All language subtitles for House.S01E03.BDRip.x265-ION265

Brandon: I didn't sleep well last night,
and I woke up with a scratchy throat.

I just don't feel so good.

Cough.

I have a bit of an upset stomach, too,
and I think I'm running a fever.

I'm just worried I might be contagious.

Inventory. Tomorrow, I'm... yeah, I'm
sure I'll be feeling better by then.

Thanks, Mr. Innabe.

I cannot believe
you just did that.

I... I really do have a cough.

So you weren't lying.

You'd be curled up in bed
with a bowl of chicken soup

even if you didn't have
a horny girl in your bed?

Yes. Because I really do...

Hey, I really do have a cough.

You also have a little rash.

I'm not sure we
should be kissing.

It's okay.

Because I have almost
no interest in kissing you.

Mindy: Oh, baby.

Brandon.

Brandon.

I know I'm good, but come on.

Brandon. Brandon. Brandon.

Brandon. Brandon.

Woman on pa: Any additional rn
to surgical.

House: Why do you want me to treat him?

Blood pressure's not responding
to iv fluids.

No, no. I didn't ask how you
plan to con me into treating him,

I asked you why you
want me to treat him.

He's sick. I care. I'm pathetic.

There are about a billion sick people
on the planet. Why this one?

Because this one's
in our emergency room.

So it's a proximity issue.

If somebody was sick
in the third-floor staiwvell,

that's who'd we be talking about.

I checked the staiwvell. It's clear.

Okay, then. Emergency-room guy it is.

- Wait. Why was that so easy?
- You know why.

Blood pressure's not responding
to iv fluids?

Yeah.

That's just weird.

Cbc was unremarkable. Abdominal
ct scan didn't show anything,

so, people, differential diagnosis.
What's wrong with her?

- Him.
- Him, her. Does it matter?

Does anyone think
it's a testicular problem?

- So, chase?
- Yersinia infection?

No. You wouldn't get
the rash or cough.

What about arthritis? Accompanying
vasculitis causes nerve damage.

It wouldn't cause the blood pressure
problems. Allergy?

The kid's got abdominal pain.
Maybe carcinoid?

No, but then you
wouldn't get the...

Foreman, if you're going to list
all the things it's not,

it might be quicker
to do it alphabetically.

Let's see, now.
Absidia. Excellent.

Doesn't account for any of the symptoms.

No condition accounts
for all these symptoms.

Good. Because I thought maybe he was
sick, but, apparently, he's not.

Who wants to do up
the discharge papers?

Unless we control the blood pressure,
he's gonna start circling the drain

before we can figure out
what's wrong with him.

Treat him for sepsis,
broad-spectrum antibiotics,

and I want a cort stim test
and an echocardiogram.

- You all right?
- Yeah.

Foreman: The cort stim test
will tell us

if your pituitary and adrenal glands
are working properly.

His glands? What does that mean?

We have a few theories
we're working on.

- You mean you don't know.
- Mindy.

If they knew, they wouldn't be
testing you, they'd be treating you.

That's the way it works.

First we find out what it is,
then we get you better.

- You're half an hour late.
- Busy caseload.

One case is not a load.

So how are we doing
on cotton swabs today?

If there's an acute shortage,
I could run home.

No, you couldn't.

Nice.

Hello, sick people
and their loved ones.

In the interest of saving time and
avoiding a lot of boring chitchat later,

I'm Dr. Gregory house.
You can call me Greg.

I'm one of three doctors
staffing this clinic this morning.

Short. Sweet. Grab a file.

This ray of sunshine
is Dr. Lisa cuddy.

Dr. Cuddy runs this whole hospital,

so, unfortunately, she's much too busy
to deal with you.

I am a board certified diagnostician,

with a double specialty
of infectious disease and nephrology.

I'm also the only doctor
currently employed at this clinic

who is forced to be
here against his will.

That is true, isn't it?

But not to worry,
because for most of you,

this job could be done
by a monkey with a bottle of motrin.

Speaking of which,
if you're particularly annoying,

you may see me reach for this.

This is Vicodin. It's mine.
You can't have any.

And, no, I do not have
a pain-management problem.

