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1
00:00:08,567 --> 00:00:11,234
Okay, you make this shot,
you buy me lunch.
2
00:00:11,334 --> 00:00:15,167
No, no. I make this shot,
I win. You buy me lunch.
3
00:00:15,267 --> 00:00:18,167
No. I'm saying if you
make it, you buy me lunch.
4
00:00:18,267 --> 00:00:21,167
I got to make you lunch?
Buy. If you make it.
5
00:00:21,267 --> 00:00:24,100
Why would I do that?
If I make it, I win.
6
00:00:24,200 --> 00:00:26,234
Big talk.
Let's see ya
back it up.
7
00:00:26,334 --> 00:00:28,267
Well, just let me
do the shot.
8
00:00:32,567 --> 00:00:34,334
Okay, I didn't make it.
9
00:00:34,434 --> 00:00:36,334
Who buys who lunch?
10
00:00:36,434 --> 00:00:39,367
I'll buy you lunch,
you buy mine.
11
00:00:42,367 --> 00:00:46,067
* You can tell me that
your dog ran away *
12
00:00:46,167 --> 00:00:49,801
* Then tell me that it
took three days *
13
00:00:49,901 --> 00:00:55,067
* I've heard every joke,
I've heard every one you say *
14
00:00:55,167 --> 00:00:59,133
* You think there's
not a lot goin' on *
15
00:00:59,234 --> 00:01:02,968
* Look closer, Baby,
you're so wrong *
16
00:01:03,067 --> 00:01:06,567
* And that's why you can
stay so long *
17
00:01:06,667 --> 00:01:11,400
* Where there's not a lot
goin' on *
18
00:01:12,634 --> 00:01:14,667
Here. We're returning
this movie.
19
00:01:14,767 --> 00:01:18,167
Yeah? How did you enjoy...
Blood of the Cursed?
20
00:01:18,267 --> 00:01:19,767
What kinda movie is that?
21
00:01:19,868 --> 00:01:22,133
It's hard to tell.
The title's so ambiguous.
22
00:01:22,234 --> 00:01:23,834
I know what kind it is.
23
00:01:23,934 --> 00:01:26,000
I didn't know my parents
liked slasher movies.
24
00:01:26,100 --> 00:01:28,667
Oh, I like a little scare
every now and then,
25
00:01:28,767 --> 00:01:30,601
that's not marriage related.
26
00:01:30,701 --> 00:01:34,133
Stupid movie. Buncha kids
camping in a haunted house.
27
00:01:34,234 --> 00:01:36,300
How would you know?
You were asleep.
28
00:01:36,400 --> 00:01:37,834
I read the box.
29
00:01:37,934 --> 00:01:40,000
I love the part where
they're making out
30
00:01:40,100 --> 00:01:42,434
and the killer sneaks up
behind him
31
00:01:42,534 --> 00:01:45,901
and digs a meat hook
into the guy's chest,
32
00:01:46,000 --> 00:01:48,300
and then it comes out
through the girl's neck.
33
00:01:48,400 --> 00:01:49,634
Bo-ring.
34
00:01:49,734 --> 00:01:51,234
Horror movies are stupid.
35
00:01:51,334 --> 00:01:53,300
Name one good horror
movie you've seen.
36
00:01:53,400 --> 00:01:54,300
I can't.
37
00:01:54,400 --> 00:01:55,934
See? They're all stupid.
38
00:01:56,033 --> 00:01:57,767
No, I've just never seen one.
39
00:01:57,868 --> 00:02:00,367
Oh, you haven't lived
until you've seen power tools
40
00:02:00,467 --> 00:02:02,634
cut a teenager in half.
41
00:02:02,734 --> 00:02:04,300
I took shop class.
42
00:02:04,400 --> 00:02:05,801
That's pathetic.
43
00:02:05,901 --> 00:02:09,267
You never took a girl to a
drive-in to see a scary movie?
44
00:02:09,367 --> 00:02:11,567
Yeah. But I didn't
see the movie,
45
00:02:11,667 --> 00:02:13,300
if you know what I mean.
46
00:02:17,834 --> 00:02:19,234
Sorry that took so long.
47
00:02:19,334 --> 00:02:21,033
They kept running
out relish.
48
00:02:21,133 --> 00:02:22,801
What did I miss?
49
00:02:22,901 --> 00:02:24,534
The movie.
50
00:02:25,067 --> 00:02:28,100
And the rest is none
of your beeswax.
51
00:02:28,200 --> 00:02:30,434
He's not the kind
to burp and tell.
52
00:02:34,801 --> 00:02:36,334
I can't believe it.
53
00:02:36,434 --> 00:02:39,100
In my own restaurant,
right under my nose.
54
00:02:39,200 --> 00:02:41,467
My jacket is gone.
55
00:02:41,567 --> 00:02:43,601
I was here the whole time,
eatin' lunch.
56
00:02:43,701 --> 00:02:45,267
Davis?
57
00:02:45,367 --> 00:02:47,934
The sandwich is great. Thanks.
