Original subtitles

♪♪

Then... he stabbed her from behind her...

And I...

Hid behind the couch.

It's okay, Zander.

This is too much.

He...

My father...

Killed my mom.

Okay, man, let's get this off.

I'm so proud of you.

How did you get so brave, huh?

The superheroes helped me.

See you downstairs, okay?

The douchebag's here again.

Well, I mean, we can always egg him.

Like we can't see him and don't know he's a photographer.

♪♪

[laughing]

So I'm going to throw this out there

because we both know that even though

we're sitting here together,

Colton's figuratively between us.

It's been days, why don't you call him?

I called Becks to check on him,

and he said that he's still pretty fucked up,

that I need to give him the space he asked for

and that he'll call when he has his shit together.

Hmm.

Wonder where I heard that phrase before.

I believe a very wise woman once told me.

And being as I am that woman,

may I offer you another tidbit of advice?

A Haddie-ism?

Yes, a Haddie-ism.

That is if you still feel he's worth it.

I love him, Had.

If the baby is his?

It's not if the baby's his,

it's his reaction to it that scares me.

What if he is the father and he can't handle it?

How could I sleep in the bed of a man

who would write off his own child

and then go work in a house full of boys

who've had the very same thing happen to them?

What kind of a hypocrite would that make me?

Here you go, ladies.

- Thank you. - No problem.

He was blindsided by Tawny.

And look how he is with the boys.

I say never look down on a man

unless he's between your legs.

[laughs]

- One for love. - And one for courage.

Ooh!

Rylee, did Tawny know about your affair with Colton?

Come on.

[reporters clamoring]

Rylee, what do you say about the accusations?

You just going to stand there

or come in and pass judgment on me face to face?

No. No judgment.

You want me to tell you that I fucked Tawny

and now I'm getting what I deserve?

That I don't want a kid?

Will not have a kid with her or anyone else ever?

So how the hell could someone like me be a father

when I'm just as fucked up now as when you found me?

Well, what does Rylee think about all this?

She was here when Tawny dropped the bomb.

We got into a fight because I was being inconsiderate ass.

Bitching about a baby I don't want when she can't have one.

I was in stellar form, Dad.

We agreed to a few days apart.

Son, when are you going to finally pull your head

out of your ass and give her a call?

She doesn't deserve this.

The shit that comes with me.

My past, not my possible fucking future.

You don't think that's up to her to decide?

You didn't see her fighting for you

every day you were lying in that hospital bed.

Never leaving.

Which leads me to believe that this little dilemma

of yours isn't about her at all, it's about you.

Would you look at me, Dad, look what she did to me.

I am looking at you.

I look at you every day and I see this incredible person.

It's not fucking possible.

You're my dad. You have to say that.

You're wrong.

I didn't have to stop and sit next to you on the doorstep,

I didn't have to take you to the hospital,

I didn't have to adopt you or love you.

Don't you walk away from me.

How can you tell me I'm this incredible person

when for 24 years

you told me a million times how much you love me,

and not once did I say it back to you.

Not once.

How can I not think I'm fucked up

when you've given me everything

and I've given you absolutely nothing?

No son, you've given me everything.

You gave me hope, gave me pride.

And the unexpected.

Not a single day since I met you

have I ever regretted my choice.

Not when you rebelled.

Not when you fought me on every single damn thing.

Or when you stole the change off the counter.

What, you think I didn't know about the jar of change

and box of food hidden under your bed?

And little stash just in case one day we decided

we didn't want you anymore and just threw you out?

Didn't you notice all that loose change

that suddenly started appearing everywhere?

That was me.

Because I didn't regret a single moment.

I know, Colton,

I know that your birth mother let them do things to you

that were vile and repulsive.

Things that no human being should ever have to endure.

But that doesn't make it your fault.

It doesn't mean you deserved it.

No.

Look...

I know. Okay, fine.

So you never use the actual words,

didn't say the actual words out loud,

you never actually told me that you love me,

but I've always known.

Because you have.

It's in your eyes.

It's in the way your smile would light up

every time you saw me.

It's how you would share your precious Snickers bars with me

without my having to ask.

How you'd let me hold your hand.

And help you chant your superheroes

as you lay in bed so you could fall asleep.

So, words?

No, Colton.