I have a pain problem.

But who knows? Maybe I'm wrong.
Maybe I'm too stoned to tell.

So, who wants me?

And who would rather wait
for one of the other two guys?

Okay. Well, I'll be in exam room 1
if you change your mind.

Jodi Matthews.

Please accompany Dr. House
to exam room 1.

Dr. Chase.

I'm not sure scaring your boyfriend is
the best medicine for him right now.

I know. I get stupid
when I'm scared.

Don't go rock climbing.

Look, I was wondering. Before
this happened, we were having sex.

What? You're wondering if whatever
he has, you might have gotten it?

It's unlikely. We ran
a complete std panel, so...

No. I'm wondering
if maybe I did this to him.

I was kind of rough.

It was yellow.

- It was?
- It's not anymore.

Well, that's a shame.

I thought that might be
a problem, so I brought you this.

Your mucus was 'pale goldenrod.'

- last week, yes. Should I be worried?
- Oh, yes. Very.

Really? I thought it was okay now.

And yet, here you are.
What happened?

Paramedics took a week
to respond to your 911 call?

You're not a very nice doctor,
are you?

And you are very bad
at whatever it is you do.

- You don't even know me.
- I know you're gonna get fired.

That's why you got the new glasses.

That's why your
teeth are sparkly white.

You're getting the most of your health
insurance while you still can.

I might be quitting.

You'd have known that last week,

when your snot was
still pale goldenrod.

You're getting fired.

I just don't like
being told what to do.

I can get you in
for a full body scan later this week.

Thanks.

Foreman: It's got to be viral.

We should start
running gels and titers.

Maybe we should look
into the girlfriend's theory.

She thinks she rode him to death.

What did you tell her?

I told her 22-year-old men
don't die of sex.

- What did you ask her?
- What do you mean?

I mean, I hope you got some specifics
on exactly what was going on.

If the girl thinks it could kill you,
it's worth knowing about.

Have you ever taken a life?

We should stop the antibiotics.

It's too soon to say
they're not having an effect.

They're having an effect.

His BP's falling fast.
There's fluid filling his lungs.

His creatinine is rising.

His kidneys are shutting down.

Our treatment
isn't making him better.

It's killing him.

So, we had six symptoms
that didn't add up to anything,

now we got seven. Who's excited?

I don't think it complicates things.

The kidney failure was caused
by the antibiotics.

- Maybe.
- Foreman: Typically, low blood pressure

and abdominal pain
means an infection.

An abdominal infection causes
sepsis, low blood pressure.

Except we checked
for abdominal infections.

I know, but what
if it's the other way around?

What if the low blood pressure's
causing the abdominal pain?

Viral heart infection. The intestines
aren't getting enough blood,

and the result is belly pain.

I know it's
not the standard presentation.

It's a 10-million-to-one shot.

I thought
that's what we dealt with here.

It explains the cardiomyopathy,
the pain, the low BP, the fever.

You read the book. Impressive.

It's a ludicrously long shot that
explains every one of those symptoms

except for the cough and the rash.
Should we just erase those?

Well, anything can cause a rash.

House: Okay. Cardiac infection.

Cameron, you thought allergy.

Chase, what was it you thought?

Carcinoid?
Then there's hypothyroidism.

Could be parasites.

Finally, sinus infection.

If you're gonna list all it can't be,
you're gonna need more colors.

Cameron was right. No condition
explains all these symptoms.

But orange and green
covers everything.

Orange and green?

Two conditions
contracted simultaneously?

Occam's razor. The simplest
explanation is always the best.

- You think one is simpler than two?
- Pretty sure it is, yeah.

Baby shows up. Chase tells you

that two people exchanged fluids
to create this being.

I tell you that one stork dropped
the little tyke off in a diaper.

- Are you gonna go with two or one?
- I think your argument is specious.

I think your tie is ugly.
Why is one simpler than two?

It's lower, lonelier. Is it simpler?

Each one of these conditions
is about a thousand-to-one shot.

That means that any
two of them happening

at the same time is
a million-to-one shot.

Chase says the cardiac infection
is a 10-million-to-one shot,

which makes my idea
10 times better than yours.