58
00:02:48,033 --> 00:02:49,901
It was right over there.
59
00:02:50,000 --> 00:02:51,834
Sometimes the easiest
crimes to commit
60
00:02:51,934 --> 00:02:53,834
happen right in front
of your eyes.
61
00:02:53,934 --> 00:02:56,100
Makes you feel
like an idiot, huh?
62
00:02:56,200 --> 00:02:58,734
Davis, aren't you
going to do something?
63
00:02:58,834 --> 00:03:01,067
Whoa, hey, give
the man a break.
64
00:03:01,167 --> 00:03:04,033
He's in a high stress job.
He needs time to recharge.
65
00:03:04,133 --> 00:03:05,534
Oh, this sucks.
66
00:03:05,634 --> 00:03:08,601
You think you're safe because
you live in a small town.
67
00:03:11,434 --> 00:03:13,734
And then Karen
takes your jacket.
68
00:03:13,834 --> 00:03:16,467
Karen took my jacket?
69
00:03:16,567 --> 00:03:19,334
Who do you call when a
cop steals your stuff?
70
00:03:19,434 --> 00:03:21,534
Davis stole something?
71
00:03:21,634 --> 00:03:23,834
Two more bites
and I'm on it.
72
00:03:23,934 --> 00:03:27,067
Geez, Lacey, how come you're so
stingy with the fries?
73
00:03:27,901 --> 00:03:29,801
I'm sorry I took
your jacket.
74
00:03:29,901 --> 00:03:31,968
I had to run out
for a second.
75
00:03:32,067 --> 00:03:34,133
I didn't think
it was a big deal.
76
00:03:34,234 --> 00:03:37,334
Well, it wouldn't be, except
this jacket was a gift.
77
00:03:37,434 --> 00:03:39,701
I was with you
when you bought it.
78
00:03:39,801 --> 00:03:41,901
A gift to myself.
79
00:03:42,000 --> 00:03:44,400
You know, people who borrow
things usually ask first.
80
00:03:44,501 --> 00:03:47,033
It's called respect
between friends.
81
00:03:47,133 --> 00:03:48,901
Oh, you mean you and me?
82
00:03:49,000 --> 00:03:50,534
I thought we trusted
each other.
83
00:03:50,634 --> 00:03:51,868
We do.
84
00:03:51,968 --> 00:03:55,167
Enough that we can lend and
borrow things without asking.
85
00:03:56,000 --> 00:03:58,567
So I could borrow anything
of yours, anytime,
86
00:03:58,667 --> 00:04:00,534
no questions asked?
87
00:04:03,300 --> 00:04:04,968
By all means.
88
00:04:05,067 --> 00:04:08,567
Oh, I found your wallet
in your jacket pocket.
89
00:04:08,667 --> 00:04:10,367
I borrowed ten bucks.
90
00:04:13,000 --> 00:04:14,834
Afraid to watch
a scary movie.
91
00:04:14,934 --> 00:04:17,534
How could we raise
such a wimp?
92
00:04:17,634 --> 00:04:20,133
You know who I blame?
I blame myself.
93
00:04:20,234 --> 00:04:22,133
Oh. I was gonna blame
the hippies.
94
00:04:22,234 --> 00:04:24,601
But if you want to
take the rap, fine.
95
00:04:24,701 --> 00:04:28,667
It's not too late
to do the right thing,
turn our boy into a man.
96
00:04:28,767 --> 00:04:30,801
But I don't wanna
see a horror movie.
97
00:04:30,901 --> 00:04:33,267
Ditch your diapers, crybaby.
Time to become a man.
98
00:04:33,367 --> 00:04:34,767
I'm already a man.
99
00:04:34,868 --> 00:04:36,634
You're seeing the movie.
100
00:04:36,734 --> 00:04:38,067
Yes, Mom.
101
00:04:38,167 --> 00:04:40,000
You guys renting
a horror movie?
102
00:04:40,100 --> 00:04:41,667
Count me in.
103
00:04:41,767 --> 00:04:44,400
Are ya sure?
It'll make ya man.
104
00:04:44,501 --> 00:04:47,834
That's what they said about
tennis, and I turned out fine.
105
00:04:50,200 --> 00:04:51,701
Hey, sorry I took so long.
106
00:04:51,801 --> 00:04:54,100
It was under the
seat of my truck.
107
00:04:54,934 --> 00:04:56,634
I don't need
your cell phone.
108
00:04:56,734 --> 00:05:00,167
You were supposed to go get your
debit card and buy my lunch.
109
00:05:00,267 --> 00:05:01,767
Oh, right.
110
00:05:03,767 --> 00:05:05,567
It's out in my
truck somewhere.
111
00:05:05,667 --> 00:05:08,267
Why don't you carry a wallet,
like everyone else?
112
00:05:08,901 --> 00:05:11,567
Wow, you're right.
This solves all my problems.
113
00:05:11,667 --> 00:05:13,167
It sure does.
114
00:05:16,267 --> 00:05:19,801
Nah, I'm not really
a wallet guy.
