All language subtitles for The Flying Nun s03e08 A Convent Full of Miracles.eng

♪♪

[barking]

♪♪

[narrator] Some people think
the age of miracles is past,

but don't you believe it.

For instance,
take our Convent of San Tanco.

If it was in better shape,

they'd declare it
a disaster area.

But it still hangs together,
sort of.

Sister Bertrille,

will you say the grace tonight,
please?

Yes, Reverend Mother.

Dear Lord--

[raindropspattering]

[groans]

[narrator] We have a saying
at the convent,

anything that can go wrong
will.

Continue, please,
Sister Bertrille.

Dear Lord...

As you were saying,
Sister Bertrille.

Dear Lord...

[yells]

Oh, Lord.

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

[rain pattering]

[narrator] Altogether, it's a miracle

the convent hasn't collapsed
on our heads.

But it turned out
even more powerful miracles

were in store for us.

[engine sputtering]

What's that?

Sounds like
our old station wagon.

[chuckles]
Maybe somebody's stealing it.

Oh.
[all laugh]

[knocks on door]

Sister Angela.
[Sister Angela] Mm.

Would you please go
and see who's at the door?

Look at that old heap.
[chuckles]

Yes, he's very vulnerable.

That's venerable.
Oh.

It broke down,
so it's also vulnerable.

Whatever that means.

I am sorry to intrude, Sisters,
but my car broke down.

If I could use your phone,
please?

Of course, but I'm afraid
it's much too late

to get a mechanic,
señor...

Baldazon. Alonzo Baldazon.

Señor Baldazon.

I am
Reverend Mother Placido.

Oh. Very nice.

[chuckles]
Nice to meet you.

Welcome.
Hello.

Would you care
to have something to eat?

Well,
I don't like to make trouble.

Oh, please do.
We have lots of food.

That is if you dig
crispy crunchy roast beef.

[chuckles]

This is good. Mm.

Are you from San Juan,
señor?

Oh, I'm from everywhere.

San Juan, Rio,
Paris, Greece.

Oh, regular ball runner.

I beg your pardon.
I think she means globe-trotter.

[Baldazon] Oh, yeah.

And what is your profession,
Señor Baldazon?

Well, I do a little bit of this,
a little bit of that.

This is so good.

I mean, look at him eat.

He's practically biting
the plate.

I bet it tastes better
than the beef. Heh.

Now I'm full. Heh.

[Jacqueline laughs]

But...

[sighs]

I still have to figure out
what to do with the car.

Señor Baldazon.

It is still raining
very hard out now.

Why don't you stay here
for the night?

You are very kind.
Please stay.

Tomorrow we'll get
someone to fix your car.

I accept
your kind suggestion.

But I insist on making
a contribution to the convent.

Oh, Señor Baldazon,
that is not necessary.

Oh, it is also not possible.

As usual, I'm without cash.

But I will send a check
tomorrow, huh?

Great.

♪♪

[knocks on door]

I'm coming.

Oh.
I brought you

some bicarbonate
and cookies.

Oh.

[laughs]

Thank you. Thank you.
Gracias.

[chuckles]

Bicarbonate.

[laughing]

Well, good night, Sister.

Good night. Um...

Señor Baldazon, you said
you did a little bit of this

and a little bit of that.

Would that include gardening
or carpentry?

Whatever the occasion
requires.

Well, I don't know
how to say this,

but what with the rains
and all,

we could use help
in both departments.

Are you offering me a job,
Sister?

It's the Reverend Mother's idea.
She thought

perhaps you'd like to rest
after your traveling.

To do odd jobs?

It's
a very interesting proposition.

[laughs]

♪♪

[phone rings]
Hello?

[Alonzo] Hello, Maurice.
Señor Baldazon, where are you?

I could not find you
at the antique car rally.

No, no, no.
My antique turned into junk.

I am
at the Convent of San Tanco.

I will send a chauffeur at once.
No, no, Maurice.

I have decided to stay here
for a while.

At a convent?

Except for the leaky roof

and bad food,

it's a very pleasant place.

And full of opportunities.

Would you believe it?

They have offered me a job.
You, señor?

You think
that I'm unemployable?

No, no, no.
I did not mean that.

I hope not.

Maurice, in any case,

you are talking
to the new handyman.

Señor, you are joking.

Heh.
Oh, not at all, Maurice.

I foresee
a brilliant career ahead.

But you are needed here,
señor.

I just hung up on London.

Uniworld Chemicals
is waiting for you

to marry them
to Salvaron Industries.

They can continue to hold hands
for a while.

And Carlos Ramirez called
from the casino.

He expects you
at a midnight supper party.

Tell him I left suddenly.