- Get a calculator. Run the numbers.
- We'll run the tests.

Tests take time.
Treatment's quicker.

Start the kid on unasyn
for the sinus infection and...

- What was orange?
- Cameron: Hypothyroidism.

- My uncle has hypothyroidism.
- Not like this.

Intravenous ievothyroxine
is an artificial thyroid medication

that should take care of it.

Also, the nurses are going
to start you on unasyn.

It's a more targeted antibiotic.

- For the sinus infection?
- Yes.

And the other stuff is
for something else entirely?

Bad luck, huh? Don't worry.

He should be back
to ditching work in no time.

Brandon?

Brandon: Hey, ma.

We're his parents.
How's he doing?

- Brandon is...
- Mom, dad...

This is mindy.

I was gonna bring her home
for Christmas.

We're engaged.

Woman on pa: Dr. Hall
to the recovery room.

Did you tell the family
house's theory?

Two odd conditions striking completely
coincidentally at the exact same time.

- I didn't phrase it quite that way.
- They agree to treatment?

Of course they did. We're doctors.
They believe whatever we tell them.

So, is that ourjob?
House's puppets?

He comes up with an insane idea,
we get to pretend it's not?

His insane ideas are usually right.
We've been here long enough to...

We've been here long enough
to have Stockholm syndrome.

What, because we don't hate him?

He thinks outside the box.
Is that so evil?

He has no idea where the box is.

If you guys think he's right,
go home, relax.

Just wait for the kid to get all better.

I'm going to the lab
to test for viral infections.

- Negative for coxsackie b virus.
- Seven down, about 5,000 to go.

You think we're gonna
come up with your mystery virus

just by running gels
till we guess it right?

No. I think we're gonna do it
by standing around

watching other people work.

I'm waiting
for the Epstein-barr virus.

- She's weird, isn't she?
- Bad idea.

- What?
- Bad idea. You work with her.

What did I say? Is weird some new,
ghetto euphemism for sexy,

like bad is good
and phat is good?

- Then what the hell does good mean?
- Ghetto euphemism?

- You don't think she's hot?
- No.

Then you're brilliant. And I am
using brilliant as a euphemism.

Obviously, the girl is hot. You're not
talking about her aesthetics.

You're talking about
if I want to jump her. I don't.

Brilliant.

Your Epstein-barr is ready.

- Man: What are you doing?
- Level four.

- No, no. I mean...
- I know what you meant.

- We're waiting.
- My throat hurts.

- So you said.
- How long are we waiting?

Two minutes less than when
you asked me two minutes ago.

Hi. I'm Dr. Cuddy.
Nice to meet you.

Dr. Cuddy,
thanks for the consult.

His throat seems
to have some condition.

Cuddy: Say ah.

He has a sore throat.

Of course. Yes, why didn't I...

I mean, because
he said that it hurt.

I should have deduced
that meant it was sore.

- I was in a board meeting.
- Patients come first, right?

Wouldn't want to prescribe a lozenge if
there's any doubt about its efficacy?

You once asked me why
I think I'm always right,

and I realized that you're right.
At least, I think you're right.

I don't really know, now do I?

- Hey. I'm here.
- Go home. Drink some hot tea.

Excellent counsel.

Cameron: Negative on parvovirus b19.

- I'm impressed.
- Thank you. I was born to run gels.

- I meant about chase.
- What about chase?

Well, the man has
no physical interest in you.

He has a completely
professional relationship with you,

respects you as a colleague
and a doctor,

and yet, he can't look
at you without thinking sex.

Because I asked
what kind of sex could kill you?

You now have total control
over your relationship with him.

So, a woman can't express
her interest in sex

without it being some
professional power play?

If you look the way you do
and you say what you said,

you have to be aware of the effect
that it's going to have on men.

Men should grow up.

And dogs should stop licking themselves.

- It's not gonna happen.
- What's going on?

- What are you doing here?
- Looking for you guys.

- Why didn't you page us?
- 'Cause I knew you'd be here.

- Who told him?
- No one.

I assume you're trying to prove
my crazy, two-illness theory wrong,

so, obviously, you're gonna be
in the lab. You spin the urine?

