All language subtitles for Desperate.Housewives.S06E05.1080p.WEB-DL.DD+.5.1.x264-TrollHD_track3_[und]

PREVIOUSLY ON...

I BOOKED OUR ROOM
AT THE MOTEL...

(whispers) AND I DON'T WANT
TO BE ALONE TONIGHT.
(whispers) NEITHER DO I.

AFFAIRS GOT SERIOUS...
IF YOU GOT HIT BY A BUS,
I'D REALLY MISS YOU.

YOU'RE SHOWERING ALONE
TONIGHT.

I LOVE YOU.
THERE. I SAID IT.

AN EX-LOVER...
WHY--WAIT.
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

JUST LETTING YOU KNOW
I'M HERE FOR YOU.
LET'S JUST SAY HE WAS GRATEFUL--
VERY GRATEFUL.

SPUN OUT OF CONTROL.

AAH!

YOU'RE FIRED.

AND WHEN A CRIME
WAS COMMITTED...
(gasps and chokes)

A NEIGHBOR WAS SUSPECTED.
EVERYBODY THINKS I'M THE PERV
WHO ATTACKED JULIE.

JUST IN CASE SOMEBODY SHOULD TRY
TO COME IN HERE AND HURT YOU,

DO YOU KNOW WHERE YOUR FATHER
AND I KEEP THE GUN?
BUT IT WAS THE VICTIM...

WHAT WERE YOU THINKING,
DATING A MARRIED MAN?
WHO HAD SECRETS.

HEY, JULIE, I MISS YOU.

(Mary Alice)
IT IS IN OUR NATURE

TO JUDGE THE PEOPLE AROUND US.

WE JUDGE
THE WAY STRANGERS DRESS...

THE WAY OUR NEIGHBORS
TEND THEIR LAWNS...

(Lee and Bob
shouting indistinctly)

AND THE WAY
OUR FRIENDS ACT IN PUBLIC.

(shouting continues)

YES, WE MAKE THESE JUDGMENTS
ALL THE TIME,

NEVER THINKING THAT ONE DAY

WE MAY BE JUDGED...

OURSELVES.

(footsteps running)

(thud)
(girl) OW!

GIRLS, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

OH, FOR PETE'S SAKE.
MY ARM.

WHAT DID I TELL YOU ABOUT
SLIDING DOWN THE STAIRCASE?

NOT TO USE THE GOOD SUITCASE?
BESIDES THAT.
DON'T DO IT AT ALL!

WELL, WHAT ARE WE
SUPPOSED TO DO?

YOU WON'T LET US PLAY
ON THE ROOF ANYMORE.

(knocks on door)
(under breath) OH, CRAP.

(normal voice) HEY, LAURA!
WHAT HAPPENED?

(Gabrielle) DON'T WORRY.
SHE'S OKAY.

THESE TWO KNUCKLEHEADS DECIDED
TO SLIDE DOWN THE STAIRCASE.

WHY WOULD YOU LET THEM
DO THAT?
OH, DON'T BLAME ME.
I WASN'T EVEN IN THE ROOM.

YOU LEFT THE GIRLS
UNSUPERVISED?

WELL, THEY WERE PLAYING.

COME ON. I CAN'T WATCH 'EM
EVERY SECOND.

WHY NOT? I LOOK AFTER JUANITA
WHEN SHE'S AT MY HOUSE,

AND SHE GOES HOME
WITHOUT A SCRATCH.

(chuckles) ONLY 'CAUSE
SHE'S INDESTRUCTIBLE.

HONEY, DO THAT THING
WHERE YOU RUN INTO THE WALL.

WATCH. THIS IS HILARIOUS.
YOU'RE PRETTY CAVALIER

CONSIDERING YOUR CARELESSNESS
ALMOST KILLED MY DAUGHTER.

(scoffs)

I GOTTA SAY, LAURA,

YOU'RE KIND OF A WET BLANKET
SINCE YOU QUIT SMOKING.

WHY DON'T YOU TRY A PIPE?

AND I'VE GOT TO SAY, GABY,

I THINK
YOU'RE A LOUSY MOTHER.

DID YOU JUST SAY THAT
TO MY FACE?
YES, AND I'M AFRAID

I WON'T BE BRINGING
MY DAUGHTER HERE ANYMORE.

THE SAFETY AND WELL-BEING
OF MY CHILD MUST COME FIRST.
FINE.

JUANITA ONLY HAD RACHEL OVER
BECAUSE SHE FELT SORRY FOR HER.

IT WAS A PITY PLAYDATE.

AND OF COURSE THIS MEANS

RACHEL WON'T BE ATTENDING
JUANITA'S BIRTHDAY PARTY.

MORE CAKE FOR US! BEAT IT!

LET'S GO, SWEETIE.

YES, IT'S IN OUR NATURE
TO JUDGE THOSE AROUND US.

IT'S ALSO IN OUR NATURE...

YOU KNOW,
IF YOU HAD TAUGHT YOUR KID

HOW TO TUCK AND ROLL
ON IMPACT,

WE WOULDN'T EVEN BE HAVING
THIS CONVERSATION!

TO BLAME SOMEONE ELSE
FOR OUR MISTAKES.

IT HAD BEEN TWO WEEKS

SINCE JULIE MAYER
HAD BEEN ATTACKED.

AND WHEN SHE CAME HOME
FROM THE HOSPITAL,

THE RESIDENTS OF WISTERIA LANE
WERE THERE TO WELCOME HER BACK.

SHE WAS GREETED BY CHILDREN
WHO CAME WITH SIGNS...

HOUSEWIVES WHO CAME
WITH DESSERTS...

AND OLD FRIENDS

WHO CAME WITH FLOWERS.

ALSO IN THE CROWD
WAS A NEW FRIEND...

WHO CAME WITH AN AGENDA.

YOU LOOK GREAT, JULIE.

I'M SO GLAD YOU GUYS CAME.

SEE YOU LATER.
BYE!

BYE.

HEY, JULIE.

WELCOME HOME.

LISTEN, I'VE BEEN SO WORRIED
ABOUT YOU.

IS THERE SOMEPLACE WE CAN GO
WHERE WE CAN TALK?

NO. WE'RE NOT DOING THIS
ANYMORE.

JULIE, PLEASE.

DOMINICK, I'M SORRY.

IT'S OVER.

HEY, MRS. McCLUSKEY!

(Gabrielle) BREE.

OH, HI.
I AM SO SORRY I'M LATE.

I HAVE THREE PARTIES
THIS WEEKEND,

AND I'M UP TO MY ELBOWS
IN CANAPéS.
WHY ISN'T KATHERINE
HELPING YOU?

