Original subtitles

-I'm Shawn Ruddy, and I'm a piece of trash.

I'm Shawn Ruddy, the world's biggest wuss.

And because I love attention and hate myself,

I'm facing all of my fears one dumb ass challenge at a time.

Help!

Ah!

Stop! Muchachos!

Hey, douchebags!

What did you say?

- Oh - Hey!

This is "The Wrath of Shawn."

Welcome to "The Wrath of Shawn." Happy Halloween!

Ah!

No, no, no!

Help!

Ah!

Hadouken!

I'm back!

After six months of eating ramen noodles

with chopped up bits of Vienna sausages, I am monetized again.

But I don't care about that stuff.

I don't care about money.

I care about you.

For seven years now, you have watched me face

my fears for your entertainment.

And I'm happy to announce I've faced them all.

Not.

There is one fear that I haven't yet faced.

Something I fear more than cops. More than sharks.

More than playing bingo with the elderly.

I, Shawn Ruddy, and mortally terrified of...

ghosts.

-I was raised in a religious home.

I believe in that stuff. I hate that stuff.

I haven't seen a horror movie

since the first half of "Ghost Dad."

And that's why I hate myself for what I'm about to say.

For my next livestream event,

I will be spending one night alone in a haunted house.

If there are ghosts in the house,

it's pretty much a guarantee that I'm going to piss them off.

That's why my mom packed me this paranormal kit.

Holy water, a crucifix, salt, garlic, and a silver dagger.

I have come up with one rule that you and the sponsors

can hold me to... if I see or hear anything unusual,

I have to check it out.

If you let me break this rule, I will not get paid.

I will not get paid.

This is on you now, Internet.

Tune into my Livvid channel on October 20th,

11:00 p.m. Mountain Standard Time

for the biggest comeback event since the first Easter.

I'll see you then.

Don't forget to smash that like button,

smash that subscribe button, and follow me on Livvid.

Welcome to "The wrath of Shawn."

These shirts are available right now in my merch store,

and as always,

I've composed a score specifically for this broadcast.

I'm calling this one "Shawn Carpenter's Halloween."

Available now on iTunes.

Okay, this is Shawn Ruddy,

coming to you live from...

Death Manor.

I'm doing a dramatic push in, if you can't tell.

This is the most haunted house in the United States.

And by that, I mean the most haunted

but not too famous for me to film in house.

And I'm spending the night there.

I've had the nervous poops all week.

But no matter what happens to me,

I am committed to bringing you

the most cinematic experience in live streaming.

I've got my Livvid bracelet right here.

So when I flick my wrist, this will cut back and forth

from my selfie camera, my P.O.V. cam.

Okay.

Now, this next part is called protecting me from myself.

I need to remove any temptation of an easy exit.

I know me way too well.

I've done a lot of stupid things before,

but I've never been completely alone while doing that.

If you're just tuning in,

I am about to make my approach to Death Manor.

Death Manor was built in 1880 by a wealthy Mormon pioneer

for his social outcast daughter, a poet named Mildred Pratt.

Mildred would later commit suicide

and become the first of many deaths in this house.

Did her suicide curse the house?

Or was Mildred the victim of an already cursed house?

That's not a good sign.

This is not going well for me.

I'm not a big fan of these woods.

They actually found a body out here a few years ago.

The face was completely eaten by rats.

Was it related to the power of this house?

Maybe.

Maybe it was also...

A stick man.

That is some satanic Wiccan crap.

I got to get some eyes out here.

All of these infrared cameras are motion activated

and will cut right into the feed automatically.

So if anything happens out here, we'll know.

Let's see.

Not a big fan of barbed wire or "bobbed" wire,

as my mom calls it.

There's got to be another door.

Yeah. This is better.

Good thing I've been lifting.

Being banned from the Internet has given me

time to work on my self.

Ah!

Okay.

Spiders!

Ah!

Okay. Before I change my mind...

This is also called protecting me from myself.

What is that, a vent?

After Mildred's death, 11 more people died in this house

before it was finally boarded up in 1956.