For Canada,
to inspect some timberlands.

In fact, say that to anyone
who wants to reach me.

Señor, uh,
this is most irregular.

And delightful, Maurice.

What a refreshing experience
to find myself among people

who want nothing of me.

If you say so, señor.

Take my word for it,
Maurice.

It is better to receive
than to give.

And remember, I'm in Canada.

♪♪

[humming]
Good morning, Alonzo.

Good morning, Alonzo.

Oh, excuse me, Sister.
I didn't hear you.

Yes. Well, I made a list
of all the things

that need to be fixed.

Oh.

That's quite
an impressive document.

[chuckles]Sorry.

I guess it isn't only Satan

who finds work
for idle hands.

Well, don't worry.

I will fix everything.

If I live that long.

[both chuckle]

Good luck to you.
Thank you very much.

[laughing]

[humming]

Oh, I see you are at work
already.

Oh, yes. I enjoy gardening
very much. Smell it.

Oh.
People say I have a green thumb.

[chuckles]
Really?

Uh-huh.
Which one?

Oh, it's just an expression.
Ah. Si.

What is called
a finger of speech.

Oh, no, no, no, figure.

Oh.
Si.

But you said
you had a green thumb.

♪♪

[chuckles]

[hums]
[Bertrille] Help, Alonzo!

Hold on, Sister.
Try not to fall.

Quick, the ladder.

Oh, okay.

Hold on, Sister.

It always does that.
If you could sort of hold it

while I fix this light.
You can also use a new ladder.

We could use a new convent.
Oh.

[sister] Come, Alonzo.
Time for lunch.

Uh, go ahead.
I'm almost through.

I'll be along in a minute.

Okay. Okay.

[grunts]

Ooh.

What's for lunch?

Oh.

Sorry I asked.

It's the stove again.
It had a cookout.

No,
you mean it had a conk out.

Both.
The conk out brought the cook

out of the kitchen.
I think maybe I can fix it.

Oh, thank you. Great.

I know.

Well, what do you think?

I think you better administer
the last rites.

[Carlos] Hello. Where is everybody?

Oh.
We are in the kitchen, Carlos.

I better go outside
and check on the connection.

Oh, hello.

Hello, Sister Bertrille.

Hello, Carlos.
Good to see you.

You're just in time
not to have lunch.

Well,
that invitation I accept.

Well, I just came
to say hello.

I'm gonna talk
to the Reverend Mother.

While there,
might as well ask her

if she'd like to declare a day
of fasting.

Okay.
Bye.

It is hopeless. The stove
has given up the ghost.

How can we cook
for the children?

Where in heavens
can we find a new stove?

♪♪

Okay. Get going.
All right.

[Reverend Mother] Got it.

Careful now.
Ooh. Ooh. There you go.

[gasps]

Aah!

[all gasp]
It's a stove.

A new stove.

But whoever
did it come from?

From heaven.

It's a miracle.

Sister Ana,
that is not a word

we use lightly around here.

But it is a miracle.

I myself
heard Sister Bertrille

ask heaven for a new stove.

Well, I just mentioned it
in passing.

[Ana] Listen to her.
She's so modest.

So humbug.

Oh, I think you mean
"so humble," Sister.

Whatever I mean she is,
then I'm glad.

In any case,
this so-called miracle

left a note.

You see? It's from
whoever gave us the stove.

[Reverend Mother] How very strange.

Listen to this.

"Dear Reverend Mother,

many years ago,
you sheltered

this poor orphan boy
in the convent.

I promised myself when I grew up
I would repay your kindness."

Oh, heaven bless him.

"In time, I became a man

and I started
an automobile dealership

determined
to share my prosperity

with the convent."

[Sixto] Heaven bless him.

Alas, it went bankrupt.

"Still,
vowing to help the convent,

I opened a restaurant."

Aah! Heaven bless him.

Apparently, it didn't.
"It was a disaster.

Now
I am in the appliance business."

I didn't say nothing.

"It is doing very badly.

But I send you this stove
as a token of my gratitude."

Now you can say it,
Sister Sixto.

Heaven bless him. Heh.

[Jacqueline] Who's it from?

I can't read the signature.
But whoever it's from,

heaven blessed us.

We have a new stove.

Thanks to you,
Sister Bertrille.

It's a miracle.

Oh,
it was just a happy coincidence.

I think.

♪♪

♪♪

[narrator] And so, miracle or not,
the convent had a new stove.

We were still marveling
about it three days later

when our water heater
suddenly went whoosh.

Now, this wasn't one
of your fixable whooshes.

It was like a second flood
in the cellar.

Obviously, we needed
another miracle, and fast.

And would you believe it?

Next day, a truck drove
into the courtyard.

