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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:38,640 --> 00:00:40,960 SEAGULLS CALL 2 00:00:43,000 --> 00:00:45,960 Is he really here? He is, yeah. 3 00:00:45,960 --> 00:00:48,960 Do you think he got my letter at the North Pole? 4 00:00:48,960 --> 00:00:50,640 Of course he did. 5 00:00:50,640 --> 00:00:52,960 Daddy, did you write him a letter? 6 00:00:52,960 --> 00:00:55,000 Er, no. I didn't, James, no. Oh. 7 00:00:56,960 --> 00:00:57,960 Oh, look at that. 8 00:00:57,960 --> 00:01:01,960 Haven't they done a wonderful job with the tree this year? Hm. 9 00:01:01,960 --> 00:01:04,960 CAROLLERS: Good King Wenceslas Looked out on the Feast of Stephen 10 00:01:04,960 --> 00:01:08,960 When the snow lay round about Deep and crisp and even... 11 00:01:08,960 --> 00:01:09,960 TURKEY GOBBLES 12 00:01:10,960 --> 00:01:13,000 Hey, fancy guessing the weight of the turkey, Doc? 13 00:01:13,000 --> 00:01:15,960 One pound, two guesses. No. 14 00:01:15,960 --> 00:01:18,960 He's very friendly. Turns out turkeys got a lot of personality. 15 00:01:18,960 --> 00:01:22,960 Hm. Make sure you wash your hands. They're filthy. 16 00:01:22,960 --> 00:01:24,320 TURKEY GOBBLES 17 00:01:24,320 --> 00:01:26,960 CAROLLERS CONTINUE 18 00:01:27,960 --> 00:01:30,960 Has there always been Christmas? 19 00:01:30,960 --> 00:01:32,160 Yeah. Er, no. 20 00:01:32,160 --> 00:01:33,960 Well, not ALWAYS always. 21 00:01:33,960 --> 00:01:35,960 No, it used to be called the Winter Solstice, 22 00:01:35,960 --> 00:01:36,960 but in the fourth century, 23 00:01:36,960 --> 00:01:39,960 Pope Julius chose the 25th of December for Christmas 24 00:01:39,960 --> 00:01:42,800 because he wanted to replace the pagan Saturnalia festival. 25 00:01:42,800 --> 00:01:44,960 James! 26 00:01:44,960 --> 00:01:47,000 Jenny. Hi! 27 00:01:47,000 --> 00:01:49,960 Mm, delicious! Careful, Doc! 28 00:01:49,960 --> 00:01:52,960 Another inch, you're under the mistletoe. 29 00:01:52,960 --> 00:01:55,960 Anyone who wanted could lay a smacker on you. 30 00:01:55,960 --> 00:01:57,800 SHE GULPS What? 31 00:01:57,800 --> 00:01:59,960 Mrs Tishell... 32 00:01:59,960 --> 00:02:03,960 No, I'm fine, Doc. I'm just fine. 33 00:02:04,960 --> 00:02:06,960 It's so nice to see you here, Doc. 34 00:02:06,960 --> 00:02:08,480 How long has this food been outside? 35 00:02:08,480 --> 00:02:09,960 Only since this morning. 36 00:02:09,960 --> 00:02:12,960 You should wear a hair net. It's unhygienic. 37 00:02:12,960 --> 00:02:16,000 CAROLLERS: Nine ladies dancing Eight maids a-milking 38 00:02:16,000 --> 00:02:18,960 Seven swans a-swimming Six geese a-laying 39 00:02:18,960 --> 00:02:23,320 Five gold rings... 40 00:02:23,320 --> 00:02:25,960 I think that's my favourite song. 41 00:02:25,960 --> 00:02:27,960 Yeah, as Christmas ones go, it's all right. 42 00:02:27,960 --> 00:02:30,960 No, not my favourite Christmas song. My favourite song ever. 43 00:02:30,960 --> 00:02:34,960 This guy buys this girl all these amazing gifts. 44 00:02:34,960 --> 00:02:37,960 Five gold rings, four calling birds, 45 00:02:37,960 --> 00:02:41,960 three French men... It's so romantic. 46 00:02:41,960 --> 00:02:44,800 I got you some eggnog. 47 00:02:44,800 --> 00:02:46,960 Oh, yeah, thanks. 48 00:02:46,960 --> 00:02:48,480 Happy Christmas! 49 00:02:48,480 --> 00:02:50,800 Oh, hello, James! Ha-ha. 50 00:02:50,800 --> 00:02:52,960 Are you here to see Santa? 51 00:02:52,960 --> 00:02:54,960 That'll be �10, please, Doc. 52 00:02:54,960 --> 00:02:56,800 �10? Yeah. 53 00:02:56,800 --> 00:02:57,960 Oh... It's fine. Thanks. 54 00:02:57,960 --> 00:02:59,960 Thank you. 55 00:02:59,960 --> 00:03:01,960 �10, really (!) 56 00:03:01,960 --> 00:03:03,960 Merry Christmas, Doc. 57 00:03:03,960 --> 00:03:06,960 And what do you want for Christmas? 58 00:03:06,960 --> 00:03:09,320 Oh, an actual list. Excellent. 59 00:03:09,320 --> 00:03:11,960 Ho-ho-ho-ho! Laura, look this way. 60 00:03:11,960 --> 00:03:13,960 And here's your present. 61 00:03:13,960 --> 00:03:15,960 Yeah, don't forget. 62 00:03:15,960 --> 00:03:17,960 Merry Christmas. Ho-ho-ho-ho-ho! 63 00:03:17,960 --> 00:03:19,960 Urgh, look at him. Martin. 64 00:03:22,960 --> 00:03:24,960 He keeps scratching. 65 00:03:24,960 --> 00:03:26,480 What, Santa? 66 00:03:26,480 --> 00:03:28,640 Well, he's probably just hot under the lights. 67 00:03:28,640 --> 00:03:30,960 Disgusting! Oi, Doc, move up. 68 00:03:30,960 --> 00:03:33,960 Ah, what do we have here? 69 00:03:33,960 --> 00:03:37,960 A smartly dressed young man with a very nice tie. 70 00:03:37,960 --> 00:03:39,960 Did you tie that yourself? 71 00:03:39,960 --> 00:03:41,960 How wonderful. 72 00:03:41,960 --> 00:03:42,960 And what do you want for Christmas? 73 00:03:42,960 --> 00:03:45,960 Look, don't, Martin. Excuse me. 74 00:03:45,960 --> 00:03:48,000 I'm afraid you'll have to join the queue, big boy. 75 00:03:48,000 --> 00:03:50,640 You keep scratching. Is there something wrong? 76 00:03:50,640 --> 00:03:53,320 Santa's got a new costume and the material's a bit itchy. 77 00:03:53,320 --> 00:03:56,000 Now, come and tell Santa what you want for Christmas. 78 00:03:56,000 --> 00:03:57,960 Uh-uh, no. Don't go any closer. 79 00:03:57,960 --> 00:03:59,960 He could be contagious. Let me see. 80 00:03:59,960 --> 00:04:01,960 You're being ridiculous. Show me, please. 81 00:04:03,960 --> 00:04:06,960 Doc, you're holding up the line! Leave Santa alone! 82 00:04:06,960 --> 00:04:09,960 Leave it, Martin. Excuse me, what's the hold-up? 83 00:04:09,960 --> 00:04:11,960 Here, Doc, you're gonna have to come out of there. 84 00:04:11,960 --> 00:04:14,960 This man has a potentially infectious disease. 85 00:04:14,960 --> 00:04:17,960 That rash could be shingles, erysipelas or scabies. 86 00:04:17,960 --> 00:04:19,960 A virus, a bacteria or a parasite. 87 00:04:19,960 --> 00:04:22,960 Do you really want to infect your children? Do you? 88 00:04:22,960 --> 00:04:24,960 Right, I want you to come with me. Seriously? 89 00:04:24,960 --> 00:04:27,160 Seriously. Come with me. You need to fumigate this place. 90 00:04:27,160 --> 00:04:28,960 Doc, I think you're over-reacting, just a tad. 91 00:04:28,960 --> 00:04:32,000 Shut it down. Come on. Sorry, he does mean well. 92 00:04:32,000 --> 00:04:34,960 Right, you heard what the doc said. Everybody out. 93 00:04:34,960 --> 00:04:37,960 Come on now. Out you go. I'm sorry, no returns. 94 00:04:37,960 --> 00:04:40,960 That's what I said, no returns. I'm sorry, don't be sad. 95 00:04:40,960 --> 00:04:43,000 We'll come back next year. 96 00:04:43,000 --> 00:04:45,960 There'll be other Santas, other grottos. 97 00:04:47,480 --> 00:04:49,960 You get on the examination table, please. 98 00:04:49,960 --> 00:04:51,960 Take off your boot and roll up your trouser leg. 99 00:04:52,960 --> 00:04:56,480 How long have you had this for? A week or so. 100 00:04:56,480 --> 00:04:59,160 I'm sorry, I can't hear what you're saying. Take that beard off. 101 00:05:04,960 --> 00:05:07,160 Probably allergic to the material in the costume. 102 00:05:07,160 --> 00:05:08,960 Do you have a history of allergies? 103 00:05:08,960 --> 00:05:12,960 No. Do you have a history of ruining Christmas? 104 00:05:12,960 --> 00:05:14,640 I didn't ruin Christmas. 105 00:05:14,640 --> 00:05:17,160 All those traumatised children who saw you drag away Santa 106 00:05:17,160 --> 00:05:18,960 might well disagree on that. 107 00:05:18,960 --> 00:05:20,960 It doesn't look like an allergic reaction to me. 108 00:05:20,960 --> 00:05:24,000 I'll do a punch biopsy. A biopsy? 109 00:05:24,000 --> 00:05:26,640 Won't I have to go to hospital for that? 110 00:05:26,640 --> 00:05:29,000 Er, no. This has a blade which removes 111 00:05:29,000 --> 00:05:31,960 a small plug of skin through the epidermis and the dermis, 112 00:05:31,960 --> 00:05:33,640 into the subcutaneous fat below. 113 00:05:33,640 --> 00:05:37,000 Do you have any other symptoms? At my age, there's always something. 114 00:05:37,000 --> 00:05:39,960 Aches and pains, wear and tear. 115 00:05:39,960 --> 00:05:44,960 I lost some weight. Stomach's been a bit dodgy. Probably nerves. 116 00:05:44,960 --> 00:05:45,960 Nerves? 117 00:05:45,960 --> 00:05:49,960 My job is to bring joy and wonder to the children of Portwenn. 118 00:05:49,960 --> 00:05:50,960 I take that seriously. 119 00:05:50,960 --> 00:05:53,960 Do you suffer from fatigue? I don't suffer, Doc. 120 00:05:53,960 --> 00:05:55,960 I enjoy the work. 121 00:05:55,960 --> 00:05:58,960 But, yes, it does take a lot out of me, I suppose. 122 00:05:58,960 --> 00:06:02,960 Right, I'll take a blood sample, check if you're anaemic or not. 123 00:06:02,960 --> 00:06:06,640 Poke away. So long as it lets me get back out there and do my job. 124 00:06:06,640 --> 00:06:08,960 Er, no, you're not to mix with children, I'm afraid. 125 00:06:08,960 --> 00:06:10,960 Until we've discovered if you're infectious or not. 126 00:06:12,960 --> 00:06:17,160 I-I've got a big surprise lined up for the village on Christmas Eve. 127 00:06:17,160 --> 00:06:18,960 I really don't wanna let folk down. 128 00:06:18,960 --> 00:06:21,960 I'm sorry, you're not going anywhere until we have your test results. 129 00:06:21,960 --> 00:06:23,960 I should have the blood available tomorrow 130 00:06:23,960 --> 00:06:25,960 and the biopsy sometime next week. 131 00:06:25,960 --> 00:06:27,960 Not a fan of Christmas, are you? 132 00:06:27,960 --> 00:06:30,800 I don't have any feelings about it either way. 133 00:06:30,800 --> 00:06:32,800 Doesn't come across my desk. 134 00:06:33,960 --> 00:06:37,320 Somebody needs to show you the true magic of the season, Doc. 135 00:06:37,320 --> 00:06:39,960 I'm sure they do, thank you. And we're finished for now. 136 00:06:46,320 --> 00:06:47,960 Close the door on your way out, please. 137 00:06:59,960 --> 00:07:01,960 How are you? 138 00:07:01,960 --> 00:07:03,960 Is Santa angry at us? 139 00:07:03,960 --> 00:07:06,960 No, of course not. 140 00:07:06,960 --> 00:07:10,480 I didn't get to meet him. 141 00:07:10,480 --> 00:07:13,960 I'm sorry. It's such a shame. 142 00:07:15,960 --> 00:07:16,960 Here, come and sit down. 143 00:07:20,960 --> 00:07:22,000 Aw... 144 00:07:22,000 --> 00:07:24,960 You know, when I was your age, 145 00:07:24,960 --> 00:07:27,640 Portwenn used to have a lantern parade on Christmas Eve. 146 00:07:27,640 --> 00:07:28,960 And it was so lovely. 