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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:02:43,831 --> 00:02:47,125 Okay, ladies and gents, Walkabout Creek Hotel. 2 00:02:47,585 --> 00:02:49,836 Last chance for a coldie before we hit the outback. 3 00:02:53,466 --> 00:02:55,842 G'day, all. I'm your hostess. 4 00:02:56,385 --> 00:02:58,887 You can call me Ruby or love or anything, 5 00:02:59,096 --> 00:03:00,513 but never late for breakfast. 6 00:03:04,393 --> 00:03:06,186 And what's your pleasure, folks? 7 00:03:06,437 --> 00:03:08,980 Gin and tonic, please, and a Pimm's for the lady. 8 00:03:09,065 --> 00:03:10,357 "G" and "T" and a Pimm's. 9 00:03:15,696 --> 00:03:17,906 No, I asked for a gin and tonic and a Pimm's. 10 00:03:18,532 --> 00:03:20,533 Yeah, well, there's no harm in asking. 11 00:03:23,329 --> 00:03:26,331 - Couple of beers will be just fine. - That's the ticket, old mate. 12 00:03:30,127 --> 00:03:32,003 - Hey, Nugget. - G'day, Sue. 13 00:03:33,130 --> 00:03:36,174 - Where's Mick? - We got a panic call from the rangers. 14 00:03:37,009 --> 00:03:40,678 They spotted a huge croc in the Tarrabool swimming hole. 15 00:03:41,222 --> 00:03:45,934 Actually, we tossed a coin to see who'd catch it, and Mick won. 16 00:03:46,227 --> 00:03:48,645 - He went after it alone, did he? - No. 17 00:03:48,729 --> 00:03:50,522 Jacko Jackson's gonna meet him out there. 18 00:03:51,232 --> 00:03:52,232 And Jacko, as you know, 19 00:03:52,316 --> 00:03:54,192 is the second best crocodile man in the territory. 20 00:03:54,276 --> 00:03:55,485 So you got no worries, love. 21 00:03:55,611 --> 00:03:58,947 Well, my only worry is I need Mick to pick Mikey up after school. 22 00:03:59,031 --> 00:04:00,156 I'll tell Mick for you. 23 00:04:00,616 --> 00:04:03,410 If he gets tied up with that croc, I'll pick up the young fella myself. 24 00:04:03,494 --> 00:04:04,577 Thanks. 25 00:04:04,662 --> 00:04:07,288 I thought you were the second best crocodile hunter. 26 00:04:07,373 --> 00:04:10,583 - Well... - He's just modest. 27 00:04:11,085 --> 00:04:12,377 He's one of the best, you know. 28 00:04:16,048 --> 00:04:20,427 Hey, Sue. If anything ever happens to Mick, I'm gonna come courting. 29 00:04:22,304 --> 00:04:24,389 Well, let's just hope nothing happens to Mick. 30 00:04:45,286 --> 00:04:48,455 Now, where are you, you big ugly bugger? 31 00:05:08,350 --> 00:05:09,684 This is as good as it gets. 32 00:05:31,290 --> 00:05:33,958 Come on. Come to uncle Mick. 33 00:05:38,380 --> 00:05:39,422 Big... 34 00:05:42,426 --> 00:05:43,426 Big... 35 00:05:45,679 --> 00:05:46,679 Big mistake. 36 00:05:56,815 --> 00:05:57,815 Shit. 37 00:06:30,933 --> 00:06:34,185 - G'day, Mick. - G'day, Jacko. 38 00:06:35,854 --> 00:06:37,063 What are you doing up there? 39 00:06:38,190 --> 00:06:40,775 Just sitting up here, thinking about a new career, mate. 40 00:06:44,029 --> 00:06:45,029 Where's your boat? 41 00:06:48,200 --> 00:06:49,242 On the bottom. 42 00:06:51,328 --> 00:06:54,998 - How'd that happen? - Croc pulled it under. 43 00:06:55,666 --> 00:06:56,833 Pulled it under? 44 00:07:00,421 --> 00:07:01,421 How big was it? 45 00:07:09,722 --> 00:07:10,805 That big. 46 00:07:14,435 --> 00:07:15,435 Now what? 47 00:07:16,520 --> 00:07:20,565 Well, now we scramble ashore and go to plan "B." 48 00:07:26,238 --> 00:07:27,238 Don't move. 49 00:07:30,909 --> 00:07:32,994 Well, could be worse, mate. 50 00:07:33,370 --> 00:07:35,538 Yeah? How's that, Mick? 51 00:07:36,457 --> 00:07:38,583 Well, someone could see us up here, 52 00:07:38,709 --> 00:07:41,336 up the tree, outsmarted by a bloody crocodile. 53 00:07:52,181 --> 00:07:54,307 So help me God, if I see a snake, I'm gonna drop dead. 54 00:07:57,770 --> 00:08:00,730 How are they gonna catch a crocodile up there in the tree? 55 00:08:02,691 --> 00:08:06,861 So, which one is the second best crocodile hunter in the land? 56 00:08:09,156 --> 00:08:11,741 Okay, everyone, we're on a tight schedule here. 57 00:08:11,825 --> 00:08:14,661 We better keep moving. Don't want to disturb the hunters. 58 00:08:15,829 --> 00:08:17,372 Back on the bus, please, folks. 59 00:08:19,583 --> 00:08:20,625 That's the way. 60 00:08:28,175 --> 00:08:30,760 Bloody Nugget. Great, eh, mate? 61 00:08:31,720 --> 00:08:34,347 Two best crocodile hunters in the entire Northern Territory, eh? 62 00:08:35,557 --> 00:08:36,557 Yeah. 63 00:08:38,102 --> 00:08:40,061 We look like a couple of real pelicans, don't we? 64 00:09:03,961 --> 00:09:06,963 You know what I hate about crocs, mate? They got legs. Come on. 65 00:09:11,427 --> 00:09:13,636 Remember the good old days when we just used to shoot 'em? 66 00:09:14,722 --> 00:09:16,472 Yeah. Yeah, mate, 67 00:09:17,349 --> 00:09:20,143 but if there were no more crocs, they wouldn't need hunters. 68 00:09:21,979 --> 00:09:24,772 They'd need hunters. To keep the wild pigs in control. 69 00:09:25,691 --> 00:09:27,817 Pigs? Not the same. 70 00:09:28,444 --> 00:09:31,904 I don't want my kid saying, "There goes my dad, Pig Dundee. " 71 00:09:33,532 --> 00:09:35,324 Do you want to be known as Porker Jackson? 72 00:09:35,409 --> 00:09:36,409 Well, no. 73 00:09:37,411 --> 00:09:40,621 Nah, we need the crocs, mate. They make us somebodies. 74 00:09:41,623 --> 00:09:44,375 Without 'em, we're just a couple of old bushwhackers 75 00:09:44,460 --> 00:09:45,877 with bite marks on our legs. 76 00:09:47,004 --> 00:09:49,172 We'll get him tomorrow. Same time. 77 00:09:49,381 --> 00:09:52,300 Hey, I knew a pig farmer called Porker O'Brien once. 78 00:09:53,427 --> 00:09:55,219 You know why they called him Porker? 79 00:10:02,102 --> 00:10:05,188 I hate it when he does that. Gives me the creeps. 80 00:10:23,499 --> 00:10:24,665 - Thanks, mate. - No worries. 81 00:10:34,009 --> 00:10:36,427 So, you got out of that tree all right, eh? 82 00:10:38,597 --> 00:10:40,765 Now, how could you possibly know about that already? 83 00:10:42,142 --> 00:10:45,603 My people have ways of talking that no white man can understand. 84 00:10:47,648 --> 00:10:50,650 Arthur, you're so full of bullshit. 85 00:10:52,110 --> 00:10:53,986 No, it's a kind of mental telepathy, eh? 86 00:10:54,363 --> 00:10:55,613 Yeah, mental, all right. 87 00:10:59,201 --> 00:11:01,744 I think we just found out which one of us is the white man. 88 00:11:02,120 --> 00:11:03,162 Yeah? 89 00:11:05,415 --> 00:11:06,582 Yeah, I heard about that. 90 00:11:10,337 --> 00:11:11,838 Yeah, well, he's standing right next to me now. 91 00:11:12,548 --> 00:11:16,300 - Great. - Yeah, okay. Yeah, later. 92 00:11:18,804 --> 00:11:21,055 - So, are you doing a show tonight? - Yeah. 93 00:11:22,057 --> 00:11:25,059 Already did the matinee. Gotta keep the tourists happy, eh? 94 00:11:26,103 --> 00:11:27,979 Well, mate, these days they're our bread and butter. 95 00:11:29,356 --> 00:11:31,482 That's sort of what we are now in the 20th century... 96 00:11:32,192 --> 00:11:33,192 Tourist attractions. 97 00:11:34,570 --> 00:11:36,487 As they say, "That's show business, mate. " 98 00:11:37,197 --> 00:11:38,197 By the way, Mick, 99 00:11:39,491 --> 00:11:41,075 it's the 21 st century, mate. 100 00:11:42,244 --> 00:11:43,286 Yeah, I... I knew that. 101 00:11:48,417 --> 00:11:49,917 See you, Art. See you later. 102 00:11:50,210 --> 00:11:51,544 - See ya, Troy. - See ya, Mikey. 103 00:11:51,753 --> 00:11:53,045 - Wanna go fishing? - Yeah. 104 00:11:57,885 --> 00:12:00,928 - So, what did you learn today? - Just school stuff. 105 00:12:01,680 --> 00:12:03,014 But we had an earthquake video, 106 00:12:03,098 --> 00:12:05,433 and we learned how they happen in California, America. 107 00:12:05,934 --> 00:12:08,895 - Did you see one when you were there? - No, I was in New York. 108 00:12:08,979 --> 00:12:10,354 They don't have earthquakes there. 109 00:12:11,023 --> 00:12:13,858 People there wouldn't stand for it. They'd be like, 110 00:12:15,402 --> 00:12:18,696 "Earthquake? Hey, this is Brooklyn. 111 00:12:19,406 --> 00:12:21,991 "Get outta here. Forget about it. " 112 00:12:23,118 --> 00:12:24,118 They're tough. 113 00:12:27,372 --> 00:12:30,291 Homework time. What's that? 114 00:12:32,044 --> 00:12:36,756 - It's goanna turd. - That means he's close by. Find him. 115 00:12:48,518 --> 00:12:49,936 - There he is. - Yep. 116 00:13:00,322 --> 00:13:03,908 - You hungry? Want him for dinner? - Yuck, no way. 117 00:13:04,159 --> 00:13:07,453 - Well, you better miss then. - Dad, I never miss. 118 00:13:18,423 --> 00:13:21,008 Quick, Dad, there's a big razorback up there. Can you do it? 119 00:13:21,134 --> 00:13:23,886 - Do what? - You know, that trick. Please. 120 00:13:24,388 --> 00:13:26,472 All right, but it won't work if you're scared. He'll smell it. 121 00:13:27,015 --> 00:13:28,808 I know. I won't be scared. I promise. 122 00:13:29,226 --> 00:13:30,601 Don't look at him till I do. 123 00:13:31,395 --> 00:13:34,021 I really won't be scared if I can carry your knife. 124 00:14:06,263 --> 00:14:07,263 Cool. 125 00:14:25,449 --> 00:14:27,575 Okay, Dad, I'll talk it over with Mick. 126 00:14:30,954 --> 00:14:35,041 No. No, and if we decide we need to be married, 127 00:14:35,125 --> 00:14:36,959 I promise you'll be the first to know. 128 00:14:40,005 --> 00:14:44,175 Would you like to say hello to your grandson? Okay. Hang on. 129 00:14:44,885 --> 00:14:47,636 Hey, Mikey. Come say hi to Grandpa. 130 00:14:51,600 --> 00:14:52,683 Hi, Grandpa. 131 00:14:54,311 --> 00:14:55,561 Pretty good, yeah. 132 00:14:58,356 --> 00:14:59,356 So, what's new? 133 00:14:59,941 --> 00:15:03,069 Tom Zetland, he ran the L.A. bureau of Dad's paper. 134 00:15:03,653 --> 00:15:05,362 He was just killed in a car accident. 135 00:15:05,447 --> 00:15:07,865 - What, was he a mate of yours? - Actually, no. 136 00:15:09,284 --> 00:15:13,996 But the thing is, Mick, Dad is now pleading with me to take his place 137 00:15:14,081 --> 00:15:15,956 while he looks for a permanent replacement. 138 00:15:17,042 --> 00:15:18,084 So, what you're saying is 139 00:15:18,168 --> 00:15:21,128 your dad wants you to go and work for him in Los Angeles. 140 00:15:22,964 --> 00:15:24,006 For how long? 141 00:15:25,759 --> 00:15:30,679 Well, I told him I might fill in for a few weeks. 142 00:15:36,103 --> 00:15:39,230 Well, tell me this, if we lived over there in the city, 143 00:15:39,356 --> 00:15:41,774 - would you take the job then? - Sure. 144 00:15:42,275 --> 00:15:45,152 I mean, I was raised by a newspaperman, 145 00:15:45,904 --> 00:15:49,240 and, well, I don't know, I guess it just gets in your blood. 146 00:15:50,742 --> 00:15:52,993 That settles it then. Take the job. 147 00:15:53,703 --> 00:15:56,831 At least for the rest of the year. Me and young Mikey will go with you. 148 00:15:57,374 --> 00:16:01,168 - You're kidding. - No. Be good for him. Help him decide. 149 00:16:01,378 --> 00:16:02,378 Decide? 