I HAD TO LET HER GO.
WHAT?

(Lynette) YOU'RE KIDDING.
WE WERE WORKING THIS EVENT,
AND SHE WENT BERSERK.

AND THEN WHEN I FIRED HER,

SHE INTENTIONALLY SCRATCHED
MY CAR.

WOW. I FLIPPED HER THE BIRD
THE OTHER DAY

AFTER SHE CUT ME OFF.
WON'T MAKE THAT MISTAKE AGAIN.

I THINK SHE NEEDS HELP.
I THINK SHE'S A DRAMA QUEEN.

BUT IF SHE IS IN TROUBLE,
AND WE DON'T DO ANYTHING,

IT COULD BE MARY ALICE
ALL OVER AGAIN.

(sighs) I DON'T KNOW.
SUSAN, WHAT DO YOU THINK?

WELL, I KNOW SHE'S GOING THROUGH
A ROUGH TIME,

BUT I HAVE TROUBLE
FEELING SORRY FOR HER.

I GET THAT, AFTER THAT STUNT
SHE PULLED AT YOUR WEDDING.
(Bree) TRUE.

AND DID YOU TELL THEM ABOUT
KATHERINE HITTING ON MIKE?

WHAT?
WHEN DID THAT HAPPEN?

HE--HE DID MENTION IT,
DIDN'T HE?

OF COURSE. YEAH. UM, WE LAUGH
ABOUT IT ALL THE TIME.

(chuckles) UM, OH,
AND LOOK. THERE'S MIKE NOW,

AND I COULD USE A GOOD LAUGH.

WOULD YOU EXCUSE ME?

SWEETIE, CAN I TALK TO YOU
A SECOND?

IF IT WAS NO BIG DEAL,
WHY DIDN'T YOU JUST TELL ME?

JULIE WAS IN THE HOSPITAL.

I DIDN'T TELL YOU

BECAUSE I, CRAZY ME,
THOUGHT IT MIGHT UPSET YOU.
AND HERE'S WHY I'M UPSET--

'CAUSE NOW I REALIZE
THAT KATHERINE IS NOT HURTING.

SHE'S PLOTTING. SO I'M GONNA
GO OVER THERE RIGHT NOW--

NO, SUSAN, YOU DO NOT WANT
TO POUR GASOLINE ON THIS FIRE.

WELL, YOU'RE RIGHT. I WANNA
POUR GASOLINE ON KATHERINE.

AND IF YOU LOVE ME AT ALL,

YOU'LL GIVE ME A MATCH
AND AN ALIBI.
HONEY, LET HER HAVE HER LIES.
LET HER PLOT.

OH, YOU GOT NOTHING
TO WORRY ABOUT.

YOU MEAN EVERYTHING TO ME,
AND KATHERINE MEANS NOTHING.

WELL, THAT'S SWEET.

I'M GONNA GO TELL HER
YOU SAID THAT.

GET BACK HERE.

(laughs)

HEY.

WANNA TALK ABOUT IT?

YEAH, SURE.

LET'S--LET'S HAVE
A NICE FATHER/SON CHAT

ABOUT HOW
YOU'RE CHEATIN' ON MOM.

DO YOU KNOW
HOW STUPID I FELT?

I GOT INTO A HUGE FIGHT
WITH JULIE

'CAUSE I THOUGHT
SHE WAS LYING TO ME,

THAT SHE WAS JUST TELLING ME SHE
HAD A BOYFRIEND TO BLOW ME OFF.

AND I FOLLOWED HER HOME,
AND...

IT TURNS OUT SHE DOES HAVE
A BOYFRIEND--YOU.

I'M SORRY.

AND FOR WHAT IT'S WORTH,
IT'S OVER.

IF I EVER SEE
YOU TWO TOGETHER AGAIN...

I'M GONNA TELL MOM.

YOU WANNA TELL YOUR MOTHER?

YEAH, COME ON.

LET'S GO RIGHT NOW.
COME ON.

WHAT?

YOU THINK YOU CAN DANGLE
THAT AX OVER MY HEAD?

THEN GO FOR IT.

SO YOU WANT MOM TO KNOW?

YOU WANT TO DESTROY
HER LIFE?

YOUR MOM FINDING OUT THAT I HAD
AN AFFAIR WON'T DESTROY HER.

HER FINDING OUT THAT YOU KNEW
ABOUT IT? YEAH, THAT WILL.

YEAH, I'M THE BAD GUY.

YOU THINK YOUR MOM'S
THE PERFECT ONE

IN THIS MARRIAGE?

THERE YOU TWO ARE.

THEY'RE BRINGING OUT A CAKE
FOR JULIE.

EVERYTHING OKAY OUT HERE?

YEAH.

JUST HAVING
A LITTLE FATHER/SON CHAT.

THAT'S MY BOYS. OH, COME ON.
THEY'RE CUTTIN' THE CAKE.

(sighs)

(knocks on door)
COME IN!

HEY, KAREN.

LYNETTE, WHEN YOU'VE NEEDED
A FAVOR FROM ME,

HAVE I EVER LET YOU DOWN?

LAST MONTH WE NEEDED
A SITTER FOR PENNY,

BUT YOU DIDN'T WANT TO MISS
OKTOBERFEST.

AND JUST LAST THURSDAY--
OKAY, NEW WAY IN.

I GOT A PROBLEM WITH ROY.
HE'S BEEN KINDA DOWN LATELY.

OH, WHAT'S WRONG?
HE LIVES ON A FIXED INCOME

AND HE CAN'T AFFORD
TO PAY FOR NICE DINNERS.

BUT WHEN I PAY, HE SULKS.
HE SAYS I'M "KEEPING" HIM.

HELL, AT HIS AGE,
HE SHOULD BE GLAD

TO HAVE SOMETHING KEEPING HIM
BESIDES FORMALDEHYDE.

YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?
AND THE FAVOR WOULD BE?

WELL, I WAS THINKING
MAYBE YOU AND TOM

COULD HIRE HIM FOR A FEW HOURS
A WEEK AS A HANDYMAN.

YOU KNOW, SO HE'D HAVE
A LITTLE WALKING AROUND MONEY.

GEE, I DON'T KNOW.

OKAY, GIRL TALK TIME.

WHEN ROY'S SPIRITS ARE DROOPING,
THE PROBLEM IS GLOBAL.

YOU GET THE PICTURE?

GETTING THE PICTURE
ISN'T THE PROBLEM.

IT'S GETTING RID OF IT.
OH, COME ON.
TRY HIM FOR ONE WEEK.

