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1
00:00:01.919 --> 00:00:03.296
- Please make sure
your seatbelt is fastened.
2
00:00:03.320 --> 00:00:04.464
We ask that you keep
your seatbelt fastened
3
00:00:04.488 --> 00:00:06.288
while seated in case
we encounter
4
00:00:06.323 --> 00:00:07.443
some unexpected turbulence.
5
00:00:10.361 --> 00:00:12.227
- Excuse me.
Excuse me.
6
00:00:12.263 --> 00:00:13.263
Hey.
7
00:00:15.433 --> 00:00:17.232
You've lit the spark.
Might as well keep
8
00:00:17.268 --> 00:00:20.335
the fire burning.
- Ma'am, I've just served you.
9
00:00:20.371 --> 00:00:22.315
- I don't need anything
complicated... just another
10
00:00:22.339 --> 00:00:24.406
one of these teeny tiny
bottles of bourbon... two.
11
00:00:24.442 --> 00:00:27.476
Mm... three?
12
00:00:27.545 --> 00:00:30.379
- I'll catch you
on the way back.
13
00:00:41.292 --> 00:00:43.225
- I used to be afraid
of flying.
14
00:00:43.260 --> 00:00:45.360
I couldn't help but think
of how this big metal tube
15
00:00:45.396 --> 00:00:47.496
was probably gonna crash
right back to Earth.
16
00:00:47.531 --> 00:00:50.399
I still think about
how the plane might crash.
17
00:00:50.434 --> 00:00:52.534
In fact, this one
actually will,
18
00:00:52.570 --> 00:00:55.304
and I just don't care anymore.
19
00:00:55.339 --> 00:00:58.507
My name's Allison Pyke...
At least, that's my name now.
20
00:00:58.542 --> 00:01:01.310
And I'm already dead, so
I could crash all the damn day,
21
00:01:01.345 --> 00:01:03.212
and I don't care at all.
22
00:01:07.384 --> 00:01:09.418
♪
23
00:01:09.453 --> 00:01:11.420
There's a gremlin on the wing.
24
00:01:11.455 --> 00:01:14.256
Kidding.
The engine's on fire.
25
00:01:16.360 --> 00:01:18.227
- This is your captain
speaking.
26
00:01:18.262 --> 00:01:20.229
We're having some
slight engine trouble,
27
00:01:20.264 --> 00:01:22.364
and we'll be returning
to the airport shortly.
28
00:01:22.399 --> 00:01:24.266
- What's happening?
- I don't know.
29
00:01:24.301 --> 00:01:26.235
- Baby.
Baby, can you hear me?
30
00:01:26.270 --> 00:01:28.437
Are you there?
Hello?
31
00:01:28.472 --> 00:01:31.473
- Hey, any luck
on that bourbon?
32
00:01:31.509 --> 00:01:33.408
I'm an angel now.
33
00:01:33.444 --> 00:01:35.444
Yup, seriously.
34
00:01:35.479 --> 00:01:37.412
But being an angel
isn't a reward.
35
00:01:37.448 --> 00:01:39.314
It's a punishment.
36
00:01:39.350 --> 00:01:40.360
Like, when you're an all-around
great person,
37
00:01:40.384 --> 00:01:42.284
you die, you go up there.
38
00:01:42.319 --> 00:01:44.264
When you're like a B, B-minus
person, you become an angel
39
00:01:44.288 --> 00:01:45.454
and get a sentence on Earth,
40
00:01:45.489 --> 00:01:47.489
and that sentence
is a number of points,
41
00:01:47.525 --> 00:01:49.491
and you get points
when you perform a miracle.
42
00:01:49.527 --> 00:01:52.261
It's a little like
a prison with time off
43
00:01:52.296 --> 00:01:53.428
for good behavior.
44
00:01:53.464 --> 00:01:55.297
You know,
but it could be worse.
45
00:01:55.332 --> 00:01:57.399
I never flew first class
when I was alive.
46
00:01:57.434 --> 00:01:59.501
Hell, I never got
out of Nebraska.
47
00:02:01.472 --> 00:02:03.383
The second I'm old enough,
I'm getting the hell out
48
00:02:03.407 --> 00:02:06.441
of Nebraska.
- What's better than Nebraska?
49
00:02:06.477 --> 00:02:08.443
- This is my best friend,
Patrick.
50
00:02:08.479 --> 00:02:10.279
New York.
51
00:02:10.314 --> 00:02:12.414
And this is me.
Yep, I used to be
52
00:02:12.449 --> 00:02:14.449
a white girl with a uni-brow.
53
00:02:14.485 --> 00:02:16.329
- I'd like to go to New York
and see the giant piano
54
00:02:16.353 --> 00:02:18.253
from "Big."
- Fine.
55
00:02:18.289 --> 00:02:21.390
Come.
Here. Open it.
56
00:02:21.425 --> 00:02:24.493
- ♪ That our love
was all wrong ♪
57
00:02:24.528 --> 00:02:28.163
- Wow.
This is a truly terrible gift.
58
00:02:28.199 --> 00:02:29.431
Something worse for you.
59
00:02:29.466 --> 00:02:31.266
♪
60
00:02:31.302 --> 00:02:33.402
- ♪ This Christmas
- Wow!
61
00:02:33.437 --> 00:02:34.481
These are the kind
truckers pee in.
62
00:02:34.505 --> 00:02:35.705
I'm gonna go see if they work.
63
00:02:37.575 --> 00:02:40.442
- So I was a weird white girl
with a uni-brow,
64
00:02:40.477 --> 00:02:42.556
and somehow, I had no idea
Patrick had a major crush
65
00:02:42.580 --> 00:02:44.546
on me... until a few
Christmases later.
66
00:02:46.584 --> 00:02:48.517
I'm sorry I'm late.
67
00:02:48.552 --> 00:02:51.520
It's a commemorative
porcelain plate
68
00:02:51.555 --> 00:02:53.455
featuring the portraits
of the members
69
00:02:53.490 --> 00:02:54.423
of the Red Hot Chili Peppers.
70
00:02:54.458 --> 00:02:56.425
♪
71
00:02:56.460 --> 00:02:57.526
- Can I kiss you?
72
00:03:00.164 --> 00:03:02.264
- In case you were wondering,
he got me a pair
73
00:03:02.299 --> 00:03:04.444
of talking parrot earrings
and a case of iguana food.
74
00:03:04.468 --> 00:03:07.402
I found my soul mate
when I was 15.
75
00:03:07.438 --> 00:03:09.371
We were excited to spend
76
00:03:09.406 --> 00:03:10.517
the rest of our lives
together,
77
00:03:10.541 --> 00:03:13.375
which turned out
to be way shorter for me
78
00:03:13.410 --> 00:03:16.378
than for Patrick.
79
00:03:16.413 --> 00:03:17.413
But back to our story.
80
00:03:17.448 --> 00:03:19.448
- We lost both the engines!
81
00:03:19.483 --> 00:03:22.451
We're gonna make
an emergency landing!
82
00:03:22.486 --> 00:03:24.319
- Here's a good travel tip:
83
00:03:24.355 --> 00:03:25.465
they don't charge
for sandwiches on flights
84
00:03:25.489 --> 00:03:29.157
if everyone thinks
they're gonna die.
85
00:03:29.193 --> 00:03:30.392
- I love you so much.
86
00:03:30.427 --> 00:03:32.461
I'll see you
in heaven, my angel.
87
00:03:32.496 --> 00:03:34.296
- If only it were that easy.
88
00:03:36.567 --> 00:03:39.468
Oh! Here we go.
- Brace for impact.
89
00:03:39.503 --> 00:03:41.370
- We're gonna die.
90
00:03:41.405 --> 00:03:42.537
- I wish.
91
00:03:45.542 --> 00:03:48.343
♪
92
00:03:48.379 --> 00:03:49.511
Hi, guys.
Sorry about this.
93
00:03:49.546 --> 00:03:52.481
I'm taking over.
94
00:03:52.516 --> 00:03:55.350
- It is truly a miracle
on the river.
95
00:03:55.386 --> 00:03:57.552
- The hero pilot who saved
hundreds of lives
96
00:03:57.588 --> 00:03:59.421
all by himself...
97
00:03:59.456 --> 00:04:01.390
- So I landed in the river.
Sue me.
98
00:04:01.425 --> 00:04:05.127
I'm not a professional pilot.
But they needed me.
99
00:04:05.162 --> 00:04:06.373
They needed someone
who could get things done
100
00:04:06.397 --> 00:04:09.164
and didn't care
if they lived or died...
101
00:04:09.199 --> 00:04:10.432
'cause you can't die twice.
102
00:04:21.178 --> 00:04:23.378
This was 2008,
right after I had died.
103
00:04:23.414 --> 00:04:25.480
40,000 down, 10,000 to go.
104
00:04:25.516 --> 00:04:27.449
I was on my way out
of here in no time.
105
00:04:29.520 --> 00:04:33.422
But since then, my miracles
have slowed down... a lot.
106
00:04:33.457 --> 00:04:35.357
- Excuse me.
- Excuse me.
107
00:04:35.392 --> 00:04:37.159
The sidewalk is not wide.
You move your feet
108
00:04:37.194 --> 00:04:38.538
to make it work.
One foot in front of the other.
109
00:04:38.562 --> 00:04:42.397
You've done it your whole life.
Oh!
110
00:04:42.433 --> 00:04:45.400
Here you are, sir.
111
00:04:45.436 --> 00:04:48.437
Two points?
What are these papers?
112
00:04:48.472 --> 00:04:50.405
Permits to demolish
an orphanage?
113
00:04:50.441 --> 00:04:52.374
- ♪ Red and yellow
114
00:04:52.409 --> 00:04:55.444
♪ And blue and green
- Ugh, come on.
115
00:04:55.479 --> 00:04:57.479
In the past nine years,
I've barely gained
116
00:04:57.514 --> 00:04:59.381
any points at all.
117
00:04:59.416 --> 00:05:01.216
Jason, my angel advisor,
thinks it's because
118
00:05:01.251 --> 00:05:03.352
I have a bad attitude.
Other angels call me
119
00:05:03.387 --> 00:05:04.497
a one-miracle wonder
behind my back.
120
00:05:04.521 --> 00:05:07.122
You know, but I say screw them.
121
00:05:07.157 --> 00:05:10.392
It's not my fault.
The Universe is against me.
122
00:05:10.427 --> 00:05:12.194
Screw the Universe too.
123
00:05:12.229 --> 00:05:13.440
- ♪ Christmas is
waiting for you ♪
124
00:05:13.464 --> 00:05:16.365
- And I just lost 15 points
for saying that.
125
00:05:16.400 --> 00:05:18.166
Who knew the Universe
was so sensitive?
126
00:05:18.202 --> 00:05:23.171
♪
127
00:05:23.207 --> 00:05:24.484
- I know it's a bummer you have
to work Christmas,
128
00:05:24.508 --> 00:05:27.242
but there's going to be big
tips, so, you know,
129
00:05:27.277 --> 00:05:28.377
there's that, okay?
130
00:05:34.184 --> 00:05:35.395
I don't ask for much.
131
00:05:35.419 --> 00:05:37.185
You know, just that
you start work on time.
132
00:05:37.221 --> 00:05:38.531
- Well, Connie, I told you,
with my schedule,
133
00:05:38.555 --> 00:05:41.356
I need a floating
15-minute window.
134
00:05:41.392 --> 00:05:43.358
- Yeah, but you're
two hours late.
135
00:05:43.394 --> 00:05:44.471
- Well, from my perspective,
136
00:05:44.495 --> 00:05:47.496
it's an hour 45.
137
00:05:47.531 --> 00:05:49.364
It's kind of a raw deal
being an angel.
138
00:05:49.400 --> 00:05:50.510
I mean, we're charged
with performing
139
00:05:50.534 --> 00:05:52.367
these important
miracles on earth,
140
00:05:52.403 --> 00:05:53.546
but we still need
food and shelter
141
00:05:53.570 --> 00:05:57.172
and all that crap, and so
we have to have jobs too.
142
00:05:57.207 --> 00:05:58.485
I mean, you'd think someone
in the afterlife
143
00:05:58.509 --> 00:06:00.409
could at least pay
my credit card bills.
144
00:06:00.444 --> 00:06:02.110
Ugh.
145
00:06:02.146 --> 00:06:03.445
This music is total garbage.
146
00:06:03.480 --> 00:06:05.447
Oh, my God,
147
00:06:05.482 --> 00:06:07.382
what are you doing?
I like that song.
148
00:06:07.418 --> 00:06:09.117
What are you,
Scrooge in skinny jeans?
149
00:06:09.153 --> 00:06:11.153
- They're just
all so stupid.
150
00:06:11.188 --> 00:06:12.365
And the worst one is
"12 Days of Christmas."
151
00:06:12.389 --> 00:06:14.489
- Well, I guess I'm
an idiot then,
152
00:06:14.525 --> 00:06:17.492
because my grandma and I would
sing it together every December
153
00:06:17.528 --> 00:06:19.372
up until she died,
and it's really the only thing
154
00:06:19.396 --> 00:06:22.230
that I have left of her.
- Okay, can we just start over?
155
00:06:22.266 --> 00:06:23.498
- Oh, sure.
How about you take
156
00:06:23.534 --> 00:06:25.412
that coffee pot, go over
to your favorite regulars,
157
00:06:25.436 --> 00:06:27.369
give them a little
coffee-coffee?
158
00:06:27.404 --> 00:06:31.206
- ♪ I don't wanna be
on my own tonight ♪
159
00:06:31.241 --> 00:06:33.175
- Hey.
How are you guys doing?
160
00:06:33.210 --> 00:06:35.143
- I like your shirt.
161
00:06:35.179 --> 00:06:37.479
- I never got attention
like this in my old body.
162
00:06:40.484 --> 00:06:47.456
♪
163
00:06:49.293 --> 00:06:50.492
Excuse me.
164
00:06:50.527 --> 00:06:52.461
Where am I?
165
00:07:01.171 --> 00:07:02.471
- Hi, Megan.
166
00:07:02.506 --> 00:07:04.339
- Yeah, that's me.
167
00:07:04.374 --> 00:07:07.242
Where the hell am I?
Am I...
168
00:07:09.413 --> 00:07:11.179
Dead.
169
00:07:11.215 --> 00:07:12.447
- Yes, dead.
You're very dead.
170
00:07:12.483 --> 00:07:14.216
Sorry.
Bummer.
171
00:07:14.251 --> 00:07:15.417
Now, if you will follow me,
172
00:07:15.452 --> 00:07:16.496
we have got
a lot of work to do.
173
00:07:16.520 --> 00:07:19.287
Gloria.
174
00:07:19.323 --> 00:07:21.156
- I recognize you, right?
175
00:07:21.191 --> 00:07:23.158
Did you go to school
with my uncle Don?
176
00:07:23.193 --> 00:07:24.259
- No.
177
00:07:24.294 --> 00:07:26.161
No, I'm, uh...
178
00:07:26.196 --> 00:07:28.296
I'm Jason Biggs.
179
00:07:28.332 --> 00:07:31.466
I did that big teen movie
in the late '90s.
180
00:07:31.502 --> 00:07:34.503
- It's not ringing any bells.
- Really?
181
00:07:34.538 --> 00:07:37.405
Okay, well, I did many
other movies.
182
00:07:37.441 --> 00:07:39.441
Also some TV shows...
183
00:07:39.476 --> 00:07:41.276
uh, Broadway...
A couple of times.
184
00:07:41.311 --> 00:07:44.446
Also off-Broadway.
Off-off-Broadway once, but...
185
00:07:44.481 --> 00:07:46.214
some modeling
when I was a kid.
186
00:07:46.250 --> 00:07:48.250
Nothing? Huh.
187
00:07:48.285 --> 00:07:51.253
I usually bat 1,000
with dead Americans 18 to 49.
188
00:07:51.288 --> 00:07:54.289
- And you died when I died?
- Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
189
00:07:54.324 --> 00:07:56.491
I died many years ago
at the ripe old age
190
00:07:56.527 --> 00:07:59.461
of 96 in Ukraine.
Yeah, I didn't start acting
191
00:07:59.496 --> 00:08:01.960
until I came back
to Earth as an angel.
192
00:08:01.131 --> 00:08:02.430
- You're an angel?
- Yeah.
193
00:08:02.466 --> 00:08:05.100
Most celebrities are
actually angels in disguise.
194
00:08:05.135 --> 00:08:06.412
Yeah, it, uh...
You know, it helps...
195
00:08:06.436 --> 00:08:08.336
Thanks, Brenda.
It helps with access
196
00:08:08.372 --> 00:08:12.174
and, you know, gets us
into places mortals cannot.
197
00:08:12.209 --> 00:08:15.110
Sign there and there.
Yep.
198
00:08:15.145 --> 00:08:16.478
Drake is an angel.
- Mm.
199
00:08:16.513 --> 00:08:19.147
Sandy... Bullock.
You know her?
200
00:08:19.183 --> 00:08:20.193
She's an angel.
She's a good one.
201
00:08:20.217 --> 00:08:21.449
RuPaul.
202
00:08:21.485 --> 00:08:24.452
- Ooh, is that a trial?
- Yep.
203
00:08:24.488 --> 00:08:26.421
That's angel court.
204
00:08:26.456 --> 00:08:27.422
- Like "Judge Judy"?
'Cause, you know,
205
00:08:27.457 --> 00:08:29.191
I always imagined God
206
00:08:29.226 --> 00:08:31.159
like an all-knowing Judge Judy.
207
00:08:31.195 --> 00:08:32.438
- It is nothing like
"Judge Judy."
208
00:08:32.462 --> 00:08:36.431
No, angel court is more
like "Judge Joe Brown."
209
00:08:36.466 --> 00:08:39.267
Mm-hmm.
Okeydokey,
210
00:08:39.303 --> 00:08:41.403
who's ready to get
their new body?
211
00:08:44.241 --> 00:08:46.408
That's a rhetorical question.
The answer is you.
212
00:08:46.443 --> 00:08:49.244
So after we die,
our souls change bodies.
213
00:08:49.279 --> 00:08:51.479
I got this one... lucky me...
And you're about
214
00:08:51.515 --> 00:08:53.481
to get a new one of your own.
215
00:08:53.517 --> 00:08:56.318
Just enter that changing room,
close the curtain,
216
00:08:56.353 --> 00:08:59.154
and press three random buttons.
217
00:08:59.189 --> 00:09:01.890
Now, I know you must have
a lot of questions
218
00:09:01.124 --> 00:09:03.169
about how it all works...
- I have a million questions.
219
00:09:03.193 --> 00:09:04.193
- But we don't have time.
220
00:09:04.228 --> 00:09:05.293
I'm being interviewed
221
00:09:05.329 --> 00:09:06.472
by Kelly Ripa in,
like, an hour,
222
00:09:06.496 --> 00:09:08.296
so, if you would...
223
00:09:08.332 --> 00:09:10.365
Yep, just...
224
00:09:10.400 --> 00:09:12.234
Uh-huh. Yeah.
225
00:09:12.269 --> 00:09:14.269
Seriously, it's, like,
in a half hour now.
226
00:09:17.307 --> 00:09:19.274
See the buttons?
- Yes.
227
00:09:19.309 --> 00:09:20.442
- Great.
Hit three of them.
228
00:09:24.514 --> 00:09:25.447
Great.
229
00:09:27.217 --> 00:09:28.483
Son of a...
