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1
00:00:19,419 --> 00:00:21,219
(SNICKERING)
2
00:00:27,661 --> 00:00:29,731
Well, hey there, y'all.
3
00:00:29,798 --> 00:00:33,198
This is Down Home
Brick Crashman in the beautiful bluegrass hills of Kentucky.
4
00:00:33,267 --> 00:00:37,067
Where the racers
are receiving a fine toast of Southern hospitality.
5
00:00:37,137 --> 00:00:37,967
(GULPING)
6
00:00:38,039 --> 00:00:40,609
(SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY)
7
00:00:40,674 --> 00:00:43,414
Well said, Paw.
8
00:00:43,478 --> 00:00:45,778
So, let's check out
the pre-race action.
9
00:00:45,846 --> 00:00:48,516
Well, thank you.
Thank you very much.
10
00:00:48,582 --> 00:00:50,722
-(MACHINE WHIRRING)
-(CLANGING)
11
00:00:50,784 --> 00:00:53,094
(ALL YAWNING)
12
00:00:53,153 --> 00:00:55,293
(CLANGING)
13
00:00:55,355 --> 00:00:57,325
(MUMBLING)
14
00:00:57,392 --> 00:00:59,832
Dicky, old buddy,
do you think you might be ready soon?
15
00:00:59,894 --> 00:01:01,964
I'll be ready, old buddy,
16
00:01:02,029 --> 00:01:03,929
when I'm ready
to be ready
17
00:01:03,998 --> 00:01:05,968
and not a moment sooner.
18
00:01:06,034 --> 00:01:08,474
Why get so worked up
about a race you're just going to lose anyway.
19
00:01:08,535 --> 00:01:11,605
What? Me lose a race?
20
00:01:11,672 --> 00:01:13,572
Do you know
who you're talking to?
21
00:01:13,640 --> 00:01:15,340
-MAN: Yes.
-(GROANS)
22
00:01:15,410 --> 00:01:18,750
A pitifully pompous,
preening purple popinjay,
23
00:01:18,812 --> 00:01:20,812
with a particularly
poor propensity
24
00:01:20,881 --> 00:01:22,851
to pronounce poly syllables
25
00:01:22,918 --> 00:01:25,788
and a pathetic predilection
to produce prolonged, pointless pandemonium.
26
00:01:25,853 --> 00:01:27,423
Yes, that is
a fairly accurate...
27
00:01:27,487 --> 00:01:30,387
What? How dare you say it.
28
00:01:30,457 --> 00:01:35,127
(DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING)
29
00:01:35,196 --> 00:01:37,766
(LAUGHS) Oh, it's you, uh...
30
00:01:37,831 --> 00:01:40,001
Um, hello, Pop-Pop.
31
00:01:40,067 --> 00:01:43,737
Dastardly, stand up straight
you disappointing descendant.
32
00:01:43,804 --> 00:01:46,114
-Oh, hello, grandfather.
-Don't touch me.
33
00:01:46,173 --> 00:01:49,483
It's simply
sensationalagacious to see your sartorial...
34
00:01:49,543 --> 00:01:51,213
(SNORING)
35
00:01:51,279 --> 00:01:53,909
Dastardly,
is this your grandfather?
36
00:01:53,981 --> 00:01:56,051
Yes, he used to race himself
back in the day.
37
00:01:56,117 --> 00:01:58,687
And spent time in the
aerial reconnaissance service,
38
00:01:58,752 --> 00:02:00,792
was shipped home
after some trouble
39
00:02:00,854 --> 00:02:02,894
with a carrier pigeon I believe.
40
00:02:02,957 --> 00:02:06,087
(GRUNTS) Uh, pigeons, pigeons!
41
00:02:06,159 --> 00:02:07,259
Pop, sir...
42
00:02:07,328 --> 00:02:09,298
There you are pigeon.
Oh, sorry.
43
00:02:09,363 --> 00:02:11,833
You're just
a talking flamingo. That's fine.
44
00:02:11,899 --> 00:02:14,939
A-a flamingo? Humph!
