All language subtitles for Life With Derek s03e24 Allergy Season.eng

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Original subtitles

[twinkling music]

[twinkling music]

- Who wants oatmeal surprise?

- Sir Monks-a-lot does.

- That's one brave monkey.

- There you go. - Thank you, Daddy! - What's the word, Ed?

- Your car is waxed and I burned that mix CD

as per your instructions.

- Atta boy. - You're ready to roll.

- Roll where? - Oh, you know. Big date tomorrow night.

- Well, your big date better not involve the car because

I already told you that I need it.

- So? I ignore stuff you say all the time.

- Derek, the deal is that I pay half the insurance,

so I get the car one-third of the time.

- Yeah, but possession is nine-tenths of the law,

which is more than one-third... I think.

- Mm hm. - George, are you listening to this?!

- Oh, yeah. But you know what?

You 2 are gonna have to learn to work things out for yourselves

'Cuz I'm just sick of the bickering.

- So that's it? This is so unfair!

- Yeah, so is the fact that you're using my cereal bowl,

but you don't see me throwing a hissy.

But, give it back anyway. - Ah, forget it!

Derek, let go!

- Paws off!

[Rattling] ♪♪♪

- Hey!

♪♪♪

You think this is funny?

- Little bit. - It's all over.

- You want some milk with your porridge?

- Casey and Derek, you're both grounded!

- ♪♪ Used to be my mother and my sister and me ♪

♪ A happy little family and all right with me ♪

♪ But Mom got married, that's when everything changed ♪

♪ Some things were lost and others were gained ♪

♪ A new school... A new house... ♪

♪ So many changes it makes my head spin ♪

♪ Now I've got a brother who gets under my skin ♪

♪ This is life with Derek ♪

♪ This is life with Derek ♪

♪ This is life with Lizzie, Edwin, George and Nora ♪

♪ Marti and Casey ♪

♪ Living life with Derek ♪

♪ Living life with Derek ♪♪

- When you're part of a big family, you have to co-operate.

But how can I cooperate with Derek?

He doesn't know the meaning of the word.

He's an operator not a cooperator.

- Dad you're not seriously grounding us.

- Oh, yeah, yeah, I seriously am.

Because sometimes little kids? They need time outs.

- We're not little kids! At least I'm not.

- Uh, Casey, weren't you playing tug of war over a bowl?

- But Derek started it! - Okay, look, we can sit around

all day and blame Casey for being a big baby

and starting this but... let's move on.

What's the sentence?

- You're both grounded for the weekend. - Oh, no! I have a date!

- And being grounded is for difficult kids.

Do you really want people to think I come from a bad home?

- Ha-ha-ha! It doesn't bother me!

And the first lesson in cooperation

is how to clean up the kitchen together.

- Thanks a lot, Casey.

- Uh, me? Thanks to you I am missing

the biggest party of the year!

- James Burton's? - Yeah, how'd you know?

- 'Cuz that's where I was gonna take Ellen.

- You mean we could've gone together the whole time?

I can't believe this! I am never talking to you again.

- Now, is that a threat

or a promise?

- [Edwin]: Behold. The Super Sleuth 3000

patented detective kit.

- Edwin can we behold later?

We gotta go to school.

- A detective kit? - Oh, yeah!

It's got a u.v. light, spectrometer

and fingerprinting capabilities!

It's cool, huh? - Oh yeah.

You could use it to solve the mystery of...

Your geekdom. ♪♪♪

- Did, did he just insult the Super Sleuth?

- C'mon, Sherlock.

- Stupid books, get in there!

♪♪♪

- Rough day? - Understatement of the year.

- Well, cheer up! 'Cuz tomorrow...

We are going to the biggest party of the year.

Everyone who's anyone is gonna be there.

- And I'll still be no one.

- No. We're anyones! And everyones.

And not to mention someones!

- Em, I'm grounded.

- For what? Staying up all night studying?

- No, for fighting with Derek.

- Are you serious? Ah, come on, Case!

We have to go! You've got to let the world know that you're single again.

And it's James Burton's party!

We have to go! He's the cutest guy in Grade 12.

- I know... But we were only invited by the cousin of that...

guy with the back hair in chemistry.

James Burton doesn't even know we exist.

- Hey, Casey. What's up, Emily? - [Emily]: Hey, James.

- Hey, Burton. - I heard you 2 are hitting my party on Friday.

Well, listen, I'm stoked you're coming. It's gonna be sick.

