Original subtitles

Another glorious sun-drenched day in Gotham City.

A fitting day for nuptials, exhibits, or grand theft.

"Look out, cops. I hereby crown myself."

Signed, False Face.

Yes, he's back again, that infamous criminal master of trickery and disguise.

I am the Princess Mergenberg.

What is this I hear? My crown will be stolen?

Oh, we'll keep it safe for you, Your Highness.

Oh, so? Then what is this?

"All that glitters is gone."

Shouldn't that be "All that glitters is gold"?

Oh, that's the trademark of False Face, a false quote.

But the crown is here, and safe.

Not quite, Chief O'Hara.

It's False Face.

In disguised person.

Stop, thief.

An inflatable cape. She must be an accomplice.

After them, men.

The police are hot on our trail.

Then we'll cool them down.

Oh, so False Face is back and up to his old tricks, eh? Heh.

Disguised as the Princess Mergenberg...

he and his accomplice, the beautiful Blaze, tried for the crown.

And failed.

A false top. Plastic.

The crown.

Phony.

Utterly worthless.

False Face has struck deviously and ruthlessly.

Can't we stop this master of devilish disguises?

Commissioner, there's only one man living who can unmask False Face.

Chief O'Hara, you have said it for all of us.

Our only hope is that towering power for right and justice, the Caped Crusader.

I'll call him, sir.

Pine, elm, hickory...

Gosh, botany is tough. I'll never learn to recognize all these trees.

Come, come, Dick.

Pine, elm, hickory, chestnut, maple.

Part of our heritage is the lore of living things, the storybook of nature.

That's true, Bruce. I'll learn to read that book of nature yet.

Begging your pardon, sir. It's the Batphone.

- Jiminy, what are we waiting for? - Oh, Dick, I found one of your specimens.

Thanks a million, Aunt Harriet, but we were just going to, uh... Uh...

A ramble in the woods, Aunt Harriet. Nature in the raw, so to speak.

Oh.

Yes, commissioner?

Prepare yourself for a shock.

It's False Face. He struck again.

We're on our way.

To the Batpoles.

I'm afraid it won't stop for the Mergenberg crown, worth a million though it is.

This is only the first droplet in a virtual wave of crime.

Jiminy, yes. False Face always plans big. Crooked, but king size.

All too true, Boy Wonder.

Messenger here for Batman.

- Uh, are you Batman, sonny? - I am.

"I intend to give money to a defenseless little girl." Signed, F.F.

I'd wager that's some sort of a code.

It is. False Face always says the opposite of what he means.

Then "I intend to give money" means he intends to take money.

But what defenseless little girl?

- Confusing, eh, sonny? - Not really.

The victim is neither little nor a girl nor defenseless.

Opposite of girl's a boy.

And the opposite of defenseless?

- Say, wearing armor? - That's it. Of course.

The Ladd Armored Car Company.

Holy bouncy boilerplate, it fits.

Ladd as in boy, armored for defense, a big truck full of money.

That's it. You've got it.

I have more than that.

Unless I missed my gaze, you're...

Blaze, False Face's trusted assistant, at your service.

You've got quite a grip there, Caped Crusader.

A sound mind and a sound body, a necessity in the relentless war against crime.

And speaking of crime, why did False Face send you here?

False Face challenges you to prove that he's committed a crime.

And if you do, to catch him.

And me.

It's too late.

- Blaze, she's as elusive as a flickering flame. - I'll bet that's how she earned her nickname.

I warrant you, we'll snuff out her fiery criminal career.

To the Ladd Armored Car Company, let's go.

Are we all assembled?

The counterfeit crew are ready and on duty, False Face.

Good.

First, men, I've succeeded in lifting the Mergenberg crown.

- You've done it again, F.F. - Only the beginning.

Blaze, my trusted assistant...

has succeeded in starting off step two of my overall plan.

We are about to double-dizzy Batman and Robin...

until the dexterous duo is duped, decoyed and diabolically destroyed.

I have planned the greatest creation of my covert criminal career.

False Face will stamp his disguised image on all Gotham City.

Today Gotham City, tomorrow the world.

Three cheers for F.F.

Hooray! Hooray! Hooray!

Thanks, men. I know you didn't mean it.

But back to business.

Batman and Robin must go.

Batman and Robin.

Why, it isn't often that a simple businessman is honored by a visit...

from the champion of justice and his youthful associate.

- How can I help you? - Rather it's we who can help you.

We have reason to believe that one of your armored trucks may be in danger.

Good heavens.

I've just received word that one of my trucks is late...

and is due at the National Bank to pick up a huge shipment of money.

I wouldn't be surprised if False Face were the spoke...

- in that set of wheels. - Right.

- Mr. Ladd, may I use your telephone? - Oh, yes, of course.

Commissioner Gordon please, this is Batman speaking.

Commissioner, there's no time to explain.

Dispatch as many spare men as possible to the Gotham City National Bank immediately.

Mr. Ladd, we'll keep you informed...

and let you know as soon as your missing truck is found.

Bless you, Batman.

Every law-abiding citizen of Gotham City goes with you in spirit.

And if it were possible, in body.

Batman and Robin. Come to make a deposit?

No, we've come to prevent a withdrawal, by False Face.

What? False Face, notorious criminal, master of disguise?

Then we better load the money in the truck before it's too late.

It's already too late, False Face.

- What? - Right.

That's False Face himself in disguised person.

Yeah? What makes you so sure?

It's obvious.

Only a criminal would disguise himself as a licensed bonded guard...

yet callously park in front of a fire hydrant.