- Not yet.
- Talk to me when you have.

- What'd you find out?
- Kidney failure.

- It's acute interstitial nephritis.
- I wonder if that's significant.

It means the antibiotics didn't
cause the kidney failure.

- How'd you know?
- If you guys hadn't been so busy

trying to prove me wrong, you might
have checked in on the poor kid.

You visited a patient?

I was sitting by his bed all morning,
so he'd know someone was there for him.

- I looked in on him. He's much better.
- Ergo, the treatment's working.

- Ergo, me right, you wrong.
- Hey, I'm glad for the kid.

Wilson: That smugness of yours
really is an attractive quality.

Thank you. It was either that
or get my hair highlighted.

- Smugness is easier to maintain.
- I get that you're not a big believer

in the catching-flies-with-honey
approach,

but do you honestly think you'll collect
a jarful by cleverly taunting them?

Flies, no. Doctors, sure.
If I'd said to foreman:

"Nice try. It was a great guess,
but sorry, not this time,"

what would he be doing now?

I think he'd be going home
not feeling like a piece of crap.

Exactly.

You want him to feel
like a piece of crap?

I don't want him going home.

Dr. Foreman.

- Foreman: You still have the cough.
- I'm feeling a lot better though.

His fever is gone.
His rash is going away.

Foreman: I see.

Is everything okay?

Just ordering some tests.
Absolutely nothing to worry about.

How much longer?

9:30. I figure she was
on the eighth hole when I paged her.

You probably got another half hour.

I ran a tsh, t3 and t4. The patient's
negative for hypothyroidism.

I'm not talking about you.

Well, the fact that he's getting better

would indicate the unreliability
of the tests.

If I'm right and it's a viral infection,
one of two things always happen,

the patient dies or the patient's
immune system fights off the invader.

What's with her?

Her leg hurts after running six miles.

- Who knows? Could be anything.
- He's getting better.

That doesn't prove you're right.
Thatjust proves he's getting better.

It's not two illnesses.
It can't be two illnesses.

I am so glad you work here.

If I'm right,
the antibiotics you prescribed

could box his kidneys and liver,

impeding his ability to fight off
the virus. It could kill him.

Well, that certainly
would be a concern.

Fifty bucks?

Don't look away. The space monkeys
will be all over you.

- You wanna bet on the patient's health?
- You think that's bad luck?

You think that god will smite him
because of our insensitivity?

Well, if god does,
you make a quick 50.

Go check his white-blood count.

If he's fighting off a virus
like you think, it'll be way up.

Cuddy said you needed a consult.
What's up? I'm busy.

- I was just being glib.
- You haven't said anything.

Before, when I was talking
about Brandon's girlfriend

thinking sex could kill you.

I was just making a joke
because I was uncomfortable.

- I don't even remember what you said.
- I'm uncomfortable about sex.

- We don't have to talk about this.
- Sex could kill you.

Do you know what the human body
goes through when you have sex?

Pupils dilate, arteries constrict,

core temperature rises, heart races,
blood pressure skyrockets.

Respiration
becomes rapid and shallow.

The brain fires bursts of electrical
impulses from nowhere to nowhere,

and secretions spit
out of every gland,

and the muscles tense and spasm

like you're lifting three times
your body weight.

It's violent, it's ugly, and it's messy.

And if god hadn't made it
unbelievably fun,

the human race would've
died out eons ago.

Men are lucky they can only
have one orgasm.

You know that women
can have an hour-long orgasm?

Hey, foreman. What's up?

- Hey, foreman.
- Hey.

White-cell count isn't up, is it?

No. We were both wrong.

White-cell count is down,
way down and dropping.

His immune system is shot. We need
to get him into a clean room.

Chase: Can you walk, Brandon?

Yeah. A little.

Okay. 'Cause we'll need
to leave the chair outside.

- Thank you.
- Where's April? April?

- Can you take that chairr? Thank you.
- April: Yes, Robert.

I'll need to take your mask
and your robe, too.

You might wanna block
your ears for this, it's quite loud.

Something's made him
immunocompromised.

His white-blood-cell count is down,

which means his body
can't fight off infections.

- If he gets sick, he'll die.
- Sick? How sick?

