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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,204 --> 00:00:04,614 You almost ready, honey? 2 00:00:04,638 --> 00:00:05,682 Right there. 3 00:00:05,706 --> 00:00:06,916 We don't want to be late. 4 00:00:06,940 --> 00:00:09,086 I promised Larry we'd be there at 7 sharp. 5 00:00:09,110 --> 00:00:11,088 We will be. 6 00:00:11,112 --> 00:00:12,689 I don't mean to rush you, sweetheart. 7 00:00:12,713 --> 00:00:14,257 It's just that it takes women longer 8 00:00:14,281 --> 00:00:15,825 to get dressed than it does men. 9 00:00:15,849 --> 00:00:16,826 Uh-huh. 10 00:00:16,850 --> 00:00:18,895 Oh! And, honey, be particularly nice 11 00:00:18,919 --> 00:00:20,063 to Miss Kabaker, will you? 12 00:00:20,087 --> 00:00:21,865 I'll kill her with kindness. 13 00:00:21,889 --> 00:00:25,034 You know what an important client Mr. Kabaker is. 14 00:00:25,058 --> 00:00:27,137 And his daughter carries a lot of weight with him. 15 00:00:27,161 --> 00:00:28,371 I understand. 16 00:00:28,395 --> 00:00:31,340 So if she has a good time, then he will too. 17 00:00:31,364 --> 00:00:33,376 Of course. 18 00:00:33,400 --> 00:00:36,379 It'll mean a lot to Larry and the agency. 19 00:00:36,403 --> 00:00:37,947 Well, how are you doing, sweetheart? 20 00:00:37,971 --> 00:00:38,948 We better get going. 21 00:00:38,972 --> 00:00:40,772 Oh, I'm hurrying, sweetheart. 22 00:00:42,009 --> 00:00:43,887 Hey, you're getting faster. 23 00:00:43,911 --> 00:00:46,723 I only beat you by a handkerchief. 24 00:00:46,747 --> 00:00:48,325 I saved a lot of time 25 00:00:48,349 --> 00:00:51,261 by taking a shower with my dress on. 26 00:00:51,285 --> 00:00:52,729 Well, let's go. Darrin. 27 00:00:52,753 --> 00:00:53,753 Hm? 28 00:01:48,575 --> 00:01:50,553 Nice party, isn't it? 29 00:01:50,577 --> 00:01:51,955 I'll say. 30 00:01:51,979 --> 00:01:55,225 Another mad whirl with the jet set. 31 00:01:55,249 --> 00:01:57,327 Mind if we borrow you for a moment, J.K.? 32 00:01:57,351 --> 00:01:58,828 Oh, excuse me, dear. 33 00:01:58,852 --> 00:02:01,231 We'll bring your father right back, Miss Kabaker. 34 00:02:01,255 --> 00:02:03,495 It's just a little dull business. 35 00:02:05,359 --> 00:02:06,424 So is this party. 36 00:02:07,427 --> 00:02:09,039 I'm sure it always seems that way 37 00:02:09,063 --> 00:02:10,440 when you don't know many people. 38 00:02:10,464 --> 00:02:12,909 That's why I hate affairs like this. 39 00:02:12,933 --> 00:02:15,511 Just because somebody handles your father's account, 40 00:02:15,535 --> 00:02:18,447 you have to mingle like you had something in common. 41 00:02:18,471 --> 00:02:20,917 It must be very trying. 42 00:02:20,941 --> 00:02:23,653 But you certainly chose a lovely dress for the occasion. 43 00:02:23,677 --> 00:02:27,324 It's not difficult when one has taste, Mrs. Stubbins. 44 00:02:27,348 --> 00:02:30,493 Stephens. 45 00:02:30,517 --> 00:02:33,162 My compliments on your dress, Mrs. Stephens. 46 00:02:33,186 --> 00:02:34,530 Oh, thank you. 47 00:02:34,554 --> 00:02:37,733 It's really difficult to tell those inexpensive copies 48 00:02:37,757 --> 00:02:39,024 from the originals nowadays. 49 00:02:44,498 --> 00:02:47,210 Do you know Dr. Hafta, dear? 50 00:02:47,234 --> 00:02:48,211 I beg your pardon. 51 00:02:48,235 --> 00:02:50,280 Dr. Hafta, the plastic surgeon. 52 00:02:50,304 --> 00:02:51,948 Does beautiful nose work. 53 00:02:51,972 --> 00:02:53,649 No, I don't know him. 54 00:02:53,673 --> 00:02:55,773 It's funny. I could've sworn when you... 55 00:02:57,111 --> 00:02:59,444 Oh, well. Excuse me. 56 00:03:04,485 --> 00:03:05,628 No, thank you. 57 00:03:05,652 --> 00:03:06,932 Uh... 58 00:03:11,625 --> 00:03:13,202 What's the matter, darling? 59 00:03:13,226 --> 00:03:14,804 You look like Darrin just canceled 60 00:03:14,828 --> 00:03:16,305 all your charge accounts. 61 00:03:16,329 --> 00:03:19,042 I shouldn't let it bother me, I guess. 62 00:03:19,066 --> 00:03:21,277 That Miss Kabaker's the most disagreeable 63 00:03:21,301 --> 00:03:23,046 little snob I've ever met. 64 00:03:23,070 --> 00:03:24,547 Well, cheer up! 65 00:03:24,571 --> 00:03:27,317 There's always a sour meatball in the chafing dish. 66 00:03:27,341 --> 00:03:28,539 Maybe she'll get it. 67 00:03:39,920 --> 00:03:41,480 Please? 