All right, amigos,
bring it down.

Bring it down.

Andale pronto.

Now, careful, careful.

Easy. Come on now.

Come on. Come on.

Stupidos.
I said bring, not bounce.

Señor, what are you doing?

Delivering-- Oh, heh,
delivering this water heater

to the convent San Tanco.

Oh, but we didn't order
a water heater.

Sister Bertrille,
you did it again.

No, I didn't.

I'm afraid
you have the wrong place, señor.

Rodriguez making
mistake?

Heh, never.

See? Here on my order pad.

One water heater
deliver to--

[chuckling]

A thousand pardons, Sisters.

Oh, well, for what?

Well, you see, that goes
to the Villa San Tanco.

You see?

Forgive me, good Sisters.

All right, amigos,
back up on the truck.

Andale pronto. Mucho--
Ay,no, no, no.

Wait, wait.
[Jacqueline] What now?

Eh, these clumsy stupidos

have damaged the water heater.
See?

I just see
a few knickknacks.

Nick, Sister.

Señor Valdez
of the Villa San Tanco,

he would fling this heater
right back in my face.

But why?
Oh.

He's the most finicky man
in all of Puerto Rico.

Once he refused a refund
because his name was misspelled.

Can't you sell it
to somebody else?

Rodriguez sell
damaged merchandise?

Never.

No, Sisters.

I'm afraid
I am stuck with it.

Oh, I'm sorry, señor.

Unless, perhaps you know
of someone who would accept,

free of charge, of course,
this poor battered water heater.

[Jacqueline] You wanna give this away?

[Rodriguez] I have no choice, Sister.

Well, as it happens,

well, we might be able
to find a place for it.

It is yours.
Bless you, Sister.

I will help carry it.

Gracias,amigo.

Sister Sixto...
Hmm?

...are you thinking what I am?
Si.

Now, cut that out.
I had nothing to do with this.

But the busted heater
crossed your mind.

Well, all I did
was wish we had a new one.

That was enough.

It is another miracle.

♪♪

Excuse me, Sister Bertrille.

We thought when you had time
you wouldn't mind

looking this over.
What is it?

Sister Sixto and I
have made a list

of things
the convent badly needs.

Why are you giving them to me?
We thought you might like

to take it up with the...
Now, let's not start that again.

See,
she's still the slinking violet.

That's shrinking.

And I tell you,
those miracles

have a perfectly natural
explanation.

Yes, Sister.

What is the explanation?

Well...

We'll leave the list anyway.

No. Now I don't wanna hear
another word

about those miracles.

Si,we understand.

When one is blessed
with such powers,

it's not something
to talk about.

Exactly.

I mean--
Well, if you'll excuse me.

Um, if we had to settle
for just one thing,

could it be the wading pool
for the children?

Is that thing leaking again?

Alonzo tried to patch it

with a tube
of rubber cement.

Now the tube is leaking.

Well, heh,
I do wish we had a new pool.

[chuckles]
Now you're talking.

I just wished.
I mean, who doesn't wish

we had a new pool?

[phone rings]

Hello?

Hello.

Is this San Tanco 4253?
Yes, it is.

Oh, this is radio station
WXXR is San Juan.

Congratulations.
By answering this phone call,

you have won our monthly bonus
lucky number contest.

I have?

Yes. And you have your pick

of the following
grand prizes.

A portable cocktail bar,

two glorious weeks
in Las Vegas,

a season pass
to the Mexico City bullfights,

or a king-sized
children's wading pool.

We take the wading pool.

Thank you, Sister Bertrille.

No, I--
Yes.

No--
You are a true miracle worker.

♪♪

Miracle worker?

[Bertrille] I never said it.

I should hope not.
It never entered my mind.

Well, I'm glad to hear that.

The pool
is another weird coincidence.

Exactly.
Which I had nothing to do with.

Certainly not.
Right.

Of course you must admit
it is kind of spooky.

Sister Bertrille.

But not miraculous.

I'm sure there's some

perfectly logical explanation
for all this.

Right, Sister Jacqueline?
Of course there is.

Of course there is.

What is it?

Beats me.

[knocks on door]

Come in.

Oh.
If I could fix the window.

Oh, yes. Yes, of course,
Señor Baldazon. Come, come.

Go right ahead.
Go right ahead.

Now, let us give this
some serious thought.

I say
that it is a coincidence.

I'll buy that. And the fact that
there are three coincidences

one right after the other
is another coincidence.

Right.
It doesn't bother me a bit.

It does me.

Me too.
Reverend Mother, you don't

believe she's a miracle work--
Of course not,

but somebody up in town
likes us.

Crazy about us.

So let us proceed
from that premise

and start with the stove.