Foreman: If he gets a cold, he'll die.

Foreman: Okay. I'm gonna push
the needle into your hip bone

and take some of the marrow.

- That's not so bad.
- Uh-uh.

That was just the anesthetic.

The core biopsy needle,
it's a bit bigger.

Hey, man. Take a deep breath.
This is gonna hurt, a lot.

Your marrow makes
the blood cells.

We take a peek at it
under a microscope,

and maybe we find
a viral infection.

Maybe we find some fibrosis.

Something to explain
why your blood count is so low.

There we go.

One step closer to an answer.

If you don't find one,

I can't stay here forever.

- House: The patient could've died.
- The one with the pulled muscle?

Those symptoms are consistent
with a dozen other conditions.

You know, I'm entitled to a consult.

You are not getting
out of clinic duty.

Come on. You got a hundred other
idiot doctors in this building

who go all warm and fuzzy every
time they pull a toy car out of a nose.

- You don't need me here.
- No, I don't,

but working with people actually
makes you a better doctor.

When did isign up
for that course?

When did I give you
the impression that I care?

Working in this clinic obviously
instills a deep sense of compassion.

I've got your home number, right?

In case anything comes up
at 3:00 in the morning.

It's not gonna work.
You know why?

Because this is fun.

You think of something
to make me miserable.

I think of something
to make you miserable.

It's a game, and I'm gonna win
because I got a head start.

You are already miserable.

- Is this important?
- No.

Good.

- What's with you and her?
- Don't.

You have a thing for her?
The only people who can...

No. There is not a thin line
between love and hate.

There is, in fact,
a great wall of China,

with armed sentries posted
every 20 feet between love and hate.

- Thirty-six Vicodin.
- Pharmacist: Who's the patient?

- I am.
- You can't...

Dr. Wilson
is the prescribing physician.

You will lie, cheat
and steal to get what you want,

but you're incapable
of kissing a little ass?

- Come on. We all have our limitations.
- House, wrong bottle.

Do me a favor.

Take one of these,
wait five minutes for it to kick in,

then find cuddy
and kiss her ass.

What was the kid's first symptom?

You did the history. Of his
800 symptoms, which one hit him first?

The cough.

Gout.

Are we talking about Brandon?

Gout? Uric acid crystals in the joints?

The symptoms are pain,
swelling, redness, stiffness.

Not one of which do
I see on that board.

Because he doesn't have gout.

Every day, cells die.

We survive because the remaining cells
divide and replace the losses.

The colchicine, a gout medicine,

blocks mitosis and
stops cell division,

which will result
in abdominal pain, rash,

nausea, fever, kidney failure,
low blood pressure

and will also mess
with the bone marrow.

He doesn't have gout.
Why would he have gout medication?

Because you guys were right.

He didn't have two conditions
at the exact same time.

First, he got a cough. And because
he's an idiot, he went to a doctor.

In order to justify charging $200,

that doctor felt he should
actually do something. Oops!

He wrote a prescription.

Seven thousand people die
each year from pharmacy screw-ups.

Not nearly as many as die
from doctor screw-ups,

but still, not something they use
in their promotional materials.

The pharmacist gave him gout medicine
instead of cough medicine,

and the only thing it wouldn't do,

it would do absolutely nothing
to relieve his cough.

Occam's razor.

The simplest explanation is almost
always that somebody screwed up.

But once he checked into this hospital,
he was completely in our control.

Our food, our pills, our everything,

so even if you're right,
no more gout medication.

He'd either continue to deteriorate,
or he would've gotten better.

But he got better,
and then he got worse.

It doesn't fit. It doesn't make sense.

Okay. Two people screwed up.

Not as simple as one, but...

He's resting. He's...

I'm Dr. House.
I'm your son's physician.

- You're the one we haven't met yet.
- You're the one he hasn't met.

How can you treat someone
without meeting them?

It's easy if you don't
give a crap about him.

That's a good thing.

If emotions made you act rationally,
they wouldn't be called emotions, right?

That's why we have
this division of labor.

You hold his hand,
I get him better.

If I start tucking him in at night,
that's not fair to you guys.

