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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,922 --> 00:00:05,745 Good morning, Thor. What's going on here? 2 00:00:05,770 --> 00:00:07,256 Jay's taking the guests fishing, 3 00:00:07,281 --> 00:00:09,272 then he's going to cook for them whatever they catch. 4 00:00:09,296 --> 00:00:11,576 Part of new Experience Package. 5 00:00:11,628 --> 00:00:13,427 They're calling it "Bait-to-Plate." 6 00:00:13,452 --> 00:00:14,675 My coinage. 7 00:00:15,215 --> 00:00:17,094 Oh, my God, I think I got something. 8 00:00:17,119 --> 00:00:19,346 You guys are gonna eat so well tonight. 9 00:00:21,842 --> 00:00:24,417 Is that a... human skull? 10 00:00:24,497 --> 00:00:27,111 Of course it is. 11 00:00:27,136 --> 00:00:30,584 That probably end of Bait-to-Plate. 12 00:00:35,978 --> 00:00:38,432 Okay, so, some pretty big ghost news. 13 00:00:38,456 --> 00:00:40,393 We finally heard back from the coroner, 14 00:00:40,418 --> 00:00:42,221 who, frankly, we have spoken to 15 00:00:42,369 --> 00:00:44,652 way too many times since we moved in. 16 00:00:44,677 --> 00:00:46,412 - How is Marvin? - Oh, he's good. 17 00:00:46,437 --> 00:00:47,715 Yeah, Michelle's good, kids are good. 18 00:00:47,739 --> 00:00:49,515 Aw.Girl, can we get on with it? 19 00:00:49,540 --> 00:00:51,653 Okay, well, not a huge shock, since we all know 20 00:00:51,678 --> 00:00:54,549 his finance bros dumped his body in the lake, but 21 00:00:54,574 --> 00:00:57,427 the skull that was found turns out to be Trevor's. 22 00:00:57,452 --> 00:01:00,210 Knew it! You see that chiseled jaw bone? 23 00:01:00,235 --> 00:01:01,823 You could slice brisket with that thing. 24 00:01:01,848 --> 00:01:05,620 Congratulations, Trevor, or my condolences. 25 00:01:05,645 --> 00:01:07,838 As an etiquette stickler, I confess I'm at a loss. 26 00:01:07,897 --> 00:01:09,100 Sam, there's an older couple 27 00:01:09,124 --> 00:01:10,446 walking in, arguing about where 28 00:01:10,471 --> 00:01:12,185 to get the best bagel in Manhattan. 29 00:01:12,210 --> 00:01:13,651 It's obviously Ess-a-Bagel. 30 00:01:13,676 --> 00:01:15,302 Yeah, that's what the guy said. 31 00:01:15,327 --> 00:01:17,219 What are you talking about? 32 00:01:17,244 --> 00:01:19,262 Russ & Daughters? Are you a tourist? 33 00:01:19,287 --> 00:01:22,374 We're both tourists, Lenny. We live in New Jersey. 34 00:01:22,399 --> 00:01:24,852 Oh, my God. It's my parents. 35 00:01:24,877 --> 00:01:26,720 The mishpucha? 36 00:01:26,830 --> 00:01:29,454 We have all been here way too long. 37 00:01:31,238 --> 00:01:32,509 What did I tell you? 38 00:01:32,542 --> 00:01:33,666 You weren't lying. 39 00:01:33,691 --> 00:01:35,347 These are some of the best ants I've ever seen. 40 00:01:35,371 --> 00:01:37,475 And you know your boy Pete's seen some ants. 41 00:01:37,578 --> 00:01:39,862 Well, then, welcome to the ant-watching club, Peter. 42 00:01:39,979 --> 00:01:41,521 We meet Wednesdays, Saturdays, 43 00:01:41,561 --> 00:01:43,474 and any time Samantha brings us an apple core. 44 00:01:43,499 --> 00:01:44,438 Uh, Nigel, 45 00:01:44,463 --> 00:01:45,890 can we get back to our walk? 46 00:01:45,915 --> 00:01:47,293 I'm not interested in watching ants, 47 00:01:47,317 --> 00:01:49,512 or having your ex-lover stare at me weirdly. 48 00:01:49,537 --> 00:01:51,249 This is just how I stare. 49 00:01:51,275 --> 00:01:52,907 I know no other way. 50 00:01:53,429 --> 00:01:55,379 Okay, we can go. 51 00:01:55,444 --> 00:01:57,417 But if Kevin or any of the ants 52 00:01:57,442 --> 00:01:59,925 from the McGregor clan show up, you come get me immediately. 53 00:01:59,950 --> 00:02:02,283 Like I wouldn't. 54 00:02:02,308 --> 00:02:03,781 Enjoy your walk. 55 00:02:03,809 --> 00:02:05,611 I'll be here waiting, 56 00:02:05,636 --> 00:02:07,949 something I'm very good at. 57 00:02:09,446 --> 00:02:12,645 Man, I am loving it here in the shed. 58 00:02:12,670 --> 00:02:15,161 We are so lucky Nigel and Isaac started dating. 59 00:02:15,437 --> 00:02:17,720 We'll see how long that lasts. 60 00:02:18,247 --> 00:02:19,681 Excuse me? 61 00:02:19,706 --> 00:02:21,837 Oh, no, I shouldn't say anything more. 62 00:02:21,862 --> 00:02:23,274 I mean, if I told you 63 00:02:23,299 --> 00:02:25,752 Nigel and I liaisoned on Christmas Eve, 64 00:02:25,777 --> 00:02:27,709 it'd surely get back to... 65 00:02:27,734 --> 00:02:29,538 Oops. Pretend you didn't hear. 66 00:02:30,313 --> 00:02:32,351 What do you mean "liaisoned"? 