45
00:02:15,002 --> 00:02:17,142
Pop-Pop, what are you
doing here exactly?
46
00:02:17,204 --> 00:02:20,044
I am here, grandson,
to bring you back home
47
00:02:20,107 --> 00:02:21,937
because you are
such a complete,
48
00:02:22,009 --> 00:02:24,349
total, utterly, sad,
embarrassing failure
49
00:02:24,412 --> 00:02:26,952
in every way possible.
Stand up straight.
50
00:02:27,014 --> 00:02:30,484
Grandson,
have you ever won a race?
51
00:02:30,550 --> 00:02:32,090
-I nearly...
-Ever?
52
00:02:32,153 --> 00:02:34,353
-There have been
extenuating... -One?
53
00:02:34,421 --> 00:02:36,561
-But...
-Pack your stuff.
54
00:02:36,624 --> 00:02:40,194
You are staying in the basement
next to your grandmothers haunted doll collection.
55
00:02:40,260 --> 00:02:41,930
Not the dolls!
56
00:02:41,996 --> 00:02:43,896
They move when you're not looking.
57
00:02:43,964 --> 00:02:45,334
(WHIMPERING)
58
00:02:45,399 --> 00:02:47,469
But what if Dastardly
won today's race?
59
00:02:47,534 --> 00:02:49,704
(ALL LAUGHING)
60
00:02:49,770 --> 00:02:51,140
Oh, she's serious.
61
00:02:51,205 --> 00:02:53,535
Pop-Pop, if Dastardly
did win today
62
00:02:53,607 --> 00:02:55,307
-would you let him stay?
-Hmm...
63
00:02:55,376 --> 00:02:57,736
Well, it goes against
my better judgment,
64
00:02:57,811 --> 00:03:00,311
but okay, deal.
65
00:03:00,381 --> 00:03:01,951
Penny, what was
the point of that?
66
00:03:02,016 --> 00:03:03,576
Dicky never wins these races.
67
00:03:03,651 --> 00:03:05,221
It's so predictable,
I'm amazed anyone watches.
68
00:03:05,286 --> 00:03:07,146
It's basic cable,
no one does.
69
00:03:07,221 --> 00:03:10,361
He'll win today
because we are going to let him.
70
00:03:10,423 --> 00:03:12,133
-We are?
-Yes!
71
00:03:12,194 --> 00:03:15,134
Because if we don't
Dastardly will have to stop racing with us.
72
00:03:15,196 --> 00:03:17,966
And that's bad
how exactly?
73
00:03:18,032 --> 00:03:21,972
Bella, we might never
see him again.
74
00:03:22,036 --> 00:03:23,866
Still not really see
a downside here.
75
00:03:23,939 --> 00:03:26,469
He's our friend
and it is the nice thing to do.
76
00:03:26,540 --> 00:03:28,440
So, we're gonna do it.
77
00:03:28,508 --> 00:03:32,978
(ENGINE CRANKING)
78
00:03:33,047 --> 00:03:35,817
(SCREAMS) Pigeon, pigeon!
79
00:03:35,883 --> 00:03:37,823
(MUTTERING)
80
00:03:37,885 --> 00:03:40,015
Ah, run, run for you lives.
81
00:03:40,087 --> 00:03:42,157
That's Muttley,
my dog.
82
00:03:42,223 --> 00:03:43,493
Don't be ridiculous.
83
00:03:43,557 --> 00:03:44,827
Dogs don't wear helmets.
84
00:03:44,892 --> 00:03:46,762
Pigeons wear helmets.
85
00:03:46,827 --> 00:03:48,657
And have huge laser wings,
86
00:03:48,730 --> 00:03:52,270
with photon beaks and eyes that burn into your soul.
87
00:03:52,332 --> 00:03:55,072
(CROWS CAWING)
88
00:03:55,136 --> 00:03:56,466
-(GROWLING)
-(WHIMPERING)
89
00:03:56,537 --> 00:03:59,107
He's really got a thing
about pigeons.