230
00:09:28.518 --> 00:09:30.452
Oh, come on!
231
00:09:30.487 --> 00:09:34.122
I've asked the Universe, like,
a dozen times to fix this.
232
00:09:34.157 --> 00:09:35.390
Okay.
233
00:09:37.361 --> 00:09:40.295
Oh, God!
All right.
234
00:09:40.330 --> 00:09:42.163
Whoo!
235
00:09:42.199 --> 00:09:45.166
Unnecessary, you guys.
236
00:09:45.202 --> 00:09:47.269
All right, now...
237
00:09:47.304 --> 00:09:48.514
I'm just warning you,
you might be in
238
00:09:48.538 --> 00:09:50.171
for a bit of a shock.
239
00:09:50.207 --> 00:09:52.274
I knew someone
who went from a short,
240
00:09:52.309 --> 00:09:55.343
hunched, bald doctor in Kiev...
241
00:09:55.379 --> 00:09:57.245
to a New Jersey heartthrob.
242
00:09:59.216 --> 00:10:00.415
- Oh, my God.
243
00:10:03.220 --> 00:10:04.386
♪
244
00:10:06.456 --> 00:10:09.357
Man!
245
00:10:09.393 --> 00:10:11.426
How many sit-ups does
this girl do a day?
246
00:10:11.461 --> 00:10:13.295
- Well, this girl is you.
247
00:10:13.363 --> 00:10:15.397
How many sit-ups
do you do a day?
248
00:10:15.432 --> 00:10:19.200
- So... this is... heaven?
249
00:10:21.204 --> 00:10:23.438
No... oh, no, no, no.
No, Heaven...
250
00:10:23.473 --> 00:10:27.208
Heaven is right over there.
251
00:10:29.413 --> 00:10:32.447
- Heaven is... clouds?
252
00:10:32.482 --> 00:10:34.516
- It's behind the...
It's behind the clouds.
253
00:10:34.551 --> 00:10:36.518
- Well, I don't see anything.
254
00:10:36.553 --> 00:10:38.553
- I wasn't expecting it
to be so overcast.
255
00:10:38.588 --> 00:10:42.257
It's a little... little gray.
But it's there.
256
00:10:42.292 --> 00:10:46.561
Imagine a place with
no sadness, with no struggle,
257
00:10:46.596 --> 00:10:50.332
where everything
you could want...
258
00:10:50.367 --> 00:10:52.267
is right at your fingertips.
259
00:10:52.302 --> 00:10:53.368
Hmm?
260
00:10:53.403 --> 00:10:55.303
- So it's like Olive Garden.
261
00:10:55.339 --> 00:10:56.339
- What?
262
00:10:56.373 --> 00:10:58.573
- I'm ready.
263
00:10:58.608 --> 00:11:01.309
- You're cute.
No, we're not...
264
00:11:01.345 --> 00:11:03.378
You're not ready right now.
You're not... you're...
265
00:11:03.413 --> 00:11:05.380
You don't actually get
to go there... not yet.
266
00:11:05.415 --> 00:11:06.459
You know, you lived
a good life,
267
00:11:06.483 --> 00:11:08.450
but not that good.
268
00:11:08.485 --> 00:11:11.219
The Universe still thinks
you have some work to do.
269
00:11:11.254 --> 00:11:14.289
So... chop-chop.
270
00:11:16.426 --> 00:11:20.261
- So chop-chop I did, knocking
out miracles in New York City,
271
00:11:20.297 --> 00:11:23.198
but all work and no play
makes for a dull angel,
272
00:11:23.233 --> 00:11:25.467
so I found myself a playmate.
273
00:11:25.502 --> 00:11:28.236
Hey, sexy.
- You know what today is, Pyke?
274
00:11:28.271 --> 00:11:30.271
- Uh, Tuesday?
275
00:11:30.307 --> 00:11:32.240
- No, it's Saturday... the 23rd.
276
00:11:33.443 --> 00:11:34.409
I've been working
here for a year,
277
00:11:34.444 --> 00:11:36.211
which means...
278
00:11:36.246 --> 00:11:37.490
we've been
hanging out for a year.
279
00:11:37.514 --> 00:11:39.481
- Has it been a year?
280
00:11:39.516 --> 00:11:41.383
Happy sexual-versary.
281
00:11:41.418 --> 00:11:43.284
What is the official gift
for one year
282
00:11:43.320 --> 00:11:44.497
of emotion-free sex?
- Traditionally,
283
00:11:44.521 --> 00:11:46.287
it's a wink and a thumbs-up,
284
00:11:46.323 --> 00:11:47.367
but I went ahead
and broke convention...
285
00:11:47.391 --> 00:11:49.224
I got you a high five.
286
00:11:49.259 --> 00:11:51.259
- I got you the same thing.
287
00:11:51.294 --> 00:11:52.560
Now let's celebrate
with dinner.
288
00:11:52.596 --> 00:11:54.574
I'm free tomorrow night.
- Really? On Christmas Eve?
289
00:11:54.598 --> 00:11:57.198
That would be great, 'cause...
- Ooh, I have to cancel.
290
00:11:57.234 --> 00:11:58.533
Sorry, Barker.
291
00:11:58.568 --> 00:12:00.279
- That's kind of weird,
'cause you just said
292
00:12:00.303 --> 00:12:02.170
you were free, and...
- Yeah, I know,
293
00:12:02.205 --> 00:12:04.150
but Christmas Eve dinner feels
very couple-y, and...
294
00:12:04.174 --> 00:12:05.418
- Yeah.
- We're not a couple, so...
295
00:12:05.442 --> 00:12:07.175
best not to confuse things.
296
00:12:07.210 --> 00:12:08.243
- Got it.
Yeah.
297
00:12:08.278 --> 00:12:10.211
- ♪ Suzie wants a sleigh
298
00:12:10.247 --> 00:12:12.347
- Do you ever want
more from this?
299
00:12:12.382 --> 00:12:14.349
- I don't know, Barker.
Tell me.
300
00:12:14.384 --> 00:12:16.351
What more do you want from me?
301
00:12:16.386 --> 00:12:18.453
A quickie
in the storage closet?
302
00:12:18.488 --> 00:12:20.488
- Okay, I see
what you're doing here.
303
00:12:20.524 --> 00:12:24.259
You're trying to avoid
intimacy through sex,
304
00:12:24.294 --> 00:12:26.461
and I'm actually
at my job, so...
305
00:12:26.496 --> 00:12:29.397
Mm-hmm-hmm... mm-hmm...
306
00:12:29.433 --> 00:12:31.366
Oh! I have to go.
307
00:12:31.401 --> 00:12:33.201
- Weird, 'cause I was gonna
reject you anyway.
308
00:12:33.236 --> 00:12:35.370
You know, we're at work
during business hours.
309
00:12:35.405 --> 00:12:37.372
The last five times,
I swore...
310
00:12:37.407 --> 00:12:39.441
I would never do that again.
311
00:12:39.476 --> 00:12:41.320
- Connie, I need to take off
the rest of the day.
312
00:12:41.344 --> 00:12:42.488
- But that would imply
you worked some of the day.
313
00:12:42.512 --> 00:12:44.279
- Sorry, but it's
life or death.
314
00:12:44.314 --> 00:12:45.458
- Who's gonna die
if you finish your shift?
315
00:12:45.482 --> 00:12:47.282
- A guy at Madison and 22nd.
316
00:12:48.452 --> 00:12:51.186
♪
317
00:12:51.221 --> 00:12:52.487
- Excuse me.
318
00:12:52.522 --> 00:12:54.456
- Oh, come on, Leonard.
Let me have this one.
319
00:12:54.491 --> 00:12:56.324
- Ah, Heaven likes those
who hustle.
320
00:12:56.359 --> 00:12:59.294
Got to go!
321
00:12:59.329 --> 00:13:01.496
Sorry... coming up...
322
00:13:04.301 --> 00:13:07.435
All right, here we go.
323
00:13:07.471 --> 00:13:10.238
- Are-are...
Are you serious?
324
00:13:10.273 --> 00:13:12.173
That was, like,
200 feet, if that.
325
00:13:12.209 --> 00:13:14.175
- I haven't run in years.
I mean, no need to get
326
00:13:14.211 --> 00:13:15.488
into shape when your body just
always magically stays
327
00:13:15.512 --> 00:13:18.246
the same shape.
328
00:13:18.281 --> 00:13:19.380
- See, that's your problem.
329
00:13:19.416 --> 00:13:21.216
You don't take
this job seriously.
330
00:13:21.251 --> 00:13:22.361
You want to get up there,
you got to be ready
331
00:13:22.385 --> 00:13:23.529
for any miracle
that comes your way,
332
00:13:23.553 --> 00:13:25.220
and that means
you got to be strong.
333
00:13:25.255 --> 00:13:26.299
- Well, how's this for strong?
334
00:13:30.227 --> 00:13:31.526
Okay.
335
00:13:31.561 --> 00:13:34.329
Pyke, stop.
You're touching me.
336
00:13:34.364 --> 00:13:36.531
Look, you have
10,000 points to go.
337
00:13:36.566 --> 00:13:38.366
This isn't gonna make
a dent for you.
338
00:13:38.401 --> 00:13:40.268
I, on the other hand,
am almost back up there.
339
00:13:40.303 --> 00:13:42.215
Oh... all right, move out...
340
00:13:42.239 --> 00:13:43.349
- Leonard, dibs.
- Move out of my way.
341
00:13:47.277 --> 00:13:48.554
- It's all right.
You're safe now.
342
00:13:48.578 --> 00:13:50.411
Have a good day, sir.
343
00:13:56.453 --> 00:13:59.320
Did he just check his pockets
to see if I stole his wallet?
344
00:13:59.356 --> 00:14:02.223
- Yep.
- Tough out here,
345
00:14:02.259 --> 00:14:03.491
being a black angel.
- Mm-hmm.
346
00:14:03.527 --> 00:14:05.493
- ♪ Bright lights
are shining ♪
347
00:14:05.529 --> 00:14:08.263
- Hey, when you said
you were almost back up there,
348
00:14:08.298 --> 00:14:10.131
what'd you mean?
I mean,
349
00:14:10.166 --> 00:14:11.310
you've been there already?
- What, you really
350
00:14:11.334 --> 00:14:12.445
don't remember me
telling you this?
351
00:14:12.469 --> 00:14:14.202
- No.
- Everything was perfect
352
00:14:14.237 --> 00:14:15.503
until I got kicked out.
- Wait,
353
00:14:15.539 --> 00:14:17.305
I didn't know angels
got kicked out.
354
00:14:17.340 --> 00:14:19.173
- Yeah, about 10%
of all the angels on Earth
355
00:14:19.209 --> 00:14:20.386
got kicked out of Heaven.
Don't you read
356
00:14:20.410 --> 00:14:22.443
my angel union emails?
- There's just so many.
357
00:14:22.479 --> 00:14:25.146
They're like the Linkedln
invite of the afterlife.
358
00:14:25.181 --> 00:14:26.425
Hi, can I get a large,
triple-shot caramel mocha,
359
00:14:26.449 --> 00:14:28.416
extra whip,
and go crazy on the drizzle.
360
00:14:28.451 --> 00:14:31.352
- And I'll just
get a black coffee.
361
00:14:31.388 --> 00:14:33.221
Keep the change.
Really?
362
00:14:33.256 --> 00:14:35.234
- I can eat whatever I want
without gaining weight.
363
00:14:35.258 --> 00:14:37.258
What part of that
do you not understand?
364
00:14:37.294 --> 00:14:38.437
- Okay, just because
you can do something
365
00:14:38.461 --> 00:14:40.328
doesn't mean you should.
- Yeah, I disagree
366
00:14:40.363 --> 00:14:42.196
with every part
of that advice.
367
00:14:42.232 --> 00:14:43.531
- Mm...
- So what did you think
368
00:14:43.567 --> 00:14:45.533
of Heaven?
- Oh, my gosh... Heaven, it's...
369
00:14:45.569 --> 00:14:48.403
It was a perfect paradise,
and then...
370
00:14:48.438 --> 00:14:51.306
after a century,
I just got bored.
371
00:14:51.341 --> 00:14:53.541
I started to act out.
I stole Gandhi's Ferrari, I...
372
00:14:53.577 --> 00:14:55.543
- Wait.
Gandhi has a Ferrari?
373
00:14:55.579 --> 00:14:59.213
- Oh, baby, Gandhi is super
materialistic up there.
374
00:14:59.249 --> 00:15:00.426
But he left the keys
in the ignition... like,
375
00:15:00.450 --> 00:15:01.382
what was I supposed to do?
- I get it.
376
00:15:01.418 --> 00:15:03.351
- Right?
- I get it.
377
00:15:03.386 --> 00:15:05.253
- Gandhi, Lincoln... FYI,
they run Heaven.
378
00:15:05.288 --> 00:15:06.354
- Oh, well, tell me more.
379
00:15:06.389 --> 00:15:08.289
- I don't know.
I messed up.
380
00:15:08.325 --> 00:15:10.358
I took all of that perfection
for granted,
381
00:15:10.393 --> 00:15:12.293
and it wasn't until
I came back down here
382
00:15:12.329 --> 00:15:14.262
that I realized how good
I had it up there.
383
00:15:14.297 --> 00:15:16.130
- Leonard?
- Yes.
384
00:15:16.166 --> 00:15:18.166
- Your order's up.
- Thank you so much.
385
00:15:18.201 --> 00:15:19.345
- Do you think I'll ever
get up there?
386
00:15:19.369 --> 00:15:20.401
- Not a chance.
387
00:15:20.437 --> 00:15:22.337
I'm-I'm just saying.
Hey, you...
388
00:15:22.372 --> 00:15:24.138
I've seen a lot of angels
get to Heaven,
389
00:15:24.174 --> 00:15:25.351
and the ones that get up there
390
00:15:25.375 --> 00:15:27.308
are the ones
who really want to.
391
00:15:27.344 --> 00:15:29.177
What does that mean?
392
00:15:29.212 --> 00:15:30.423
I mean, of course
I want to get up there.
393
00:15:30.447 --> 00:15:32.213
I'm really bad at my job...
394
00:15:32.248 --> 00:15:33.392
I've kept distance
from everyone.
395
00:15:33.416 --> 00:15:36.250
No real relationships,
no real friends...
396
00:15:36.286 --> 00:15:38.386
Well, except you...
I guess.
397
00:15:38.421 --> 00:15:39.421
- "I guess"?
398
00:15:39.456 --> 00:15:41.422
Look, you don't
show initiative.
399
00:15:41.458 --> 00:15:43.157
That's your problem.
You don't!
400
00:15:43.193 --> 00:15:44.437
Okay, tell me:
when's the last time
401
00:15:44.461 --> 00:15:48.363
you did a miracle on your own,
without the app?
402
00:15:48.398 --> 00:15:50.365
Uh-huh.
See?
403
00:15:50.400 --> 00:15:51.444
Stuff like that
gets noticed.
404
00:15:51.468 --> 00:15:53.401
The Universe,
the guys upstairs,
405
00:15:53.436 --> 00:15:57.372
they're looking for you
to prove something.
406
00:15:57.407 --> 00:16:00.141
And you'd know this if you
attended any of the meetings.
407
00:16:00.176 --> 00:16:03.144
- There are meetings?
- Pyke, you're so bad at this.
408
00:16:05.699 --> 00:16:06.699
♪
409
00:16:14.808 --> 00:16:16.708
- 11th Street Station.
410
00:16:16.743 --> 00:16:19.744
Transfers available for
the J, M, and Z lines.
411
00:16:22.682 --> 00:16:24.749
- Oh! Ma'am!
412
00:16:24.784 --> 00:16:25.795
- Oh...
- I think you dropped this.
413
00:16:25.819 --> 00:16:27.518
- Thank you so much.
414
00:16:27.554 --> 00:16:28.720
- Aw, you're welcome.
415
00:16:28.755 --> 00:16:30.521
I find it's the little gestures
like this
416
00:16:30.557 --> 00:16:31.701
that really add up in the end.
417
00:16:31.725 --> 00:16:34.726
You're a real angel.
418
00:16:34.761 --> 00:16:35.761
- Two points?
419
00:16:35.795 --> 00:16:38.529
Ugh, damn it.
420
00:16:40.834 --> 00:16:41.799
Hey, Barker.
What are you up to?
421
00:16:41.835 --> 00:16:43.701
Uh-huh.
Uh-huh.
422
00:16:43.737 --> 00:16:45.770
Really?
423
00:16:45.805 --> 00:16:46.771
Listen, I'm just gonna
interrupt you
424
00:16:46.806 --> 00:16:47.772
I'm coming over.
425
00:16:47.807 --> 00:16:49.807
See you in 30.
426
00:16:49.843 --> 00:16:51.642
- ♪ What's up
on the other side? ♪
427
00:16:51.678 --> 00:16:52.755
♪ Is it greener?
Is it better? ♪
428
00:16:52.779 --> 00:16:54.679
Thanks.
429
00:16:54.714 --> 00:16:56.781
I needed that.
I kind of had a tough day.
430
00:16:56.816 --> 00:16:58.750
It feels good to hang out
with a friend.
431
00:16:58.785 --> 00:17:00.818
- Oh, yeah?
Is that what we are?
432
00:17:00.854 --> 00:17:02.798
'Cause your last ten texts
to me just say, "you up?"
433
00:17:02.822 --> 00:17:04.800
- Look, I care about
you in a non-romantic way.
434
00:17:04.824 --> 00:17:06.691
That's what I'd call a friend.
435
00:17:06.726 --> 00:17:07.770
- All right.
Let me ask you a question.
436
00:17:07.794 --> 00:17:09.827
- Mm.
- What's my first name?
437
00:17:09.863 --> 00:17:11.829
- ♪ Some new stakes,
some new stones ♪
438
00:17:11.865 --> 00:17:15.533
- I want to say... Colton.
439
00:17:15.568 --> 00:17:16.768
- Mm, nope.
It's James.
440
00:17:16.803 --> 00:17:18.770
- Oh.
Okay then, James.
441
00:17:18.805 --> 00:17:20.705
Ah, nope.
It's weird.
442
00:17:20.740 --> 00:17:24.675
Barker, you, uh...
you mind if I stay over?
443
00:17:24.711 --> 00:17:25.788
It's coming down
pretty hard out there.
444
00:17:25.812 --> 00:17:27.678
- Really?
- Mm-hmm.
445
00:17:27.714 --> 00:17:29.647
- Wow.
Somebody finally wants
446
00:17:29.682 --> 00:17:30.826
to sleep over.
- Don't make a big deal
447
00:17:30.850 --> 00:17:32.717
about it.
And please,
448
00:17:32.752 --> 00:17:34.685
do not spoon me.
The last thing I need
449
00:17:34.721 --> 00:17:36.561
is you draped over my back
like a meat blanket.
450
00:17:36.589 --> 00:17:37.722
- Nope, nothing romantic.
451
00:17:37.757 --> 00:17:39.824
Just a couple friends
sharing the same bed
452
00:17:39.859 --> 00:17:42.593
that they just had sex in.
Night, Pyke.
453
00:17:42.629 --> 00:17:43.861
- Night, Barker.
454
00:17:43.897 --> 00:17:46.864
♪
455
00:17:46.900 --> 00:17:49.801
I know this afterlife thing
seems like a pretty good deal.
456
00:17:49.836 --> 00:17:51.769
I get to eat whatever I want,
live in New York,
457
00:17:51.805 --> 00:17:54.739
have great sex, be hot.