67 00:02:32,411 --> 00:02:34,784 I guess you'll just have to ask Nigel, won't you? 68 00:02:35,228 --> 00:02:37,120 Let those lips tell you themselves 69 00:02:37,145 --> 00:02:39,248 what they've been up to. 70 00:02:41,150 --> 00:02:42,805 And then he went missing, 71 00:02:42,830 --> 00:02:44,846 and they never found the body. 72 00:02:45,222 --> 00:02:48,115 At least now we finally have his remains. 73 00:02:48,315 --> 00:02:50,020 It's a little bit of closure. 74 00:02:50,045 --> 00:02:53,373 Anyway, we thought we'd just stop by to walk the grounds, 75 00:02:53,398 --> 00:02:56,344 you know, where he's been all this time. 76 00:02:56,369 --> 00:02:57,871 Wow, this is depressing. 77 00:02:57,896 --> 00:02:59,839 Sam, jump in with something here, please. 78 00:02:59,864 --> 00:03:01,756 Uh, do you have any pictures? 79 00:03:01,781 --> 00:03:03,501 I know we'd love to see pictures of Trevor. 80 00:03:03,528 --> 00:03:04,248 Mm-hmm. 81 00:03:04,273 --> 00:03:07,252 Oh, I have some on my phone. 82 00:03:07,277 --> 00:03:10,341 Our-our-our son Jeremy uploaded them from my cloud. 83 00:03:10,366 --> 00:03:12,902 Ooh. What's he up to? Wh-What does Jeremy do? 84 00:03:13,177 --> 00:03:15,810 Well, he sleeps till noon and calls when he needs money. 85 00:03:15,835 --> 00:03:17,961 That checks out. 86 00:03:17,986 --> 00:03:20,691 Oh, here's Trevor as a toddler. 87 00:03:20,716 --> 00:03:23,429 Look at that punim.And that tiny shmeckel. 88 00:03:23,454 --> 00:03:25,963 Hey, that's a respectable shmeckel for a two-year-old. 89 00:03:25,988 --> 00:03:27,773 Ooh, Respectable Shmeckel. 90 00:03:27,798 --> 00:03:28,812 Good band name. 91 00:03:28,837 --> 00:03:30,841 Uh, have you ever worn pants? 92 00:03:30,866 --> 00:03:32,108 Wait a minute. Is that him 93 00:03:32,133 --> 00:03:34,334 with a cardboard cutout of Mel Gibson? 94 00:03:34,823 --> 00:03:37,537 Yeah, it's his bar mitzvah. 95 00:03:37,562 --> 00:03:39,194 The theme was Mel Gibson movies. 96 00:03:39,219 --> 00:03:40,829 Yeah, we-we didn't know 97 00:03:40,854 --> 00:03:42,096 about Mel yet at that time. 98 00:03:42,121 --> 00:03:43,622 What's to know? He's awesome. 99 00:03:43,648 --> 00:03:46,205 Ooh, ask if they're still in my childhood home. 100 00:03:46,232 --> 00:03:48,685 Do you still live in the home where Trevor grew up? 101 00:03:49,199 --> 00:03:51,051 I still do. 102 00:03:51,076 --> 00:03:53,709 Lenny moved into a condo after the divorce. 103 00:03:53,734 --> 00:03:56,001 What? Oh. I'm sorry. You're not married. 104 00:03:56,026 --> 00:03:57,488 No, it's okay. 105 00:03:57,513 --> 00:03:58,885 It's-it's-it's been a long time. 106 00:03:58,910 --> 00:04:00,882 I come from a broken home? 107 00:04:02,359 --> 00:04:04,882 I'm a ghost of divorce? 108 00:04:05,783 --> 00:04:08,519 Ooh, honey, this is one 109 00:04:08,544 --> 00:04:09,774 juicy conundrum. 110 00:04:09,799 --> 00:04:12,346 Do we let Isaac know what Jenkins told y'all, 111 00:04:12,371 --> 00:04:14,686 or do we let him live in blissful ignorance? 112 00:04:14,711 --> 00:04:17,869 Peter, as our resident cuckold, what do you think we should do? 113 00:04:17,894 --> 00:04:20,487 Would you have wanted to know about your wife cheating on you? 114 00:04:20,658 --> 00:04:22,330 Look, being totally honest, 115 00:04:22,356 --> 00:04:24,853 finding out was one of the worst days of my afterlife. 116 00:04:24,878 --> 00:04:26,470 I kind of wish I never knew. 117 00:04:26,495 --> 00:04:29,599 But if Isaac knew, at least he'd be able to deal with it. 118 00:04:29,624 --> 00:04:31,726 Deal with what? Hi. 119 00:04:31,751 --> 00:04:33,675 Hmm? We're trying to figure out whether to tell Isaac 120 00:04:33,699 --> 00:04:34,981 that Nigel cheated on him. 121 00:04:35,532 --> 00:04:36,791 What? 122 00:04:36,830 --> 00:04:38,682 I know. It's a toughie. 123 00:04:39,012 --> 00:04:42,168 Look, Isaac, um, after you left the shed, 124 00:04:42,440 --> 00:04:45,437 Jenkins told Thor and I that on Christmas Eve, 125 00:04:45,462 --> 00:04:47,264 when you and Nigel were briefly broken up, 126 00:04:47,529 --> 00:04:51,294 Jenkins and Nigel... liaisoned. 127 00:04:51,762 --> 00:04:53,264 What does that mean? 128 00:04:53,289 --> 00:04:54,754 He mentioned something about lips 129 00:04:54,779 --> 00:04:57,035 and then did this thing with his eyebrows, 130 00:04:57,060 --> 00:04:58,342 and it didn't seem great. 131 00:04:58,367 --> 00:05:00,780 And that's coming from a famous cuckold. 132 00:05:00,943 --> 00:05:03,649 Hey, your spouse cheated, too! 133 00:05:03,674 --> 00:05:05,216 I'm a lady. That's to be expected. 