90
00:03:59,173 --> 00:04:01,383
Racers, start your engines.
91
00:04:01,442 --> 00:04:03,412
-(ENGINES CRANKING)
-(EXPLOSION)
92
00:04:03,477 --> 00:04:05,377
ALL: Oh!
93
00:04:05,445 --> 00:04:07,345
(SCREECHING)
94
00:04:07,415 --> 00:04:10,375
-(LAUGHING SHEEPISHLY)
-(SIGHS)
95
00:04:10,450 --> 00:04:11,750
(CRASHING)
96
00:04:11,819 --> 00:04:13,889
(MUMBLING)
97
00:04:13,954 --> 00:04:15,564
Language, Paw.
98
00:04:15,623 --> 00:04:17,963
I have another engine,
won't be a tick.
99
00:04:18,025 --> 00:04:20,255
-(GROANING)
-Oh, goodness.
100
00:04:20,328 --> 00:04:22,498
I seem to be having
engine trouble.
101
00:04:22,562 --> 00:04:23,762
(ENGINE REVVING)
102
00:04:23,831 --> 00:04:25,571
Ahem!
103
00:04:25,633 --> 00:04:28,803
Then I guess I'm also having
trouble with my engine as well.
104
00:04:28,869 --> 00:04:30,369
(CLANGING)
105
00:04:35,509 --> 00:04:39,209
(CLANGING CONTINUES)
106
00:04:39,280 --> 00:04:41,920
CAR:Ow-ow, what are you doing?
107
00:04:41,982 --> 00:04:43,922
It's the nice thing to do.
108
00:04:43,984 --> 00:04:45,224
CAR:You've gone insane.
109
00:04:45,286 --> 00:04:47,086
Someone call the DMV.
110
00:04:47,154 --> 00:04:50,594
Ready. Get set. Go!
111
00:04:50,657 --> 00:04:53,257
(ENGINE SPUTTERING)
112
00:04:53,326 --> 00:04:54,396
(GROANS)
113
00:04:54,462 --> 00:04:57,632
You have got to be
kidding me.
114
00:04:57,698 --> 00:05:01,298
(DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING)
115
00:05:04,571 --> 00:05:05,971
(BELL DINGING)
116
00:05:06,040 --> 00:05:08,040
I didn't even know
my car went this slow.
117
00:05:08,108 --> 00:05:09,738
I have
the parking brake on.
118
00:05:09,811 --> 00:05:12,311
Remember, we're doing this for Dastardly.
119
00:05:12,379 --> 00:05:13,749
Ooh-wompt-te-do.
120
00:05:13,815 --> 00:05:15,975
I can see
why you don't wanna give this up.
121
00:05:16,050 --> 00:05:17,280
Really thrilling.
122
00:05:17,351 --> 00:05:19,221
If we drove this slow
back in my day
123
00:05:19,286 --> 00:05:23,416
you'll be speaking
pigeon now.
124
00:05:23,491 --> 00:05:25,991
You do get that you're
in the lead, right?
125
00:05:26,060 --> 00:05:28,230
If you just kept going.
126
00:05:28,295 --> 00:05:30,565
Grandfather, please.
Leave the racing to me.
127
00:05:30,631 --> 00:05:33,231
But you're in the lead.
Why stop to cheat?
128
00:05:33,300 --> 00:05:36,200
Here they come. Hide!
129
00:05:36,270 --> 00:05:38,910
Oh, look.
A detour sign.
130
00:05:38,972 --> 00:05:41,082
That gag is older than
Tiny's socks.
131
00:05:41,141 --> 00:05:43,411
Sigh, oh, look.
An unexpected detour sign
132
00:05:43,477 --> 00:05:45,907
on a well established course
of a professional racing event.
133
00:05:45,979 --> 00:05:47,449
Be nice.
134
00:05:47,515 --> 00:05:49,775
Gosh, I guess we
better all follow it.