That's... Shit! Shoot!

I meant shoot. Please don't monetize me, Livvid.

This is an intense situation.

I think there should be a strike system,

like three strikes or something, starting on the next one.

Holy F.

This room smells like my A.H.

"Help me."

It's just paint. It's just paint.

Is anyone else creeped out by this?

"I'm an atheist. I don't believe in ghosts."

Oh, good for you, Kimbucha.

"Haunted houses are overdone."

How can haunted houses be overdone?

I've never done one before.

Kiguy5... "Did kids call you crater face in high school?"

No, because in high school it was still acne.

Your nuts. Yeah. What about him?

What is that?

Oh, gross! Oh, gross!

That's disgusting.

Alright, Shawn, 10 minutes in,

you've already got swearing and drugs.

Is that a well bucket?

I feel like I'm in "The Ring."

Here it is.

Mildred's old kitchen.

That means that's the room.

Okay.

Judas Priest! Look at that thing.

Looks like it could fillet someone.

Okay.

Tonight, we're going to be monitoring three rooms,

all of which have actual documented paranormal activity.

The first room, the master bedroom.

Ahh.

We got to get a camera up in here, too.

Internet, say a prayer this chair doesn't break.

Is that gonna hold?

Pro tip... Always carry duct tape.

You can literally fix 90% of life's problems with duct tape.

I made a wallet of duct tape in eighth grade.

I'm still proud of it.

Master.

Okay, this room has two separate reports of the same ghost

who I like to call Corner Man.

This is the first account.

In 1910, a man named Max Loland wrote about a reoccurring dream

he had while sleeping in this room.

"In my dreams, I wake up and see a very tall man

in the north corner of my room.

I can't see his face, but I know he's watching me.

And he always whispers the same thing...

The pond water still.

One year later, Max Loland died in his sleep.

In this room.

Probably in this nasty bed.

North corner.

Okay, prepare yourself. This is really disturbing.

"In 1995, a team of paranormal investigators

came into this room and took this picture.

They were standing right here.

I don't think I can be in here anymore.

I hope you all appreciate the public service

I'm doing by being here.

LilyKing98... "Shawn, please do the right thing

and help the spirits of this house find rest."

Hell, no! I'm not an exorcist, LilyKing98.

Oyaboyo... "Are you still with what's her name?"

No, shh! We're here.

That's where it happened.

Mildred hung herself right at the top of these stairs.

From all accounts I could dig up,

Mildred's small town community wasn't a big fan of, quote,

"odd duck Mildred and her weird poems."

So her dad built her this big house.

I don't know why.

My guess is he thought it might attract

a husband for her.

But no one wanted her it seems.

As creepy as the Corner Man stuff is,

it's the second floor that's the real

paranormal G-spot in this house.

Okay.

The nursery.

From what I found in my research, five children

have died in this room.

Two babies and three kids.

Oh. I've always hated creepy kid movies.

What if Haley Joel Osment was just sitting here?

As an adult.

Oh, that's worse.

Look at that window.

Why isn't this one boarded up?

You think something escaped?

Okay, now, for the ghost evidence of this room.

I'm going to play this messed up video from some ghost hunters

in the '90s while I set up the room cam.

-I don't want to go back in there, Dad.

-Just a little longer, just to help us out.

-No.

-Well, we can get ice cream after.

Jessica!

They told me it's not my room.

-Who told you that?

Pretty creepy, right?

That girl totally saw something in this room.

Also, I just want to say, I do not condone

the use of a child in paranormal research.

I've never used children before in my stunts.

Despite what people say, there are further depths

that I could sink to.

Okay. Last room.

This is the room I've been dreading the most.

The bathroom.

A mirror!

Bloody Mary.

The last death that I could find happened

in this bathtub in 1955.

Ohhhh.

Ah!

I would never.

I'm about to play an EVP recorded in this room in 2002.

For those of you unfamiliar with EVPs,

EVP stands for Electronic Voice Phenomenon.

The idea is that recordings may be able to

pick up communications from the dead

that we otherwise can't hear.