68 00:03:47,394 --> 00:03:49,438 Have you tried the meatballs? 69 00:03:49,462 --> 00:03:51,607 No, I never eat them myself. 70 00:03:51,631 --> 00:03:53,609 Oh. Heh. 71 00:03:53,633 --> 00:03:57,013 Well, I hope I'll be seeing more of you. 72 00:03:57,037 --> 00:03:59,682 Maybe we could get together for lunch some afternoon. 73 00:03:59,706 --> 00:04:02,173 You think about food a lot, don't you? 74 00:04:03,376 --> 00:04:05,989 Well, no, I... I wish I could be like you. 75 00:04:06,013 --> 00:04:09,814 Carefree, not give a darn what my figure looks like. 76 00:04:16,457 --> 00:04:17,433 Oh! 77 00:04:17,457 --> 00:04:18,434 What's the matter? 78 00:04:18,458 --> 00:04:19,602 You threw it at me! 79 00:04:19,626 --> 00:04:21,237 Oh! Goodness! 80 00:04:21,261 --> 00:04:22,372 Oh! She did it! 81 00:04:22,396 --> 00:04:24,240 She deliberately threw that at me! 82 00:04:24,264 --> 00:04:26,042 Never mind, daughter. I'll take you home. 83 00:04:26,066 --> 00:04:27,210 Really, Larry. 84 00:04:27,234 --> 00:04:28,978 The conduct of some of your guests leaves 85 00:04:29,002 --> 00:04:30,079 a lot to be desired. 86 00:04:30,103 --> 00:04:31,580 I-I-I'm sorry, J.K. 87 00:04:31,604 --> 00:04:33,016 I-I'm sure Mrs. Stephens 88 00:04:33,040 --> 00:04:35,151 wouldn't do anything like that. 89 00:04:35,175 --> 00:04:36,175 It was an accident. 90 00:04:39,079 --> 00:04:40,312 Uh... 91 00:04:48,956 --> 00:04:50,066 "Nothing," she says. 92 00:04:50,090 --> 00:04:52,501 One little favor I ask you to do. 93 00:04:52,525 --> 00:04:53,502 And what do you do? 94 00:04:53,526 --> 00:04:55,004 You wiggle that beak of yours 95 00:04:55,028 --> 00:04:56,461 and really cause trouble! 96 00:04:58,365 --> 00:05:00,076 Ooh! The least you could've done 97 00:05:00,100 --> 00:05:01,510 was ignore her. 98 00:05:01,534 --> 00:05:03,746 You're a great little helpmate, you are. 99 00:05:03,770 --> 00:05:06,749 Always anxious to help your husband's career. 100 00:05:06,773 --> 00:05:11,154 Darrin, you didn't speak to me all the way home in the car. 101 00:05:11,178 --> 00:05:14,690 Would you please show me the same courtesy now? 102 00:05:14,714 --> 00:05:15,691 Gladly. 103 00:05:15,715 --> 00:05:16,835 Good night! 104 00:05:21,321 --> 00:05:22,420 Good night. 105 00:05:27,461 --> 00:05:28,671 And another thing. 106 00:05:28,695 --> 00:05:30,806 I'll tell you when we're not talking. 107 00:05:30,830 --> 00:05:32,397 I wear the pants in this family. 108 00:05:35,468 --> 00:05:36,768 Says you. 109 00:05:40,574 --> 00:05:41,784 Says me! 110 00:05:41,808 --> 00:05:43,674 And I'll say one more thing. 111 00:05:45,545 --> 00:05:46,855 What?! 112 00:05:46,879 --> 00:05:48,346 Now we're not talking! 113 00:05:50,383 --> 00:05:51,716 Now you're talking. 114 00:05:58,091 --> 00:05:59,091 Ooh! 115 00:06:09,068 --> 00:06:10,135 Hi, Larry. 116 00:06:12,439 --> 00:06:15,985 I, uh, guess you're still pretty upset about last night. 117 00:06:16,009 --> 00:06:18,587 I passed "upset" at 3:00 this morning. 118 00:06:18,611 --> 00:06:20,523 Right now, I'm up to homicidal. 119 00:06:20,547 --> 00:06:22,459 Mr. Kabaker was pretty mad last night. 120 00:06:22,483 --> 00:06:24,293 I wonder what he's thinking this morning. 121 00:06:24,317 --> 00:06:26,295 I know what I'm thinking. 122 00:06:26,319 --> 00:06:27,764 But I'm too much of a gentleman 123 00:06:27,788 --> 00:06:29,599 to use certain phrases about a woman. 124 00:06:29,623 --> 00:06:31,801 So let's put it this way. 125 00:06:31,825 --> 00:06:33,970 If I saw that your wife was going to be hit 126 00:06:33,994 --> 00:06:38,307 by a falling safe, I'd just stand there and smile. 127 00:06:38,331 --> 00:06:40,810 Larry, that's not very nice. 128 00:06:40,834 --> 00:06:42,712 I passed "nice" at 2:00 this morning, 129 00:06:42,736 --> 00:06:45,281 right after Kabaker phoned to cancel the account. 