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LAUGHTER You're really bad at this.
Missed.
There we go.
Don't reach my head.
Did that hurt? Ow.
Stop it.
Oh, you worried about your beautiful hair.
You missed again. Don't worry. It's bad.
Ten points if you hit Lamballe.
Your aim is terrible.
You're cheating.
Get off!
Let go. SHE YELPS
What...?
Toinette!
Oh, my God.
Louis, what are you waiting for?
Jump. Oh, dear.
It's your fault, you idiot.
SHE GASPS
Oh, thank goodness.
Oh, God.
Are you OK? Are you OK?
I'm fine.
Thank you.
Oh, welcome.
Welcome to Fontainebleau, my children.
And especially to our little Dauphine,
who I am delighted to see has recovered from her ordeal.
Now that we are here on holiday, we can forget protocol.
We are here to relax, have fun.
And once again, our Orleans cousin here,
will take charge of the fete champetre.
We will have the great pleasure of entertaining our villagers.
Any ideas, Chartres?
This year, the theme will be...
..Merry England. Oh!
My good friend, the Prince of Wales, has been advising me.
It will be charmant - the perfect opportunity
to entertain our new princess, Provence's future wife,
when she arrives.
Come in.
How are you settling in?
Who needs Madame Etiqutte?
It appears that you do.
Oh.
LAUGHTER I'm teaching Julie to be a lady's maid.
First impressions of Fontainebleau?
It's heaven.
Heaven compared to Versailles.
It's a nice break from routine.
Yes.
But we have a problem.
This is Louis's bedchamber.
As you can see, it has fallen off the schedule of works.
So what? He doesn't visit me at Versailles.
His position may not have altered.
Yours has.
Has Provence's wife been chosen?
Not yet.
But the quicker your husband moves in, the better.
Bypass the formalities.
What formalities?
Madame du Barry is in charge of refurbishments.
I will speak to Papa Roi.
Don't you think it's time we made peace with the Countess?
I won't be pushed around by her.
You can't win this battle.
She has declared war on me, Mercy.
I shan't be the one to surrender.
Miss Saxony.
Dark and mysterious.
Sardinia.
Big chest, no chin.
HE GROANS
HE PANTS
Miss Savoy.
Is that a shadow, or dirt, or a moustache?
That's original.
Miss Spain, you are lovely.
You're perfect.
I'm thinking of marrying a Spanish princess.
Out of the question.
Why? There is only one house you should consider,
and that is... ..the House of Savoy.
Why should I listen to you, Mesdames?
You cannot let her choose for you.
What's so special about Savoy?
Josephine was your mother's first choice for Louis.
Choiseul foisted the Austrian bitch on us
after she passed away.
BOTH: God rest her soul.
Shall I tell them now?
Yes, yes.
I'd like to propose a toast to the Spanish princess,
Provence's future bride.
My turn.
To the princess of Savoy.
Why are you toasting her?
Well, I've chosen Josephine to be my wife.
Yeah?
She is my cousin.
Mesdames, tell me that Josephine is the princess
my brother should have married.
Is it true?
You're making me feel rather giddy, Provence.
Do sit down.
A royal marriage must be entered into only
with careful consideration.
I've made my choice. Sit!
You will ask your brother for his permission.
Eat.
Rohan, welcome to Vienna.
Emperor?
Joseph, please.
We don't use formal titles here.
Quite a contrast to Versailles.
I'll take that as a compliment.
How's my little sister?
A handful.
Well, come and meet her mother.
Mother?
Louis de Rohan, our new French ambassador.
It is an honour to meet you, Empress.
Why is he dressed as a clown?
France is our ally, ma.
Allies don't garrison their troops on our border.
When are you going to remove them, ambassador?
I'm waiting to receive instructions
from the Prime Minister.
That's what you call d'Aiguillon?
We call him du Barry's toy boy.
Ma.
How did you wrangle your position?
Madame Du Barry recommended me to the king.
Another stooge.
Perhaps we should ask du Barry for her permission
to invade Poland.
The king will decide in his own time.
Who should I report to?
Me.
But my son may rule with me, Rohan.
I do rule with you, Ma.
I call the shots.
Where are you off to, France?
Breakfast.
Will you be back for tea?
Don't be so clingy, my love.
It's really not your style.
Well, perhaps you could ask her to show me
just a teensy bit of respect.
Papa Roi?
May I come in?
SHE YAWNS
Try this one.
It's delicious.
SHE LAUGHS
Mama.
Mama won't allow me.
Where is Mama?
I don't see her.
Mama?
Come out of hiding, Empress.
Come on, I want a word with you.
Thank you.
Thank you, Papa Roi.
Come with me.
This is Louis's apartment.
Where is he sleeping?
The West Wing.
