994 --> 00:11:33,388
What y'all doing
in here?
295
00:11:33,431 --> 00:11:35,390
Never mind.
I don't care.
296
00:11:39,176 --> 00:11:40,700
Say when.
297
00:11:40,743 --> 00:11:42,179
Discipline is an incredibly
important part
298
00:11:42,223 --> 00:11:43,746
of a child's development.
299
00:11:43,790 --> 00:11:46,401
When I was a kid,
if I did anything childlike--
300
00:11:46,444 --> 00:11:50,057
yell, run around, just generally
have a zest for life--
301
00:11:50,100 --> 00:11:51,623
I would be put on time out,
302
00:11:51,667 --> 00:11:53,016
and I would have to reckon
with the fact
303
00:11:53,060 --> 00:11:55,584
that I had committed
a failure of character.
304
00:11:55,627 --> 00:11:57,629
And that is how I became
the well-adjusted man
305
00:11:57,673 --> 00:11:58,935
that stands before you today.
306
00:11:58,979 --> 00:12:01,590
Barbara, when you talk to Ava,
she listens.
307
00:12:01,633 --> 00:12:03,940
Yes.
And you're the only one
in this whole school
308
00:12:03,984 --> 00:12:05,768
that can get her
to even remotely do her job.
309
00:12:05,812 --> 00:12:07,422
You got that right.
310
00:12:07,465 --> 00:12:08,771
You got this gift to just
see through her bull--
311
00:12:08,815 --> 00:12:10,555
Gregory,
what do you want?
312
00:12:10,599 --> 00:12:11,818
Ma'am, can you please get Ava
to discipline the kids?
313
00:12:11,861 --> 00:12:12,862
'Cause I'm here to teach,
not punish.
314
00:12:12,906 --> 00:12:14,777
I will talk with Ava,
315
00:12:14,821 --> 00:12:17,171
because this color
doesn't look good on you.
316
00:12:17,214 --> 00:12:19,739
I thought I looked nice today.
317
00:12:19,782 --> 00:12:22,916
Mr. Eddie, please report
to the principal's office.
318
00:12:25,788 --> 00:12:27,834
Alright.
319
00:12:27,877 --> 00:12:29,749
Turn around.
Come on.
320
00:12:29,792 --> 00:12:32,142
Students, turn around.
321
00:12:32,186 --> 00:12:35,058
Ooooooh.
322
00:12:35,102 --> 00:12:36,930
Alright, now,
enough of that.
323
00:12:36,973 --> 00:12:40,934
We do not kick somebody
when they are down.
324
00:12:43,588 --> 00:12:45,721
- You wanted to see me?
- Why, yes, Mr. Eddie.
325
00:12:45,765 --> 00:12:46,983
I did.
326
00:12:47,027 --> 00:12:48,985
Though, ideally not under
these circumstances.
327
00:12:50,117 --> 00:12:51,858
Don't make that face.
328
00:12:51,901 --> 00:12:53,816
I heard you're going
around complaining
about my principaling.
329
00:12:53,860 --> 00:12:55,731
Now, I've made it a point
not to "harass" you
330
00:12:55,775 --> 00:12:57,602
these past few weeks
and this is how you repay me?
331
00:12:57,646 --> 00:12:59,126
Ava, you do these kids
a disservice
332
00:12:59,169 --> 00:13:02,129
by not being the strong
authority figure that they need.
333
00:13:02,172 --> 00:13:04,218
Kids are supposed to be scared
to go to the principal's office.
334
00:13:04,261 --> 00:13:06,089
You turned it into
a Chuck E. Cheese.
335
00:13:06,133 --> 00:13:07,830
Don't say that.
336
00:13:07,874 --> 00:13:09,658
I got beef with every
Charles Entertainment Cheese
337
00:13:09,701 --> 00:13:11,094
in the greater
Philadelphia area.
338
00:13:11,138 --> 00:13:12,269
Can I go?
339
00:13:12,313 --> 00:13:13,923
Have you not
embarrassed me enough?
340
00:13:13,967 --> 00:13:15,751
Now, how do you think it feels
for a six or seven year old
341
00:13:15,795 --> 00:13:17,057
to make
that walk of shame?
342
00:13:17,100 --> 00:13:18,232
By the time they get
to my office,
343
00:13:18,275 --> 00:13:19,842
they got snot
running down their face
344
00:13:19,886 --> 00:13:21,844
and they're shaking
like a Chihuahua, and what?
