Original subtitles

- Shit.

- Everybody, gather round, please.

- Oh.

- Come on in.

- Oh, donuts.

You got hot ones?

- Yeah, they kinda got hot in my bag.

- And here comes the bride.

- Dearly beloved, we are gather here

in the presence of almighty God

and in the beautiful waters of Clump Beach.

Matrimony is a serious undertaking,

never to be entered into lightly.

- Hey, hey, hey, what's that in the water?

- It's the bridal party.

- No, over there.

- If any here assembled today have any objection,

speak now, or forever hold your...

- Crocodile! Crocodile!

Ah!

- What happened?

- A lizard took the reverend.

- Not another reverend.

- Third in two years.

- Good luck finding another one, Peter.

- We'll find one.

- Where?

- Fellas.

See you found a nice little slice of paradise.

- Hey, Michael.

- So wears Lorenzo then?

- Lorenzo sent me.

He wants a cease fire

as much as you do, okay?

And he's willing to pay for it.

- It's not an eye for an eye, but it the 21st century, right?

- All this for extinguishing the life of two of my boys?

- I know that it's a tough pill to swallow, Michael,

but this city doesn't need another war.

Just take the money. It'll all be over.

- You should listen to him, Michael.

- The hell is he doing here? - Let me take care of this.

Guido, what are you doing, man?

- Just cleaning up the last of the mess, you know?

- Guido, don't do anything stupid, okay?

Oh, come on.

Michael, I'll take care of this.

- Come on, man!

- Paulo. - Guido?

Let me get to your dad first, all right?

I can talk to him, I can fix this.

It's what I do.

- Oh, okay.

The great negotiator.

- All right, I'm coming out now, yeah?

- You're not gonna send me to heaven tonight, pal, okay?

- Oops! Sorry, Paulo.

Paulo?

Don't be shy.

Guess I really got you, huh?

Damn it!

- Who was it, Michael?

Who's got the money?

I can make this go away.

- Paulo.

- Lewis?

- Quiet night in, I see.

- I'm reading things didn't go to plan tonight.

- Yeah, you could say that.

I killed Guido Montemurro.

- Lorenzo's firstborn?

- Mm-hmm.

- I hope you have a better plan than hiding out here.

First place they would look.

- I know, Lou. I know.

I'm gonna just head out to O'Hare

and catch the first flight I can.

- Take these for the pain.

What's in the overnight bag?

- That would be $1.6 million of Lorenzo's money.

- How are you supposed to get that on the plane?

- Oh, I'll think of something.

I gotta go.

Thank you.

- Where will you go?

- I don't know.

The other side of the planet?

- All right. Hello.

Can I have everyone's attention please?

Can we all just gather round?

Tell me.

What is the biggest problem facing all of us at present?

- We can't keep a reverend alive for more than two months?

- Amy, respectfully, I am holding the speaker's dolphin.

- It's welded to your hand.

- I want to implant a vision.

If I can ask you all to come on a journey with me.

- "Clumpy Bay"?

- A resort?

- Hmm, sounds more like a skin condition.

- Who in their right mind would finance that?

The sugar mill just let off half its staff.

We can't even afford to fix the basketball ring.

- And who wants another Paradise Cove?

Botox and high-rise?

- Am I wrong to want to better this town?

To put Clump on the map?

'Cause if I am, just shoot me.

- Piper, can I borrow your gun please?

- Can we please talk about what this meeting

was meant to be about?

Thursday, our new minister, Reverend Mackenzie Boyd

and his good lady wife arrive here

all the way from Chicago.

- How do you know she's good?

- Because she's a minister's wife.

- I have a cousin in Chicago.

It reached -27 degrees in 1985.

- The church has combed the world to find this new man.

Reverend Mackenzie Boyd will be a lightning rod for this town.

- Ten to one says the new blokes dead

in two weeks. - Four weeks. Bull shark.

- One week. Jellyfish.

- Clump needs a lot more help

than a socially-challenged Bible geek.

- Can we please show some respect?

So what are our plans to officially welcome

the Reverend Mackenzie Boyd and his good lady wife

to our town?

- "Years of relentless, unbearable boredom...

"on a journey I must take alone.