130 00:06:45,305 --> 00:06:47,883 Fortunately, I was able to talk him out of it. 131 00:06:47,907 --> 00:06:49,786 Well, I'm sorry about that, Larry, 132 00:06:49,810 --> 00:06:51,888 but Sam was provoked into doing what she did. 133 00:06:51,912 --> 00:06:53,756 It was thoughtless and inexcusable! 134 00:06:53,780 --> 00:06:55,157 A child would've had more sense. 135 00:06:55,181 --> 00:06:56,559 Wait a minute! 136 00:06:56,583 --> 00:06:58,394 Kabaker's daughter deserved it. 137 00:06:58,418 --> 00:07:00,063 She's a sarcastic snob. 138 00:07:00,087 --> 00:07:01,831 And her father ought to wash out her mouth 139 00:07:01,855 --> 00:07:03,800 with some of that crummy detergent he makes. 140 00:07:03,824 --> 00:07:06,970 That crummy detergent happens to keep us in business. 141 00:07:06,994 --> 00:07:09,272 Sure, Miss Kabaker can do no wrong 142 00:07:09,296 --> 00:07:11,340 as long as her father's got wall-to-wall money! 143 00:07:11,364 --> 00:07:12,776 If you were a billionaire, 144 00:07:12,800 --> 00:07:14,477 Samantha still acted like a child! 145 00:07:14,501 --> 00:07:15,812 Oh, yeah?! Yeah! 146 00:07:15,836 --> 00:07:17,881 At least she could've used a little discretion, 147 00:07:17,905 --> 00:07:18,881 like my wife. 148 00:07:18,905 --> 00:07:19,905 Larry. 149 00:07:21,007 --> 00:07:23,385 I've got news for you. 150 00:07:23,409 --> 00:07:26,989 That wife of yours has come up with a few nuggets herself. 151 00:07:27,013 --> 00:07:28,157 Oh, really? 152 00:07:28,181 --> 00:07:29,826 I mean, if we're talking about boners, 153 00:07:29,850 --> 00:07:31,527 let's get all the names on the list. 154 00:07:31,551 --> 00:07:34,797 Name me just one boner that Louise ever pulled. Just one. 155 00:07:34,821 --> 00:07:36,065 There was the time she thought 156 00:07:36,089 --> 00:07:37,533 the client's wife was his mother, 157 00:07:37,557 --> 00:07:39,335 the time she forgot the theater tickets, 158 00:07:39,359 --> 00:07:40,658 and... I said one. 159 00:07:43,229 --> 00:07:45,608 So don't go making cracks about my wife. 160 00:07:45,632 --> 00:07:48,299 Just worry about that cuckoo that you're married to. 161 00:07:50,136 --> 00:07:52,181 Well, if Louise is such a drag, 162 00:07:52,205 --> 00:07:54,417 you don't have to associate with her anymore. 163 00:07:54,441 --> 00:07:55,585 Agreed. 164 00:07:55,609 --> 00:07:58,387 And you can consider Samantha off-limits too. 165 00:07:58,411 --> 00:08:00,957 In fact you don't have to associate with me anymore. 166 00:08:00,981 --> 00:08:04,227 Well, let's add my vote to that proposal 167 00:08:04,251 --> 00:08:05,728 and make it unanimous! 168 00:08:05,752 --> 00:08:06,829 Great! 169 00:08:06,853 --> 00:08:07,997 You keep your big, flat feet 170 00:08:08,021 --> 00:08:09,064 out of my office, 171 00:08:09,088 --> 00:08:10,433 and I'll keep mine out of yours. 172 00:08:10,457 --> 00:08:11,867 I'll go you one better. 173 00:08:11,891 --> 00:08:14,270 I'll keep my feet and everything that's attached to them 174 00:08:14,294 --> 00:08:15,471 out of the entire building! 175 00:08:15,495 --> 00:08:17,507 I quit! Good! 176 00:08:17,531 --> 00:08:19,441 You just saved me two weeks' severance pay. 177 00:08:19,465 --> 00:08:20,442 Cheap. 178 00:08:20,466 --> 00:08:21,565 Cheap! Cheap! 179 00:08:32,946 --> 00:08:33,946 Hi. 180 00:08:35,182 --> 00:08:36,425 I thought I heard you come in. 181 00:08:36,449 --> 00:08:37,827 What are you doing home so early? 182 00:08:37,851 --> 00:08:39,428 I got sick. 183 00:08:39,452 --> 00:08:40,663 Sick? 184 00:08:40,687 --> 00:08:43,333 Of working. I quit! 185 00:08:43,357 --> 00:08:44,968 Quit? 186 00:08:44,992 --> 00:08:45,969 Quit! 187 00:08:45,993 --> 00:08:47,570 Evacuated the premises! 188 00:08:47,594 --> 00:08:50,473 Ceased working! Hit the road! 189 00:08:50,497 --> 00:08:52,408 What happened? 190 00:08:52,432 --> 00:08:54,744 Oh, I shouldn't be telling you this. 191 00:08:54,768 --> 00:08:55,745 Why not? 192 00:08:55,769 --> 00:08:58,169 Because we're not talking! 193 00:08:58,605 --> 00:09:02,651 Well, if we were talking, 194 00:09:02,675 --> 00:09:06,189 did it have anything to do with what happened last night? 