134 00:05:05,241 --> 00:05:06,953 Your thing's just weird and sad. 135 00:05:08,679 --> 00:05:10,171 I can't believe this. 136 00:05:10,196 --> 00:05:12,472 My parents are divorced, Mel Gibson's a monster. 137 00:05:12,497 --> 00:05:14,480 What the hell is going on in the world? 138 00:05:14,505 --> 00:05:18,349 I get it. It was tough for me when my parents got divorced. 139 00:05:19,412 --> 00:05:21,549 Oh, was sort of expecting a comforting follow-up. 140 00:05:21,575 --> 00:05:23,467 I guess we're just getting information. 141 00:05:23,492 --> 00:05:25,929 It doesn't make any sense. They were the perfect couple. 142 00:05:25,954 --> 00:05:27,917 And it seemed like there was still a spark, right? 143 00:05:27,974 --> 00:05:29,826 That's the thing about divorce. 144 00:05:29,851 --> 00:05:32,594 There's those moments where the two people see each other again 145 00:05:32,619 --> 00:05:34,161 at some family event, like a... 146 00:05:34,186 --> 00:05:35,949 a graduation or a dance recital, 147 00:05:35,974 --> 00:05:38,417 and you think there's a chance they could get back together. 148 00:05:40,323 --> 00:05:42,816 Again, it just never takes that uplifting turn. 149 00:05:43,017 --> 00:05:45,249 But what if the recital didn't end? 150 00:05:45,309 --> 00:05:47,551 Yes. Wait, what do you mean? 151 00:05:47,893 --> 00:05:50,046 We throw a memorial... for me. 152 00:05:50,246 --> 00:05:53,450 And my parents stay here at the B and B for the whole weekend 153 00:05:53,475 --> 00:05:55,407 while we manipulate them back into love. 154 00:05:55,432 --> 00:05:57,193 Are you suggesting we Parent Trap them 155 00:05:57,218 --> 00:05:58,589 from beyond the grave? 156 00:05:58,614 --> 00:06:00,161 Okay, I don't like where this is headed. 157 00:06:00,185 --> 00:06:01,727 That's exactly what I'm suggesting. 158 00:06:01,836 --> 00:06:04,812 Using insider information from their dearly departed son, 159 00:06:04,837 --> 00:06:07,311 you will create the perfect romantic scenario. 160 00:06:07,336 --> 00:06:09,089 Oh. And before you know it... 161 00:06:09,114 --> 00:06:11,667 Boom. The mishpucha is back together. 162 00:06:11,922 --> 00:06:14,213 I don't know that this'll work, but we got to try. 163 00:06:14,238 --> 00:06:16,261 Okay, time-out. 164 00:06:16,495 --> 00:06:18,688 Can we just let these old people be? 165 00:06:18,713 --> 00:06:20,655 I mean, they got divorced for a reason. 166 00:06:20,680 --> 00:06:22,172 Yeah, the reason was me. 167 00:06:22,228 --> 00:06:24,045 You heard them. They split up right after my death. 168 00:06:24,069 --> 00:06:26,560 If this is my fault, then I need to be the one who fixes it. 169 00:06:26,585 --> 00:06:27,866 Trevor thinks it was his fault, 170 00:06:27,891 --> 00:06:29,213 and he wants a chance to fix it. 171 00:06:29,238 --> 00:06:30,800 You're not gonna deny him that, are you? 172 00:06:31,868 --> 00:06:34,640 Okay, fine. Let's set a parent trap for these two. 173 00:06:34,665 --> 00:06:35,588 Very difficult 174 00:06:35,613 --> 00:06:38,368 to build trap big enough to capture both parents. 175 00:06:38,393 --> 00:06:40,756 But if you succeed, 176 00:06:41,060 --> 00:06:43,658 you and small man eat like kings. 177 00:06:44,097 --> 00:06:45,067 What is wrong with you? 178 00:06:48,208 --> 00:06:50,370 How's Operation Parent Trap going? 179 00:06:50,399 --> 00:06:52,122 Not exactly sparks yet. 180 00:06:52,147 --> 00:06:55,426 So, Sunday, maybe we take 87 back? 181 00:06:55,976 --> 00:06:57,939 That sounds fine. 182 00:06:58,403 --> 00:07:00,870 Talk does not get much smaller than that. 183 00:07:00,895 --> 00:07:02,479 Sam, get in here! 184 00:07:02,504 --> 00:07:04,670 These alte kakers need wine, stat! 185 00:07:04,695 --> 00:07:06,278 Oh, this is so nerve-racking. 186 00:07:06,303 --> 00:07:07,955 If these two don't end up together, 187 00:07:07,980 --> 00:07:09,779 Trevor will neverbe born! 188 00:07:10,216 --> 00:07:12,436 We never should have showed her Back to the Future. 189 00:07:12,461 --> 00:07:13,701 Here is some wine. 190 00:07:13,726 --> 00:07:15,225 Ah.Oh, thank you. 191 00:07:15,250 --> 00:07:17,436 Something smells delicious. What are we having? 192 00:07:17,735 --> 00:07:19,185 It's red snapper. Red snapper, Ma. 193 00:07:19,209 --> 00:07:20,840 They had it every year on their anniversary. 194 00:07:20,864 --> 00:07:23,371 We used to have that every year on our anniversary. 195 00:07:23,396 --> 00:07:26,195 That's because, on our honeymoon, we went to Acapulco. 