345
00:13:21,888 --> 00:13:23,280
I'm supposed to punish them?
And then what?
346
00:13:23,324 --> 00:13:24,804
I gotta tune out
some sobbing child
347
00:13:24,847 --> 00:13:26,806
while I'm trying to watch
"Below Deck"?
348
00:13:26,849 --> 00:13:28,111
If you don't agree with
my approach,
349
00:13:28,155 --> 00:13:30,505
you need to get Micah
under control on your own.
350
00:13:31,985 --> 00:13:34,074
I'm sending Mr. Eddie
back to his class.
351
00:13:34,117 --> 00:13:35,989
Let's all hope
he's learned his lesson.
352
00:13:38,121 --> 00:13:40,515
I got next game.
353
00:13:41,124 --> 00:13:45,607
Shame.
354
00:13:45,650 --> 00:13:48,740
This is a 2021,
uh, white,
355
00:13:48,784 --> 00:13:51,874
and this $10 dandy
has hints of metal--
356
00:13:51,918 --> 00:13:53,876
Oh, God, would you shut
the hell up about the wine?
357
00:13:53,920 --> 00:13:55,138
Mm-hmm.
358
00:13:55,182 --> 00:13:56,836
Janine, could you get that, please?
359
00:13:56,879 --> 00:13:58,054
- Mm-hmm.
- It's probably one
of my neighbors
360
00:13:58,098 --> 00:13:59,534
thinking you're
an interracial couple
361
00:13:59,577 --> 00:14:01,841
trying to gentrify
the neighborhood.
362
00:14:01,884 --> 00:14:04,191
Oh, Kristin Marie!
363
00:14:04,234 --> 00:14:06,236
Do I know you,
Bilbo Baggins?
364
00:14:06,280 --> 00:14:07,672
Where's Melissa?
365
00:14:07,716 --> 00:14:10,632
โช Chase the blues away
366
00:14:10,675 --> 00:14:11,851
Let me catch you up.
367
00:14:11,894 --> 00:14:13,548
I made the sacred
Schemmenti gnocchi,
368
00:14:13,591 --> 00:14:14,941
dropped it off
at her school with a note
369
00:14:14,984 --> 00:14:17,117
implying it's from Melissa,
and now...
370
00:14:17,160 --> 00:14:20,207
โช Reunited
and it feels so good โช
371
00:14:23,036 --> 00:14:24,907
Are you trying
to [bleep] poison me?
372
00:14:29,216 --> 00:14:30,695
Poison? You know I would never
poison anybody.
373
00:14:30,739 --> 00:14:33,829
If I'm taking someone out,
I wanna watch 'em go.
374
00:14:33,873 --> 00:14:37,572
The hell are you doing
in my house, you pazzo lunatic?
375
00:14:37,615 --> 00:14:38,834
You know exactly
what I'm doing here.
376
00:14:38,878 --> 00:14:41,228
You show up at my place
of employ
377
00:14:41,271 --> 00:14:43,752
trying to mock me
via food.
378
00:14:43,795 --> 00:14:45,885
What the hell are you
talking about?
379
00:14:45,928 --> 00:14:47,060
If Nana knew
you'd made this,
380
00:14:47,103 --> 00:14:48,713
she'd be turning over
in her urn.
381
00:14:48,757 --> 00:14:51,978
If Nana knew you made her
gnocchi with red potatoes,
382
00:14:52,021 --> 00:14:55,111
that urn would be
a [bleep] sandstorm.
383
00:14:55,155 --> 00:14:59,115
The store
was out of russets.
384
00:14:59,159 --> 00:15:01,378
Alright,
- enough of that!
- I don't like confrontation.
I'm-- yeah.
385
00:15:01,422 --> 00:15:02,989
- Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob.
- You know what? I'm really glad
I came by, actually,
386
00:15:03,032 --> 00:15:05,382
because you're clearly--
you're losing your mind.
387
00:15:05,426 --> 00:15:08,385
What, you're l-- you're letting
cameras in your house.
388
00:15:08,429 --> 00:15:10,213
Forgetting
you dropped-off food.
389
00:15:10,257 --> 00:15:13,129
You know, I thought about
giving this crap to my dog,
390
00:15:13,173 --> 00:15:15,740
but I love my dog, so...