- He knows our names. - Sort of!

- You sure this is gonna work?

- One fingerprint and we'll know

who left the TV on last night.

Aha!

I've got one.

Now all we need to do is run it against the suspects

and nab our crook.

- Why're you powdering the remote?

- Trying to find out who left the TV on last night.

- I did. Fell asleep watching hockey.

- Dad!

Don't confess before we've collected the evidence!

- Yeah, thanks a lot George!

♪♪♪

- Rapunzel's stepfather wanted to lock her in the tower

but her kind, wonderful

and beautiful fairy Godmother helped her escape.

The end.

- Can I go now?

Or did you want Nora to hear you read me another story?

- No, no, you can go.

- Laying on the guilt to help reduce your sentence?

- It's the sickest party of the year!

- I'm sorry, Casey, but you and Derek did the crime,

now you've gotta do the time.

- Don't worry, Ellen. I'll be there.

Yeah, I'll pick you up at, uh, 7, we'll go to James'.

- You are so busted.

- I'm gonna have to call you back. There's a rat in my room.

Huh!

Look, I don't know what you heard

- You're going to James' party. - Oh. That. Right.

Uh... come on!

My dad grounded us over spilt oatmeal

that happened to spill on his head.

- So he overreacted. That doesn't make it okay

to sneak out. - No!

It makes it okay for me

to sneak out. For a goody-goody like you,

well it's never okay. - What is that supposed to mean?

- Oh, it means you're as, ah...

edgy as a teddy bear.

♪♪♪

- I'm coming with you.

- Ahh... I never invited you.

And there is no way a goody-goody like you could ever

pull off something like this.

- Pull what off? Come on! What is your plan?

- Uh...

My plan is to sneak out.

- That's your plan? - You got a better plan?

- No! But I'm great at planning!

I love to plan. Oh, in fact, I've already got a plan!

- I've decided...

Since you're not going to the party, I won't either.

- Em, you don't have to do that.

- Hey, what are friends for?

Besides, I'm a little scared to go by myself.

- Oh, then... how 'bout I meet you there?

- You're sneaking out? - Yeah! And I need your help.

- You got it, but where did you get this whole rebellious streak?

- Nnh! That's just, ah,

how I roll. [Bell ringing]

Oh, shoot! I'm going to be late for that optional algebra class.

♪♪♪

What's going on? - I'm tracking a perp.

Whoever stole the last cookie went that-a-way.

- It's Derek.

- That's a rookie mistake. That's what the crook wants you to think.

♪♪♪

[Crunching] Oh!

- Hey, everybody! How do I look?

- Beautiful. Where are you guys going all dressed up?

- Emily's parents invited us to dinner.

- Oh, well it's a shame we're grounded, you know,

'Cuz we'd really love to go, but...

- You wouldn't happen to know anything about this,

ah, surprise invite, would ya'? - Nn-mm.

- Yeah, um, Emily said that her parents suddenly realized

that they hadn't seen you in quite some time, yeah?

So the, they thought about a dinner invite, you know? Ow!

- Yeah, well maybe there'll be a major crime spree

at the Davis's! - Yeah!

- C'mon, Sherlock. C'mon Watson.

- Have fun. - Feel free to stay out late. We don't mind.

♪♪♪

- It is so on!

High five! Hit it! Up top!

High five!

- What took you so long?

- [Whispering]: I snuck out my window and climbed down a tree.

- Why didn't you take the stairs?

- Because if I'm gonna sneak out I want the full experience.

- 'Kay, you don't need to whisper,

'Cuz nobody's home. Now can we go?

- Let me check my list.

- "Purple Fog"?

- Oh, yeah, yeah! It's covert operation "Purple Fog".

- You have a lot to learn about living dangerously.

- Danger? Danger is my middle name.

Ooh! Look, look!

I made us crust-less cucumber sandwiches for the trip!

[Trash can lid rattling]

[Garage door opening] Ah, excuse me?

Did you do a circle check around the car?

Did you reposition your mirrors, Derek?

[Thump!]

- Ooh!

I thought Dad took his car!

- To drive next door?

♪♪♪

I can't believe you dented the new car!

- Oh, maybe if you hadn't been shouting safety tips at me!

- Well, maybe if you'd listened to my safety tips! [Marti's voice]

- Shh! - I will not 'shh'! - Shh!

- [George]: So Marti. Where, where did you put your monkey?

- We're dead! We are so dead!

Oh, I hope at my funeral they have roses. Or white lilies. Those are nice, too.