But you told me.

Every single day.

I love you, son.

♪♪

[panting]

Get me that fucking car, Becks.

[phone vibrates]

Becks?

Hey, Ry. I just want you to know that Colton's

on his way to the track right now.

I'm on my way.

[chattering]

[heavy breathing]

[engine revs]

That's it, take it nice and easy.

[panting]

Do this for mommy, okay?

Goddamn it, Becks, this car is shit.

I thought you checked everything.

Nothing wrong with the car, Colton.

Don't know what the fuck you're talking about Beckett.

Goddamnit!

[panting]

Get everyone off the radios.

Everyone, switch off your radio.

Colton.

Ry?

Talk to me.

Tell me what's going through your head.

No one else is on the radios. It's just you and me.

Ry, I... I can't.

There's no traffic.

There's no rookie drivers that are going to make mistakes

or smoke you can't see through.

It's just you and me.

Nothing but sheets.

You can do this.

We can do this.

Together.

I'm right here.

I'm not going anywhere.

Clear your head.

It's just you on the track, Ace.

You can do this.

You need this.

It's your freedom, remember?

Ry, um...

I know, Colton.

Me, too.

♪♪

Lovely.

[laughing]

Let's go, baby.

[applause]

God I fucking missed you.

Let's get this back to the shop.

Get a room!

Whoo!

Who's the man, huh?

We need to talk.

I'm putting the Palisades House up for sale.

I don't need it anymore.

Oh.

What's on your mind, Colton?

Just thinking.

I didn't realize how much I needed to hear your voice

on the track until you came through the headset.

Well...

I promised you I'd be here for your first day back.

I'm sorry.

I was an ass.

You hurt me.

And I know that you were upset and you were lashing out,

but you hurt me when I was already torn apart.

I don't know.

Trying to figure this out as I go,

and, fuck, I know the excuses are getting old,

but I'm trying.

You're my checkered flag.

I need to get used to needing you.

Fuck if that doesn't knock me back a few pit stops.

This scares the ever living shit out of me.

I'm not going to run.

I know you have a lot going on, but you are a lot to take in.

I'm going to need a pit stop sometimes, too.

Between you and the limelight

and the women still wanting you

and hating me and the possibility...

Hello, elephant in the room.

What's going on with that?

I don't care what she says, I know it's not mine.

You're the only woman I've ever not worn a condom with.

I hate the goddamn media following you around.

I hate fucking Tawny and her bullshit lies

and everything she represents.

Hate that once again, I'm hurting you.

I'm going to fuck this up because my past is what it is.

You've got a lot on your plate.

You don't need to worry about me.

Life gets turned upside down by me, and you're more worried

about me and the boys than you are yourself.

You are most definitely the saint I do not deserve.

Well...

Every sinner needs a saint to balance them out.

God, I fucking race you.

I race you.

- Hey, Ry. - Hey.

Okay, so Zander is still asleep.

Oh, and it looks like Shane tied one on last night.

Wha...

He's passed out in his bed, his room reeks of beer,

Ooh, and by the looks of the bathroom,

he was reliving the night backwards into the toilet.

Oh.

Well, we knew this would happen someday.

Shit.

I can stay with Zander and Shane if you want to take baseball.

No, that's cool, I can handle Shane.

Thank you.

We'll meet you guys at the field later for the game.

I love you. Thank you.

Boys!

Okay.

[phone vibrates]

- Hey. - Hey.

This bed's awfully lonely without you in it.

I think you should get here quickly because times wasting

I have a long list of things to do today.

Mmm.

What do you have to do today?

You on the couch,

you on the counter, you against the wall.

You just about any place imaginable.

You have no idea how good that sounds

because my day has already gone to shit.

Why? What happened?

Well, Shane had his first experience with alcohol,

and according to Dane, it was not a good one.

Well, Dane needs to deal with him

because he's not going to listen to you.

I beg to differ.

Plus, Dane just took them to baseball,

and Shane was supposed to go but he is still in bed.

I'm not saying you can't handle it.

Just he's going to listen better if it comes from a man.

I'll be there in 30.

Men.

Hey, Zander.

You okay, buddy?

I want my mommy.

I know, buddy.

[doorbell rings, knocking]

Colton's here.

I'm gonna go get the door, okay?