With Greg."

Alone or with Greg? I mean, you can't...

You can't be both.

Good evening, ladies and gentlemen,

and welcome aboard Flight 88A

from Chicago to Australia's sunny Gold Coast.

I'll get back to you shortly

after we reach our cruising altitude

with an update.

- Oh, that'll have to be stowed overhead, sir.

Overhead is looking pretty full.

No problem. I'll take it up front.

- No, no.

Uh, I'm sorry.

It's just that I...

I have some medication that

I need to have access to it

during the flight, so I will find a place for it.

Thank you. - Right.

- Yep.

- Are you married, friend?

- No.

- A wise man. Neither am I.

I was an hour ago.

Wife just ditched me at the airport.

I'd like you to meet Charmaine.

She's the empty seat right beside you.

Nineteen years, yeah.

Leaves me with divorce papers and this letter.

Bon voyage!

- Sounds like a tough break. - Oh, no, no, no.

She's alone now.

With Greg.

Alone with Greg.

Greg, the used car salesman.

$300k a year, Greg.

Mind if I ask you a question?

Did you ever hear of a used car salesman

making $300,000 a year selling second hand Mitsubishis

and Ford Tauruses?

Oh, I apologize. Sorry about that.

How you doing there?

How are you? Mackenzie Boyd.

Are you religious at all, pilgrim?

- Not even a little bit.

- Mm, interesting.

- You mind? - I don't at all.

- I'm just looking for a little peace, so...

- Aren't we all?

But what gives us peace?

Right? I mean, that's the constant question of faith.

- No, that's wasn't a question.

- Do we believe, and, if so, what is it we believe?

In this moment, I...

couldn't quite tell you. "Too safe."

That's what she said to me. Me, safe?

Well, let me tell you something.

You see this right here? Oh, this right here.

This is what got in the way of the real me, the maverick.

Manly me.

Do you mind?

Cheers.

Do you need a license to drive a Harley?

Oh, hey, listen, rest up.

Plenty of time to talk.

You have blood on your shoulder.

Stop it.

Stop it right here, right now

I mean, there must be 20,000 hotels in this city,

and here we are. Are you kidding me?

What are the chances?

- I'm just waiting on my room.

- Hey. We're beating from the same drum.

These late check-ins, they are brutal.

I will leave you alone.

Can I get a whiskey? - Of course, sir.

No wife, no purpose, zero future,

all in the last 24 hours,

which is wild to me because I tried my whole life

to be a good man, and where does it get you?

Right? I mean, just devoted to God who doesn't give a...

cracker about me.

Is your family religious?

Not a family man.

Thank you.

You know what?

I'm not going to Clump.

That's my new parish.

It's a little pointy bit of a town in north Queensland.

And you know what I'm gonna do? I'm gonna head up there.

I'm gonna pick up all my things that were sent ahead.

The boxes and bags of a wasted life.

And then I'm gonna go.

'Cause what am I gonna tell my flock anyway, huh?

That there's a...

there's a loving God that smiles down on you

and takes care of you... - Hey, uh...

Can we check if my room's ready?

- Well, where is he? Huh?

Has anybody in here seen God hiding in the bathroom?

I'm sorry.

A little too loud.

- Mr. Keegan, room 2200 is ready for you.

- Great. - You know what? Uh...

We're on the same floor.

I'm room 2216.

What is the universe trying to tell us?

- Nothing.

The universe isn't telling you anything.

I mean, surely, you must've figured that out by now.

There is no God. There is no Savior.

No one's coming to help you.

You are...

alone.

So stop looking for God to give you something,

and go take it for yourself.

Hey, uh, let's, um... We're gonna do another round

for me and him.

And, uh...

Make it the good stuff.

To new freedom.

- To new freedom.

Thank you.

Hey, you wanna ding-dong ditch?

No, that's too loud.

No, no, we're just... we're two men who believe in freedom!

Got... got... no, no, no, come on, let me help you.

Let me help you. Let me help you.

- I'm fine. - No, you're fine. Okay.

You're fine, no, keep it up. Keep it up. You're doing great.

If you're fine, I am baby Jesus.

Gimme this, ready?

Ahh.