I'll show you. Listen to this.

-We've got Jay. He's going to man the recorder.

He's been feeling really sick.

-Yeah, I just... I don't. I don't like it here.

The second we walked in, I just... I don't like it.

Yeah, I just... I don't know. I don't like it here.

The second we walked in, I just... I don't like it.

I don't like it.

I don't like it. I don't like it.

-Did you guys hear that?

The ghost said "mama" and "pond water."

It's just like that guy's journal.

Corner Ghost said the pond water is still.

It was totally pond water!

Okay, fine. Maybe it was "bond mother."

Either way, there's a presence still in this bath.

Why is it still here?

Well, that brings us back to our story of pathetic,

lonely Mildred and her sad poems.

Mildred lived here for eight years in this house,

writing poems about the romantic love

she didn't have.

A tortured artist, you could say.

But she was finally hit with a stroke of luck

when a handsome, wealthy publisher

from the East Coast named Lars Jorgensen

passed through her small town.

They fell in love, and for two years,

they wrote each other love letters almost every day.

Want to know what happens next?

You're going to have to stay tuned.

All right. For whatever reason,

this room hasn't had any reports of paranormal activity.

Which is why I'm calling this the safe room

and setting up my home base.

This room is now "Wrath of Shawn" headquarters.

A closet!

Oh, no. Ghosts love closets.

I have to check.

Okay. We're clear.

What is that?

What is this?!

I do not like this!

If something happens to me tonight,

I guarantee it'll be because of this thing.

Okay, let's get some proper light in here, shall we?

I think I deserve that.

If you're just tuning in,

I have just finished my setup of the house.

Ah.

Ahh.

I better just go halfsies on this thing.

I'm not as young as I used to be.

No offense, Thunder.

I mean, I know it says 100% natural ingredients,

so I'm sure it's good for you.

If you're 18.

SleeplesslnSerbia... For the love of God,

tell us what happened to Mildred.

No, I got to keep you guys watching all night.

TatumTot... provoke the spirits.

I am provoking them. By being here.

Seriously I'm out? No, no, no, no, no.

Wait, wait, wait, don't go, don't go.

I'll provoke.

And yes, I did make a wheel of stupid things for this.

Let me get it.

Right. See? All right, I'll spin.

Oh, seance? Come on.

Okay, but I get to choose the room.

We're going to do things my way. All right?

Okay, back to the shocking conclusion

of the Mildred saga.

After writing each other letters for two years,

Lars asked Mildred to marry him and move to Boston.

She was finally about to leave

what she called "this stinky little town."

But just two days before she was supposed to move,

Lars unexpectedly died.

She hung herself the next day at the end of this hall.

And legend has it that everyone who died after her

is still in this house.

Why?

Because Mildred is collecting souls to create the family

she could never have in life.

Oh, no way!

Oh, this is too perfect!

Oh, somebody look this up and find a year on this thing.

And the going price on eBay.

Should I be offended that clowns wear whiteface?

I'm always out of touch with the rules on these things.

Spirit from another time,

I touch something

that was once thine.

Come to me. I summoned thee.

Red rover, red rover, send dead babies right over.

Geez.

I'm not sure how you're supposed to tell the difference

between old house sounds and ghost sounds.

Ghosts have a really...

Did you guys hear that? It's... aah!

It's coming after me.

That was not a house sound. That was a thump!

What kind of a house goes thump?

Here's the thing.

I was too scared to say it back there, but...

I felt something, like... like a vibration in my chest.

Like... it felt like.

You believed me.

I'm thinking about producing a film starring me.

You know, I actually think I'm good enough.

I'm going to call it "The Excor-Shawnce"

or "Shawn-corcist."

Speaking of cysts, I used to date this girl

that had a cyst in her forearm.

I mean, it wasn't huge, but it still gave me the heebies.

Now my memories have exaggerated over time.

So every time I think about her,

I imagine this Popeye arm looking girl.

Makes me want to throw up.

We should look her up!

How freaky would it be if we did an episode

where we drain her cyst?

You gag, you lose challenge.