135
00:05:49,850 --> 00:05:54,550
(ENGINE REVVING)
136
00:05:54,621 --> 00:05:56,191
(WHIRRING)
137
00:05:56,257 --> 00:05:58,527
Ha-ha. They fell for it.
138
00:05:58,592 --> 00:06:01,832
Now, my victory is mine.
139
00:06:01,895 --> 00:06:03,025
Drat.
140
00:06:03,097 --> 00:06:04,667
(TIRES SCREECHING)
141
00:06:04,732 --> 00:06:07,302
-We don't have too.
-It's the nice thing to do.
142
00:06:07,368 --> 00:06:09,968
-(SCREECHING)
-(ALL SCREAMING)
143
00:06:10,037 --> 00:06:12,467
CAR:What is wrong with you people.
144
00:06:12,539 --> 00:06:13,909
(CRASHING)
145
00:06:13,975 --> 00:06:16,975
Richard, just get
in the stinking car and drive.
146
00:06:17,044 --> 00:06:19,684
I can see the finish line
from here.
147
00:06:19,746 --> 00:06:21,176
Behold, Fodder,
148
00:06:21,248 --> 00:06:23,278
in my hand I hold
a remarkable device
149
00:06:23,350 --> 00:06:26,050
I have gained through methods
too insidious to relate to now
150
00:06:26,120 --> 00:06:28,590
that will assure me victory!
151
00:06:28,656 --> 00:06:31,586
I'll probably
regret this question, but what does it do?
152
00:06:31,658 --> 00:06:34,558
-It makes holes.
-(THUDS)
153
00:06:34,629 --> 00:06:37,569
-(WHIRRING)
-What good is that?
154
00:06:37,632 --> 00:06:40,032
I shall make a hole
in front of the other racers
155
00:06:40,100 --> 00:06:42,240
and they shall fall in
156
00:06:42,303 --> 00:06:44,373
allowing me to win the race.
157
00:06:44,438 --> 00:06:46,908
Look, we could just
walk to the finish line.
158
00:06:46,974 --> 00:06:50,184
You never understood me.
159
00:06:50,244 --> 00:06:52,484
Drat!
(GROANS)
160
00:06:52,546 --> 00:06:53,646
Drat!
(GROANS)
161
00:06:53,714 --> 00:06:55,024
Drat!
(GROANS)
162
00:06:55,082 --> 00:06:56,082
Drat!
(GROANS)
163
00:06:56,150 --> 00:06:57,920
Drat!
(GROANS)
164
00:06:57,985 --> 00:07:00,385
Drat!
165
00:07:00,453 --> 00:07:01,563
Do we gotta?
166
00:07:01,621 --> 00:07:02,561
(SIGHS)
167
00:07:02,623 --> 00:07:04,623
It's the nice thing
to do.
168
00:07:04,691 --> 00:07:06,461
(ALL SCREAM)
169
00:07:06,527 --> 00:07:08,127
What is wrong
with those people?
170
00:07:08,195 --> 00:07:09,695
I know, right?
171
00:07:09,763 --> 00:07:11,273
(SNICKERING)
172
00:07:11,332 --> 00:07:13,502
(CONTINUE SCREAMING)
173
00:07:13,568 --> 00:07:15,198
What are you
doing here?
174
00:07:15,269 --> 00:07:16,639
-Oof!
-We fell... (GRUNTS)
175
00:07:16,704 --> 00:07:18,744
...into your clever...
Ohh! Trap.
176
00:07:18,805 --> 00:07:21,835
(ALL CONTINUE SCREAMING)
177
00:07:21,910 --> 00:07:24,610
Well, at least there's
no where left to fall.
178
00:07:24,678 --> 00:07:29,148
(ALL SCREAMING)
179
00:07:29,216 --> 00:07:30,576
(ALL GRUNT)
180
00:07:30,650 --> 00:07:31,820
ALL: Ooh!
181
00:07:31,885 --> 00:07:32,885
(GROANS)
182
00:07:32,953 --> 00:07:36,123
Pigeons!
183
00:07:36,190 --> 00:07:38,890
Ha-ha, there's
the finish line.