If you start prescribing medicine,
that's not fair to me.

What I wanna know is,
who stepped on my side of the net?

Who cared enough to get stupid enough
to give him his cough medicine?

- When we checked in, Dr. Foreman...
- Tuesday, he's getting better.

Wednesday, he's getting sick again.

Somebody gave him
his cough medicine Wednesday.

Come on. Nobody's gonna be mad.

I just wanna know
who tried to kill the kid.

- Dr. House, maybe we should...
- His throat was sore.

Page Dr. Occam.
He's gonna wanna hear about this.

I'm sorry. He was coughing,
and I just wanted to help him.

Aren't you a dear.
Where are the pills?

He took the last of them before
he was switched into that room.

- They're all gone?
- It was just cough medicine.

No, it wasn't.
Where's the bottle?

We need to know exactly
what you put in this bottle.

We think it was colchicine,
a gout medication.

If the prescription said cough medicine,
that's what I dispensed.

The family is prepared
to waive liability, all right?

We just need to know
what it was, what dosage it was.

It was cough medicine.

Refill it.

- He's gonna be okay.
- You don't know that.

Does Brandon like
that quality in you?

You're a little negative.

Things don't always
work out for the best.

Doesn't hurt to hope they do.

No. Not unless that makes you
figure you can do whatever you want,

like give people cough medicine.

This is cough medication.

This is what Brandon
was supposed to get.

They're small, round and yellow.

Can you tell this man what the pills
in your son's medicine bottle

actually looked like?

They were small, round
and yellow, exactly like this.

Those were the pills
that Brandon was taking.

Hey, I'm just a pharmacist,

but I know what cough medicine
looks like, doctor.

House: It was so perfect.
It was beautiful.

Beauty often seduces us
on the road to truth.

And triteness kicks
us in the nads.

- So true.
- This doesn't bother you?

That you were wrong?
I try to work through the pain.

I was not wrong.
Everything I said was true.

- It fit. It was elegant.
- So, reality was wrong?

Reality's almost always wrong.

The cough medicine did something.

Aggravated the condition.

It's all over the place.
Must be in his blood.

What if it is his blood?

- Lymphoma?
- Unless you've got something better.

We foolishly ruled out lymphoma

because his ct scan
showed no adenopathy.

Cbc showed a normal differen-smear,
bone marrow showed no...

Screw the tests.

Do an exploratory laparotomy
and find out what's in there.

He has no blood pressure,
no immune system and no kidneys.

- Surgery will kill him.
- Yeah, you're right.

Let's stick with the wrong-pill theory.

I'll schedule him for surgery.

Foreman: Okay, Brandon, we're
running this tube through your heart

and into the pulmonary arteries
in your lung.

Cameron: The sensors
will give us information

for the exploratory surgery
later this afternoon.

- My fingers are numb.
- Foreman: Try not to move.

We're in the right atrium,

trying to catch the flow
through the tricuspid valve.

Chase: I think the
catheter's curling in the atrium.

Got it. We're in the rv now.

Ectopy. You must've
irritated the heart wall.

- It'll calm down.
- He can't tolerate cardiac arrhythmia.

- Pull back.
- He needs the surgery.

Pressure's dropped.

- You still with us, Brandon?
- Get the curtains.

Vf.

Chase: Charging. Clear.

Sinus rhythm.

I got a pulse.

Yeah, but no surgery today.

How're you doing?

Okay.

Great. I'm doing good, too.

I get to knock off
an hour early today. You know why?

Because I kissed my boss' ass.
Do you ever do that?

I think she just said yes 'cause
she wants to reinforce that behavior.

Wants me to kiss a lot of other people's
ass, like she wants me to kiss yours.

What would you want, a doctor
who holds your hand while you die

or a doctor who ignores you
while you get better?

I guess it would particularly suck
to have a doctor

who ignores you while you die.

I should go.

You think it's gonna
come out on its own?

Are we talking bigger
than a breadbasket?

Actually, it will come out on its own.
Which, for small stuff, is no problem.

It's wrapped up in a nice,
soft package, and plop.

Big stuff,
you're gonna rip something,

which, speaking medically,
is when the fun stops.

How did you...