196 00:07:26,220 --> 00:07:29,325 Right. And the two things on the menu at the resort 197 00:07:29,350 --> 00:07:31,239 was pork and red snapper. 198 00:07:31,264 --> 00:07:33,674 Well, this thawing seems like a very positive sign. 199 00:07:34,304 --> 00:07:36,284 Now play "The Best of Times" from the musical 200 00:07:36,309 --> 00:07:38,158 La Cage aux Folles. 201 00:07:40,008 --> 00:07:41,987 Oh, my God. Esther, do you hear it? 202 00:07:42,012 --> 00:07:43,410 This was our song. 203 00:07:43,450 --> 00:07:46,987 We used to sing this song at every family occasion. 204 00:07:47,012 --> 00:07:48,731 Including Trevor's bar mitzvah. 205 00:07:48,756 --> 00:07:52,204 I insisted we all do it in an Australian accent to honor Mel. 206 00:07:52,579 --> 00:07:53,988 What a lovely tradition. 207 00:07:54,013 --> 00:07:54,813 It was. 208 00:07:54,838 --> 00:07:56,118 It was. 209 00:07:56,230 --> 00:07:57,732 We had some good times. 210 00:07:57,757 --> 00:07:59,557 Didn't we, Esther? 211 00:07:59,932 --> 00:08:01,261 We sure did, Lenny. 212 00:08:01,286 --> 00:08:03,358 Trevor, it's working.Uh-huh. 213 00:08:03,383 --> 00:08:04,793 These two are gonna shtup. 214 00:08:04,818 --> 00:08:07,617 Yay! You're going to exist. 215 00:08:09,566 --> 00:08:11,154 Nigel, 216 00:08:11,179 --> 00:08:12,211 you should know 217 00:08:12,236 --> 00:08:15,532 that Jenkins has been spreading the most vile of rumors, 218 00:08:15,557 --> 00:08:18,706 trying to drive a wedge between us. Is he? 219 00:08:18,731 --> 00:08:22,400 He told my friends that you and he liaisoned on Christmas Eve. 220 00:08:22,668 --> 00:08:24,517 Need I remind you 221 00:08:24,542 --> 00:08:26,821 that we were temporarily broken up at that point? 222 00:08:27,303 --> 00:08:28,784 So it's true? 223 00:08:28,809 --> 00:08:30,409 We were on a respite. 224 00:08:30,708 --> 00:08:32,078 A respite? 225 00:08:32,103 --> 00:08:34,844 We were estranged a mere 15 hours. 226 00:08:35,208 --> 00:08:37,137 You refused to even kiss me. 227 00:08:37,175 --> 00:08:38,800 You injured my pride. 228 00:08:38,825 --> 00:08:40,804 I can't even look at you right now. 229 00:08:40,906 --> 00:08:42,705 We're finished. 230 00:08:43,091 --> 00:08:44,851 Again, we were on a respite. 231 00:08:45,051 --> 00:08:47,200 A respite! 232 00:08:48,216 --> 00:08:50,545 So, this is where we watch movies and just relax. 233 00:08:50,570 --> 00:08:51,346 Ooh. 234 00:08:51,371 --> 00:08:53,161 We thought maybe you could enjoy your dessert here. 235 00:08:53,185 --> 00:08:55,041 Thank you so much. 236 00:08:55,066 --> 00:08:57,360 Would you guys like to watch a movie? 237 00:08:57,450 --> 00:08:59,441 Oh, Jay's getting on board with attempting 238 00:08:59,466 --> 00:09:01,616 to have your parents fornicate. That's nice. 239 00:09:01,662 --> 00:09:04,000 Okay, Sam, now offer to put on The Horse Whisperer. 240 00:09:04,025 --> 00:09:05,565 It was a Robert Redford film that my mother always 241 00:09:05,589 --> 00:09:07,346 referred to as "sensual." 242 00:09:07,371 --> 00:09:08,940 You know what movie I watched 243 00:09:08,965 --> 00:09:11,435 the other night that was good? The Horse Whisperer. 244 00:09:11,459 --> 00:09:12,999 Uh-oh. 245 00:09:13,024 --> 00:09:14,913 Oh, I know that one. 246 00:09:14,938 --> 00:09:16,361 Good choice. 247 00:09:16,386 --> 00:09:18,114 Your mom's all horned up. 248 00:09:18,934 --> 00:09:21,224 I don't think we ever made it through that one all the way. 249 00:09:21,248 --> 00:09:22,608 Right? No. 250 00:09:22,633 --> 00:09:25,123 Well, we should probably leave quickly. 251 00:09:25,148 --> 00:09:26,948 We're gonna leave you two alone. 252 00:09:30,713 --> 00:09:31,892 Oh, Lenny, you still 253 00:09:31,917 --> 00:09:33,107 got those moves. 254 00:09:33,132 --> 00:09:34,501 And you got the sexiest shoulders 255 00:09:34,526 --> 00:09:37,151 this side of the Long Island Expressway. 256 00:09:37,176 --> 00:09:39,586 Ah, excuse me. 257 00:09:39,611 --> 00:09:41,060 Seriously? 258 00:09:41,085 --> 00:09:42,895 Well, it's work. Right-right now? 259 00:09:42,920 --> 00:09:44,889 No, Dad, no. No, no, no, no, no! 260 00:09:44,914 --> 00:09:47,543 Uh, yeah, hi, hi. Lenny Lefkowitz here. 261 00:09:47,568 --> 00:09:50,145 No, it's a great time. 262 00:09:50,185 --> 00:09:51,987 Oh, she did not like that. 263 00:09:52,012 --> 00:09:54,071 Unbelievable. 264 00:09:54,145 --> 00:09:55,385 No, Mom. 265 00:09:55,410 --> 00:09:57,559 Come back, make love to Dad! 266 00:09:57,975 --> 00:10:01,124 I can't believe I ever trusted Nigel. 