195 00:09:06,213 --> 00:09:07,857 Well, Larry and I got into an argument, 196 00:09:07,881 --> 00:09:10,659 and he said some things about you I didn't like. 197 00:09:10,683 --> 00:09:13,129 You said some pretty unkind things about me yourself. 198 00:09:13,153 --> 00:09:14,998 That's different. I'm your husband. 199 00:09:15,022 --> 00:09:16,900 Well, I appreciate your defending me. 200 00:09:16,924 --> 00:09:18,634 But whatever he said, he was right. 201 00:09:18,658 --> 00:09:20,069 And so are you. 202 00:09:20,093 --> 00:09:22,605 I should've had more control last night. 203 00:09:22,629 --> 00:09:25,275 Well, Kabaker's daughter deserved it. 204 00:09:25,299 --> 00:09:26,909 Well, I still could've ignored her. 205 00:09:26,933 --> 00:09:29,078 I wouldn't let you ignore her. 206 00:09:29,102 --> 00:09:30,413 You did the right thing. 207 00:09:30,437 --> 00:09:34,917 Darrin, when you pick a side, will you please stick with it? 208 00:09:34,941 --> 00:09:36,318 Now, it's all over and done with. 209 00:09:36,342 --> 00:09:37,987 I've already got another job lined up, 210 00:09:38,011 --> 00:09:39,789 and I've got to hurry over to an interview. 211 00:09:39,813 --> 00:09:41,390 Another job? 212 00:09:41,414 --> 00:09:43,025 Darrin, that's ridiculous. 213 00:09:43,049 --> 00:09:44,193 Ridiculous? 214 00:09:44,217 --> 00:09:46,162 The Ames Advertising has had feelers out for me 215 00:09:46,186 --> 00:09:47,229 for a long time. 216 00:09:47,253 --> 00:09:48,464 Well, they're gonna get me. 217 00:09:48,488 --> 00:09:49,932 I hope you don't get it. 218 00:09:51,625 --> 00:09:52,935 I can't miss. 219 00:09:52,959 --> 00:09:55,399 I'm the perfect man for the job. 220 00:09:57,363 --> 00:09:59,275 Louise, it's ridiculous. 221 00:09:59,299 --> 00:10:01,411 Larry and Darrin are simply being stubborn. 222 00:10:01,435 --> 00:10:03,613 Now, we have to figure out a way to get them together. 223 00:10:03,637 --> 00:10:04,647 Agreed. 224 00:10:04,671 --> 00:10:06,682 Larry always did have a stubborn streak. 225 00:10:06,706 --> 00:10:08,183 Like when we were dating, 226 00:10:08,207 --> 00:10:09,685 I knew that if I was the first 227 00:10:09,709 --> 00:10:12,354 to mention the word "marriage," I was dead. 228 00:10:12,378 --> 00:10:14,590 How'd you finally get the idea across? 229 00:10:14,614 --> 00:10:16,191 Well, one night he blew a smoke ring, 230 00:10:16,215 --> 00:10:18,093 I stuck my finger through it and said, "I do." 231 00:10:19,719 --> 00:10:22,231 Oh, men are such little boys, really. 232 00:10:22,255 --> 00:10:23,832 They don't know what's good for them. 233 00:10:23,856 --> 00:10:26,536 Right. And it's up to us to show them that 234 00:10:26,560 --> 00:10:29,205 they can live happy, contented lives, 235 00:10:29,229 --> 00:10:30,673 even if it makes them miserable. 236 00:10:30,697 --> 00:10:33,142 So how do we get our two mules together 237 00:10:33,166 --> 00:10:34,610 when they're not even talking? 238 00:10:34,634 --> 00:10:36,278 Do you have any ideas? 239 00:10:36,302 --> 00:10:38,147 Mm-hm. 240 00:10:38,171 --> 00:10:40,683 Oh, it's very simple, really. 241 00:10:40,707 --> 00:10:44,353 The way to unite people is to give them a common enemy. 242 00:10:44,377 --> 00:10:45,921 Oh, I'll buy that. 243 00:10:45,945 --> 00:10:50,626 Now, in Darrin and Larry's case, the common enemy will be us. 244 00:10:50,650 --> 00:10:52,294 Us? 245 00:10:52,318 --> 00:10:54,196 You mean a war of the sexes? 246 00:10:54,220 --> 00:10:57,000 Oh, no, no. Not an all-out war. 247 00:10:57,024 --> 00:10:58,635 Just a skirmish. 248 00:10:58,659 --> 00:11:00,569 We'll not only get them together, 249 00:11:00,593 --> 00:11:02,038 we'll teach them a lesson. 250 00:11:02,062 --> 00:11:03,272 So, what's your plan? 251 00:11:03,296 --> 00:11:04,874 I can't wait to hear it. 252 00:11:04,898 --> 00:11:07,910 Well... Oh, I just had a terrible thought. 253 00:11:07,934 --> 00:11:08,911 What? 254 00:11:08,935 --> 00:11:10,113 It's too late. 255 00:11:10,137 --> 00:11:12,103 You said Darrin was taking that other job. 256 00:11:13,906 --> 00:11:18,354 Oh, um... I wouldn't worry about that. 257 00:11:18,378 --> 00:11:20,622 Darrin doesn't have a chance of landing that job 258 00:11:20,646 --> 00:11:22,058 with Ames Advertising. 