184
00:07:38,959 --> 00:07:40,659
So it is.
185
00:07:40,728 --> 00:07:42,358
And therefore,
the perfect time for me to take a shortcut
186
00:07:42,430 --> 00:07:44,560
through this handy
haunted goldmine.
187
00:07:44,631 --> 00:07:45,831
Perfect time?
188
00:07:45,900 --> 00:07:48,270
Just finish the race,
for pigeon's sake!
189
00:07:48,335 --> 00:07:51,265
-Trust me.
-(TIRES SCFREECHING)
190
00:07:51,338 --> 00:07:53,108
Maybe it's just not possible
to let him win.
191
00:07:53,173 --> 00:07:54,813
I'm starting to
agree with you.
192
00:07:54,875 --> 00:07:56,675
(ENGINES REVVING)
193
00:07:56,744 --> 00:07:59,254
BELLA: Well, at least
it's dark and terrifying.
194
00:07:59,313 --> 00:08:01,153
I can barely see anything.
195
00:08:01,216 --> 00:08:04,116
Scanners reveal a heat source
in the lowest chamber of the mine.
196
00:08:04,184 --> 00:08:07,124
PENELOPE:
That must be Dastardly.
197
00:08:07,187 --> 00:08:09,857
What's that?
198
00:08:09,923 --> 00:08:11,233
Uh, this is not good.
199
00:08:11,292 --> 00:08:13,092
(LAUGHS MALICIOUSLY)
200
00:08:13,160 --> 00:08:14,430
Dastardly, what are
you doing?
201
00:08:14,495 --> 00:08:16,155
Winning, that's what.
202
00:08:16,230 --> 00:08:17,970
I know you've been
trying to let me win,
203
00:08:18,032 --> 00:08:21,442
so I knew you'd
follow me down this horrifying hole
204
00:08:21,502 --> 00:08:24,342
where I would trigger
my terrific trap.
205
00:08:24,405 --> 00:08:27,105
I will now collapse
the tunnel you came in
206
00:08:27,174 --> 00:08:29,484
and by the time
you dig out,
207
00:08:29,543 --> 00:08:32,583
I will have won
the race!
208
00:08:32,647 --> 00:08:35,147
You used our kindness
and goodwill against us?
209
00:08:35,215 --> 00:08:36,845
I did.
210
00:08:36,918 --> 00:08:40,618
Dastardly, that is
the most dastardly thing I have ever heard of.
211
00:08:40,687 --> 00:08:41,917
Why, thank you.
212
00:08:41,989 --> 00:08:45,129
Muttley, launch
the missile!
213
00:08:45,192 --> 00:08:46,662
(BAT SQUEAKING)
214
00:08:46,726 --> 00:08:49,026
Aah! Pigeons. Pigeons!
215
00:08:49,096 --> 00:08:50,726
(FIRES)
216
00:08:50,797 --> 00:08:52,297
(CRASHES)
217
00:08:52,366 --> 00:08:54,466
Drat.
Pop-Pop, how could you?
218
00:08:54,534 --> 00:08:55,344
(SNORING)
219
00:08:55,402 --> 00:08:56,972
♪ Stop the pigeon ♪
220
00:08:57,037 --> 00:08:58,107
DASTARDLY:
Double drat!
221
00:08:58,172 --> 00:09:00,042
Muttley, this is
all your fault!
222
00:09:00,107 --> 00:09:03,107
-(TIRES SCREECH)
-(MUTTLEY MUTTERING)
223
00:09:03,177 --> 00:09:04,647
PENELOPE: We're trapped!
224
00:09:04,712 --> 00:09:06,182
PETER: Dicky, you've really
done it this time.
225
00:09:06,246 --> 00:09:07,716
BELLA: We'll never
get out of here.
226
00:09:07,782 --> 00:09:10,822
I.Q.: The avalanche
is gaining on us!
227
00:09:10,884 --> 00:09:13,324
(ALL SCREAM)
228
00:09:13,387 --> 00:09:14,557
Look, daylight!