Can't even think about it.

Oh, come on. That doesn't even look real.

I'm not falling for this Photoshop hack job.

I've been using Photoshop since eighth grade.

Okay. All right, I'll play.

Let's pull up that part of the time code.

Let's go there.

That was real. That was real.

What do we do?

I'm not going back out there. That was right outside the door.

Screw the rules. That wasn't a ghost sound.

That was a literal, actual thing.

Like a demon or Slenderman or something.

You all saw it. It had freaking legs!

Damn it.

Stop. Stop. I'm not losing my sponsors again.

Just... Just let me think.

Okay, so... so technically, I just have to go to that spot

and I could run right back, right?

I just need to walk to the end of the hallway

and come right back.

There and back again.

Like "A Hobbit's Tale." Okay, I can do this.

I can do this. Oh, shit, I can't do it!

Come on, Shawn, you can. The sponsors.

Okay.

All right.

All right, here I go. Watch me soar.

Okay, I'm going, but I need some support.

Like, can you send me pictures of cute things like baby pandas

or dogs wearing clothes and shit.

Shoot. Strike.

Did I leave that open?

Come on, Shawn. You can do this.

What was that?

It's real! It's real! It's real!

What do you want from me?!

-Oh, my God!

Oh, my God.

Shawn! I love you so much.

I can't believe it's you!

I'm obsessed with watching you.

I mean, watching your channel.

-How did you find me? You're not supposed to be here.

Oh, it's so good to see a human.

- Can I stay? - Yes, please.

No!

Oh, please don't leave me.

Who are you? - I'm Chrissy.

You've probably seen, like, a bazillion comments from me.

I'm QuizCat94.

-Holy crap. Can I just sit down for a second

and process all of this?

-Of course.

Oh, I'm fine.

-How did you even figure out where this place is?

-Oh, it wasn't hard. I just pieced things together.

You accidently gave it away when you were said...

-Whoa, whoa, whoa. Stop, stop.

I don't want any more surprise visitors tonight.

So you drove out to the middle of nowhere

and then an hour down a sketchy dirt road

in the middle of the night all by yourself just to...

-I just wanted to say hi in person.

Also, I can help with the ghost hunting.

I'm really good at stuff like that.

-Well, obviously I don't need help ghost hunting.

I'm pretty good at drawing them out all by myself apparently.

I'm like a frickin' salt lick for ghosts.

- Wait, are you leaving? - Huh?

I think I'm just going to leave my cameras.

-Why? I thought you needed the money.

-You can't pay me enough to stay here.

-Even with the record amount of views.

-Serious?

Oh.

Holy crap!

-See, Shawn. They want us to stay.

-Chrissy, not trying to be an A-hole or anything,

but they don't want us to stay, they want me to stay.

The whole premise here is that I'm alone in a haunted house.

Seriously? You want her to stay? Okay.

All right. I'll make a poll. Should she stay?

You seriously want her to stay?

It's not going to be as scary with two people here.

-Shawn, are we staying?

-The engagement is really high with you here.

Oh, this is so stupid.

All right, let me think about this.

Okay. We'll stay.

Yes! Yes!

-Hey, sponsors, I just want to say,

I know this is technically outside of our agreement,

but you saw that I didn't do this.

She came on her own. Okay?

-He's telling the truth. I have never met him.

-Okay.

We've got a ghost to investigate.

Here. Take this.

-It's Chrissy.

-All right.

All right, let's hurry before I think it through.

I can't believe I'm coming out here again.

Hey, turn around. Look that way.

Turn. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Walk backwards like that.

I got eyes in the back of my head now.

-I think we should go to the master bedroom.

-No, I don't want to go down there.

-That's where Corner Man lives. Isn't that who you saw?

-Okay, fine. We'll go to his room.

-Do I still need to walk backwards?

-Yes, but look up so we can actually see.

-Okay.

-Better.

-Hey, Shawn.

I think people would really like it

if you acted a little more excited about this.

-Are you fan-splaining to me right now?

I know what I'm doing.

There it is. That's his room.