150 00:16:03,839 --> 00:16:05,381 Well, your dad owns a newspaper, right? 151 00:16:05,799 --> 00:16:09,176 You're his only child. Someday Mikey's gonna have to decide. 152 00:16:09,386 --> 00:16:11,345 Does he want to be an assistant crocodile wrangler, 153 00:16:12,389 --> 00:16:14,098 or the owner of a big-city newspaper? 154 00:16:14,850 --> 00:16:17,977 That's a tough one. And the travel will be good for him. 155 00:16:18,395 --> 00:16:21,188 Remember how my trip to New York 156 00:16:21,273 --> 00:16:23,691 sort of opened my eyes to the ways of the world? 157 00:16:24,901 --> 00:16:27,528 Made me a lot more... What's the word? 158 00:16:28,905 --> 00:16:31,157 - Sophisticated? - Yeah. 159 00:16:33,910 --> 00:16:36,120 By the way, Mick, what are you doing with that awful trap? 160 00:16:36,204 --> 00:16:38,164 You're not going to use that on some poor animal? 161 00:16:38,248 --> 00:16:39,623 No, I'm lending it to Donk. 162 00:16:40,000 --> 00:16:41,917 Some mongrel's been sneaking into the pub at night 163 00:16:42,002 --> 00:16:43,127 and knocking off his grog. 164 00:16:43,962 --> 00:16:47,423 Stealing Donk's beer, well, I guess they deserve to be mangled. 165 00:16:47,674 --> 00:16:48,674 Yeah. 166 00:16:48,758 --> 00:16:51,468 Well, what about you, Mikey? What do you think? 167 00:16:56,474 --> 00:16:58,726 How would you like to go live in California for a while? 168 00:16:59,186 --> 00:17:02,479 - They have earthquakes there, right? - Well, yeah, they have had. 169 00:17:03,231 --> 00:17:04,231 Cool. 170 00:17:04,482 --> 00:17:08,235 I thought you might say that. You're gonna have lots of fun. 171 00:17:09,654 --> 00:17:12,031 Actually, you're the one I'm worried about. 172 00:17:15,202 --> 00:17:16,285 No, I'm fine. 173 00:17:20,832 --> 00:17:23,834 Mick, I seem to remember after a few weeks in New York 174 00:17:23,919 --> 00:17:25,336 you did get pretty antsy. 175 00:17:26,338 --> 00:17:28,088 Yeah, a bit antsy. 176 00:17:30,425 --> 00:17:33,469 That's what I love about you, Mick. You're always so unselfish. 177 00:17:35,722 --> 00:17:36,722 No worries. 178 00:18:23,687 --> 00:18:25,938 Beverly Hills, eh? Home to the movie stars. 179 00:18:26,231 --> 00:18:27,398 A lot of 'em, yep. 180 00:18:28,400 --> 00:18:29,858 You're not in show business, are ya? 181 00:18:30,068 --> 00:18:31,735 No, I'm in the tourism game myself. 182 00:18:31,945 --> 00:18:33,028 - Hey, so am I. - Hey. 183 00:18:33,154 --> 00:18:36,573 When I'm out driving this. Actually, though, I'm a writer-actor. 184 00:18:37,033 --> 00:18:38,742 Just, you know, drive the limo between gigs. 185 00:18:38,827 --> 00:18:39,910 Make a lot of connections. 186 00:18:40,287 --> 00:18:42,204 Had Tom Arnold in the car this morning. 187 00:18:42,539 --> 00:18:43,580 Tom Arnold? 188 00:18:45,750 --> 00:18:48,752 Wife probably knows who he is. She's in the newspaper business. 189 00:18:49,004 --> 00:18:50,671 - A reporter. - Yeah. 190 00:18:51,840 --> 00:18:53,507 Here, take one of these. You never know. 191 00:18:57,679 --> 00:18:58,721 Thanks. 192 00:19:03,643 --> 00:19:04,643 There you go. 193 00:19:09,482 --> 00:19:10,482 That... That's nice. 194 00:19:10,567 --> 00:19:12,901 No, you can keep that. I got plenty of copies. 195 00:19:56,154 --> 00:19:57,279 Knock it off! 196 00:20:07,332 --> 00:20:11,251 Okay, tax relief plan. State tax only. No interest there. 197 00:20:11,669 --> 00:20:12,878 Traffic accidents. 198 00:20:12,962 --> 00:20:17,174 Okay, these figures comparing L.A. to New York drivers, that's good. 199 00:20:17,967 --> 00:20:18,967 Follow through on that. 200 00:20:19,052 --> 00:20:21,178 Great. So our policy hasn't changed then? 201 00:20:21,304 --> 00:20:22,304 How so? 202 00:20:22,389 --> 00:20:25,599 Well, it's like Mr. Zetland used to say, "We're a New York paper. 203 00:20:25,767 --> 00:20:28,519 "If the news ain't about New York, then who gives a rat's ass?" 204 00:20:29,104 --> 00:20:30,437 Or words to that effect. 205 00:20:31,064 --> 00:20:33,649 So he wasn't too happy about working in L.A.? 206 00:20:33,942 --> 00:20:35,567 No, no. Tom loved it here. 207 00:20:35,652 --> 00:20:40,614 No, he loved doing expos๏ฟฝ features and investigating scams and phonies. 208 00:20:41,282 --> 00:20:42,449 What was he working on? 209 00:20:43,201 --> 00:20:47,913 He was doing this feature on this new mini studio. 210 00:20:48,206 --> 00:20:50,207 He started to get really excited about it. 211 00:20:51,251 --> 00:20:52,793 I think he smelled a rat. 212 00:20:53,670 --> 00:20:56,171 But what it was about, only Tom knew. Here you go. 213 00:20:59,008 --> 00:21:03,011 Maybe you can find out what sparked his interest in there. Good luck. 214 00:21:06,724 --> 00:21:09,977 Hey, how are your boys doing? Are they out "exploring"? 215 00:21:11,187 --> 00:21:14,356 Yeah. Should be fun, too. For both of them. 216 00:21:16,025 --> 00:21:17,651 Come on, people, let's... 217 00:21:19,154 --> 00:21:23,699 Thank you. Spontaneous applause, thank you. 218 00:21:32,208 --> 00:21:33,208 Thank you. 219 00:21:34,878 --> 00:21:37,671 All right, a couple of tricks. Behind the back. 220 00:21:44,137 --> 00:21:46,513 All right, all right, all right, under the leg. 221 00:22:15,293 --> 00:22:17,628 Hey, Dad, look. There's those girls from Baywatch. 222 00:22:17,712 --> 00:22:18,712 What? 223 00:22:18,796 --> 00:22:22,841 Baywatch. On TV, you know? The girls that run funny, like this. 224 00:22:23,760 --> 00:22:27,221 And Donk and all the men in the pub go, "Whoa!" 225 00:22:27,430 --> 00:22:30,224 - What've you been doing in the pub? - Hey! 226 00:22:31,017 --> 00:22:32,017 I am so sorry. 227 00:22:32,268 --> 00:22:33,894 - It's okay. - Muscle fatigue. 228 00:22:34,187 --> 00:22:36,104 - You all right? - Hey, do you know what time it is? 229 00:22:37,357 --> 00:22:40,275 It's about 12:30, maybe 12:35. 230 00:22:40,902 --> 00:22:43,028 That's cute, but you're wearing a watch. 231 00:22:43,321 --> 00:22:45,572 That's not a watch, it's a compass. 232 00:22:46,324 --> 00:22:49,117 Yeah, I'm new in town. I just couldn't find my house without this. 233 00:22:49,702 --> 00:22:51,745 Really? So where's your house from here? 234 00:22:52,497 --> 00:22:57,251 11.5 miles, two degrees north northeast. Called Beverly Hills. 235 00:22:57,502 --> 00:23:00,379 Bev Hills? So, you have a nice home? 236 00:23:00,588 --> 00:23:04,466 - Yeah, we got eight dunnies. - Yeah, that's eight bathrooms. 237 00:23:04,884 --> 00:23:07,469 - Nice. This... This your boy? - Yeah, that's Mikey. 238 00:23:08,680 --> 00:23:11,765 - So, you married? - No, he's not married. 239 00:23:11,849 --> 00:23:15,102 - So you got custody? - Yeah. Well, Mikey's my son. 240 00:23:15,228 --> 00:23:17,938 - Right. So you're a good parent? - Well, I would say. 241 00:23:18,022 --> 00:23:22,776 Right. This is too good. I finally bump into a cute cowboy. 242 00:23:23,069 --> 00:23:25,153 He's a little more Robert Redford's vintage 243 00:23:25,238 --> 00:23:26,488 than Brad Pitt's, but that's okay, 244 00:23:26,573 --> 00:23:27,990 'cause he's got a mansion in Beverly Hills, 245 00:23:28,074 --> 00:23:29,741 and plus he's got custody of his kid. 246 00:23:29,826 --> 00:23:31,994 That means he'd be a good dad to my Cindy and this is... 247 00:23:32,453 --> 00:23:33,453 There's a catch, right? 248 00:23:33,913 --> 00:23:35,831 Nothing this good ever happens to me. 249 00:23:36,541 --> 00:23:40,002 Are you... You're not available? You're... You're gay, right? 250 00:23:41,588 --> 00:23:43,422 Most of the time, pretty happy, yeah. 251 00:23:43,881 --> 00:23:44,965 Of course. 252 00:23:45,842 --> 00:23:48,218 Cute cowboy, Venice Beach, had to be gay. 253 00:23:48,595 --> 00:23:49,803 What was I thinking? 254 00:23:51,848 --> 00:23:56,143 - Boy, she was a chatterbox. - Yeah, mate. American woman. 255 00:23:58,479 --> 00:24:00,981 - She's got a nice ass. - Yeah. 256 00:24:02,108 --> 00:24:04,318 Hey, you gotta stop hanging around that pub. 257 00:24:07,739 --> 00:24:08,947 Who taught you that? Nugget? 258 00:24:11,868 --> 00:24:15,746 - Find anything fishy? - Yeah. Listen to this. 259 00:24:16,789 --> 00:24:20,250 Silvergate Pictures make their first movie, right? Lethal Agent. 260 00:24:20,460 --> 00:24:21,627 And it's a total bomb. 261 00:24:22,211 --> 00:24:24,755 So the very next picture they make is Lethal Agent ll... 262 00:24:25,381 --> 00:24:27,883 Which, of course, goes straight to video where no one rents it. 263 00:24:29,218 --> 00:24:32,387 And guess what they're doing now to save their reputation? 264 00:24:33,514 --> 00:24:34,514 Yeah. 265 00:24:36,225 --> 00:24:38,268 I don't know. Did Tom talk to these guys? 266 00:24:38,353 --> 00:24:39,478 Well, yeah. I mean, 267 00:24:39,562 --> 00:24:42,773 I think he spoke to everybody from the president of the studio down. 268 00:24:42,899 --> 00:24:45,233 That's when he seemed to get really excited about the story. 269 00:24:46,611 --> 00:24:50,572 All I can see here is a bunch of really dumb business decisions. 270 00:24:50,823 --> 00:24:52,449 But, of course, that's not illegal. 271 00:24:52,617 --> 00:24:55,035 Well, you know, that's the research that I did for him. 272 00:24:55,119 --> 00:24:57,871 Whatever Tom was working on is probably in his PC. 273 00:24:57,955 --> 00:25:00,749 So, I could get the disk from his house, if you're interested. 274 00:25:00,875 --> 00:25:01,958 That'd be great. 275 00:25:02,960 --> 00:25:05,754 And I notice they're having a "meet and greet" 276 00:25:05,838 --> 00:25:07,547 for press and industry people. 277 00:25:08,466 --> 00:25:10,133 Do you know who would normally cover that? 278 00:25:10,259 --> 00:25:11,927 Fay Olson does entertainment. 279 00:25:12,011 --> 00:25:15,263 Okay. Tell her she can have the night off, and I'll fill in. 280 00:25:20,937 --> 00:25:24,398 - Hey, Dad, what sort of car is that? - I can't look now, mate. 281 00:25:25,149 --> 00:25:27,943 These California people are nice and friendly and polite... 282 00:25:28,903 --> 00:25:30,028 Till they get in their cars, 283 00:25:30,947 --> 00:25:32,989 - then they turn into crazed wombats. - Quick, Dad, stop! 284 00:25:33,074 --> 00:25:34,324 - There's a dog in the road. - Where? 285 00:25:48,881 --> 00:25:51,007 - So where's the dog? - He ducked in there. 286 00:25:51,175 --> 00:25:52,300 I'll get him. 287 00:25:54,095 --> 00:25:55,095 Be careful. 288 00:25:59,517 --> 00:26:03,186 All right, everybody, stay back. Don't worry, we'll get him. 289 00:26:04,772 --> 00:26:05,772 I'm on it. 290 00:26:06,190 --> 00:26:08,150 - What's the hell's going on up there? - Come on, buddy! 291 00:26:08,234 --> 00:26:09,735 The guy said there's something on the road. 292 00:26:10,111 --> 00:26:11,361 He looks like a nut to me. 293 00:26:11,904 --> 00:26:13,905 - Probably a bomb or something. - It's a what? 294 00:26:14,031 --> 00:26:17,451 - He says it's a bomb! - It's a bomb! It's gonna blow! 295 00:26:23,291 --> 00:26:24,791 Come here, boy. Come on. 296 00:26:26,335 --> 00:26:27,878 It won't come out. He's scared. 