115
00:05:19,901 --> 00:05:23,267
You were out there
rootin' around in your
truck for ten minutes.
116
00:05:23,367 --> 00:05:27,267
If you do that five times a day,
multiplied by 365 days,
117
00:05:27,367 --> 00:05:30,367
for 36 years,
you'd have wasted...
118
00:05:32,701 --> 00:05:35,067
12 years of your life.
119
00:05:35,167 --> 00:05:37,367
Twelve years?
Or is it 12 days?
120
00:05:37,467 --> 00:05:41,634
Wow, that's 12 years
I can't get back.
I don't think
I carried the four.
121
00:05:41,734 --> 00:05:43,767
That's birth to
grade six, gone.
122
00:05:43,868 --> 00:05:45,367
Well, grade five twice.
123
00:05:45,467 --> 00:05:48,501
Anyways, it's something
you should think about.
124
00:05:48,601 --> 00:05:50,901
Maybe I should park closer.
125
00:05:51,033 --> 00:05:52,968
Think more about it.
126
00:05:53,067 --> 00:05:54,033
Yeah, okay.
127
00:05:54,133 --> 00:05:55,300
Now,
128
00:05:55,400 --> 00:05:57,334
about lunch.
129
00:05:57,434 --> 00:05:59,167
We just ate.
130
00:06:00,100 --> 00:06:03,334
Maybe as a child you had a scary
experience you're suppressing.
131
00:06:03,434 --> 00:06:05,501
Maybe. You've met my dad, right?
132
00:06:05,601 --> 00:06:06,634
True.
133
00:06:06,734 --> 00:06:08,501
Maybe we should go
with somethin' light.
134
00:06:08,601 --> 00:06:10,834
Ah, how about this?
135
00:06:10,934 --> 00:06:12,868
Scream Fest is light?
136
00:06:12,968 --> 00:06:15,000
What is it, a romantic romp?
137
00:06:17,000 --> 00:06:18,601
How about Hell Train?
138
00:06:18,701 --> 00:06:21,434
A buncha people trapped
on a possessed train.
139
00:06:21,534 --> 00:06:23,334
Based on a true story.
140
00:06:23,434 --> 00:06:26,400
Satan's locomotive?
141
00:06:26,501 --> 00:06:27,634
Ah,
142
00:06:27,734 --> 00:06:29,801
Dr. Murder Blood?
143
00:06:29,901 --> 00:06:33,067
Is that the sequel to
Mr. Murder Blood Goes
to Medical School?
144
00:06:33,167 --> 00:06:35,534
You really don't
want to do this, do you?
145
00:06:35,634 --> 00:06:37,033
Hey, Garfield.
146
00:06:37,133 --> 00:06:38,834
All right.
147
00:06:42,100 --> 00:06:45,000
Whoa, check out
Mr. Pockets.
148
00:06:45,100 --> 00:06:47,567
What you said earlier
really opened my eyes.
149
00:06:47,667 --> 00:06:51,033
No more storin' stuff in
my truck, no more wasted time.
150
00:06:51,133 --> 00:06:54,300
If Batman wore pants, these
would be the pants he'd wear.
151
00:06:54,400 --> 00:06:55,968
Batman would
never wear pants.
152
00:06:56,067 --> 00:06:58,167
I've got a pocket
for my cell phone.
153
00:06:58,267 --> 00:06:59,667
Uh, my flashlight's
down here.
154
00:06:59,767 --> 00:07:01,167
There's even a secret pocket.
155
00:07:01,267 --> 00:07:02,767
Oh, yeah? Where's that?
156
00:07:02,868 --> 00:07:06,234
It's right... oh.
Ho-ho-ho, ya almost got me.
157
00:07:06,334 --> 00:07:07,767
Okay, no, no.
158
00:07:07,868 --> 00:07:09,667
Anything ya need,
I'm wearin' it.
159
00:07:09,767 --> 00:07:11,267
Come on, try me.
160
00:07:11,934 --> 00:07:13,067
Okay.
161
00:07:13,167 --> 00:07:14,601
You got any gum?
162
00:07:14,701 --> 00:07:16,300
Uh, no.
163
00:07:16,400 --> 00:07:17,968
How about a pen?
164
00:07:18,968 --> 00:07:20,567
Cough drops? Matches?
165
00:07:20,667 --> 00:07:22,934
Tweezers? Hand lotion?
166
00:07:23,033 --> 00:07:25,367
No. No. But check it out.
167
00:07:25,467 --> 00:07:28,133
I got a cork and this
really cool rock.
168
00:07:28,234 --> 00:07:29,868
You're an embarrassment
to your pants.
169
00:07:29,968 --> 00:07:31,534
No, no, no, no.
170
00:07:31,634 --> 00:07:33,767
Hey, look. Look. Huh?
171
00:07:33,868 --> 00:07:35,968
You didn't even
look at the cork.
172
00:07:37,534 --> 00:07:39,534
Hi, Oscar. Hey, Emma.
Hi.
173
00:07:39,634 --> 00:07:42,067
Ooo, looks like someone's
havin' a party.