I'M ONLY HESITANT
BECAUSE HE'S YOUR BOYFRIEND,

AND I'D HATE TO RISK
STRAINING A GOOD FRIENDSHIP.

WELL, IF I WERE
THAT GOOD A FRIEND,

WOULD I BE PUTTING YOU
IN THIS AWKWARD POSITION?

(chuckles) EXCELLENT POINT.

HE'S HIRED.

THANKS. YOU'LL NEVER KNOW WHAT
YOU'VE DONE FOR MY SEX LIFE.

GOOD.

(humming)

HMM.

(chuckles) I LOVE IT
THAT YOU DO THAT.

WHAT?

WHEN I FIRST
BROUGHT YOU HERE,

YOU DIDN'T WANT TO SET FOOT
IN THIS ROOM.

AND NOW YOU GET SAD
EVERY TIME WE HAVE TO LEAVE.

(chuckles) WELL,
IT'S NOW OUR PLACE.

IT'S NOT WHAT I WOULD'VE CHOSEN,
BUT IT'S GROWING ON ME.
(laughs)

(Jamaican accent) I'M SORRY.
I THOUGHT YOU CHECKED OUT.

MM.
(chuckles) IT'S OKAY.
WE'RE JUST GOING.

TIP'S ON THE DRESSER.

THANK YOU, SIR.
MM-HMM.

EXCUSE ME.

UM, I SEEM TO HAVE LOST
AN EARRING--A LITTLE PEARL STUD.

OH. I CAN HELP YOU
LOOK FOR IT.

THANK YOU.

(cell phone rings)
OH.

(beep)
HELLO?

OH, HI, ORSON.

NO, I TOLD YOU YOUR GRAY SUIT
IS AT THE TAILOR'S.

WHERE AM I NOW?

OH, AT THE SUPERMARKET
GETTING US SOMETHING FOR DINNER.

OH, YOU ALREADY DID
ALL THE SHOPPING? WELL, GREAT.

I WILL JUST PUT ALL THIS FOOD
AWAY AND COME STRAIGHT HOME.

BYE.
(beep)

HMM.

FOUND IT.
IT WAS BURIED IN THE SHEETS.

THANK YOU VERY MUCH. LET ME
GET YOU A LITTLE SOMETHING.

OH, MY WALLET'S HERE
SOMEWHERE.

THAT'S ALL RIGHT.

I'M SURE YOU'RE EAGER
TO GET HOME TO YOUR HUSBAND.

OH, OKAY. WELL,
THANKS FOR LETTING ME KNOW.

(beep)
(sighs)

WHAT'S WRONG?

HEIDI BREMER JUST INFORMED ME
HER KID CAN'T COME ON SATURDAY.

SHE AND DON ARE GOING
TO THE NURSING HOME

TO VISIT HIS MOTHER.
SO WHY ARE YOU MAD?

BECAUSE IT'S A LIE!
HEIDI HATES HIS MOTHER!

SHE WOULDN'T CROSS THE STREET
TO VISIT THAT DROOLING FOSSIL.

AND THAT'S THE THIRD
CANCELLATION I'VE GOTTEN TODAY,

AND EVERY EXCUSE
HAS BEEN A CROCK.

WHY WOULD PEOPLE LIE
TO GET OUT OF A KID'S PARTY?

BECAUSE LAURA MILLER'S OUT THERE
SPREADING HER POISON.

SHE'S TELLING EVERY WOMAN
IN THE P.T.A.

THEIR KIDS AREN'T SAFE
IN MY HOUSE.

THOSE HAUSFRAU CRONIES OF HERS
ARE LAPPING IT UP.

JUANITA WILL BE HEARTBROKEN
IF NO ONE COMES TO HER PARTY.

OH, NO, NO, NO, NO.
THEY'LL COME.

WE JUST HAVE TO BUILD IT,
THAT'S ALL.

THIS IS ABOUT TO COST ME MONEY,
ISN'T IT?

CARLOS, THERE ARE WOMEN
OUT THERE

WHO THINK I'M A BAD MOTHER.
IT IS YOUR JOB TO SUPPORT ME.

NOW JUST SHUT UP
AND FORK OVER SOME CASH.
(sighs deeply)

WOULDN'T IT BE EASIER TO JUST
WATCH THE KIDS WHILE THEY PLAY?

DID YOU JUST SAY THAT
TO MY FACE?

HERE.
TAKE THE WHOLE WALLET.

(scoffs)

VOILà. GRILLED LANGOUSTINE.
YOUR FAVORITE.

HOW VERY THOUGHTFUL
OF YOU, ORSON.

WELL, THEY WEREN'T EASY
TO FIND.

THE MAN AT ONE STORE
TRIED TO SELL ME SHRIMP.

AND WHEN I TRIED TO EXPLAIN
THE DIFFERENCE,

HE GAVE ME AN ARGUMENT.

WHAT IS IT WITH SERVICE PEOPLE
THESE DAYS?

THEY USED TO BE POLITE
AND DEFERENTIAL.

NOW THEY JUST SNEER
RIGHT IN YOUR FACE.

IT'S INTOLERABLE.

WELL, I WOULDN'T LET IT SPOIL
A NICE DINNER.

SORRY, I HAD A VERY IRKSOME
ENCOUNTER MYSELF TODAY.

REALLY? WHERE?

AT A... CAFé.

I WAS HAVING LUNCH,

AND THIS WAITRESS
WAS RUDE AND SUPERIOR.

SUPERIOR? TO YOU?

WELL, YOU SHOULD'VE
WHIPPED OUT

A COPY
OF YOUR BEST-SELLING COOKBOOK,

LIKE YOU DID LAST WEEK
IN THE FOOD COURT AT THE MALL.

WELL, I DOUBT THIS WOMAN
WOULD'VE BEEN IMPRESSED.

REALLY? WELL, YOU SURE PUT THAT
PRETZEL VENDOR IN HIS PLACE.

I WAS SO STARTLED,
I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY.

I JUST LET IT GO.

WELL, IS THIS A CAFé
YOU FREQUENT OFTEN?

AS OFTEN AS I CAN.
WELL, NEXT TIME
YOU'RE IN THERE,

I THINK YOU SHOULD
CLEAR THE AIR.

DEMAND A LITTLE COURTESY.

THANK YOU, ORSON.

I THINK I MAY
DO THAT TOMORROW.

THIS IS NICE, ISN'T IT?

SHARING A MEAL,
TALKING ABOUT OUR DAYS.