297 00:26:29,338 --> 00:26:31,965 That's not a dog. That's a... 298 00:26:32,717 --> 00:26:35,469 I don't know what it is. Some kind of possum maybe. 299 00:26:36,846 --> 00:26:38,638 I've never seen a black and white possum. 300 00:26:38,890 --> 00:26:40,182 I think it's a skunk. 301 00:26:41,225 --> 00:26:43,435 How do you know what a skunk looks like? We don't have 'em at home. 302 00:26:43,936 --> 00:26:46,605 It looks like Pep๏ฟฝ Le Pew in the cartoons on TV. 303 00:26:49,066 --> 00:26:50,776 I thought skunks were supposed to stink 304 00:26:52,862 --> 00:26:53,862 Don't stink. 305 00:27:00,119 --> 00:27:02,662 Come on, boy. Come on. 306 00:27:15,092 --> 00:27:16,843 Got the response... 307 00:27:18,012 --> 00:27:20,472 Possible explosive device and hostage situation. 308 00:27:21,057 --> 00:27:22,057 There we go. 309 00:27:23,851 --> 00:27:25,060 No wonder he's scared. 310 00:27:26,229 --> 00:27:27,687 Those bloody helicopters. 311 00:27:30,566 --> 00:27:31,608 Take off! 312 00:27:34,779 --> 00:27:37,030 We have a very tricky situation for the police here. 313 00:27:37,114 --> 00:27:39,991 The suspect appears to be holding a young boy hostage. 314 00:27:43,246 --> 00:27:45,080 Stay where you are! 315 00:27:45,540 --> 00:27:47,332 Put the bomb down! 316 00:27:47,458 --> 00:27:48,500 What? 317 00:27:51,045 --> 00:27:53,547 That's not a bomb. That's a cat. 318 00:27:58,553 --> 00:28:01,179 See, just like at home. The policeman is your friend. 319 00:28:01,264 --> 00:28:02,389 They're here to help us. 320 00:28:05,101 --> 00:28:07,602 That's not a cat. That's a skunk. 321 00:28:10,773 --> 00:28:12,065 You can take it from here, guys. 322 00:28:14,610 --> 00:28:17,028 Mike, I wouldn't mention this to your mom. 323 00:28:17,822 --> 00:28:20,949 She probably wouldn't understand. It's man stuff. 324 00:28:21,492 --> 00:28:24,286 And of course, at that stage, early this afternoon, 325 00:28:24,537 --> 00:28:28,707 we had no idea that the bomb was, in fact, a skunk. 326 00:28:28,916 --> 00:28:32,127 Officers reluctantly placed the skunk in a squad car 327 00:28:32,211 --> 00:28:34,462 to await the arrival of animal control. 328 00:28:34,547 --> 00:28:37,048 In the meantime, it backed up traffic on the 101 329 00:28:37,133 --> 00:28:40,635 from Calabasas to Pasadena. It was the worst traffic jam... 330 00:28:40,720 --> 00:28:44,097 - What are you doing, Mikey? - It's okay, love, it's me. 331 00:28:45,600 --> 00:28:47,893 Mick, are you sure you want to come tonight? 332 00:28:48,728 --> 00:28:51,479 I mean, it's a social thing, but it'll be work for me. 333 00:28:51,606 --> 00:28:52,898 Yeah, I'm looking forward to it. 334 00:28:52,982 --> 00:28:56,109 You know, to see if the local people are as friendly as New Yorkers. 335 00:28:56,652 --> 00:28:58,945 Well, I hope your son feels the same way. 336 00:28:59,030 --> 00:29:00,572 He starts school on Wednesday. 337 00:29:02,325 --> 00:29:05,869 No worries. He's... He's just like me, really. 338 00:29:06,329 --> 00:29:10,832 From what I hear, he has enough charm to stop a skunk from spraying him. 339 00:29:11,042 --> 00:29:12,042 Yeah, well, you know, 340 00:29:12,126 --> 00:29:14,044 - we were roaring down the freeway... - It's okay. 341 00:29:15,004 --> 00:29:19,758 - He looked really cute on TV. - Bloody television. 342 00:29:45,326 --> 00:29:46,534 Not this time, pal. 343 00:29:48,579 --> 00:29:50,413 - Mick! - Call the cops! 344 00:29:51,082 --> 00:29:53,833 Let him go. He's the valet. He's supposed to park the car. 345 00:29:53,918 --> 00:29:55,460 Yeah, yeah, take it easy, dude. 346 00:29:58,714 --> 00:29:59,714 - Tip him. - Sorry. 347 00:30:02,593 --> 00:30:05,178 - Honest mistake. - Sorry. 348 00:30:08,474 --> 00:30:09,474 Valet? 349 00:30:16,774 --> 00:30:17,774 - Picture, please. - Sure. 350 00:30:22,363 --> 00:30:23,571 Folks mind if we get a shot? 351 00:30:24,907 --> 00:30:25,991 Don't worry about me. 352 00:30:26,117 --> 00:30:27,826 I'll just get a drink, blend right in. 353 00:30:27,910 --> 00:30:28,910 Okay. 354 00:30:29,453 --> 00:30:31,746 I'll come and get you after I've done the formalities. 355 00:30:37,837 --> 00:30:39,337 Big smile for the camera, please. 356 00:30:51,726 --> 00:30:53,226 All right, that's your Evian, 357 00:30:53,310 --> 00:30:55,603 and this here's your sparkling mineral water with a twist. 358 00:30:55,980 --> 00:30:57,188 And a straight club soda. 359 00:31:00,651 --> 00:31:02,861 So, you having a drink or doing your laundry? 360 00:31:07,742 --> 00:31:09,075 G'day. Mick Dundee. 361 00:31:09,493 --> 00:31:10,493 - And you're... - Tony. 362 00:31:10,578 --> 00:31:11,745 What can I get for you, Mr. Dundee? 363 00:31:12,163 --> 00:31:13,830 Just a cold beer will do, mate. Thanks. 364 00:31:15,166 --> 00:31:18,209 That's typical of L.A. today. Health nuts. 365 00:31:18,544 --> 00:31:21,296 Worried about what they drink, worried about what they eat. 366 00:31:22,840 --> 00:31:25,216 I used to be like that till I found the answer. 367 00:31:27,636 --> 00:31:29,888 And what's the answer? 368 00:31:30,181 --> 00:31:31,181 Coffee. 369 00:31:32,266 --> 00:31:35,435 Eat and drink whatever you please and then flush it out with coffee. 370 00:31:36,520 --> 00:31:38,229 So you just drink lots of coffee. 371 00:31:38,856 --> 00:31:43,610 No. You don't drink it. I'm talking colonics. 372 00:31:44,570 --> 00:31:47,697 A good coffee enema leaves you clean as a whistle. 373 00:31:49,200 --> 00:31:50,200 Bottoms up. 374 00:31:56,707 --> 00:31:58,917 Hey, Tony. An enema... 375 00:31:59,668 --> 00:32:00,710 Isn't that where they shove a hose 376 00:32:00,795 --> 00:32:01,878 - up the old... - Yep. 377 00:32:02,379 --> 00:32:05,548 - Lots of people swear by 'em. - With coffee? 378 00:32:09,053 --> 00:32:12,013 - Cream and sugar? - It's L.A. 379 00:32:16,644 --> 00:32:18,019 Excuse me, Mr. Rothman. 380 00:32:20,523 --> 00:32:22,065 I'd love to introduce you to someone. 381 00:32:22,233 --> 00:32:24,943 This is Ms. Sue Charleton from Newsday. 382 00:32:25,569 --> 00:32:27,821 - Hello. - Arnan Rothman. Delighted. 383 00:32:27,905 --> 00:32:31,324 Didi tells me that you've replaced our late friend, Tom Zetland. 384 00:32:32,118 --> 00:32:33,493 - Excuse me. - That's a damn shame. 385 00:32:33,577 --> 00:32:36,913 He was a good man and he really knew his way around this business. 386 00:32:37,790 --> 00:32:40,750 Well, I'm afraid I come up a bit short in that department. 387 00:32:41,836 --> 00:32:44,838 Actually, I was hoping maybe you could help me out. 388 00:32:47,550 --> 00:32:51,553 - Are you in the cast of this flick? - Me? No, I'm socializing. 389 00:32:51,637 --> 00:32:54,472 Networking. Me, too. Have you seen any of these masterpieces? 390 00:32:54,723 --> 00:32:55,807 - No. - Don't. 391 00:32:55,891 --> 00:32:57,767 Unbelievable schlock. I kid you not. 392 00:32:57,852 --> 00:32:59,853 Makes you embarrassed to be in the business. 393 00:33:00,229 --> 00:33:03,189 The only thing I've seen worse than Lethal Agent was Lethal Agent ll. 394 00:33:03,732 --> 00:33:05,692 I read the script on this one, and it's even worse. 395 00:33:05,776 --> 00:33:07,402 I don't know how these clowns stay in business. 396 00:33:09,071 --> 00:33:11,281 I suppose you've heard, then, they're making Lethal Agent IV. 397 00:33:12,366 --> 00:33:13,366 What? 398 00:33:14,326 --> 00:33:16,911 No one told me. Do you know if they're casting yet? 399 00:33:18,038 --> 00:33:19,164 I gotta call my agent. 400 00:33:21,167 --> 00:33:23,668 I'm planning on following through on Tom's story, 401 00:33:23,752 --> 00:33:26,337 more about your film company than this particular film. 402 00:33:26,505 --> 00:33:28,089 We shot the whole thing in Greece. 403 00:33:31,760 --> 00:33:36,264 Allow me to introduce Milos Drubnick, our international vice president. 404 00:33:36,348 --> 00:33:37,348 Sue Charleton. 405 00:33:37,641 --> 00:33:40,351 I'm delighted to meet American movie star. 406 00:33:40,436 --> 00:33:41,978 I'm a big fan, all your films. 407 00:33:42,438 --> 00:33:45,481 Well, that's very kind of you, but I'm a journalist. 408 00:33:46,483 --> 00:33:47,692 Sue's from Newsday. 409 00:33:50,696 --> 00:33:53,323 Milos handles all our Eastern European activity. 410 00:33:53,449 --> 00:33:55,283 I could not work over there without him. 411 00:33:56,660 --> 00:33:57,660 You'll excuse me. 412 00:34:01,373 --> 00:34:04,125 Well, I don't want to monopolize all your time here. 413 00:34:04,543 --> 00:34:06,419 I was hoping we could catch up at the studio 414 00:34:06,503 --> 00:34:08,254 - when it's convenient. - Absolutely. 415 00:34:10,132 --> 00:34:11,466 That's just the way they do things. 416 00:34:13,177 --> 00:34:14,219 You don't want that, love. 417 00:34:15,304 --> 00:34:17,555 Get some of that free food in you. You'll feel a lot better. 418 00:34:18,265 --> 00:34:19,265 You're welcome. 419 00:34:21,518 --> 00:34:25,563 - Hey, you're from Down Under, right? - Yeah. 420 00:34:26,106 --> 00:34:28,191 I don't suppose you know Mel Gibson. 421 00:34:28,525 --> 00:34:32,904 Mel Gibson? Ought to. Bailed him out of jail twice. 422 00:34:33,155 --> 00:34:35,281 You're kidding. You really do know him? 423 00:34:35,616 --> 00:34:37,575 I could tell you some tales about Mad Mel. 424 00:34:37,785 --> 00:34:38,826 Please do. 425 00:34:39,703 --> 00:34:41,537 I thought you said that we were finished 426 00:34:41,622 --> 00:34:43,456 with these prying Newsday people. 427 00:34:43,791 --> 00:34:46,876 She's just following up on the original story. I'll handle it. 428 00:34:46,961 --> 00:34:49,587 No. Now she want to come snooping around the studio. 429 00:34:49,672 --> 00:34:50,838 You should say no. 430 00:34:50,923 --> 00:34:53,341 Look, we're the new boys in town, right? 431 00:34:53,509 --> 00:34:55,510 We're supposed to be begging for publicity. 432 00:34:55,594 --> 00:34:57,887 We start banning the press, they're gonna be all over us. 433 00:34:59,598 --> 00:35:00,682 Leave this to me. 434 00:35:01,100 --> 00:35:02,350 So he takes his shoes off... 435 00:35:03,602 --> 00:35:04,644 - Thanks, Tony. - You're welcome. 436 00:35:05,312 --> 00:35:07,855 Runs outside stark naked. 437 00:35:09,275 --> 00:35:12,026 Sets fire to the building and burns it to the bloody ground. 438 00:35:15,656 --> 00:35:16,656 He's a mad bugger. 439 00:35:19,368 --> 00:35:20,368 Excuse me. 440 00:35:21,870 --> 00:35:24,330 Mel Gibson's best friend. They're practically brothers. 441 00:35:24,581 --> 00:35:25,581 I've seen them together... 442 00:35:25,708 --> 00:35:27,625 Just telling 'em a few tales about Mel Gibson. 443 00:35:28,252 --> 00:35:30,628 - You don't know Mel Gibson. - Yeah, I do. 444 00:35:30,713 --> 00:35:32,839 You know him, too. Met him at Donk's pub. 445 00:35:33,841 --> 00:35:36,801 Mel Gibson, tall redheaded fellow, walks with a limp. 446 00:35:37,928 --> 00:35:41,431 "Mal. " Malcolm Gibson. Not Mel Gibson. 