147 00:07:28,960 --> 00:07:31,480 All these lights would be coming down the hill, 148 00:07:31,480 --> 00:07:33,640 with Santa Claus at the front. 149 00:07:33,640 --> 00:07:35,960 Can we do that? 150 00:07:35,960 --> 00:07:41,960 Well, no, cos someone would need to arrange and organise it. 151 00:07:41,960 --> 00:07:44,960 You could. Oh, I didn't mean me. 152 00:07:44,960 --> 00:07:47,960 And I could get to meet Santa. 153 00:07:47,960 --> 00:07:48,960 Well, yeah, you could, 154 00:07:48,960 --> 00:07:51,960 but it's Christmas Eve tomorrow, so... 155 00:07:51,960 --> 00:07:53,000 Please. 156 00:07:54,960 --> 00:07:56,960 ..so I suppose I'd better get a move on, right? 157 00:07:56,960 --> 00:07:58,960 Yes. 158 00:08:02,960 --> 00:08:04,960 Tomorrow? That's short notice. 159 00:08:04,960 --> 00:08:07,960 I just want James to have a Christmas he won't forget. 160 00:08:07,960 --> 00:08:11,160 You know, I have all these happy memories of it as a child. 161 00:08:11,160 --> 00:08:13,960 You know, the parade and the lights. 162 00:08:13,960 --> 00:08:16,160 And I still remember the little red bike my father gave me 163 00:08:16,160 --> 00:08:17,960 when I was four. 164 00:08:17,960 --> 00:08:20,640 Yes, probably stolen. Martin! 165 00:08:20,640 --> 00:08:22,960 PHONE RINGS 166 00:08:26,960 --> 00:08:28,960 Ellingham. 167 00:08:28,960 --> 00:08:30,480 Yes. 168 00:08:30,480 --> 00:08:31,960 I am. 169 00:08:35,160 --> 00:08:36,960 Ah... 170 00:08:36,960 --> 00:08:38,160 I see. 171 00:08:40,480 --> 00:08:41,960 Right. 172 00:08:41,960 --> 00:08:43,960 When would that be? 173 00:08:45,480 --> 00:08:47,960 Yes. I see. 174 00:08:49,960 --> 00:08:50,960 Thank you. 175 00:08:53,160 --> 00:08:54,960 Everything OK? 176 00:08:55,960 --> 00:08:59,000 Er, that was the, er, London Royal Hospital. 177 00:09:00,960 --> 00:09:03,480 My mother died of a heart attack at 11 o'clock this morning. 178 00:09:05,960 --> 00:09:07,960 Oh, Martin... 179 00:09:09,960 --> 00:09:11,160 I'm so sorry. 180 00:09:14,320 --> 00:09:16,160 I should tell Ruth, I suppose. 181 00:09:17,960 --> 00:09:19,960 After lunch, maybe. 182 00:09:22,960 --> 00:09:24,160 Come here. 183 00:09:30,960 --> 00:09:32,960 It's... I don't want the fish to get dry. 184 00:09:44,960 --> 00:09:47,160 There goes the Grinch. CHUCKLING 185 00:09:47,160 --> 00:09:48,960 Thanks for ruining Christmas! 186 00:09:48,960 --> 00:09:51,000 Tosser! Tosser! Tosser! 187 00:09:55,960 --> 00:09:57,960 KNOCK AT DOOR 188 00:10:01,960 --> 00:10:04,960 Hello, Martin. Come in. Thank you. 189 00:10:04,960 --> 00:10:09,960 You'll have to forgive me. I'm experimenting with eggnog. 190 00:10:11,960 --> 00:10:12,960 What is it? 191 00:10:12,960 --> 00:10:17,960 Er, my mother suffered a heart attack this morning and died. 192 00:10:17,960 --> 00:10:20,800 Oh, dear. 193 00:10:20,800 --> 00:10:23,160 I'm sorry to hear that. Mm. 194 00:10:23,160 --> 00:10:24,960 Erm... 195 00:10:24,960 --> 00:10:26,960 Oh, when will the funeral be? 196 00:10:26,960 --> 00:10:29,960 Sometime between Christmas and the new year. 197 00:10:29,960 --> 00:10:32,960 May I ask how you're feeling? 198 00:10:33,960 --> 00:10:36,320 Erm, I'm-I'm fine. We weren't very close. 199 00:10:36,320 --> 00:10:37,960 She was your mother. 200 00:10:37,960 --> 00:10:40,000 She stole my clock. 201 00:10:40,000 --> 00:10:42,960 Don't be too hard on yourself, Martin. 202 00:10:43,960 --> 00:10:46,960 Grief has a way of stealing up on us all, 203 00:10:46,960 --> 00:10:48,960 even when we think we're free of it. 204 00:10:48,960 --> 00:10:50,960 Honestly, I'm fine. 205 00:10:50,960 --> 00:10:52,960 Poor Margaret. 206 00:10:53,960 --> 00:10:57,960 I always hoped that she'd become the mother that you deserved, but... 207 00:10:59,960 --> 00:11:01,960 Oh, well, I won't speak ill of the dead. 208 00:11:03,960 --> 00:11:06,960 She was an awful woman and a terrible mother. 209 00:11:06,960 --> 00:11:08,960 I thought you weren't going to speak ill. 210 00:11:09,960 --> 00:11:10,960 I was being polite. 211 00:11:17,960 --> 00:11:19,320 'How much?' 212 00:11:20,960 --> 00:11:21,960 No, but seriously. 213 00:11:23,320 --> 00:11:25,960 Look, I know it's short notice, but... 214 00:11:26,960 --> 00:11:27,960 I'm gonna have to call you back. 215 00:11:29,960 --> 00:11:31,960 Hello, Louisa. What can I do for you? 216 00:11:31,960 --> 00:11:35,960 Joe, you've, er, got a little something on your face. 217 00:11:35,960 --> 00:11:39,160 It's for, erm, undercover work. 218 00:11:39,160 --> 00:11:41,960 Well, I'm here because I'd like to organise 219 00:11:41,960 --> 00:11:43,960 a lantern parade for tomorrow. 220 00:11:43,960 --> 00:11:45,960 A lantern parade? Haven't had one of those for years. 221 00:11:45,960 --> 00:11:48,960 Unfortunately, from a police standpoint, 222 00:11:48,960 --> 00:11:49,960 tomorrow's just not possible. 223 00:11:49,960 --> 00:11:53,640 Oh... Oh, that's a shame. Mm. 224 00:11:53,640 --> 00:11:56,000 Because I was gonna ask you to be Santa and lead the parade. 225 00:11:56,000 --> 00:12:00,960 Well, when I say not possible, I mean not... 226 00:12:00,960 --> 00:12:02,960 NOT possible. 227 00:12:02,960 --> 00:12:04,960 So it... it is possible? 228 00:12:04,960 --> 00:12:06,960 I'm here to help. What do we need? 229 00:12:06,960 --> 00:12:08,960 Well, we need lanterns. About 40 or 50. 230 00:12:08,960 --> 00:12:12,480 No problem. I'll talk to Bert. Great. And can you spread the word? 231 00:12:12,480 --> 00:12:15,960 Just to confirm, I shall be playing Santa Claus 232 00:12:15,960 --> 00:12:16,960 and leading the parade? 233 00:12:16,960 --> 00:12:19,960 Yeah. Wonderful. 234 00:12:19,960 --> 00:12:23,960 You know, between you and me, it's not really for undercover work. 235 00:12:25,960 --> 00:12:28,160 I know. I can see your costume hanging up at the back. 236 00:12:28,160 --> 00:12:31,960 Ha, very good. You should be a policeman. 237 00:12:31,960 --> 00:12:34,960 HUMMING A TUNE 238 00:12:45,640 --> 00:12:47,960 SHE GULPS 239 00:12:47,960 --> 00:12:50,960 GAGGING 240 00:12:52,521 --> 00:12:55,521 Mrs Tishell, I've come to pick up my medical supplies 241 00:12:55,521 --> 00:12:56,521 for the holiday period. 242 00:12:58,521 --> 00:13:00,561 What are you doing? Mrs Tishell? 243 00:13:00,561 --> 00:13:02,521 You're choking. 244 00:13:02,521 --> 00:13:04,521 Turn round. 245 00:13:11,521 --> 00:13:14,561 Got it? Oh... Oh... 246 00:13:14,561 --> 00:13:17,521 Right, just let go. Oh, thank you, Doctor. 247 00:13:17,521 --> 00:13:18,521 Let go. Let go of my arms. 248 00:13:18,521 --> 00:13:21,521 HOARSELY: Oh, thank you, Doctor. It went down the wrong way. 249 00:13:23,521 --> 00:13:25,361 You were choking before as well. 250 00:13:25,361 --> 00:13:27,521 Well, I-I-I do need to take more care in future. 251 00:13:27,521 --> 00:13:29,521 Why is your voice hoarse? 252 00:13:29,521 --> 00:13:33,041 Cos I was singing carols yesterday. You saved my life, Doctor. 253 00:13:33,041 --> 00:13:35,521 Come here into the light. Oh... 254 00:13:37,521 --> 00:13:40,521 Mmm... Mm, mm, mm! 255 00:13:41,521 --> 00:13:43,521 No, no, no! 256 00:13:43,521 --> 00:13:45,521 But the mistletoe...! No! 257 00:13:45,521 --> 00:13:47,521 No, I'll come and collect my supplies later. 258 00:13:47,521 --> 00:13:49,521 I'm sorry, Doc! I-I had to. 259 00:13:49,521 --> 00:13:51,521 Cos this might be my last... 260 00:13:51,521 --> 00:13:53,521 my last Christmas. 261 00:13:57,521 --> 00:14:00,521 There you go, John. Cheers, Bert. Merry Christmas. 262 00:14:01,521 --> 00:14:05,521 I know the doc has a job to do, but so do I. 263 00:14:05,521 --> 00:14:09,521 And it's not fair, you know? It's just not fair. 264 00:14:09,521 --> 00:14:11,521 Yes, we know. You keep on saying, Leonard. 265 00:14:11,521 --> 00:14:15,521 Sorry. Don't mean to go on about it. It's all right. 266 00:14:15,521 --> 00:14:17,561 If you can't go to your local for a drink and a moan, 267 00:14:17,561 --> 00:14:20,561 where can you go? It's good to see you in here again. 268 00:14:20,561 --> 00:14:22,521 It's been a while. 269 00:14:22,521 --> 00:14:24,521 It's the children I feel sorry for. 270 00:14:24,521 --> 00:14:27,521 It's a bit of magic in their lives. 271 00:14:27,521 --> 00:14:29,521 Takes me months to make these. 272 00:14:30,521 --> 00:14:32,561 I don't blame the doc. 273 00:14:32,561 --> 00:14:35,521 No, he's to be pitied. 274 00:14:35,521 --> 00:14:37,521 He just... 275 00:14:37,521 --> 00:14:40,361 He just doesn't get it. 276 00:14:40,361 --> 00:14:44,041 But don't worry, Santa isn't done yet. 277 00:14:44,041 --> 00:14:45,881 Oh! 278 00:14:45,881 --> 00:14:48,521 I think Santa's done for the day at least. 279 00:14:48,521 --> 00:14:50,881 Best go home and sleep it off, eh? 280 00:14:50,881 --> 00:14:54,521 This isn't like you. Do you need me to call you a taxi? 281 00:14:54,521 --> 00:14:56,521 No, it's OK. 282 00:14:56,521 --> 00:14:58,521 I've got a sleigh. 283 00:14:58,521 --> 00:15:01,521 Sorry, she kissed you? Yeah. 284 00:15:01,521 --> 00:15:03,041 On the cheek or...? 285 00:15:03,041 --> 00:15:05,521 No, no, no. On the... Smack on the mouth. 286 00:15:05,521 --> 00:15:08,521 Maybe she was aiming for the cheek. No, she wasn't. 287 00:15:08,521 --> 00:15:09,521 It was quite shocking. 288 00:15:09,521 --> 00:15:11,521 And there was this peculiar metallic tang, 289 00:15:11,521 --> 00:15:13,521 which didn't make it any better. 290 00:15:13,521 --> 00:15:15,521 I'm not sure I wanna know all the details now, thank you. 291 00:15:15,521 --> 00:15:17,521 Oh, I don't blame you. 292 00:15:17,521 --> 00:15:20,521 Did she say why she did it? Something about mistletoe. 293 00:15:20,521 --> 00:15:22,521 FOOTSTEPS APPROACH 294 00:15:22,521 --> 00:15:25,361 I've brushed my teeth and I'm ready for bed. 295 00:15:25,361 --> 00:15:27,041 Oh, would you like me to come and read to you? 296 00:15:27,041 --> 00:15:28,521 No. It's the new one. 297 00:15:28,521 --> 00:15:30,521 I said NO. 298 00:15:30,521 --> 00:15:32,521 James, you don't raise your voice to your father. 299 00:15:32,521 --> 00:15:34,521 LOW RUMBLING, STONES CLATTERING 300 00:15:34,521 --> 00:15:36,521 What is that?! Oh, my God! 301 00:15:36,521 --> 00:15:40,041 THUDDING It's coming from upstairs. 302 00:15:40,041 --> 00:15:42,521 It's on the roof. It's Santa Claus! 303 00:15:42,521 --> 00:15:44,521 Don't be ridiculous. 