Some people legit died in there.

Chrissy!

Seriously?

Chrissy!

Chrissy, what the hell are you doing?

I'm serious!

You scared me. What are you doing?

-Sorry. Just hunting for ghosts.

-Okay. Well, new rule.

We're not going to split up, ever. Okay?

Okay. Everything seems calm in there right now.

Hey, to go over there. That's his space.

You're disrespecting it.

I heard something.

-I'm gonna kill her.

Before this night is over, I'm gonna kill Christy.

What is it?

I'm good at checking out closets.

This sounds like mice.

Whoa!

That goes way back there.

Stairs!

-Let me see.

A secret room. Let's go down there.

-That would be so stupid.

Why do you think they covered this up?

- Maybe they thought... - Shh!

Oh, smells like a dead feet in here.

This looks like an old cellar.

Shawn!

-Oh, wow.

What is that?

It's locked. There's probably money in here.

Do you think some of this is Mildred's stuff?

-I don't know.

What's that?

What is this?

Mildred Pratt?

This must be her journal!

Are we about to uncover the secret of this house?

"The dianthus are blooming. The birds are cooing.

Your visage is in the sunlit canopies."

Oh, never mind. These are just poems.

-That's so cool. Read another one.

-They don't even rhyme.

-What? Let me see.

-What is that?

What is that?!

That is a dead animal!

That is a dead,

mummified animal!

-No!

-A secret room with Mildred's stuff.

Do the wheel, please. Yes. Yes. Let's do the wheel!

I'm actually excited this time. Let's do it.

Here, Chrissy. You can spin it.

It's on the line. Spin again.

-No, Shawn. It's not an accident.

Something wants us to do both.

-Spirit board.

AVP reporter.

-Candles?

-I don't have candles.

I have these.

-To start, I'll need you to read the poems out loud.

-No, they're boring.

- They're not boring. - Chrissy, this is my show.

Put one of your hands on this book.

Spirits of this house.

We want to talk to the child spirits of this house.

Not to slendery thing. Please.

I'm now turning the floor over to Chrissy.

You got this.

-How are you, my spiritual children?

-Listen.

Were any of you killed by the spirit named Mildred?

-Shawn, I know a chant that always works.

Repeat after me.

-No, I don't say weird things I don't understand.

-Okay, I don't know, like, the literal translation.

But basically it's an offering of peace to those

who may not be at peace.

Like, maybe the spirit wasn't satisfied.

Like, maybe they wanted more out of life.

-Okay. Fine.

-Okay. Repeat after me.

-What was that?

The motion sensors must have picked up something

in the bathroom.

- Let's go check it out. - No!

-You have to check out the paranormal activity, Shawn.

You made up the rules.

-That's what we're doing right now.

We're checking out the ghost in this room.

If there's another ghost when we're checking out a ghost,

it gets canceled out.

- "Chrissy's braver than you." Stop it.

She's not braver than me.

She's just trying to get out of our board game

because she's obviously losing.

- "Your rules, Shawn."

Oh, give me a freaking break, guys.

I thought you were Wrathies.

Okay, just give me a minute to think about this.

-Don't worry, Shawn.

I have a feeling that soon you won't be afraid anymore.

-Thank you for that.

What if Chrissy goes?

-Sure. I guess.

But you said we shouldn't separate ever.

-But then I realized we should.

Guys, guys, whoa, whoa.

I'm not making her go check it out by herself.

She's a strong, independent woman,

and she's choosing to go alone, right?

It's actually better this way because I can look at

the monitors and let you know if something's happening.

What was that?

Did that just move?

Oh, crap.

Chrissy?

Screw this room.

Chrissy?

Chrissy?

Chrissy!

Chrissy!

Chrissy?

Ah!

Stupid... big little lies.

What the "F" is wrong with you?

-You are so jumpy.

-Because there are literal actual ghost things

happening to me right now, and you're up here

pissing around like you don't care about any of it,

and you're trying to turn my fans against me.

- Shawn, it's just a joke. - No, it's not.

Where did you even go?