WHY DON'T YOU PASS
ON THAT CAFé TOMORROW

AND LET ME MAKE YOU
A NICE SALAD OR AN OMELET?

THANK YOU, DEAR,

BUT TOMORROW I'M PLANNING ON
HAVING SOMETHING A BIT SPICIER.

LYNETTE.

YEAH?

LOOK WHAT ROY DID.

OPEN. CLOSED. OPEN! CLOSED!

WE DON'T NEED TO USE
THAT SPATULA ANYMORE!

(laughs) THAT'S GREAT!

SO, ROY,
SINCE YOU'RE SO INGENIOUS,

HOW ABOUT YOU BUILD
SOME FLOWER BOXES

FOR OUR BEDROOM WINDOWS?
WELL, OUR WINDOW IF YOU WANT,
BUT NOT THE KIDS'.

WHY NOT?
'CAUSE THEY'LL NEVER
WATER 'EM.

OH, I'LL REMIND THEM.
THEY CAN'T KEEP A GOLDFISH ALIVE
FOR MORE THAN ONE DAY.

WHAT MAKES YOU THINK

THEY'RE GONNA TAKE BETTER CARE
OF GERANIUMS?

I DON'T KNOW. I JUST KNOW
WE'RE GETTING FLOWER BOXES.

SO, ROY, YOU COULD GO AHEAD
AND GET THOSE STARTED.

ARE YOU GOOD WITH THIS,
MR. SCAVO?

SURE. WHAT THE HELL.

OKAY, I'LL GO MEASURE
THE WINDOWS.

THANKS, ROY.

(door opens and closes)

WHAT WAS THAT?
WHAT?

HE JUST WENT OVER MY HEAD
TO YOU.

I KNEW I LIKED THAT GUY
THE MINUTE HE WALKED IN.

LOOK!

OPEN. CLOSED.

OPEN! CLOSED!

(children speaking indistinctly
and laughing)

HI, LAURA, KIRSTIN, HEIDI.

(woman) HI.
GABRIELLE.

I'M GLAD YOU'RE HERE, LAURA.
I WANTED TO APOLOGIZE.

THINGS GOT A LITTLE HEATED
THE OTHER DAY,

AND I THINK WE BOTH SAID
SOME THINGS WE DIDN'T MEAN.

I APPRECIATE THAT, GABRIELLE.

GOOD. WELL...

NOW THAT THAT'S BEHIND US,

IF RACHEL WOULD LIKE TO COME
TO JUANITA'S BIRTHDAY PARTY,

WE'D LOVE TO HAVE HER.

SORRY, BUT I'M STILL NOT
COMFORTABLE WITH THAT.
OH, THAT'S A SHAME.

WE'RE GONNA HAVE FACE PAINTING
AND A COTTON CANDY MACHINE...

(loudly) AND A CLOWN.
A CLOWN?! WHERE'S A CLOWN?!

OH, NOT HERE, SWEETIE. HE'LL BE
AT JUANITA'S BIRTHDAY PARTY

ON SATURDAY--THE ONE YOUR MOMMY
WON'T LET YOU GO TO.

I WANNA GO!
RACHEL, WE'LL TALK
ABOUT IT LATER.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING, GABY?

OH, I'M SORRY. SHE ASKED ME
A QUESTION. I JUST ANSWERED IT.

FOR EXAMPLE,
IF SHE WERE TO ASK ME

IF WE WERE HAVING
A BOUNCY HOUSE, I'D HAVE TO SAY,

"JUST THE BIGGEST BOUNCY HOUSE
YOU'VE EVER SEEN!"

OH, A BOUNCY HOUSE!
I LOVE BOUNCY HOUSES!
(girl) YEAH, I WANT--

IS THE CLOWN GONNA
BE IN THE BOUNCY HOUSE?

MAYBE,
BUT YOU'LL NEVER KNOW.

GABRIELLE, PLEASE.

YOU'RE RIGHT. I'M SORRY.
THIS IS CRUEL.

COME ON, JUANITA.
WE GOTTA BUY BANANAS.

THE PEOPLE AT YOUR PARTY

ARE GONNA WANT SOMETHING
TO FEED THE MONKEY.
(girls gasp)

A MONKEY?!
MOMMY! MOMMY! MOMMY!

I WANNA GO!
(girl) PRETTY PLEASE!

WE'LL TALK ABOUT IT LATER.
WE'LL TALK ABOUT IT LATER.

PLEASE? PLEASE? PLEASE?
IT'S NOT FAIR!

(girl) I WANNA GO!
(girls whining)

(knock on door)

EXCUSE ME?

DID YOU NEED SOMETHING
IN YOUR ROOM?

AH, NO, I'M NOT CHECKED IN.
I CAME HERE TO SEE YOU.

I DON'T HAVE ANY WEED,
LADY.

SORRY?

ALL YOU LADIES
WITH THE NICE CARS

THINKS ANYONE WHO TALKS LIKE
THIS MUST HAVE GANJA TO SELL.

I AM NOT HERE TO BUY GANJA.

I CAME ABOUT YESTERDAY.

I APPRECIATED YOU
FINDING MY EARRING,

BUT I DIDN'T CARE
FOR YOUR ATTITUDE.

IT WAS VERY INSULTING.

DID I SAY
ONE CROSS WORD TO YOU?

YOU DIDN'T NEED TO.

YOUR DISDAIN WAS PERFECTLY CLEAR
FROM THE LOOK YOU GAVE ME.

AND THERE IS IT AGAIN.

(scoffs) I HAVE 12 ROOMS TO DO.
I DON'T HAVE TIME TO ARGUE.

FINE. THEN I'LL HELP.

LADY, PLEASE.

I WON'T LOOK AT YOU
NO MORE, OKAY?
I'M JUST SAYING

YOU SHOULDN'T MAKE
SNAP JUDGMENTS ABOUT PEOPLE.

YOU SEE I'M HAVING AN AFFAIR,

AND YOU JUST ASSUME I'M A BAD
PERSON... AND A DOPE FIEND.

IF YOU KNEW MORE
ABOUT MY MARRIAGE,

YOU'D SEE ME
VERY DIFFERENTLY.

I DON'T NEED TO KNOW
ABOUT YOUR MARRIAGE.

IF YOU'RE GOING TO FORM OPINIONS
ABOUT IT, THEN YES, YOU DO.

MY HUSBAND IS
A CONTROLLING EX-CON.

I'VE BEGGED HIM FOR A DIVORCE,
BUT HE WON'T LET ME GO.

I'M PRACTICALLY HIS PRISONER.
YOUR HUSBAND'S A GOOD MAN.