304 00:15:44,521 --> 00:15:45,521 DOG BARKING 305 00:15:45,521 --> 00:15:48,521 Ho-ho-ho! 306 00:15:49,521 --> 00:15:52,201 What are you doing up there?! 307 00:15:52,201 --> 00:15:55,521 I'm showing you the magic of Christmas! 308 00:15:55,521 --> 00:15:56,721 Well, get down, right now. 309 00:15:56,721 --> 00:15:59,521 Ho-ho-ho-ho! 310 00:15:59,521 --> 00:16:03,521 What's going on? I saw the commotion from The Platt. Wait, is that...? 311 00:16:03,521 --> 00:16:05,521 It's Santa Claus! 312 00:16:05,521 --> 00:16:07,521 Well, maybe to the untrained eye. 313 00:16:07,521 --> 00:16:09,521 You need to get up there and get that man down. 314 00:16:09,521 --> 00:16:11,521 He is drunk, he's a danger to himself and my property. 315 00:16:11,521 --> 00:16:14,521 Follow me. Please don't hurt Santa. 316 00:16:16,521 --> 00:16:18,521 Ho-ho-ho-ho! 317 00:16:27,521 --> 00:16:29,521 All right, Leonard? 318 00:16:29,521 --> 00:16:31,521 That's not my name. 319 00:16:31,521 --> 00:16:33,521 All right... Santa? 320 00:16:33,521 --> 00:16:36,521 Why don't you just come over here 321 00:16:36,521 --> 00:16:38,521 nice and slowly...? Is he coming? 322 00:16:38,521 --> 00:16:42,561 That man needs to learn the true meaning of Christmas. 323 00:16:42,561 --> 00:16:45,521 Oh, he just wants to teach you the true meaning of Christmas. 324 00:16:45,521 --> 00:16:48,521 No, get back up there, go and get him! 325 00:16:48,521 --> 00:16:51,521 OK, OK. Ah, ah... 326 00:16:56,521 --> 00:16:57,521 Ah... 327 00:16:57,521 --> 00:17:01,521 Well... unless the true meaning of Christmas 328 00:17:01,521 --> 00:17:04,521 is that he's gonna get his chimney blocked, 329 00:17:04,521 --> 00:17:06,881 I suggest... 330 00:17:06,881 --> 00:17:09,521 Oh, that's a big drop! 331 00:17:11,521 --> 00:17:14,521 It could... It could make you feel a bit, a bit... 332 00:17:14,521 --> 00:17:17,521 Whoa! PANTING 333 00:17:17,521 --> 00:17:19,521 Don't let go, Leonard! 334 00:17:19,521 --> 00:17:20,521 That's not my name! 335 00:17:20,521 --> 00:17:22,561 Santa! Don't let go, Santa! 336 00:17:22,561 --> 00:17:24,521 I won't. HE GRUNTS 337 00:17:24,521 --> 00:17:26,521 Oh, God. 338 00:17:26,521 --> 00:17:29,521 Oh, oh, oh... Argh... 339 00:17:29,521 --> 00:17:32,521 Whoops. Oh, don't say whoops! Argh! 340 00:17:32,521 --> 00:17:34,201 Ah, ah, ah... 341 00:17:35,521 --> 00:17:38,041 Thanks, Doc. It wasn't me. 342 00:17:38,041 --> 00:17:41,521 It was just everything started moving. I went dizzy. 343 00:17:41,521 --> 00:17:43,361 It's vertigo. 344 00:17:43,361 --> 00:17:45,561 And you're drunk and a disgrace. Come down. 345 00:17:45,561 --> 00:17:47,521 Merry Christmas, Doc! 346 00:17:52,521 --> 00:17:55,521 What on Earth were you thinking of? Sorry, Doc. 347 00:17:55,521 --> 00:17:58,521 I suppose I get a bit emotional this time of the year. 348 00:17:58,521 --> 00:18:00,521 I had a few drinks. 349 00:18:00,521 --> 00:18:03,721 Normally don't touch the stuff. A few drinks? You're drunk. 350 00:18:03,721 --> 00:18:05,521 It was only two. 351 00:18:05,521 --> 00:18:07,521 Really? Well, you must have a very low tolerance for alcohol. 352 00:18:07,521 --> 00:18:09,521 I suggest you keep avoiding it. 353 00:18:09,521 --> 00:18:12,561 That was incredibly irresponsible. The harm you could've done yourself 354 00:18:12,561 --> 00:18:15,201 or Penhale. Not to mention my family. 355 00:18:15,201 --> 00:18:16,881 Lucky I was there to save you. 356 00:18:16,881 --> 00:18:19,521 Right, come on, I'll drive you home. 357 00:18:22,521 --> 00:18:24,521 At least your son got to see Santa. 358 00:18:24,521 --> 00:18:26,881 Yes, if he'd been really lucky, he'd have seen Santa 359 00:18:26,881 --> 00:18:28,521 fall off the roof and break his neck. 360 00:18:34,521 --> 00:18:35,521 James... 361 00:18:38,561 --> 00:18:40,521 HE SIGHS 362 00:19:03,680 --> 00:19:05,680 Look what Santa brought... 363 00:19:18,680 --> 00:19:20,360 Hello? 364 00:19:21,680 --> 00:19:22,680 Hello? 365 00:19:22,680 --> 00:19:25,200 DOG BARKS 366 00:19:25,200 --> 00:19:28,680 DOG BARKS, GROWLS 367 00:19:28,680 --> 00:19:30,680 DOG BARKS 368 00:19:30,680 --> 00:19:32,680 No! Ow! 369 00:19:32,680 --> 00:19:33,720 Out, out, OUT! 370 00:19:33,720 --> 00:19:36,680 Why is it in here? I wonder what's wrong. 371 00:19:36,680 --> 00:19:39,680 It's a dog. That's what's wrong. It's always barking. 372 00:19:39,680 --> 00:19:41,680 No, it's-it's not always barking. 373 00:19:41,680 --> 00:19:44,680 And it's never at this time in the morning. 374 00:19:45,720 --> 00:19:47,680 BARKING CONTINUES 375 00:19:47,680 --> 00:19:48,680 Martin? Yes. 376 00:19:48,680 --> 00:19:51,680 James has gone! What? Where? 377 00:19:51,680 --> 00:19:55,200 I don't know, he's left this note. It says he's gone to the North Pole. 378 00:19:55,200 --> 00:19:58,680 Oh, James is a smart, sensible boy, he wouldn't do that. 379 00:19:58,680 --> 00:20:01,360 He's not in his room and you're literally holding a note 380 00:20:01,360 --> 00:20:03,040 saying he's gone. All right, I'll get dressed 381 00:20:03,040 --> 00:20:04,520 and we'll go and find him. 382 00:20:04,520 --> 00:20:06,680 Yeah, maybe he's just hiding in the house somewhere. 383 00:20:06,680 --> 00:20:09,680 James, James! Come on, hurry up. James! 384 00:20:09,680 --> 00:20:11,680 He's never done anything like this before. 385 00:20:11,680 --> 00:20:13,680 I think it's cos his head's been filled with 386 00:20:13,680 --> 00:20:15,680 all this Father Christmas stuff. 387 00:20:15,680 --> 00:20:18,680 Well, you're the one who practically dragged Santa out the grotto, 388 00:20:18,680 --> 00:20:20,680 then shouted at him yesterday. 389 00:20:20,680 --> 00:20:22,680 Well, he was on our roof! 390 00:20:22,680 --> 00:20:24,680 But James doesn't get that. He just.. 391 00:20:24,680 --> 00:20:27,680 He just sees you ruining Christmas. I'm not ruining Christmas! 392 00:20:27,680 --> 00:20:30,680 Is it so bad that he might enjoy it? 393 00:20:30,680 --> 00:20:33,680 Even you must have some happy memories of it as a child. 394 00:20:33,680 --> 00:20:35,680 No, I don't. MOBILE PHONE RINGS 395 00:20:35,680 --> 00:20:38,680 Well, isn't that a good reason to make sure that James and Mary do? 396 00:20:38,680 --> 00:20:40,680 Ruth. 397 00:20:41,680 --> 00:20:42,880 Yes. 398 00:20:42,880 --> 00:20:44,680 We're on our way. 399 00:20:44,680 --> 00:20:46,680 She's got him. She's giving him breakfast. 400 00:20:46,680 --> 00:20:48,880 Oh, thank goodness. Right, but I'll pick him up. 401 00:20:48,880 --> 00:20:51,680 I'm sorry, Martin, it's just that under the circumstances, 402 00:20:51,680 --> 00:20:54,680 I think it's better that I go there alone. 403 00:20:54,680 --> 00:20:55,680 Right. 404 00:20:58,680 --> 00:21:00,680 DOG BARKS 405 00:21:01,680 --> 00:21:02,680 Shut up. 406 00:21:14,680 --> 00:21:17,680 Oh, good morning, Doc. Oh, you're all wet. 407 00:21:17,680 --> 00:21:19,680 I want to talk about yesterday. 408 00:21:19,680 --> 00:21:22,680 Oh, s... Oh, I'm so sorry. I'm very sorry. 409 00:21:22,680 --> 00:21:27,680 Erm, I know it was unprofessional and that you're probably very angry. 410 00:21:27,680 --> 00:21:31,680 Unless you're not... and you want to suggest that we elope together, 411 00:21:31,680 --> 00:21:34,880 slipping away into the night... No. No. No! 412 00:21:36,680 --> 00:21:38,680 When you forced your mouth against mine yesterday, 413 00:21:38,680 --> 00:21:40,680 I noticed a strong acidic taste. 414 00:21:40,680 --> 00:21:43,680 And yesterday I saw you choke twice, on two different occasions. 415 00:21:43,680 --> 00:21:45,680 Also, your voice is very hoarse. 416 00:21:45,680 --> 00:21:47,360 Well that's cos I've been singing carols. 417 00:21:47,360 --> 00:21:50,680 And I am sorry, but I have to close for lunch. 418 00:21:50,680 --> 00:21:51,680 It's 8:15 in the morning. 419 00:21:52,333 --> 00:21:54,653 Well, I'm... I'm not ill, Doctor. 420 00:21:54,653 --> 00:21:56,653 Do you get a sensation like there's a lump in your throat 421 00:21:56,653 --> 00:21:58,653 when you swallow? No. 422 00:21:58,653 --> 00:22:02,653 No, because that would be very worrying if I thought that... 423 00:22:03,653 --> 00:22:05,173 Yes. 424 00:22:05,173 --> 00:22:07,653 You can read me like a book, Doctor. 425 00:22:07,653 --> 00:22:09,653 Hmm. Let me take a look. 426 00:22:10,653 --> 00:22:12,653 Ah, oh... 427 00:22:16,653 --> 00:22:18,493 I first noticed it a couple of weeks ago. 428 00:22:18,493 --> 00:22:20,853 And I feel something every time I swallow. 429 00:22:20,853 --> 00:22:25,653 An enlarged lymph node. I know what that means, Doctor. 430 00:22:25,653 --> 00:22:27,693 Stop talking. Open your mouth and tilt your head back. 431 00:22:27,693 --> 00:22:29,653 Don't try to kiss me. 432 00:22:31,653 --> 00:22:32,653 Ahh! Swallow. 433 00:22:32,653 --> 00:22:36,653 SHE GULPS Yes. You have GORD. 434 00:22:36,653 --> 00:22:38,653 Gastroesophageal reflux disease. 435 00:22:38,653 --> 00:22:40,653 I'll prescribe Omeprazole, but we should keep an eye on it. 436 00:22:40,653 --> 00:22:42,653 Chronic inflammation of the oesophagus over time 437 00:22:42,653 --> 00:22:45,653 could lead to more serious complications and damage. 438 00:22:45,653 --> 00:22:50,653 What, so, basically... 439 00:22:50,653 --> 00:22:51,853 heartburn? 440 00:22:51,853 --> 00:22:53,653 Yes. I'm not dying? 441 00:22:53,653 --> 00:22:56,493 No, not yet. Hold still. 442 00:23:00,333 --> 00:23:02,653 Mm. Normal movement. 443 00:23:02,653 --> 00:23:04,653 Your prolapsed disc must have healed. 444 00:23:04,653 --> 00:23:06,653 You don't need to wear the neck brace any more. 445 00:23:06,653 --> 00:23:09,173 Oh, I-I-I think just to be on the safe side... 446 00:23:09,173 --> 00:23:11,013 There is no safe side. You just don't need to. 447 00:23:11,013 --> 00:23:15,653 Maybe just pop it back on for a few minutes. Not more, I-I... 448 00:23:15,653 --> 00:23:17,653 If you have an issue with taking it off, 449 00:23:17,653 --> 00:23:19,653 then I can refer you to a clinical psychologist if you like. 450 00:23:21,493 --> 00:23:24,653 No. There's no need for that. 451 00:23:24,653 --> 00:23:26,653 Consider it gone. 452 00:23:27,653 --> 00:23:31,333 And thank you, Doctor, for your infinite patience and understanding. 453 00:23:31,333 --> 00:23:32,653 Yes. 454 00:23:53,653 --> 00:23:54,653 Medical supplies, please. 455 00:23:54,653 --> 00:23:56,653 Yes, Doctor. 