All language subtitles for 31 - Follow That Witch Pt2

Last week, Darrin was all set

to get a big new
account for the agency.

What he didn't know was
that the ambitious Mr. Barkley

had hired a private detective,
Charlie Leach by name,

to check on Darrin's
background and mine.

Darrin passed the test.

But when Mr. Leach checked
with Abner's sister, Harriet,

she had some rather
strange things to say about me.

None of which he
believed, of course...

until he caught me
in a weak moment.

When he became a nuisance,
and that's putting it mildly,

I just had to teach
him a lesson.

Unfortunately, my
problems were just beginning.

Okay, I'll get to the point.

I have proof that
you're a full-blooded,

cauldron-stirring witch!

And if you don't
give me what I want,

I'm gonna blow
the whistle on you!

What makes you
think I'm a witch?

Honey... last night,
you put me on a ledge

outside an office
building 40 stories high.

Now, you're not
gonna try to tell me

that you're the typical
all-American girl next door.

What if I told you I didn't care
if people knew I was a witch?

Well, maybe you don't, but
I'll bet your husband does.

Just what do you
know about Darrin?

I know everything about him...

including the fact
that he's trying to land

the Robbins Baby Food account.

Have I got your interest?

Go on.

And then there's this
guy called Barkley

who makes all the decisions

about who's gonna
land the account.

Well, he hired me to
investigate the two of you.

You're a private detective?

Ah, now you're catching on.

Shall I go on?

No, I can guess the rest.

You spied on me.

And saw some pretty wild things.

Any questions?

Just one.

How would you like to
be turned into a parrot?

Oh, come on.

I know you're
some kind of a witch,

but nobody can turn
a person into a parrot.

Oh?

Okay. I believe
you. I believe you.

Boy!

You're some witch.

Exactly.

Now you better get out of here,

before I turn you into
a parrot permanently.

Oh, come on, lady.
You wouldn't do that.

Besides... I don't figure you
to be one of them evil witches.

You know, in my job,

you gotta be a good
judge of character.

I got you figured more
like the Glinda, you know,

the good witch of the
west in The Wizard of Oz.

I wouldn't count on it.

You might give me a couple
of shots to shake me up,

but it won't do you no good.

By now, you should know
that I'm a stubborn guy,

and I'd keep coming back.

Also, I'd hand in that report.

Nobody would believe it.

You want to take that risk?

What do you want?

Well, I'm not a greedy man.

Just do over my
apartment, a new car

and some new clothes
for me and my wife.

And you won't tell anyone?

You won't bother us again?

I wouldn't even tell my wife.

You have my word.

That doesn't exactly
fill me with confidence.

Where do you live?

Oh, I'll take you
there right away.

No. No, I'll meet you there.

I have to arrange
for a baby-sitter.

It's on the fifth floor.

Hey, after I leave...

you ain't gonna turn me
into a snake or something,

are you?

That, Mr. Leach, would
be totally redundant.

Charmaine, honey... I'm home.

So, what am I
supposed to do, swirl?

Honey, when you hear
what I've got to say,

you may just do that, baby.

You may just do that.

Oh, swell.

You just ruined
my whole coiffure!

Charmaine, I've just
had the biggest break

of my entire career.

Boy, some life I got.

Can't even go to a hairdresser.

Diamonds and furs
he promises me.

And what do I get?

Broken ends.

So, I'll send you
to the beauty parlor

to have them mended.

Are you kidding?

You couldn't even
afford an estimate.

Charmaine, that's what
I've been trying to tell you.

We're gonna be very, very rich.

You gonna rob a bank?

No.

I've just been assigned
a very important case

by a very important client.

You mean some fink is giving
you a few bucks to spy on his wife.

As a matter of fact,

I'll probably get a
very large retainer.

Now, you get out of here.

This client is coming
over here to see me.

And it's highly confidential.

Where am I gonna go?

I've seen every movie in town.

Here.

Go to the beauty parlor.

Wait a minute.

This is the rent money.

The old lady's been
up three times today,

trying to collect it.