YOU KNOW NOTHING ABOUT HIM.

I KNOW HE DOES YOUR SHOPPING
FOR YOU.

WHEN YOU LIED TO HIM
ON THE PHONE,

TOLD HIM YOU WERE
AT THE GROCERY STORE.

HE SAID HE ALREADY WENT.

AND YOUR POINT IS?
YOU KNOW WHAT I WOULD GIVE

TO HAVE A MAN
DO MY SHOPPING FOR ME,

MAKE MY LIFE
A LITTLE BIT EASIER?

AND YOU'RE NOT EVEN GRATEFUL.
YOU'RE JUST SNEAKING OFF HERE

TO DO THE NASTY
WITH YOUR BOYFRIEND.

WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?

YOU CAN'T EVEN MAKE
HOSPITAL CORNERS!

WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO SAY,
LADY, HUH?

THAT CHEATING'S NOT A SIN
WHEN YOU DO IT IN PEARLS?

NOW UNLESS YOU WANT TO START ON
THE TOILET, I THINK WE'RE DONE.

WOW.

THESE FLOWER BOXES
ARE REALLY COMING ALONG.

IF YOU HAVE A MOMENT--
NO RUSH--

WOULD YOU HANG THIS BIRDHOUSE
FOR ME?

I WAS THINKING
ON THAT BIG TREE.

YOU GOT IT.

OH, THANKS.

ROY?

OVER THERE. THAT TREE.

YEAH, I WAS TALKING TO TOM
ABOUT IT THIS MORNING,

AND, UH, HE WANTS IT
OVER HERE.

OKAY, WELL,
THAT'S PROBABLY BECAUSE

HE FORGOT THE SPRINKLERS
GO OFF OVER THERE.

SO DO ME A FAVOR
AND HANG IT IN THAT TREE.

THANK YOU.

(speaking indistinctly)

'CAUSE SHE'S TELLING ME
SHE WANTS IT

ON THE OTHER SIDE
OF THE YARD.

ROY?
GOTTA GO.

BOY, YOU'RE EVERYWHERE.

WE SHOULD GET YOU A BELL.

WHY YOU CALLING TOM?

TO MAKE SURE HE'S OKAY WITH
WHERE YOU WANNA HANG THIS THING.

I MEAN, HE IS
THE MAN OF THE HOUSE.

OKAY, I KNOW,
SINCE YOU'RE USING A CELL PHONE,

YOU KNOW WHAT CENTURY IT IS,
BUT JUST TO CLARIFY--

YOU DON'T HAVE TO
KEEP CHECKING WITH TOM.

I MAKE PLENTY OF DECISIONS
AROUND HERE.

I NOTICED.

I JUST PREFER TO TREAT THE GUY
WITH A LITTLE RESPECT.

EXCUSE ME?

JUST 'CAUSE YOU LIKE CRUNCHING
HIS WALNUTS DOESN'T MEAN I DO.

I BEG YOUR PARDON!

HIS WALNUTS
ARE COMPLETELY INTACT!

AND YOU KNOW WHAT? I THINK
WE ARE DONE HERE. YOU CAN GO.

FINE. SOON AS I HANG
THIS BIRDHOUSE.

OH, AND HE SAID
HE DOESN'T CARE WHERE IT IS,

SO YOU WIN... AGAIN.

THIS ISN'T ABOUT WINNING!

AND I JUST FIRED YOU,
SO YOU CAN GO HOME.

NO. I PROMISED TOM I'D DO THIS,
AND I'M DOING IT.
YOU KNOW--

(grunts)

I'D CLEAN THAT UP,
BUT YOU JUST FIRED ME.

(gasps)
OH, MY GOD! I'M SO SORRY.

OH!
I THOUGHT YOU SAW ME.

NO. UH, NO.
NO, IT'S--IT'S OKAY.

I WAS JUST...

YEAH, I SHOULDA REALIZED.
I'M SORRY.

I GUESS YOU HEARD
THAT AFTER IT HAPPENED,

SOME PEOPLE THOUGHT THAT--

OH, UM... I KNOW
IT WASN'T YOU, DANNY.

HEY, THAT NIGHT WE ARGUED,

YOU SAID
YOU WERE SEEING A GUY.

YOU THINK MAYBE HE HAD
SOMETHING TO DO WITH IT?

UM, I THOUGHT ABOUT IT,
BUT NO.

HE'S NOT THAT KIND OF GUY.

SO YOU HAVE NO IDEA?

I WISH I DID.

I HAVEN'T BEEN ABLE
TO SLEEP.

EVERY TIME I'M ABOUT
TO CLOSE MY EYES,

I'M AFRAID HE'LL BE THERE
WHEN I WAKE UP.

YOU KNOW WHAT?

I THINK I MIGHT
HAVE SOMETHING TO HELP.

(closes box)

THANK YOU, ALL,
FOR VOLUNTEERING.

HERE'S THE THING.

WHOEVER ATTACKED JULIE
IS STILL OUT THERE,

SO IT'S UP TO US TO LOOK OUT
FOR EACH OTHER,

WHICH IS WHERE
THE NEIGHBOR WATCH COMES IN.

SO SUSAN'S GONNA TALK TO YOU
ABOUT PATROL DUTY.

SUSAN?

SUSAN?

UH, WHAT IS SHE PATROLLING FOR?
HIS TONSILS?

UM, WE STILL NEED PEOPLE FOR
9:00 TO MIDNIGHT ON THURSDAY.

ANY VOLUNTEERS?

(under breath)
"PROJECT RUNWAY."

UH, OKAY,
WE HAVE, UH, MONA CLARKE...

AND IRMA PRITCHET.

NO ONE ELSE?

OKAY, MEETING ADJOURNED.

THERE'S COFFEE
BACK IN THE KITCHEN.

(indistinct conversations)

UH, MRS. PRITCHET'S GOT
A CLOGGED SHOWER DRAIN,

AND I PROMISED
I'D FIX IT FOR HER.
MMM.

I DON'T THINK SHE SAW THAT ONE.
YOU WANNA DO IT AGAIN?

I'LL SEE YOU AT HOME.

SUSAN?

A WORD?

DID YOU NOT SEE MY HAND UP?
I WAS TRYING TO VOLUNTEER.

I SAW. I WAS JUST TRYING
TO PICK THE PEOPLE

WHO I THOUGHT COULD BEST
PROTECT OUR NEIGHBORHOOD.

SO YOU PICKED IRMA PRITCHET?
HER SON IS IN A NURSING HOME.

YES, KATHERINE,
IRMA IS OLD,

BUT SHE'S NOT
A BIG FAT LIAR.