174
00:07:42,167 --> 00:07:44,968
Yeah.
A turn-our-son-into-a-man party.
175
00:07:45,067 --> 00:07:46,868
Brent's having
a bar mitzvah?
176
00:07:46,968 --> 00:07:49,934
No. We're showing him
a scary movie.
177
00:07:50,033 --> 00:07:51,968
He's too sensitive
or something.
178
00:07:52,067 --> 00:07:53,601
I blame the hippies.
179
00:07:53,701 --> 00:07:57,167
Well, I'm glad his journey
into adulthood will include...
180
00:07:57,267 --> 00:07:58,734
Yummy Gums.
181
00:07:58,834 --> 00:08:00,534
Those are for me.
182
00:08:00,634 --> 00:08:02,267
I like your sunglasses.
183
00:08:02,367 --> 00:08:04,434
Oh. Thank you.
184
00:08:04,534 --> 00:08:06,868
They're Karen's, actually.
185
00:08:06,968 --> 00:08:08,868
I can borrow her stuff.
186
00:08:08,968 --> 00:08:10,367
She can borrow my stuff.
187
00:08:10,467 --> 00:08:14,133
I guess we have what you'd
call a don't-ask policy.
188
00:08:14,234 --> 00:08:16,067
Like the military.
189
00:08:16,167 --> 00:08:17,667
Not exactly.
190
00:08:18,667 --> 00:08:20,901
Next time not so fast.
191
00:08:24,567 --> 00:08:27,667
Someone borrowed
my regular ones.
192
00:08:35,367 --> 00:08:37,267
That's a lot of stuff.
193
00:08:37,367 --> 00:08:39,801
I guess you could say
it's a pant load.
194
00:08:40,901 --> 00:08:45,634
Breath mints, bug spray,
lighter, tweezers.
195
00:08:45,734 --> 00:08:49,534
Who are ya...
like, the guy?
196
00:08:49,634 --> 00:08:53,434
That guy from the TV show,
always buildin' anything
outta stuff.
197
00:08:53,534 --> 00:08:54,434
MacGyver?
198
00:08:54,534 --> 00:08:56,100
Who are ya, MacGyver?
199
00:08:56,200 --> 00:08:58,767
Don't derail him. He's finally
getting breath mints.
200
00:08:58,868 --> 00:09:00,267
Go ahead and laugh.
201
00:09:00,367 --> 00:09:04,734
But you multiply the time
it takes you to make fun of me
202
00:09:04,834 --> 00:09:08,734
by three and then add a year and
then divide that by your age
203
00:09:08,834 --> 00:09:11,667
and, you know, you're wastin'
a good 20, 30 years
204
00:09:11,767 --> 00:09:13,567
of your life, right there.
205
00:09:13,667 --> 00:09:16,367
Yeah? Well, time well wasted.
206
00:09:16,467 --> 00:09:18,267
You know, this is
a big responsibility.
207
00:09:18,367 --> 00:09:20,267
I got a lotta pockets
to fill,
208
00:09:20,367 --> 00:09:22,434
a lot of contingencies
to be ready for.
209
00:09:22,534 --> 00:09:24,534
You got any money?
210
00:09:24,634 --> 00:09:26,701
Out in my truck.
211
00:09:29,901 --> 00:09:32,100
Thank you for
the sunglasses.
212
00:09:32,200 --> 00:09:34,267
I guess you've learned
a little lesson, huh?
213
00:09:34,367 --> 00:09:35,868
Yeah.
214
00:09:36,767 --> 00:09:38,167
Here's your iPod.
215
00:09:38,267 --> 00:09:40,000
You borrowed my iPod?
216
00:09:40,100 --> 00:09:41,734
This was in my purse.
217
00:09:41,834 --> 00:09:42,901
I know.
218
00:09:43,000 --> 00:09:44,634
Behind the counter,
below the till.
219
00:09:44,734 --> 00:09:46,801
By the way, you're
out of red lipstick.
220
00:09:46,901 --> 00:09:48,300
Oh, fine.
221
00:09:48,400 --> 00:09:51,200
I guess you're okay if
I borrow this, then?
222
00:09:51,300 --> 00:09:52,234
Yep.
223
00:09:52,334 --> 00:09:54,100
Maybe I'll make some
long distance calls.
224
00:09:54,200 --> 00:09:56,367
Knock yourself out.
225
00:09:56,467 --> 00:09:58,100
See ya.
226
00:10:04,601 --> 00:10:06,534
Hey, where's my cell phone?
227
00:10:09,367 --> 00:10:11,300
Hey, pass me the jam.
228
00:10:11,400 --> 00:10:14,968
I could waste valuable time
reachin' for that jam, or...
229
00:10:15,067 --> 00:10:17,501
I could give you
one of mine.
230
00:10:17,601 --> 00:10:20,334
Mmm, warm jam
from your pants.
231
00:10:20,434 --> 00:10:23,167
Well, let me think about
that while Lacey passes me
232
00:10:23,267 --> 00:10:25,100
the jam that's not
from your pants.