458
00:17:54.774 --> 00:17:56.741
You know, but it gets old
after a while.
459
00:17:56.776 --> 00:17:58.609
You know, I feel like
I'm... stuck,
460
00:17:58.645 --> 00:17:59.777
but stuck forever.
461
00:17:59.813 --> 00:18:02.680
You know, I can't have a life,
because I'm trying to leave,
462
00:18:02.715 --> 00:18:03.826
and that can happen
at any moment.
463
00:18:03.850 --> 00:18:05.783
I also can't have a life
because...
464
00:18:05.819 --> 00:18:08.453
technically, I'm dead.
465
00:18:08.488 --> 00:18:09.765
The rule is, you can't
contact anyone
466
00:18:09.789 --> 00:18:11.622
from your old life...
No one.
467
00:18:11.658 --> 00:18:13.691
Parents, siblings, friends.
468
00:18:13.726 --> 00:18:16.727
Like, I can't see them,
I can't ask how they're doing.
469
00:18:16.763 --> 00:18:18.596
They can't know about
any of this.
470
00:18:18.631 --> 00:18:21.833
If I contact anyone,
I lose all of my points.
471
00:18:21.868 --> 00:18:23.734
I can't see my husband.
472
00:18:23.770 --> 00:18:26.838
I can't call Patrick
and be like, "Don't be sad.
473
00:18:26.873 --> 00:18:30.708
I have a waitress job
and great hair, so I'm fine."
474
00:18:30.743 --> 00:18:33.678
Like, I'm not supposed to,
but I check up on Facebook.
475
00:18:33.713 --> 00:18:36.647
Most angels aren't on Facebook,
so I haven't gotten caught.
476
00:18:39.652 --> 00:18:46.624
♪
477
00:19:22.562 --> 00:19:24.629
Man, this girl likes
a lot of soup.
478
00:19:24.664 --> 00:19:26.597
- Huh?
What soup?
479
00:19:37.710 --> 00:19:41.646
Aww, hey, sleepyhead.
Time to wake up.
480
00:19:41.681 --> 00:19:42.681
I made you
481
00:19:42.715 --> 00:19:43.715
a little breakfast.
482
00:19:43.750 --> 00:19:46.517
- Well, thank you.
- Yeah.
483
00:19:46.553 --> 00:19:47.863
Yeah, the eggs are
totally organic...
484
00:19:47.887 --> 00:19:49.787
Locally and ethically
raised hens,
485
00:19:49.822 --> 00:19:51.756
so, we're good.
486
00:19:51.824 --> 00:19:54.492
- Oh, great.
487
00:19:54.527 --> 00:19:56.761
Wow... never seen your bedroom
in the daylight before.
488
00:19:56.796 --> 00:19:58.729
What's with all this
Parisian crap?
489
00:19:58.765 --> 00:20:00.765
- Do you really want to know,
or are you just
490
00:20:00.800 --> 00:20:02.533
gonna make fun of me?
- No, we are having
491
00:20:02.569 --> 00:20:03.746
a real conversation.
I'm taking it seriously.
492
00:20:03.770 --> 00:20:05.836
- Hm.
Okay.
493
00:20:05.872 --> 00:20:08.806
Well, it's always been a dream
of mine to go to France.
494
00:20:08.841 --> 00:20:10.708
- Why would I make fun of that?
495
00:20:10.743 --> 00:20:12.710
Just because you share
the same dream
496
00:20:12.745 --> 00:20:14.812
as every
basic 12-year-old girl.
497
00:20:14.847 --> 00:20:17.748
Do you also dream
of holding hands
498
00:20:17.784 --> 00:20:19.695
with Harry Styles and
brushing your horse's mane?
499
00:20:19.719 --> 00:20:21.686
- Oh, see, see, see?
I knew it.
500
00:20:21.721 --> 00:20:23.799
I knew you couldn't be nice to
me for more than five seconds.
501
00:20:23.823 --> 00:20:26.824
- Oh, I can be nicer to you
for a lot longer than that.
502
00:20:26.859 --> 00:20:28.859
- Nope.
I gotta save my strength
503
00:20:28.895 --> 00:20:30.728
for my morning run to Maspeth.
504
00:20:30.763 --> 00:20:32.830
- You are gonna leave me
and this warm bed
505
00:20:32.865 --> 00:20:34.665
to go running around
506
00:20:34.701 --> 00:20:35.778
some abandoned buildings
in the snow?
507
00:20:35.802 --> 00:20:36.901
- Yeah.
I like to run
508
00:20:36.936 --> 00:20:38.769
where I can have some space
to think.
509
00:20:38.805 --> 00:20:39.815
It's what I do.
510
00:20:39.839 --> 00:20:42.540
- Hmm...
511
00:20:42.575 --> 00:20:43.908
oh, looks like
I have to go too.
512
00:20:43.943 --> 00:20:46.544
I'm trying this new strategy of
showing some ambition at work.
513
00:20:46.579 --> 00:20:47.790
- Oh, that'll make
Connie happy.
514
00:20:47.814 --> 00:20:49.847
- Oh, God... not at the bistro.
515
00:20:49.882 --> 00:20:51.860
You know, I told you...
At my other job... you know,
516
00:20:51.884 --> 00:20:54.919
the one that's getting me
closer to, uh... Nebraska.
517
00:20:59.592 --> 00:21:00.736
- Hey, so while
you're swallowing
518
00:21:00.760 --> 00:21:02.760
that breakfast whole
like a duck,
519
00:21:02.795 --> 00:21:03.761
there's something that
I want to talk to you about.
520
00:21:03.796 --> 00:21:05.529
- Mm-hmm.
- I'm cooking
521
00:21:05.565 --> 00:21:06.864
a little Christmas
dinner tonight
522
00:21:06.899 --> 00:21:08.711
for a few friends...
Preparing everything fresh,
523
00:21:08.735 --> 00:21:09.834
even the eggnog.
Now,
524
00:21:09.869 --> 00:21:12.503
my homemade eggnog recipe
is the best.
525
00:21:12.538 --> 00:21:14.872
It's the perfect ratio
of rum to nog.
526
00:21:14.907 --> 00:21:16.841
- Mmm.
- Anyway,
527
00:21:16.876 --> 00:21:19.543
it would mean a lot to me
if you were there.
528
00:21:19.579 --> 00:21:22.813
- Barker, this was delicious,
but I told you before,
529
00:21:22.849 --> 00:21:24.749
my schedule at this other job
is very demanding.
530
00:21:24.784 --> 00:21:26.751
It's a lot of work
to get to Nebraska.
531
00:21:26.786 --> 00:21:27.830
I just... I can't make
plans like that.
532
00:21:27.854 --> 00:21:29.754
I'm sorry.
- I think it wouldn't be
533
00:21:29.789 --> 00:21:31.689
that hard to get to Nebraska.
- Ugh, believe me,
534
00:21:31.724 --> 00:21:33.524
it's nearly impossible.
535
00:21:33.559 --> 00:21:35.726
- Look, just promise me
whenever you do leave,
536
00:21:35.762 --> 00:21:37.528
you'll talk to me first.
- Promise.
537
00:21:37.563 --> 00:21:40.564
Bye, Barker.
538
00:21:45.605 --> 00:21:52.576
♪
539
00:21:56.749 --> 00:21:59.817
Hi... oh, my God,
the memories.
540
00:21:59.852 --> 00:22:03.554
- What?
- I lived in this exact room.
541
00:22:03.589 --> 00:22:04.800
I didn't decorate it with quite
542
00:22:04.824 --> 00:22:06.857
as many old bowls
of cereal, but...
543
00:22:06.893 --> 00:22:09.727
- Who are you?
- I'm Allison, class of '99.
544
00:22:12.665 --> 00:22:14.832
You look like a... smart guy.
545
00:22:14.867 --> 00:22:16.767
Are you perhaps working
on an important project
546
00:22:16.803 --> 00:22:18.803
on your computer?
Something big, maybe?
547
00:22:18.838 --> 00:22:20.738
Bigger than Facebook
or Candy Crush?
548
00:22:20.773 --> 00:22:22.573
Something the world
desperately needs?
549
00:22:22.608 --> 00:22:24.809
- How did you know?
550
00:22:24.844 --> 00:22:26.510
- You have that air about you.
551
00:22:27.847 --> 00:22:29.547
You know,
when I was back in school,
552
00:22:29.582 --> 00:22:30.881
I accidentally fried
my computer?
553
00:22:30.917 --> 00:22:34.819
You know, you really should
get a surge protector.
554
00:22:34.854 --> 00:22:36.520
Problem solved.
555
00:22:39.559 --> 00:22:42.560
Six points?
556
00:22:42.595 --> 00:22:43.872
I thought you said
you were working on something
557
00:22:43.896 --> 00:22:45.596
that the world needed.
558
00:22:45.631 --> 00:22:48.833
- I am.
It's a love song.
559
00:22:48.868 --> 00:22:50.801
- I am so angry right now,
560
00:22:50.837 --> 00:22:52.536
I think I might throw up.
561
00:22:55.708 --> 00:22:57.586
- Yo, Pyke, what's good?
562
00:22:57.610 --> 00:22:58.787
Hey!
Oh, no, you can't park here.
563
00:22:58.811 --> 00:23:01.512
You got to keep going.
Thank you so much.
564
00:23:01.547 --> 00:23:02.624
Merry Christmas.
565
00:23:02.648 --> 00:23:03.781
The finger's not necessary.
566
00:23:03.816 --> 00:23:05.750
- Are you on a parking job?
- Don't judge me.
567
00:23:05.785 --> 00:23:07.752
I got to grind out
these points somehow.
568
00:23:07.787 --> 00:23:09.865
Mother of three needs a space
in front of her pediatrician.
569
00:23:09.889 --> 00:23:12.490
- Look, I need your advice on
an unsanctioned love miracle.
570
00:23:12.525 --> 00:23:14.725
- Showing initiative.
I like it.
571
00:23:14.761 --> 00:23:16.861
Hey, and Pyke,
those points can be huge
572
00:23:16.896 --> 00:23:18.729
if the couples
are well matched.
573
00:23:18.765 --> 00:23:20.542
- Unfortunately, I think
this guy's one of a kind.
574
00:23:20.566 --> 00:23:22.633
- Well, it's not like
I can help you anyway.
575
00:23:22.668 --> 00:23:23.846
Pyke, you know I'm not good
with the emotional stuff.
576
00:23:23.870 --> 00:23:26.804
My dad, he raised me
old-school, okay?
577
00:23:26.839 --> 00:23:28.773
When he was on his deathbed,
I said good-bye
578
00:23:28.808 --> 00:23:30.775
with a handshake.
Good-bye!
579
00:23:30.810 --> 00:23:32.755
- Look, can you just tell me
how the other angels do it?
580
00:23:32.779 --> 00:23:34.612
- Yes.
The ones who succeed...
581
00:23:34.647 --> 00:23:36.814
Oh, my gosh.
You are hilarious.
582
00:23:36.849 --> 00:23:38.816
There's cute spots down there.
I promise.
583
00:23:38.851 --> 00:23:39.750
♪ Bring us
some figgy pudding ♪
584
00:23:39.786 --> 00:23:41.819
Yes, the ones who succeed
585
00:23:41.854 --> 00:23:43.632
usually have a natural sense
of compassion and empathy,
586
00:23:43.656 --> 00:23:45.723
so...
You're screwed.
587
00:23:50.630 --> 00:23:53.564
Okay, so tell me
about this girl you like.
588
00:23:53.599 --> 00:23:54.799
- Katie.
589
00:23:54.834 --> 00:23:58.569
She's this...
this girl... I like.
590
00:23:58.604 --> 00:24:01.572
- Okay, well,
does she like you?
591
00:24:01.607 --> 00:24:03.808
- Oh, we've never
actually spoken,
592
00:24:03.843 --> 00:24:06.777
but I spent the last two weeks
writing her this song
593
00:24:06.813 --> 00:24:08.746
for Christmas.
594
00:24:08.781 --> 00:24:11.482
I'm a DJ... mostly ambient dub,
595
00:24:11.517 --> 00:24:13.751
but also a little Euro-trance.
596
00:24:16.622 --> 00:24:18.556
♪
597
00:24:18.591 --> 00:24:20.491
♪ Oh, Katie
598
00:24:20.526 --> 00:24:21.770
♪ Your star is
brightly shining ♪
599
00:24:21.794 --> 00:24:24.862
♪ It is the night
of our dear Katie's birth ♪
600
00:24:24.897 --> 00:24:26.831
- Katie, Katie, Katie, Katie.
601
00:24:26.866 --> 00:24:29.500
Katie, Katie.
- ♪ A thrill of hope
602
00:24:29.535 --> 00:24:30.879
- Katie.
- ♪ My weary heart rejoices
603
00:24:30.903 --> 00:24:32.803
- That's... okay, yeah...
- ♪ Yonder breaks
604
00:24:32.839 --> 00:24:34.583
♪ a new glorious...
- That's good... thank you,
605
00:24:34.607 --> 00:24:36.774
Thank you.
Um... so... question:
606
00:24:36.809 --> 00:24:40.611
what inspired... this?
607
00:24:40.646 --> 00:24:43.781
- I see her every day,
608
00:24:43.816 --> 00:24:46.784
and it's like...
she's the best.
609
00:24:46.819 --> 00:24:50.821
So this song is like my secret
610
00:24:50.857 --> 00:24:54.892
that I'm finally ready
to share with her.
611
00:24:54.927 --> 00:24:56.660
- Where does this Katie live?
612
00:24:56.696 --> 00:24:59.463
- 239, across the hall.
613
00:25:12.645 --> 00:25:16.780
♪
614
00:25:16.816 --> 00:25:19.783
- Katie, I've...
I've left him.
615
00:25:19.819 --> 00:25:22.553
He's all yours.
- Left who?
616
00:25:22.588 --> 00:25:24.855
- Jesse.
My boyfriend Jesse.
617
00:25:24.891 --> 00:25:26.790
- Jesse?
618
00:25:26.826 --> 00:25:28.792
From down the hall?
619
00:25:28.828 --> 00:25:31.862
I've never even spoken to him.
620
00:25:31.898 --> 00:25:36.600
- I can feel
the chemistry from here.
621
00:25:36.636 --> 00:25:38.502
Take good care of him.
622
00:25:38.538 --> 00:25:40.638
He knows how to make a girl
feel really special.
623
00:25:40.673 --> 00:25:42.773
Just enjoy it.
624
00:25:47.847 --> 00:25:54.852
♪
625
00:25:55.922 --> 00:25:57.888
Ugh...
626
00:25:57.924 --> 00:26:04.662
♪
627
00:26:09.502 --> 00:26:11.468
What?
628
00:26:11.504 --> 00:26:13.837
What is happening?
Oh, my God.
629
00:26:13.873 --> 00:26:17.708
♪
630
00:26:17.743 --> 00:26:19.510
Oh, my God, I did it.
631
00:26:25.918 --> 00:26:28.252
- ♪ Glo-o-o-oria,
glo-o-o-ria ♪
632
00:26:28.287 --> 00:26:31.922
♪ Glo-o-o-oria
- ♪ Gloria, gloria
633
00:26:31.958 --> 00:26:35.225
♪ Hosanna in the highest
634
00:26:35.261 --> 00:26:38.896
♪ E'en so,
here below, below ♪
635
00:26:38.931 --> 00:26:40.164
- Pyke.
- Oh, hi.
636
00:26:40.199 --> 00:26:42.660
- You did it.
637
00:26:42.101 --> 00:26:44.168
And it only took you
nine years...
638
00:26:44.203 --> 00:26:46.360
One of my longest projects
ever,
639
00:26:46.720 --> 00:26:48.500
so they sent me to
congratulate you personally,
640
00:26:48.400 --> 00:26:50.908
which was a bit of a hassle,
since I was on set, but...
641
00:26:50.943 --> 00:26:53.143
- Oh, that's cool.
Like a local commercial?
642
00:26:53.179 --> 00:26:55.112
- Like a television series
643
00:26:55.147 --> 00:26:58.480
that'll be seen by millions
of people, but whatever.
644
00:26:58.840 --> 00:26:59.883
We don't have time for this.
645
00:26:59.919 --> 00:27:01.960
You have got to get
to the Newark bus station
646
00:27:01.120 --> 00:27:03.200
and catch the 1:05
to Schenectady.
647
00:27:03.550 --> 00:27:05.856
- Wait, wait, wait.
I'm taking a bus...
648
00:27:05.891 --> 00:27:07.157
to Heaven?
In Jersey?
649
00:27:07.193 --> 00:27:08.993
- Yeah, I know we're
supposed to say
650
00:27:09.280 --> 00:27:10.995
the Universe does
everything for a reason,
651
00:27:11.300 --> 00:27:12.975
but sometimes I think they just
make it up as they go along.
652
00:27:12.999 --> 00:27:14.898
Oh, and you've got to be
653
00:27:14.934 --> 00:27:16.233
on that exact bus,
654
00:27:16.268 --> 00:27:19.870
or your points go back to zero.
- Back to zero?
655
00:27:19.905 --> 00:27:22.873
That's unnecessarily harsh.
- Well, there's precedent.
656
00:27:22.908 --> 00:27:24.975
St. Francis of Assisi
went out drinking
657
00:27:25.110 --> 00:27:28.450
after he finished his project,
got some girl pregnant.
658
00:27:28.800 --> 00:27:30.114
Frankie, no bueno!
659
00:27:30.149 --> 00:27:32.149
You can catch the C train
just around the corner.
660
00:27:32.184 --> 00:27:34.885
It'll get you there on time...
If you hustle!
661
00:27:34.920 --> 00:27:36.220
- Okay.
Ah... okay, well...
662
00:27:36.255 --> 00:27:38.922
I guess I'm out of here.
- Go, please...
663
00:27:38.958 --> 00:27:40.991
Before they realize
what a mistake they made.
664
00:27:41.270 --> 00:27:43.160
- I'll keep a pie warm for you.
665
00:27:43.195 --> 00:27:47.640
- I always knew
you knew who I was!
666
00:27:47.990 --> 00:27:48.265
Hi.
- Hey.
667
00:27:48.300 --> 00:27:52.236
- Yeah, it's me.
It's me.
668
00:27:52.271 --> 00:27:54.238
Sorry, nope.
I got to get back to set.
669
00:27:54.273 --> 00:27:56.600
No pictures.
670
00:27:56.420 --> 00:28:01.845
♪
671
00:28:01.881 --> 00:28:03.250
- Excuse me... excuse me,
excuse me, excuse me.
672
00:28:03.490 --> 00:28:05.820
No, no.
I need one ticket
673
00:28:05.117 --> 00:28:07.840
for the 1:05 to Schenectady.
674
00:28:07.119 --> 00:28:09.131
- Okay, well, there's a 1:15.
Should be here any minute.
675
00:28:09.155 --> 00:28:11.210
- No, no, no.
I need the 1:05...
676
00:28:11.570 --> 00:28:13.570
That exact bus.
If I don't get on the 1:05 bus,
677
00:28:13.920 --> 00:28:14.925
I can't go.
- In ten minutes,
678
00:28:14.960 --> 00:28:16.710
there's a bus to Schenectady.
679
00:28:16.950 --> 00:28:18.280
Get on it,
and you'll go Schenectady.
680
00:28:18.640 --> 00:28:19.863
It's how buses work.