-Just hiding.

-Where, Chrissy? You disappear so fast.

How do you even know where to hide?

Have you been here before?

Did you get here before I did?

-No, Shawn.

-Then how did you get in? I locked the door.

- I went through a window. - Bullshit!

You're not a huge fan. You're a crazy stalker freak.

This whole thing has turned into me baby sitting a freak.

Meanwhile, I got 100% legit demons or ghosts after me.

You are officially uninvited.

Now I'm going to go back in the safe room by myself

and Google how to exorcise ghost children.

-I don't think that's a good idea.

-Why not?

Oh, shit.

Oh, shit.

Oh, shit.

Oh, shit. I killed her.

I killed her.

I need the cops. I need the cops.

Help!

There's been an accident! I killed someone!

Somebody call the cops!

I'm at the old Pratt house about 20 miles down

McGreedy Road.

I'm gonna drive into town and turn myself in.

I'm so sorry! It was an accident!

Chrissy?

Chrissy?

Chrissy?

I'm going to leave a first aid kit right here for you.

What the hell was that?!

What is that?

It's her.

It's her.

It's Mildred.

Did you guys see that?

"You have to leave." I can't leave!

She's blocking the stairs.

I'm gonna die.

What video?

-Shawn, you know that thing that was hanging in the closet?

Well, I figured out what it was. A symbol is a hamsa.

It's hard to identify because it's an ancient version.

But if you look at these shapes, you can see.

These are the fingers, and this is the eyes.

- This kid's like 12 years old. - I don't know if you know

very much about hamsas, but it's a symbol

that is used to ward off evil.

Everybody uses it...

The Jews, Muslims, Christians, Pagans.

There's a whole thing on Wikipedia about it,

but I'm pretty sure that the people that made it were

trying to keep the evil spirits of the house at bay.

And my guess is it was probably working until you destroyed it.

- What? - I'm sorry, Shawn,

but I just wanted to say I'm a big fan,

and I think you're really funny, and the world

should just forgive you because you're a good person

and everybody's too sensitive these days.

-I unleased her.

I unleashed Mildred.

Somebody help me!

"Push past her..."

I can't! I can't!

Come on, Shawn.

"If she had the power to attack you, she would have done it."

Okay, okay.

I'm gonna go try to squeeze past her.

Yes. Yes

That's not my key.

Oh, shit, oh, shit.

Ah!

Where are the cops? I need help. I can't get out.

"Maybe you're supposed to use the key to open the box."

How's that supposed to help?

It fits.

Chrissy is Mildred!

I can't just jump out a window.

This is crazy. No way am I going back upstairs.

-They're not going to let me out of this house!

I can't leave. I've just gonna wait for the cops.

What do you mean she owns me?

-Shawn, I'm a Latin professor at Brown University.

I've translated the Latin that you spoke early in the night

when you tried to talk to the dead.

Shawn, that woman lied to you.

- What? - This is the actual translation

of what you said.

I give thee my soul and forfeit my will.

- Oh, no. - I'm sorry, Shawn.

-Can I help?

Shawn, we have a theory about what's been happening

at the house.

We think that every ghost lives there used to be alive,

like you, Mildred totally messes with people's minds

and tries to make them depressed and psycho

and not themselves until eventually she gets them

to say the chant that you said you said.

So, Shawn, now that you said the words, I'm afraid that

you might feel like killing yourself.

- That's enough. - Don't die, Shawn.

-Oh, no.

I'm not going to kill myself!

Karma for what I did?

I didn't do anything wrong.

I apologized because I had to.

I lost everything. My parents got death threats.

I was acquitted, by the way. No one ever mentions that.

I never said I was a role model!

I'm sick of apologizing for being myself!

I regret apologizing, and that's the only thing I regret!

I didn't know he was sick!

He signed a waiver!

I'm not racist! - Shawn.

What was that?

-Guilty!

Ouch.

Ah! Ow, my legs!

Oh, I can't look.

I can't look.

Okay. I'll look.

I shouldn't have looked!

Where are the cops?!

Clean it?