229
00:09:14,622 --> 00:09:17,162
Usually blah,
but in this case, yippee!
230
00:09:17,224 --> 00:09:20,094
(all scream)
231
00:09:20,160 --> 00:09:23,060
And the ...
Bella and Tiny Gruesome
232
00:09:23,130 --> 00:09:25,370
wins the Kentucky
Car Crash-'Em-Up!
233
00:09:25,432 --> 00:09:26,672
How you feel, boys?
234
00:09:26,733 --> 00:09:28,703
Tiny sad.
235
00:09:28,768 --> 00:09:30,598
(BRICK EXCLAIMS)
236
00:09:30,671 --> 00:09:33,541
Mr. Dastardly, you're not
really leaving us, are you?
237
00:09:33,607 --> 00:09:37,037
Yes, I'm afraid
my grandfather is going to insist.
238
00:09:37,110 --> 00:09:38,710
But, Dicky,
you're part of the team.
239
00:09:38,779 --> 00:09:41,649
It wouldn't beWacky Races
without you, old buddy.
240
00:09:41,715 --> 00:09:43,675
(CRYING)
241
00:09:43,750 --> 00:09:46,250
Purple man, no go.
242
00:09:46,320 --> 00:09:48,390
I don't feel my flanges.
243
00:09:48,455 --> 00:09:50,515
How's it flying,
youngsters?
244
00:09:50,591 --> 00:09:54,131
(CRYING) We were
just saying goodbye.
245
00:09:54,194 --> 00:09:55,964
(BOTH SOBBING)
246
00:09:56,029 --> 00:09:57,669
Why, you are
going somewhere?
247
00:09:57,732 --> 00:09:59,472
We thought Dicky was
leaving with you.
248
00:09:59,533 --> 00:10:01,743
Oh, that whole thing.
No.
249
00:10:01,803 --> 00:10:04,743
Really?
But what changed your mind?
250
00:10:04,806 --> 00:10:07,476
Richard, when I saw
the love and affection
251
00:10:07,541 --> 00:10:09,181
your friends had for you,
252
00:10:09,243 --> 00:10:10,913
and that you were willing
253
00:10:10,979 --> 00:10:13,449
to use and betray
that love for your own selfish ends,
254
00:10:13,514 --> 00:10:15,754
without even
a second thought,
255
00:10:15,817 --> 00:10:18,847
well, I have never
been more proud.
256
00:10:18,920 --> 00:10:21,090
That's when I knew
you were a winner
257
00:10:21,155 --> 00:10:23,185
and you should
keep racing.
258
00:10:23,257 --> 00:10:25,357
Thanks, Pop-Pop.
259
00:10:25,426 --> 00:10:26,956
I learned it all
from you.
260
00:10:27,027 --> 00:10:28,327
Don't touch me.
261
00:10:28,395 --> 00:10:30,495
Because you were always
terrible to me.
262
00:10:30,564 --> 00:10:33,004
Aw, you're
a rotten grandson.
263
00:10:33,066 --> 00:10:34,836
I know.
264
00:10:34,902 --> 00:10:37,902
It's just so hard
to feel good about their relationship.
265
00:10:37,971 --> 00:10:38,971
Blah.
266
00:10:39,039 --> 00:10:40,569
See you later, kiddo.
267
00:10:40,641 --> 00:10:42,341
-Keep your eye out
for pigeons. -(ENGINE STARTS)
268
00:10:42,409 --> 00:10:43,579
Hey, did he...
269
00:10:43,644 --> 00:10:45,684
Yes, he just stole my car.
270
00:10:45,746 --> 00:10:48,246
-(BLOWS NOSE)
-(SNICKERING)
271
00:10:48,315 --> 00:10:51,115
(LAUGHING MANICALLY)
272
00:10:51,185 --> 00:10:55,985
(EXCLAIMING)
273
00:10:56,056 --> 00:10:58,456
Aah! The pigeons!
Pigeons!
274
00:10:58,506 --> 00:11:03,056
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