681
00:28:19.899 --> 00:28:21.932
- I need the 1:05.
- There is no 1:05.
682
00:28:21.967 --> 00:28:25.200
It's Christmas Eve.
It's a holiday schedule.
683
00:28:25.370 --> 00:28:27.938
And the next 1:05
to Schenectady is on the 26th.
684
00:28:27.973 --> 00:28:29.907
Now, you can wait two days,
685
00:28:29.942 --> 00:28:33.143
or, you know, you can wait
ten minutes for the 1:15.
686
00:28:33.179 --> 00:28:35.946
- Yeah, Merry Christmas.
687
00:28:35.981 --> 00:28:38.150
- You know what's funny?
If we were filming
688
00:28:38.500 --> 00:28:41.180
a movie right now,
this would just be water.
689
00:28:41.530 --> 00:28:42.230
Isn't that crazy?
Just a little
690
00:28:42.254 --> 00:28:43.965
inside of Hollywood for you.
691
00:28:43.989 --> 00:28:45.956
Oh... huh.
692
00:28:45.991 --> 00:28:47.891
Hi. What are you doing?
Are you on the bus?
693
00:28:47.927 --> 00:28:49.159
There is no 1:05 bus.
694
00:28:49.195 --> 00:28:51.950
There is a 1:15 bus
because of Christmas.
695
00:28:51.130 --> 00:28:53.197
The 1:05 isn't until the 26th.
696
00:28:53.232 --> 00:28:55.232
- Okay, cool.
So, uh...
697
00:28:55.267 --> 00:28:57.234
looks like you got
a two-day extension.
698
00:28:57.269 --> 00:29:00.170
Enjoy it, and then get
back there on the 26th.
699
00:29:00.206 --> 00:29:02.840
Margo, will you slice me off a
little more of that headcheese?
700
00:29:02.108 --> 00:29:03.907
- Of course.
- A little bit.
701
00:29:03.943 --> 00:29:05.200
Thanks.
- What is headcheese?
702
00:29:05.440 --> 00:29:06.910
- You can take the boy
out of Ukraine...
703
00:29:06.946 --> 00:29:08.780
Right?
704
00:29:08.114 --> 00:29:10.914
Mmm... mmm.
705
00:29:10.950 --> 00:29:13.917
Mmm.
Thank you.
706
00:29:13.953 --> 00:29:15.300
- How are you already
with a woman?
707
00:29:15.540 --> 00:29:16.131
I left you
less than an hour ago.
708
00:29:16.155 --> 00:29:17.855
- How?
Pyke,
709
00:29:17.890 --> 00:29:19.123
beautiful women all over
710
00:29:19.158 --> 00:29:21.125
this great country appreciate
the body of work
711
00:29:21.160 --> 00:29:24.228
that I've put out over
the last 20, 25 years, okay?
712
00:29:24.263 --> 00:29:26.930
Plus, I let them put it
on their social
713
00:29:26.966 --> 00:29:28.110
if they promise not to tag me.
714
00:29:28.134 --> 00:29:29.244
You're not gonna tag me, right?
715
00:29:29.268 --> 00:29:30.968
- No.
- Okay.
716
00:29:31.300 --> 00:29:32.870
You know, Pyke,
717
00:29:32.905 --> 00:29:35.239
I will never understand
why you got a job as a waitress
718
00:29:35.274 --> 00:29:37.241
instead of trying
to become a celebrity.
719
00:29:37.276 --> 00:29:39.877
What were you thinking?
720
00:29:39.912 --> 00:29:42.112
- Well, I didn't plan on
being here for nine years.
721
00:29:42.148 --> 00:29:44.140
Look, I lost everything
when I died.
722
00:29:44.490 --> 00:29:45.983
Being an angel doesn't
make me happy like you.
723
00:29:46.180 --> 00:29:48.152
- Yeah.
724
00:29:48.187 --> 00:29:53.123
Happy... like we were.
725
00:29:53.159 --> 00:29:56.126
Like me.
726
00:29:56.162 --> 00:30:00.164
- Are you crying?
- What?
727
00:30:00.199 --> 00:30:02.933
Stop, stop.
I'm... no, I'm not crying.
728
00:30:02.968 --> 00:30:06.103
I just got
a little...
729
00:30:06.138 --> 00:30:09.600
headcheese stuck...
No, listen, Pyke.
730
00:30:09.410 --> 00:30:11.800
Pyke, do not get
in trouble, okay?
731
00:30:11.430 --> 00:30:13.430
You are still
considered active.
732
00:30:13.780 --> 00:30:15.145
You can still lose points.
Okay?
733
00:30:15.181 --> 00:30:17.159
- Look, I am not gonna do
anything for the next two days.
734
00:30:17.183 --> 00:30:19.917
I am going to lock my doors,
get into bed,
735
00:30:19.952 --> 00:30:22.520
and watch
a "Real Housewife" or seven.
736
00:30:22.870 --> 00:30:23.987
- Great.
737
00:30:29.328 --> 00:30:31.261
♪
738
00:30:31.297 --> 00:30:34.965
- ♪ I'm looking at
the cloudy skies ♪
739
00:30:35.000 --> 00:30:38.680
♪ I look ahead
and see my sorrow ♪
740
00:30:38.103 --> 00:30:41.710
♪
741
00:30:41.106 --> 00:30:44.740
♪ No choice
but to live tomorrow ♪
742
00:30:44.109 --> 00:30:47.110
♪
743
00:30:47.146 --> 00:30:50.800
♪ Nothing else left to do
744
00:30:50.115 --> 00:30:52.820
♪
745
00:30:52.117 --> 00:30:54.151
- Oh, crap.
- "Crap"?
746
00:30:54.186 --> 00:30:55.986
"Oh, crap" what?
747
00:30:56.210 --> 00:30:57.321
- Patrick?
- Who's Patrick?
748
00:30:57.356 --> 00:30:59.122
Wait, Patrick...
Your husband Patrick?
749
00:30:59.158 --> 00:31:01.124
- Patrick.
750
00:31:01.160 --> 00:31:03.193
Patrick.
751
00:31:03.229 --> 00:31:05.195
- Yes?
752
00:31:05.231 --> 00:31:06.997
- Pyke?
753
00:31:07.320 --> 00:31:08.980
Wait.
754
00:31:11.103 --> 00:31:13.136
♪
755
00:31:13.172 --> 00:31:15.906
- I'm sorry, do I know you?
756
00:31:15.941 --> 00:31:18.750
- Hi, babe.
Sorry I lost you
757
00:31:18.110 --> 00:31:20.911
for a minute there.
I was just in the bathroom.
758
00:31:20.946 --> 00:31:22.190
There was this really nice lady
sleeping on the floor,
759
00:31:22.214 --> 00:31:23.947
but I just wanted to make sure
760
00:31:23.983 --> 00:31:26.950
she wasn't exposing
herself any longer.
761
00:31:26.986 --> 00:31:28.218
Who's this?
762
00:31:28.254 --> 00:31:30.153
- I don't know.
Uh...
763
00:31:30.189 --> 00:31:33.230
I feel like
I've seen you before.
764
00:31:36.950 --> 00:31:38.128
- We all know
the rules... all angels.
765
00:31:38.163 --> 00:31:40.208
You cannot communicate
with anyone from your old life.
766
00:31:40.232 --> 00:31:42.110
You know, it confuses
the whole life and death thing
767
00:31:42.134 --> 00:31:43.934
and screws up the system.
768
00:31:43.969 --> 00:31:45.113
Like, if by any chance you run
769
00:31:45.137 --> 00:31:46.970
into someone
from your old life,
770
00:31:47.600 --> 00:31:49.390
you must turn around
without saying a word,
771
00:31:49.740 --> 00:31:52.900
and so that is exactly
what I'm gonna do.
772
00:31:54.313 --> 00:31:58.181
Hi, Patrick.
I'm Allison Pyke.
773
00:31:58.217 --> 00:32:01.180
- How do you know my name?
774
00:32:01.530 --> 00:32:06.924
- I know because...
I'm an angel.
775
00:32:06.959 --> 00:32:10.127
What I mean is, I'm a part
of a New York City
776
00:32:10.162 --> 00:32:12.162
Christmas initiative for locals
777
00:32:12.197 --> 00:32:14.965
to help out-of-towners
get around the city.
778
00:32:15.000 --> 00:32:17.134
I am here to help
and show you the sights.
779
00:32:17.169 --> 00:32:20.370
- Hmm...
780
00:32:21.974 --> 00:32:23.151
Patrick,
remember what your dad
781
00:32:23.175 --> 00:32:25.943
showed us online about
New York City scammers?
782
00:32:25.978 --> 00:32:27.188
She could be trying
to get us into a van,
783
00:32:27.212 --> 00:32:29.212
take us to a secure location,
steal our identities,
784
00:32:29.248 --> 00:32:31.140
charge a bunch of things
on our credit cards,
785
00:32:31.500 --> 00:32:32.160
and then get us
hooked on drugs.
786
00:32:32.184 --> 00:32:33.951
- Sweetie, I think
you've been watching
787
00:32:33.986 --> 00:32:35.152
too many Liam Neeson movies.
788
00:32:35.187 --> 00:32:36.954
- Well, at least
in a Liam Neeson movie,
789
00:32:36.989 --> 00:32:38.199
there'd be someone
protecting us.
790
00:32:38.223 --> 00:32:40.900
Neither of our dads are
in good enough shape
791
00:32:40.125 --> 00:32:43.260
to get revenge.
- Uh, guys, just so you know,
792
00:32:43.620 --> 00:32:44.928
I can hear most
of what you're saying.
793
00:32:47.199 --> 00:32:48.243
- See, this is exactly
why I wanted
794
00:32:48.267 --> 00:32:50.100
to take a direct flight to JFK
795
00:32:50.135 --> 00:32:51.179
instead of trying
to save a buck
796
00:32:51.203 --> 00:32:53.203
on a cheap Internet bus deal.
797
00:32:53.238 --> 00:32:57.174
These bus stations are
like magnets for con artists.
798
00:32:57.209 --> 00:32:59.176
- Guys, look,
I'm not a con artist.
799
00:32:59.211 --> 00:33:01.144
I'm not even a regular artist.
800
00:33:01.180 --> 00:33:03.191
I'm just here to make sure
you have a nice Christmas.
801
00:33:03.215 --> 00:33:05.115
That's my only job.
802
00:33:08.153 --> 00:33:11.540
♪
803
00:33:11.900 --> 00:33:13.560
- I think it...
- We appreciate it...
804
00:33:13.920 --> 00:33:16.590
We really do... but we've been
traveling all day, and anyway,
805
00:33:16.950 --> 00:33:18.195
we have the nice people
at the Midtown Travel Suites
806
00:33:18.230 --> 00:33:20.964
to show us around just fine.
Right?
807
00:33:26.238 --> 00:33:28.205
- Siri, call
the Midtown Travel Suites.
808
00:33:30.209 --> 00:33:34.144
- I'm sorry, but it looks like
your reservation was cancelled.
809
00:33:34.179 --> 00:33:35.979
- What?
- What?
810
00:33:36.150 --> 00:33:37.225
- How can it be cancelled?
We just got here.
811
00:33:37.249 --> 00:33:40.150
- Well, there's a note
right here.
812
00:33:40.185 --> 00:33:43.153
You called, said you wouldn't
be able to stay here
813
00:33:43.188 --> 00:33:45.880
because you had bedbugs,
814
00:33:45.124 --> 00:33:47.157
and the bedbugs are crawling
all over your skin
815
00:33:47.192 --> 00:33:50.994
because you're a gross person
who does gross things.
816
00:33:51.300 --> 00:33:52.240
- That does not sound like her.
- No.
817
00:33:52.264 --> 00:33:54.164
I never made
that phone call, okay?
818
00:33:54.199 --> 00:33:58.100
I am not a gross person.
I've never done gross things.
819
00:33:58.370 --> 00:34:01.972
I've never even passed gas in
front of another human being.
820
00:34:02.700 --> 00:34:05.420
- Can you un-cancel it, please?
Just find us a room.
821
00:34:05.770 --> 00:34:06.109
- We're all booked up.
822
00:34:06.145 --> 00:34:08.111
It's Christmas, you know?
823
00:34:08.147 --> 00:34:10.470
- Oh, my God.
824
00:34:10.820 --> 00:34:13.150
You two again?
What an incredible coincidence.
825
00:34:13.185 --> 00:34:17.220
- Oh, my God, the con artist.
826
00:34:17.256 --> 00:34:19.990
- Is everything okay?
827
00:34:20.250 --> 00:34:21.992
- They don't have a room
for us.
828
00:34:22.270 --> 00:34:23.226
- I am so sorry.
829
00:34:23.262 --> 00:34:26.263
You happen to be in luck.
I know an amazing Airbnb.
830
00:34:26.298 --> 00:34:29.166
My boss, Connie's, place...
Upper West Side.
831
00:34:29.201 --> 00:34:33.170
- Really?
'Cause that sounds amazing.
832
00:34:33.205 --> 00:34:35.105
- So how about it?
833
00:34:35.140 --> 00:34:36.985
- Uh, again, thanks so much,
but I think it's best
834
00:34:37.900 --> 00:34:38.208
if we find our own way.
835
00:34:38.243 --> 00:34:41.144
- Honey, we don't have
any other options.
836
00:34:41.180 --> 00:34:43.800
- You can trust me.
837
00:34:45.500 --> 00:34:46.216
- We can trust her.
838
00:34:46.251 --> 00:34:49.219
♪
839
00:34:49.254 --> 00:34:51.121
- It's Christmas Eve.
840
00:34:51.156 --> 00:34:52.267
Every hotel in the city
is gonna be booked.
841
00:34:52.291 --> 00:34:55.920
You have nowhere to go,
and here I am,
842
00:34:55.127 --> 00:34:58.195
willing to show you
a place to stay.
843
00:34:58.230 --> 00:35:03.233
Or, you could find a dark,
cold, feces-smeared alleyway
844
00:35:03.268 --> 00:35:05.202
and sleep on a bed
of rat carcasses.
845
00:35:05.237 --> 00:35:07.204
You know, your choice.
846
00:35:07.239 --> 00:35:09.720
- You hate feces.
847
00:35:11.910 --> 00:35:13.243
- Fine.
- Ah, great! Luggage.
848
00:35:13.278 --> 00:35:16.790
Oh, heavy.
You know, why don't you
849
00:35:16.115 --> 00:35:18.148
carry your own luggage?
Patrick, there are a ton
850
00:35:18.183 --> 00:35:20.228
of places I know you'd love.
- Oh, Jill actually wants
851
00:35:20.252 --> 00:35:22.152
to see the tree
at Rockefeller Center first.
852
00:35:22.187 --> 00:35:24.154
- Oh, yeah.
It's on my bucket list.
853
00:35:24.189 --> 00:35:26.000
I've wanted to see it
since I was a little girl.
854
00:35:26.240 --> 00:35:27.680
- Want to know
what's on my bucket list?
855
00:35:27.920 --> 00:35:28.191
Never see stupid crap.
856
00:35:32.631 --> 00:35:33.675
Are we any closer
857
00:35:33.699 --> 00:35:35.632
to our place
on the Upper West Side?
858
00:35:35.667 --> 00:35:36.733
- I mean, sure.
You're...
859
00:35:36.768 --> 00:35:38.635
closer than you were yesterday.
860
00:35:38.670 --> 00:35:40.770
So here we have a special place
861
00:35:40.806 --> 00:35:43.573
in rock and roll history.
Lou Reed wrote the song
862
00:35:43.609 --> 00:35:45.709
"Heroin" right here,
immediately after he bought
863
00:35:45.744 --> 00:35:48.411
heroin from right over there.
- No way.
864
00:35:48.447 --> 00:35:49.757
- Well, makes sense.
- Pyke, thank you
865
00:35:49.781 --> 00:35:53.783
for this very detailed history
of the music of New York.
866
00:35:53.819 --> 00:35:56.586
I mean, the stuff
about the Stooges
867
00:35:56.622 --> 00:35:58.355
and Velvet Underground...
I was obsessed
868
00:35:58.390 --> 00:35:59.667
with them in college.
- Yeah, I thought
869
00:35:59.691 --> 00:36:01.725
you might like it.
870
00:36:04.763 --> 00:36:07.664
- Okay, maybe we should
go back to a main road.
871
00:36:07.699 --> 00:36:10.700
I think we're close
to the Empire State Building.
872
00:36:10.736 --> 00:36:15.505
- So, Patrick, what made you
want to come to New York?
873
00:36:15.541 --> 00:36:17.574
- Well, I've been planning it
874
00:36:17.609 --> 00:36:20.377
for a long time...
Since I was a teenager...
875
00:36:20.412 --> 00:36:23.513
And... well, the timing
was finally right.
876
00:36:25.651 --> 00:36:28.685
- The beard suits you.
877
00:36:28.720 --> 00:36:31.388
- Thank you?
878
00:36:31.423 --> 00:36:34.391
- Okay.
Uh, we might be able to see
879
00:36:34.426 --> 00:36:36.760
the Statue of Liberty up here.
- Do you want to see
880
00:36:36.795 --> 00:36:39.563
where Iggy Pop threw up
on Andy Warhol's entourage?
881
00:36:39.598 --> 00:36:40.775
- Does David Bowie
wear eyeshadow?
882
00:36:42.734 --> 00:36:44.668
♪
883
00:36:44.703 --> 00:36:46.570
- I am sorry that I had
to cut the tour short
884
00:36:46.605 --> 00:36:48.705
because of my blisters,
885
00:36:48.740 --> 00:36:50.640
but I did not expect
to have to walk 12 miles.
886
00:36:50.676 --> 00:36:52.687
You know, I want to keep
my feet fresh for ice-skating
887
00:36:52.711 --> 00:36:54.644
at Rockefeller Center.
- Ah, New York has a way
888
00:36:54.680 --> 00:36:56.646
of finding out who's tough
enough to handle it.
889
00:36:56.682 --> 00:36:58.615
Plus, it gave us the perfect
excuse to sit down
890
00:36:58.650 --> 00:37:00.550
and have a meal at one
of the best places
891
00:37:00.586 --> 00:37:02.519
in all of New York.
The dumplings here
892
00:37:02.554 --> 00:37:04.588
are transcendent.
- Dumplings?
893
00:37:04.623 --> 00:37:06.656
Wow.
- Oh, don't worry, Jill.
894
00:37:06.692 --> 00:37:07.702
I ordered you soup.
I know it's your favorite.
895
00:37:07.726 --> 00:37:09.626
- How do you know
that I like soup?
896
00:37:09.661 --> 00:37:11.628
- Just based on that outfit.
897
00:37:17.703 --> 00:37:21.705
- Two order dumpling,
one order chicken feet soup.
898
00:37:21.740 --> 00:37:23.540
- Mm.
899
00:37:23.575 --> 00:37:24.619
- You don't have to eat that.
900
00:37:24.643 --> 00:37:26.576
We could share dumplings.
- Nope.
901
00:37:26.612 --> 00:37:28.712
That's... that's okay.
We are guests here,
902
00:37:28.747 --> 00:37:31.548
and I do not want to
insult our hosts.
903
00:37:35.454 --> 00:37:37.454
Okay, well,
904
00:37:37.489 --> 00:37:39.589
I think I'm just gonna
go wash my hands.
905
00:37:39.625 --> 00:37:41.691
Where's the bathroom?
- No bathroom.