Okay.

Oh, no.

Spark plugs.

Spark plugs.

Yes!

Oh. Yes, yes. Yes.

Ah!

-Are you Shawn Ruddy?

-Yes.

Oh, you're my freakin' hero, man!

- Okay, son. - You're never gonna hear me

say another bad thing about the police, I swear.

-Okay. I'm just happy to help.

-We have to get out of here fast.

Where's your car? I don't see your car, man.

-I've been watching tonight. It's some really great stuff.

-What?

-But I really don't like it when you hurt people, Shawn.

-No, no, no.

-You really shouldn't hurt people, Shawn.

-Is that what this is about?

I would never hurt anyone on purpose!

Except for you, mother frogger!

Bitch!

Strike. Ah!

I can't see.

Yes.

Oh, no! Ah!

Ah!

Help me! They're coming to get me!

I can't go back out there. You saw what was in the woods.

Hamsa lady? Who's hamsa lady?

-Grandma were talking to that guy I told you about.

He's in the house right now. Tell him who you are.

-My name is Hedy.

When I was 15 years old,

I lived in the Pratt house as a nanny.

-No way! She lived here?

-There's a vengeful spirit in the house named Mildred.

She came after me, but I created a ward

to keep her powers at bay.

It's in upstairs closet.

-He destroyed the house, Grandma.

-Aw, shit. He's going to die.

Can you tell him how to make

a new hamsa? - Yes!

Tell me how to put it back.

Oh, crap! Ah! Hurry.

-She sold her soul to the devil.

That's why she has so much power.

-Talk faster.

And that's why your hamsa

must be equally powerful.

-Ah! He's coming! Ah!

-Let this be an important lesson.

The devil always betrays you.

-Come on. Just tell me how to do it!

-First, you must remember that all worthwhile counter vigils

require a sacrifice of flesh.

Aaaah!

Oh, God. I need a weapon.

Potato gun.

Potatoes.

Come on!

Come on.

-Aaah!

Yes.

Shawn! Shawn! Shawn!

No, no, no, no, no!

Ah! Ah! No! Ah!

No! Ah! No, no!

Aaah! Aah!

Did you see that, Internet?

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

No!

Somebody help! I'm dying!

I don't even know if I'm still streaming.

This is not the way I imagined going out!

I was supposed to repair my image.

I don't want to be remembered as a douchebag.

Freaking Mildred! She's such a C.

Maybe this is karma. Is God smiting me?

I'm sorry. Okay?

I'm sorry.

No one can even hear me.

Need to leave a note.

"Unholy hand of power"?

"Influence others with the power of your word."

This looks like some kind of ritual.

This must be what she did to sell her soul.

Who knew this was actually a thing?

Maybe there's something else.

"Nothing changes. I am still, still, still.

I am like the pond water. The pond water is still!"

Pond water! That's what the ghosts keep repeating.

She's forcing them to memorize her poetry.

What a freaking weirdo.

She's like me. She wants an audience.

She kept trying to get me to read her poems.

And her fiancé was a publisher.

She's not creating a family.

She's building a following.

And I bet the more souls she collects,

the more powerful she becomes.

And what can hurt someone like me?

Copy strike, a copy strike!

Remember when I did that sewer surfing video,

and I started singing "Surfin USA"?

Well, the Beach Boys record label put a copy strike

on it and claimed all my money for that video.

What if I put a copy strike on Mildred? Forget the hamsa.

If I can do this same unholy hand ritual that she did,

I can claim her revenue, her power source.

Are you following? I can get my soul back!

This looks like a Latin.

Internet, please translate these words for me.

I'm going to need these words by the time I get to my laptop.

Let's de-monetize this bitch.

Hey, Mildred!

Believe me when I say I understand

why you do what you do.

But in the words of my manager,

you've taken things too far.

Way too far.

I'm still streaming!

Can you guys hear me?

You translated the words. Thank you.

Death becomes unholy with the power of my...

Oh, crap.

Thank you so much, Internet.