After half an hour you haven't sat down.
That tells me its location.

You haven't told me what it is.
That tells me it's humiliating.

You have a little birdie
carved on your arm.

That tells me you have
a high tolerance for humiliation,

so I figure it's not hemorrhoids.

I've been a doctor 20 years.
You're not gonna surprise me.

It's an mp3 player.

Is it...

Is it because
of the size or the shape,

or is it the pounding bass line?

What are we gonna do?

- I'm gonna wait.
- For what?

It's 3:00. I'm off. Would you tell
Dr. Cuddy there's a patient

in exam room 2 needs her attention?

And the riaa wants her
to check for illegal downloads.

- Brandon's not ready for surgery.
- Let's leave it a couple of weeks.

He should be feeling better by then.
Wait. Which way does time go?

He crashed during prep. He's also
experiencing pain in his fingers.

Think some bug may have gotten
in the clean room.

I think we should
double his dosage of g-csf

to temporarily boost
his white-blood-cell count.

Pain in his fingers. Right.

Hi again.

- You can't go in...
- Where's he going?

Hey. How you all doing?

Interesting fact. Every seven years,
it's a whole new you.

- Inspiring metaphor, huh?
- Dr. House, this is a clean room.

Yeah. I read the sign.

But cells of different organs
reproduce at different rates.

So, you get a new kidney
every three years.

Get a new stomach lining
every week.

This is why colchicine poisoning causes
all these symptoms, but not all at once.

But we went to the pharmacy.
We saw the pills.

Colchicine does its damage
in a very specific order.

First of all, there's the pain
in the abdomen, the rash, the fever.

Isn't that what you got first?
Then the kidneys go,

which is exactly what happened to...

- Brandon.
- Right.

Then it screws up
your bone marrow and then neuropathy.

A painful tingling
in the fingers and toes.

And what do you suppose
happens after that?

Hair loss. The bad news is
your special boy is doing drugs.

- No, he's not.
- Ecstasy?

Twice with Dan and Mike.

House: You know what they cut that stuff
with? Apparently, colchicine.

Unless you ingested the colchicine
through your contact lens solution

or skin cream or some other drug
you're lying about.

I don't know how it happened. I don't
care how it happened. It happened.

Start...

- Brandon.
- Lovely name.

Start Brandon on fab fragments,

and get him some Tylenol
for the hair I pulled out.

And get some air in here.

Make a note.
I should never doubt myself.

I think you'll remember.

It wouldn't hurt you
to be wrong every now and then.

What, you don't care
about these people?

The colchicine interferes with the
ability of the heart muscle to contract,

pumping blood,
lowering your blood pressure.

The antibodies we're giving you
should neutralize the colchicine,

allowing your heart
to beat at its normal rate.

When will you know?

We know now.

Oh, thank god.

Big weekend?

- It's not for me. I'm fully stocked.
- Cuddy got you doing inventory?

- Trying to solve that kid's case.
- The gout medicine od?

Yeah.

The fact that I know
it's a gout medicine od

would seem to indicate the case
is already solved.

Well, you'd be wrong.

What about the fact
that the kid is now,

I believe the technical
term is not sick?

You know how many forms of colchicine
there are on the market?

Neither do I, but it's a lot.
Pills, powders, liquids, iv fluids.

Somewhere at a party, in his coffee,

up his nose, in his ear,
this kid had some.

So, you're not happy
with your ecstasy theory?

- He said he used it twice.
- People lie.

- If you're gonna lie, it's...
- I'm not interested.

- Not curious?
- No. Because I'm well adjusted.

Right.

- Cameron: Temperature's normal.
- I want cousin Sharon there.

If we invite Sharon, we have to invite
all the cousins.

So what? My side of the family
doesn't need anything.

I don't suppose I could have
some of those cough pills?

- They're okay, right?
- Yes. You're doing great.

You should invite Dr. House.

- Brandon: Will he come?
- No, but he'll send a gift.

I'll make sure it's a good one.

There's a letter
on the back of these pills.

Your old pills
didn't have a letter on them?

No. Round and yellow,
but no letter.

Well, these will help your cough.

- Hey, you wanna go get some...
- No.