906
00:37:41.727 --> 00:37:45.395
- Oh, there's a donut shop
across the street.
907
00:37:45.430 --> 00:37:47.464
- Do you need me
to go with you?
908
00:37:47.499 --> 00:37:49.599
- No, no, no.
909
00:37:49.635 --> 00:37:52.736
♪
910
00:37:52.771 --> 00:37:55.405
- I'm so excited to get
to take you here.
911
00:37:55.440 --> 00:37:58.441
These are gonna be the best
dumplings you've ever had.
912
00:37:58.477 --> 00:37:59.621
- I've had a few dumplings
in my life.
913
00:37:59.645 --> 00:38:01.411
- Well, not these.
914
00:38:01.446 --> 00:38:02.646
- Here goes.
- Ready?
915
00:38:06.385 --> 00:38:08.585
- Mmm... oh, my God.
- Right?
916
00:38:08.620 --> 00:38:09.631
- You were so right.
These are so good.
917
00:38:09.655 --> 00:38:12.656
- So good.
918
00:38:12.691 --> 00:38:15.458
- Mmm.
- So, um... Patrick,
919
00:38:15.494 --> 00:38:18.361
why, um... why is, um...
920
00:38:18.397 --> 00:38:20.664
now the right time
to visit New York?
921
00:38:24.636 --> 00:38:28.672
- I had a hard few years.
922
00:38:28.707 --> 00:38:30.640
- I'm sorry.
923
00:38:30.676 --> 00:38:33.376
- It's okay.
You know?
924
00:38:33.412 --> 00:38:36.479
And... I always wanted
to come to New York.
925
00:38:36.515 --> 00:38:38.381
I've been talking about it
since I was a kid,
926
00:38:38.417 --> 00:38:40.417
and I met Jill a few years ago,
927
00:38:40.452 --> 00:38:42.619
and she said
she'd come with me.
928
00:38:42.654 --> 00:38:44.688
I thought it would help,
you know?
929
00:38:44.723 --> 00:38:47.624
To make peace with some stuff.
930
00:38:50.729 --> 00:38:52.429
I feel like what
we're doing today,
931
00:38:52.464 --> 00:38:54.631
it was the exact way
I wanted to see the city.
932
00:38:54.666 --> 00:38:56.411
I mean, I could have
kept going for hours.
933
00:38:56.435 --> 00:38:58.601
I just...
934
00:38:58.637 --> 00:39:00.581
There's stuff on Jill's list
that she wants to see,
935
00:39:00.605 --> 00:39:02.572
and I want to make her happy.
936
00:39:02.607 --> 00:39:05.642
- Is she hard to make happy?
- No.
937
00:39:05.677 --> 00:39:08.712
She's actually wonderful.
938
00:39:08.747 --> 00:39:11.481
Honestly, I don't know
how I would have gotten through
939
00:39:11.516 --> 00:39:12.593
the last few years without her.
940
00:39:14.653 --> 00:39:17.620
She wants to get married.
941
00:39:17.656 --> 00:39:20.356
I want to marry her.
I-I'd love to.
942
00:39:20.392 --> 00:39:22.659
I... I don't know
if I can marry anyone.
943
00:39:22.694 --> 00:39:25.361
♪
944
00:39:25.397 --> 00:39:30.500
I was married before, and...
945
00:39:30.535 --> 00:39:32.702
- Um, what was she like?
946
00:39:32.738 --> 00:39:34.637
Your wife.
947
00:39:34.673 --> 00:39:38.508
- She was...
948
00:39:38.543 --> 00:39:41.478
She was...
- Guys, so weird.
949
00:39:41.513 --> 00:39:43.424
I just saw the guy who was
in that movie, you know,
950
00:39:43.448 --> 00:39:44.659
where all of his friends
try to stop him
951
00:39:44.683 --> 00:39:46.483
from marrying the wrong girl?
952
00:39:48.787 --> 00:39:50.653
Oh, he had that...
He had old sitcom on TV
953
00:39:50.689 --> 00:39:52.622
where he played a guy
living in New York
954
00:39:52.657 --> 00:39:54.635
with his three friends.
- You literally just described
955
00:39:54.659 --> 00:39:55.692
every old sitcom.
956
00:39:55.727 --> 00:39:57.460
- She's talking about
Jason Biggs.
957
00:39:57.496 --> 00:39:58.628
- Yes!
- Oh!
958
00:39:58.663 --> 00:40:01.498
There she is.
959
00:40:01.533 --> 00:40:03.666
Pyke.
We need to talk.
960
00:40:13.678 --> 00:40:14.744
You can't do this.
961
00:40:14.780 --> 00:40:16.679
- I'm not doing anything.
962
00:40:16.715 --> 00:40:18.681
I ran into him,
and I haven't lost any points.
963
00:40:18.717 --> 00:40:20.550
I've been checking.
- Yet.
964
00:40:20.585 --> 00:40:21.696
But it's only
a matter of time.
965
00:40:21.720 --> 00:40:23.686
No one is paying
any attention today,
966
00:40:23.722 --> 00:40:25.466
because most of the bigwigs
are at a birthday party.
967
00:40:25.490 --> 00:40:26.756
- Oh, right.
Birthday.
968
00:40:26.792 --> 00:40:28.725
Christmas.
Yeah, that makes sense.
969
00:40:28.760 --> 00:40:30.760
- Hi. Could you please
wrap this up for me?
970
00:40:30.796 --> 00:40:32.662
- Huh?
Oh, no, no.
971
00:40:32.697 --> 00:40:34.664
Not, um... not him.
It's also
972
00:40:34.699 --> 00:40:36.800
this angel Carl's birthday.
He's a real sweetheart.
973
00:40:36.835 --> 00:40:38.434
It's actually
a laser tag party.
974
00:40:38.470 --> 00:40:39.736
That's not the point.
975
00:40:39.771 --> 00:40:41.449
They are going to find out
up there if you do not
976
00:40:41.473 --> 00:40:42.806
get rid of them right now.
977
00:40:42.841 --> 00:40:44.707
- I'm handling it.
- You are not handling it.
978
00:40:44.743 --> 00:40:46.476
You are the opposite
of handling it.
979
00:40:46.511 --> 00:40:49.679
That's Jason Biggs over there.
980
00:40:49.714 --> 00:40:52.482
- If you say one word
to either of them
981
00:40:52.517 --> 00:40:55.752
about who you really are
or what you do,
982
00:40:55.787 --> 00:40:57.720
I'm authorized to take
all your points away.
983
00:40:57.756 --> 00:41:02.392
- But you wouldn't do that...
because we are friends.
984
00:41:02.427 --> 00:41:04.727
Okay, look.
985
00:41:04.763 --> 00:41:08.765
When I was being directed
by Woody... Allen...
986
00:41:08.800 --> 00:41:11.668
- What other Woody could it be?
- I was having trouble
987
00:41:11.703 --> 00:41:12.669
on a scene.
You know what he told me?
988
00:41:12.704 --> 00:41:15.705
He said, "Jason.
Jason...
989
00:41:15.740 --> 00:41:18.741
"You are here to do a job,
990
00:41:18.777 --> 00:41:21.511
"and all you have to remember
991
00:41:21.546 --> 00:41:25.515
is to Do. That. Job."
992
00:41:25.550 --> 00:41:28.484
Understand?
993
00:41:28.520 --> 00:41:30.720
See them on their way.
994
00:41:30.755 --> 00:41:33.790
If you don't...
995
00:41:33.825 --> 00:41:35.558
I can't help you.
996
00:41:38.597 --> 00:41:43.600
♪
997
00:41:43.635 --> 00:41:45.702
- Okay, uh, change of plans.
998
00:41:45.737 --> 00:41:49.505
I am sending you guys off
to the Upper West Side.
999
00:41:49.541 --> 00:41:51.541
- Really? Are you sure?
I thought we...
1000
00:41:51.576 --> 00:41:54.677
- Can we... can we get
a picture with Mr. Biggs?
1001
00:41:54.713 --> 00:41:56.646
- Sure, of course.
Yeah.
1002
00:41:56.681 --> 00:41:58.514
But, you know,
why don't we take it outside?
1003
00:41:58.550 --> 00:41:59.727
The light's much
better out there,
1004
00:41:59.751 --> 00:42:02.685
and that way
I can hail you a cab.
1005
00:42:02.721 --> 00:42:05.555
- Okay.
1006
00:42:05.590 --> 00:42:07.490
- Say good-bye to your friends.
1007
00:42:07.525 --> 00:42:09.559
♪
1008
00:42:11.763 --> 00:42:13.696
Bye, Patrick.
1009
00:42:13.732 --> 00:42:15.698
♪
1010
00:42:15.734 --> 00:42:17.467
- Bye, Pyke.
1011
00:42:19.738 --> 00:42:21.771
- Bye, Jill.
1012
00:42:21.806 --> 00:42:24.774
- Okay, losing light.
- Whoo-hoo!
1013
00:42:24.809 --> 00:42:28.478
♪
1014
00:42:32.817 --> 00:42:35.718
- Hey, Pyke.
If I sound happy right now,
1015
00:42:35.754 --> 00:42:37.732
it's because I've been
sampling my homemade eggnog.
1016
00:42:37.756 --> 00:42:40.723
Don't tell anyone, but I added
a secret ingredient:
1017
00:42:40.759 --> 00:42:43.493
Maple syrup.
It's delicious.
1018
00:42:43.528 --> 00:42:45.561
We're drinking it tonight.
You're missing out.
1019
00:42:52.604 --> 00:42:56.439
♪
1020
00:42:56.474 --> 00:42:59.509
- I got the cab to stop because
I forgot my leftover soup.
1021
00:42:59.544 --> 00:43:00.710
Yeah.
1022
00:43:00.745 --> 00:43:04.514
You know, it really
is quite good.
1023
00:43:04.549 --> 00:43:07.550
- Oh, hey, hon,
maybe we ask Pyke.
1024
00:43:07.585 --> 00:43:08.729
Do you know the best place
in New York
1025
00:43:08.753 --> 00:43:10.653
to get a glass of eggnog?
1026
00:43:10.689 --> 00:43:15.692
♪
1027
00:43:15.727 --> 00:43:18.628
- I actually know
the perfect place.
1028
00:43:18.663 --> 00:43:21.564
How would you guys like to have
a genuine Christmas dinner
1029
00:43:21.599 --> 00:43:24.467
with the best homemade eggnog
1030
00:43:24.502 --> 00:43:25.535
you have ever tasted?
1031
00:43:25.570 --> 00:43:26.736
It's got maple syrup in it.
1032
00:43:29.607 --> 00:43:32.542
- We'd love to.
Thank you, yeah.
1033
00:43:32.577 --> 00:43:33.743
- Great.
1034
00:43:33.778 --> 00:43:36.446
This is gonna be great.
1035
00:43:38.767 --> 00:43:40.800
[Johnny Staton's
"Ride
1036
00:43:40.835 --> 00:43:42.935
♪
1037
00:43:42.971 --> 00:43:45.605
- When you guys try this
eggnog, you are going to flip.
1038
00:43:45.640 --> 00:43:46.939
- Are you sure that the host
1039
00:43:46.975 --> 00:43:49.742
didn't want us
to bring anything?
1040
00:43:49.778 --> 00:43:51.778
- We did.
Soup.
1041
00:43:51.813 --> 00:43:55.581
- ♪ Laid in my bed
and I didn't say a word ♪
1042
00:43:55.617 --> 00:43:56.861
Barker! Hey, Connie.
- ♪ I just pretend
1043
00:43:56.885 --> 00:43:58.651
♪ That you wasn't heard
- Pyke?
1044
00:43:58.687 --> 00:44:00.553
I can't believe
you actually came.
1045
00:44:00.588 --> 00:44:02.588
- We brought soup.
She already ate half of it.
1046
00:44:02.624 --> 00:44:03.856
- Oh, soup.
Hey.
1047
00:44:03.892 --> 00:44:05.792
Who'd you bring with you?
1048
00:44:05.827 --> 00:44:08.628
- These are two
Christmas orphans I found.
1049
00:44:08.663 --> 00:44:10.730
This is Patrick.
He is the best.
1050
00:44:10.765 --> 00:44:14.534
I totally vouch for him.
And that's Jill.
1051
00:44:14.569 --> 00:44:15.802
- Great.
The more, the merrier.
1052
00:44:15.837 --> 00:44:18.604
Well, I'll just get
a few more chairs in here.
1053
00:44:18.640 --> 00:44:21.674
No problem at all.
Guys, these are Pyke's friends.
1054
00:44:21.710 --> 00:44:23.609
- Yeah, let's go with friends.
1055
00:44:23.645 --> 00:44:24.911
- Guys.
- And, of course,
1056
00:44:24.946 --> 00:44:26.779
Wendell, Gwendolyn.
- Hi.
1057
00:44:26.815 --> 00:44:28.648
- You know Pyke.
- Patrick, I promised
1058
00:44:28.683 --> 00:44:29.916
you eggnog.
Hey, Connie.
1059
00:44:29.951 --> 00:44:32.652
- Hi, honey.
- Oh, God, I hate this song.
1060
00:44:32.687 --> 00:44:33.764
- No!
1061
00:44:33.788 --> 00:44:36.556
- Wow, Barker.
You really went all out.
1062
00:44:36.591 --> 00:44:37.868
You cooked up a feast.
- Oh, come on.
1063
00:44:37.892 --> 00:44:39.859
It was no big deal.
1064
00:44:39.894 --> 00:44:41.739
- I didn't realize you were
like the male Martha Stewart.
1065
00:44:41.763 --> 00:44:43.596
- I prefer male Julia Child,
1066
00:44:43.631 --> 00:44:44.809
but there's a lot
you don't know about me
1067
00:44:44.833 --> 00:44:45.932
besides my first name.
1068
00:44:45.967 --> 00:44:47.800
- Barker is better
and you know it.
1069
00:44:47.836 --> 00:44:49.836
- Hey, so no big deal,
1070
00:44:49.871 --> 00:44:51.771
but... I got you
a little something,
1071
00:44:51.806 --> 00:44:53.740
because I had a feeling
you'd show up.
1072
00:44:53.775 --> 00:44:55.808
Merry Christmas.
1073
00:44:55.844 --> 00:44:58.745
- ♪ Ain't got
no funny feeling ♪
1074
00:44:58.780 --> 00:45:02.715
♪ To be without you
1075
00:45:02.751 --> 00:45:04.751
- It's pretty special, right?
1076
00:45:04.786 --> 00:45:06.886
- I could use it now.
1077
00:45:06.921 --> 00:45:11.524
♪
1078
00:45:11.559 --> 00:45:13.659
- Oh. You know,
there's rum in that already.
1079
00:45:13.695 --> 00:45:14.894
- Not enough.
1080
00:45:14.929 --> 00:45:16.829
Merry Christmas, Barker.
1081
00:45:16.865 --> 00:45:19.532
- Okay.
1082
00:45:19.567 --> 00:45:20.811
- Yeah...
- You are going to love it.
1083
00:45:20.835 --> 00:45:22.769
- Thank you.
1084
00:45:22.804 --> 00:45:24.570
- ♪ Ain't got
no funny feeling ♪
1085
00:45:24.606 --> 00:45:25.806
♪ Ain't got no funny feeling
1086
00:45:25.840 --> 00:45:28.574
- I'll be right be back, okay?
Cheers.
1087
00:45:28.610 --> 00:45:31.544
♪
1088
00:45:31.579 --> 00:45:33.557
Please tell me it's not gonna
be that kind of night.
1089
00:45:33.581 --> 00:45:34.859
- Look, I am spinning a lot
of plates right now,
1090
00:45:34.883 --> 00:45:36.716
and I spin better
when I'm drunk.
1091
00:45:36.751 --> 00:45:38.584
- Yeah, but who saved
who, really?
1092
00:45:38.620 --> 00:45:40.787
Who are your new friends?
1093
00:45:40.822 --> 00:45:43.689
- Honestly, just some randos.
1094
00:45:43.725 --> 00:45:46.626
Jill... she does not seem
good enough for Patrick, right?
1095
00:45:46.661 --> 00:45:47.838
- But it's nice.
- Nothing that we've planned
1096
00:45:47.862 --> 00:45:49.695
has happened today.
1097
00:45:49.731 --> 00:45:50.941
- Just spontaneity, you know?
Spice of life, right?
1098
00:45:50.965 --> 00:45:53.599
- Oh, my God.
1099
00:45:53.635 --> 00:45:55.735
You like that guy.
1100
00:45:55.770 --> 00:45:57.804
And you brought him
and his girlfriend
1101
00:45:57.839 --> 00:45:59.839
to Barker's party?
- What? No.
1102
00:45:59.874 --> 00:46:01.852
Look, I just think there's
something off about Jill.
1103
00:46:01.876 --> 00:46:04.510
I mean, look at her.
- Nutmeg, I guess.
1104
00:46:04.546 --> 00:46:05.778
Do you see what
1105
00:46:05.814 --> 00:46:07.647
I'm talking about?
- You're not even playing
1106
00:46:07.682 --> 00:46:09.682
with fire right now, Pyke.
You're already engulfed
1107
00:46:09.717 --> 00:46:12.752
in flames.
Are you even listening to me?
1108
00:46:14.589 --> 00:46:17.757
♪
1109
00:46:19.861 --> 00:46:22.628
- Cheers.
- Merry Christmas.
1110
00:46:22.664 --> 00:46:25.665
- All right, everybody.
I just want to say how grateful
1111
00:46:25.700 --> 00:46:28.734
I am to all of you... old friends
and new friends alike...
1112
00:46:28.770 --> 00:46:31.871
For spending your
Christmas Eves at my place.
1113
00:46:31.906 --> 00:46:33.806
- Mm!
- My family has a tradition
1114
00:46:33.842 --> 00:46:36.709
at Christmas.
We go around the table,
1115
00:46:36.744 --> 00:46:38.611
and everybody says
what they were grateful for
1116
00:46:38.646 --> 00:46:39.812
in the past year,
1117
00:46:39.848 --> 00:46:42.748
and what they are hopeful
for in the new year.
1118
00:46:42.784 --> 00:46:44.684
- Then what do you do
on Thanksgiving?
1119
00:46:44.719 --> 00:46:47.687
Exchange gifts under a tree?
Boom! Barker family burn.
1120
00:46:49.691 --> 00:46:51.757
- Well, Pyke,
since mine's about you,
1121
00:46:51.793 --> 00:46:54.760
I guess I'll go first.
1122
00:46:54.796 --> 00:47:00.633
You are challenging,
secretive, and elusive,
1123
00:47:00.668 --> 00:47:02.869
but getting a chance
to know you,
1124
00:47:02.904 --> 00:47:06.873
despite your best efforts,
has... been the thing
1125
00:47:06.908 --> 00:47:10.676
that I am most grateful
for this past year.
1126
00:47:10.712 --> 00:47:13.779
And what I'm most looking
forward to in the new year
1127
00:47:13.815 --> 00:47:19.785
is what it brings
for you... and for us.
1128
00:47:19.821 --> 00:47:23.789
- Oh, that is so cute, Barker.
1129
00:47:23.825 --> 00:47:26.626
Okay! Me next?
1130
00:47:26.661 --> 00:47:29.662
It's not really my thing.
Can we just... skip my turn?
1131
00:47:29.697 --> 00:47:31.797
I'll go next.
1132
00:47:31.833 --> 00:47:33.900
- Mm.
- Thank you, again, Barker,
1133
00:47:33.935 --> 00:47:37.904
for inviting me to this dinner.