391
00:15:15,784 --> 00:15:17,220
I would say that comment
was pretty hurtful.
392
00:15:17,264 --> 00:15:21,703
I couldn't make food
that disgusting if I tried.
393
00:15:21,746 --> 00:15:24,010
That, too.
394
00:15:24,053 --> 00:15:25,054
Yeah? If you didn't do it,
then how else did this
395
00:15:25,098 --> 00:15:26,055
gnocchi-shaped Play-Doh
396
00:15:26,099 --> 00:15:27,230
end up in my classroom
397
00:15:27,274 --> 00:15:28,318
with a note... Oh.
398
00:15:28,362 --> 00:15:31,626
...that said,
"For my sister"?
399
00:15:32,801 --> 00:15:34,020
Huh.
400
00:15:34,063 --> 00:15:35,064
- Everybody out.
- Mm-hmm.
401
00:15:35,108 --> 00:15:36,065
Get out.
402
00:15:36,109 --> 00:15:38,633
Wow.
Not even an apology
403
00:15:38,676 --> 00:15:41,244
for trying to snuff out
your own sister.
404
00:15:41,288 --> 00:15:43,246
Real nice, Schemmenti.
405
00:15:45,335 --> 00:15:46,641
Oops.
406
00:15:46,684 --> 00:15:48,773
Hang on. Wait.
Let me just--
407
00:15:48,817 --> 00:15:51,124
Let me just say one thing to you
before you go, okay?
408
00:15:53,082 --> 00:15:54,692
Your roots
are growing in.
409
00:15:56,999 --> 00:15:58,740
That's enough.
410
00:15:58,783 --> 00:16:00,133
Make your voice deeper.
411
00:16:00,176 --> 00:16:01,395
Since Ava refuses to do
another one
412
00:16:01,438 --> 00:16:03,092
of the integral functions
of her job,
413
00:16:03,136 --> 00:16:05,442
I have to take on
this additional duty.
414
00:16:05,486 --> 00:16:08,141
I plan to exceed expectations.
415
00:16:08,184 --> 00:16:10,273
Of which there are none.
416
00:16:10,317 --> 00:16:11,971
'Cause this isn't my job.
417
00:16:12,014 --> 00:16:13,146
That's enough.
418
00:16:13,189 --> 00:16:14,234
Deeper.
419
00:16:14,277 --> 00:16:16,758
That is enough.
420
00:16:16,801 --> 00:16:18,803
My work here is done.
421
00:16:18,847 --> 00:16:20,283
Hm.
Enough. Enough.
422
00:16:20,327 --> 00:16:22,024
Enough.
423
00:16:23,460 --> 00:16:25,201
Just stopping by to see
how things are going
424
00:16:25,245 --> 00:16:26,768
since your conversation
with Ava.
425
00:16:26,811 --> 00:16:28,117
Terribly.
426
00:16:28,161 --> 00:16:29,379
I can't think of any other way
to get Micah to focus
427
00:16:29,423 --> 00:16:31,033
other than to break out
my dad voice.
428
00:16:31,077 --> 00:16:34,254
Well, did your dad's
dad voice work on you?
429
00:16:34,297 --> 00:16:35,864
I'd say it did.
430
00:16:35,907 --> 00:16:38,171
Working here at Abbott
as a young Black man,
431
00:16:38,214 --> 00:16:40,260
you are in
a unique position.
432
00:16:40,303 --> 00:16:41,304
Mm.
433
00:16:41,348 --> 00:16:43,306
You are also
at a crossroads.
434
00:16:43,350 --> 00:16:45,352
Now, I am not saying
that discipline
435
00:16:45,395 --> 00:16:47,832
does not have its place,
436
00:16:47,876 --> 00:16:49,834
but your students
can either fear you
437
00:16:49,878 --> 00:16:52,315
or they can respect you.
438
00:16:52,359 --> 00:16:53,969
You can't have both.
439
00:16:54,926 --> 00:16:56,972
It's possible I'd forgotten
what all that discipline
440
00:16:57,016 --> 00:16:59,366
made me feel like as a kid.
441
00:16:59,409 --> 00:17:01,890
I'm starting to thinking that
maybe I didn't grow into the man
442
00:17:01,933 --> 00:17:05,067
I'm proud of because of it.