Never mind that.

I told you we're gonna
be rolling in dough.

Charlie... you aren't going
all funny again, are you?

Funny?

Like this morning.

Talking about witches and all.

I was just putting you on.

No. This is strictly legit.

Now, you go out
and enjoy yourself.

When you come
back, just be prepared

for a big surprise.

You're gonna bless the day
that you married Charlie Leach.

You said a surprise...
not a miracle.

H-h-how did you get here?

I didn't come here to
answer silly questions.

Sure, sure.

It's just that I'm
a little curious.

Oh, tell me, do you travel, uh,

sort of like, uh, Batman?

Now, look, Mr. Leach,
let's get one thing straight.

I don't like you.

And I don't like what
you're forcing me to do.

But since I have to
spend time with you,

let's just make it
as short as possible.

Okay, okay. You don't
have to get so huffy.

After all, you're... You're
the first witch I've ever known.

What do you want?

Are you gonna do it now?

Mmm-hmm.

Tell me, are you gonna put
on one of them kooky hats?

Mr. Leach... don't
press your luck.

Now, what is it you wanted?

Well, I told you... new
furniture for the place,

new clothes for me and
Charmaine... and a new car.

Oh.

Alrighty.

Hey, this is really something.

Would you believe
it? Right out of thin air.

Will I be able to get parts?

Oh, I wouldn't worry
about that if I were you.

I'd just enjoy driving it.

Boy, I sure will.

Wait a minute... how
do I get this out of here?

That's your problem.

Lady, we're five stories high.

You better get this out of here.

I'm a witch, not a
parking attendant.

Oh. Uh, who is it?

Mrs. Kratz.

And you're two weeks
overdue with your rent.

I'll give it to you later.

If you think I'm gonna walk
up five flights of stairs again,

you're crazy.

Hey, she better not
find out about this.

You gotta do something.

You're right.

She shouldn't see us together.

That's not what I mean.

Come back. Come back!

I'm coming in.

No. No. Not yet.

And I want that money
today, or out you...

I guess you're
wondering what I'm doing

on the top of this car.

I was just on my way
to answer the door.

There's a car in
the living room.

Yeah. It's brand-new.

How do you like it?

This is a fifth floor walk-up.

You got a car in a
fifth floor walk-up?

Yeah. I haven't got
a garage for it yet.

How did you get
it up them stairs?

Well, I didn't exactly.

I assembled it up here.

Sort of a hobby of mine.

You get this car out of
here, or I'll call the police.

Okay, I'll get it out of here.

How?

Are you gonna drive it
down the fire escape?

Let's let me take care of that.

You better.

That's all I need,
a do-it-yourself nut!

Okay, where are you?

I bet you disappeared
on purpose.

I did it to show you the
problems you can get into

when you're
dealing with a witch.

You sure you don't
want to reconsider?

Now, you put this car down
the street where it belongs.

That's better.

Now, where's the
rest of the stuff?

What first?

My new clothes.

You made them too big.

How am I supposed
to know your size?

Forty two tall.

All right.

Hey. That's better.

Makes me look
like a million dollars.

Huh?

Not even a million dollars

could make you look
like a million dollars.

What style do you
want your apartment?

Expensive.

Boy, oh boy, oh boy.

You got a lot of taste.

Do you know that?

Thanks. You made my whole day.

Lady, I just don't
know how to thank you.

I do.

Just never let me see
or hear from you again.

Here you are, Mr. Stephens.

Oh, thank you, Betty.

How was old Sir Gouch?

Did you have a nice lunch?

Well... I had a peculiar
lunch, Mr. Stephens.

Maybe I shouldn't be
telling you this after all.

I mean, I know you're
not interested in gossip,

even if it does concern you.

Well, that's the only kind
of gossip I am interested in.

Please sit down.

Shall I start right
at the beginning

or jump to the middle?

You may as well start
right at the beginning.

Well, I met Phoebe...
That's a girlfriend of mine...

Phoebe Perkins, for lunch.

Phoebe works for Mr. Barkley

over at the Robbins
Baby Food Company.