456 00:24:01,693 --> 00:24:03,653 Thank you. 457 00:24:08,653 --> 00:24:10,653 I was just coming back from the newsagents 458 00:24:10,653 --> 00:24:12,653 and I saw him strolling down the street. 459 00:24:12,653 --> 00:24:15,333 I managed to persuade him to have some breakfast 460 00:24:15,333 --> 00:24:18,653 before he continued his journey to the North Pole. 461 00:24:18,653 --> 00:24:21,653 WEATHER REPORT ON TV: '..freezing conditions, sub-zero. 462 00:24:21,653 --> 00:24:24,653 'And you can see there's a strong band of low pressure...' 463 00:24:24,653 --> 00:24:26,653 What you did was very wrong, James. 464 00:24:26,653 --> 00:24:30,173 You can't just go walking off like that. 465 00:24:30,173 --> 00:24:32,653 Mummy and Daddy were very worried. 466 00:24:32,653 --> 00:24:34,653 '..with a good chance of some snow on the higher ground. 467 00:24:34,653 --> 00:24:36,653 'And that's gonna give some of us in Cornwall...' 468 00:24:36,653 --> 00:24:38,333 It says it might snow. 469 00:24:38,333 --> 00:24:39,653 '..a white Christmas...' 470 00:24:39,653 --> 00:24:41,653 You won't need to go to the North Pole now, will you? 471 00:24:41,653 --> 00:24:43,693 Doesn't matter. I hate Christmas! 472 00:24:43,693 --> 00:24:45,653 He's just like his father. 473 00:24:45,653 --> 00:24:47,653 Well, no. No, he's not, Ruth. 474 00:24:47,653 --> 00:24:50,653 Because, actually, Daddy's very much looking forward to seeing Santa 475 00:24:50,653 --> 00:24:51,653 at the parade tonight as well. 476 00:24:51,653 --> 00:24:53,333 Really? 477 00:24:53,333 --> 00:24:54,653 Of course. 478 00:24:54,653 --> 00:24:57,653 So, why don't you go and clean up your bowl and we'll get on home? 479 00:25:05,493 --> 00:25:07,653 SONG: 'Twelve Days Of Christmas' 480 00:25:14,653 --> 00:25:16,653 SHE SCREAMS, CHICKENS CLUCK 481 00:25:16,653 --> 00:25:18,173 FLAPPING 482 00:25:18,173 --> 00:25:19,653 SHE WHIMPERS 483 00:25:26,653 --> 00:25:27,653 'Be honest, Doc, how bad is it?' 484 00:25:27,653 --> 00:25:30,653 It's just a few minor scratches. Oh, God. 485 00:25:30,653 --> 00:25:33,013 I've probably caught all kinds of horrible diseases. 486 00:25:33,013 --> 00:25:35,653 Diseases from birds are usually spread by inhaling the dust 487 00:25:35,653 --> 00:25:36,653 from their droppings. 488 00:25:36,653 --> 00:25:39,173 Worst a scratch'll do is give you a mild superficial infection. 489 00:25:39,173 --> 00:25:41,013 Did you just say super-infection? 490 00:25:41,013 --> 00:25:42,653 No, I said superficial infection. 491 00:25:42,653 --> 00:25:45,173 This is hardly the emergency you said it was. 492 00:25:45,173 --> 00:25:47,653 Hello, hello, hell...! Oh. 493 00:25:47,653 --> 00:25:49,853 Oh, Doc, what are you doing here? What's happened? 494 00:25:49,853 --> 00:25:52,653 Some psycho left birds in a box to attack me. 495 00:25:52,653 --> 00:25:54,653 They didn't attack you. They scratched you. 496 00:25:54,653 --> 00:25:55,653 The doc's right. 497 00:25:55,653 --> 00:25:58,653 Bit soon to be using inflammatory language like psycho. 498 00:25:58,653 --> 00:26:01,653 Maybe someone just wanted to give you a gift. 499 00:26:01,653 --> 00:26:04,653 What, a gift of three chickens?! And then there's the note. 500 00:26:04,653 --> 00:26:07,653 "This is only the beginning." That's a threat if ever I heard one. 501 00:26:07,653 --> 00:26:09,653 Bye. Er, no. Wait up, Doc. 502 00:26:09,653 --> 00:26:13,333 Er, Louisa asked me to look after the kids. I'll be safer there. 503 00:26:13,333 --> 00:26:14,653 Joe, deal with those. 504 00:26:14,653 --> 00:26:17,333 CHICKENS CLUCK 505 00:26:19,653 --> 00:26:23,333 Oh. Good morning! Oh, hello, Agatha. 506 00:26:23,333 --> 00:26:26,653 I'm afraid the surgery isn't open till after Christmas now. 507 00:26:26,653 --> 00:26:30,653 Oh, no, I've come to see you. Official Parish Council business. 508 00:26:30,653 --> 00:26:32,653 Oh, right. OK. 509 00:26:32,653 --> 00:26:34,653 Of course. Erm... 510 00:26:34,653 --> 00:26:35,653 She does realise 511 00:26:35,653 --> 00:26:39,653 that that turkey is gonna end up on someone's dinner table? 512 00:26:39,653 --> 00:26:43,333 Yeah, course she does. Who's a good boy? Yeah, you are. 513 00:26:43,333 --> 00:26:45,173 You know, I've made almost as much from selling 514 00:26:45,173 --> 00:26:46,653 guess-the-weight raffle tickets 515 00:26:46,653 --> 00:26:49,653 than I have had from selling food these past few days. 516 00:26:49,653 --> 00:26:52,013 The great thing is, the chances of someone actually guessing 517 00:26:52,013 --> 00:26:55,653 the weight of that bird are close to zero. Oh, dear. 518 00:26:55,653 --> 00:26:58,653 It's a shame that Christmas comes but once a year. 519 00:26:58,653 --> 00:27:00,653 Here we go. Pop it over there. 520 00:27:01,653 --> 00:27:05,653 I got some battery lanterns, candle ones, 521 00:27:05,653 --> 00:27:07,653 and some of those fancy sky ones. 522 00:27:07,653 --> 00:27:10,653 Here, were they expensive? 523 00:27:10,653 --> 00:27:13,493 It doesn't matter, Bert. It's Christmas. 524 00:27:13,493 --> 00:27:16,653 We're not gonna charge for them. Oh, no, of course not. 525 00:27:18,493 --> 00:27:21,653 TURKEY CLUCKS, GOBBLES 526 00:27:21,653 --> 00:27:25,653 Sorry, Agatha, we had a little bit of an incident here today. 527 00:27:25,653 --> 00:27:27,653 Oh. SHE CHUCKLES 528 00:27:27,653 --> 00:27:30,653 Would you like some tea? Oh, no, thank you. 529 00:27:30,653 --> 00:27:32,653 I understand you're planning a lantern parade this evening? 530 00:27:32,653 --> 00:27:34,653 Yes. Well, it's a bit last-minute, 531 00:27:34,653 --> 00:27:37,653 but it's all coming together, touch wood. 532 00:27:37,653 --> 00:27:40,653 CHUCKLING: How wonderful. Although, you know the rules. 533 00:27:40,653 --> 00:27:43,653 You haven't lodged your event notification form with the council 534 00:27:43,653 --> 00:27:46,653 60 days prior to the event and had it ratified. 535 00:27:46,653 --> 00:27:51,013 No. I thought as it's just a few people walking down the street... 536 00:27:51,013 --> 00:27:53,653 Oh... A few people walking down the street... 537 00:27:53,653 --> 00:27:58,333 It's a bit like saying a rock concert is a few people in a field. 538 00:28:00,653 --> 00:28:03,653 Agatha, James is really looking forward to this. 539 00:28:03,653 --> 00:28:05,653 I know the village feels the same. 540 00:28:05,653 --> 00:28:08,653 And it really will just be a few people with lanterns... 541 00:28:08,653 --> 00:28:10,693 Hi, guys. 542 00:28:10,693 --> 00:28:13,653 Martin, this is Agatha. She's from the Parish Council. 543 00:28:13,653 --> 00:28:15,653 Doctor Ellingham. Yes. 544 00:28:15,653 --> 00:28:17,173 Apologies if I look a little flustered. 545 00:28:17,173 --> 00:28:19,653 I've just been attacked by some birds. 546 00:28:19,653 --> 00:28:20,693 Oh, my. It was nothing. 547 00:28:20,693 --> 00:28:23,493 Oh, sure! "Lose one eye, get another." 548 00:28:23,493 --> 00:28:24,653 That must have been horrible. 549 00:28:24,653 --> 00:28:27,653 Those awful things with their mean, little beaks 550 00:28:27,653 --> 00:28:28,653 and lifeless, black eyes. 551 00:28:28,653 --> 00:28:31,653 I know! Thankfully, Janice survived. 552 00:28:31,653 --> 00:28:34,653 I know she's really looking forward to the parade as well. 553 00:28:34,653 --> 00:28:35,653 I'm not really that bothered... 554 00:28:35,653 --> 00:28:38,853 But, yes, very much so. 555 00:28:38,853 --> 00:28:41,653 Janice, can you check on Mary, please? 556 00:28:41,653 --> 00:28:42,653 Yes. 557 00:28:47,173 --> 00:28:50,653 Is there any way we can get the event signed off by this evening? 558 00:28:51,653 --> 00:28:52,853 This isn't about paperwork. 559 00:28:52,853 --> 00:28:55,653 This is about the safety of the village 560 00:28:55,653 --> 00:28:57,693 during the most dangerous time of the year. 561 00:28:57,693 --> 00:29:00,653 Well, I'm not sure Christmas is that dangerous. 562 00:29:00,653 --> 00:29:01,693 Oh, really? 563 00:29:01,693 --> 00:29:05,653 Over-eating. People drinking too much alcohol. 564 00:29:05,653 --> 00:29:07,653 Suppose there is a little bit of that, yeah. 565 00:29:07,653 --> 00:29:09,653 Then there's injuries from putting up decorations, 566 00:29:09,653 --> 00:29:13,653 injuries from taking them down, candles, fires, indigestion, 567 00:29:13,653 --> 00:29:17,653 food poisoning, allergies, choking, slipping on snow, slipping on ice... 568 00:29:17,653 --> 00:29:19,653 Have you ever seen a Christmas tree catch alight? 569 00:29:19,653 --> 00:29:22,333 I don't know why people have them in their homes. 570 00:29:22,333 --> 00:29:25,173 They're incendiary devices. And don't forget batteries, 571 00:29:25,173 --> 00:29:26,653 which children seem to swallow all day long 572 00:29:26,653 --> 00:29:28,493 during the Christmas holidays, 573 00:29:28,493 --> 00:29:29,653 leaking corrosive acid into the stomach 574 00:29:29,653 --> 00:29:31,653 and destroying its lining. They're quite lethal. 575 00:29:31,653 --> 00:29:34,653 I did forget them! Thank you, doctor. 576 00:29:34,653 --> 00:29:37,173 Yes, thank you, Martin (!) 577 00:29:37,173 --> 00:29:40,333 You know, we've got a meeting now about the parade. 578 00:29:40,333 --> 00:29:44,013 Why don't you come along and see that there's nothing to worry about? 579 00:29:44,013 --> 00:29:46,653 I suppose I could. Great. 580 00:29:46,653 --> 00:29:48,693 Martin, try and speak to James. Make sure he's OK. 581 00:29:48,693 --> 00:29:50,653 Yes. 582 00:29:50,653 --> 00:29:53,333 Come along, we should get going. Oh. Um... 583 00:29:53,333 --> 00:29:56,653 So, if nobody wins, do we get to keep Toby? 584 00:29:56,653 --> 00:29:58,653 I don't know. I hadn't really thought about it. 585 00:29:58,653 --> 00:30:00,653 Chances are someone's guessed it correctly. 586 00:30:00,653 --> 00:30:03,653 Maybe. Maybe not. 587 00:30:03,653 --> 00:30:05,653 The plan is for people to start at the school 588 00:30:05,653 --> 00:30:09,013 and make their way down here to the Christmas tree at The Platt. 589 00:30:09,013 --> 00:30:12,013 That's relatively straight-forward. Yeah, yeah, well, it is. 590 00:30:12,013 --> 00:30:14,653 So, we all set, Louisa? Not quite. 591 00:30:14,653 --> 00:30:18,013 Apparently, we need permission from Portwenn Parish Council. 592 00:30:18,013 --> 00:30:21,653 Erm, Agatha, you know Joe Penhale and Bert Large, don't you? 593 00:30:21,653 --> 00:30:23,653 I am aware of them both, yes. 594 00:30:23,653 --> 00:30:27,333 What safety procedures have you in play for the parade? 