267 00:10:01,230 --> 00:10:04,667 What's up with Commander Crap over here looking all sad? 268 00:10:04,716 --> 00:10:07,645 Isaac now second most famous cuckold in house. 269 00:10:08,078 --> 00:10:08,928 Really? 270 00:10:08,953 --> 00:10:10,611 Oh, how do I get past this? 271 00:10:10,636 --> 00:10:11,665 Well, 272 00:10:11,690 --> 00:10:14,214 in my experience, nothing gets you over the last like the next. 273 00:10:14,239 --> 00:10:15,870 You got to go smooch someone else. 274 00:10:15,895 --> 00:10:18,224 Yeah, get some strange. 275 00:10:18,599 --> 00:10:21,218 I learned that term from the water heater repairman. 276 00:10:21,418 --> 00:10:24,617 It means unfamiliar genitals, huh? 277 00:10:24,817 --> 00:10:25,837 Catchy. 278 00:10:26,036 --> 00:10:28,576 What strange is even available to me? 279 00:10:28,776 --> 00:10:31,365 I mean, other than Jenkins, which... no, thank you. 280 00:10:31,390 --> 00:10:33,799 Thor do know of other option. 281 00:10:33,824 --> 00:10:36,623 Other day, when yelling from window 282 00:10:36,702 --> 00:10:38,292 to son Bjorn, I learn 283 00:10:38,319 --> 00:10:41,277 there is a gay Puritan ghost also living at Farnsbys'. 284 00:10:41,302 --> 00:10:42,671 Perhaps since Puritan ghost 285 00:10:42,696 --> 00:10:46,245 is gay and Isaac also gay, you two might... 286 00:10:46,854 --> 00:10:47,861 get along. 287 00:10:47,886 --> 00:10:49,878 Thor, that's pretty insulting to suggest two people would be 288 00:10:49,902 --> 00:10:52,028 into each other just because they're both gay. 289 00:10:52,053 --> 00:10:52,983 Yes. 290 00:10:53,008 --> 00:10:54,808 Thank you, Sasappis. 291 00:10:55,450 --> 00:10:58,949 Now... the Farnsbys', you say? 292 00:10:58,974 --> 00:11:01,034 Sam, my dad blew it. 293 00:11:01,059 --> 00:11:03,205 He took a phone call at a very inopportune time, 294 00:11:03,230 --> 00:11:05,170 which my mom was always annoyed about when they were married. 295 00:11:05,194 --> 00:11:07,559 That's not good. Trevor's dad blew it. 296 00:11:07,584 --> 00:11:10,473 Uh, sorry, No Pants! They're leaving right after the memorial 297 00:11:10,592 --> 00:11:12,594 tomorrow, so we have to get something to happen tonight. 298 00:11:12,618 --> 00:11:15,126 Babe, I think we got to take the "L" on this, okay? 299 00:11:15,151 --> 00:11:17,176 We tried to get two elderly people to smush 300 00:11:17,201 --> 00:11:18,740 at their son's memorial weekend, 301 00:11:18,765 --> 00:11:20,655 and we just didn't quite get there. 302 00:11:20,680 --> 00:11:22,261 Their divorce is my fault. 303 00:11:22,286 --> 00:11:24,365 If I don't do everything that I can to solve this right now, 304 00:11:24,388 --> 00:11:26,271 I am never going to get another chance. 305 00:11:26,508 --> 00:11:27,967 I don't like these long silences. 306 00:11:27,992 --> 00:11:29,792 They're never good. 307 00:11:29,817 --> 00:11:32,290 Okay, so, in The Parent Trap, they sent a message 308 00:11:32,315 --> 00:11:34,335 to the one parent to get them to show up at the same place 309 00:11:34,359 --> 00:11:36,300 where they knew the other parent was going to be. 310 00:11:36,325 --> 00:11:37,359 Okay. 311 00:11:37,384 --> 00:11:38,754 What's your point? 312 00:11:38,779 --> 00:11:40,359 You could sneak into your mom's room 313 00:11:40,384 --> 00:11:41,973 and use her phone to text your dad 314 00:11:41,998 --> 00:11:43,025 and invite him over. 315 00:11:43,050 --> 00:11:45,790 You want him to sext his dad?! 316 00:11:45,815 --> 00:11:47,794 I wouldn't put it like that. 317 00:11:48,318 --> 00:11:49,558 I love it. 318 00:11:49,583 --> 00:11:51,902 But, yes, I want him to sext his dad. 319 00:11:51,927 --> 00:11:53,142 You're a genius. 320 00:11:53,400 --> 00:11:55,639 We're going to hell. 321 00:12:00,295 --> 00:12:02,339 So, how did it go? 322 00:12:02,362 --> 00:12:04,388 I think it went well. Found my mom's phone, 323 00:12:04,413 --> 00:12:06,650 sexted my dad, at which point he came over. 324 00:12:06,675 --> 00:12:09,046 And then, obviously, I got the hell out of there. 325 00:12:09,319 --> 00:12:11,003 Well, they look pretty cozy. 326 00:12:11,028 --> 00:12:14,135 - Oh, baby, I can let you know. - Wait. 327 00:12:14,160 --> 00:12:16,249 Are you also just interpreting their body language, or...? 328 00:12:16,273 --> 00:12:17,497 Uh-uh, honey. I saw them. 329 00:12:17,522 --> 00:12:18,449 Wanted to make sure 330 00:12:18,474 --> 00:12:20,759 it happened for you, Trev. Congrats. 