Anyway, I thought
I'd try and find out

if you were gonna get the
account or not because...

You thought I'd like to know.

Also, Phoebe has a big mouth,
and I thought she'd tell me.

Anyway, I subtly led the
conversation around to you

and then casually said:

"Hey, Phoebe, is your boss
gonna give my boss the account?"

Well, that certainly
was subtle enough.

What did she say?

Well, that's where we
got to the funny part.

She said it depended
on the investigation.

Investigation?

She just let it slip out,
but I pounced on it.

Evidently her boss,
Mr. Barkley, thinks

that anyone who's
gonna be associated

with Robbins Baby Food

should be completely
wholesome and normal.

That's why they have

a private detective
investigate people.

A private detective?

Betty, are you sure of this?

Yes, sir.

Phoebe's a gossip, but
she's a reliable gossip.

I can't believe it.

Mr. Robbins seemed
like such a nice guy.

Well, I don't know
anything about Mr. Robbins,

but Phoebe says
that little fish eyes...

Uh, that's what
she calls her boss,

Mr. Barkley... Is
a regular Sherlock.

She told me one poor guy
didn't get a job at the company

because his wife had
worked as a cocktail waitress

before they were married.

Uh, what did his wife
have to do with it?

Oh, the wholesome and
normal bit goes for the wife too.

Isn't that silly?

My favorite aunt is
a cocktail waitress.

You're right, Betty.

I never heard of
anything so ridiculous in...

Sam.

I beg your pardon?

A man has been spying on Sam.

Oh, I wouldn't be
upset, Mr. Stephens.

I'm sure she wasn't doing
anything she shouldn't.

Oh, my gosh!

And so, when he threatened
to hand in that report on me,

I agreed to do what he wanted.

Honey, that's blackmail!

I know it is, sweetheart,

but I didn't want to risk
your losing the account.

I don't give a hang
about the account.

Don't you realize how
underhanded it was

for them to spy on us that way?

Well, I did think it
was kind of sneaky.

But I thought maybe
that's how they did things

in your world.

My background
didn't exactly include

a course in business
procedures, you know.

Okay, I can understand that.

But I'm still surprised

you let him push
you around that way.

Honey, when I married
you, I made myself a promise.

Never to let my being a
witch interfere with your career.

Now, do you understand?

That's why I went
along with him.

I'm sorry, honey.

It wasn't your fault.

But I think I should pay a visit
to Mr. Robbins and Mr. Barkley.

Why?

Larry and I both agreed we
wouldn't take the account now,

even if they offered it to us.

And I want the satisfaction

of telling Robbins
and Barkley just that.

I'm gonna go with you.

Why?

I want the pleasure
of being there

when you tell them just that.

Mr. Robbins, I'd
like to point out

that the graph shows that
the trend is very definitely...

I'm sorry, Mr. Barkley,

but Mr. Stephens insisted
on seeing you right away.

Well, Darrin, what
are you doing here?

I have something
to get off my chest.

I think that your hiring
a private detective

to investigate my wife and
me is underhanded, unethical

and an invasion of privacy.

Because of this, I wouldn't
handle your account

even if you offered it to me!

I don't blame you.

You don't?

If what you said was true.

Darrin, whatever
gave you the idea

that we used private detectives?

I hired the detective,
Mr. Robbins.

You did what?

Just good business practice.

Unfortunately, this
particular investigator

didn't work out,
and I dismissed him.

Oh. Why did you do that?

Well...

if you must know, he came
in here with a wild story

about you being
some kind of sorcerer.

Sorceress... if you don't mind.

What?

Well, why use the fancy names
when the plain ones will do.

I much prefer the
simple old term, witch.

Sam!

Mrs. Stephens, this
is no time for levity.

ROBBINS; It certainly isn't.

I'd still like to know why
you thought it necessary

to hire a private detective.

Mr. Robbins, you've got to
learn to protect the company.

How did we know that these
were Robbins Baby Food people?

Because I happen
to like Mr. Stephens.

I also like Mrs. Stephens.