Ooh, scotch and painkillers, they are not a good combo,

so no more pills for the baby. - Ahh!

- Effective though, clearly.

Your key card is there, sir.

No, no, no, no, no pills. No pills.

No pills, come on. Tuck-tuck time.

Tuck-tuck time. Tuck-tuck time. Come on.

- What the hell?

No.

No. No.

No!

Mackenzie!

Mackenzie!

Mackenzie?

- Good morning, Father.

- Uh, right. Mackenzie Boyd, has he checked out yet?

- Um...

yes, we called him a taxi four hours ago.

- Do you have a cell number for him or something?

It's really important that I reach him.

- I'm afraid not.

- It appears his room's booked by a parish.

- Right, yes, that is the one in Clump.

- Oh!

- I'm so sorry, Father.

- No, no, no, no, it was entirely my fault.

- Do you know what he wants to do with his vehicle?

- That would be me.

They sent me here to drive it to Clump.

- Oh, you gotta be kidding me.

Do you know where Clump is?

- North. Very north.

- Right.

- See the ocean out there?

Keep it to your right and drive.

For three days.

- Daisy.

Daise?

- Cameron, turn that thing off.

- Oh, yeah.

- What are you doing?

- What? Nothing.

I just... oh, yeah,

I'm just doing my annual service on the bike, you know?

Breaks and steering. - What, here?

- Yeah. - In the manse?

He moves in tomorrow.

- Yeah, well, you know.

I figured that there's more room here.

Didn't wanna do it in my caravan.

- Workshop closed.

What happened to the front door?

- No idea.

- I don't... well, I think, uh...

I think it got sold.

You'll hose this place out

and replace the bloody front door.

Where's Daisy? - I don't know. No idea.

Why?

- Daise?

You can still stay here.

- Thanks, Pipe.

What's this new guy like?

- A lightning rod American.

- Ah, okay.

Lou, oh, thank God.

- Paulo?

Man, are you crazy?

You can't call me here.

Lou, I need your help, okay?

I got rolled. - You got rolled?

What the hell did I miss?

- I got ripped off.

Someone took the money.

- You're joking, right?

- He got everything.

It was the... the money, my cards, he took my clothes.

- They are turning Chicago upside down

looking for you.

- Yeah, look, I can get it back,

but I need just one tiny, little favor from you.

Okay, Lou? I'm gonna need you to help me track this asshole.

- What is his name?

- Mackenzie Boyd.

I'm never gonna forget that. He's a...

he's a reverend.

You're telling me you got robbed by a priest?

- He was having a crisis of faith.

- What's his cell?

- I don't have it yet, but I will soon.

- Where are you?

- I'm going to the place where he was supposed to go.

All his stuff is there,

so I'm sure that there's something there

that can help us find him.

All I need you to do is organize a trace, please?

- Of course, man.

When is the last time you slept?

- Money first, sleep later.

I'm fine.

- Take care, okay? - I will.

Hey, I appreciate you, brother.

- Yeah.

Ooh. Okay.

- Give me the bloody key, Amy.

You've swallowed it again, haven't you?

- Whoa! - What are you doing?

- Amy.

- I'm not missing this.

You were gonna arrest me anyway.

Save you a trip.

You're welcome. - Found that key pretty quick,

didn't you?

- How high do you want this?

- Oh, just show me first. Six feet, eight foot.

- All right, all right. It's coming up.

What are they playing, darling?

- Oh, I have absolutely no idea.

Uh, "Waltzing Matilda" here.

"Star-Spangled Banner." Does it really matter?

- It has to be perfect.

- When has this town ever done perfect?

And if you want perfection, don't look at that sign.

- That's not how you spell "reverend."

- I thought Rever was his wife's name.

- When will the people of this town

commit to the pursuit of excellence?

- We do other things well, Peter.

- It's like a disease, and it just keeps mutating.

- Calm down, darling.

- They're early.

It's him.

Okay, people. Everyone, ladders away!

This is not a rehearsal.

I repeat... Lester, get off the ladder!

Piper, what the...

Oh, Piper. You're driving very fast.

Shit!

Uh!

And...

- Oh, you way a ton.

- Oh, God.