Who outside the convent knew
about our stove problem?

Nobody.

Wait.

The day
the stove conked out,

Carlos came
through the kitchen

on his way to meet with you,
Reverend Mother.

Interesting.
He couldn't have known

about the busted heater.
Sister Jacqueline,

didn't you stop
by Señor Ramirez's office

that day to collect
for the used clothing drive?

Well, yes.
But I never mentioned a heater.

Ah. Except in passing.

Two down, one to go.

Wait a minute. Wait a minute.
The day I got

that so-called call
from the radio station,

I was in town
and I met Carlos,

and I said, "Do you remember
that wading pool you have--?"

Sisters,
I think we've got our man.

[Bertrille] Why is Carlos being sneaky?

Hmm.
Well, knowing Señor Ramirez,

may I suggest
a possible explanation.

Perhaps he was trying
to atone for some sin.

Well, he usually doesn't feel
he has to atone so hard.

I assure you, Sister,
my life is an open book.

More or less.
Yes, Carlos.

I'm as pure
as the driven snow.

To a certain extent.
Of course, Carlos.

Of course I'm only human.

But not so human that I have
to give the convent a stove,

a water heater,
and a wading pool.

Whatever you say, Carlos.

Then you do believe me.
Of course.

And I'll pray for you
twice a day.

Oh, no.
You object to that?

Not to the prayers.

It's the thought behind them
that bothers me.

Okay, good day.
Oh, Carlos.

Remember, if you ever
wanna talk things over,

I'll be right here.

♪♪

Revered Mother, good Sisters,
there is something

that I must tell you.
Yes, señor?

Perhaps if I was
a more saintly man

I wouldn't have to speak, but--
Please.

It's about
the so-called miracles.

Yes?
They were not performed

by Carlos.
You see, we were right.

It was Sister Bertrille.

Now cut that out.

No, it was not
Sister Bertrille either.

Then who was it?

It was me.

Oh.

As an expression of thanks
for your kindness.

Señor Baldazon, how could you
possibly have afforded

such expensive presents?

Especially
on what we pay you.

That is a good question
because from my appearance

you'd think
I was a poor soul.

You are poor
in worldly things only.

You are good and kind...

And exceedingly rich.

I have been called
one of the richest men

in South America.

Oh, well, that's terrific,
Alonzo.

Wonderful.

That's just great.

Good Sisters,
I have a feeling

that I'm not getting through
to you.

Oh, you are, Alonzo.
Si,you're the richest handyman

in South America.

Yes. No, not handyma-- Man.

But you came to us
as a handyman.

Well, that's very possible.

I mean, they make
very good wages nowadays.

You still don't believe me.

Very well,
I will prove it to you.

Here is a number, if I may.

This is the number
of my yacht

in the harbor.
Please ask for Alonzo Baldazon.

Señor, are you certain
that you want me to do this?

I insist.

Very well.
[chuckles]

[rotary dial whirring]

Hello?

Is this the yacht

of Señor Alonzo Baldazon?
Yes.

The rich South American?

Yes, yes, what do you wish?

Could you tell me
where I could reach him, please?

Oh, I'm afraid
that's impossible.

He is in Canada
on very important business.

I see.

Thank you.

Thank you very much.

Now, do you see?

What did he say?

Forgive us for doubting you,
señor,

and, uh, thank you
for all you've done.

♪♪

You are very welcome.

And now I must say goodbye.

Goodbye?
Yes. I'll have to be on my way.

I have told you before,
I'm a happy wanderer. Heh.

Goodbye, señor.

God bless you always.

Reverend Mother.

Goodbye.
Goodbye.

Goodbye.

That's from all of us.

[Ana] Goodbye, señor.

[Sisters] Goodbye. Goodbye.
Goodbye. Goodbye.

Goodbye, señor. Bless you.

Goodbye.

[chuckles]

So Alonzo
was really the miracle worker?

No, the real Alonzo Baldazon
is in Canada.

But he is such a sweet man.

Why not let him go on believing
what he wants to believe in?

That's not always very easy.

You know, once I had an aunt

who thought
she was a tea kettle.

Yes.

♪♪

♪♪

[Ana] Sister Bertrille,
Sister Bertrille.

Go on, kids.
Start without me.

Sister Bertrille,
we need you.

What now?
The washing machine broke down.

I don't know anything
about fixing a washing machine.

We know that, but we thought
you could arrange for a new one.

No.

You needn't pray for it.

Just wish a little.

Oh, Lord,
I've gotta get away from this.

♪♪

Hey, do you see what I see?

I don't believe it.

I don't believe it.

I'll keep your secret
if you keep mine.

That's what I call
a miracle.

♪♪

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