447 00:35:41,515 --> 00:35:42,557 Yeah, Mal Gibson. 448 00:35:43,600 --> 00:35:46,144 They know about him over here. Small world, isn't it? 449 00:35:46,520 --> 00:35:51,190 Hey, Mick. Mick, you give me a call anytime. 450 00:35:52,609 --> 00:35:56,029 Okay, dude. Hey, maybe we'll do lunch. 451 00:35:58,741 --> 00:36:02,327 - Mick, you're starting to scare me. - I like Hollywood. 452 00:36:05,873 --> 00:36:08,291 Good afternoon. Welcome to Beverly Hills. 453 00:36:08,876 --> 00:36:09,876 Thanks. 454 00:36:13,547 --> 00:36:16,341 So, your story on the film company just got red hot. 455 00:36:16,884 --> 00:36:19,469 Tom Zetland's place was robbed, and they took everything. 456 00:36:19,887 --> 00:36:24,349 Oh, my God, that's terrible. But how does it make the story hot? 457 00:36:25,351 --> 00:36:27,101 Well, Tom is accidentally killed. 458 00:36:27,644 --> 00:36:29,729 Coincidentally, his place is cleaned out, 459 00:36:29,813 --> 00:36:31,773 leaving no clues to what he's working on. 460 00:36:33,484 --> 00:36:37,403 Maybe Tom was on to something big, and they had to shut him up. 461 00:36:38,238 --> 00:36:40,323 You think the film people had him killed? 462 00:36:41,867 --> 00:36:42,950 It's possible. 463 00:36:43,911 --> 00:36:46,245 I had a bad vibe about this from the start. 464 00:36:46,955 --> 00:36:48,539 I think you should be careful going out there. 465 00:36:49,124 --> 00:36:52,126 Well, I'm not exactly going into a Mafia stronghold. 466 00:36:52,878 --> 00:36:54,921 I'm interviewing a studio head on the lot. 467 00:36:55,047 --> 00:36:57,632 I'm even bringing my family along. They're gonna do the tour. 468 00:37:07,434 --> 00:37:11,229 Well, all righty, then. Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, boy and girls, 469 00:37:11,522 --> 00:37:13,398 to the Paramount Pictures tour. 470 00:37:13,857 --> 00:37:15,775 This is where the magic happens, people. 471 00:37:15,859 --> 00:37:17,568 But before we actually begin, 472 00:37:17,861 --> 00:37:20,154 I'm gonna ask you all to raise your right hand. 473 00:37:24,868 --> 00:37:27,578 Okay, cool. Now what you're about to witness 474 00:37:27,663 --> 00:37:29,956 are some of the biggest secrets of moviemaking. 475 00:37:30,082 --> 00:37:32,083 So I must ask that all of you swear 476 00:37:32,167 --> 00:37:34,544 not to reveal anything you may witness here today. 477 00:37:35,796 --> 00:37:37,088 Do you swear? 478 00:37:40,426 --> 00:37:41,551 Just say, "I do. " 479 00:37:42,302 --> 00:37:44,220 - I do. - Okay. 480 00:37:44,721 --> 00:37:45,721 Righty ho, Jim. 481 00:37:57,067 --> 00:37:59,068 You're in for a special treat here today, people, 482 00:37:59,153 --> 00:38:02,530 'cause just up ahead we're actually filming a giant crowd scene 483 00:38:02,865 --> 00:38:06,242 for the latest Silvergate Studio picture, Lethal Agent lll. 484 00:38:06,326 --> 00:38:08,119 I told you we should've gone to Universal. 485 00:38:08,745 --> 00:38:12,123 Because quite simply, losses on the first two movies 486 00:38:12,207 --> 00:38:15,042 are amortized into the cost of the franchise. 487 00:38:15,711 --> 00:38:18,254 We're making this movie for practically nothing. 488 00:38:19,423 --> 00:38:22,425 Okay, but still, wouldn't it be cheaper to make your films 489 00:38:22,801 --> 00:38:25,845 either here or in Eastern Europe instead of both places? 490 00:38:25,929 --> 00:38:28,598 Sure, but our movies are set in Eastern Europe. 491 00:38:28,724 --> 00:38:30,600 You can't fake the locations here? 492 00:38:31,477 --> 00:38:33,728 I mean, they're shooting an African jungle next door. 493 00:38:34,480 --> 00:38:36,814 Sue, can you and I talk off the record? 494 00:38:37,774 --> 00:38:39,358 Darling, will you excuse us for a minute? 495 00:38:39,443 --> 00:38:40,485 Sure. 496 00:38:42,446 --> 00:38:48,868 Quite frankly, the success or failure of these films 497 00:38:49,036 --> 00:38:50,703 is of little importance to us. 498 00:38:53,499 --> 00:38:54,790 We're after bigger fish. 499 00:38:56,877 --> 00:39:02,048 There are over 300 million people in what was once the Soviet Bloc. 500 00:39:02,716 --> 00:39:05,551 People who are starved of entertainment. 501 00:39:05,636 --> 00:39:10,097 Movies shot in their own backyard, starring their own people. 502 00:39:10,724 --> 00:39:13,809 I'm talking about building major studios, cineplex chains, 503 00:39:13,894 --> 00:39:15,061 even theme parks. 504 00:39:15,479 --> 00:39:20,900 The deal I am talking about will make Euro Disney seem penny ante. 505 00:39:21,443 --> 00:39:24,570 Well, this is a great story. A Russian Hollywood. 506 00:39:25,864 --> 00:39:27,323 And when do we go on record? 507 00:39:30,869 --> 00:39:32,203 Two weeks, tops. 508 00:39:32,621 --> 00:39:33,621 But for you, 509 00:39:35,999 --> 00:39:37,875 24 hours before the rest of the world. 510 00:39:38,794 --> 00:39:40,795 Exclusive to Newsday. 511 00:39:42,464 --> 00:39:43,506 And in return? 512 00:39:44,841 --> 00:39:47,343 Postpone the piece you've already started. 513 00:39:47,469 --> 00:39:51,556 Right now, what is it? It's a... It's a story about a small-time studio 514 00:39:51,640 --> 00:39:53,766 and their two unsuccessful movies. 515 00:39:55,060 --> 00:39:56,060 Who cares? 516 00:39:57,354 --> 00:39:58,396 What do you say? 517 00:39:59,815 --> 00:40:04,402 Well, if it's a Newsday exclusive, I guess you got a deal. 518 00:40:06,572 --> 00:40:09,365 Claire, why don't you take Ms. Charleton down to the set. 519 00:40:09,449 --> 00:40:12,410 You can see the glamorous side of the business. 520 00:40:13,203 --> 00:40:14,287 I'll be in touch. 521 00:40:28,844 --> 00:40:29,844 You are good. 522 00:40:30,512 --> 00:40:33,723 ...where we can transform an ordinary man or woman 523 00:40:34,016 --> 00:40:35,850 into an ape or a clown. 524 00:40:37,185 --> 00:40:40,354 All righty, then. Now, before we enter this next portal, 525 00:40:40,772 --> 00:40:44,650 it is my duty to warn you that several dangerous jungle creatures 526 00:40:44,901 --> 00:40:46,319 have been sighted on the loose, 527 00:40:46,403 --> 00:40:49,196 so, please keep inside the tram at all times. 528 00:40:49,448 --> 00:40:51,782 I don't want to lose anyone, again. 529 00:40:52,993 --> 00:40:56,370 - Dad, do you have your big knife? - Didn't think I'd need it here. 530 00:40:57,080 --> 00:40:59,665 I might have my pocket knife. What do you need it for? 531 00:40:59,958 --> 00:41:01,834 I mean, in case the jungle animals attack. 532 00:41:02,336 --> 00:41:03,419 I think we'll be all right. 533 00:41:04,630 --> 00:41:07,882 Okay, look out, folks, it's a giant deadly anaconda! 534 00:41:18,518 --> 00:41:22,938 - Well, that's awesome, dude. - Sorry, reflex action. 535 00:41:23,315 --> 00:41:25,107 Okay. Cool. 536 00:41:25,609 --> 00:41:26,692 Let's get outta here. 537 00:41:29,946 --> 00:41:30,946 G'day. 538 00:41:32,616 --> 00:41:35,576 - Was that more man stuff, Dad? - You got that right, mate. 539 00:41:42,751 --> 00:41:45,461 - Hey, you two. Did you have fun? - Yeah, it was cool. 540 00:41:46,004 --> 00:41:48,005 Yeah. So how'd your interview go? 541 00:41:51,385 --> 00:41:52,426 Creepy. 542 00:41:53,845 --> 00:41:56,889 Did you ever talk to someone and think everything they're saying is a lie? 543 00:41:57,849 --> 00:41:58,933 Yeah. Nugget. 544 00:42:00,060 --> 00:42:03,020 Well, Nugget's harmless. This guy... 545 00:42:04,314 --> 00:42:05,314 You know what you should do? 546 00:42:06,149 --> 00:42:07,817 Your paper's got police connections, right? 547 00:42:08,527 --> 00:42:10,820 You get the cops to do a background check on him. 548 00:42:11,530 --> 00:42:13,364 That's the way they do it on NYPD Blue. 549 00:42:15,701 --> 00:42:19,578 Well, I see Mikey's not the only one glued to the TV all day long. 550 00:42:20,539 --> 00:42:23,874 Yeah, but we only watch educational programs. Right, mate? 551 00:42:24,000 --> 00:42:25,376 Yeah. Like wrestling. 552 00:42:26,002 --> 00:42:29,046 "Can you smell what The Rock is cooking?" 553 00:42:33,510 --> 00:42:36,637 - Well, did he behave today? - Yeah, he was good as gold. 554 00:42:37,180 --> 00:42:39,432 I wasn't talking to you. I was talking to Mikey. 555 00:42:41,309 --> 00:42:43,561 And no more TV. You start school tomorrow. 556 00:43:07,377 --> 00:43:09,128 G'day. Mick Dundee. 557 00:43:10,881 --> 00:43:13,090 Here to pick up my ankle biter. It's his first day. 558 00:43:13,842 --> 00:43:15,801 Barry Katz. What grade's he in? 559 00:43:16,428 --> 00:43:18,345 - Fourth. - Same as my boy. 560 00:43:18,638 --> 00:43:21,432 - My boy's in the third. Eric Berry. - Hi, Eric. 561 00:43:21,933 --> 00:43:23,100 Well, you look like an outdoorsman, Mick. 562 00:43:23,185 --> 00:43:24,977 What do you think of this whole survival camp idea? 563 00:43:25,479 --> 00:43:26,479 What is it? 564 00:43:26,563 --> 00:43:28,022 Well, the school's putting it on this summer. 565 00:43:28,106 --> 00:43:29,732 Teach the kids how to survive in the woods. 566 00:43:29,816 --> 00:43:33,235 Fishing, making campfires. Dads are welcome. 567 00:43:34,237 --> 00:43:35,321 I think it's a great idea. 568 00:43:36,156 --> 00:43:37,865 Gives them a chance to get in touch with nature. 569 00:43:38,241 --> 00:43:40,451 - I'm gonna take young Gary along. - Good for you. 570 00:43:40,744 --> 00:43:43,245 Couple of weeks in the bush, you and your boy, you'll both love it. 571 00:43:44,664 --> 00:43:46,749 You ever take your boy into the Outback where you were? 572 00:43:46,917 --> 00:43:47,958 Down Under? 573 00:43:50,128 --> 00:43:51,128 All the time. 574 00:43:51,838 --> 00:43:54,006 Just last month, I took him into the bush. 575 00:43:55,133 --> 00:43:57,134 Taught him how to kill a wild boar with a stick. 576 00:43:58,345 --> 00:44:00,179 Kill a boar? But he's, like, nine years old? 577 00:44:01,431 --> 00:44:04,934 Yeah, well, you know what they say? Better late than never, eh? 578 00:44:08,271 --> 00:44:09,271 See you later, fellas. 579 00:44:14,486 --> 00:44:17,780 Hey, Dad. Miss Mathis wants to talk to you. I'll meet you over there. 580 00:44:18,990 --> 00:44:20,491 Dorothy Mathis, Mr. Charleton. 581 00:44:20,784 --> 00:44:22,493 How do you do? Actually, it's Mick Dundee. 582 00:44:22,786 --> 00:44:25,996 - But I'm Mikey's dad. - Mr. Dundee. right. 583 00:44:26,081 --> 00:44:30,668 Well, first off, Mikey is a lovely boy. Bright, friendly. 584 00:44:31,294 --> 00:44:35,047 There's just one small problem, one we run into all the time here. 585 00:44:35,799 --> 00:44:37,424 We call it the "Hollywood syndrome. " 586 00:44:37,926 --> 00:44:40,052 Like when a dad plays a policeman in a movie, 587 00:44:40,136 --> 00:44:43,180 the children often believe he's actually a policeman. 588 00:44:43,265 --> 00:44:45,307 Right, you've got a lot of actors' kids here. 589 00:44:45,725 --> 00:44:47,184 Yeah, well, I'm not in the movie business. 