I'll deal with that.
Come here.
Will you do me a favour, little Dauphine?
Will you be polite to the Countess?
Make life easier for both of us.
SHE GASPS
Oh!
It's cold.
Papa Roi.
Why don't we get dressed?
I'll wait for you in the garden.
For your riding lesson.
DOOR CLOSES
Sire.
The Polish crisis has blown up.
Prussia and Russia are poised to invade.
Should we allow Austria to join in the carve up?
D'Aiguillon, you are a newcomer here,
so I'll forgive your faux pas.
We never discuss business at Fontainebleau.
What the fuck is he doing?
I refuse to ask my brother for his permission to marry.
I don't care who you marry. Just get on and do it.
She has got to be put in her place.
Good morning, monsieur.
Before you go, would you mind assisting us
with the little Dauphine's seat?
Shouldn't Madame be riding side saddle?
Madame refuses.
Can't you speak to Papa Roi for me?
I have. He insists that you speak to Louis.
He's hardly a role model.
Learn to fight your corner, Provence.
It's the only way to survive this shit show.
Thank you.
Enjoying the view, brother?
Making plans for when it will all be yours?
You can have it.
I could arrange for you to be flung in a ditch.
Would you prefer to be buried alive?
I am buried alive.
Don't deny me my right to be a man.
Don't be pushed into something you're not ready for.
You married your princess. I was forced to.
You don't have to make the same mistake.
When are you going to unbutton your breeches and screw your wife?
I can't...
I can't speak to her.
When I open my mouth, nothing comes out and I'm a clumsy fool in her presence.
She is an Austrian Archduchess.
She terrifies me.
Do I have your permission to marry?
Yes.
You know, Louis, you put us Bourbons to shame.
You know, I shan't waste a moment delivering the heir, brother.
When...
When did he agree?
This afternoon.
The princess will be travelling to Fontainebleau without a delay.
Tell me about her, Mercy.
The House of Savoy is a trifle compared to the Habsburg Empire.
I want to know about HER.
Who? Josephine.
She is the one who should have married Louis.
YOU married him.
That's what matters.
The Princess of Savoy is no threat to you, provided you deliver the heir.
I have good news on that front.
Doesn't he need a bed?
Yes.
Will you speak to the King?
Why not?
He...makes...
..me feel uncomfortable.
I will arrange all the furnishings.
Your husband must be in situ before the Princess arrives,
and when he moves in, he must open
your door and step daintily into his bed.
DOOR OPENS AND CLOSES
SHE SIGHS
KNOCK ON DOOR
Little Dauphine?
RAGGED BREATHS
I can't sleep in my apartment.
Someone may creep in, and...
Stay with me until then.
I'll look after you.
I like being here with you.
Still no joy with the wife?
I visited the Dauphine.
She was not there.
I shall not visit her again.
FLOOR CREAKS
Leave us alone.
I can't imagine what exquisite decadence you two like to indulge in.
Why don't you let me watch?
You are a monster.
If she did her duty, the arrival of a princess would be irrelevant.
She is far too young, Ma. You should have waited until she was ready.
None of your daughters has found happiness
in the arms of their Bourbon princes.
Marriage is not about a personal indulgence. It's their career.
You were born without a heart.
I don't have time for soul searching.
Russia and Prussia are poised to invade Poland.
We have been left in limbo because the King of France is too busy teaching Toinette to ride.
Then use Mercy to open up a channel of communication.
I will write to him. Now.
Thank you. Thank you, Julie.
Who asked you to make up this bedchamber?
His Majesty.
You went over my head.
Who went over your head?
You did. I don't know why you're wasting your time preparing this apartment for Louis.
Everyone knows that you prefer to sleep with Lamballe.
Ask her why she wants to separate me from my husband.
Go ahead. Take orders from me, little Dauphine.
Listen to her.
HE INTERRUPTS
When Louis discovers you here, he will run for his life.
Are you riding out?
It's time for you to go inside now.
Your apartment is ready.
It can wait.
Is there something wrong with you, boy?
Should I be getting the Martinere to examine you?
Perhaps there is a medical reason?
For the lack of interest in your wife?
But you're supposed to be having fun.
France, where the hell are you?
I've been looking for you everywhere.
Until she publicly acknowledges me in front of your family, you will be spending your nights alone.
Oh.
HE SIGHS
Austria requests that you withdraw your troops in preparation for the partition of Poland.
Another war.
You are our ally, Sire.
Surely we can find a solution that benefits both sides.
Oh, do wake up, Mercy.
Our alliance is collapsing around our ears, our children refusing
to honour their marriage contracts,
and I am caught in the middle between a little Dauphine
and a bloody countess. I'm fighting on both fronts, Sire.
As am I.
The Dauphin will move into his apartment this evening.