- Just chillz. They went around the front.

We go in the back.

Quickly!

- I knew it. I knew it!

Derek and Casey aren't here!

[Phone ringing]

- That was close. - Too close.

- [George]: Hello? - Yeah! I'm outta here!

- Hello?

Anybody there? [Beep to hang up]

- What are you doing?

- Uh, answering the phone!

[Beep to turn on] Hello? Anybody there? - Ya, Derek is!

- Look, Casey and I are just playing hide and go seek,

but you can't tell Dad you saw us 'cuz it'll ruin the game, ok?

Go on. ♪♪♪

[Phone beeping]

- I didn't see them. - Hah.

- You're home?

- Ah! Where else would I be?

But here. Reading. This book. At home.

- I, ah, I thought you and Derek might've snuck out.

Can you believe that?

Well, I'll go say hi to Derek before we go back to the Davis's.

- Okay. Bye bye.

♪♪♪ [Sighing]

- Oh, hey, Derek.

- Oh, hey, Dad.

Uh.... Just surfing the 'net.

What're you doing home? Checking up on us, perhaps?

- Marti just missed her monkey so we had to come back.

Listen, you know what, about the whole grounding thing?

I think I may have over-reacted a bit.

- Don't sweat it there'll be other parties.

- Okay, okay. I better get back.

♪♪♪

- Hey! Ya' missed a sick party.

- You went to the party? - Yeah!

Ralph gave me a lift. Why, did you wanna come?

- Are you crazy? We dented our parents' new car!

I kept having this weird dream I was sent to a boarding school in Antarctica.

With penguins.

- Don't worry. I'm gonna get the car fixed and I'll have it back by 4.

- Or we could just confess. - Oh, great idea!

And I'll buy you a black and white parka so the penguins at school don't make fun of you.

- But you're doing a sneaky thing to correct another sneaky thing!

- That's pretty much how these things work.

♪♪♪

- Oh, hey guys!

George and I felt really bad about grounding you,

so we thought we'd make your favorite breakfast.

- Actually, I'm, I'm not really hungry.

- I'm starved. I'll have a bacon and cheese omelet and whatever Casey would've had.

- Yeah, well, just hang on because we're kinda out of bacon and eggs

and whatever Casey would've had but I got a better idea.

How 'bout I take us all out for breakfast?

- No! - No.

Actually, I am hungry.

But just for cereal.

- Oh! Well, as long as it's not oatmeal!

♪♪♪ [Phone ringing]

I'll get it. Hello.

Really? N...

No, no, no, no, that, that's okay.

No, that's okay. I'll, I'll be right there.

Right. Right. Bye-bye.

Well, I'm gonna have to take a rain check on that breakfast.

That trial? It's been pushed up.

I gotta go to the office, do some work.

- I'll drive you! - Why?

Derek, we're a two-car family now. See you later.

- Um, suddenly I'm not hungry.

- Me neither.

♪♪♪

What are you doing? - I'm calling George.

He'll go easy on us. He's a really kind and gentle person.

[George screaming]

- My new car!

- Oh! - Argh!

I don't believe it! My car... My car is dented!

- [Edwin]: Well, did you do it?

- No! What makes you say that?

- Because of your prior offences?

- What? - George there's something--

- No! It was a dent-and-run in the parking lot at work.

I, I, I just bet you it was one of the partners.

Oh, yeah, yeah! Yeah - just 'Cuz I've dinged all their cars!

- George, Derek and I-- - Know a great body shop.

- No, no, no. Thanks, anyway. Just, I, I prefer to deal with my own mechanic.

- Perfect! That'll give us time to gather evidence.

- Evidence? - Looks like we got our first big case!

- This perp needs to be brought to justice!

C'mon, Liz! Let's start sleuthing! - Yeah!

♪♪♪

[Knocking] - Good afternoon, Ms. MacDonald.

- Sorry to bug you, but, ah, we have a few questions, if you don't mind.

- Why would I know anything about George's car?

- He never said you did.

But it's interesting you say that you didn't.

- Yes! It is! But let's put the car-talk in park for a minute.

Now, tell us about hide and seek. - Hide and seek?

- Marti tells me she saw you and Derek playing hide 'n seek last night.

- And the way we see it, you're a little old for hide 'n seek.

- What? No, no! You're never too old for hide 'n seek!

- Of course.

Oh!

Ah, one more thing. If you don't mind.

- What? - It's about eye shadow.