- Hiya, Ace. - Hey.

Where's our drunk skunk at?

He's upstairs in his room, but I cannot give him beer.

Exactly. That's why I am.

Uh...

[loud music plays]

[groaning]

Stop it.

Didn't think so.

[music stops]

Heard you tied one on hard last night.

Is your head pounding?

The room spinning?

Your stomach feel like you want to throw up,

but there's nothing there?

- Shut up. - No.

How'd you got home last night, Shane?

Davie brought me home.

David drink last night, too?

He had a few.

You want to be stupid and get drunk,

that's one thing.

You want to step in a car?

Let someone drive you who's drunk,

because let's face it, you were shitfaced.

You don't know how many Davie had.

That's something I won't tolerate.

There are way too many people

that love you in this house, Shane.

Rylee, the boys, me.

We don't want anything to happen to you.

Here's my question:

Are you going to get in a car with another person

who's been drinking?

No.

Good answer. I love a smart kid.

So listen up.

I don't care how the fuck you get home,

call me if you have to.

Don't do it again.

Last question. Why?

- Why? - To be cool?

To impress a girl?

Cover the pain for your mom?

You don't have to tell me, but the answer is important.

You need to answer it for yourself.

When I was a little I had some bad shit happened to me.

Really bad shit.

No matter what I did, how good I was, how hard I tried...

Nothing mattered.

So I thought it was my fault.

Hardest part was living with that pain and guilt.

And I started drinking when I was

a hell of a lot younger than you.

And I drank because it hurt so fucking much.

After some stupid stunts

I was lucky enough to walk away from,

my dad sat me down and he asked me.

Why?

Why drink to cover it up?

Because hurting is feeling and feeling is living.

Isn't it good to be alive?

First, I thought it was bullshit.

I would drink to deal with it.

But he would repeat those words to me.

You know why?

He was right.

It takes time.

And it never, ever goes away.

But I'm so glad I chose to feel over being numb.

I'm so glad I chose living over being dead.

[crying]

Just remember.

Hurting is feeling and feeling is living.

Isn't it good to be alive?

Hey, Shane, you stink, dude.

Take a shower, get dressed, I'll take you to the baseball game.

Thank you.

♪♪

See you.

What's up, Dane?

[text chimes]

- Tawny. - Hi.

Surprised to hear from you.

Just answer me one thing. Why?

You fucking lied to those perfect white teeth.

You used my accident.

Colton, I didn't try to...

You didn't use my accident? My fucked up head

as a means to get what you wanted?

Tell me I slept with you when I didn't,

trap me into being a daddy for your illegitimate kid?

How fucked up is that?

What kind of piece of shit does that, Tawn?

Answer me one thing.

Tell me how a woman I used to know was my friend

could stoop so low that you use a kid to try and get me back?

You got the results.

I suggest you listen closely because I'm only going to say

this once: I'm done with you.

Don't contact me.

You sure as fuck better not contact Ry.

Please, don't be so cold.

Cold?

Get ready for the polar fucking ice cap because we're done.

You're dead to me, Tawny.

♪♪

- Hey. - [chuckles]

You okay?

Yeah, I just...

Go get your glove from the backyard, buddy.

[screaming]

No, no, no.

What the fuck is wrong?

RYLEE: You can't have him.

Ry, baby, tell me, please.

MAN: You fucking bitch.

No!

- 911, what's your emergency? - Please help me!

- There's screaming! - What screaming, sir?

- Rylee and Zander. - Sir, what's the address?

Switzerland Avenue number 76.

There's only a woman and a boy in the house.

Please. Quickly.

Batman, Superman, Iron Man, Spiderman, Batman.

What did you do to him?

Why is he acting like that?

He's scared

You're a pretty little thing, aren't you?

How far would you go to protect one of your boys?

Fuck you.

[grunts]

Zander.

I come to take my son.

No.

Who the fuck do you think you're dealing with?

Step away from my son.

When I say Batman,

I need you to run to the kitchen as fast as you can, okay?

Batman.

They're a tough cookie.

I like my women tough.

I am not letting you take him.

I don't think you're in a position to be telling me

exactly what I can and cannot do, right?

Shut him the fuck up.

And someone shut those damn geese up!

Batman!

[gunshot]

♪♪

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