233
00:10:25,200 --> 00:10:27,667
Oh. Just a sec.
I gotta wipe my hands.
234
00:10:27,767 --> 00:10:29,767
Oh, hold on, hold on.
235
00:10:30,467 --> 00:10:32,434
Wow. Thanks, Hank.
236
00:10:32,534 --> 00:10:35,501
You want peanut
butter for that?
No.
237
00:10:35,601 --> 00:10:37,334
Those pants have
everything.
238
00:10:37,434 --> 00:10:39,667
Yeah. Let my pants surprise you.
239
00:10:39,767 --> 00:10:41,200
Come on, challenge me.
240
00:10:41,300 --> 00:10:43,934
Okay. How about pliers?
241
00:10:44,033 --> 00:10:47,334
Oh, I-I don't know, Brent.
Not as smart as you thought.
242
00:10:47,434 --> 00:10:49,834
Regular or needle nose?
243
00:10:55,734 --> 00:10:57,901
What happened
to my computer?
244
00:10:58,000 --> 00:11:00,834
What do you think happened
to your computer?
245
00:11:02,400 --> 00:11:04,400
Anybody need a laptop?
246
00:11:04,501 --> 00:11:06,701
No. Lacey took it.
247
00:11:06,801 --> 00:11:08,868
Why didn't you stop her?
248
00:11:08,968 --> 00:11:10,734
I'm not good at confrontation.
249
00:11:10,834 --> 00:11:13,567
You're a cop.
You have to take people on.
250
00:11:13,667 --> 00:11:16,801
Okay, okay, whatever you say.
251
00:11:20,901 --> 00:11:22,534
I made popcorn.
252
00:11:22,634 --> 00:11:24,267
Oh, you're a
wonderful host.
253
00:11:24,367 --> 00:11:25,801
Mm, my pleasure.
254
00:11:25,901 --> 00:11:28,834
It gives me a chance to
use this new DVD player.
255
00:11:28,934 --> 00:11:30,334
What are we
watchin', again?
256
00:11:30,434 --> 00:11:32,367
What do you care?
You'll be asleep.
257
00:11:32,467 --> 00:11:34,033
Long Weekend of Evil.
258
00:11:34,133 --> 00:11:35,934
Is that in May?
259
00:11:37,200 --> 00:11:39,200
Oh, geez. I don't
like this already.
260
00:11:39,300 --> 00:11:40,901
Nothing's happened yet.
261
00:11:41,000 --> 00:11:42,667
Who's that guy?
262
00:11:44,033 --> 00:11:46,000
Why's he gettin'
outta the car?
263
00:11:48,701 --> 00:11:50,834
Is that his cabin
or her cabin?
264
00:11:51,934 --> 00:11:54,868
What do you think a place
like that would go for?
265
00:11:54,968 --> 00:11:56,367
All good questions, Oscar.
266
00:11:56,467 --> 00:12:00,000
Why don't you close your
eyes and think about
them for a while.
267
00:12:00,100 --> 00:12:03,133
Oh, don't go in there.
268
00:12:03,234 --> 00:12:05,133
Betcha a cat's
gonna jump out.
269
00:12:05,234 --> 00:12:06,634
A cat? When?
270
00:12:06,734 --> 00:12:08,400
Don't know when.
271
00:12:08,501 --> 00:12:11,801
Why do cats gotta jump out
at people all the time?
272
00:12:11,901 --> 00:12:14,067
Here, kitty kitty.
273
00:12:16,934 --> 00:12:19,467
Or buzz saw.
274
00:12:19,567 --> 00:12:21,934
I'm just glad
it wasn't a cat.
275
00:12:22,033 --> 00:12:23,701
Took his head clean off.
276
00:12:23,801 --> 00:12:26,133
Clean? There's blood everywhere.
277
00:12:26,234 --> 00:12:28,567
Looks like it's her
cabin now, eh, Dad?
278
00:12:38,901 --> 00:12:40,834
You okay?
279
00:12:40,934 --> 00:12:42,501
Oh, I'm more than okay.
280
00:12:42,601 --> 00:12:44,801
I'm fully loaded to
maximum pant capacity.
281
00:12:44,901 --> 00:12:46,601
Check this out.
282
00:12:46,701 --> 00:12:48,100
Hey, Hank.
283
00:12:48,200 --> 00:12:49,601
Can I get ya anything?
284
00:12:49,701 --> 00:12:51,534
Uh, no thanks, Phil. I'm good.
285
00:12:55,067 --> 00:12:57,234
Heh-heh-heh.
Pretty cool, huh?
286
00:12:57,334 --> 00:12:59,667
Wow. I gotta admit,
I'm impressed.
287
00:12:59,767 --> 00:13:01,400
Hey, beer's on me tonight.
288
00:13:03,367 --> 00:13:04,868
Hey. Oh, whoa, woo.
289
00:13:06,334 --> 00:13:08,100
Where'd that come from?
290
00:13:08,200 --> 00:13:09,267
Geesh.