259 00:11:22,082 --> 00:11:23,915 How can you be so sure? 260 00:11:26,352 --> 00:11:27,385 I'm a witch. 261 00:11:28,421 --> 00:11:30,454 You said it, honey. I didn't. 262 00:11:32,893 --> 00:11:34,025 How about that? 263 00:11:39,432 --> 00:11:43,946 Well... Stephens, I'm very glad you could get in to see us. 264 00:11:43,970 --> 00:11:45,347 Was the traffic bad? 265 00:11:45,371 --> 00:11:47,550 No. Actually I came in on the choo-choo. 266 00:11:47,574 --> 00:11:48,884 Choo-choo? 267 00:11:48,908 --> 00:11:51,520 I meant, the train. 268 00:11:51,544 --> 00:11:53,322 I hadn't eaten, so it gave me a chance 269 00:11:53,346 --> 00:11:55,480 to relax and, uh, have my din-din. 270 00:11:58,485 --> 00:12:00,329 Ah, I see. 271 00:12:00,353 --> 00:12:03,899 Uh, food's really quite good. 272 00:12:03,923 --> 00:12:05,768 'Course nobody can cook like my mummy... 273 00:12:05,792 --> 00:12:07,892 Mommy... Mother. 274 00:12:10,029 --> 00:12:12,530 Uh... She really knows how to fill your tum-tum. 275 00:12:14,033 --> 00:12:15,600 Yes. 276 00:12:17,136 --> 00:12:20,849 Stephens, your credentials are most impressive. 277 00:12:20,873 --> 00:12:23,552 You know, I always say 278 00:12:23,576 --> 00:12:25,421 that all horses have teeth and a tail. 279 00:12:25,445 --> 00:12:28,846 But it's that old track record that makes thoroughbreds. 280 00:12:30,750 --> 00:12:31,727 Stephens? 281 00:12:31,751 --> 00:12:32,728 Mm? 282 00:12:32,752 --> 00:12:34,352 What are you doing? 283 00:12:40,727 --> 00:12:42,259 I'm sucking my thumb. 284 00:12:44,030 --> 00:12:45,129 Sucking your thumb. 285 00:12:47,033 --> 00:12:49,934 Uh, yes, I've always sucked my thumb when I'm afraid. 286 00:12:52,906 --> 00:12:54,082 You're joking. 287 00:12:54,106 --> 00:12:55,083 Oh, no, no. 288 00:12:55,107 --> 00:12:56,807 I wish I had my teddy bear. 289 00:12:59,979 --> 00:13:03,559 Mr. Stephens, I'm sorry, but this interview is over. 290 00:13:03,583 --> 00:13:05,694 Oh, oh, Mr. Ames, I-I-I don't know what to say. 291 00:13:05,718 --> 00:13:06,695 This isn't me! 292 00:13:06,719 --> 00:13:07,730 I don't care! 293 00:13:07,754 --> 00:13:09,799 Whoever it is, his interview is at an end! 294 00:13:09,823 --> 00:13:12,134 Mr. Ames, please, if you'll just let me explain. 295 00:13:12,158 --> 00:13:14,398 There's some reason for this going on... 296 00:13:18,932 --> 00:13:20,910 I made a boo-boo. 297 00:13:20,934 --> 00:13:23,479 Get out of my sight! 298 00:13:23,503 --> 00:13:24,747 Mr. Ames, uh, 299 00:13:24,771 --> 00:13:27,149 it's like some strange force got ahold of me. 300 00:13:27,173 --> 00:13:30,619 It's... Uh... Samantha! 301 00:13:30,643 --> 00:13:31,643 Out! 302 00:13:36,716 --> 00:13:38,482 I believe this is yours. 303 00:13:54,801 --> 00:14:00,048 ♪ Rock-a-bye baby On a tree top ♪ 304 00:14:00,072 --> 00:14:04,386 ♪ When the wind blows The cradle will rock ♪ 305 00:14:04,410 --> 00:14:05,955 Samantha! 306 00:14:08,014 --> 00:14:13,095 ♪ I have a strong feeling Bad words will fly ♪ 307 00:14:13,119 --> 00:14:18,322 ♪ Your daddy just came home With blood in his eyes ♪ 308 00:14:19,392 --> 00:14:21,904 Samantha, where are you?! 309 00:14:21,928 --> 00:14:25,875 Well, Tabatha, time for beddy-bye. 310 00:14:25,899 --> 00:14:28,644 Now, I'm gonna do something to your daddy 311 00:14:28,668 --> 00:14:31,547 that you're too little to understand. 312 00:14:31,571 --> 00:14:33,616 But it's for his own good. 313 00:14:33,640 --> 00:14:34,920 Sam! 314 00:14:36,543 --> 00:14:37,543 Wish me luck. 315 00:14:43,550 --> 00:14:45,494 Sam, where are you?! Come out here and face me! 316 00:14:45,518 --> 00:14:46,629 Yes? 317 00:14:46,653 --> 00:14:48,631 You've been sticking that magic nose of yours 318 00:14:48,655 --> 00:14:50,833 where it doesn't belong again. Don't try to deny it! 319 00:14:50,857 --> 00:14:52,200 All right, I won't. 320 00:14:52,224 --> 00:14:54,402 Come on, Sam, don't make me drag it outta you. 321 00:14:54,426 --> 00:14:57,039 Just... You admit it? 322 00:14:57,063 --> 00:14:58,707 I only did it to save you 323 00:14:58,731 --> 00:15:00,876 from making the biggest mistake of your life. 324 00:15:00,900 --> 00:15:03,578 That I did on a day long ago, 325 00:15:03,602 --> 00:15:06,115 which we now laughingly call our anniversary. 