590 00:44:47,477 --> 00:44:49,979 I'm in the tourism business. Not so glamorous. 591 00:44:50,230 --> 00:44:51,272 Exactly. 592 00:44:51,481 --> 00:44:53,232 Which is why your son tries to make it sound 593 00:44:53,316 --> 00:44:55,234 a bit more colorful than it really is. 594 00:44:55,735 --> 00:44:58,612 Now, it seems harmless, but little fibs can grow. 595 00:45:00,574 --> 00:45:01,574 What's he been saying? 596 00:45:02,576 --> 00:45:04,577 I'm afraid he told everyone you're a hunter, 597 00:45:04,870 --> 00:45:07,037 and you hunt and kill crocodiles. 598 00:45:09,875 --> 00:45:11,041 He knows better than that. 599 00:45:11,209 --> 00:45:15,129 Crocodiles are protected. I don't kill 'em. I catch 'em alive. 600 00:45:17,841 --> 00:45:19,800 Well, yes, of course. 601 00:45:20,886 --> 00:45:23,262 I'll talk to him. There'll be no more fibs. 602 00:45:23,430 --> 00:45:24,805 Really nice to meet you, Dorothy. 603 00:45:30,312 --> 00:45:31,437 Looks like a hunter. 604 00:45:36,484 --> 00:45:37,568 Nice butt. 605 00:45:39,738 --> 00:45:43,407 Dad, will you tell the teachers to call me Dundee, not Charleton? 606 00:45:43,700 --> 00:45:47,369 Sure. We just had to enroll you at school under your mother's name 607 00:45:47,454 --> 00:45:49,413 'cause that's your legal name over here. 608 00:45:51,625 --> 00:45:53,125 Is that 'cause you won't marry Mum? 609 00:45:53,543 --> 00:45:55,252 Oh, no, we're married... Sorta. 610 00:45:55,795 --> 00:45:57,338 We just haven't done the legal bit yet. 611 00:45:58,006 --> 00:45:59,089 So what'd the kids at school say 612 00:45:59,174 --> 00:46:01,091 when you told them your dad was a crocodile hunter? 613 00:46:01,760 --> 00:46:04,428 They said, "Well, what's he doing in Beverly Hills?" 614 00:46:05,931 --> 00:46:06,931 Smart kids. 615 00:46:14,856 --> 00:46:17,107 Hey, Dad, what's that man doing? 616 00:46:18,902 --> 00:46:21,278 I don't know. Let's go and ask him. 617 00:46:26,493 --> 00:46:29,203 Excuse me, mister. What are you doing? 618 00:46:29,955 --> 00:46:31,580 Well, I'm meditating, young man. 619 00:46:32,123 --> 00:46:33,332 What's meditating? 620 00:46:34,125 --> 00:46:37,294 Meditating is a special place I go in my mind 621 00:46:37,379 --> 00:46:40,756 where there's no distraction, and I receive a great source of power. 622 00:46:42,133 --> 00:46:44,468 Cool. Can you show us how, please? 623 00:46:44,552 --> 00:46:47,262 Sure. Come forward and have a seat. 624 00:46:49,432 --> 00:46:52,559 - My name's Mikey. What's yours? - Hi, Mikey. I'm Mike. 625 00:46:54,229 --> 00:46:56,105 Hi, Mike. I'm Mick, Mikey's dad. 626 00:46:56,481 --> 00:46:58,023 Mikey, Mick, Mike. 627 00:46:58,483 --> 00:47:00,484 - You gotta be kidding me, right? - No. 628 00:47:00,694 --> 00:47:04,822 Okay, okay. Hold your legs like in a Buddha position, 629 00:47:05,240 --> 00:47:07,741 grab your ankles to save yourself some discomfort, 630 00:47:07,826 --> 00:47:11,662 and we're gonna take it easy... Close your eyes, relax. 631 00:47:13,248 --> 00:47:14,581 Inhale the positivity. 632 00:47:15,542 --> 00:47:16,959 Exhale the negativity. 633 00:47:18,003 --> 00:47:19,545 Inhale the positivity, 634 00:47:20,714 --> 00:47:22,381 exhale the negativity. 635 00:47:25,093 --> 00:47:27,803 Open your eyes. Wake up. Relax. 636 00:47:28,013 --> 00:47:31,724 - How do you feel? - Very powerful. 637 00:47:31,850 --> 00:47:35,477 And that's the ticket, daddy-o. Power. It's all in the power. 638 00:47:36,271 --> 00:47:40,024 Mikey, would you just hurry up ahead. I need to talk to Mike for a minute. 639 00:47:40,233 --> 00:47:41,233 - Okay. - In private. 640 00:47:42,819 --> 00:47:44,528 - Thanks, Mike. - You're welcome, Mikey. 641 00:47:44,612 --> 00:47:46,280 - See ya. - Take care, buddy. 642 00:47:48,908 --> 00:47:50,242 Now, Mike, I need a favor. 643 00:47:50,577 --> 00:47:52,786 You know, Mick, everybody needs a favor from me. 644 00:47:52,912 --> 00:47:54,705 Well, I need you to help me up. My knees have locked. 645 00:47:56,124 --> 00:47:58,292 That's my bad right there. You got it, buddy. 646 00:48:00,253 --> 00:48:02,337 - I didn't want my kid to see. - There you go. 647 00:48:04,299 --> 00:48:05,299 Thank you. 648 00:48:07,177 --> 00:48:10,888 Hey, Dad, did you see the size of Mike's muscles? They were huge. 649 00:48:10,972 --> 00:48:15,225 Yeah. Now you see, you should never judge a book by its cover. 650 00:48:15,393 --> 00:48:18,812 That Mike, big man, built like a brick dunny, 651 00:48:19,481 --> 00:48:22,274 but I could tell straightaway he was a gentle man. 652 00:48:23,359 --> 00:48:28,238 He wouldn't hurt a fly. I just know people. It's a gift. 653 00:48:31,159 --> 00:48:32,951 All right, I need you guys to tear this place apart. 654 00:48:33,411 --> 00:48:36,246 It's the bowling ball. Pure heroin. 655 00:48:38,083 --> 00:48:40,959 - I know it's here somewhere. - Check out the bowling ball. 656 00:48:43,213 --> 00:48:45,631 - Hey, how about this bowling ball? - There, I knew it. 657 00:48:59,938 --> 00:49:00,938 Hey, Sue! 658 00:49:04,526 --> 00:49:05,526 What are you doing, love? 659 00:49:06,444 --> 00:49:08,320 Trying to think like a journalist again. 660 00:49:08,988 --> 00:49:10,405 I used to be pretty good at it. 661 00:49:11,491 --> 00:49:12,616 Not that anyone was gonna put 662 00:49:12,700 --> 00:49:15,327 Sue Charleton and Pulitzer Prize in the same sentence, 663 00:49:15,411 --> 00:49:19,832 but, I'm just stumped. 664 00:49:20,208 --> 00:49:22,167 Is it that film studio thing? 665 00:49:23,503 --> 00:49:27,798 I'm sure it's an elaborate front for something. But what? 666 00:49:28,842 --> 00:49:29,842 They're smuggling. 667 00:49:31,010 --> 00:49:33,929 - Drugs or guns. - How do you arrive at that? 668 00:49:34,180 --> 00:49:35,430 That's what it always is. 669 00:49:35,974 --> 00:49:39,309 The big money thing they smuggle into America are drugs. 670 00:49:39,644 --> 00:49:41,728 And the big thing going out, guns. 671 00:49:46,484 --> 00:49:50,112 And where did this insight into major criminal activities come from? 672 00:49:50,989 --> 00:49:52,906 From TV. I'm a quick learner. 673 00:49:53,241 --> 00:49:55,200 Hey, I may look like I just fell off the turnip truck, 674 00:49:55,285 --> 00:49:56,660 but I didn't land on my head. 675 00:49:59,205 --> 00:50:01,915 You know what you need? You need a mole. 676 00:50:02,709 --> 00:50:06,587 - A mole? - Me. I'll get a job at the studio. 677 00:50:07,463 --> 00:50:09,923 Mick, I know you need something to do, but... 678 00:50:10,800 --> 00:50:13,218 I made a lot of contacts at that movie party. 679 00:50:13,344 --> 00:50:14,803 I bet one of them would get me a job there. 680 00:50:15,972 --> 00:50:18,390 Well, what about Mikey? Who's gonna take him to school in the morning? 681 00:50:18,683 --> 00:50:20,976 I'll get him one of those nannies. I'll get a good one. 682 00:50:21,060 --> 00:50:23,604 Don't worry. Leave it to me. This is important. 683 00:50:24,856 --> 00:50:28,483 See, sometimes I think young Mikey thinks I'm a bit of a hillbilly. 684 00:50:29,611 --> 00:50:30,652 Well, I am, actually. 685 00:50:32,322 --> 00:50:33,488 I just wanna show him that 686 00:50:34,073 --> 00:50:36,200 being a hillbilly doesn't necessarily mean you're dumb. 687 00:50:36,701 --> 00:50:39,494 So our first group, stroll up the street, 688 00:50:39,871 --> 00:50:43,415 followed by our three businessmen at a more brisk pace. 689 00:50:43,499 --> 00:50:45,667 And then our two construction workers. 690 00:50:47,629 --> 00:50:50,547 - Diego Gonzales. - Yeah, Mick. Mick Smith. 691 00:50:50,965 --> 00:50:52,007 Nice to meet you, Mick. 692 00:50:52,508 --> 00:50:56,553 Now, we're in Berlin, so please walk like Germans! 693 00:50:57,972 --> 00:50:59,014 How do Germans walk? 694 00:51:00,308 --> 00:51:02,309 I don't know. One foot after the other? 695 00:51:02,393 --> 00:51:03,393 Okay. 696 00:51:03,478 --> 00:51:07,147 So, this is a rehearsal! Background only! 697 00:51:07,857 --> 00:51:10,108 And, action! 698 00:51:17,200 --> 00:51:18,450 What the hell are you doing? 699 00:51:18,868 --> 00:51:20,619 I just wanted my kid to see me in the picture. 700 00:51:20,703 --> 00:51:23,872 Yeah, well, if you start looking at the camera during the take, 701 00:51:24,499 --> 00:51:25,832 they'll take you out of the picture. 702 00:51:26,459 --> 00:51:30,128 - You're new, aren't you? - Yeah, first role. Bit nervous. 703 00:51:30,880 --> 00:51:34,174 Cut! Back to one, please! 704 00:51:34,884 --> 00:51:36,051 Well, look, just relax. 705 00:51:36,135 --> 00:51:37,552 - Watch me, okay? - Yeah. 706 00:51:37,845 --> 00:51:41,765 Forget about the camera. We're two working stiffs on our way to a bar. 707 00:51:42,725 --> 00:51:44,518 - Just pretend it's real life? - Yeah. 708 00:51:49,065 --> 00:51:53,235 Okay, now, people, we will be doing it for real this time, and remember... 709 00:51:53,319 --> 00:51:54,611 Attention, please! 710 00:51:55,363 --> 00:51:57,614 - Quiet, everyone! - Quiet! 711 00:51:58,074 --> 00:51:59,741 - Picture's up! - Picture's up! 712 00:52:00,326 --> 00:52:01,326 Roll! 713 00:52:01,411 --> 00:52:03,203 - Sound speed. - Marker. 714 00:52:05,206 --> 00:52:08,292 - Set. - And, background action. 715 00:52:10,878 --> 00:52:11,920 And action. 716 00:52:15,842 --> 00:52:16,842 Stop that man! 717 00:52:21,597 --> 00:52:23,598 - Cut! Cut! - Man, are you okay? 718 00:52:25,268 --> 00:52:26,268 What the hell happened? 719 00:52:26,352 --> 00:52:29,271 It was my fault. I just saw him running and... 720 00:52:30,481 --> 00:52:33,984 What happened is that he... He tried to catch him as he fell. 721 00:52:34,319 --> 00:52:36,653 We both saw him trip. He went down hard. 722 00:52:37,280 --> 00:52:38,363 Are you sure you're okay? 723 00:52:39,699 --> 00:52:43,702 - Thanks for trying, buddy. - Okay, we'll go again. 724 00:52:44,412 --> 00:52:48,457 Back to one, please! Fast as you can! We're losing the light! 725 00:52:49,250 --> 00:52:51,168 Hey, thanks for covering up for me. 726 00:52:52,045 --> 00:52:55,714 I couldn't help it, you know? Reflex. Sort of like a football flashback. 727 00:52:56,215 --> 00:52:59,426 Football, my ass. That wasn't exactly a legal tackle. 728 00:52:59,761 --> 00:53:02,429 It is at home. It's called a dowel and coat hanger. 729 00:53:03,765 --> 00:53:05,432 Anyway, I owe you one. 730 00:53:06,017 --> 00:53:08,268 No, no, it's okay. I had to keep you here. 731 00:53:08,478 --> 00:53:11,521 You're fun. I want to see what you're gonna do to screw up the next take. 732 00:53:12,398 --> 00:53:13,440 Okay. 733 00:53:35,630 --> 00:53:37,047 What's the problem, Michael? 734 00:53:37,465 --> 00:53:41,718 Miss, do people like rats in America, or are they just pests? 735 00:53:42,678 --> 00:53:43,720 Why do you ask? 736 00:53:44,597 --> 00:53:47,140 'Cause there's a big rat in the bookshelves. 737 00:54:06,786 --> 00:54:07,786 Gross! 