291
00:13:15,534 --> 00:13:17,634
You got one for me?
292
00:13:18,400 --> 00:13:20,400
I can make ya a daiquiri.
293
00:13:21,434 --> 00:13:23,067
Huh?
294
00:13:27,334 --> 00:13:29,100
It's over?
295
00:13:30,667 --> 00:13:33,334
The evil guy's not dead yet.
296
00:13:33,434 --> 00:13:35,434
Well, that's just freaky.
297
00:13:35,534 --> 00:13:37,567
That was the scariest
movie I've seen yet.
298
00:13:37,667 --> 00:13:42,334
If you got a cat, put a bell
around its neck so you know
where it is.
299
00:13:42,434 --> 00:13:45,501
Who won?
Team Canada.
300
00:13:45,601 --> 00:13:47,801
Um, hello?
301
00:13:47,901 --> 00:13:49,400
Oh, hey, Lacey.
302
00:13:49,501 --> 00:13:51,901
What are you all
doing in my house?
303
00:13:52,000 --> 00:13:54,200
Oh, we're watching
a movie.
Oh.
304
00:13:54,300 --> 00:13:57,133
It's about some stupid evil cat,
but it won't die.
305
00:13:57,234 --> 00:13:59,567
And Team Canada
tries to kill it.
306
00:13:59,667 --> 00:14:02,133
Your sentences are like quilts.
307
00:14:02,234 --> 00:14:04,767
You just let yourselves
into my house?
308
00:14:04,868 --> 00:14:07,334
No. Karen invited us.
309
00:14:07,434 --> 00:14:09,434
I found jujubes!
310
00:14:10,267 --> 00:14:12,701
Oh. Hi, Lacey.
311
00:14:12,801 --> 00:14:15,033
You borrowed my house.
312
00:14:17,100 --> 00:14:19,868
Well, there should be some
scary music right about now.
313
00:14:26,934 --> 00:14:28,467
Hey, Brent.
314
00:14:28,567 --> 00:14:30,801
I need to pick up
a few things.
315
00:14:31,400 --> 00:14:35,467
Ribbon, plastic spoons,
dental floss, taco shells.
316
00:14:35,567 --> 00:14:37,534
What, are you opening
your own Wal-Mart?
317
00:14:37,634 --> 00:14:41,100
Man, it's these pants.
They're never satisfied.
318
00:14:41,200 --> 00:14:43,467
Well, I don't even
carry half this stuff.
319
00:14:43,567 --> 00:14:45,100
Pogs?
320
00:14:45,200 --> 00:14:48,100
I don't know how much longer
I can keep this up.
321
00:14:48,200 --> 00:14:50,501
There's just no
pleasin' these pants.
322
00:14:50,601 --> 00:14:53,000
Hey, uh, Hank, have
you got a thimble?
323
00:14:53,100 --> 00:14:55,801
What do you people
want from me?
324
00:14:55,901 --> 00:14:58,801
I'm not sure.
But he wants a thimble.
325
00:14:58,901 --> 00:15:00,801
Put it on the list.
326
00:15:03,868 --> 00:15:05,767
Did you have fun
borrowing my house?
327
00:15:05,868 --> 00:15:08,601
It wasn't your house, it
was just your living room.
328
00:15:08,701 --> 00:15:11,734
Besides, you using my laptop was
like borrowing my whole office.
329
00:15:11,834 --> 00:15:14,501
I didn't let Oscar drool
all over your computer.
330
00:15:14,601 --> 00:15:17,067
You replaced the high scores
on my computer games.
331
00:15:17,167 --> 00:15:19,400
Yeah. Well, that wasn't
very hard to do.
332
00:15:19,501 --> 00:15:21,601
You really suck
at mah-jong.
333
00:15:21,701 --> 00:15:22,868
Fine.
334
00:15:22,968 --> 00:15:25,801
When it comes to borrowing,
the gloves are off.
335
00:15:25,901 --> 00:15:27,701
All right, I guess they are.
336
00:15:27,801 --> 00:15:31,801
Should I charge you for
those fries, or are you
just going to borrow them?
337
00:15:31,901 --> 00:15:34,701
I'll pay for them.
Can I borrow some money?
338
00:15:35,801 --> 00:15:37,300
Take it outta here.
339
00:15:37,400 --> 00:15:39,667
I borrowed your purse.
340
00:15:50,067 --> 00:15:57,868
*
341
00:15:58,534 --> 00:16:00,767
Oscar, can you go down
in the basement
342
00:16:00,868 --> 00:16:02,934
and get me
a jar of pickles?
343
00:16:03,033 --> 00:16:07,267
Why can't you do it?
You're closer.
Because I'm busy.
344
00:16:07,367 --> 00:16:08,767
Oh, I get it.
345
00:16:08,868 --> 00:16:12,701
You're scared to go down
in the basement because
of that dumb movie.
346
00:16:12,801 --> 00:16:13,901
No, I'm not.
347
00:16:14,000 --> 00:16:17,767
Is the bogey man waiting
under the stairs?