595 00:30:27,333 --> 00:30:33,653 Well... they're just walking from up there to there, so... 596 00:30:33,653 --> 00:30:36,653 I thought I'd use the 1986 Public Order Act as my framework. 597 00:30:36,653 --> 00:30:40,653 Although, for me, the 1936 original was far more effective. 598 00:30:40,653 --> 00:30:42,493 But then I'm just a police officer 599 00:30:42,493 --> 00:30:44,653 with the lowest crime rate in Devon and Cornwall 600 00:30:44,653 --> 00:30:45,653 five years running, so what do I know? 601 00:30:45,653 --> 00:30:47,653 That's true. 602 00:30:47,653 --> 00:30:48,653 High-vis jackets? 603 00:30:48,653 --> 00:30:51,333 Please! I don't get out of bed in the morning 604 00:30:51,333 --> 00:30:52,653 without a high-vis jacket on. 605 00:30:52,653 --> 00:30:54,653 LAUGHTER 606 00:30:54,653 --> 00:30:57,653 Have you got a health and safety protocol? 607 00:30:57,653 --> 00:30:59,653 Er, no, not as such. 608 00:30:59,653 --> 00:31:03,653 But then, you know, we-we only had a day and... 609 00:31:03,653 --> 00:31:05,653 Well, so what? So what?! 610 00:31:05,653 --> 00:31:08,653 Yes. So what! You know, the village needs this. 611 00:31:08,653 --> 00:31:12,013 To be able to come together and celebrate as a community. 612 00:31:12,013 --> 00:31:14,653 The benefits surely outweigh the risks. 613 00:31:14,653 --> 00:31:17,653 Agatha, you're the only person that can make it happen. 614 00:31:17,653 --> 00:31:19,173 Or not. 615 00:31:20,653 --> 00:31:22,653 I suppose it's only a short walk. 616 00:31:22,653 --> 00:31:25,013 Great. So we're OK for tonight? 617 00:31:25,013 --> 00:31:27,653 TURKEY GOBBLES Is that a turkey? 618 00:31:27,653 --> 00:31:31,653 Er, excuse me, why have you got livestock next to a food truck? 619 00:31:31,653 --> 00:31:33,333 It's unhygienic. 620 00:31:33,333 --> 00:31:37,493 He's called Toby and he's not unhygienic, he's very clean. 621 00:31:37,493 --> 00:31:39,653 I gave him a bath this morning. And we're just weighing him 622 00:31:39,653 --> 00:31:41,653 to see if anyone's won the competition. 623 00:31:41,653 --> 00:31:44,653 What competition? Well, guess its weight correctly 624 00:31:44,653 --> 00:31:46,653 and it could end up on your table this Christmas. 625 00:31:46,653 --> 00:31:47,853 Unfortunately, nobody got it right. 626 00:31:47,853 --> 00:31:50,493 Here, have a go. On the house. 627 00:31:50,493 --> 00:31:51,853 Oh, I don't know... 628 00:31:51,853 --> 00:31:53,693 Nine pounds, 11 ounces. 629 00:31:56,653 --> 00:31:58,653 That is amazing. How did you do that? 630 00:31:58,653 --> 00:32:00,653 Wait, I won?! 631 00:32:00,653 --> 00:32:03,653 I don't like birds, and definitely not that one. 632 00:32:03,653 --> 00:32:04,853 He's not asking you to look after it. 633 00:32:04,853 --> 00:32:06,653 It's for Christmas lunch. 634 00:32:06,653 --> 00:32:08,653 Yeah, we'll get the butcher to deliver it later. 635 00:32:08,653 --> 00:32:10,653 Or you could have the satisfaction of knowing you were correct 636 00:32:10,653 --> 00:32:12,653 and leave it at that. 637 00:32:12,653 --> 00:32:15,653 Mor, it is a turkey, it's Christmas. It's had a good, long life. 638 00:32:15,653 --> 00:32:18,653 Not that long. Christmas turkeys are usually five months old. 639 00:32:18,653 --> 00:32:22,693 Well, we've all learned something new today. So, the parade... 640 00:32:22,693 --> 00:32:25,653 So, the butcher will kill it and chop it up for me? 641 00:32:25,653 --> 00:32:27,653 Yeah. All part of the prize. 642 00:32:27,653 --> 00:32:29,653 See what it's like when a community comes together. 643 00:32:29,653 --> 00:32:31,653 AGATHA CHUCKLES 644 00:32:31,653 --> 00:32:33,653 He does seem like a healthy specimen. 645 00:32:33,653 --> 00:32:36,013 TURKEY GOBBLES Oh, my! Oh! 646 00:32:46,700 --> 00:32:48,700 Mr Maitland, this is Doctor Ellingham. 647 00:32:48,700 --> 00:32:49,700 I have your test results. 648 00:32:49,700 --> 00:32:51,900 Can you please call me as soon as you get this? Thank you. 649 00:32:51,900 --> 00:32:54,220 DOG BARKS James... 650 00:32:54,220 --> 00:32:56,700 Can you ask your dog to be quiet, please? 651 00:32:56,700 --> 00:32:57,700 DOG WHIMPERS 652 00:32:57,700 --> 00:32:58,740 James? 653 00:33:02,700 --> 00:33:04,060 James?! 654 00:33:07,700 --> 00:33:08,700 DOG BARKS 655 00:33:08,700 --> 00:33:10,700 Downstairs, shoo! 656 00:33:12,700 --> 00:33:13,700 Hello, James. 657 00:33:16,700 --> 00:33:17,700 You're upset with me. 658 00:33:20,700 --> 00:33:21,900 Mmm. 659 00:33:28,380 --> 00:33:32,540 When I was your age, I'd wake up on Christmas morning... 660 00:33:34,060 --> 00:33:36,900 ..and at the end of my bed, every year, 661 00:33:36,900 --> 00:33:41,700 was a stocking with an orange and a pencil set in it. 662 00:33:42,700 --> 00:33:45,700 And I'd run down to my mother and father's room... 663 00:33:47,700 --> 00:33:48,700 ..but... 664 00:33:48,700 --> 00:33:50,700 But what? 665 00:33:50,700 --> 00:33:53,700 MOBILE PHONE RINGS 666 00:33:53,700 --> 00:33:54,700 Excuse me. 667 00:33:55,700 --> 00:33:56,700 Yes. 668 00:33:58,700 --> 00:33:59,700 Right. 669 00:34:00,700 --> 00:34:02,700 Yes. 670 00:34:02,700 --> 00:34:04,700 Oh, I'm sorry, there's an emergency. I have to go. 671 00:34:04,700 --> 00:34:07,700 Janice is downstairs if you need anything. 672 00:34:07,700 --> 00:34:10,700 And we'll, erm... Er, we'll talk again. Well done. 673 00:34:10,700 --> 00:34:12,700 Off, shoo, downstairs! 674 00:34:12,700 --> 00:34:14,700 DOG BARKS, JAMES SIGHS 675 00:34:16,700 --> 00:34:18,700 OK, Agatha, I need you to remain still, yeah? 676 00:34:18,700 --> 00:34:20,700 Just try not to move. 677 00:34:20,700 --> 00:34:21,740 SHOUTING: Out of the way, coming through! 678 00:34:21,740 --> 00:34:25,540 You can probably hear somebody barking at people. That's the doc. 679 00:34:25,540 --> 00:34:27,700 Er, she's had a fall. She's got a cut on the back of her head. 680 00:34:27,700 --> 00:34:30,700 I've tried to stem the blood, but I think she's concussed. 681 00:34:30,700 --> 00:34:32,380 Well done. Anybody called an ambulance? 682 00:34:32,380 --> 00:34:33,700 On its way, Doc. 683 00:34:33,700 --> 00:34:35,900 Do you know where you are? Turkey. 684 00:34:35,900 --> 00:34:38,700 I think she means the bird, Doc, not the country. 685 00:34:38,700 --> 00:34:40,700 I won it from the food truck. 686 00:34:40,700 --> 00:34:42,380 Told you. Yes, shush. 687 00:34:42,380 --> 00:34:44,220 I never won anything before! 688 00:34:44,220 --> 00:34:45,700 Keep still and stop talking. 689 00:34:47,700 --> 00:34:50,700 Sorry, I hate to do this, but do we have the Parish go-ahead 690 00:34:50,700 --> 00:34:52,700 for the parade? 691 00:34:52,700 --> 00:34:55,060 Oh, Louisa, really? Not now, come on. Sorry. 692 00:34:55,060 --> 00:34:56,700 SHE MUTTERS 693 00:34:58,700 --> 00:35:00,700 What did that mean? 694 00:35:00,700 --> 00:35:02,700 I'm pretty sure it was a yes. 695 00:35:02,700 --> 00:35:04,700 You're just saying that cos you wanna be Santa Claus. 696 00:35:04,700 --> 00:35:09,700 Yes, I am. Because you're right, Louisa. 697 00:35:09,700 --> 00:35:11,700 We deserve this. All of us. 698 00:35:11,700 --> 00:35:15,700 Do you really wanna tell James that this has been cancelled as well? 699 00:35:15,700 --> 00:35:18,380 You're trying to emotionally manipulate me. 700 00:35:18,380 --> 00:35:21,060 Is it working? Might be, yeah. 701 00:35:21,060 --> 00:35:24,740 Because... technically, Agatha didn't say no... 702 00:35:24,740 --> 00:35:27,700 Everyone! The parade's still on. Joe, no, that's not what I meant... 703 00:35:27,700 --> 00:35:30,700 Right, let's get to work. Come on! OK, then. 704 00:35:32,380 --> 00:35:34,700 Mor, what are you doing? 705 00:35:34,700 --> 00:35:37,700 Oh, I-I thought I'd drive him to the butcher's myself. 706 00:35:37,700 --> 00:35:39,220 Well, I-I can do that. 707 00:35:39,220 --> 00:35:40,700 Yeah, erm... 708 00:35:40,700 --> 00:35:42,700 I know it's silly, but I... 709 00:35:42,700 --> 00:35:44,700 I just want a chance to say goodbye. 710 00:35:44,700 --> 00:35:47,700 What, to the...? 711 00:35:47,700 --> 00:35:49,700 Right, OK. I understand. 712 00:35:49,700 --> 00:35:52,700 But, I mean, it is a... It's a turkey at Christmas. 713 00:35:52,700 --> 00:35:53,700 Yeah, I know. 714 00:35:53,700 --> 00:35:55,700 Just take it easy. Rest up. 715 00:35:55,700 --> 00:35:57,700 Erm, avoid the bumpy roads. Keep it smooth. 716 00:35:57,700 --> 00:35:59,700 MOBILE PHONE RINGS Yes, Doc. 717 00:35:59,700 --> 00:36:01,700 We know how to drive an ambulance. 718 00:36:01,700 --> 00:36:03,380 Ellingham. 719 00:36:03,380 --> 00:36:07,700 Doc, it's Leonard Maitland. You left a message? 720 00:36:07,700 --> 00:36:09,740 Ah, Mr Maitland, yes. Your test results have come back. 721 00:36:09,740 --> 00:36:12,540 It's bad news, isn't it? 722 00:36:13,700 --> 00:36:16,700 To be honest, I've been having dizzy spells all day. 723 00:36:16,700 --> 00:36:18,700 It's made working in the garage really tricky. 724 00:36:18,700 --> 00:36:21,700 If you're feeling dizzy, you shouldn't be up and about. 725 00:36:21,700 --> 00:36:22,700 Yeah, all right... 726 00:36:24,540 --> 00:36:26,700 'I'll go and get a seat.' 727 00:36:29,700 --> 00:36:31,700 CLATTERING 728 00:36:31,700 --> 00:36:33,700 Oh, oh... 729 00:36:34,700 --> 00:36:35,700 Mr Maitland? What's happened? 730 00:36:35,700 --> 00:36:40,700 Just fell over and took the shelf down with me and... 731 00:36:40,700 --> 00:36:41,700 Oh, no. 732 00:36:47,700 --> 00:36:49,700 Doc, I don't wanna panic here, 733 00:36:49,700 --> 00:36:51,900 but there's a massive cut in my leg and a lot of blood. 734 00:36:54,900 --> 00:36:58,700 I'll just try and patch myself up. 735 00:36:58,700 --> 00:37:00,700 'Bleeding everywhere here.' 736 00:37:00,700 --> 00:37:02,700 Right, put pressure on the wound and keep the leg raised. 737 00:37:02,700 --> 00:37:03,700 I'll call an ambulance. 738 00:37:03,700 --> 00:37:05,700 Er, I'm sure it'll be fine. 739 00:37:05,700 --> 00:37:08,540 'Er, no. Your blood test showed that you're grossly anaemic. 740 00:37:08,540 --> 00:37:09,700 'You can't afford to lose any more blood.' 741 00:37:09,700 --> 00:37:12,700 It's not like as I could bleed to death, is it? 742 00:37:12,700 --> 00:37:15,740 Ah, well, in a worst-case scenario, er, yes. In a few hours. 743 00:37:15,740 --> 00:37:17,700 Then can you please get off the phone 744 00:37:17,700 --> 00:37:19,700 and call me a bloody ambulance! 