Thank you, Sire.
Oh, um, I was in my grandson's bedchamber this morning.
I saw something I had never seen before in all my time at court.
It was a boy dressed in a maid's uniform.
And she, she bowed to me.
Chambermaids are notorious for spying on behalf of ambassadors.
Do you know that?
So I am wondering which ambassador might have planted him there, Mercy?
I will look into it.
How may I help on the other matter?
A public truce...
..at the fete champetre, in exchange for a free rein in Poland?
Yes, Sire.
Why can't I meet her in private?
The King insists on a public reconciliation.
The King?
I won't do it.
I won't do it!
Reflect carefully.
The Princess of Savoy is on her way.
Your position is hanging by a thread.
BANGING
I will leave you to do your duty.
HE SNORES
Stay right where you are.
It's me, my love.
Madame?
You can't lock the King out of your bedchamber.
It's France! Let me in!
He won't be laying his anointed head on my pillow
until his little Dauphine goes down on her hands and knees
and crawls to me.
No, no, no. No need to.
I can't see her stealing the show.
RAGGED BREATHS
Welcome to the family, Josephine.
This is Provence.
Where is Provence?
This is little Dauphine.
It's a pleasure to meet you.
The duc de Chartres.
Madame du Barry.
Princess.
Mesdames...
Welcome, dear Josephine.
We are thrilled to meet you at last.
I've heard so much about you.
BOTH: Oh.
The Princess of Lamballe.
Do you remember me, cousin?
No.
And the Dauphin.
Welcome to Fontainebleau.
Did you have a comfortable journey?
Thank you, Monsieur. I did.
Please. Please. Call me Louis.
Shall we?
Oh, ghastly. Dreadful.
My thoughts exactly.
How could you have suggested her, Mesdames?
Josephine, she's perfect.
Are you blind?
She was exhausted from her journey.
She's got to go.
She has come to deliver the heir.
You have a job to do, Provence.
No!
Nearly there.
Is that really necessary?
It's vital.
You're in France now.
God knows how your family managed to fornicate back in Turin.
SHE SMARTS
What do you think?
I look like I've been stung by a thousand bees.
The King!
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Merry England.
A celebration of all things English.
Why won't Provence speak to me?
Give him time.
He can't wait to marry you.
I should be Louis's wife.
Yes.
Yes.
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
Thank you.
The Dauphine will pay her respects to the Countess this evening.
There'll be no deal on Poland unless she does, Mercy.
I hold you responsible.
You picked her.
You manipulated me for your own agenda.
A marriage was your idea.
I should never have listened to a Parisian tart.
What is it with you, Bourbon princes?
Why don't you want to fuck?
Who would want to fuck her?
I wonder whether a woman is what you're looking for, Provence.
Are you prepared for tonight?
I'm thinking about it.
Your mother is waiting.
Send her back, Papa Roi.
I can't marry her.
You already have.
The contract was signed before she left Turin.
APPLAUSE
MUSIC PLAYS
APPLAUSE
I don't know what it is.
There will be consequences for Austria.
Is Josephine...
the girl you wanted to marry?
Is that what this is all about?
Huh?
Was I destined to fail from the start?
No!
I won't open the door until you speak to me.
HE SOBS
HE CONTINUES SOBBING
To what do I owe this pleasure, Ambassador?
I have news of the little Dauphine, Empress.
Tell me. She is making quite an impression at Fontainebleau.
Is she?
Your daughter is still refusing to speak to Madame du Barry.
The king has understandably taken it as an affront to his dignity.
It won't be long before he slings her out of France and sends her back to you.
It won't be long before I sling you out, Rohan.
The French ambassador has informed me of your conduct at Fontainebleau.
Understand me, Toinette.
I will no longer tolerate your unruly behaviour.
If the king asks you to jump, you jump.
You will make peace with the Countess.
You will perform your duty to France and to Austria.
You are a disgrace to me and a traitor to your country.
HORSE WHINNIES
SHE CRIES OUT
Please. Please, Papa Roi.
I can explain.
I can explain. You're hurting me.
I am the King of France.
I expect you to obey me.
Do you understand?
Get out!
HORN BLOWS
Countess...
DOGS BARK
DOOR OPENS AND CLOSES
Austria has invaded Poland.
The king negotiated directly with Vienna.
Rohan was not informed.
I don't give a shit, d'Agiuillon.
France delivered for me.
That's all I care about.
SHE LAUGHS
KNOCK ON DOOR
DOOR OPENS
Thank you.
Thank you for your patience.
KNOCK ON DOOR
Are you happy now?
You old fool.
You are a naughty but magnificent woman.
I don't feel safe here.
Your family, they frighten me.
I want out.
I want to go home.
Don't leave me.
I will protect you.
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