My family lives far away,
1134
00:47:37.939 --> 00:47:39.906
but I also like to think
of some of you
1135
00:47:39.941 --> 00:47:43.709
as family... even you, Pyke.
Well, on a good day.
1136
00:47:43.745 --> 00:47:45.778
That's it.
1137
00:47:45.813 --> 00:47:47.780
- Um...
1138
00:47:47.815 --> 00:47:49.782
I think I need
another minute.
1139
00:47:49.817 --> 00:47:51.651
Could you go?
1140
00:47:51.686 --> 00:47:53.619
- Okay.
1141
00:47:53.655 --> 00:47:56.756
Well...
1142
00:47:56.791 --> 00:48:00.693
three years ago, I was...
I was in a really bad place.
1143
00:48:00.728 --> 00:48:05.531
Um... and then I met this man...
1144
00:48:05.600 --> 00:48:07.667
- In a grief support group...
1145
00:48:07.702 --> 00:48:10.770
because my fiancé...
1146
00:48:10.805 --> 00:48:13.773
died in a car accident.
1147
00:48:13.808 --> 00:48:16.542
Stewart.
1148
00:48:16.578 --> 00:48:17.610
- Oh, honey.
- No.
1149
00:48:17.645 --> 00:48:18.744
You can't start liking her.
1150
00:48:18.780 --> 00:48:20.746
That's what she wants us to do.
1151
00:48:20.782 --> 00:48:23.649
- So first,
we got really close,
1152
00:48:23.685 --> 00:48:25.763
because, you know, we were both
going through so much,
1153
00:48:25.787 --> 00:48:29.855
but then we...
we really... fell in love.
1154
00:48:29.891 --> 00:48:34.560
I mean, he is
so sweet and kind,
1155
00:48:34.596 --> 00:48:38.664
and he's always so excited
about everything.
1156
00:48:38.700 --> 00:48:40.800
And, um...
1157
00:48:40.835 --> 00:48:43.736
he taught me that
life is for living.
1158
00:48:43.771 --> 00:48:47.607
So thank you, Pat.
1159
00:48:50.678 --> 00:48:52.745
♪
1160
00:48:52.780 --> 00:48:55.748
- I'm Pat.
1161
00:48:55.783 --> 00:48:56.860
Also one of
the total strangers
1162
00:48:56.884 --> 00:48:59.719
who just walked in
on Christmas Eve dinner.
1163
00:49:00.855 --> 00:49:02.655
Uh, but this isn't the weirdest
1164
00:49:02.690 --> 00:49:04.624
situation I've found myself in,
1165
00:49:04.659 --> 00:49:06.659
though, on Christmas Eve.
I, uh...
1166
00:49:06.694 --> 00:49:09.729
I was married before.
1167
00:49:09.764 --> 00:49:12.531
I knew her my whole life.
1168
00:49:12.567 --> 00:49:14.734
I proposed by, um...
1169
00:49:14.769 --> 00:49:17.770
I put a ring in a dumpling.
1170
00:49:20.742 --> 00:49:23.576
She swallowed it, naturally,
1171
00:49:25.780 --> 00:49:29.615
And then, um...
she made me swallow my ring
1172
00:49:29.651 --> 00:49:31.651
so we could be even.
1173
00:49:31.686 --> 00:49:33.653
Then we spent
that Christmas Eve
1174
00:49:33.688 --> 00:49:36.856
in the emergency room.
1175
00:49:36.891 --> 00:49:40.559
It was never my dream
to come to New York.
1176
00:49:40.595 --> 00:49:43.696
It was Megan's.
1177
00:49:43.731 --> 00:49:47.733
And I'm thankful
to you, Jill...
1178
00:49:47.769 --> 00:49:51.837
and to you, Pyke,
who I just met today...
1179
00:49:51.873 --> 00:49:55.708
for letting me have, today...
1180
00:49:55.743 --> 00:49:58.611
one-one last day for Megan.
1181
00:49:58.646 --> 00:50:00.613
Thank you all.
1182
00:50:05.720 --> 00:50:09.889
- That was a really sad story
about your wife who died.
1183
00:50:09.924 --> 00:50:13.793
She sounds cool.
1184
00:50:13.828 --> 00:50:15.695
I was married once before too.
1185
00:50:18.599 --> 00:50:21.867
I was happy.
I loved someone.
1186
00:50:21.903 --> 00:50:26.639
I also knew him my whole life.
1187
00:50:26.674 --> 00:50:29.742
He liked "Dr. Who,"
especially those old episodes
1188
00:50:29.777 --> 00:50:33.746
where the sets were
still made out cardboard.
1189
00:50:33.781 --> 00:50:37.783
He also loved Bowie
and Iggy and the Beatles,
1190
00:50:37.819 --> 00:50:39.652
but his favorite Beatle
was George,
1191
00:50:39.687 --> 00:50:42.788
because he didn't make
a big deal about it.
1192
00:50:42.824 --> 00:50:45.691
We couldn't afford
expensive Christmas gifts,
1193
00:50:45.727 --> 00:50:50.763
so... we would buy the worst
gifts we could find...
1194
00:50:50.798 --> 00:50:53.899
Like used orthopedic shoes,
1195
00:50:53.935 --> 00:50:57.636
or... cans of iguana food.
1196
00:50:57.672 --> 00:51:00.740
Bad stuff.
1197
00:51:00.775 --> 00:51:02.908
But we loved it.
1198
00:51:02.944 --> 00:51:05.911
We were happy.
1199
00:51:05.947 --> 00:51:07.925
You know, and I always said
that I was gonna leave,
1200
00:51:07.949 --> 00:51:12.651
but... I never meant that
I was gonna leave him.
1201
00:51:12.687 --> 00:51:13.897
Whenever I thought
about leaving, you know,
1202
00:51:13.921 --> 00:51:17.757
I thought it was something
we were gonna do together.
1203
00:51:17.792 --> 00:51:19.825
So it does suck.
1204
00:51:19.861 --> 00:51:22.795
And it's not fair.
1205
00:51:22.830 --> 00:51:24.764
I didn't want to go.
1206
00:51:26.868 --> 00:51:29.802
I don't want to be here.
1207
00:51:32.940 --> 00:51:35.775
- I'm sorry, uh, I just...
I need a minute.
1208
00:51:39.647 --> 00:51:40.679
- Excuse me.
1209
00:51:43.618 --> 00:51:44.784
- Let's clear the table.
1210
00:51:51.959 --> 00:51:54.827
Okay, look, I have tried
to be understanding,
1211
00:51:54.862 --> 00:51:56.862
but what the hell
is going on here?
1212
00:51:56.898 --> 00:51:59.698
You were married?
You invite these people
1213
00:51:59.734 --> 00:52:01.801
to my place?
- I wish I could tell you,
1214
00:52:01.836 --> 00:52:03.836
but you just wouldn't
understand.
1215
00:52:03.871 --> 00:52:06.639
- Try me.
All right? I meant what I said.
1216
00:52:06.674 --> 00:52:08.774
I need you to share with me.
Please.
1217
00:52:08.810 --> 00:52:10.810
- Look, okay, I do have
something to share.
1218
00:52:10.845 --> 00:52:14.647
I am leaving forever
in a day and a half.
1219
00:52:16.584 --> 00:52:18.551
- Well, that's great, Pyke.
1220
00:52:18.586 --> 00:52:19.718
I'm glad.
1221
00:52:19.754 --> 00:52:20.820
Merry Christmas.
1222
00:52:23.624 --> 00:52:25.658
- How's he doing?
- Um...
1223
00:52:25.693 --> 00:52:27.660
he just needs
some time alone.
1224
00:52:27.695 --> 00:52:28.894
He... he can get like this.
1225
00:52:28.930 --> 00:52:31.697
You know,
Christmas makes him emotional.
1226
00:52:31.732 --> 00:52:33.699
- Yeah, he's not the only one.
1227
00:52:52.720 --> 00:52:54.820
Hi.
- Hi.
1228
00:52:59.760 --> 00:53:04.697
I'm gonna get into so
much trouble telling you this.
1229
00:53:04.732 --> 00:53:06.832
And I shouldn't.
1230
00:53:06.868 --> 00:53:09.535
I shouldn't be here.
I should have...
1231
00:53:09.570 --> 00:53:10.914
I should have let you leave.
I should have never
1232
00:53:10.938 --> 00:53:12.705
talked to you.
1233
00:53:15.910 --> 00:53:17.877
Why do you think I know
everything about you?
1234
00:53:17.912 --> 00:53:20.813
- Yeah...
1235
00:53:20.848 --> 00:53:25.551
are you an identity thief
or a... a genius hacker?
1236
00:53:25.586 --> 00:53:27.720
A con artist?
1237
00:53:27.755 --> 00:53:29.688
And what am I conning
you out of?
1238
00:53:29.724 --> 00:53:31.790
Your credit card debt?
Your sweet job
1239
00:53:31.826 --> 00:53:33.759
at your dad's tire store?
1240
00:53:33.794 --> 00:53:36.562
- How do you know that?
Okay, just tell me
1241
00:53:36.597 --> 00:53:39.865
who you are, please.
1242
00:53:39.901 --> 00:53:40.901
- It's me.
1243
00:53:43.638 --> 00:53:45.804
It's Megan.
1244
00:53:50.912 --> 00:53:52.745
- Why are you doing this to me?
1245
00:53:54.815 --> 00:53:57.783
Megan's dead!
- Look, I died,
1246
00:53:57.818 --> 00:54:00.819
but I came back
in this body and this city,
1247
00:54:00.855 --> 00:54:03.589
and I've been
stuck here ever since.
1248
00:54:03.624 --> 00:54:05.591
I've been trying to get up
there for nine years,
1249
00:54:05.626 --> 00:54:09.695
but... now I'm screwing that up.
1250
00:54:09.730 --> 00:54:11.830
But I had to tell you.
1251
00:54:11.866 --> 00:54:14.833
Do you believe me?
- No. This is insane.
1252
00:54:14.869 --> 00:54:16.735
- Patrick, it's me.
1253
00:54:18.940 --> 00:54:22.708
- If you're telling the truth...
And I feel like an idiot
1254
00:54:22.743 --> 00:54:25.744
for even contemplating it,
but...
1255
00:54:25.780 --> 00:54:29.815
you were here the whole time?
1256
00:54:29.850 --> 00:54:31.850
I needed you.
1257
00:54:31.886 --> 00:54:34.753
- I couldn't see you.
1258
00:54:34.789 --> 00:54:36.855
Look, it's unfair, but
the Universe has these rules.
1259
00:54:36.891 --> 00:54:38.791
- Megan never cared
about the rules.
1260
00:54:38.826 --> 00:54:41.560
- Well, I'm breaking
all of them now.
1261
00:54:41.595 --> 00:54:45.564
Patrick, it's me.
It's Megan.
1262
00:54:45.599 --> 00:54:47.800
You know it's me.
1263
00:54:50.972 --> 00:54:53.906
- I came on this trip...
1264
00:54:53.941 --> 00:54:57.609
so I could move on.
1265
00:54:57.645 --> 00:54:59.778
So I could
be happy with Jill.
1266
00:55:02.883 --> 00:55:06.719
But it's been so hard,
because I love you.
1267
00:55:12.927 --> 00:55:15.761
Her.
1268
00:55:29.944 --> 00:55:31.744
- Pat...
1269
00:55:36.884 --> 00:55:37.916
- Jill!
Jill, wait!
1270
00:55:47.778 --> 00:55:54.783
♪
1271
00:55:59.724 --> 00:56:03.726
- Excuse me... um, do you know
how long I've been here?
1272
00:56:03.761 --> 00:56:06.729
- You're in luck, 'cause
I spend my Christmas morning
1273
00:56:06.764 --> 00:56:09.665
watching drunk, messed-up girls
sleeping on the subway
1274
00:56:09.700 --> 00:56:13.635
with a stopwatch,
just in case they need to know.
1275
00:56:13.671 --> 00:56:15.471
- A simple no would
have been enough.
1276
00:56:18.676 --> 00:56:23.712
♪
1277
00:56:23.748 --> 00:56:27.616
- ♪ Dashing through the snow
1278
00:56:27.651 --> 00:56:29.618
- Oh, crap.
1279
00:56:29.653 --> 00:56:32.721
- ♪ In a one-horse
open sleigh ♪
1280
00:56:32.757 --> 00:56:35.391
- ♪ Over the fields we go
1281
00:56:35.426 --> 00:56:37.626
Oh, sorry... will you...
1282
00:56:37.661 --> 00:56:39.439
- ♪ Laughing all the way
- Could you just excuse me?
1283
00:56:39.463 --> 00:56:40.707
Let's just take five.
1284
00:56:40.731 --> 00:56:44.400
Well, well, well.
Look who's alive.
1285
00:56:44.435 --> 00:56:46.502
Merry Christmas
from Hollywood...
1286
00:56:46.537 --> 00:56:48.437
Well, actually I'm
in Vancouver,
1287
00:56:48.472 --> 00:56:49.405
hosting a Christmas Day
telethon.
1288
00:56:49.440 --> 00:56:50.672
I'm wearing a mustache!
1289
00:56:50.708 --> 00:56:51.785
- Do you know what happened
last night?
1290
00:56:51.809 --> 00:56:53.709
- Before you ruined everyone
1291
00:56:53.744 --> 00:56:55.711
who cares about you's life
or after?
1292
00:56:55.746 --> 00:56:57.446
- After.
1293
00:56:57.481 --> 00:56:59.481
- You passed out,
you got in a cab,
1294
00:56:59.517 --> 00:57:00.660
but then you threw up
in that cab,
1295
00:57:00.684 --> 00:57:02.484
so you called another cab,
1296
00:57:02.520 --> 00:57:03.730
but then you kicked the driver
in the shin and told him
1297
00:57:03.754 --> 00:57:05.621
he was an instrument
of the patriarchy.
1298
00:57:05.656 --> 00:57:07.389
- Do you know
I lost 5,000 points?
1299
00:57:07.425 --> 00:57:09.391
- Yeah, well, you're lucky
1300
00:57:09.427 --> 00:57:11.527
the powers that be
didn't take away
1301
00:57:11.562 --> 00:57:13.695
all of your points,
thanks to me.
1302
00:57:13.731 --> 00:57:16.698
- Thank you, Jason.
- You're welcome.
1303
00:57:16.734 --> 00:57:19.668
Seriously, they wanted to take
away every last point of yours
1304
00:57:19.703 --> 00:57:21.670
that you have earned
this whole time.
1305
00:57:21.705 --> 00:57:24.440
I begged them not to.
1306
00:57:24.475 --> 00:57:27.476
So now you only have to make up
5,000 points by tomorrow.
1307
00:57:27.511 --> 00:57:29.445
I'm a hero.
- Wait, it took me years
1308
00:57:29.480 --> 00:57:31.691
to get to 5,000; how am I
supposed to do that in one day?
1309
00:57:31.715 --> 00:57:33.682
- I don't know.
1310
00:57:33.717 --> 00:57:36.618
It's Christmas, Pike.
There's people everywhere.
1311
00:57:36.654 --> 00:57:38.454
Pick one.
- Well, that's what I've been
1312
00:57:38.489 --> 00:57:41.490
trying to do for years.
Any other ideas?
1313
00:57:41.525 --> 00:57:44.460
- Well, you know, you did make
quite the mess last night.
1314
00:57:44.495 --> 00:57:46.695
I would imagine there are
some points to be earned in,
1315
00:57:46.730 --> 00:57:48.730
you know, cleaning it all up.
1316
00:57:48.766 --> 00:57:52.468
- Yeah, but they
all hate me now.
1317
00:57:52.503 --> 00:57:55.504
I don't blame them.
1318
00:57:55.539 --> 00:57:57.639
How can I ever repair
all that damage I've done?
1319
00:57:57.675 --> 00:58:01.577
- I don't know, but I know
that you can try.
1320
00:58:01.612 --> 00:58:03.445
- Do you really think
I could do it?
1321
00:58:03.481 --> 00:58:05.647
- I really don't.
Got to go.
1322
00:58:11.689 --> 00:58:13.655
♪
1323
00:58:13.691 --> 00:58:17.392
- ♪ Have yourself a holiday
1324
00:58:17.428 --> 00:58:19.695
♪ A happy day
1325
00:58:19.730 --> 00:58:23.465
- Hey, Connie.
1326
00:58:23.501 --> 00:58:25.434
Was I really that bad
last night?
1327
00:58:25.469 --> 00:58:26.680
- I don't like to judge people.
1328
00:58:26.704 --> 00:58:28.504
- Are you kidding?
You love to judge people.
1329
00:58:28.539 --> 00:58:31.406
We love to judge people.
It's why we're friends.
1330
00:58:31.442 --> 00:58:34.676
We invented that game...
"daughter or girlfriend?"
1331
00:58:34.712 --> 00:58:36.478
Table seven, daughter.
1332
00:58:36.514 --> 00:58:37.679
- Girlfriend.
- Daughter.
1333
00:58:37.715 --> 00:58:39.381
Definitely girlfriend.
1334
00:58:39.416 --> 00:58:40.616
It's always the girlfriend.
1335
00:58:40.651 --> 00:58:43.552
The truth is, you were awful
last night...
1336
00:58:43.587 --> 00:58:45.454
The worst I've ever seen.
1337
00:58:45.489 --> 00:58:47.489
- I want to make it right.
Look, is Barker here?
1338
00:58:47.525 --> 00:58:48.757
- No, he took today off.
1339
00:58:48.792 --> 00:58:51.660
You know, I really think
that you should let him be.
1340
00:58:51.695 --> 00:58:54.730
You broke his heart last night.
I warned him about you.
1341
00:58:54.765 --> 00:58:56.598
I said you were like
a pet chimp.
1342
00:58:56.634 --> 00:58:58.433
You know, like cute at first,
but eventually,
1343
00:58:58.469 --> 00:58:59.679
they're just gonna
rip your face off,
1344
00:58:59.703 --> 00:59:02.404
like what happened
to that woman in Florida.
1345
00:59:02.439 --> 00:59:04.373
- Thank you for that.
1346
00:59:04.408 --> 00:59:08.377
- You are a terrible waitress
and a bad friend,
1347
00:59:08.412 --> 00:59:09.623
but I kept you
on this whole time
1348
00:59:09.647 --> 00:59:12.347
because I thought
you could change.
1349
00:59:12.383 --> 00:59:14.550
- Connie, look,
don't give up on me now.
1350
00:59:14.585 --> 00:59:18.420
Please?
Look, I got you something,
1351
00:59:18.455 --> 00:59:20.489
but you have to come over
the bar to get it.
1352
00:59:20.524 --> 00:59:22.391
Come on.
You're gonna love it.
1353
00:59:22.426 --> 00:59:24.426
Get over here.
- No, I'm busy.
1354
00:59:24.461 --> 00:59:26.428
- Jake, turn up
the Christmas carols!
1355
00:59:29.466 --> 00:59:31.633
♪
1356
00:59:31.669 --> 00:59:33.569
♪ On the first day
of Christmas ♪
1357
00:59:33.604 --> 00:59:36.438
- Merry Christmas.
It's a pear tree.
1358
00:59:36.473 --> 00:59:38.473
- ♪ A partridge
in a pear tree ♪
1359
00:59:38.509 --> 00:59:40.742
- How did you track down
a pear tree on Christmas Day?