(scoffs) EXCUSE ME?

WELL, ARE YOU NOT
GOING AROUND

SAYING THAT MY HUSBAND
HIT ON YOU?

(laughs) SUSAN...

I KNOW YOU'RE UNDER
A TERRIBLE STRAIN,

BUT DO YOU REALLY THINK
IT'S A GOOD IDEA TO AIR...

(whispers) YOUR DIRTY LAUNDRY
IN FRONT OF ALL THESE PEOPLE?

YOU'RE THE ONE
WITH DIRTY LAUNDRY.

MY LAUNDRY IS CLEAN, FOLDED
AND PUT AWAY, YOU LOON.

UM, GIRLS?
EVERYTHING ALL RIGHT HERE?

NO, IT'S NOT.

FIRST SHE CALLS ME A LIAR,

AND NOW I'M A LOON.

OKAY, YOU ALL HEARD THE THINGS
SHE WAS SAYING.

YOU SAW THE WAY SHE ACTED
AT MY WEDDING.

NOT EVERYONE WAS INVITED
TO YOUR WEDDING.

JEEZ, MONA. YOU'RE LIKE A DOG
WITH A BONE. LET IT GO.

I UNDERSTAND
WHY YOU'RE UPSET.

I'D BE ON EDGE, TOO,

IF MY MARRIAGE
WERE HAVING PROBLEMS.

OKAY, MIKE AND I ARE
PERFECTLY HAPPY,

AND THE ONLY PROBLEM WE HAVE
IS YOU.

SO STAY OUT OF OUR LIVES,
OR YOU'LL BE SORRY.

WELL, IF YOU TWO
ARE SO HAPPY.

THEN WHERE DID HE JUST
DISAPPEAR TO?

(groans) HE'S SNAKING
A LADY'S DRAIN, OKAY?

AND, YES,
I REALIZE HOW THAT SOUNDED.

GET YOUR MINDS
OUT OF THE GUTTER.

(children laughing
and speaking indistinctly)

OKAY, RACHEL, HAVE FUN.

COCO THE CLOWN WILL MAKE YOU
ANY BALLOON ANIMAL YOU WANT.

UH, YOU KNOW, MAYBE I SHOULD
STAY FOR A LITTLE WHILE.

OH, COME ON.
I'M WATCHING THEM.

I'VE GOT EVERYTHING
UNDER CONTROL.

WILL YOU BE HERE?

(scoffs)

COULD YOU BELIEVE HER?
I'M A GOOD MOM, AREN'T I?

PEOPLE TRUST ME.
HEY, I BROUGHT MY KID,
DIDN'T I?

YES, YOU DID.

BUT WAIT. YOU'RE STAYING.

I'LL GET US DRINKS.

HI, SWEETIE. WHAT'S THE MATTER?
AREN'T YOU HAVING A GOOD TIME?

THE MAN IS PUTTING
THE MONKEY AWAY.

HE SAID HE WAS TOO TIRED
TO PLAY ANYMORE.

OH, I DON'T THINK SO. THAT APE
IS ON THE CLOCK TILL 4:00.

HEY! WHAT GIVES?

SORRY. MR. FIBBS DID TWO SHOWS
YESTERDAY. HE NEEDS A NAP.

NO WAY. I PAID
FOR TWO HOURS OF MONKEY.

I WANT TWO HOURS OF MONKEY.

LET HIM GO.
I CAN DO THE GIG ALONE.

NO OFFENSE, COCO,

BUT I NEED THIS TO BE
THE GREATEST PARTY EVER,

AND YOUR ACT ISN'T EXACTLY
ZINGIN' THE KIDS.
HEY, I KILLED
AT YOUR OTHER KID'S PARTY.

THOSE KIDS WERE 3! THESE ARE
7-YEAR-OLDS! THE BIG TIME!

CRAPPY BALLOON ANIMALS
AIN'T GONNA CUT IT!

WE NEED THE MONKEY!
LADY, HE'S TIRED.

WELL, THEN GIVE HIM SOME
BANANA-FLAVORED COFFEE.

YOU SCREW ME ON THIS,
AND I SWEAR,

FIBBS WILL NEVER WORK
IN THIS TOWN AGAIN.

(knock on door)
COME IN.

YOU CALLED FOR A LIGHTBULB?

THE BEDSIDE LAMP.

I SAW YOU PULL IN
AN HOUR AGO.

(lamp rattling)
YOUR GENTLEMAN FRIEND
STAND YOU UP?

SORRY TO DISAPPOINT YOU, BUT HE
JUST CALLED. HE'S ON HIS WAY.

HMM. THAT'S NICE.

(click)

WELL, IF YOU FINISH
YOUR MAGAZINE,

THERE'S A BIBLE
IN THE NIGHTSTAND.

TELL ME SOMETHING.

DID HE CHEAT ON YOU JUST ONCE
OR DID HE DO IT ALL THE TIME?

WHO?

I'VE BEEN WONDERING
WHAT MAKES A WOMAN

SO QUICK TO JUDGE ANYONE
WHO HAS AN AFFAIR,

AND I THINK I KNOW.

YOUR HUSBAND CHEATED ON YOU,
DIDN'T HE?

(sighs)

MY HUSBAND...

WAS THE BEST MAN
THAT I EVER KNEW.

BUT A GOOD MAN

WASN'T GOOD ENOUGH FOR ME.

I WAS LIKE YOU.

I WANTED FUN, EXCITEMENT,

SO I FOUND MYSELF
A BOYFRIEND.

GOOD-LOOKING GUY. SEXY.

AND WE HAD OURSELVES
A REAL GOOD TIME.

YOU HAVING A GOOD TIME,
LADY?

YES, I AM.

ENJOY IT WHILE IT LASTS.

IT DIDN'T LAST LONG FOR ME.

AND WHEN IT WAS DONE,

I HAD NO HUSBAND
AND NO BOYFRIEND.

SO NOW I'M CLEANING ROOMS.

EVERY DAY, I SEE WOMEN IN HERE
ACTING JUST AS STUPID AS I WAS.

I DON'T SAY A WORD TO THEM.

I JUST GIVE THEM A LOOK.

WELL, I'M...

SORRY YOUR AFFAIR
ENDED SO BADLY.

BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN
THAT MINE WILL.

(turns off faucet)

YOU SEEM LIKE A NICE LADY.

DON'T YOU EVER FEEL GUILTY?

NO.

YES, ALL RIGHT?

YES, I FEEL GUILTY
ALL THE TIME.

YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE
WHEN I COME HOME,

AND MY HUSBAND'S AT THE DOOR

AND THERE'S SUCH LOVE
IN HIS EYES, SUCH...

HOPE.

AND I WANNA SHAKE HIM
AND SAY, "STOP IT.

STOP LOVING ME.
I'M NOT WORTH IT ANYMORE."

DON'T YOU WANT
TO BE WORTH IT AGAIN?

HI, HONEY, I'M SO SORRY.

IS THERE SOME KIND
OF PROBLEM?

NO, SIR.

JUST TURNING ON A LIGHT.

THERE YOU ARE.

NOW IT'S A KIDS' PARTY.
(laughs)
(chuckles)

ARE YOU STILL MAD
ABOUT LAURA?

THE PARTY'S A SUCCESS. THE KIDS
ARE HAVING A GREAT TIME.

WE'RE DRINKIN' MARGARITAS.
WHAT'S NOT TO LIKEY?

(chuckles) YOU KNOW WHAT?
YOU'RE RIGHT.

I WON.

(clink)
(laughs)

LAURA AND HER STUCK-UP POSSE

THOUGHT HER KIDS
WEREN'T SAFE IN MY HOUSE.

I'VE SHOWN THEM THE BEST TIME
THEY'RE GONNA HAVE ALL YEAR.
(children screaming)

UM, GABY?

I KNOW. THEY'RE LOUD.
KIDS! ADULTS TALKING!

NO, I THINK
THAT THERE'S A PROBLEM.

M.J.? M.J., WHAT'S GOIN' ON?
THE MONKEY'S KILLING THE CLOWN!

(screaming continues)

(monkey screeching)

(gasps)
I'VE GOTTA GET
MY TRANQUILIZER GUN.

I TOLD YOU HE NEEDED A NAP!

HE WAS ALREADY ON EDGE,

AND THEN THAT DAMN CLOWN
POPPED A BALLOON IN HIS FACE!

(groaning)

(gasps)

(grunting)

OH!

(screeches)

LAURA,
I WAS HERE EVERY MINUTE!

IT'S NOT MY FAULT THEY SENT US
A HOMICIDAL MONKEY!

W--AND THE IMPORTANT PART
IS THE KIDS HAD A GOOD TIME

AND CREATED
LIFELONG MEMORIES.

(Coco groans)

HEY, YOU FORGOT
YOUR GOODY BAG!

(sighs)

SO I STILL DON'T GET
WHY YOU FIRED ROY.

I MEAN, HE WAS
PUTTING THE BIRDHOUSE

WHERE YOU WANTED IT, RIGHT?

IT'S NOT ABOUT THAT.
HE SAID I EMASCULATE YOU.

HE SAID THAT?
WELL, NOT IN THOSE WORDS.

HE WENT WITH A MORE COLORFUL
NUTCRACKING ANALOGY.

(laughs) HE IS FUNNY.
HE IS NOT FUNNY!

AND THIS WOULD BE
A REALLY GOOD PLACE

FOR YOU TO JUMP IN AND TELL ME
I'M NOT A CASTRATING BITCH.

SURE. JUST PUT DOWN
THE KNIFE FIRST.

WOW. WE ARE NOT LAUGHING
AT THIS AT ALL, HUH?

NO!
OH, COME ON, BABE.

WE'RE GREAT. YOU KNOW THAT.
WHAT DO YOU CARE WHAT HE THINKS?

I DON'T CARE. IT'S JUST--
IT BUGS ME THAT HE'S JUDGING ME.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH THAT?
I THOUGHT I'D BARBECUE
SOME CHICKEN.

MM. IT'S ALMOST DINNERTIME,
AND THAT'S STILL FROZEN.

JUST GET SOME BURGERS
FROM THE GARAGE.

YOU GOT IT.

HEY, ROY.
CAN I TALK TO YOU?

SURE THING, PALLY.
HERE. TAKE A LOAD OFF.

(both chuckle)

IF IT'S ABOUT ME GETTING INTO IT
WITH YOUR WIFE, THOUGH,

I HAVE TO STOP YOU FIRST
AND SAY I'M SORRY.

WELL, THANKS.

I MEAN, I KNOW
TIMES HAVE CHANGED,

BUT A MAN'S STILL A MAN,

AND YOU DESERVE
TO HAVE YOUR WIFE RESPECT YOU.

SHE RESPECTS ME PLENTY,
ROY.

MM.

HERE'S THE THING

YOU GOTTA UNDERSTAND
ABOUT LYNETTE.

SHE GREW UP WITHOUT HER DAD.
HER MOM WAS A DRINKER.

SO SHE HAD TO BE RESPONSIBLE
FOR EVERYONE.

YEAH, WELL, THAT'S ROUGH.

YEAH.

IT LEFT HER
WITH THIS CONSTANT FEAR

THAT EVERYTHING
COULD SUDDENLY FALL APART.

AND THAT'S WHY SHE NEEDS
TO CONTROL EVERYTHING.

OF COURSE, SHE CAN'T.

NOBODY CAN.

BUT...

SHE CAN CONTROL ME...

IF I LET HER.

SO I DO...

BECAUSE IT MAKES HER
FEEL SAFE.

AND THAT IS MY JOB

AS HER HUSBAND...

(opens beer can)

TO MAKE HER FEEL SAFE.

YOU'RE A GOOD MAN, SCAVO.

I TRY.

NOW...
IF YOU'LL EXCUSE ME,

I HAVE HAMBURGER TO FETCH.

(chuckles)

MMM. (kisses)

STOP BEATING YOURSELF UP.
IT WASN'T THAT BAD.

CARLOS, A MONKEY
ALMOST KILLED A CLOWN.

THAT IS THE DEFINITION
OF A BAD CHILDREN'S PARTY.

(laughs)

(groans) MAN.

LAURA'S RIGHT.
I'M A TERRIBLE MOM.

HEY. COME HERE.

LOOK... (sighs)

I AM NO EXPERT
AT RAISING CHILDREN.

ALL I KNOW IS,

WHEN ALL THOSE OTHER KIDS
RAN SCREAMING TO THEIR MOMS,

JUANITA JUMPED
IN THE BOUNCY HOUSE

AND ZIPPED IT UP,
AND CELIA PLAYED DEAD.

THOSE GIRLS ARE SMART.

(chuckles) YEAH. THEY WERE QUICK
ON THEIR FEET, WEREN'T THEY?

WHICH THEY WOULDN'T BE

IF YOU'D BEEN HOVERING
ALL OVER 'EM THEIR WHOLE LIVES.