326 00:15:06,139 --> 00:15:07,649 Go ahead. Rave on. 327 00:15:07,673 --> 00:15:09,718 Let me know when the steam comes out of your nose. 328 00:15:09,742 --> 00:15:11,120 You can help me with the ironing. 329 00:15:11,144 --> 00:15:13,589 When will you learn to stop meddling in my business? 330 00:15:13,613 --> 00:15:16,358 When you learn to conduct it better. 331 00:15:16,382 --> 00:15:18,494 Oh, well, I can't be doing too bad. 332 00:15:18,518 --> 00:15:21,530 You've got a lovely house, a nice car, lovely clothes. 333 00:15:21,554 --> 00:15:24,833 But to you, I suppose, I'm still a big dumb-head! 334 00:15:24,857 --> 00:15:26,001 I didn't say that. 335 00:15:26,025 --> 00:15:27,970 But you're thinking it. Go ahead. Out with it. 336 00:15:27,994 --> 00:15:29,805 Oh, really, Darrin. Go ahead. Say it. 337 00:15:29,829 --> 00:15:31,173 Okay. 338 00:15:31,197 --> 00:15:32,908 You're a big dumb-head! 339 00:15:32,932 --> 00:15:34,910 You're calling me names now. 340 00:15:34,934 --> 00:15:37,146 Well, when you talk like that, you are a dumb-head. 341 00:15:37,170 --> 00:15:38,413 And I'll tell you one more... 342 00:15:38,437 --> 00:15:39,448 Hold it! Hold it! 343 00:15:39,472 --> 00:15:40,582 Stop the world. 344 00:15:40,606 --> 00:15:42,785 We are about to get the word from the high lama. 345 00:15:42,809 --> 00:15:45,687 If you had any sense at all, you would get down on your hands 346 00:15:45,711 --> 00:15:47,689 and knees and crawl back to Larry Tate 347 00:15:47,713 --> 00:15:49,091 and beg his forgiveness. 348 00:15:49,115 --> 00:15:50,726 Me, crawl? 349 00:15:50,750 --> 00:15:53,396 Well, we both know that without him you'd be nothing. 350 00:15:53,420 --> 00:15:55,264 He taught you everything you know. 351 00:15:55,288 --> 00:15:56,598 He taught me? 352 00:15:56,622 --> 00:15:58,433 Well, that does it! That really does it! 353 00:15:58,457 --> 00:16:00,268 If you'll excuse me, I have to fix dinner. 354 00:16:00,292 --> 00:16:02,071 Well, don't bother setting a place for me, 355 00:16:02,095 --> 00:16:03,238 because I'll be eating out. 356 00:16:03,262 --> 00:16:04,906 Good. More for me. 357 00:16:04,930 --> 00:16:07,343 And don't bother turning down my side of the bed, 358 00:16:07,367 --> 00:16:09,132 because I'll be sleeping on the sofa. 359 00:16:12,772 --> 00:16:15,851 As long as you're eating out, why don't you sleep out too. 360 00:16:15,875 --> 00:16:17,252 What? 361 00:16:17,276 --> 00:16:18,687 Sam, this isn't like you. 362 00:16:18,711 --> 00:16:20,088 It is now. 363 00:16:20,112 --> 00:16:23,058 Well, then I'll do just that. 364 00:16:23,082 --> 00:16:25,828 As of now, my address is the club. 365 00:16:25,852 --> 00:16:27,629 What do you think of that? 366 00:16:27,653 --> 00:16:30,199 I think I better call you a cab. 367 00:16:30,223 --> 00:16:32,703 I'll need the car for shopping. 368 00:16:38,264 --> 00:16:39,264 Louise? 369 00:16:40,667 --> 00:16:41,799 Anybody home? 370 00:16:48,641 --> 00:16:50,486 Hi, dear. 371 00:16:50,510 --> 00:16:51,720 I know all about it. 372 00:16:51,744 --> 00:16:53,589 I spoke to Samantha. 373 00:16:53,613 --> 00:16:55,191 Figures. 374 00:16:55,215 --> 00:16:56,692 You know, it's none of my business, 375 00:16:56,716 --> 00:16:59,094 but I think you're being stubborn about this whole thing. 376 00:16:59,118 --> 00:17:00,095 I agree. 377 00:17:00,119 --> 00:17:01,430 That you're being stubborn? 378 00:17:01,454 --> 00:17:03,974 That it's none of your business. 379 00:17:05,191 --> 00:17:06,902 You got a bicarbonate? 380 00:17:06,926 --> 00:17:08,837 I've got a knot in my stomach. 381 00:17:08,861 --> 00:17:11,073 You've also got one in your head. 382 00:17:11,097 --> 00:17:14,109 Well, I've got news for you, tinted top. 383 00:17:14,133 --> 00:17:16,345 I run my business the way I see fit. 384 00:17:16,369 --> 00:17:19,882 And I don't need any suggestions from the corset crowd. 