331 00:12:20,784 --> 00:12:22,025 You watched my parents do it? 332 00:12:22,205 --> 00:12:23,395 It was beautiful. 333 00:12:23,616 --> 00:12:24,856 Seriously? You, too? 334 00:12:25,047 --> 00:12:26,365 Cards on the table. I was gonna leave, 335 00:12:26,389 --> 00:12:27,670 but then Hetty called me a wimp. 336 00:12:27,708 --> 00:12:29,079 It was very educational. 337 00:12:29,205 --> 00:12:31,837 Esther put on quite the master class. 338 00:12:32,111 --> 00:12:33,517 Uh, hey, Sam, 339 00:12:33,632 --> 00:12:36,954 I'd like you to meet Tara Reid. 340 00:12:37,154 --> 00:12:38,965 I'm here for Trevor's memorial. 341 00:12:39,166 --> 00:12:40,622 My parents are boning, 342 00:12:40,647 --> 00:12:42,934 and Tara Reid is at my memorial? Best day ever! 343 00:12:42,959 --> 00:12:44,884 It's very nice to meet you. 344 00:12:44,909 --> 00:12:46,320 Who is Tara Reid? 345 00:12:46,345 --> 00:12:47,846 We've been through this. 346 00:12:47,871 --> 00:12:49,807 She was a huge movie star. 347 00:12:49,832 --> 00:12:51,425 I was at her birthday at The Surf Lodge. 348 00:12:51,450 --> 00:12:52,551 Ah.She was going to be 349 00:12:52,576 --> 00:12:54,075 my celebrity out if I ever got 350 00:12:54,100 --> 00:12:55,135 into a long-term relationship. 351 00:12:55,159 --> 00:12:57,156 Uh, Trevor's brother Jeremy hired Tara 352 00:12:57,317 --> 00:12:58,868 off of an app called Pop-In? 353 00:12:59,068 --> 00:13:02,170 Which is kind of like Cameo, but for in-person appearances. 354 00:13:02,370 --> 00:13:04,092 I don't know any of those words. 355 00:13:04,292 --> 00:13:06,963 My brother couldn't make it so he sent Tara Reid? 356 00:13:07,339 --> 00:13:09,911 Is that a bro or what? 357 00:13:10,125 --> 00:13:11,496 This is Isaac! 358 00:13:11,696 --> 00:13:15,019 Other homosexual ghost I tell you about! 359 00:13:15,219 --> 00:13:16,890 Hello, George! 360 00:13:17,090 --> 00:13:18,681 Hello, Isaac! 361 00:13:18,881 --> 00:13:20,987 Okay, Thor go now! 362 00:13:21,012 --> 00:13:23,334 Let you scream in private! 363 00:13:25,441 --> 00:13:29,634 So, George, tell me about yourself! 364 00:13:29,718 --> 00:13:33,440 Enough chitchat! Let's get to the naughty stuff! 365 00:13:33,641 --> 00:13:36,622 Oh, that's a bit forward! 366 00:13:36,823 --> 00:13:39,369 Aren't you a Puritan?! Yes, well, 367 00:13:39,394 --> 00:13:41,896 when I died and didn't immediately go to heaven, 368 00:13:42,086 --> 00:13:44,157 I reconsidered some things! 369 00:13:44,297 --> 00:13:46,176 I'm a bad, bad boy now! 370 00:13:46,761 --> 00:13:49,910 And I want to hear what you're wearing, sir! 371 00:13:50,925 --> 00:13:55,450 You know, it's all a bit fast for me, George! 372 00:13:55,810 --> 00:13:57,661 How about reading?! 373 00:13:58,036 --> 00:13:59,317 Are you a fan?! 374 00:13:59,342 --> 00:14:01,493 Have you read The Iliad?! 375 00:14:01,518 --> 00:14:03,925 What did you say about an oily lad?! 376 00:14:03,950 --> 00:14:06,667 Describe him... slowly! 377 00:14:22,968 --> 00:14:25,460 Well, looks like a life well lived, Trevor. 378 00:14:25,814 --> 00:14:27,745 Thank you all for coming. 379 00:14:27,770 --> 00:14:31,364 Losing a child is the worst thing any parent can go through. 380 00:14:32,448 --> 00:14:34,760 But being here today with all of you 381 00:14:34,785 --> 00:14:39,219 who loved and cared about our son, 382 00:14:39,872 --> 00:14:42,420 it makes me feel like he's here in the room. 383 00:14:44,421 --> 00:14:46,117 We love you, son. 384 00:14:46,237 --> 00:14:48,088 I love you guys. 385 00:14:48,288 --> 00:14:49,906 Hey, Trev. 386 00:14:49,931 --> 00:14:52,481 The basement ghosts send their condolences. 387 00:14:52,681 --> 00:14:54,923 I'm trying to listen to my parents talk. 388 00:14:55,123 --> 00:14:56,974 Whoa. Are those your folks? 389 00:14:57,174 --> 00:14:59,145 I saw them boning last night! 390 00:14:59,345 --> 00:15:01,562 Not only 391 00:15:01,680 --> 00:15:04,442 has this been a loving tribute to our son. 392 00:15:04,749 --> 00:15:09,032 It's been a reminder of what is really important in life. 393 00:15:09,232 --> 00:15:10,723 I'd like to say a few words. 394 00:15:11,853 --> 00:15:13,384 Tara Reid is giving a speech. 395 00:15:13,585 --> 00:15:15,126 Sure. Why not? 396 00:15:16,777 --> 00:15:18,788 First of all, I'm excited to tell you 397 00:15:18,988 --> 00:15:21,660 that Pop-In and Taco Bell have teamed up 398 00:15:21,860 --> 00:15:23,491 for a very exciting offer. 399 00:15:23,691 --> 00:15:25,322 Anyone that leaves here from the memorial 400 00:15:25,522 --> 00:15:27,674 and mentions Trevor's name at the drive-through 401 00:15:27,874 --> 00:15:29,245 gets a free large drink. 