- I'm happy to give him mouth-to-mouth if he needs it.

- Can you hear me? - Yeah.

- What day is it?

- Where?

Ah! Jeez!

- How does somebody who looks like that become a minister?

- Amy, he's married.

- I'm right here, guys.

- He can get divorced. He's not Catholic.

- Still right here.

- Reverend? Reverend, it's me, Peter.

Are you okay?

- I'm gonna need to see your license.

- Uh, um...

My license, right.

- You got it in your pocket? - Right, my license...

- Quit it, Amy.

- It got lost with all my luggage

on the flight over.

- Piper, Piper. - Peter.

- No. - I need to fill out a report.

So, no license? - No, no, I have one.

It's just not on my person.

- Then you're coming with me.

Let's go, Reverend. - What? No. No.

Piper!

- Anyone give me a hand?

- Hey, officer, is it really necessary

for me to sit in the back here?

Kind of making me feel like a criminal.

- Sorry. It's just protocol.

- Yeah, yeah, of course.

Um...

So how long have you been on the force?

- A few years now. I grew up around here.

- Oh, yeah?

It's, uh...

It's very pretty.

- It is.

Spectacular sometimes.

- Okay, what are we doing here?

- I need to process you.

- Process me how?

- I need to write an incident report

about your reckless driving endangering life.

And I thought perhaps you might prefer

that we do it at the station.

Just the two of us. Problem?

- Seriously?

- This won't take a minute.

- She's very quick.

Do this a hundred times.

- And blow one lovely long breath.

- Can we talk about this, please?

- Yes, of course we can.

But first, just your left thumb, please.

Just smudge that one.

- I have explained everything already.

- Father, forgive me, for I am full of sin.

Now I regret whole life.

The women, gambling, alcohol.

I want to change! - No.

No, hey, look, if you're trying to confess,

I'm not a...

Catholic priest.

I am not Catholic.

I just like to confess.

- Oh... - Really? A mugshot?

I am a church minister.

- And I'm a police officer,

and you're an unlicensed driver

who failed to pull over when I signaled

and fell asleep at the wheel. - I was jet-lagged.

You try being on the world's longest flight

followed by the world's longest drive.

- Followed by cutting off the power to an entire town.

Archil.

How long do I have to stay here?

- You can leave now.

Peter's waiting for you outside.

Welcome to Clump.

- O... kay.

- Reverend?

Reverend, I am beyond mortified,

and I only hope you can find it in your heart

to forgive this town,

to be treated like a common criminal

when you're here to restore the moral compass.

It was like his betrayal in the garden of Gethsemane.

- Where's that?

- The Lord. The garden.

- Oh, yeah, no, exactly like that.

- The hearse is going to be okay.

A few dents. Still drivable.

Good news, I've rewired the CD player

and put the disc back in.

- Great.

Hey, where's my stuff?

- Waiting for you inside.

You have a lot to unpack. - Thanks.

- I am Peter.

Think of me as the rock

on which you may build your church.

Your support person 362 days a year.

- Right.

362?

- Cup Day, Wimbledon Final, and my wedding anniversary.

Oh, and if Australia play England

in the cricket, I might want a few hours off.

You'll join Helen and myself for casserole tonight,

and I will run you through your schedule.

- Yeah, no thanks. I'm really tired.

It's been a long, hard day. Hoorah.

- Well, when then?

Reverend? Reverend?

Look, Reverend, I know you'll be anxious

to meet everyone in your parish.

They are...

Ooh.

- Come on.

Let's see what we got here.

Eeny, meeny, miny, moe!

Okay.

Where are you, you little ferret?

- So is now a good time... - Oh, Jesus Christ!

How long have you guys been there?

- Not long.

- This is Charlotte, me fiancée.

- Hi. Chad's me fiancé too, but...

- Oh, yeah, I kinda worked out that math.

Uh, wh... What are you guys doing here?

- You're gonna marry us.

- Do you wanna hear our vows now?

- Uh...

No, no. Now's not really a great time for me.

How about you guys come back same time next week?

And I'll be a little bit more settled,

and I'll know that you're there.

- You's are marrying us Saturday.

Peter arranged it, but.

- But what?