THEY HAVE LEARNED TO BE
INDEPENDENT AND RESOURCEFUL,

AND THAT IS THANKS
TO YOUR NEGLIGENCE.

MMM. SO SWEET.

(chuckles)

(loud thumping)
(girl) OW!

THAT BETTER NOT BE
THE GOOD SUITCASE!

(Julie) MOM!

JULIE?

JULIE?!

SWEETIE?

GET MIKE!

HE'S ON A JOB.
WHAT'S GOING ON?
SOMEBODY IS OUTSIDE.

(gasps) OH, MY GOD.
WHAT IS THAT?!

IT'S A GUN.
WHERE DID YOU GET THAT?!

GIVE THAT TO ME.
WHAT ARE YOU THINKING?

(gasps)

IT'S LOADED, RIGHT?

I HAVE A GUN!

I'VE CALLED THE POLICE!
THEY'LL BE HERE ANY MINUTE!

(rustling)

(gasps)

(gasps)
(thud)

(dogs barking in distance)

KATHERINE?

(gasps) YOU SHOT ME!

(gasps)

OH, MY GOD! KATHERINE,
THE GUN JUST WENT OFF!

ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?
YOU TRIED TO KILL ME!

OKAY, I JUST SHOT YOU. LET'S NOT
BE THROWING ACCUSATIONS AROUND.
IT LOOKS LIKE
IT JUST GRAZED YOUR SHOULDER.

THERE'S HARDLY ANY BLOOD.

WHAT HAPPENED?
SUSAN SHOT ME! CALL THE POLICE!

I TOLD YOU SHE WAS GONNA SNAP.
IT'S ALWAYS THE PRETTY ONES.
IT WAS AN ACCIDENT.

BOB, I WANT YOU TO BE MY LAWYER.
NO, NO, I CALL BOB
AS MY LAWYER.

WE HEARD A GUN GO OFF. (gasps)

SUSAN SHOT ME!
(gasps) SUSAN!

I DIDN'T KNOW IT WAS HER.

WHAT WERE YOU DOING
SNEAKING AROUND MY HOUSE?
I WAS ON NEIGHBORHOOD WATCH!

YOU DIDN'T HAVE
AN ASSIGNED SHIFT.
TOM SCAVO HAD TO STUDY.
HE ASKED ME TO FILL IN!

WELL... YOU SHOULD'VE
CHECKED WITH ME.

THAT'S WHAT I WAS TRYING TO DO
WHEN YOU SHOT ME!

OW!
ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT.
EVERYBODY, JUST CALM DOWN.

I'M GONNA GO CALL
AN AMBULANCE.

PERHAPS WE SHOULD UNLOAD THIS
BEFORE SOMEONE ELSE GETS HURT.

BREE, DEAR?

SUSAN JUST SHOT
KATHERINE MAYFAIR.

WHAT?

SHE'S OKAY,
BUT SHE'S--SHE'S FREAKED OUT.

(dialing telephone)
HUH. I NEVER PEGGED SUSAN
AS A GUN OWNER.

OH, CRAP.
(beep)

IT'S OUR GUN.
I GAVE IT TO JULIE.

WHAT? WHY?

SHE WAS SACRED.
SHE WANTED PROTECTION.

THAT GUN IS UNDER
OUR REAL NAME!

IF THEY TRACE THAT BACK
TO US--

WELL, WE ARE NOT GOING
TO LET THAT HAPPEN.

YOU'RE GOING TO JAIL FOR THIS.

EVERYONE HEARD YOU YOU--AAH!
THREATEN ME AT THAT MEETING.

I HAVE WITNESSES.

OH, PLEASE.
IF I WERE GONNA KILL YOU,

I WOULDN'T DO IT
IN MY OWN FRONT YARD.

I'D SNEAK INTO YOUR HOUSE
AND SHOOT YOU

WHILE YOU WERE ASLEEP.

NOT THAT I WOULD EVER
DO THAT.

(sighs)

KATHERINE,
WHERE ARE YOU GOING?

HOME, TO CALL THE POLICE.

(groans)

HEY, KATHERINE,
THE AMBULANCE IS ON ITS WAY.

BUT I BROUGHT
A FIRST AID KIT.

WHY DON'T YOU LET ME CLEAN
YOU UP, AND THEN YOU CAN CALL?

OW! OW! (inhales sharply)

JUST LEAVE IT!

HAND ME THE PHONE.
I WANNA CALL THE POLICE.
UH...

MM. DUMB MOVE, KATHERINE.

WHAT?

(sighs) LISTEN TO ME.

YOU AND MIKE...
I SEE IT, TOO.

THOSE LOOKS HE GIVES YOU?

HE'S STILL CRAZY ABOUT YOU.

I KNOW!

SO... USE YOUR HEAD.
YOU WANNA CALL THE POLICE

AND HAVE THE MOTHER OF HIS KID
CARTED OFF TO JAIL?

DON'T BE STUPID.
HIGH ROAD ALL THE WAY.

THAT'S A GOOD POINT.

MM-HMM, AND BESIDES,
YOU WALK AROUND

WITH A BANDAGE ON YOUR SHOULDER
FOR A FEW DAYS--

SHE LOOKS LIKE A MONSTER,

AND YOU COME OFF
LOOKING LIKE A SAINT.

(door opens)

SO HOW WE DOIN' HERE?

(singsongy) I'M FINE!

YEAH.

I DON'T THINK WE'LL BE NEEDING
THAT AMBULANCE ANYMORE. HMM?

(Lee) I'M TELLING YOU, IF YOU
COULD REALLY SEE HER EYES...

(sighs) SO AM I GOING TO JAIL?
NAH.
SHE'S NOT CALLING ANYBODY.

SHE'S A LITTLE WORKED UP,
BUT WE TALKED.

IT'S GONNA BE OKAY.

OKAY, THEN.

IT IS IN OUR NATURE
TO JUDGE THE PEOPLE AROUND US.

IF THEY IGNORE OUR WISHES,

WE BELIEVE
THEY ARE DISRESPECTFUL.

IF THEY DON'T WATCH
THEIR CHILDREN,

WE CONCLUDE
THEY ARE UNFIT PARENTS.

(door closes)

IF WE CATCH THEM CHEATING,

WE ASSUME
WE KNOW THEIR REASONS.

BUT WHAT HAPPENS WHEN
WE FINALLY STOP FOR A MOMENT

TO JUDGE OUR OWN LIVES?

IT CAN BE PAINFUL

TO STEP BACK AND SEE
WHAT WE'VE BEEN DOING...

AND EVEN MORE PAINFUL
TO REALIZE

WE HAVE NO INTENTION

OF STOPPING.