348
00:16:17,868 --> 00:16:19,567
Just go get the pickles.
349
00:16:19,667 --> 00:16:21,100
Are you kidding?
350
00:16:21,200 --> 00:16:23,968
Who knows what kinda
lunatic's down there.
351
00:16:28,901 --> 00:16:31,701
Oh, man, I'm not sure
this is all worth it.
352
00:16:31,801 --> 00:16:34,133
I mean, sure, it's nice
being all self-sufficient,
353
00:16:34,234 --> 00:16:37,801
but it seems my whole life
revolves around my pants.
354
00:16:37,901 --> 00:16:40,133
Well, it seems to me
like those pants
355
00:16:40,234 --> 00:16:42,767
are wearin' the pants
in this relationship.
356
00:16:42,868 --> 00:16:45,300
You think so?
357
00:16:46,000 --> 00:16:47,400
I know so.
358
00:16:47,501 --> 00:16:49,934
I have been in relationships
like this before,
359
00:16:50,033 --> 00:16:51,434
normally with people.
360
00:16:51,534 --> 00:16:54,501
You know at first
everything is great.
361
00:16:54,601 --> 00:16:56,167
And then the novelty wears off
362
00:16:56,267 --> 00:16:58,934
and then it's all me, me,
me, me, me, me.
363
00:16:59,033 --> 00:17:00,834
Is that why they dump you?
364
00:17:00,934 --> 00:17:03,701
The point is,
maybe the best thing for you
365
00:17:03,801 --> 00:17:05,567
is to break up
with your pants.
366
00:17:05,667 --> 00:17:06,701
Whoa.
367
00:17:06,801 --> 00:17:09,767
You talk about them like
they're not even here.
368
00:17:09,868 --> 00:17:11,000
That was Mom.
369
00:17:11,100 --> 00:17:14,000
Her and Dad are too afraid
to go down in the basement.
370
00:17:15,200 --> 00:17:17,968
Geez, your folks got a
good handle on reality.
371
00:17:18,067 --> 00:17:21,267
Do they think there's
an axe murderer hiding
in the potato bin?
372
00:17:21,367 --> 00:17:23,200
In with the pickles,
actually.
Oh.
373
00:17:23,300 --> 00:17:26,400
So now they need me to
go down there for them.
374
00:17:27,767 --> 00:17:30,534
Hey, while I'm gone, could
you clean the stock room?
375
00:17:30,634 --> 00:17:32,400
What?
376
00:17:37,767 --> 00:17:39,601
By myself?
377
00:17:40,534 --> 00:17:42,467
You sure you
want to do this?
378
00:17:42,567 --> 00:17:45,200
This way there's
closure.
379
00:17:50,334 --> 00:17:53,200
It's not you, it's me.
380
00:17:55,601 --> 00:17:59,801
Whoa-ooo! Hoo-hoo-hoo!
That was awesome!
381
00:17:59,901 --> 00:18:01,601
Buy me lunch?
382
00:18:01,701 --> 00:18:04,467
Huh? Oh. I can't.
383
00:18:04,567 --> 00:18:08,567
I just realized my debit
card's still in those pants.
384
00:18:08,667 --> 00:18:09,567
Great.
385
00:18:09,667 --> 00:18:12,067
Now you're borrowing
my wood chipper.
386
00:18:13,534 --> 00:18:15,767
Well, here you go,
one jar of pickles.
387
00:18:15,868 --> 00:18:17,767
Found them right behind
the severed heads.
388
00:18:17,868 --> 00:18:19,934
We're just taking extra care
to make sure
389
00:18:20,033 --> 00:18:23,000
we're safe in our home
and you make fun of us.
390
00:18:23,100 --> 00:18:26,601
I'm not as sensitive now that
you've turned me into a man.
391
00:18:26,701 --> 00:18:28,200
I'm finally
kinda proud of ya.
392
00:18:28,300 --> 00:18:30,934
Can you go to the shed
and get my rake?
393
00:18:31,033 --> 00:18:34,100
Why are you freaked out?
You didn't even see the movie.
394
00:18:34,200 --> 00:18:37,400
I saw the credits. Some of
the letters were bleeding.
395
00:18:37,501 --> 00:18:39,200
I borrowed your
curling iron.
396
00:18:39,300 --> 00:18:40,701
I hope that's okay.
397
00:18:40,801 --> 00:18:42,901
Sure, it's fine.
398
00:18:43,000 --> 00:18:44,901
Feel free to
say if it's not.
399
00:18:45,000 --> 00:18:46,400
No, I'm happy.
400
00:18:46,501 --> 00:18:47,701
You happy?
401
00:18:47,801 --> 00:18:49,801
I'm happy.
402
00:18:49,901 --> 00:18:51,968
Because you're probably
gettin' tired of this.
403
00:18:52,067 --> 00:18:54,033
No.
404
00:18:54,133 --> 00:18:56,567
Are you?
No. It's great.
405
00:18:56,667 --> 00:18:58,734
I'm late for work.