1360
00:59:40.778 --> 00:59:43.745
- Through the miracle
of Craigslist.
1361
00:59:43.781 --> 00:59:45.647
I thought you could use
something to remind you
1362
00:59:45.683 --> 00:59:47.549
of your grandma.
The tree should sprout
1363
00:59:47.585 --> 00:59:49.451
in about six to eight months,
1364
00:59:49.486 --> 00:59:51.753
so until then...
they're organic.
1365
00:59:51.789 --> 00:59:53.589
- ♪ On the third day
of Christmas ♪
1366
00:59:53.624 --> 00:59:55.424
- There may be a half-eaten one
in there.
1367
00:59:55.459 --> 00:59:57.459
- Wow.
1368
00:59:57.494 --> 00:59:58.572
Thank you,
you little jerk-face.
1369
00:59:58.596 --> 01:00:00.495
- I'm sorry.
- Oh, it's okay.
1370
01:00:00.531 --> 01:00:02.631
- ♪ A partridge
in a pear tree ♪
1371
01:00:02.666 --> 01:00:04.766
- Look, I wish
I could stay, but...
1372
01:00:04.802 --> 01:00:06.768
I have to make the next stop
on my apology tour.
1373
01:00:06.804 --> 01:00:09.404
- Do you know where he is?
- Barker only does one thing
1374
01:00:09.440 --> 01:00:10.672
on his mornings off.
1375
01:00:13.711 --> 01:00:19.648
♪
1376
01:00:23.787 --> 01:00:26.421
- Fine. What?
1377
01:00:26.457 --> 01:00:28.457
- Well, I...
was gonna do
1378
01:00:28.492 --> 01:00:29.669
this whole dramatic thing
and jog with you
1379
01:00:29.693 --> 01:00:31.627
until you talked to me,
but... I hate running
1380
01:00:31.662 --> 01:00:35.430
and you're fast.
- What do you want, Pyke?
1381
01:00:35.466 --> 01:00:37.699
- I'm sorry.
- Okay, cool.
1382
01:00:37.735 --> 01:00:40.802
- Wait, wait... please?
Look, I want to make
1383
01:00:40.838 --> 01:00:42.704
things right.
What do I need to do
1384
01:00:42.740 --> 01:00:44.706
to get you to forgive me?
Anything, please.
1385
01:00:44.742 --> 01:00:47.676
- You think this is only
about last night?
1386
01:00:47.711 --> 01:00:49.689
- I was always honest with you
about what this was.
1387
01:00:49.713 --> 01:00:51.780
- Honesty from you
just feels mean.
1388
01:00:51.815 --> 01:00:54.650
- Wait... Barker.
I mean...
1389
01:00:54.685 --> 01:00:57.753
You had a weird thing
with a weird girl for a year.
1390
01:00:57.788 --> 01:00:59.621
Believe me,
things could be worse.
1391
01:00:59.657 --> 01:01:02.524
- Not for me.
- What are you talking about?
1392
01:01:05.596 --> 01:01:09.464
- A while back, I got accepted
into a cooking school in Paris.
1393
01:01:09.500 --> 01:01:12.401
And then I met Allison Pyke.
1394
01:01:12.469 --> 01:01:14.581
- You can't put that all on me.
- I only blame myself.
1395
01:01:14.605 --> 01:01:18.473
You were always very up front
about how little you cared.
1396
01:01:18.509 --> 01:01:20.509
Let me ask you something, Pyke.
1397
01:01:20.544 --> 01:01:22.611
Have you ever done
anything... anything at all...
1398
01:01:22.646 --> 01:01:24.613
That was truly
for someone else?
1399
01:01:24.648 --> 01:01:26.660
- Yes... that's actually
the thing I do all the time.
1400
01:01:26.684 --> 01:01:28.583
- No, no, no,
I mean just to be good,
1401
01:01:28.619 --> 01:01:30.519
not for any other reason.
1402
01:01:30.554 --> 01:01:32.421
Not because you expect
something in return.
1403
01:01:32.456 --> 01:01:34.556
Just one selfless act.
1404
01:01:40.531 --> 01:01:42.497
- No.
You're right.
1405
01:01:42.533 --> 01:01:44.499
You are absolutely right.
1406
01:01:44.535 --> 01:01:49.504
I'm... I'm... not a good person.
1407
01:01:49.540 --> 01:01:51.573
But maybe I can be.
1408
01:01:51.608 --> 01:01:53.442
- I don't think you can.
1409
01:01:56.480 --> 01:01:57.679
♪
1410
01:02:02.653 --> 01:02:04.686
♪
1411
01:02:06.724 --> 01:02:13.528
♪
1412
01:02:13.564 --> 01:02:15.731
- Leonard, this one's mine.
- You are too out of shape
1413
01:02:15.766 --> 01:02:17.599
to be making
a decision like that.
1414
01:02:17.634 --> 01:02:19.701
- Okay, no more running.
Please, please.
1415
01:02:19.737 --> 01:02:21.636
Look, we still have a minute.
1416
01:02:21.672 --> 01:02:23.638
- Wait.
Pyke, why are you even here?
1417
01:02:23.674 --> 01:02:25.474
It's not like
you need the points.
1418
01:02:26.777 --> 01:02:31.546
Unless... you screwed it up?
1419
01:02:31.582 --> 01:02:33.715
- I screwed it up.
1420
01:02:33.751 --> 01:02:35.684
- Pyke.
1421
01:02:35.719 --> 01:02:38.587
Listen, I'm just
1,000 points away,
1422
01:02:38.622 --> 01:02:40.589
but I feel bad, 'cause
I stole your last miracle.
1423
01:02:40.624 --> 01:02:42.524
♪
1424
01:02:42.559 --> 01:02:44.593
You can have this one.
1425
01:02:44.628 --> 01:02:48.563
- No, look.
I want you to have it.
1426
01:02:48.599 --> 01:02:50.732
just because angels have to
1427
01:02:50.768 --> 01:02:53.468
help the living doesn't mean
we can't choose
1428
01:02:53.504 --> 01:02:56.438
to help each other.
1429
01:02:56.473 --> 01:02:58.573
- Are you quoting
my angel union email?
1430
01:02:58.609 --> 01:03:02.577
- Yes, and for the record,
you are a terrible writer.
1431
01:03:02.613 --> 01:03:06.648
But... I can't imagine a Heaven
without you in it.
1432
01:03:10.621 --> 01:03:13.421
You're sweet.
1433
01:03:13.457 --> 01:03:16.558
Wait, wait, are you actually
being nice to me,
1434
01:03:16.593 --> 01:03:18.460
or are you just doing this
because you think
1435
01:03:18.495 --> 01:03:19.739
it'll get you more points?
- A little from column A,
1436
01:03:19.763 --> 01:03:22.531
a little from column B.
- Mm-hmm.
1437
01:03:26.737 --> 01:03:28.570
Hey.
1438
01:03:28.605 --> 01:03:30.539
- Excuse me.
I have somewhere to be.
1439
01:03:33.577 --> 01:03:40.549
♪
1440
01:03:53.797 --> 01:03:57.532
- Ooh!
1441
01:03:57.568 --> 01:04:00.468
1,000 points.
1442
01:04:00.504 --> 01:04:02.470
- Stand clear
of the closing doors.
1443
01:04:02.506 --> 01:04:04.372
- Hope I see you up there,
Pyke.
1444
01:04:04.408 --> 01:04:05.740
- Maybe you will.
1445
01:04:05.776 --> 01:04:07.542
- Maybe I will.
1446
01:04:21.491 --> 01:04:26.628
♪
1447
01:04:26.663 --> 01:04:28.663
- ♪ Hark how the bells,
sweet silver bells ♪
1448
01:04:28.699 --> 01:04:30.599
♪ All seem to say,
"Throw cares away" ♪
1449
01:04:30.634 --> 01:04:32.767
♪ Christmas is here,
bringing good cheer ♪
1450
01:04:32.803 --> 01:04:35.503
♪ To young and old,
meek and the bold ♪
1451
01:04:35.539 --> 01:04:36.549
♪ Ding-dong, ding-dong
1452
01:04:36.573 --> 01:04:38.473
♪ That is the song
1453
01:04:38.508 --> 01:04:40.508
♪ With joyful ring,
all caroling ♪
1454
01:04:40.544 --> 01:04:42.444
♪ One seems to hear
words of good cheer ♪
1455
01:04:42.479 --> 01:04:44.479
- ♪ From everywhere,
filling the air ♪
1456
01:04:44.514 --> 01:04:47.649
- Oh. You.
How did you find me?
1457
01:04:47.684 --> 01:04:51.419
- This is literally
the only place I looked.
1458
01:04:51.455 --> 01:04:52.587
Look, can we talk?
1459
01:04:52.623 --> 01:04:54.522
- I'd rather be left alone.
1460
01:04:54.558 --> 01:04:57.525
- Look, I hear you, and I will
totally leave you alone,
1461
01:04:57.561 --> 01:05:01.563
so I will walk...
all the way over here
1462
01:05:01.598 --> 01:05:05.400
as I apologize to you.
1463
01:05:05.435 --> 01:05:08.637
Look, it wasn't Patrick's
fault. It was my fault.
1464
01:05:08.672 --> 01:05:10.572
I kissed him.
He didn't kiss me.
1465
01:05:10.607 --> 01:05:12.474
- I know it was your fault.
1466
01:05:12.509 --> 01:05:14.609
I never thought it was
anybody else's fault.
1467
01:05:14.645 --> 01:05:18.380
You have been lying to me
and Patrick this whole time.
1468
01:05:18.415 --> 01:05:21.683
Could you just be honest
for a moment?
1469
01:05:21.718 --> 01:05:25.620
- I owe it to you to try.
1470
01:05:25.656 --> 01:05:28.590
We dated... a lifetime ago.
1471
01:05:28.625 --> 01:05:31.493
- ♪ Merry, merry, merry,
merry Christmas ♪
1472
01:05:31.528 --> 01:05:35.397
- So long ago that I look
completely different now,
1473
01:05:35.432 --> 01:05:38.466
so he didn't recognize me.
1474
01:05:38.502 --> 01:05:39.646
Look, I didn't tell him
who I was
1475
01:05:39.670 --> 01:05:43.505
because I didn't want
to make things weird,
1476
01:05:43.540 --> 01:05:45.640
which clearly turned out great.
1477
01:05:48.712 --> 01:05:52.514
- Do you... hate me
for some reason?
1478
01:05:52.549 --> 01:05:55.450
- What? No.
I like you.
1479
01:05:55.485 --> 01:05:57.485
I just... I didn't want
to believe
1480
01:05:57.521 --> 01:06:00.355
that there was anyone else
out there good enough for him,
1481
01:06:00.390 --> 01:06:03.491
and the fact that you are
just made it worse.
1482
01:06:05.729 --> 01:06:07.629
Look, he loves you.
1483
01:06:07.664 --> 01:06:11.533
And he's always
gonna love you, Jill.
1484
01:06:11.568 --> 01:06:14.469
- You clearly haven't been
hanging around Patrick lately,
1485
01:06:14.504 --> 01:06:17.572
because the only person
that he loves is Megan.
1486
01:06:17.607 --> 01:06:19.641
- No, he went after
you last night.
1487
01:06:19.676 --> 01:06:23.478
Look, you're the one he wants,
1488
01:06:23.513 --> 01:06:26.581
and he can love more
than one person.
1489
01:06:26.616 --> 01:06:30.552
I mean, you still
love Stewart, right?
1490
01:06:30.587 --> 01:06:33.621
That's what brought you
two together.
1491
01:06:33.657 --> 01:06:36.591
You both have big enough
hearts for that.
1492
01:06:36.626 --> 01:06:38.593
♪
1493
01:06:38.628 --> 01:06:41.696
I'm really happy he found you.
1494
01:06:41.732 --> 01:06:48.670
♪
1495
01:06:50.474 --> 01:06:53.675
You were right.
1496
01:06:53.710 --> 01:06:55.677
This place is beautiful.
1497
01:06:58.482 --> 01:07:01.449
- Do you think he'll ever
be able to move on from her?
1498
01:07:01.485 --> 01:07:04.519
♪
1499
01:07:04.554 --> 01:07:05.587
- I think so.
1500
01:07:27.177 --> 01:07:30.245
We need to talk about things.
1501
01:07:30.280 --> 01:07:31.446
- We do.
1502
01:07:37.554 --> 01:07:41.222
This is where they moved
the giant piano from "Big."
1503
01:07:41.258 --> 01:07:46.327
- I know.
It's why I came.
1504
01:07:46.363 --> 01:07:48.441
Where else would Patrick Dorsey
from Hastings, Nebraska,
1505
01:07:48.465 --> 01:07:50.398
want to go?
1506
01:07:50.434 --> 01:07:53.535
- I figured you'd find me...
1507
01:07:53.570 --> 01:07:57.338
if you're really you.
1508
01:07:57.374 --> 01:07:59.340
- You believe me?
1509
01:07:59.376 --> 01:08:01.376
- I had a feeling
at the beginning,
1510
01:08:01.411 --> 01:08:04.112
but... well, we're from Nebraska.
1511
01:08:04.147 --> 01:08:06.125
This stuff doesn't happen
there, not even in Omaha.
1512
01:08:06.149 --> 01:08:08.416
I mean, Megan, you died,
1513
01:08:08.452 --> 01:08:11.453
and you came back
in a whole new body.
1514
01:08:11.488 --> 01:08:15.123
- It's hard to keep living
after you die.
1515
01:08:15.158 --> 01:08:18.460
I just... I just felt
like I was stuck.
1516
01:08:18.495 --> 01:08:22.263
- So when you get to heaven,
you can be happy.
1517
01:08:22.299 --> 01:08:24.332
- I already was happy.
1518
01:08:27.304 --> 01:08:29.270
- We were happy, huh?
1519
01:08:33.376 --> 01:08:36.511
- I want you to be happy again.
Jill's great.
1520
01:08:36.546 --> 01:08:38.291
- What are you talking about?
You can't stand her.
1521
01:08:38.315 --> 01:08:40.248
- No, of course I like her.
1522
01:08:40.283 --> 01:08:42.484
She ate the feet soup.
1523
01:08:49.226 --> 01:08:52.427
- Jill does make me happy,
1524
01:08:52.462 --> 01:08:54.395
and for a long time,
I didn't think
1525
01:08:54.431 --> 01:08:56.431
that was possible.
1526
01:08:56.466 --> 01:09:00.368
I'm gonna ask her to marry me.
1527
01:09:00.403 --> 01:09:04.139
- I'm glad.
1528
01:09:05.342 --> 01:09:09.377
Patrick...
1529
01:09:09.412 --> 01:09:12.380
This has to be the last time
we see each other.
1530
01:09:12.415 --> 01:09:13.415
- I know.
1531
01:09:16.453 --> 01:09:19.354
I'll never totally get
over you, Megan.
1532
01:09:19.389 --> 01:09:22.257
I carry you with me now,
1533
01:09:22.292 --> 01:09:26.161
and I think that's okay,
as long as I just...
1534
01:09:26.196 --> 01:09:29.430
I keep looking forward.
1535
01:09:29.466 --> 01:09:32.300
- I'm really happy
to hear that.
1536
01:09:35.305 --> 01:09:37.372
- I got you something.
1537
01:09:37.407 --> 01:09:40.441
I mean, I buy you one
every Christmas.
1538
01:09:40.477 --> 01:09:43.344
I just... I always see something.
1539
01:09:47.484 --> 01:09:49.384
- Open it.
1540
01:09:53.423 --> 01:09:55.323
- Here, give me that.
- Okay.
1541
01:09:58.195 --> 01:10:00.395
This is, um...
1542
01:10:00.430 --> 01:10:02.463
this is truly awful.
1543
01:10:02.499 --> 01:10:05.200
- I know.
It is, right?
1544
01:10:05.235 --> 01:10:07.202
- I'm sorry I didn't...
1545
01:10:07.237 --> 01:10:09.437
I didn't get you anything.
1546
01:10:09.472 --> 01:10:12.340
- You did.
1547
01:10:34.531 --> 01:10:36.431
- Pyke.
1548
01:10:36.466 --> 01:10:38.433
- How'd you get back
from Vancouver already?
1549
01:10:38.468 --> 01:10:39.567
- Oh, uh, Drake.
1550
01:10:39.603 --> 01:10:41.536
He lets other angels
use his private plane.
1551
01:10:41.571 --> 01:10:43.438
He's a real sweetheart
like that.
1552
01:10:43.473 --> 01:10:45.540
Saw what you did.
1553
01:10:45.575 --> 01:10:47.475
You brought Jill and Patrick
back together.
1554
01:10:47.510 --> 01:10:53.448
It was another love miracle,
and it got you a ton of points.
1555
01:10:53.483 --> 01:10:58.319
You did it.
You're going to Heaven.
1556
01:11:01.358 --> 01:11:03.424
How are you not jumping
for joy right now?
1557
01:11:03.460 --> 01:11:05.393
You made it!
1558
01:11:05.428 --> 01:11:07.462
- Merry Christmas, Jason.
1559
01:11:10.300 --> 01:11:12.367
- Merry Christmas, Pyke.
1560
01:11:12.402 --> 01:11:19.374
♪
1561
01:11:22.212 --> 01:11:28.483
♪
1562
01:11:42.365 --> 01:11:45.433
- Pyke, what's happening?
1563
01:11:45.468 --> 01:11:47.502
Oh... are you miserable?
1564
01:11:47.537 --> 01:11:49.370
Or is this just
your general sour face
1565
01:11:49.406 --> 01:11:52.373
that you always have?
1566
01:11:52.409 --> 01:11:54.242
- Do you think I was
good enough?
1567
01:11:54.277 --> 01:11:56.477
I mean, do I deserve to go?
1568
01:11:56.513 --> 01:11:58.446
- I don't know. Who cares?
I don't.
1569
01:11:58.481 --> 01:12:00.448
- Are you surprised
that I got in?
1570
01:12:00.483 --> 01:12:02.417
- Yeah, a little bit.
1571
01:12:02.452 --> 01:12:05.153
But you didn't have to be
the best ever on Earth.
1572
01:12:05.188 --> 01:12:08.356
Not everyone's a saint.
Lord knows I wasn't.
1573
01:12:08.391 --> 01:12:10.158
You just have to
leave people better off
1574
01:12:10.193 --> 01:12:11.359
than how you found them.
1575
01:12:14.264 --> 01:12:16.442
Uh, is that really the shirt
you're wearing up to Heaven?
1576
01:12:16.466 --> 01:12:20.168
Actually, it's a new gift
1577
01:12:20.203 --> 01:12:23.204
from an old friend.
- Ah, okay.
1578
01:12:23.239 --> 01:12:25.506
You know, this bus actually
comes with an attendant
1579
01:12:25.542 --> 01:12:28.409
who can bring you whatever
you want, like a new wardrobe.
1580
01:12:28.445 --> 01:12:30.445
- Welcome.
- Oh!
1581
01:12:30.480 --> 01:12:32.180
- Oh.
- Thank you.
1582
01:12:32.215 --> 01:12:36.184
- Mm-hmm.
1583
01:12:36.219 --> 01:12:37.552
Mmm!
1584
01:12:37.587 --> 01:12:41.489
How I've missed Heaven.
1585
01:12:41.524 --> 01:12:48.496
♪
1586
01:12:53.570 --> 01:12:56.437
This place is everything
Leonard said it was...