Blue eye shadow with sparkles? You were wearing it Friday night.

- Yeah, so?

- So, you only wear that eye shadow if you're trying to impress a guy.

Why wear it when you're grounded?

- Maybe I just felt like it. I can wear whatever I want, can't I?

♪♪♪

- 'Course. It's probably nothing. Very sorry to bother you, ma'am.

- Thank you for your time.

♪♪♪

- Hey, Edwin. What's up? - Nothing.

Just playing with my very un-cool Super Sleuth kit.

- Aw, come on. You know I was just joking!

Detective stuff's totally cool. So what are you working on?

- I don't think George's car was hit while he was at work.

- He says it was. - The evidence says not.

- What evidence?

- The Purple Fog. - Purple Fog?

Oh, that's your evidence?

It's just one of Casey's lame school projects.

- Well, it's funny that you say it's a school project because it makes me wonder,

what kind of project?

- Why would I know? - I didn't say you did.

But what kind of project

requires black clothing and camouflage makeup?

- A drama project.

- I thought you didn't know?

- Call off your dogs, Venturi. Before someone gets hurt.

That's what had him all suspicious.

- He knows about Purple Fog! - Uh huh.

- What are we going to do? - Nothing!

It's just a matter of time before Edweirdo

gets bored of this whole detective schtick.

[Knocking]

- Edwin's calling a family meeting.

He's got an announcement to make.

♪♪♪

- I told you to leave this alone.

- Sorry, bro, but truth above all else. That is super Sleuth rule Number One.

[Sighing]

Ladies and gentlemen. Esteemed colleague.

Thank you for your time.

What is truth?

- Ed, can we, ah, hurry this along?

- Yeah, sure. Your car wasn't hit at work.

- It wasn't? Well, I didn't do it.

Not this time. - Oh, I know you didn't.

Someone else is responsible. Or rather, someones.

♪♪♪ - Someones?

- Yes. Accomplices living right here.

Late Friday night, at around 21:00 hours,

someone snuck down the tree in the backyard

to meet up with another someone in the garage.

And, then, after an altercation over cucumber sandwiches,

saw you coming home from Emily's house

and dented the car in a botched escape attempt.

And those someones are--

- It was us! - Oh, oh! - What?

- Derek and I snuck out and we accidentally hit your car.

I'm so sorry.

- What, 'cause, well, I thought that the raccoons...

who live in the rafters snuck down

and fought over sandwiches knocking a bike onto the car,

but the whole 'you did it' thing does make more sense.

- I told you there was no raccoon conspiracy.

- No, see Edwin's right! The raccoons did do it.

Good one, Casey! We really got 'em, huh?

- Gimme a break.

- Okay, so we did it. But it wa- it was an accident

and technically we didn't break our grounding

because we never left the house. - Then why did Ellen leave

a message for you saying she'd left her sunglasses at James Burton's party?

- Oh, well, there is that. - I swear I didn't go.

- No, but she almost did!

Which means that Casey and I are cooperating, right? - Well, that's good because

you're going to be spending a lot of time together.

Derek, you're grounded, again.

No car privileges for 2 months.

- And Casey, you're grounded as well. For 1 month.

- And for what it's worth, I am sorry.

- Me too. And relieved.

I just, I wish we had told you as soon as it happened,

as I told Derek repeatedly.

- Yes, well, you should have, Miss McDonald.

Because Super Sleuth Edwin Venturi always gets his man.

- Edwin. Hand. Off. Now.

- Right. Sorry.

♪♪♪

- Hello. - Hey!

- How's the knitting coming along? - Oh, great!

Ah, it started out as a sweater,

then became a blanket and now it's turning into a rug.

- I was gonna let you off a week early for good behavior,

but, um... if you wanna finish your rug--

- No! No! I hate knitting! Oh, thank you Mom! - Ah!

[Knocking] - Hey, Derek?

[Snoring]

Derek?

♪♪♪

Derek, Derek! Of all the nerve.

Oooh, that really burns me.

- Hi Dad. - What are you doing?

- I just wanted to see what would happen if I tried to sneak out again

and judging from your reaction, so not worth it.

♪♪♪

That's what had him all suspicious.

Sorry... [Gibberish]

- Cut! Turning around!

- Derek let go!

[Shattering]

- For staying up all night doing...

[Gibberish]

- I'm fine. - Just like... - I'm mighty fine.

- ♪ Living life with Derek ♪

♪ Living life with Derek ♪

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