406
00:19:03,701 --> 00:19:04,734
This okay?
407
00:19:04,834 --> 00:19:05,801
Sure.
408
00:19:05,901 --> 00:19:07,501
Great.
409
00:19:14,667 --> 00:19:18,734
Hey, you never let me
use the sirens.
410
00:19:27,667 --> 00:19:37,567
*
411
00:19:37,667 --> 00:19:41,534
*
412
00:19:41,634 --> 00:19:43,534
Hey, what's goin' on?
413
00:19:43,634 --> 00:19:44,767
Whoa! Whoo-woo!
414
00:19:44,868 --> 00:19:46,467
Whoa, whoa! Whoa!
415
00:19:46,567 --> 00:19:48,634
Whoa!
416
00:19:48,734 --> 00:19:49,934
Sorry.
417
00:19:50,033 --> 00:19:52,767
I thought you
were a psycho.
418
00:19:52,868 --> 00:19:55,033
Yeah, I'm the psycho.
419
00:19:55,133 --> 00:19:57,300
Okay, that's it.
No more slasher flicks.
420
00:19:57,400 --> 00:19:59,667
I think it's time I broadened
everyone's horizons
421
00:19:59,767 --> 00:20:01,734
with a little culture.
422
00:20:01,834 --> 00:20:04,100
Slam Dunk Money?
423
00:20:04,200 --> 00:20:06,133
Trust me. Of all the
animals-playing-sports movies,
424
00:20:06,234 --> 00:20:07,801
this is one of the best.
425
00:20:07,901 --> 00:20:09,467
That monkey's not
wearin' a shirt.
426
00:20:09,567 --> 00:20:11,968
How can you tell which
team he's playin' for?
427
00:20:12,067 --> 00:20:15,434
The monkey plays basketball?
How high can that thing jump?
428
00:20:15,534 --> 00:20:18,834
Actually, he just runs
up the pole and stands
on the backboard.
429
00:20:18,934 --> 00:20:21,267
Oh, come on. Even I know
that's not allowed.
430
00:20:21,367 --> 00:20:23,701
It's not. Until crusty league
commissioner Ed Asner
431
00:20:23,801 --> 00:20:26,000
is forced to change the rules.
432
00:20:26,100 --> 00:20:29,534
Oh, but I've said too much.
Let's just watch.
433
00:20:31,767 --> 00:20:35,167
Maybe the monkey will be playing
against Team Canada, eh, Oscar?
434
00:20:35,267 --> 00:20:37,501
*
435
00:20:37,601 --> 00:20:40,667
Okay, I'm going to bed.
Lock up when you leave.
436
00:20:40,767 --> 00:20:42,601
Goodnight.
Night. Night.
437
00:20:48,667 --> 00:20:50,434
Oh, Hank, you got
any dental floss?
438
00:20:50,534 --> 00:20:53,300
Uh, nope. Sorry, I can't
help ya. Isn't that great?
439
00:20:53,400 --> 00:20:54,901
I guess.
440
00:20:57,901 --> 00:21:00,133
Back to the old
pants, I see.
441
00:21:00,234 --> 00:21:02,367
Yep. No more pockets
to answer to.
442
00:21:02,467 --> 00:21:04,801
I'm a free man.
443
00:21:04,901 --> 00:21:07,634
I guess a part of me
misses the old Hank,
444
00:21:07,734 --> 00:21:09,133
the old new Hank.
445
00:21:09,234 --> 00:21:11,267
Aw. Well, the new
old Hank's starvin'.
446
00:21:11,367 --> 00:21:13,033
How about some lunch?
I'm buyin'.
447
00:21:13,133 --> 00:21:17,300
I guess this means I'm back
to waitin' for you to get
stuff outta your truck?
448
00:21:17,400 --> 00:21:19,300
Nope. I decided
to get a wallet.
449
00:21:19,400 --> 00:21:21,300
This solves all
my problems.
450
00:21:21,400 --> 00:21:23,267
It sure does.
451
00:21:23,367 --> 00:21:25,567
Closed Captioning by
452
00:21:25,667 --> 00:21:28,300
Vertical Sync
Closed Captioning Services Inc.
453
00:21:28,400 --> 00:21:30,968
www. verticalsync. com
454
00:21:31,067 --> 00:21:34,400
* I don't know the same things
you don't know *
455
00:21:38,167 --> 00:21:42,400
* I don't know
I just don't know *
456
00:21:48,133 --> 00:21:51,601
* It's a great big place
457
00:21:51,701 --> 00:21:55,367
* full of nothin' but space
458
00:21:55,467 --> 00:21:57,267
* and it's my happy place
459
00:21:57,367 --> 00:22:00,534
* I don't know
Yes you do *
460
00:22:00,634 --> 00:22:06,200
* You just won't admit it
461
00:22:06,300 --> 00:22:10,968
Want to have a gas online?
Visit us at cornergas. com
462
00:22:11,834 --> 00:22:13,734
* I don't know
463
00:22:13,834 --> 00:22:18,033
* I just don't know *
33042
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