402 00:15:29,445 --> 00:15:32,677 Aw. That's nice. 403 00:15:32,785 --> 00:15:35,117 I didn't really know Trevor that well, but 404 00:15:35,142 --> 00:15:37,250 he seemed like a really warm and wonderful guy. 405 00:15:37,450 --> 00:15:40,884 And he was a bit of a player.Yes. 406 00:15:40,909 --> 00:15:42,833 And the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. 407 00:15:43,023 --> 00:15:46,956 Right, Lenny? He slipped me his business card in the kitchen. 408 00:15:47,917 --> 00:15:49,547 Are you kidding me, Lenny? 409 00:15:49,738 --> 00:15:50,668 Oh, God. 410 00:15:50,709 --> 00:15:52,149 It was a business card. 411 00:15:52,301 --> 00:15:53,371 Like she's really in the market 412 00:15:53,395 --> 00:15:55,340 for wholesale lighting supplies? 413 00:15:56,571 --> 00:15:57,853 You never know. 414 00:15:57,972 --> 00:15:59,123 Oops. 415 00:15:59,268 --> 00:16:00,556 I wanted to let you know that I've decided 416 00:16:00,580 --> 00:16:01,771 to forgive you. 417 00:16:02,146 --> 00:16:04,427 I've realized that what we have is special. 418 00:16:04,452 --> 00:16:05,693 I agree. 419 00:16:05,718 --> 00:16:08,825 Sometimes it takes a meaningless Christmas liaison 420 00:16:08,850 --> 00:16:11,437 or screaming obscenities with a pervy Puritan 421 00:16:11,462 --> 00:16:13,403 to realize what you've had all along. 422 00:16:13,603 --> 00:16:15,364 Oh, you heard that? 423 00:16:15,475 --> 00:16:17,774 Paul Revere never screamed so loudly. 424 00:16:17,799 --> 00:16:19,416 Traitorous scoundrel. 425 00:16:19,441 --> 00:16:20,788 Okay, let's not go down that road. 426 00:16:20,822 --> 00:16:22,369 The point is, Nigel, 427 00:16:22,394 --> 00:16:24,110 is that you are a gentleman. 428 00:16:24,165 --> 00:16:25,991 And that is a very rare thing, 429 00:16:26,016 --> 00:16:28,032 and I could not have chosen a better person 430 00:16:28,057 --> 00:16:30,124 to be stuck with together forever. 431 00:16:30,324 --> 00:16:32,480 But, moving forward, I don't think 432 00:16:32,505 --> 00:16:34,131 you should continue to live with Jenkins. 433 00:16:34,156 --> 00:16:35,957 Not because I don't trust you, 434 00:16:35,982 --> 00:16:38,049 but because he's a son of a bitch. 435 00:16:38,249 --> 00:16:40,270 That I cannot argue with. 436 00:16:40,470 --> 00:16:42,221 So what are you proposing? 437 00:16:43,437 --> 00:16:48,280 Well, I guess I'm saying that you should not live in the shed 438 00:16:48,305 --> 00:16:52,148 but rather in the mansion with me. 439 00:16:53,198 --> 00:16:56,911 You mean like in your room? 440 00:16:56,998 --> 00:16:59,392 I mean like in a nearby room. 441 00:16:59,417 --> 00:17:01,219 Don't want to rush things. 442 00:17:01,244 --> 00:17:03,265 We are really baby-stepping this thing. 443 00:17:03,290 --> 00:17:06,447 Well, we have eternity. 444 00:17:06,910 --> 00:17:09,229 All right, Isaac, I accept. 445 00:17:09,254 --> 00:17:10,755 Ooh, what about the library? 446 00:17:10,780 --> 00:17:13,021 I quite fancy that comfy couch. 447 00:17:13,046 --> 00:17:14,367 Are there ants in there? 448 00:17:14,392 --> 00:17:17,441 No, but Jay dropped part of a sandwich 449 00:17:17,466 --> 00:17:19,290 behind that couch a few weeks ago, 450 00:17:19,315 --> 00:17:21,817 so at night there are roaches. 451 00:17:22,017 --> 00:17:24,649 Oh, I think I'm going to like it here. 452 00:17:24,849 --> 00:17:27,219 You haven't changed one bit. 453 00:17:27,244 --> 00:17:30,748 Same old Lenny with the work calls and the wandering eye. 454 00:17:30,773 --> 00:17:32,882 Sam, you got to do something. Get in there. 455 00:17:32,907 --> 00:17:34,682 Maybe there's an innocent explanation 456 00:17:34,707 --> 00:17:35,882 for the whole business card thing. 457 00:17:35,906 --> 00:17:38,810 Maybe Tara Reid is interested in wholesale lighting. 458 00:17:38,835 --> 00:17:39,965 Yes, I... 'Cause 459 00:17:39,990 --> 00:17:41,229 I think she's a producer 460 00:17:41,254 --> 00:17:44,722 on those Sharknado movies, and they may have lighting needs. 461 00:17:44,835 --> 00:17:46,205 Sharknado? 462 00:17:46,493 --> 00:17:47,994 What are you two talking about? 463 00:17:48,019 --> 00:17:50,820 I saw you guys last night. There was still a spark there. 464 00:17:50,845 --> 00:17:53,482 Why do you even care? Who are you? 465 00:17:53,507 --> 00:17:56,529 Look, I know you said you felt Trevor's presence in that room. 466 00:17:56,561 --> 00:17:58,095 And what if you were right? 