1587
01:12:56.473 --> 01:12:58.406
A paradise where you're
able to get anything
1588
01:12:58.441 --> 01:13:00.375
you'll ever want, instantly.
1589
01:13:00.410 --> 01:13:02.477
For example, right now,
I'd love a lemonade...
1590
01:13:05.281 --> 01:13:07.482
With a little booze...
1591
01:13:07.517 --> 01:13:10.151
and a splash of iced tea.
1592
01:13:13.223 --> 01:13:14.500
Perfection.
You know, but now that
1593
01:13:14.524 --> 01:13:17.158
I'm here, I understand
why Leonard took perfection
1594
01:13:17.193 --> 01:13:19.394
because he's an idiot.
1595
01:13:19.429 --> 01:13:22.163
Heaven is like the greatest
club in the Universe.
1596
01:13:22.198 --> 01:13:24.399
It's never crowded.
The people are amazing.
1597
01:13:24.434 --> 01:13:26.501
Thanks, Todd.
Like right now,
1598
01:13:26.536 --> 01:13:28.536
I'm in the middle of kicking
Mrs. Roosevelt's butt
1599
01:13:28.571 --> 01:13:29.571
in croquet.
1600
01:13:32.208 --> 01:13:34.208
- Oh!
1601
01:13:34.244 --> 01:13:36.277
- Sorry, it's how the game
is played, Eleanor.
1602
01:13:36.312 --> 01:13:38.279
Every waking moment
here is fun.
1603
01:13:38.314 --> 01:13:40.548
Like instead of walking,
we drive golf carts,
1604
01:13:40.583 --> 01:13:43.184
which apparently I'm great at,
since I'm about
1605
01:13:43.219 --> 01:13:45.253
to win this race.
1606
01:13:45.288 --> 01:13:47.422
- You did it!
- Bingo!
1607
01:13:47.457 --> 01:13:50.291
- Sweet.
If I was gonna make a list
1608
01:13:50.326 --> 01:13:52.460
of the best things
about my first year in Heaven,
1609
01:13:52.495 --> 01:13:55.263
I would say they are...
inter-dimensional Frisbee.
1610
01:13:55.298 --> 01:14:02.136
♪
1611
01:14:03.473 --> 01:14:06.174
A vibrant local punk scene!
1612
01:14:06.209 --> 01:14:08.409
Tanning for an eternity
without burning.
1613
01:14:08.445 --> 01:14:10.445
Spritz.
1614
01:14:10.480 --> 01:14:12.480
♪
1615
01:14:12.515 --> 01:14:16.417
My morning breath
now tastes amazing.
1616
01:14:16.453 --> 01:14:18.419
Mmm, cucumber water.
1617
01:14:18.455 --> 01:14:20.188
♪
1618
01:14:20.223 --> 01:14:22.557
Best book club ever.
1619
01:14:22.592 --> 01:14:25.226
You know, I guess I'm not
surprised that Bigfoot is real,
1620
01:14:25.261 --> 01:14:26.505
but I am surprised
by the depth of alienation
1621
01:14:26.529 --> 01:14:28.262
that's present in his writing.
1622
01:14:28.298 --> 01:14:31.165
What do you think, Becky?
1623
01:14:31.201 --> 01:14:32.467
Maybe it's not fair
to tell you
1624
01:14:32.502 --> 01:14:34.469
how good this hot tub feels,
1625
01:14:34.504 --> 01:14:36.449
because you have to deal
with everyday Earth hot water,
1626
01:14:36.473 --> 01:14:39.340
which is basically like
sitting in warm spit
1627
01:14:39.375 --> 01:14:40.508
compared to this thing.
1628
01:14:40.543 --> 01:14:43.478
Oh, man, it's like being
hugged by a hot cloud.
1629
01:14:43.513 --> 01:14:46.481
- Breadsticks?
- Oh, thank you.
1630
01:14:46.516 --> 01:14:49.517
- Breadsticks?
- Nope, I'm good.
1631
01:14:49.552 --> 01:14:51.486
Pyke, enough with
the breadsticks, okay?
1632
01:14:51.521 --> 01:14:54.288
You're getting crumbs
all in the tub.
1633
01:14:54.324 --> 01:14:56.424
- Sorry, I can't help it.
1634
01:14:56.459 --> 01:14:57.425
It's just that
I can't get over the fact
1635
01:14:57.460 --> 01:14:59.327
that the Olive Garden here
1636
01:14:59.362 --> 01:15:01.329
has literally
unlimited breadsticks.
1637
01:15:01.364 --> 01:15:03.231
Like, I can have
infinity breadsticks.
1638
01:15:04.467 --> 01:15:07.268
Why? Why?
Why do you still use the phone?
1639
01:15:07.303 --> 01:15:08.469
- Oh, it's just a habit.
1640
01:15:08.505 --> 01:15:10.371
I got pretty addicted
to that angel app.
1641
01:15:10.406 --> 01:15:12.206
Ooh, a woman's about
to get attacked
1642
01:15:12.242 --> 01:15:14.442
by a bird in Central Park.
- Ooh, who cares?
1643
01:15:14.477 --> 01:15:16.444
Okay?
Just sit back. Relax.
1644
01:15:16.479 --> 01:15:19.180
Life on Earth
isn't our concern anymore.
1645
01:15:19.215 --> 01:15:21.182
- Someone just accepted
the miracle.
1646
01:15:21.217 --> 01:15:22.283
- Put the phone away.
1647
01:15:22.318 --> 01:15:24.218
Please enjoy Heaven.
1648
01:15:24.254 --> 01:15:26.153
- But the Heaven Phone
is so cool.
1649
01:15:26.189 --> 01:15:28.523
It's indestructible.
1650
01:15:28.558 --> 01:15:30.324
- Okay, yeah.
I get it.
1651
01:15:30.360 --> 01:15:32.326
All right.
1652
01:15:32.362 --> 01:15:34.173
Yo, we should probably think
about getting out of here soon.
1653
01:15:34.197 --> 01:15:35.341
- How long have
we been in here?
1654
01:15:35.365 --> 01:15:37.331
- Two weeks.
- Okay, look,
1655
01:15:37.367 --> 01:15:39.300
I say we soak
for a couple more days,
1656
01:15:39.335 --> 01:15:40.513
and we should probably
join Lincoln's game
1657
01:15:40.537 --> 01:15:42.470
of running charades.
- I like that.
1658
01:15:44.274 --> 01:15:47.241
- Your boy's
not even pruning.
1659
01:15:47.277 --> 01:15:49.243
- Aliens are real?
1660
01:15:49.279 --> 01:15:51.412
And they're tiny.
1661
01:15:58.187 --> 01:15:59.453
Hmm.
1662
01:16:10.266 --> 01:16:13.167
Maspeth?
1663
01:16:13.202 --> 01:16:15.403
Barker.
1664
01:16:17.340 --> 01:16:20.474
Come on, come on.
Someone take the miracle.
1665
01:16:20.510 --> 01:16:24.512
♪
1666
01:16:24.547 --> 01:16:27.181
Come on.
1667
01:16:30.119 --> 01:16:32.860
- Hi, hey!
1668
01:16:32.121 --> 01:16:33.988
How is it up there?
You met John Lennon yet?
1669
01:16:34.230 --> 01:16:35.890
- Look, I need a favor.
1670
01:16:35.925 --> 01:16:37.690
- Ooh, what about the girl
from "Poltergeist"?
1671
01:16:37.930 --> 01:16:39.160
If you do, have her say,
"Carol Ann."
1672
01:16:39.195 --> 01:16:41.128
It's so creepy-cute.
1673
01:16:41.164 --> 01:16:43.965
It's like it's creepy
but it's also really cute.
1674
01:16:44.000 --> 01:16:45.244
- Can you help me out
with a miracle in New York?
1675
01:16:45.268 --> 01:16:47.902
Someone I care about...
He hates me,
1676
01:16:47.937 --> 01:16:50.115
but I still care about him...
- Pyke, Pyke, Pyke, Pyke, Pyke,
1677
01:16:50.139 --> 01:16:51.216
I'm gonna stop you
right there, okay?
1678
01:16:51.240 --> 01:16:53.174
You have moved on.
1679
01:16:53.209 --> 01:16:55.943
You can no longer interfere
with the lives of the living
1680
01:16:55.979 --> 01:16:57.178
once you are up there.
1681
01:16:57.213 --> 01:17:00.848
Besides, look around you.
Isn't it awesome?
1682
01:17:00.883 --> 01:17:02.183
Why would you want to do that?
1683
01:17:02.218 --> 01:17:04.510
Remember, you drove
through the gates,
1684
01:17:04.870 --> 01:17:06.200
and they closed behind you.
1685
01:17:06.550 --> 01:17:07.855
You're in there now.
That's it.
1686
01:17:07.890 --> 01:17:09.134
You're done. Mazel.
- No, I know.
1687
01:17:09.158 --> 01:17:10.891
I get that, but can you
1688
01:17:10.927 --> 01:17:12.927
maybe make an exception?
1689
01:17:12.962 --> 01:17:15.620
- Well,
you are asking so nicely.
1690
01:17:15.980 --> 01:17:18.199
No! Of course not.
Are you kidding?
1691
01:17:18.234 --> 01:17:20.134
I am up to my neck
in paperwork right now,
1692
01:17:20.169 --> 01:17:22.103
and it's pilot season.
1693
01:17:22.138 --> 01:17:25.206
Besides, afterworld traffic
is so backed up right now.
1694
01:17:25.241 --> 01:17:27.410
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
1695
01:17:27.760 --> 01:17:30.111
Pyke?
Pyke?
1696
01:17:33.149 --> 01:17:34.882
♪
1697
01:17:34.917 --> 01:17:37.151
- Leonard!
Leonard.
1698
01:17:37.186 --> 01:17:39.987
♪
1699
01:17:40.230 --> 01:17:41.922
- What do you want?
Okay, Michelangelo's
1700
01:17:41.958 --> 01:17:43.135
teaching this class.
He does not like it
1701
01:17:43.159 --> 01:17:45.920
when we have visitors.
- I need advice.
1702
01:17:45.128 --> 01:17:47.390
Someone I care about
is in trouble down on Earth.
1703
01:17:47.630 --> 01:17:49.230
If I don't help him,
he's gonna die.
1704
01:17:49.265 --> 01:17:50.931
- Pyke, I'm sure he lived
a great life.
1705
01:17:50.967 --> 01:17:52.933
- No, he didn't.
1706
01:17:52.969 --> 01:17:54.913
He put off all of his dreams
for a chance to be with me.
1707
01:17:54.937 --> 01:17:58.500
Now he's gonna die without
ever realizing any of them.
1708
01:17:58.410 --> 01:17:59.974
- Let him die, okay?
1709
01:18:00.900 --> 01:18:01.820
What's about to happen now
isn't your responsibility.
1710
01:18:01.844 --> 01:18:02.943
- It is.
1711
01:18:02.979 --> 01:18:04.979
He was right about me.
1712
01:18:05.140 --> 01:18:06.914
I don't know if I've ever
done something good
1713
01:18:06.949 --> 01:18:08.916
that wasn't selfish.
1714
01:18:08.951 --> 01:18:11.819
But... maybe I still can.
1715
01:18:11.854 --> 01:18:13.954
- Look at me.
Don't do anything stupid.
1716
01:18:13.990 --> 01:18:16.900
Gandhi's throwing one of
his legendary house parties
1717
01:18:16.125 --> 01:18:17.892
tonight,
and I'm gonna get funky.
1718
01:18:17.927 --> 01:18:19.126
- Oh, God...
1719
01:18:19.162 --> 01:18:22.960
Gandhi.
- Are we good here?
1720
01:18:22.131 --> 01:18:23.898
- Yeah-yeah-yeah, thank you.
1721
01:18:28.400 --> 01:18:29.870
Gandhi.
1722
01:18:32.909 --> 01:18:39.880
♪
1723
01:18:44.870 --> 01:18:47.888
- ♪ When I was younger,
I was insane for fame ♪
1724
01:18:47.924 --> 01:18:49.890
♪ In the glitters
of the lights ♪
1725
01:18:49.926 --> 01:18:51.580
♪ I could see my name
1726
01:18:51.940 --> 01:18:53.940
♪ Since my mouth could move
1727
01:18:53.129 --> 01:18:55.162
♪ I've had something to say
1728
01:18:55.198 --> 01:18:58.833
♪ Now I'm a little older,
but I remain the same ♪
1729
01:18:58.868 --> 01:19:00.935
♪ You can't cheat,
you can't defeat ♪
1730
01:19:00.970 --> 01:19:02.970
♪ You can't beat me
1731
01:19:03.500 --> 01:19:04.972
♪ What you do,
I do it better ♪
1732
01:19:05.700 --> 01:19:06.941
♪ Don't compete with me
1733
01:19:06.976 --> 01:19:08.530
♪ You can't cheat,
you can't defeat ♪
1734
01:19:08.770 --> 01:19:10.978
♪ You can't beat me
1735
01:19:11.130 --> 01:19:13.800
♪ The world is my stage
1736
01:19:13.116 --> 01:19:14.949
♪ I've got it made
1737
01:19:14.984 --> 01:19:17.510
♪ I want it
1738
01:19:17.860 --> 01:19:18.853
♪ I own it
1739
01:19:18.888 --> 01:19:20.921
♪ I want it
1740
01:19:20.957 --> 01:19:24.240
♪ I've got it
1741
01:19:24.600 --> 01:19:26.861
♪ I want it,
I own it ♪
1742
01:19:26.896 --> 01:19:28.963
♪ I want it
1743
01:19:28.998 --> 01:19:33.868
♪
1744
01:19:36.939 --> 01:19:39.940
- The Universe works
in strange ways.
1745
01:19:39.976 --> 01:19:43.100
When you go to Heaven,
it's on a Greyhound bus,
1746
01:19:43.450 --> 01:19:45.946
but when you return,
it's on the Q train,
1747
01:19:45.982 --> 01:19:48.916
or the M train, or the R.
1748
01:19:48.951 --> 01:19:49.962
I still don't know
why they have three trains
1749
01:19:49.986 --> 01:19:51.852
going in the same place.
1750
01:19:53.156 --> 01:19:55.189
- ♪ Watched you drive away
1751
01:19:55.224 --> 01:19:57.892
♪ You're back out
on the road ♪
1752
01:19:57.927 --> 01:20:00.861
- Maspeth, Queens.
I'll give you a $50 tip.
1753
01:20:00.897 --> 01:20:02.174
Now drive like it's
a life-or-death situation.
1754
01:20:02.198 --> 01:20:06.200
Go!
- ♪ A second place for home
1755
01:20:06.235 --> 01:20:10.237
♪ And I know we've got
1,000 ways to go ♪
1756
01:20:10.273 --> 01:20:12.973
♪
1757
01:20:13.900 --> 01:20:14.253
- Thank you!
- ♪ And there's not
1758
01:20:14.277 --> 01:20:18.179
♪ Much more I know
I can control ♪
1759
01:20:18.214 --> 01:20:20.181
Oh, God.
1760
01:20:20.216 --> 01:20:24.840
- ♪ Are you coming back
1761
01:20:24.120 --> 01:20:25.986
- Barker!
- ♪ For me?
1762
01:20:26.220 --> 01:20:27.955
♪
1763
01:20:27.990 --> 01:20:31.158
♪ Hope you're coming
1764
01:20:31.194 --> 01:20:33.600
- Barker!
1765
01:20:33.950 --> 01:20:36.300
James... James!
James!
1766
01:20:36.650 --> 01:20:37.998
James!
1767
01:20:38.340 --> 01:20:40.201
♪
1768
01:20:47.760 --> 01:20:49.276
Are you okay?
1769
01:20:54.116 --> 01:20:56.951
I was so scared for you.
You almost got crushed.
1770
01:20:56.986 --> 01:20:59.190
- I'm still a little shaken up.
1771
01:21:01.190 --> 01:21:03.123
Well, at least
you're good now.
1772
01:21:03.159 --> 01:21:06.930
- Yeah... are you French?
- Yes.
1773
01:21:06.128 --> 01:21:08.996
I guess you can tell, right?
- Yeah.
1774
01:21:09.310 --> 01:21:12.320
Well, I think my run is
officially over for the day.
1775
01:21:12.680 --> 01:21:13.968
- Yeah.
1776
01:21:14.300 --> 01:21:15.247
- Would you maybe want
to grab some coffee?
1777
01:21:15.271 --> 01:21:17.238
- Oh, yes.
I mean, sure.
1778
01:21:17.273 --> 01:21:20.400
Why not?
- Yeah, I actually love France.
1779
01:21:20.760 --> 01:21:23.944
I've been dying to go.
It's kind of a dream of mine.
1780
01:21:23.980 --> 01:21:27.140
- For once, the Universe
gave me a miracle
1781
01:21:27.490 --> 01:21:29.183
I could get behind.
I thought it was just about
1782
01:21:29.218 --> 01:21:32.860
saving Barker until I saw
that jogger chick was French,
1783
01:21:32.121 --> 01:21:35.122
which... come on... seems
pretty convenient to me.
1784
01:21:35.157 --> 01:21:41.280
Unless... the Universe does
do everything for a reason.
1785
01:21:41.630 --> 01:21:42.930
Saving Barker
was the real test,
1786
01:21:42.965 --> 01:21:46.267
not all those arbitrary
points I collected.
1787
01:21:46.302 --> 01:21:49.136
I've finally proved that...
1788
01:21:51.730 --> 01:21:53.173
I belong up there.
1789
01:21:53.209 --> 01:21:58.450
When I was alive, I thought
loving Patrick was enough.
1790
01:21:58.800 --> 01:22:00.948
I closed myself off
to everyone else.
1791
01:22:00.983 --> 01:22:04.985
But now I realize
the most important thing is...
1792
01:22:05.210 --> 01:22:06.954
- I'm gonna stop you
right there,
1793
01:22:06.989 --> 01:22:08.901
because I've got a thousand
more of these today, so...
1794
01:22:08.925 --> 01:22:10.900
- Wait, what?
- Allison Pyke.
1795
01:22:10.126 --> 01:22:12.993
I find you guilty of theft
of afterworld property
1796
01:22:13.290 --> 01:22:14.106
and banish you back to Earth.
1797
01:22:14.130 --> 01:22:16.130
Sentence is 100,000 points.
1798
01:22:16.165 --> 01:22:19.166
Next!
1799
01:22:21.700 --> 01:22:24.972
Well,
that took a hard turn.
1800
01:22:25.700 --> 01:22:26.140
Are you okay?
1801
01:22:28.945 --> 01:22:30.770
- Yeah.
1802
01:22:30.112 --> 01:22:32.880
I am.
1803
01:22:32.915 --> 01:22:35.490
I mean, I've done it once.
1804
01:22:35.840 --> 01:22:36.840
I can do it again.
1805
01:22:42.124 --> 01:22:44.892
I am highly skeptical of that.
1806
01:22:46.929 --> 01:22:48.162
♪
1807
01:22:51.670 --> 01:22:53.133
- Brace for impact.
1808
01:22:53.169 --> 01:22:55.202
- Oh, my God, oh, my God,
oh, my God, oh, my God...
1809
01:22:55.237 --> 01:22:57.171
- We're all gonna die.
1810
01:22:57.206 --> 01:22:58.872
We're all gonna die.
1811
01:23:00.910 --> 01:23:02.910
- Everyone, keep calm.
1812
01:23:02.945 --> 01:23:05.790
I've done this before.
133468
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