745 00:37:19,700 --> 00:37:20,700 Yes! 746 00:37:20,700 --> 00:37:23,700 TURKEY CLUCKS 747 00:37:23,700 --> 00:37:26,700 I don't want you to go, but this is the only way. 748 00:37:29,700 --> 00:37:31,700 And I just wanna say thank you. 749 00:37:31,700 --> 00:37:34,700 I didn't think I was ready, but... 750 00:37:34,700 --> 00:37:37,220 I hadn't actually finished yet, Toby. 751 00:37:38,700 --> 00:37:41,700 It's fine. TURKEY CHATTERS 752 00:37:41,700 --> 00:37:42,900 Bye, then. 753 00:37:42,900 --> 00:37:44,700 TURKEY GOBBLES 754 00:37:48,700 --> 00:37:50,700 No, no fireworks. And no sky lanterns. 755 00:37:50,700 --> 00:37:53,700 Hang on a minute! I can get a really good deal on those. 756 00:37:53,700 --> 00:37:56,700 We don't wanna take anyone's attention away from the parade. 757 00:37:56,700 --> 00:37:58,700 Louisa, excuse me. Martin, I'm in a meeting. 758 00:37:59,700 --> 00:38:01,380 Yes, forgive me. 759 00:38:02,540 --> 00:38:03,700 Sorry. 760 00:38:03,700 --> 00:38:05,700 There's been an accident at Leonard Maitland's 761 00:38:05,700 --> 00:38:07,700 and the only ambulance in the area is tied up with, erm... 762 00:38:07,700 --> 00:38:10,700 er, whatshername, so I'm gonna have to drive up there myself. 763 00:38:10,700 --> 00:38:12,700 Oh, dear, that sounds serious. Yes, it is. 764 00:38:12,700 --> 00:38:14,700 Will you be back in time for the parade? 765 00:38:14,700 --> 00:38:16,700 Erm, yes, I should be. 766 00:38:16,700 --> 00:38:19,060 Er, but if I'm not... you'll tell James, will you? 767 00:38:19,060 --> 00:38:21,700 It'll be fine. He's fine. Just go. 768 00:38:38,700 --> 00:38:40,700 All OK with the butcher? 769 00:38:40,700 --> 00:38:43,700 You're not gonna believe me. Toby escaped. 770 00:38:43,700 --> 00:38:44,700 What? 771 00:38:44,700 --> 00:38:47,700 Yeah, so I got to the butcher and then he just sprung out the cage 772 00:38:47,700 --> 00:38:49,540 and flew away. 773 00:38:49,540 --> 00:38:51,700 You're right, I don't believe you. 774 00:38:51,700 --> 00:38:53,700 SCREAMING Is that Janice? 775 00:38:53,700 --> 00:38:55,700 God. 776 00:38:55,700 --> 00:38:56,700 Come on! 777 00:39:03,700 --> 00:39:04,700 What is it? 778 00:39:04,700 --> 00:39:06,900 Oh, that's really nice. 779 00:39:06,900 --> 00:39:08,540 Nice? 780 00:39:08,540 --> 00:39:10,700 Someone breaks in and leaves more birds for me 781 00:39:10,700 --> 00:39:12,700 after the last lot almost blinded me? 782 00:39:12,700 --> 00:39:15,700 It was a tiny scratch. On your hand. 783 00:39:15,700 --> 00:39:17,900 Maybe you should speak to Joe. 784 00:39:17,900 --> 00:39:20,700 I already have. But you know what the police are like. 785 00:39:20,700 --> 00:39:22,700 They've always got more important things to do. 786 00:39:22,700 --> 00:39:26,220 It's just that doves are a symbol, aren't they, of, er, of love? 787 00:39:26,220 --> 00:39:27,700 So? 788 00:39:27,700 --> 00:39:29,380 So maybe speak to Joe. 789 00:39:29,380 --> 00:39:32,540 Uh, I just told you, I already have. 790 00:39:32,540 --> 00:39:33,700 Is he feeling OK? 791 00:39:33,700 --> 00:39:34,900 SCREAMING 792 00:39:34,900 --> 00:39:37,700 PHONE RINGING OUT 793 00:39:41,380 --> 00:39:42,700 Mr Maitland? 794 00:39:44,700 --> 00:39:46,700 Can you hear me? 795 00:39:46,700 --> 00:39:47,900 Mr Maitland? 796 00:39:49,700 --> 00:39:52,700 If you can hear me, I'm almost with you. 797 00:39:52,700 --> 00:39:54,700 TURKEY CLUCKS 798 00:40:07,700 --> 00:40:10,700 TURKEY CHATTERS 799 00:40:15,700 --> 00:40:17,700 WIND WHISTLES 800 00:40:19,700 --> 00:40:21,700 HE GROANS 801 00:40:29,700 --> 00:40:31,540 HE MUTTERS 802 00:40:38,700 --> 00:40:41,700 RAGGED BREATHING, WIND WHISTLES 803 00:40:41,700 --> 00:40:44,700 ENGINE HISSES 804 00:40:46,700 --> 00:40:48,700 HE GROANS 805 00:41:11,060 --> 00:41:12,700 HE YELPS 806 00:41:12,700 --> 00:41:14,700 Argh! 807 00:41:22,544 --> 00:41:24,744 I was just coming to find you. How's your day been? 808 00:41:24,744 --> 00:41:26,544 Terrible. Really? 809 00:41:26,544 --> 00:41:28,544 What, nothing special happened or...? 810 00:41:28,544 --> 00:41:32,064 Oh, something special happened. That psycho struck again. 811 00:41:32,064 --> 00:41:33,584 He left two more scary birds in the salon. 812 00:41:33,584 --> 00:41:36,544 OK. What type of birds? 813 00:41:36,544 --> 00:41:38,544 I don't know, doves or something. 814 00:41:38,544 --> 00:41:40,544 Well, doves are nice. 815 00:41:40,544 --> 00:41:43,544 Doves, pigeons, rats, bats - they're all the same. 816 00:41:43,544 --> 00:41:45,544 When I find out who did this, they're dead. 817 00:41:45,544 --> 00:41:48,544 Well, maybe if you just think about it... 818 00:41:48,544 --> 00:41:50,544 I am thinking about it! I can't stop, it's driving me nuts. 819 00:41:50,544 --> 00:41:53,544 Look, if you can't be bothered to find out who's stalking me, 820 00:41:53,544 --> 00:41:55,544 then at least go and get rid of them! 821 00:41:55,544 --> 00:41:57,544 Yeah. I promise. I'll-I'll sort it out. 822 00:42:01,544 --> 00:42:05,544 Ho-ho-ho! What do you want for Christmas? 823 00:42:05,544 --> 00:42:07,544 How far away is Leonard Maitland's house? 824 00:42:07,544 --> 00:42:11,544 You do realise I'm Santa Claus, not the wonderful Joseph Penh... 825 00:42:11,544 --> 00:42:13,544 It's about 20 minutes. 826 00:42:13,544 --> 00:42:15,544 It's just Martin drove up there a few hours ago. 827 00:42:15,544 --> 00:42:17,544 He's still not back and I can't get a hold of him. 828 00:42:17,544 --> 00:42:20,544 Well, signal's terrible up there. The important thing... 829 00:42:20,544 --> 00:42:21,544 Is not to worry. Yes, I know. 830 00:42:21,544 --> 00:42:24,544 The important thing is that Leonard can't play Santa 831 00:42:24,544 --> 00:42:25,544 because that's my job now. 832 00:42:25,544 --> 00:42:29,544 And, yes, also not to worry. 833 00:42:29,544 --> 00:42:33,544 TURKEY CHATTERS, WIND WHISTLES 834 00:43:22,544 --> 00:43:27,544 ENGINE SPLUTTERS THEN CUTS OUT 835 00:43:30,544 --> 00:43:31,584 RAGGED BREATHING 836 00:43:31,584 --> 00:43:33,544 You always were a fragile child. 837 00:43:35,544 --> 00:43:38,544 I'm not one to be critical, but it was rather embarrassing. 838 00:43:39,544 --> 00:43:40,904 SHAKILY: Hypothermia. 839 00:43:40,904 --> 00:43:42,544 Hmm? 840 00:43:44,544 --> 00:43:47,224 Oh, I've been out in the cold for nearly two hours 841 00:43:47,224 --> 00:43:49,544 and my body temperature's dropped. 842 00:43:49,544 --> 00:43:50,544 And my pulse rate's decreased. 843 00:43:50,544 --> 00:43:53,544 And my pupils are dilated. 844 00:43:53,544 --> 00:43:56,544 My reflexes seem unaffected, though. 845 00:43:56,544 --> 00:43:58,544 Oh, for goodness' sake. 846 00:43:58,544 --> 00:44:00,544 Can't you even say hello? 847 00:44:00,544 --> 00:44:03,544 Erm.. You're not a person. You're a symptom. 848 00:44:03,544 --> 00:44:05,224 SHE SCOFFS 849 00:44:05,224 --> 00:44:06,904 That's a dreadful thing to say to your mother. 850 00:44:06,904 --> 00:44:11,544 Hypothermia can lead to disorientation and hallucinations. 851 00:44:11,544 --> 00:44:15,544 You always have an excuse for everything. It's rather tiresome. 852 00:44:15,544 --> 00:44:19,544 Right now, my primary concern is to get the engine started 853 00:44:19,544 --> 00:44:21,544 and the heat on again. 854 00:44:21,544 --> 00:44:24,544 And if you don't manage that? 855 00:44:24,544 --> 00:44:28,544 My core temperature could drop to a level 856 00:44:28,544 --> 00:44:31,544 where it's unable to produce sufficient heat, 857 00:44:31,544 --> 00:44:36,544 which ultimately would lead to my vital organs failing and then... 858 00:44:36,544 --> 00:44:37,744 Death? 859 00:44:39,544 --> 00:44:40,544 Yes. 860 00:44:40,544 --> 00:44:42,544 How long do you have? 861 00:44:43,744 --> 00:44:45,544 About an hour. 862 00:44:46,584 --> 00:44:48,544 Maybe less. 863 00:44:49,544 --> 00:44:50,544 That's not helpful. 864 00:44:50,544 --> 00:44:54,544 Oh, Martin! What makes you think I'm here to help? 865 00:44:54,544 --> 00:44:56,544 WIND WHISTLES 866 00:45:04,064 --> 00:45:07,544 Do you think he'll be upset if you don't make it home? 867 00:45:07,544 --> 00:45:08,544 Who? 868 00:45:08,544 --> 00:45:10,544 James. 869 00:45:10,544 --> 00:45:12,544 I will make it back. 870 00:45:12,544 --> 00:45:14,904 You don't seem that upset about my passing. 871 00:45:14,904 --> 00:45:18,544 And it's not as if you're a better parent to James. 872 00:45:18,544 --> 00:45:19,544 That's not true. 873 00:45:19,544 --> 00:45:23,544 He's already begun to resent you, Martin. 874 00:45:23,544 --> 00:45:25,544 That's a disease that spreads. 875 00:45:25,544 --> 00:45:28,544 One that I doubt even you know how to cure. 876 00:45:30,544 --> 00:45:33,544 How old were you when you realised we didn't love you? 877 00:45:35,544 --> 00:45:37,544 Look what Santa brought. 878 00:45:37,544 --> 00:45:40,224 'Was it on one of those Christmas Day mornings, 879 00:45:40,224 --> 00:45:43,224 'when you woke up and found us gone? 880 00:45:44,544 --> 00:45:46,544 'You can't blame us, Martin. 881 00:45:47,584 --> 00:45:51,544 'We were happy before you arrived.' 882 00:45:51,544 --> 00:45:52,544 Hello? 883 00:45:54,584 --> 00:45:57,544 We just wanted to enjoy one special day a year, 884 00:45:57,544 --> 00:46:00,544 when we could be free from you. 885 00:46:00,544 --> 00:46:03,064 Be quiet. You're not real. 886 00:46:03,064 --> 00:46:06,544 Which, on the balance of things, is even more disturbing, isn't it? 887 00:46:06,544 --> 00:46:08,544 ENGINE STARTS 888 00:46:09,584 --> 00:46:11,544 What a clever boy. 889 00:46:11,544 --> 00:46:12,744 CAR BEEPS, ENGINE STOPS 890 00:46:14,544 --> 00:46:15,544 Well, maybe not. 891 00:46:18,544 --> 00:46:20,544 What are you doing? 892 00:46:20,544 --> 00:46:23,904 My patient is anaemic. I have to make sure that he's safe. 893 00:46:23,904 --> 00:46:27,544 You can't go out there. You've already tried and failed. 894 00:46:27,544 --> 00:46:28,584 Then I'll try again. 895 00:46:28,584 --> 00:46:30,544 And you'll freeze to death. 896 00:46:30,544 --> 00:46:34,544 Now, sit back here and listen with Mother. 897 00:46:34,544 --> 00:46:37,544 Just for the record... I forgive you. 898 00:46:37,544 --> 00:46:40,384 No, you don't. Oh, shut up! 899 00:46:56,544 --> 00:46:58,544 You ready to go to the parade? 900 00:46:58,544 --> 00:46:59,584 Just fixing my beard. 