443
00:17:05,111 --> 00:17:06,895
Maybe I did in spite of it.
444
00:17:06,938 --> 00:17:09,289
Ooh,
Melissa is mad.
445
00:17:09,332 --> 00:17:11,247
I'm sure
she's not that mad.
446
00:17:14,424 --> 00:17:16,078
Yeah, she is.
That's her angry walk.
447
00:17:16,122 --> 00:17:17,732
Look at her,
not bending her knees.
448
00:17:17,775 --> 00:17:18,950
Are you so bad
at reading body language
449
00:17:18,994 --> 00:17:20,778
because yours
are so small?
450
00:17:23,129 --> 00:17:24,086
Hey, Melissa?
451
00:17:24,130 --> 00:17:26,306
Hey.
I'm-- I'm sorry.
452
00:17:26,349 --> 00:17:28,482
I was just trying to fix your
relationship with your sister,
453
00:17:28,525 --> 00:17:30,832
not re-create an episode
of "The Sopranos."
454
00:17:30,875 --> 00:17:32,312
Is that offensive?
I haven't seen it.
455
00:17:32,355 --> 00:17:34,140
I don't know.
No, I knew
what I was risking
456
00:17:34,183 --> 00:17:36,838
when I invited you
over to the house.
457
00:17:36,881 --> 00:17:38,883
I brought this on myself.
458
00:17:38,927 --> 00:17:40,233
I don't want to undercut
my apology
459
00:17:40,276 --> 00:17:41,973
by over-explaining
my behavior...
460
00:17:42,017 --> 00:17:43,932
Sure you don't.
What is it, Janine?
461
00:17:43,975 --> 00:17:47,414
I have been missing my sister
a lot lately,
462
00:17:47,457 --> 00:17:49,416
and I can't imagine
having her down the street
463
00:17:49,459 --> 00:17:52,071
and not speaking to her
over a potato substitution.
464
00:17:52,114 --> 00:17:53,246
And I get that food's
important to you.
465
00:17:53,289 --> 00:17:55,509
It's not about the gnocchi, Janine.
466
00:17:55,552 --> 00:17:57,119
There are members
of my family
467
00:17:57,163 --> 00:17:59,426
that still have a vendetta
against her over that dish,
468
00:17:59,469 --> 00:18:02,168
but Kristin Marie left
my whole family high and dry
469
00:18:02,211 --> 00:18:03,778
when my nana got sick.
470
00:18:03,821 --> 00:18:05,388
She said, "Oh, I can't handle
seeing her like this,"
471
00:18:05,432 --> 00:18:07,129
and she just disappeared,
472
00:18:07,173 --> 00:18:10,524
and I was left to take care
of her by myself.
473
00:18:10,567 --> 00:18:12,091
And then she brings
a Tupperware
474
00:18:12,134 --> 00:18:13,788
full of hot garbage
to the funeral?
475
00:18:13,831 --> 00:18:15,485
That was just the nail
in the coffin.
476
00:18:15,529 --> 00:18:17,400
Metaphorically.
Nana was cremated.
477
00:18:17,444 --> 00:18:19,794
I miss
seeing her though.
478
00:18:19,837 --> 00:18:22,405
It was nice to have fun
with her like that again.
479
00:18:22,449 --> 00:18:23,928
Really?
480
00:18:23,972 --> 00:18:25,278
Yeah, ya know. Family.
It's complicated.
481
00:18:26,627 --> 00:18:28,803
Yeah,
that is for sure.
482
00:18:28,846 --> 00:18:30,239
Yeah.
483
00:18:30,283 --> 00:18:32,546
I wish my mom taught me
how to cook.
484
00:18:32,589 --> 00:18:34,852
Hey.
485
00:18:34,896 --> 00:18:36,376
Why don't you and me
make some time
486
00:18:36,419 --> 00:18:38,465
to do another
cooking lesson, alright?
487
00:18:38,508 --> 00:18:40,336
So you don't hurt someone.
488
00:18:40,380 --> 00:18:41,816
Okay?
489
00:18:41,859 --> 00:18:43,209
Oh, and no Jacob.
He's not invited.
490
00:18:44,862 --> 00:18:47,038
Oh, I-I'm not invited?
491
00:18:47,082 --> 00:18:50,433
Now, our ice cube melted
and then turned into water,
492
00:18:50,477 --> 00:18:54,133
but we left that water in
the sun, and then it evaporated.