Wrathies, I don't have a lot of time,

but I think it's probably pretty obvious

to everyone that I'm not going to make it out of here alive.

And I just wanted to thank you for helping me

and supporting me.

The truth is I think I've known for a while

that I've been crossing a line.

I wish I could go back and change some stuff, but I can't.

And so I wanted to apologize, but for realsies this time.

I'm sorry to everyone I've hurt with my stunts.

It was wrong of me to pay a homeless man

to fight me for a video.

He seemed so much bigger than me, and I didn't think

I could actually hurt him.

But I apologize for hurting him.

But what I didn't apologize for

was for thinking of it in the first place.

And also, I want to apologize to the minorities.

A lot of you thought that I was making light

of a serious situation

when I got smuggled across the border.

That wasn't funny.

I mean, it was, but for the wrong reasons.

And I'm sorry.

I have been racially and culturally insensitive.

But I've learned, and I've grown.

In fact, I'd like to dedicate this broadcast

to the Blacks and Mexicans.

This is for you.

This is Shawn Ruddy promising you the most

cinematic experience in live streaming.

Mildred! I'm waiting!

My soul is waiting!

Fine.

"Echo my heart. Echo my soul. Bring my voice... "

"Blackbirds roam, their voices moan."

I mean, some of these are pretty good.

Not.

Hey, little guy.

I'm not gonna hurt you.

I think we can both agree that mommy's

a little bit nuts, right?

I was thinking maybe we could join f...

Ah!

-Shawn!

You're going to face me yourself or just send your child army

after me like a frickin' PewDiePie?

-Shawny. Come get me.

-You come get me!

- You come get me. - Opposite!

I'll find you in the hallway cam.

What the hell is that?

Ah!

Corner Man, I saw you!

Ah!

I got you, you lazy...

Okay. Wait, wait, wait. Wait, no!

Garlic!

Garlic is bullshit!

Ah!

-Shawn?

Shawn, I'm scared.

Help me, please. You hurt me real bad.

-That's not gonna work, Mildred.

Oh, shit.

Mildred!

Maybe I can help. I have the Internet.

There's a lot of nice people on the Internet that like to help.

No, no, no, no, no.

No.

Come on. Turn on.

Turn on!

-Shawn.

I want you to meet someone.

What?!

Help!

This feels so good.

Hey.

No way.

Mm.

Mm-hmm.

No! Mildred!

The pond water is still.

Mildred, no! No!

No, Mildred!

I am the influencer!

Ah!

Aaaah!

Garlic may not work on ghosts.

But if there's one thing the movies have taught me,

it's that holy water will f...

I'm gonna kill her.

Again.

Watch your hands! Gotcha!

No! - Smash it!

Shawn.

Aaah!

Okay.

-Surprise, bitch!

Goodbye, Mildred.

I hope you enjoy hell.

Death becomes unholy with the power of my unholy hand.

I use the power of my will,

my words, my passion, my ambition,

and my authority to take the souls

of this house and bind them to me!

Wait, wait. No, no, no. Wait, wait, wait.

Why?! No!

No!

No!

-Bad Shawny.

-I don't understand what happened.

I said the words.

-I'm coming to get...

-Ow.

What does she want?

It's over.

-Subscribe.

-Goodbye, Internet.

I'm sorry I let you down.

-That's that nasty finger.

What is it with Mildred and fingers?

-A sacrifice of flesh.

That old lady said that the cult rituals

require a sacrifice of flesh.

That's Mildred's finger.

Hey, Millie!

I'm about to put a ripple in your pond water.

Death becomes unholy with the power of my unholy hand.

I use the power of my will, my words, my passion,

my ambition, and my authority!

To take the souls of this house...

And bind them...

to me!

I did it!

Oh.

I did it.

No, we did it!

We beat this house!

I just want to take a minute and think all of my fans.

I'm getting a little emosh.

We beat this house, you guys!

Suck on that, Huffington Post!

Ow!

Oh, my leg is definitely broken.

I told you!

No one off you a more cinematic experience in live streaming.

I, Shawn Ruddy, am once again

the number one live streamer in...

No!