385 00:17:19,906 --> 00:17:22,206 Be my guest, Snow White. 386 00:17:24,743 --> 00:17:28,257 And let me drop another thought on your pointed little ears. 387 00:17:28,281 --> 00:17:30,693 Some men are fortunate enough to have wives 388 00:17:30,717 --> 00:17:33,429 that are understanding and sympathetic. 389 00:17:33,453 --> 00:17:35,598 After a hard day in the rat race, 390 00:17:35,622 --> 00:17:39,167 they don't have to come home to a mouse that roars. 391 00:17:39,191 --> 00:17:42,471 I believe the last word is my prerogative. 392 00:17:42,495 --> 00:17:44,473 So I'll take it. 393 00:17:44,497 --> 00:17:48,210 If I were you, I'd crawl to Darrin on my hands and knees 394 00:17:48,234 --> 00:17:50,345 and beg his forgiveness. 395 00:17:50,369 --> 00:17:51,680 Me, crawl? 396 00:17:51,704 --> 00:17:53,315 Oh, come on, Larry. 397 00:17:53,339 --> 00:17:55,283 We both know it's his brilliant mind 398 00:17:55,307 --> 00:17:57,119 that made you everything you are today. 399 00:17:57,143 --> 00:17:58,843 Without him, you'd be nothing. 400 00:17:59,646 --> 00:18:01,490 Are you serious? 401 00:18:01,514 --> 00:18:02,958 Well, let's face it. 402 00:18:02,982 --> 00:18:04,526 I married you, Larry, but you're not 403 00:18:04,550 --> 00:18:06,017 the smartest man in the world. 404 00:18:07,620 --> 00:18:08,597 Louise. 405 00:18:08,621 --> 00:18:10,232 Yes? 406 00:18:10,256 --> 00:18:11,466 Louise. 407 00:18:11,490 --> 00:18:14,058 You want to try for double or nothing on my last name? 408 00:18:17,496 --> 00:18:20,009 The discussion is at an end. 409 00:18:20,033 --> 00:18:22,144 Fine. I'll get dinner. 410 00:18:22,168 --> 00:18:24,335 Or would you prefer to eat out? 411 00:18:25,638 --> 00:18:27,950 That's the best idea you've had in years. 412 00:18:27,974 --> 00:18:29,552 Nag, nag, nag. 413 00:18:29,576 --> 00:18:31,120 Yackety-yak-yak. 414 00:18:31,144 --> 00:18:32,621 Well, if you feel that way about it, 415 00:18:32,645 --> 00:18:33,622 you'd be better off 416 00:18:33,646 --> 00:18:35,191 where you can't hear my voice at all. 417 00:18:35,215 --> 00:18:37,193 Louise, you're driving me to the club. 418 00:18:37,217 --> 00:18:39,395 I don't have time. 419 00:18:39,419 --> 00:18:40,596 Here are your keys. 420 00:18:40,620 --> 00:18:41,919 Drive yourself. 421 00:18:55,502 --> 00:18:56,611 Desk. 422 00:18:56,635 --> 00:18:59,148 Could you tell me if Mr. Darrin Stephens 423 00:18:59,172 --> 00:19:01,216 has checked in yet? 424 00:19:01,240 --> 00:19:02,484 He has. 425 00:19:02,508 --> 00:19:04,252 Ah. What room is he in? 426 00:19:04,276 --> 00:19:05,453 He's in 909. 427 00:19:05,477 --> 00:19:06,688 Would you like me to ring him? 428 00:19:06,712 --> 00:19:09,324 Oh, no. No, don't bother. 429 00:19:09,348 --> 00:19:13,228 Oh, Mr. Larry Tate will be arriving very soon. 430 00:19:13,252 --> 00:19:15,353 I'm sure you'll make him comfortable. 431 00:19:20,693 --> 00:19:22,959 Eddie, can I have a room for the night? 432 00:19:25,231 --> 00:19:27,276 Yes, sir, Mr. Tate. Room 909. 433 00:19:27,300 --> 00:19:28,577 I'll ring for a bellboy. 434 00:19:28,601 --> 00:19:29,733 Don't bother. 435 00:21:22,248 --> 00:21:23,225 Larry! 436 00:21:23,249 --> 00:21:24,259 What are you doing here? 437 00:21:24,283 --> 00:21:26,028 I might ask you the same question. 438 00:21:26,052 --> 00:21:27,228 It's none of your business. 439 00:21:27,252 --> 00:21:28,964 Obviously they got our rooms mixed up. 440 00:21:28,988 --> 00:21:30,132 I'll get another one. 441 00:21:30,156 --> 00:21:32,000 Don't tell me you had a fight with Louise. 442 00:21:32,024 --> 00:21:33,635 That's my business. 443 00:21:33,659 --> 00:21:35,336 I suppose you had a fight with Samantha. 444 00:21:35,360 --> 00:21:36,672 That's my business! 445 00:21:36,696 --> 00:21:38,173 What's the matter with you, Larry? 446 00:21:38,197 --> 00:21:40,275 How could you walk out on a great girl like Louise? 447 00:21:40,299 --> 00:21:42,144 And how could you run out on a marvelous girl 448 00:21:42,168 --> 00:21:43,344 like Samantha? 449 00:21:43,368 --> 00:21:45,781 I thought you didn't like Samantha. 450 00:21:45,805 --> 00:21:47,248 I thought you didn't like Louise. 