901 00:46:59,584 --> 00:47:01,544 HE CHUCKLES 902 00:47:02,584 --> 00:47:04,544 Do I look OK? 903 00:47:04,544 --> 00:47:06,544 I don't know. I suppose so. 904 00:47:06,544 --> 00:47:09,224 I'm sorry. It's this whole stalker thing. 905 00:47:09,224 --> 00:47:10,544 It's got me all anxious. 906 00:47:10,544 --> 00:47:12,544 It's over, Janice. 907 00:47:12,544 --> 00:47:14,544 You just have to trust me. 908 00:47:14,544 --> 00:47:16,544 It's all over. 909 00:47:19,544 --> 00:47:22,584 Right, I couldn't get you a partridge. 910 00:47:22,584 --> 00:47:25,544 What I have got you is a pheasant, which is basically 911 00:47:25,544 --> 00:47:27,544 the Rolls Royce of partridges. 912 00:47:28,744 --> 00:47:30,544 Did you not get my message? 913 00:47:30,544 --> 00:47:33,544 Yeah. No more birds to the salon. So I've, er, brought it here. 914 00:47:33,544 --> 00:47:35,544 Just "no more birds". 915 00:47:35,544 --> 00:47:38,544 Well, you've paid for them and you're not getting your money back. 916 00:47:41,544 --> 00:47:43,544 Oh, my God. 917 00:47:43,544 --> 00:47:44,544 You're my stalker. 918 00:47:46,544 --> 00:47:49,544 What's wrong with you? Why would you want to torture me like this? 919 00:47:49,544 --> 00:47:50,904 It was meant to be romantic. 920 00:47:50,904 --> 00:47:53,544 What's romantic about being attacked by chickens? 921 00:47:53,544 --> 00:47:55,544 Not chickens. Hens. 922 00:47:55,544 --> 00:47:59,544 Three Cornish hens because no-one had any French ones. 923 00:47:59,544 --> 00:48:03,224 And then two doves and then a pheasant. 924 00:48:03,224 --> 00:48:06,544 Because, apparently, they're the Rolls Royce of partridges. 925 00:48:07,544 --> 00:48:10,544 You know, like the song. 926 00:48:11,544 --> 00:48:13,544 Well, then, why didn't you just tell me, then? 927 00:48:15,064 --> 00:48:17,544 Because you were upset and... 928 00:48:19,544 --> 00:48:22,544 ..I didn't want to spoil this... 929 00:48:24,224 --> 00:48:25,544 ..this moment. 930 00:48:28,544 --> 00:48:30,544 Oh. 931 00:48:30,544 --> 00:48:35,544 I know we've tried and failed before, Janice, but... 932 00:48:37,544 --> 00:48:38,544 ..I love you. 933 00:48:42,544 --> 00:48:43,744 Joe, I can't. 934 00:48:45,544 --> 00:48:47,544 Oh. OK. 935 00:48:47,544 --> 00:48:50,544 OK. That's fine. 936 00:48:50,544 --> 00:48:53,544 I mean the beard. It has to go. 937 00:48:57,544 --> 00:48:58,584 So...? 938 00:48:58,584 --> 00:49:00,384 Yes! 939 00:49:05,544 --> 00:49:07,544 MOBILE PHONE RINGS 940 00:49:09,224 --> 00:49:10,544 Hello? 941 00:49:10,544 --> 00:49:13,544 Martin, thank goodness. I was so worried. 942 00:49:13,544 --> 00:49:15,544 BREATHLESSLY: 'I crashed the car.' 943 00:49:15,544 --> 00:49:16,544 Oh, my God. Are you OK? 944 00:49:16,544 --> 00:49:18,544 Er, wait a minute. 945 00:49:18,544 --> 00:49:21,544 Hello? 'I'm here, Martin.' 946 00:49:21,544 --> 00:49:23,544 I think I have hypothermia. 947 00:49:23,544 --> 00:49:25,544 My, er... my mother... 948 00:49:25,544 --> 00:49:27,544 Oh, Martin, I know. I'm so sorry. 949 00:49:27,544 --> 00:49:29,544 No, she came to visit me. 950 00:49:30,544 --> 00:49:32,544 What? What do you mean? Like, as a ghost? 951 00:49:32,544 --> 00:49:36,544 No, it was a symptom of hypothermia. 952 00:49:36,544 --> 00:49:37,544 She said... 953 00:49:37,544 --> 00:49:39,544 She said I was losing James. 954 00:49:39,544 --> 00:49:41,544 She wasn't real, though. 955 00:49:41,544 --> 00:49:45,544 I know. But it doesn't mean she wasn't right, though, does it? 956 00:49:45,544 --> 00:49:47,544 Martin, where are you now? 957 00:49:48,544 --> 00:49:51,584 Well, the car wouldn't start and my mother was being annoying, 958 00:49:51,584 --> 00:49:53,584 so I was trying to find Leonard Maitland's house, 959 00:49:53,584 --> 00:49:55,544 but I think I'm lost. 960 00:49:55,544 --> 00:49:59,544 OK. You need to go back to the car, yeah, and I'll come and find you. 961 00:49:59,544 --> 00:50:01,544 I'm not entirely sure where I am... 962 00:50:01,544 --> 00:50:04,544 and I-I don't know where the car is. 963 00:50:05,544 --> 00:50:08,544 'Martin? Martin, I can't hear you.' 964 00:50:08,544 --> 00:50:10,544 I can see light. 965 00:50:10,544 --> 00:50:14,384 No, no, no, that doesn't sound good. Don't go into the light, Martin. 966 00:50:14,384 --> 00:50:16,544 I think it's Leonard Maitland's house. 967 00:50:16,544 --> 00:50:18,544 All right, in that case, definitely go towards it 968 00:50:18,544 --> 00:50:20,544 and I'll come collect you now. 969 00:50:20,544 --> 00:50:22,544 No. He needs urgent medical attention. 970 00:50:22,544 --> 00:50:23,904 That's why I'm here. 971 00:50:23,904 --> 00:50:26,544 Martin, you were just in a crash and you said you had hypothermia. 972 00:50:26,544 --> 00:50:29,384 I just need to warm up. 973 00:50:29,384 --> 00:50:30,544 I'll be fine. 974 00:50:30,544 --> 00:50:32,544 Really, you're sure? 975 00:50:32,544 --> 00:50:35,544 Yeah. You can come and get me after the parade. 976 00:50:35,544 --> 00:50:37,544 'Right, just, please, just stay in touch.' 977 00:50:37,544 --> 00:50:39,544 DISCONNECTED TONE 978 00:51:02,000 --> 00:51:03,520 Hold on! 979 00:51:07,000 --> 00:51:10,000 Bloody hell, what happened to you? Come in. 980 00:51:10,000 --> 00:51:12,000 You shouldn't be walking around. 981 00:51:12,000 --> 00:51:14,000 I had to answer the door, didn't I? 982 00:51:19,000 --> 00:51:21,000 Lie down there and elevate your leg. 983 00:51:27,360 --> 00:51:29,000 You look awful, Doc. 984 00:51:30,680 --> 00:51:33,000 My car came off the road. 985 00:51:33,000 --> 00:51:34,680 I just need to warm up for a bit. 986 00:51:36,000 --> 00:51:38,000 I would make you a hot drink, but... 987 00:51:38,000 --> 00:51:40,000 feel free to help yourself. 988 00:51:40,000 --> 00:51:41,840 Thank you. 989 00:51:43,000 --> 00:51:46,000 I'm a bit worried about your blood loss, though. 990 00:51:46,000 --> 00:51:48,000 Let me take your pulse. 991 00:51:52,000 --> 00:51:55,000 Yeah, you don't have a radial pulse. 992 00:51:55,000 --> 00:51:57,000 I'll set up a drip and get some fluids into you, 993 00:51:57,000 --> 00:51:59,520 but first I'll have a look at that wound. 994 00:51:59,520 --> 00:52:02,040 Sorry to drag you up here, Doc. 995 00:52:02,040 --> 00:52:06,000 It's Christmas Eve. You should be with your family. 996 00:52:06,000 --> 00:52:07,000 Stop talking. 997 00:52:11,360 --> 00:52:13,000 HE RETCHES 998 00:52:13,000 --> 00:52:15,000 It's bad, right? 999 00:52:16,040 --> 00:52:19,000 Yes, you've, er, torn a varicose vein. 1000 00:52:19,000 --> 00:52:21,000 That's why you're bleeding so much. 1001 00:52:23,000 --> 00:52:24,000 HE GASPS 1002 00:52:27,000 --> 00:52:30,000 Well, yeah, luckily, he's OK, but it could've been a lot worse. 1003 00:52:30,000 --> 00:52:32,000 Well, that's a relief. 1004 00:52:32,000 --> 00:52:35,000 And don't worry about Mary. I'm more than happy 1005 00:52:35,000 --> 00:52:37,000 to look after her while you're at the parade. 1006 00:52:37,000 --> 00:52:39,000 Oh, that's wonderful. 1007 00:52:39,000 --> 00:52:42,000 Oh, hello. I didn't realise you were here. 1008 00:52:42,000 --> 00:52:44,000 Sal dropped in for some of my eggnog. 1009 00:52:44,000 --> 00:52:47,000 I don't know if the doctor told you? He did. 1010 00:52:47,000 --> 00:52:49,000 Oh. 1011 00:52:49,000 --> 00:52:51,000 Sorry. 1012 00:52:51,000 --> 00:52:53,000 Why, what happened? 1013 00:52:53,000 --> 00:52:55,000 Oh, it's nothing. Thank you, Ruth. 1014 00:52:55,000 --> 00:52:57,000 Come on, James. It's almost time. 1015 00:52:57,000 --> 00:52:59,200 I'm going to see Santa. 1016 00:52:59,200 --> 00:53:02,000 Well, tell him I said hello. 1017 00:53:02,000 --> 00:53:03,360 Bye. 1018 00:53:08,000 --> 00:53:09,000 I don't want to pry... 1019 00:53:09,000 --> 00:53:13,000 I may have accidentally tried to kiss the doctor earlier. 1020 00:53:13,000 --> 00:53:14,360 Oh, Sally. 1021 00:53:14,360 --> 00:53:16,360 Well, there was mistletoe. 1022 00:53:16,360 --> 00:53:18,000 And he'd just helped me. 1023 00:53:18,000 --> 00:53:22,840 I had what I thought was a malignant lump in my throat 1024 00:53:22,840 --> 00:53:27,680 and it turned out to be gastroesophageal reflux disease. 1025 00:53:27,680 --> 00:53:31,360 Well, usually, a handshake or "thank you very much" will do. 1026 00:53:31,360 --> 00:53:33,000 And he also... 1027 00:53:33,000 --> 00:53:36,000 He said that my prolapsed disc was healed 1028 00:53:36,000 --> 00:53:38,520 and I don't need to wear my neck brace any more. 1029 00:53:38,520 --> 00:53:41,000 But I don't know. I just... 1030 00:53:41,000 --> 00:53:43,200 I can't seem to take it off. 1031 00:53:43,200 --> 00:53:46,000 Would you like me to do it? 1032 00:53:52,680 --> 00:53:54,000 Sorry. 1033 00:53:54,000 --> 00:53:55,000 Oh, er... 1034 00:53:55,000 --> 00:53:57,000 Oh-oh-oh, sorry... 1035 00:53:57,000 --> 00:54:00,000 I-I know it's stupid and it's sentimental, 1036 00:54:00,000 --> 00:54:02,000 but, erm... 1037 00:54:04,000 --> 00:54:05,680 ..I will miss it. 1038 00:54:07,000 --> 00:54:10,000 It's a permanent symbol of a medical condition, 1039 00:54:10,000 --> 00:54:14,000 which means it's also a permanent link to a certain doctor 1040 00:54:14,000 --> 00:54:16,040 you may have feelings for. 1041 00:54:18,000 --> 00:54:20,000 It's not the neck brace you're giving up... 1042 00:54:21,000 --> 00:54:23,000 ..it's Martin. 1043 00:54:35,000 --> 00:54:36,000 Do it. 1044 00:54:38,000 --> 00:54:40,000 Good girl. Yeah. 1045 00:54:40,000 --> 00:54:43,000 I, no-no... Stay still. 1046 00:54:43,000 --> 00:54:45,000 I-I-I... Oh, oh... There. 1047 00:55:03,000 --> 00:55:07,000 You're right, it's time. 1048 00:55:09,000 --> 00:55:10,000 Yeah. 1049 00:55:18,000 --> 00:55:20,000 So, you need to rest up. 1050 00:55:20,000 --> 00:55:24,000 No strenuous activity for at least two weeks. 1051 00:55:24,000 --> 00:55:26,000 No more Santa, then. No. 1052 00:55:28,000 --> 00:55:31,000 Have you worked out what this rash is yet? 1053 00:55:31,000 --> 00:55:33,000 Er, no, I haven't had the results back from your biopsy, 1054 00:55:33,000 --> 00:55:36,000 but I'm fairly certain that it's dermatitis herpetiformis. 1055 00:55:36,000 --> 00:55:39,000 Is it catching? No. 1056 00:55:39,000 --> 00:55:41,360 So there was no need to close the grotto down. 1057 00:55:41,360 --> 00:55:44,000 No, no, precautions were necessary. 1058 00:55:44,000 --> 00:55:47,000 Anyway, I think it was just a symptom of something bigger. 