And I don't need any private
detective to tell me that.

Well, you're wrong.

You cannot rely on
your own judgment.

Really?

You hired me, didn't you?

And my ambition is to become
president of this company.

That means that somehow I'm
going to have to get rid of you.

Why did I say that?

I don't know.

But do go on.

Mr. Robbins, I was only kidding.

Just because I had
you investigated too,

and found out some
very interesting things

doesn't mean that I'm
going to use the information.

At least, not until
the time is right.

What am I saying?

I... I don't know
what came over me.

I had this... funny feeling.

That's not unusual, Mr. Barkley.

Most people feel strange
when they've just been fired.

Mr. Robbins!

Get out!

I know it's impossible,
but... someone in this room...

did something to me to
make me say those things.

Barkley, will you please leave.

Now, Mr. and Mrs. Stephens...

if you'll please
accept my apologies...

I'd like to draw up the
contract with your company.

Apology accepted.

Ha.

Here's to the new account.

Uh-huh.

Something the matter?

There is one thing
that bothers me.

It burns me up
when I think of Leach

getting away with
all those things.

Darrin... he doesn't
have to get away with it.

You mean, you could
get the stuff back?

It could be arranged.

It would only take one
short visit with Leach.

I don't know.

I don't like your having
anything to do with that man.

Oh, Darrin, please.

Oh, please.

He wouldn't even see me.

Where did she go?

I'm right here.

I made myself invisible, so
Leach won't even see me.

I guarantee you he
won't bother us again.

May I go?

Honey, I never
thought I'd see the day

when I'd condone witchcraft.

Go ahead. Do your worst.

It'll be a pleasure.

Well, how do you like the place?

You just can't get
over it, can you?

How much did this guy pay you?

Uh, a couple of grand.

A couple of grand?

This stuff must
have cost a fortune.

Charlie... you been holding
something out on me?

Oh, of course not.

I... I just managed to
get it cheap, that's all.

From a fence?

Aw, no, this is strictly
legit, Charmaine.

You see, this guy happens
to run a discount place,

and he took sort
of a liking to me,

and he managed
to give me a deal.

Hm. Funny.

It looks like good stuff.

Of course.

It's the best.

Now, would I give
you anything shoddy?

Open the champagne, Charlie.

Okay.

Get ready for a big pop.

What's this stuff
made of? Balsa wood?

I don't get it.

You and your cheap deals!

I tell you, it's something...

Then, how do you explain that?

Termites?

It's her!

She's in here somewhere!

I know you're in here!

Where are you?!

Where?!

You're out there!

You're out there, aren't you?

Where are you? I
know you're out there!

I knew it.

You've flipped your lid.

If you take this
back, I'll report you!

Where are you?!

Who are you talking to?!

It's the witch, of course!

You better not mess
around with Charlie Leach!

Charmaine, come on! Hurry up!

Is this your idea of a joke?!

She did it again!

The witch?

That's right. Honest.

You gotta believe me.

Charmaine! Charmaine!

Come back!

I'm telling the truth!

Charmaine, come back!

If there's one
thing I can't stand,

it's an Indian giver.

Mr. Leach, haven't you
learned your lesson?

I'll give you one more chance.

If you don't give
me what I want,

I'm gonna hand in that report.

You're bluffing.

I know you've been fired
from the Robbins Company.

Okay, I've been fired.

But why don't you give
me what I want anyway?

Won't it be a lot easier?

No. I don't like blackmailers.

I warn you, I'll
keep coming back

and bugging you until
you give me what I want.

And nothing you
can do can stop me.

We'll see about that.

As we say in old Mexico... Olé!

Ooh.

That ought to hold
him for a while.

Good morning.

Oh, hi, sweetheart.
You ready for breakfast?

You bet. Who was at the door?

Oh, just a man trying
to sell something.

Did you get rid of him?

Yes. I don't think he'll
be bothering us again.

Good.

Oh, she ain't gonna
get rid of me that easy.

When I get back to New York,

I'm gonna pay that
witch lady a visit.