738 00:54:11,582 --> 00:54:15,085 - Is it dead? - No, Miss. I only stunned it. 739 00:54:15,378 --> 00:54:18,213 My dad says, "Never kill anything unless you're gonna eat it. " 740 00:54:20,466 --> 00:54:22,926 I think we'll just put it outside, please. 741 00:54:28,307 --> 00:54:30,517 He's my best friend, you know? 742 00:54:31,602 --> 00:54:33,270 You see, the key to survival here 743 00:54:33,729 --> 00:54:36,314 is you gotta keep your face away from the camera. 744 00:54:36,399 --> 00:54:38,525 That way they can use you again and again. 745 00:54:39,193 --> 00:54:40,944 You know, I've been in every mob scene. 746 00:54:41,195 --> 00:54:43,905 - You're a pro. - All right, everyone! Settle down! 747 00:54:44,073 --> 00:54:45,699 - Settling! - Try again. 748 00:54:47,285 --> 00:54:49,286 And background action! 749 00:54:50,788 --> 00:54:51,788 Action. 750 00:54:52,582 --> 00:54:56,460 Watch this! Watch this! Kiki, get me a drink. 751 00:55:03,009 --> 00:55:04,092 - Cut! - That's a cut! 752 00:55:04,177 --> 00:55:05,635 This isn't working. 753 00:55:06,179 --> 00:55:07,929 What's the problem with the monkey? 754 00:55:08,139 --> 00:55:11,933 Sorry. She was fine earlier. Come here, Kiki. Come here. 755 00:55:12,059 --> 00:55:13,143 Come here. 756 00:55:14,562 --> 00:55:17,063 I don't understand. She never does this. 757 00:55:17,607 --> 00:55:19,024 Come here, Kiki! 758 00:55:20,526 --> 00:55:23,778 She's just a bit nervous. What do you want her to do? 759 00:55:24,822 --> 00:55:27,991 - You ever work with animals? - Yeah. Kinda. 760 00:55:28,701 --> 00:55:31,828 She's supposed to go to the table and take a soda to the actor. 761 00:55:39,128 --> 00:55:41,505 - Diet or regular? - Whatever. Diet. 762 00:55:45,551 --> 00:55:48,178 - Want a glass? - She hasn't learned that. 763 00:55:50,598 --> 00:55:52,390 We're running late here. 764 00:55:53,100 --> 00:55:56,811 Can we try one more time? If this doesn't work, we'll drop it. 765 00:55:57,813 --> 00:56:01,274 Okay, back to one. This is the real thing, everybody. 766 00:56:01,526 --> 00:56:02,651 Concentrating. 767 00:56:02,985 --> 00:56:05,904 - Roll! - Picture's up! 768 00:56:05,988 --> 00:56:07,072 - Speed. - Marker. 769 00:56:10,159 --> 00:56:13,078 - And background action! - Action! 770 00:56:13,871 --> 00:56:16,957 Watch this. Watch this! Kiki, get me a drink. 771 00:56:21,629 --> 00:56:22,754 Make it a diet one. 772 00:56:24,757 --> 00:56:27,467 And a glass, too! Thank you, mein liebchen. 773 00:56:27,552 --> 00:56:30,428 Cut! Print! Check the gate. 774 00:56:35,643 --> 00:56:36,643 Book him. 775 00:56:40,273 --> 00:56:41,940 Look I got a problem. 776 00:56:42,191 --> 00:56:43,733 All of my animals are on the jungle set, 777 00:56:43,818 --> 00:56:45,986 and I can't keep coming back and forth with the chimp. 778 00:56:46,571 --> 00:56:48,905 So if you'll fill in for me, I'll double what you're getting paid. 779 00:56:49,156 --> 00:56:50,532 Will I still be on this picture? 780 00:56:51,075 --> 00:56:53,743 Every day. Kiki's an above-the-title player. 781 00:56:54,412 --> 00:56:55,412 You got a deal. 782 00:56:57,582 --> 00:56:58,957 You're looking at the new monkey wrangler. 783 00:56:59,041 --> 00:57:02,669 - Hey, thanks for you help, Diego. - Dude, Mick! 784 00:57:03,296 --> 00:57:06,423 Hey, hey, this is a positive career move. 785 00:57:06,632 --> 00:57:07,924 - You reckon? - Yeah! 786 00:57:08,384 --> 00:57:10,468 I'm telling you, you're gonna go far. 787 00:57:12,430 --> 00:57:13,555 Don't be a stranger now. 788 00:57:17,435 --> 00:57:18,685 Hell of a nice guy. 789 00:57:20,521 --> 00:57:21,605 Can't act for shit, 790 00:57:23,482 --> 00:57:25,817 but he'll probably wind up with his own TV sitcom. 791 00:57:28,321 --> 00:57:29,321 Mikey! 792 00:57:30,531 --> 00:57:31,656 Wait just a minute, dear. 793 00:57:34,410 --> 00:57:36,119 - See ya, Mike. - Bye, Mikey. 794 00:57:37,038 --> 00:57:38,955 I suppose your father's picking you up again. 795 00:57:39,749 --> 00:57:41,333 Nah, he's at work this week. 796 00:57:42,418 --> 00:57:45,003 Bummer. Well, how are you getting home then? 797 00:57:45,129 --> 00:57:47,088 I've got a nanny like all the other kids. 798 00:57:48,215 --> 00:57:49,257 Which one's yours? 799 00:57:50,092 --> 00:57:51,259 Over there. The big one. 800 00:57:54,388 --> 00:57:55,388 Your nanny? 801 00:57:55,556 --> 00:57:58,183 Well, he's really Uncle Jacko from back home. 802 00:57:58,267 --> 00:58:01,895 - And is Uncle Jacko married? - No, but he's looking. 803 00:58:02,563 --> 00:58:05,273 Hi. Dorothy Mathis. I'm Mikey's teacher. 804 00:58:05,399 --> 00:58:07,734 G'day, Dorothy. Call me Jacko. 805 00:58:13,074 --> 00:58:14,157 Bloody marvelous. 806 00:58:16,535 --> 00:58:17,911 Los Angeles, eh? 807 00:58:19,789 --> 00:58:20,830 Funny name. 808 00:58:22,041 --> 00:58:23,083 Los Angeles. 809 00:58:24,168 --> 00:58:26,753 Yeah, it means, "lost angels. " 810 00:58:28,255 --> 00:58:31,049 It's Italian. There it is. 811 00:58:31,425 --> 00:58:33,885 I told Sue I'd take you somewhere really special for dinner. 812 00:58:34,261 --> 00:58:35,762 You're gonna love this place. Trust me. 813 00:58:43,688 --> 00:58:46,773 Now, pick out what you want off the menu here, 814 00:58:46,941 --> 00:58:48,650 and you yell it out into that box. 815 00:58:49,694 --> 00:58:51,820 Two minutes later, you're scarfing it down 816 00:58:51,904 --> 00:58:53,321 without even getting out of the car. 817 00:58:54,657 --> 00:58:56,908 Of course we have these drive-ins back home in the cities, 818 00:58:57,368 --> 00:58:59,160 but this is where it all started. 819 00:58:59,912 --> 00:59:03,790 So you can eat like a pig and no one can see you. 820 00:59:05,418 --> 00:59:07,335 Clever buggers, these Yanks, eh? 821 00:59:07,420 --> 00:59:10,422 Well, this is why L.A. is famous all around the world 822 00:59:10,506 --> 00:59:11,881 for its fine cuisine. 823 00:59:12,633 --> 00:59:14,384 Welcome to Wendy's. Can I take your order, please? 824 00:59:14,468 --> 00:59:17,303 Let me handle this. Good evening, Wendy. 825 00:59:18,222 --> 00:59:22,058 There will be four of us dining in the car this evening. 826 00:59:23,686 --> 00:59:27,021 So we're gonna need four triple burgers with cheese 827 00:59:27,148 --> 00:59:28,648 and four biggie fries. 828 00:59:29,191 --> 00:59:31,443 So that's four classic triples with cheese. 829 00:59:31,527 --> 00:59:32,944 - Wait a minute. - And four biggie fries? 830 00:59:33,362 --> 00:59:36,322 Here comes Stan and Harry. 831 00:59:37,241 --> 00:59:39,409 They'll also be dining with us tonight, 832 00:59:39,869 --> 00:59:43,872 so we need six triple burgers with cheese 833 00:59:44,832 --> 00:59:47,125 and six biggie fries. 834 00:59:47,626 --> 00:59:51,796 Okay. Six classic triples with cheese and six biggie fries? 835 00:59:54,925 --> 00:59:57,510 - You know what I'd really like to do? - What's that? 836 00:59:58,220 --> 01:00:01,181 Go right up on the roof on one of those skyscrapers. 837 01:00:01,974 --> 01:00:04,184 That's easy. Just find one that's open. 838 01:00:14,528 --> 01:00:17,280 Strewth! This is higher than Ayers Rock. 839 01:00:20,201 --> 01:00:23,661 Yeah. Of course, the buildings in New York are a lot higher. 840 01:00:24,330 --> 01:00:25,413 I was there, you know. 841 01:00:26,540 --> 01:00:27,665 Old New York. 842 01:00:29,001 --> 01:00:31,503 Or as we call it, the "Big Apple. " 843 01:00:32,755 --> 01:00:35,131 Big Apple? Why do you call it that? 844 01:00:37,426 --> 01:00:40,011 Well, because it's really big and... 845 01:00:40,304 --> 01:00:42,931 Yeah, but none of those buildings are as dangerous as this. 846 01:00:46,018 --> 01:00:47,018 What do you mean? 847 01:00:47,102 --> 01:00:49,229 Well, they don't have earthquakes in New York. 848 01:00:49,480 --> 01:00:51,272 They have 'em here all the time, right? 849 01:00:52,441 --> 01:00:53,441 Yeah. 850 01:00:55,027 --> 01:00:56,319 We could have one right now. 851 01:00:57,905 --> 01:00:58,905 God! 852 01:00:59,657 --> 01:01:01,157 What do you reckon it'd do to this building? 853 01:01:02,493 --> 01:01:05,662 Hey, I wouldn't wanna be up here if she started shaking, eh? 854 01:01:07,998 --> 01:01:12,085 - I've seen enough. You done? - Yeah. No point in hanging round. 855 01:01:17,883 --> 01:01:18,925 Earthquakes? 856 01:01:19,844 --> 01:01:20,885 No worries. 857 01:01:37,069 --> 01:01:42,073 Mate, I need a drink after all those 1,286 stairs. 858 01:01:42,992 --> 01:01:43,992 No worries, mate. 859 01:02:04,889 --> 01:02:05,889 Didn't work. 860 01:02:06,974 --> 01:02:07,974 Well, you gotta wait. 861 01:02:08,601 --> 01:02:12,103 There's hundreds of cars going through and just us two trying to cross. 862 01:02:14,523 --> 01:02:16,816 Yeah? Now there's 20 of us, eh? 863 01:02:17,568 --> 01:02:19,319 Yeah, but you can't do that. It's illegal. 864 01:02:20,529 --> 01:02:22,030 Well, I don't see any cops. 865 01:02:22,948 --> 01:02:25,366 Yeah, but they have cameras at all these intersections, see? 866 01:02:25,659 --> 01:02:26,784 And if you do anything wrong, 867 01:02:26,869 --> 01:02:29,078 they take your picture and then send you a fine. 868 01:02:31,749 --> 01:02:34,250 Yeah, but I ain't wearing a number plate around my neck, 869 01:02:34,335 --> 01:02:36,753 so how the hell are they gonna know who I am? 870 01:02:40,215 --> 01:02:43,718 Well, when you landed here, you showed 'em your passport, right? 871 01:02:44,094 --> 01:02:45,929 - Yeah. - Got your picture in it, dopey. 872 01:02:47,097 --> 01:02:48,348 Yeah, right. 873 01:02:50,267 --> 01:02:51,601 I wonder how much they fine you. 874 01:02:52,269 --> 01:02:54,145 It all depends on how many times you push the button. 875 01:02:57,942 --> 01:03:02,362 - This looks like us. - Great. Texas bar. We're in. 876 01:03:03,238 --> 01:03:04,364 Now this could be a bit of fun. 877 01:03:04,740 --> 01:03:07,241 These American cowboys love a good barroom brawl. 878 01:03:08,452 --> 01:03:10,244 Howdy, boys. Step on in. 879 01:03:10,579 --> 01:03:11,579 Howdy, ma'am. 880 01:03:15,167 --> 01:03:16,459 - Ma'am. - Howdy, cowboys. 881 01:03:24,677 --> 01:03:26,344 Stone the bloody crows! 882 01:03:28,222 --> 01:03:30,306 That must've been one of those poofter bars. 883 01:03:30,474 --> 01:03:31,474 Yep. 884 01:03:31,558 --> 01:03:34,769 Only I believe the correct term is "gay homosexual. " 885 01:03:35,938 --> 01:03:37,772 That's what they call their shirtlifters over here. 886 01:03:38,273 --> 01:03:41,150 The only woman there was the cowgirl at the door. 887 01:03:48,200 --> 01:03:49,826 Give it up, punk, or I'll blow you away. 888 01:03:51,161 --> 01:03:52,370 Hang on. I can't hear you. 889 01:03:56,208 --> 01:03:58,001 That's better. Now how can I help you? 890 01:03:58,168 --> 01:03:59,627 Smart-ass cowboy, huh? 891 01:03:59,753 --> 01:04:02,088 - Hand me over your money, man! - They ain't cowboys. 