493
00:18:54,176 --> 00:18:55,438
Now, does anyone know--
494
00:19:01,009 --> 00:19:03,185
Bluey!
495
00:19:03,229 --> 00:19:04,491
Huh? What?
496
00:19:04,534 --> 00:19:05,492
What was that, Bluey?
497
00:19:05,535 --> 00:19:07,146
Uh-huh. Yeah.
498
00:19:08,930 --> 00:19:10,323
Bluey, you so crazy.
499
00:19:10,366 --> 00:19:12,194
Oh, Bluey is so funny.
500
00:19:12,238 --> 00:19:14,457
But she said that she knows
what state
501
00:19:14,501 --> 00:19:15,893
the evaporated water is in.
502
00:19:15,937 --> 00:19:17,330
Does anyone else?
503
00:19:18,287 --> 00:19:19,984
Okay, Micah, come on up.
504
00:19:20,028 --> 00:19:22,596
Now you know
he don't know.
505
00:19:23,684 --> 00:19:29,516
Okay, now, is the water a solid,
a liquid, or a gas?
506
00:19:33,302 --> 00:19:35,261
Enh! Wrong.
507
00:19:35,304 --> 00:19:36,479
Not quite, buddy.
508
00:19:36,523 --> 00:19:38,002
But that's okay.
509
00:19:38,046 --> 00:19:40,091
Thank you for trying.
510
00:19:40,135 --> 00:19:42,181
Now, does anybody else
want to give it a go?
511
00:19:43,356 --> 00:19:46,054
Mr. Eddie, you didn't send
anyone to my office today.
512
00:19:46,097 --> 00:19:48,274
Oh, I feel like I got
the situation under control.
513
00:19:48,317 --> 00:19:50,276
Well, you know you don't need
a misbehaving student
514
00:19:50,319 --> 00:19:51,494
to stop by my office.
515
00:19:51,538 --> 00:19:53,235
You could always
just come say hi.
516
00:19:53,279 --> 00:19:55,672
And I'd have to be high
- to do that.
- Oop.
517
00:19:55,716 --> 00:19:57,457
- Come on.
- Unh-unh.
518
00:19:57,500 --> 00:19:59,023
I don't like this little duo
at all.
519
00:19:59,067 --> 00:20:00,547
Oh, Ava,
520
00:20:00,590 --> 00:20:03,550
I forgot to drop off
that discipline report to you.
521
00:20:03,593 --> 00:20:05,247
You are no longer speaking
to work Ava.
522
00:20:05,291 --> 00:20:07,554
You can drop it off at her desk
or speak to her tomorrow.
523
00:20:07,597 --> 00:20:10,339
How dare you. Oop.
524
00:20:30,707 --> 00:20:33,057
What up, Pops?
525
00:20:35,190 --> 00:20:37,279
Yeah, of-- of course.
Of course.
526
00:20:37,323 --> 00:20:39,368
I'm sorry,
Lt. Colonel Father Sir.
527
00:20:42,937 --> 00:20:45,679
Mm. So, this one was where
Kristin Marie
528
00:20:45,722 --> 00:20:48,247
and I went to Disney World,
and if you look real close,
529
00:20:48,290 --> 00:20:50,292
you can see there's a bump
on my forehead
530
00:20:50,336 --> 00:20:52,294
where she slammed the door
in my face.
531
00:20:52,338 --> 00:20:55,166
Oh, this one--
this is a sad day.
532
00:20:55,210 --> 00:20:58,692
So this was when Kristin Marie
had to say goodbye to her cat.
533
00:20:58,735 --> 00:21:01,260
She had the name changed
legally to Melissa
534
00:21:01,303 --> 00:21:03,174
right before she put it down.
535
00:21:03,218 --> 00:21:05,176
So...
536
00:21:05,220 --> 00:21:06,177
Whoop!
537
00:21:06,221 --> 00:21:07,701
This one's very special.
538
00:21:07,744 --> 00:21:11,270
This is me on Kristin Marie's
wedding day.
539
00:21:12,445 --> 00:21:14,621
Oh, see, look-- look at this.
540
00:21:14,664 --> 00:21:17,145
Look how nice we used
to get along.
541
00:21:22,629 --> 00:21:23,586
Excuse me.
37534
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