It's always the little things.

This time it'll cost you a big penalty, False Face.

We're going to withdraw you from circulation and deposit you in jail.

Well, Boy Wonder, your interest is overdue.

Thank you, Batman, for braking into my trap.

Batman, it's Blaze in the Batmobile.

Aah. Oh, you're so strong.

I urge you to abandon this life of crime, Blaze, before it's too late.

It's already too late, Batman.

Holy Houdini.

Another deft escape by that master of disguise and deceit.

But where can False Face be?

Saints alive. It's False Face disguised as meself.

Right you are, O'Hara. Welcome to dreamland.

All right, take off.

- Everything's under control, chief. - Good work.

This paper that False Face used to print his message, it's rather special.

Tensile resistance, 85.

Holy armored plate. This is the strongest stuff I've ever seen.

As I suspected.

Eighty-six, 87, 87.6.

I can't figure it out, Batman.

I think a little session with the Batanalyst might clarify things, Robin.

Uh, I seem to be short of cash. Alfred, have you a dollar bill?

- Certainly, sir. There. - Thank you.

By focusing ultraviolet light...

and applying the principles of controlled fluorescent diffraction...

we can readily discern...

False Face printed his message on the same kind of paper they use to make money.

What use could he make of that sort of paper, sir?

To make money. His kind of money, counterfeit money.

Will the man stop at nothing?

This paper is made by a top-secret government process, indeed.

Only a few people outside the official banknote printing company are aware...

that it's the only paper that cannot be counterfeited.

Aha.

- You found something? - The solution, sir?

The size, the material, it all fits.

This is official banknote paper.

False Face must have penetrated the official banknote printing company.

And if he has plans for counterfeiting, he'll go back there for more special paper.

But we will be there before he is. To the Batmobile.

Alfred, inform Mrs. Cooper that we may be a trifle late for supper this evening.

Very good, sir.

- There's nobody here. - Not so far.

But if someone should arrive, I think we should be out of sight.

- Excuse me, do you have a light? - Why, certainly.

But smoking is forbidden in the banknote paper room.

- What department are you in, miss? - Removal.

You see, my curious friend, we need this paper.

Quickly, move this into the trick truck.

- It's Batman. - And Robin.

We've been found out.

No, you don't, Blaze. I have the answer to that little trick.

I knew sooner or later...

you would overcome my bag of tricks.

Let the plant guards clean up these beauties. I want to interrogate Blaze.

Batman. Let me down!

You must excuse Chief O'Hara.

He has an agonizing toothache and finds it difficult to speak.

- I can hardly recognize his voice. - Mm.

I hope it gets better, Chief O'Hara.

She's awakened.

Well, miss, it seems we've apprehended you.

You? Scarcely.

Batman captured me.

Only the nemesis of crime could have tripped up Blaze so deftly.

Blaze, we've deduced False Face's intent to counterfeit money.

We must know where he intends to perform the printing.

So you're in on the counterfeiting caper.

Very clever, Caped Crusader.

But I know that's only part of his overall plan.

We must have details on the complete plot. How, where, when?

- I don't know. - You? His first lieutenant?

That's pretty dim, Blaze.

False Face trusts no one, and no one trusts False Face.

Like his name, like his enumerable disguises, he is forever in concealment.

I know he plans a gigantic coup, but I am not in on his plans.

Then I'm afraid we're at a dead-end.

I'll tell you one thing, Batman.

If there is one force in this world that False Face fears, it's you.

And the Boy Wonder, of course.

Many times I have heard him mutter, "If it were not for the Caped Crusaders...

I would be kingpin of the criminal class."

The swine.

That False Face is rotten to his concealed core.

Please, commissioner, even False Face has a conscience, somewhere...

and can be rehabilitated, somehow.

That's so true, Batman. For the moment, I was carried away.

Batman, you... You are truly good.

And if I can, I'll help you find False Face.

All right, we'll take a chance on trusting you, Blaze.

Sorry, I... I was carried away.

- Well, let's all be away, after False Face. - Right.

If I might make a suggestion.

Why not let the dynamic duo go with Blaze...

while I make certain a force of picked police stand by.

- Capital. - Good thinking, O'Hara.

It's nothing.

I'd better be on me way too, commissioner.

- I wouldn't wanna lose Batman. - Right.

Can it be? Are Batman and Robin rushing into dire peril?

Does Batman know Chief O'Hara is False Face?

Can he trust the treacherous Blaze?

Clever. Who'd suspect a shut-down subway station?

And it's centrally located for False Face's nefarious plans.

I'm sorry we took so long to get here, Batman, but I was unsure of the way.

Where to now? Time is of the essence.

Oh, good heavens, no wonder I'm starved. It's after lunch.

Oh, Batman, would you get me a candy bar please?

Candy?

Actually fresh fruit is much more healthful.

Oh, but there's none here, and there is a candy machine.

He's such a gentleman. You both are.

True cavaliers.

Aw.

False Face.

That's quick-setting plastic cement.

Oh, yes, you're strong, Batman, but a bull elephant couldn't break these bonds.

- False Face, is this killing necessary? - Absolutely. They must be disposed of.

The express will be through here inside of five minutes, Batman.

Inside of six, no more Batman.

Fiend.

False Face, you'll regret this, eventually.

Oh, I regret it already. False Face, let's reconsider.

Never.

No, you don't. Come.

Batman, forgive me.

Of course, Blaze.

Any young girl might follow the wrong impulse.

I forgive you.

Take a last look.

Inside of minutes, the dynamic duo will be merely disintegrated debris.