892 01:04:02,256 --> 01:04:05,591 - They're fools dressed up! - Yeah, fools got money, too. 893 01:04:06,802 --> 01:04:08,678 Give it up, or I'll bust a cap in your ass! 894 01:04:08,762 --> 01:04:10,054 Yeah, hand it over, bitch! 895 01:04:11,390 --> 01:04:12,390 Bitch? 896 01:04:13,976 --> 01:04:17,437 Son, you have any idea how quick you have to be to catch a tiger snake? 897 01:04:21,191 --> 01:04:23,860 I'm always getting mugged. I must look rich. 898 01:04:24,570 --> 01:04:27,196 Hey, it's one of them soft-topped cars. Cave in. 899 01:04:33,829 --> 01:04:37,331 You know, this must be why they call L.A. the "City on Wheels. " 900 01:04:37,541 --> 01:04:38,541 What do you mean? 901 01:04:38,625 --> 01:04:40,418 Well, they don't even get out of their car to mug you. 902 01:04:42,296 --> 01:04:43,296 Hey! 903 01:04:46,133 --> 01:04:49,218 It's all your fault, homes! You shouldn't have called him a bitch! 904 01:04:55,267 --> 01:04:56,434 Should we call the cops? 905 01:04:57,019 --> 01:05:00,521 No point. Over here, mate, they'd probably end up suing us. 906 01:05:01,774 --> 01:05:03,983 Besides, it's not their fault. 907 01:05:05,235 --> 01:05:06,235 It's the drugs. 908 01:05:07,237 --> 01:05:10,073 I saw all about it on that Geraldo Rivera. 909 01:05:10,949 --> 01:05:12,033 He knows the streets. 910 01:05:13,035 --> 01:05:14,994 Let's just get a cup of coffee and go home. 911 01:05:15,329 --> 01:05:17,789 Don't be too hasty ordering coffee around here. 912 01:05:18,749 --> 01:05:20,917 You might not be too happy with the way they serve 'em. 913 01:05:21,460 --> 01:05:22,502 Trust me. 914 01:05:26,173 --> 01:05:30,301 And this is where a big crocodile almost bit his leg right off. 915 01:05:32,596 --> 01:05:33,596 Neat! 916 01:05:33,680 --> 01:05:36,974 Well, to tell the truth, kids, it wasn't really that big. 917 01:05:38,894 --> 01:05:41,270 No more than 20 feet or so anyway. 918 01:05:41,647 --> 01:05:42,855 That's huge! 919 01:05:54,368 --> 01:05:55,368 Yes, I know. 920 01:05:55,619 --> 01:05:59,080 They just don't appreciate a real artiste. I'd have bit him, too. 921 01:05:59,957 --> 01:06:01,124 I thought you were fabulous. 922 01:06:02,167 --> 01:06:04,127 I don't care what that director said. He's an idiot. 923 01:06:06,046 --> 01:06:07,130 You were really good. 924 01:06:08,465 --> 01:06:10,258 - You said black with one sugar, right? - Yes. 925 01:06:10,342 --> 01:06:12,468 - Thanks, mate. Excellent. - And... 926 01:06:13,554 --> 01:06:14,971 I got us a little treat for our friend here. 927 01:06:15,055 --> 01:06:16,472 Great. That'll hit the spot. 928 01:06:17,516 --> 01:06:18,641 Black and one sugar. 929 01:06:21,937 --> 01:06:23,062 She's a bit grumpy today. 930 01:06:23,981 --> 01:06:25,481 Not happy with the size of her trailer. 931 01:06:26,483 --> 01:06:28,651 She wants a big one like Virgil, but I keep telling her, 932 01:06:28,735 --> 01:06:30,820 "Virgil's a lion. You're only a monkey. " 933 01:06:33,907 --> 01:06:35,825 Sorry. "Chimpanzee. " 934 01:06:37,327 --> 01:06:39,036 Say, have you thought about changing agents? 935 01:06:40,622 --> 01:06:44,125 Diego, you're talking to a chimp. They don't speak English. 936 01:06:44,209 --> 01:06:45,626 Yeah, neither did my first wife. 937 01:06:48,964 --> 01:06:50,173 Keep moving, Dravos. 938 01:07:20,370 --> 01:07:23,289 Don't be stupid! Mind the painting! 939 01:07:33,967 --> 01:07:35,676 Just lean it carefully against the wall for now. 940 01:07:37,596 --> 01:07:38,679 Carefully! 941 01:07:46,480 --> 01:07:48,189 G'day, Phil. What's happening, mate? 942 01:07:49,691 --> 01:07:52,026 Hi, Mick. The usual continuity nightmare. 943 01:07:52,527 --> 01:07:53,569 Right. 944 01:07:54,529 --> 01:07:55,529 What's that mean? 945 01:07:56,031 --> 01:07:57,782 It means I have to make this set 946 01:07:58,533 --> 01:08:01,744 look exactly like it did on location in Yugoslavia. 947 01:08:03,997 --> 01:08:07,208 Yugoslavia. Is that where all these paintings come from? 948 01:08:07,918 --> 01:08:10,920 Yep. They had them done there. Dumb. 949 01:08:11,546 --> 01:08:13,631 Would've been cheaper here and more realistic. 950 01:08:15,550 --> 01:08:18,386 So none of these are valuable. They're just all copies. 951 01:08:19,513 --> 01:08:21,555 Yep, and rather poor ones at that. 952 01:08:22,307 --> 01:08:25,768 And these huge, tacky frames? For God's sakes. 953 01:08:27,479 --> 01:08:30,106 Do they usually cart the sets and the props 954 01:08:30,190 --> 01:08:32,149 from one country to another and back again? 955 01:08:33,527 --> 01:08:35,236 Maybe in a big-budget international movie 956 01:08:35,320 --> 01:08:36,612 like Mission: Impossible lll. 957 01:08:36,989 --> 01:08:39,115 But I haven't seen Tom Cruise hanging around the set, have you? 958 01:08:41,994 --> 01:08:44,036 Tom Cruise. What's he look like? 959 01:08:45,414 --> 01:08:47,540 Like Tom Cruise. 960 01:08:50,752 --> 01:08:52,503 Jeez, Mick, were you born in a cave? 961 01:08:52,671 --> 01:08:54,422 Yeah! How did you know that? 962 01:08:55,757 --> 01:08:56,841 Never mind. 963 01:08:59,052 --> 01:09:01,178 Jim, the Van Goghs are down at the wrong end. 964 01:09:01,888 --> 01:09:04,056 See, here they started with the Gauguins, one above the other. 965 01:09:05,267 --> 01:09:07,893 Let's get this right. We gotta be done in here tonight. 966 01:09:07,978 --> 01:09:09,478 They're shooting in here tomorrow. 967 01:09:24,328 --> 01:09:26,620 You see, you can mix heroin into a plaster, 968 01:09:26,747 --> 01:09:28,205 make it any shape you like. 969 01:09:28,832 --> 01:09:30,458 So when I see this guy go nuts 970 01:09:30,542 --> 01:09:32,293 just 'cause they bumped the lousy painting, 971 01:09:32,836 --> 01:09:34,462 that's when I knew where the drugs were hidden. 972 01:09:34,963 --> 01:09:36,547 Molded into the picture frames. 973 01:09:37,049 --> 01:09:39,759 Pure heroin, or as we call it, "smack. " 974 01:09:40,510 --> 01:09:43,637 Jeez, Mick, you really do think like a detective. 975 01:09:44,181 --> 01:09:46,891 Yeah, mate, it comes sort of natural to me, you know? 976 01:09:47,517 --> 01:09:48,517 Hey, Mick. 977 01:09:50,395 --> 01:09:51,645 That was the police lab. 978 01:09:52,939 --> 01:09:56,108 Sorry. The frames are just plaster. There's no drugs. 979 01:09:56,777 --> 01:09:57,777 Bugger it. 980 01:09:59,946 --> 01:10:01,364 I was sure I cracked the case. 981 01:10:02,532 --> 01:10:05,326 I don't know. Maybe they're not smuggling anything. 982 01:10:05,535 --> 01:10:07,036 No. They're sneaking around with something. 983 01:10:07,496 --> 01:10:08,704 I just haven't found it yet. 984 01:10:10,791 --> 01:10:11,957 Like I read about this fella, 985 01:10:12,376 --> 01:10:15,544 he used to push a wheelbarrow full of cow dung 986 01:10:15,629 --> 01:10:16,962 across the border every day. 987 01:10:17,714 --> 01:10:20,091 "Manure for the garden," he'd say. Went on for months. 988 01:10:20,175 --> 01:10:22,802 And the border guards knew he was smuggling something, 989 01:10:23,178 --> 01:10:25,179 so they'd stop him and they'd rake through that manure 990 01:10:25,263 --> 01:10:26,389 with a fine-tooth comb. 991 01:10:26,556 --> 01:10:27,556 Never found a thing. 992 01:10:28,725 --> 01:10:31,394 Turned out they were right. He was smuggling something, 993 01:10:32,437 --> 01:10:33,437 wheelbarrows. 994 01:10:35,774 --> 01:10:36,857 Right under their noses. 995 01:10:37,609 --> 01:10:41,904 See, it's there, and I'm just not seeing it, yet. And I will. 996 01:10:43,490 --> 01:10:47,451 Nah. I reckon he was right the first time. It's drugs. 997 01:10:47,911 --> 01:10:50,287 They wouldn't go to all that trouble for wheelbarrows. 998 01:11:02,801 --> 01:11:05,428 - Cut! And print. - Cut! 999 01:11:05,512 --> 01:11:08,264 We'll cut when he throws, so that went fine. 1000 01:11:08,849 --> 01:11:10,015 - All right! - Well done, Paul. 1001 01:11:10,100 --> 01:11:13,436 Listen, everyone, we do not burn down the castle now. 1002 01:11:13,520 --> 01:11:16,021 That will be a second-unit shot tomorrow. 1003 01:11:16,606 --> 01:11:19,442 That means everyone goes home early and has tomorrow off. 1004 01:11:20,152 --> 01:11:23,112 - All right! - Okay, see you all Friday! 1005 01:11:23,488 --> 01:11:24,488 First thing! 1006 01:11:37,919 --> 01:11:41,088 And you've actually seen these paintings quite recently? 1007 01:11:41,256 --> 01:11:42,465 Yeah, today. 1008 01:11:43,383 --> 01:11:45,926 Well, then than makes it easy. They're fakes. 1009 01:11:46,011 --> 01:11:47,970 You can tell that from the photographs? 1010 01:11:48,513 --> 01:11:49,847 Well, normally, no. 1011 01:11:49,973 --> 01:11:54,351 But, you see, these Rembrandts, and this, The Olive Field by Van Gogh, 1012 01:11:54,811 --> 01:11:56,645 unfortunately no longer exist. 1013 01:11:57,814 --> 01:11:59,899 During the bombing of Belgrade by NATO, 1014 01:11:59,983 --> 01:12:03,027 the National Art Museum of Serbia took a direct hit, 1015 01:12:03,236 --> 01:12:06,780 burned to the ground along with the originals of these paintings 1016 01:12:06,865 --> 01:12:10,701 and possibly the finest collection of old masters in Eastern Europe. 1017 01:12:11,286 --> 01:12:12,995 It was a tragedy for the art world. 1018 01:12:13,997 --> 01:12:17,291 Ergo, these must be copies, fakes. 1019 01:12:21,004 --> 01:12:24,298 That... Belgrade, is that in Yugoslavia? 1020 01:12:25,926 --> 01:12:26,926 Yeah. 1021 01:12:28,303 --> 01:12:30,054 'Cause that's where these paintings come from. 1022 01:12:32,265 --> 01:12:34,183 What if it wasn't an accidental bombing 1023 01:12:35,101 --> 01:12:36,810 and someone removed the paintings first? 1024 01:12:38,730 --> 01:12:39,772 Spoils of war? 1025 01:12:42,108 --> 01:12:46,153 Maybe I should take a look at these. Could you take me to them? 1026 01:12:47,405 --> 01:12:48,614 That's probably impossible. 1027 01:12:50,534 --> 01:12:54,703 But if I could get one of them and bring it to you and it was real, 1028 01:12:55,038 --> 01:12:56,914 that means the rest are probably real, right? 1029 01:12:57,791 --> 01:12:59,792 You must call me the minute you find one. 1030 01:12:59,876 --> 01:13:01,168 - I have to see them. - No worries. 1031 01:13:01,253 --> 01:13:02,336 - Thank you. - Thank you. 1032 01:13:08,176 --> 01:13:11,011 - Hey, who drew this? - Pablo Picasso. 1033 01:13:12,764 --> 01:13:15,307 I'm a drinking man myself, but I've never been that hammered. 1034 01:13:24,568 --> 01:13:26,777 This'll be a piece of cake. I know this lot backwards. 1035 01:13:29,281 --> 01:13:31,615 - Wait in the car. - Mick? 1036 01:13:33,368 --> 01:13:35,119 I was gonna say, "be careful," 1037 01:13:35,620 --> 01:13:37,705 but I guess that's kind of a dumb thing to say 1038 01:13:37,789 --> 01:13:39,331 to someone who hunts crocodiles. 1039 01:13:39,541 --> 01:13:40,541 No worries. 1040 01:13:53,555 --> 01:13:55,180 Of course the difference is obvious here, 1041 01:13:55,265 --> 01:13:58,976 but on film, it's a perfect match. 1042 01:13:59,060 --> 01:14:00,978 - Isn't it? - All right, we have the paintings. 