451 00:21:47,272 --> 00:21:49,450 What gave you that idea? Your big mouth. 452 00:21:49,474 --> 00:21:50,986 I only said those things in anger. 453 00:21:51,010 --> 00:21:52,554 You should've known that. So did I. 454 00:21:52,578 --> 00:21:54,122 And if you weren't so thick-headed, 455 00:21:54,146 --> 00:21:55,645 you'd know I'm crazy about Sam. 456 00:21:59,051 --> 00:22:01,663 Larry, we're a couple of numskulls. 457 00:22:02,822 --> 00:22:03,921 You said it. 458 00:22:06,258 --> 00:22:09,193 I'm sorry, Lar... I'm sorry... 459 00:22:11,563 --> 00:22:13,709 Well, now we can enjoy 460 00:22:13,733 --> 00:22:15,610 our newfound bachelorhood together. 461 00:22:15,634 --> 00:22:16,978 Right. 462 00:22:17,002 --> 00:22:19,314 Ah, freedom! It's wonderful! 463 00:22:19,338 --> 00:22:20,582 It's marvelous! 464 00:22:20,606 --> 00:22:21,783 Do anything we want. 465 00:22:21,807 --> 00:22:23,318 No one to answer to. 466 00:22:23,342 --> 00:22:25,053 Play poker. Go bowling. 467 00:22:25,077 --> 00:22:26,221 Golf every weekend. 468 00:22:26,245 --> 00:22:27,422 More time at the club. 469 00:22:27,446 --> 00:22:28,446 Yeah. 470 00:22:33,619 --> 00:22:36,898 I hate poker and bowling. 471 00:22:36,922 --> 00:22:39,634 Golf gives me the hives. 472 00:22:39,658 --> 00:22:40,824 This place is depressing. 473 00:22:46,531 --> 00:22:47,531 Darrin? 474 00:22:48,700 --> 00:22:49,780 Yeah? 475 00:22:51,937 --> 00:22:53,570 Are you thinking what I'm thinking? 476 00:22:54,940 --> 00:22:56,985 I think so. 477 00:22:57,009 --> 00:22:59,810 Last one packed pays for the room! 478 00:23:07,420 --> 00:23:09,030 Wouldn't you know it. Louise's car. 479 00:23:09,054 --> 00:23:10,064 Figures. 480 00:23:10,088 --> 00:23:11,833 She was miserable at home without me. 481 00:23:11,857 --> 00:23:13,168 Poor kids. Hm. 482 00:23:13,192 --> 00:23:14,969 Must be crying on each other's shoulders. 483 00:23:17,497 --> 00:23:18,474 Oh, thanks, Larry. 484 00:23:18,498 --> 00:23:19,498 You're welcome. 485 00:23:22,468 --> 00:23:24,078 Well, look who's back. 486 00:23:24,102 --> 00:23:25,202 The freedom fighters. 487 00:23:27,206 --> 00:23:28,383 Have some champagne. 488 00:23:28,407 --> 00:23:29,717 We're celebrating. 489 00:23:29,741 --> 00:23:31,753 Louise, we're going home. 490 00:23:31,777 --> 00:23:32,954 Oh, really, Larry. 491 00:23:32,978 --> 00:23:34,189 Louise. 492 00:23:34,213 --> 00:23:37,459 Tsk. Nag, nag, nag. 493 00:23:37,483 --> 00:23:38,893 Louise... Yeah. 494 00:23:38,917 --> 00:23:40,362 Don't forget your Ouija board. 495 00:23:40,386 --> 00:23:41,997 Wasn't that fun? Fascinating. 496 00:23:42,021 --> 00:23:43,301 Good night, Samantha. 497 00:23:44,657 --> 00:23:45,634 Night, Darrin. 498 00:23:45,658 --> 00:23:47,135 Night, Larry. Louise. 499 00:23:47,159 --> 00:23:49,399 Night, Samantha. Night, Larry. 500 00:23:54,333 --> 00:23:57,813 Did I just detect a sly smile on your upper lip? 501 00:23:57,837 --> 00:23:58,814 Smile? 502 00:23:58,838 --> 00:24:00,149 It suddenly occurs to me 503 00:24:00,173 --> 00:24:01,583 that it's more than coincidence 504 00:24:01,607 --> 00:24:03,886 that Larry and I left our houses at the same time 505 00:24:03,910 --> 00:24:05,153 and ended up in the same room. 506 00:24:05,177 --> 00:24:07,355 Stranger things have happened. 507 00:24:07,379 --> 00:24:09,157 Especially in this house. 508 00:24:09,181 --> 00:24:10,659 And I'll tell you something else. 509 00:24:10,683 --> 00:24:14,429 If you've been meddling with your witchcraft again... 510 00:24:14,453 --> 00:24:16,164 I couldn't care less. 511 00:24:16,188 --> 00:24:18,066 Now, let me tell you something. 512 00:24:18,090 --> 00:24:20,835 If you think you can walk back through that door 513 00:24:20,859 --> 00:24:21,836 and all is forgiven, 514 00:24:21,860 --> 00:24:24,328 you're absolutely... right. 515 00:24:28,267 --> 00:24:31,246 Sam, isn't it amazing how stupid a man can be? 516 00:24:32,738 --> 00:24:33,715 Oh, yes. 517 00:24:33,739 --> 00:24:35,617 You certainly were, sweetheart. 518 00:24:35,641 --> 00:24:37,041 I meant Larry. 35749

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