467 00:17:58,120 --> 00:18:01,492 What if Trevor is here with us today? 468 00:18:01,532 --> 00:18:04,548 My parents also got divorced, and I know I blame myself. 469 00:18:05,629 --> 00:18:08,672 Maybe Trevor blames his death for your divorce. 470 00:18:08,697 --> 00:18:09,938 Well, why would he do that? 471 00:18:09,963 --> 00:18:11,751 Because you got divorced right after I died. 472 00:18:11,869 --> 00:18:13,374 Maybe because of the timing. 473 00:18:13,450 --> 00:18:15,251 No, no. Trevor's death had nothing 474 00:18:15,344 --> 00:18:17,015 to do with us splitting up. 475 00:18:17,229 --> 00:18:20,822 The-the truth is, our problems were there long before that. 476 00:18:21,115 --> 00:18:24,202 I caught Lenny cheating when the boys were still in junior high. 477 00:18:24,227 --> 00:18:25,403 I didn't know that. 478 00:18:25,428 --> 00:18:27,009 And we decided to stay together 479 00:18:27,034 --> 00:18:28,314 until they were out of the house. 480 00:18:28,339 --> 00:18:30,621 But Jeremy never left the house. 481 00:18:30,646 --> 00:18:32,853 He-he was still living there when he was 30. 482 00:18:32,912 --> 00:18:34,453 So it wasn't T-Money's fault. 483 00:18:34,483 --> 00:18:36,176 They were just waiting for J-Dog to grow up? 484 00:18:36,200 --> 00:18:37,857 It's very hard to take this story seriously 485 00:18:37,881 --> 00:18:39,422 with you using those monikers. 486 00:18:39,447 --> 00:18:40,817 So it wasn't Trevor's fault? 487 00:18:41,018 --> 00:18:42,554 Divorce isn't about the kids. 488 00:18:42,579 --> 00:18:43,899 It's about the parents. 489 00:18:45,681 --> 00:18:47,302 Trevor, if you're really here, 490 00:18:47,327 --> 00:18:49,308 we want you to know that. 491 00:18:49,683 --> 00:18:52,355 You were the best thing to come out of our marriage. 492 00:18:53,062 --> 00:18:53,986 The point is, 493 00:18:54,011 --> 00:18:56,494 Trevor, we miss you every day, 494 00:18:56,954 --> 00:18:59,275 and we're so glad you were our son. 495 00:19:02,285 --> 00:19:05,077 I really want to hug my mom right now. 496 00:19:05,400 --> 00:19:08,120 All right, I'm going to step in and mama bear. 497 00:19:08,145 --> 00:19:10,550 But you keep that baby shmeckel at a safe distance. 498 00:19:15,435 --> 00:19:18,224 We're never going to grow apart, will we, Jay? 499 00:19:18,691 --> 00:19:20,348 Okay, it's a key point in the game, 500 00:19:20,373 --> 00:19:23,101 but this feels like a must-pause conversation. 501 00:19:23,126 --> 00:19:24,314 Smart move, Jay. 502 00:19:24,339 --> 00:19:27,306 Hey, we're #CoupleGoals. 503 00:19:27,330 --> 00:19:29,275 I know. It's just, I always thought 504 00:19:29,300 --> 00:19:32,129 my parents were rock solid, too, and it seems like 505 00:19:32,154 --> 00:19:33,961 Trevor thought the same thing about his folks. 506 00:19:33,986 --> 00:19:35,949 Key to successful marriage... 507 00:19:35,974 --> 00:19:38,396 Die by the time you're 35 from lightning strike 508 00:19:38,421 --> 00:19:39,963 before things get stale. 509 00:19:39,988 --> 00:19:41,446 I know things are great right now, 510 00:19:41,471 --> 00:19:42,933 but what about when we have kids, 511 00:19:42,958 --> 00:19:45,159 or after they're grown up and we're empty nesters? 512 00:19:45,184 --> 00:19:47,009 Okay, I-I love to panic 513 00:19:47,034 --> 00:19:48,759 about hypotheticals decades in the future, 514 00:19:48,784 --> 00:19:51,740 but, babe, we're never going to be empty nesters. 515 00:19:51,876 --> 00:19:55,410 We have eight idiot kids who can literally never leave. 516 00:19:55,435 --> 00:19:56,420 Oh, that's true. Not loving that. 517 00:19:56,445 --> 00:19:57,531 Jay very wise. 518 00:19:57,556 --> 00:19:59,560 Hey, guys, I just wanted to say thanks. 519 00:19:59,585 --> 00:20:00,865 I had a really great stay. 520 00:20:00,890 --> 00:20:03,256 Have a safe drive back. Thank you. 521 00:20:03,377 --> 00:20:04,838 - All right, ciao. - Bye. 522 00:20:05,101 --> 00:20:06,598 Bye. 523 00:20:06,771 --> 00:20:08,259 What was that noise? 524 00:20:09,223 --> 00:20:11,317 I'll be right back. 525 00:20:13,040 --> 00:20:14,251 Tara, look out! 526 00:20:14,276 --> 00:20:15,813 Whoa! 527 00:20:16,013 --> 00:20:17,697 Oh, my God.Yeah. 528 00:20:17,722 --> 00:20:19,377 You could have fallen down the stairs. 529 00:20:19,445 --> 00:20:20,940 Trevor, did you knock that vase on the floor 530 00:20:20,964 --> 00:20:22,891 to try to kill Tara Reid? 531 00:20:22,916 --> 00:20:25,142 Okay, yes, busted. 39130

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