1043 01:14:01,062 --> 01:14:04,607 Now must we continue with this stupid movie business bullshit? 1044 01:14:04,983 --> 01:14:06,483 You really don't get it, do you? 1045 01:14:06,776 --> 01:14:09,486 God is in the details. 1046 01:14:10,530 --> 01:14:12,406 These came into the country as film props. 1047 01:14:12,490 --> 01:14:15,826 Anyone wants to see them, "Sorry, we burned them. 1048 01:14:15,994 --> 01:14:18,245 "Want proof? Go see the movie. " 1049 01:14:19,581 --> 01:14:23,167 Dead end. Brilliant. 1050 01:14:37,223 --> 01:14:39,016 Carl, we need your help. 1051 01:14:46,441 --> 01:14:49,234 Carl, that painting should be covered. 1052 01:14:49,819 --> 01:14:50,819 I'll be with you in a moment. 1053 01:14:52,364 --> 01:14:55,240 - Then who the hell is that? - Stop him! 1054 01:14:55,742 --> 01:14:57,451 After him! Quickly! 1055 01:14:58,912 --> 01:15:01,330 Shoot low! Don't hit the painting! 1056 01:15:01,456 --> 01:15:04,375 After him! Seal off the lot! 1057 01:15:04,584 --> 01:15:05,668 Quick! Hold this! 1058 01:15:05,752 --> 01:15:06,752 - What? - Thanks. 1059 01:15:47,502 --> 01:15:49,670 He ran in here. Dravos followed him. 1060 01:15:49,838 --> 01:15:53,090 You cover all the exits. Go in and help Dravos flush him out. 1061 01:15:57,011 --> 01:15:59,263 I know, I know. Mick said to wait here. 1062 01:15:59,723 --> 01:16:01,265 It's his bust, right? 1063 01:16:01,891 --> 01:16:03,308 I know. I was just looking. 1064 01:16:04,728 --> 01:16:07,104 How'd you get here anyway? Who's looking after Mikey? 1065 01:16:07,689 --> 01:16:09,982 Miss Mathis, his teacher from school. 1066 01:16:10,442 --> 01:16:11,817 I followed you in her car. 1067 01:16:56,196 --> 01:16:57,362 I'll just keep you on hold. 1068 01:17:13,421 --> 01:17:16,548 "Keep you on hold. " I just come out with them. 1069 01:17:18,885 --> 01:17:21,595 - Who is this man? How does he... - I think he's the monkey guy. 1070 01:17:21,930 --> 01:17:24,890 Mick, the guy that trains the monkey. Same hat. 1071 01:17:25,225 --> 01:17:28,393 How would the monkey guy know about the paintings? 1072 01:17:29,103 --> 01:17:31,730 Is he alone? You better hope he's still alive. 1073 01:17:31,815 --> 01:17:32,856 Get in there. 1074 01:17:35,360 --> 01:17:37,694 We're entering stage four. We'll flush him your way. 1075 01:17:38,112 --> 01:17:39,112 Roger that. 1076 01:19:13,541 --> 01:19:15,375 Shoot low. We need him alive. 1077 01:19:52,330 --> 01:19:53,330 Watch out. 1078 01:19:58,795 --> 01:19:59,795 For the wall. 1079 01:20:10,181 --> 01:20:11,556 He's gone to the jungle set. 1080 01:20:12,100 --> 01:20:14,434 There's only one way in and out of there. I'm on it. 1081 01:20:14,936 --> 01:20:16,436 Just cover the gate till we get there. 1082 01:21:18,166 --> 01:21:21,334 Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! 1083 01:21:24,922 --> 01:21:25,922 High five. 1084 01:21:26,924 --> 01:21:29,634 Stan, copy. Boss said don't go in there alone. 1085 01:21:30,428 --> 01:21:32,929 - Stan? Stan? - Too late, mate. 1086 01:21:33,097 --> 01:21:34,097 Stan! 1087 01:21:55,661 --> 01:21:56,745 Shit. 1088 01:21:58,122 --> 01:21:59,122 Did it... 1089 01:22:01,250 --> 01:22:05,629 It... It missed, I think. 1090 01:22:09,050 --> 01:22:10,175 I hope. 1091 01:22:27,318 --> 01:22:28,401 Hi, Mick. 1092 01:22:32,281 --> 01:22:33,698 I know you're still here. 1093 01:22:36,702 --> 01:22:38,995 Why don't we stop playing this silly game? 1094 01:22:41,332 --> 01:22:46,503 You can come out and join your friends. 1095 01:22:47,797 --> 01:22:50,423 I have no more patience for this! 1096 01:22:51,676 --> 01:22:55,762 Okay, you win. I'm coming out. 1097 01:23:01,185 --> 01:23:03,937 Just don't make any sudden moves. 1098 01:23:04,981 --> 01:23:07,858 You don't have to be so formal. We're all friends. 1099 01:23:07,942 --> 01:23:10,610 You can lower your hands. 1100 01:23:13,865 --> 01:23:15,323 Well, I can't really lower this one. 1101 01:23:15,700 --> 01:23:18,577 - And why is that? - 'Cause if I put this arm down 1102 01:23:18,911 --> 01:23:20,495 and break eye contact, 1103 01:23:20,872 --> 01:23:22,873 he might come down here and tear you apart. 1104 01:23:24,083 --> 01:23:26,209 - Who? - Fella who lives in there. 1105 01:23:32,216 --> 01:23:33,508 Look. Up on the rock. 1106 01:23:38,514 --> 01:23:42,684 Are you nuts? You can't kill a lion with a. 38 pistol. 1107 01:23:43,019 --> 01:23:44,352 You'll just piss him off. 1108 01:23:46,314 --> 01:23:49,149 If you shoot anyone, they better not bleed. 1109 01:23:49,358 --> 01:23:51,568 Yeah, lions go berserk when they smell blood. 1110 01:23:54,572 --> 01:23:57,699 If I was you, I'd back up slowly into that cage. 1111 01:24:07,084 --> 01:24:12,172 Yeah. Surely, that's a tame lion. 1112 01:24:12,506 --> 01:24:15,383 Yeah. You could be right. 1113 01:24:21,682 --> 01:24:23,683 I shoot you. You bleed. 1114 01:24:24,477 --> 01:24:25,894 I take my chances. 1115 01:24:26,479 --> 01:24:28,063 Yeah, but he's not your problem. 1116 01:24:29,023 --> 01:24:30,732 It's his missus I'm worried about. 1117 01:24:36,113 --> 01:24:37,155 I can't handle her. 1118 01:24:38,824 --> 01:24:41,409 She's got PMS, I think. Can see it in her eyes. 1119 01:24:44,580 --> 01:24:47,123 Anyway, you do what you have to do. 1120 01:24:48,042 --> 01:24:51,544 I'm getting in the cage before his mother-in-law comes down. 1121 01:24:53,214 --> 01:24:55,382 No! No! 1122 01:24:57,218 --> 01:25:00,053 - You open the door! Open the door now! - Give me the gun. Give me the gun. 1123 01:25:04,350 --> 01:25:05,767 You held a gun to my wife's head. 1124 01:25:06,560 --> 01:25:07,602 That's unforgivable. 1125 01:25:09,021 --> 01:25:10,146 So I'm gonna help you lose some weight. 1126 01:25:10,231 --> 01:25:12,148 - How? - Virgil's gonna come down here 1127 01:25:12,233 --> 01:25:14,317 and bite a big chunk out of your fat ass. 1128 01:25:16,487 --> 01:25:18,113 Virgil, lunch! 1129 01:25:25,288 --> 01:25:26,288 Sit! 1130 01:25:41,721 --> 01:25:45,682 If you touch me, I will sue you for every cent you've got. 1131 01:25:46,976 --> 01:25:48,226 Well, that sounds fair. 1132 01:25:52,815 --> 01:25:54,607 Hey, that's about 40 bucks. 1133 01:25:56,819 --> 01:25:57,861 It's a fair deal. 1134 01:25:57,987 --> 01:25:58,987 Bargain. 1135 01:26:00,364 --> 01:26:01,406 And how are you, miss? 1136 01:26:02,074 --> 01:26:04,701 - What the hell were you doing in here? - Well, I had to. 1137 01:26:04,785 --> 01:26:05,910 My cell phone went dead, 1138 01:26:05,995 --> 01:26:08,747 and I had to come in here to find a phone to call 911. 1139 01:26:09,123 --> 01:26:11,958 You're clever, Sue. I never would've thought of that. 1140 01:26:12,126 --> 01:26:14,044 Yeah, well, that's because she's a Dundee. 1141 01:26:17,089 --> 01:26:18,089 Or she ought to be. 1142 01:26:20,134 --> 01:26:24,220 Jacko, keep an eye on the goons and block your ears. 1143 01:26:24,430 --> 01:26:27,849 - What? - Block your ears. Private talk. 1144 01:26:28,768 --> 01:26:29,809 No worries, mate. 1145 01:26:34,231 --> 01:26:35,315 I have to tell you this. 1146 01:26:37,068 --> 01:26:39,486 I was just really scared for the first time in my life. 1147 01:26:39,570 --> 01:26:42,947 Well, that's okay. Most people are frightened of lions. 1148 01:26:43,282 --> 01:26:45,533 No, not the lions. They're just hungry. 1149 01:26:46,452 --> 01:26:48,286 It's when I saw that goon with a gun at your head. 1150 01:26:49,538 --> 01:26:51,581 That's when I realized how much I... 1151 01:26:57,588 --> 01:26:58,588 You know... 1152 01:27:00,383 --> 01:27:01,424 Will you marry me? 1153 01:27:04,303 --> 01:27:06,638 Well, you do rush into things, don't you, Mick? 1154 01:27:08,307 --> 01:27:10,392 Are you sure it's not just the romantic setting? 1155 01:27:14,230 --> 01:27:16,731 Local experts say the value of the recovered art 1156 01:27:16,816 --> 01:27:19,943 could run as high as $300 million. 1157 01:27:20,194 --> 01:27:23,363 For the very latest, let's go live to Marta Waller at the scene. Marta? 1158 01:27:23,447 --> 01:27:25,990 Thanks, Hal. Right now the police are taking 1159 01:27:26,075 --> 01:27:28,952 these priceless paintings into protective custody. 1160 01:27:29,328 --> 01:27:32,539 The woman behind me talking to the detective, is Ms. Sue Charleton, 1161 01:27:32,748 --> 01:27:35,500 the Newsday reporter who led detectives 1162 01:27:35,584 --> 01:27:37,669 to the cache of stolen masterpieces. 1163 01:27:37,753 --> 01:27:42,257 Unfortunately, the undercover agent who actually captured the thieves 1164 01:27:42,341 --> 01:27:44,300 declined to be interviewed on camera. 1165 01:27:44,593 --> 01:27:45,969 However, earlier tonight, 1166 01:27:46,053 --> 01:27:49,722 he did tell me he is, in fact, a known expert in the art world. 1167 01:27:49,974 --> 01:27:52,684 Isn't that the guy who had the skunk on the freeway? 1168 01:27:52,768 --> 01:27:56,354 - Hey, Hal! - We'll have more as the story unfolds. 1169 01:27:56,439 --> 01:27:58,106 Right now, let's go to Malibu 1170 01:27:58,190 --> 01:28:01,526 where last night's downpour of almost a quarter inch of rain 1171 01:28:01,902 --> 01:28:05,280 resulted in disastrous flooding and massive mud slides 1172 01:28:05,364 --> 01:28:07,073 along the Pacific Coast Highway. 1173 01:28:11,120 --> 01:28:15,206 Sue, do you accept this larrikin as your wedded husband? 1174 01:28:16,459 --> 01:28:17,459 I do. 1175 01:28:17,585 --> 01:28:21,254 Mick, do you accept this lovely lady as your wedded wife? 1176 01:28:24,758 --> 01:28:25,758 No worries. 1177 01:28:27,386 --> 01:28:28,386 Fair enough. 1178 01:28:29,263 --> 01:28:32,849 I now pronounce you husband and wife. 1179 01:28:39,732 --> 01:28:41,983 - Good on you, Mick. - All right! 1180 01:28:53,913 --> 01:28:56,456 It's official now, mate. You're Mick Dundee ll. 1181 01:28:56,874 --> 01:28:59,834 - Cool. - Now I guess we'll wait and see 1182 01:29:00,252 --> 01:29:03,671 whether you turn out to be another Crocodile Dundee 1183 01:29:04,006 --> 01:29:06,883 or Michael Dundee, newspaper tycoon. 1184 01:29:07,843 --> 01:29:09,302 That's a no-brainer, Dad. 1185 01:29:09,470 --> 01:29:10,762 I'm gonna be Crocodile Dundee, 1186 01:29:11,972 --> 01:29:15,058 hunter and rich owner of a big newspaper. 1187 01:29:15,267 --> 01:29:16,809 Yeah, I didn't raise a dumbbell. 1188 01:29:18,354 --> 01:29:19,854 Put this on for the photos. 1189 01:29:21,357 --> 01:29:22,357 What for? 1190 01:29:22,441 --> 01:29:24,359 'Cause you look like a dork in that suit. 1191 01:29:24,693 --> 01:29:25,693 No, I don't. 1192 01:29:25,945 --> 01:29:27,862 You should look like Crocodile Dundee. 1193 01:29:35,329 --> 01:29:37,830 No, I think my crocodile hunting days are over. 1194 01:29:39,583 --> 01:29:44,420 Yeah, from here on in, it's Mick Dundee, private eye. 1195 01:29:47,716 --> 01:29:49,467 Nah. I'm kidding. 94195

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