- But nothing, but.

- Um...

Look, don't you think you guys are...

I don't know, maybe rushing this a little bit?

- This is our third go.

- At marriage? - At a wedding.

Last two ministers died on us. Tragic as.

- Yeah, not pretty, mate.

It's gotta be Saturday.

- I can't hold Chad off me much longer, but.

- Right, okay.

How about we do it tomorrow?

Yeah? You can come on by,

and we'll run through the whole thing,

and we'll make it real special.

But.

- But. - Yeah.

- Okay. - Okay.

- Thank you. - Cheers, Rev.

- Yeah, we'll see you lovebirds soon.

- Yeah, tomorrow. - Yeah!

- We know where to find you. - Whoo-hoo!

- Yeah, you do.

Wow.

Tax returns, receipts, uh...

Ah, resumé.

Found you.

Ohh, jackpot.

Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!

Yes!

Who are you?

- Daisy. - Hi, Daisy.

I'm not open for business yet.

- I live here.

- Excuse me? - It's unofficial.

- So you're squatting?

- Reverend Dawe used to let me when my dad's away.

- That is super nice of him.

Um, but no, not anymore.

You're gonna have to find a new place to sleep tonight

'cause I need to make a phone call.

- Um, the bell tower or the jetty at the end of the beach.

- Huh?

- If you wanna make a call, those are your only options.

- Great.

That's... that's... that's...

Thanks.

Don't touch my stuff.

- Lou, Lou, Lou, it got it, man!

I've got everything. Let's find this prick.

- I'm well. Thank you.

- I'm gonna send everything through.

It might take a minute. I've only got one bar.

- I'll make some calls,

but it's gonna take some time.

This ain't no Google search.

- Yeah, thanks, man.

I'm gonna call you from the road tomorrow, okay?

- Where are you going now?

- Back to civilization.

- Civilization is cameras and cops.

Look, the only way you gonna survive the next 24 hours

is to stay where you are.

I don't need...

Lou? - Paulo?

Hello?

- Lewis?

Lou? Lou.

- He's an enthusiastic customer.

- The bloke nearly died a couple of hours ago.

Ah!

- Ooh!

- Anyone got odds on him for earlier than a week?

- Okay. Okay.

Look, sorry everybody. It's church business.

Yep. Okay. There we go.

Thanks, man.

You are a dead man.

- Paulo Keegan, my friend.

- I've got your whole life story, every name.

Every person. There is no place you can hide from me.

- I want you to know, I don't feel great

about what I did.

I mean, I think we really got along.

Honestly, we connected. - Okay.

- And I did not set out to steal from you, okay?

But your talk of freedom, it was just so rallying.

You have a gift.

- Yeah, okay, well, I'll tell you what.

If you come to Clump right now with the money,

there is a chance that I won't kill you.

- Wait a second, are you in Clump?

You are, you're at the church.

That's how you know all this information, Paulo.

This is so great, yes!

You're me, and I'm you.

Ha!

- I am gonna hunt you down, and I will find you.

- Well, actually, you know what you sound like?

Yes, you sound like Liam Neeson.

Oh, in that movie "Taken."

You know, Paulo, I was thinking,

we just might be each other's angels.

- Okay. - Think about it.

We meet, you and I,

at pretty terrible points in our lives,

but because we met, we've been given this golden opportunity

to reinvent ourselves.

Maybe there is a God after all.

- Well, if there is, you better make peace with him

because there is not place on Earth I won't find you

and kill you.

A new car?

Are you kidding me?

Excuse me.

God! Come on!

- I'm very sorry for you loss, Lorenzo.

Guido was...

Such a great kid.

- He was a spoiled idiot.

He had no business being there in the first place.

We can't even have an open casket.

His head looks like a cracked watermelon.

Any word on Paulo?

- Checked his apartment.

His stuff is there,

but his passport's gone.

- Shame.

I always like Paulo.

Smart guy.

Probably wasn't even his fault.

But Guido is my son.

- He'll have fled the country by now.

- So check everyone on our payroll.

Police, officials, airport.

Doesn't matter what dark hole Paulo's crawled into,

his head will pop up for air.

And when it does,

you will be there to cut it off.