1059 00:55:47,000 --> 00:55:50,000 All indicators point towards coeliac disease, 1060 00:55:50,000 --> 00:55:52,840 which is a condition where your immune system 1061 00:55:52,840 --> 00:55:56,000 starts to attack your own tissue when you eat gluten. 1062 00:55:56,000 --> 00:56:00,000 It would certainly explain your low blood iron 1063 00:56:00,000 --> 00:56:02,520 and your stomach issues and your weight loss. 1064 00:56:02,520 --> 00:56:05,200 And your stronger than normal reaction to wheat-based alcohol. 1065 00:56:05,200 --> 00:56:09,000 My body's attacking itself? Bloody heck, that sounds serious. 1066 00:56:09,000 --> 00:56:11,520 Yeah, it is. Yeah. Yeah. Unless you change your diet, 1067 00:56:11,520 --> 00:56:14,000 you run the risk of malabsorption and malnutrition. 1068 00:56:14,000 --> 00:56:16,040 It can be very serious. I'll run some tests. 1069 00:56:16,040 --> 00:56:18,000 Urgent tests? 1070 00:56:18,000 --> 00:56:19,360 Not this minute, no. 1071 00:56:19,360 --> 00:56:22,000 Great, so I can drive you back to the village now, 1072 00:56:22,000 --> 00:56:24,000 seeing as I'm not contagious. 1073 00:56:24,000 --> 00:56:25,000 Ah, no, that won't be necessary. 1074 00:56:25,000 --> 00:56:27,000 Louisa's coming to collect me after the parade. 1075 00:56:27,000 --> 00:56:29,000 After the parade? 1076 00:56:29,000 --> 00:56:31,520 Doc, it's Christmas Eve. 1077 00:56:31,520 --> 00:56:34,000 I'm more than grateful, you risking yourself, 1078 00:56:34,000 --> 00:56:37,000 coming up here and stitching me up, but you should be with your family. 1079 00:56:37,000 --> 00:56:40,000 Yes, now I appreciate that, but I need to be thorough. 1080 00:56:42,840 --> 00:56:44,000 Doc... 1081 00:56:44,000 --> 00:56:46,000 I hate Christmas. I always have. 1082 00:56:46,000 --> 00:56:48,840 What do you mean? 1083 00:56:48,840 --> 00:56:51,000 See, my wife loved it. 1084 00:56:51,000 --> 00:56:53,000 I was only ever Santa to please her. 1085 00:56:53,000 --> 00:56:56,000 And to be honest, I still couldn't stand it. 1086 00:56:56,000 --> 00:56:59,000 I'd moan, complain, you know how it is. 1087 00:57:00,680 --> 00:57:06,000 Then, five years ago, she died. December the 23rd, without warning. 1088 00:57:06,000 --> 00:57:09,000 Yes, I remember, it was very sad. 1089 00:57:09,000 --> 00:57:12,040 After that, putting on the beard, the suit, 1090 00:57:12,040 --> 00:57:15,000 becoming someone else for a while, well, it was an escape. 1091 00:57:18,000 --> 00:57:22,000 And once I stopped fighting it, I started to get it. 1092 00:57:22,000 --> 00:57:26,000 Making toys for the kids, giving folk some happy memories... 1093 00:57:26,000 --> 00:57:31,000 it's... it's a privilege, Doc. An honour. 1094 00:57:31,000 --> 00:57:34,000 I just wish I'd understood that when she was still alive. 1095 00:57:36,840 --> 00:57:41,000 Yes, well, erm... I'm sorry, you'll have to wait until next year now. 1096 00:57:41,000 --> 00:57:43,000 And is that your plan? 1097 00:57:43,000 --> 00:57:45,000 Wait until next year 1098 00:57:45,000 --> 00:57:48,000 and MAYBE celebrate Christmas with your family then? 1099 00:57:48,000 --> 00:57:50,000 I had an emergency to attend to. 1100 00:57:50,000 --> 00:57:52,000 And now the emergency's over. 1101 00:57:52,000 --> 00:57:53,000 Er, yeah, well, even if I... 1102 00:57:53,000 --> 00:57:56,000 Even if I... I mean, it's just... It'll be just too late now. 1103 00:57:56,000 --> 00:57:57,680 It wouldn't be too late if you left right now. 1104 00:57:57,680 --> 00:57:59,840 I still have to run those tests on you. 1105 00:57:59,840 --> 00:58:01,000 The tests can wait. 1106 00:58:04,000 --> 00:58:05,200 You're avoiding your family 1107 00:58:05,200 --> 00:58:08,000 because you don't want to ruin things for them. 1108 00:58:12,000 --> 00:58:15,000 Do you wanna know what the true magic of Christmas is? 1109 00:58:15,000 --> 00:58:16,520 It's being exactly who you are, 1110 00:58:16,520 --> 00:58:19,000 but, still, your family want you around, 1111 00:58:19,000 --> 00:58:21,000 even if you are an irritating bugger. 1112 00:58:22,840 --> 00:58:24,200 That truly is a miracle. 1113 00:58:26,000 --> 00:58:29,000 And sometimes we don't know how lucky we are until it's too late. 1114 00:58:33,000 --> 00:58:37,000 The only way you can ruin their Christmas is by not being there. 1115 00:58:39,000 --> 00:58:42,000 Yes, I see what you mean. 1116 00:58:42,000 --> 00:58:44,000 Great. Now, it's gonna be cold out there, 1117 00:58:44,000 --> 00:58:46,000 so we'll need to wrap up. 1118 00:58:46,000 --> 00:58:48,000 You're not coming. You need to recuperate and rest that leg. 1119 00:58:48,000 --> 00:58:50,200 Doc, it's Christmas Eve. I have plans. 1120 00:58:50,200 --> 00:58:53,000 Absolutely not. I'm the one with the wheels. 1121 00:58:53,000 --> 00:58:56,000 Either we go together, or we don't go at all. 1122 00:59:08,000 --> 00:59:10,000 Here we go. I've got some spares. 1123 00:59:11,000 --> 00:59:13,000 As I was saying, it'll be cold, 1124 00:59:13,000 --> 00:59:15,000 on account of there being no windscreen. 1125 00:59:15,000 --> 00:59:16,000 What? 1126 00:59:17,000 --> 00:59:20,000 Maybe better I just show you, Doc. 1127 00:59:26,000 --> 00:59:27,000 Really?! 1128 00:59:27,000 --> 00:59:31,000 Mind out, it's Santa coming through. It's Santa coming through. 1129 00:59:31,000 --> 00:59:33,000 Attention, please. 1130 00:59:33,000 --> 00:59:37,000 Attention, everyone. The parade is about to begin. 1131 00:59:37,000 --> 00:59:38,200 CHEERING 1132 00:59:38,200 --> 00:59:42,000 But before we begin, I'd like to make a little speech. 1133 00:59:42,000 --> 00:59:43,000 This is boring! I'm cold. 1134 00:59:43,000 --> 00:59:44,840 Ten years ago... 1135 00:59:44,840 --> 00:59:47,000 Santa? Maybe we could just, you know, begin? 1136 00:59:47,000 --> 00:59:50,000 Well, we'll begin when Santa says so. 1137 00:59:50,000 --> 00:59:53,000 All those in favour of starting the parade, say aye! 1138 00:59:53,000 --> 00:59:54,520 ALL: AYE! 1139 00:59:54,520 --> 00:59:57,000 OK, everybody behind me, stay in formation! 1140 00:59:57,000 --> 00:59:59,000 What about Daddy? 1141 00:59:59,000 --> 01:00:02,000 Yeah, he said he really wanted to be here, but... 1142 01:00:02,000 --> 01:00:06,000 Don't worry about Daddy, little man. Santa's here now. 1143 01:00:06,000 --> 01:00:10,000 Ho-ho-ho! Merry Christmas! 1144 01:00:10,000 --> 01:00:14,000 Merry Christmas, everyone! 1145 01:00:14,000 --> 01:00:16,000 Ho-ho-ho! What the...? 1146 01:00:16,000 --> 01:00:19,000 Sit down! Your leg! You'll burst the stitches. 1147 01:00:19,000 --> 01:00:21,000 Keep your eyes on the road. 1148 01:00:21,000 --> 01:00:26,000 Merry Christmas, everybody! 1149 01:00:26,000 --> 01:00:29,000 Presents for everyone! Martin?! 1150 01:00:29,000 --> 01:00:30,840 Hello. 1151 01:00:30,840 --> 01:00:35,000 Merry Christmas! Ho-ho-ho! 1152 01:00:35,000 --> 01:00:37,000 Merry Christmas! Put your seatbelt on. 1153 01:00:37,000 --> 01:00:40,000 Come on, Doc! All right. 1154 01:00:40,000 --> 01:00:44,000 CHEERING 1155 01:00:44,000 --> 01:00:47,000 All together now! Ho-ho-ho! 1156 01:00:47,000 --> 01:00:49,000 PARADERS: Jingle all the way 1157 01:00:49,000 --> 01:00:54,000 Oh, what fun it is to ride In a one-horse open sleigh, hey! 1158 01:00:54,000 --> 01:00:58,000 Jingle bells, jingle bells Jingle all the way 1159 01:00:58,000 --> 01:01:01,000 Oh, what fun it is to ride In a one-horse... 1160 01:01:01,000 --> 01:01:04,000 Told you I'd show you the magic of Christmas, didn't I? 1161 01:01:04,000 --> 01:01:08,000 Er, yes. Yes, you did, yes. But take it easy. Stay here. 1162 01:01:08,000 --> 01:01:09,360 Best seat in the house, Doc. Yeah. 1163 01:01:09,360 --> 01:01:12,000 Mummy! Did you enjoy that? Did you? 1164 01:01:13,000 --> 01:01:17,000 Well, that was quite an entrance. I wanted to be here on time. 1165 01:01:17,000 --> 01:01:19,000 Daddy! 1166 01:01:23,000 --> 01:01:25,000 Did you enjoy that? Yes! 1167 01:01:30,000 --> 01:01:32,000 There we go, my love, you take care now. 1168 01:01:32,000 --> 01:01:34,000 I thought I said no sky lanterns. 1169 01:01:34,000 --> 01:01:37,000 During the parade, yes. But the parade's over now. 1170 01:01:37,000 --> 01:01:40,000 Oh, come on. It's Christmas, everybody's enjoying themselves. 1171 01:01:40,000 --> 01:01:41,000 No means no! 1172 01:01:41,000 --> 01:01:44,000 You know what, you're a great Santa. 1173 01:01:46,000 --> 01:01:48,000 Really? Best we've ever had. 1174 01:01:49,000 --> 01:01:52,000 Well, I suppose you have already given them out, haven't you? 1175 01:01:52,000 --> 01:01:55,000 So... Here, go on. On the house. 1176 01:01:55,000 --> 01:01:58,000 Thanks. Merry Christmas, Bert. 1177 01:01:58,000 --> 01:02:00,000 And Merry Christmas to you, too. 1178 01:02:01,000 --> 01:02:06,000 OK. I believe you. The turkey escaped. 1179 01:02:06,000 --> 01:02:09,000 I let it go. Oh, I knew it, Mor. I knew it. 1180 01:02:09,000 --> 01:02:11,000 I'm sorry. 1181 01:02:11,000 --> 01:02:15,000 I think I was just feeling a bit broody and hormonal. 1182 01:02:15,000 --> 01:02:17,000 Right, yeah. 1183 01:02:17,000 --> 01:02:20,000 You know, because of the baby. 1184 01:02:22,000 --> 01:02:24,000 What, the... the baby turkey? 1185 01:02:25,040 --> 01:02:28,000 No. What, er...? 1186 01:02:33,000 --> 01:02:37,000 I was gonna wait till Christmas Day to tell you, but, erm... 1187 01:02:37,000 --> 01:02:38,520 surprise! 1188 01:02:40,000 --> 01:02:41,000 Baby. 1189 01:02:41,000 --> 01:02:43,000 Yeah, a baby... What? 1190 01:02:43,000 --> 01:02:46,000 Our baby. Oh, Mor! Mor! 1191 01:02:49,000 --> 01:02:51,000 We're getting married. Again. 1192 01:02:51,000 --> 01:02:53,520 Congratulations, again! Can I tell 'em? 1193 01:02:55,000 --> 01:02:58,000 We're having a baby! Oh, it's not a competition, Al. 1194 01:02:58,000 --> 01:03:01,000 Well... Congratulations! 1195 01:03:04,000 --> 01:03:06,520 Here, take this. 1196 01:03:09,000 --> 01:03:11,000 You know, some people, when they light these lanterns, 1197 01:03:11,000 --> 01:03:13,000 they like to dedicate them to people. 1198 01:03:13,000 --> 01:03:17,360 Absent friends or family... or maybe someone they've lost. 1199 01:03:19,000 --> 01:03:22,000 I'm not sure if my mother would appreciate a lantern. 1200 01:03:23,000 --> 01:03:25,000 It's not for her, Martin. 1201 01:03:45,000 --> 01:03:46,000 Thank you. 1202 01:03:50,000 --> 01:03:51,000 I love you. 1203 01:03:52,000 --> 01:03:54,000 I love you, too, Martin. 1204 01:04:00,000 --> 01:04:02,000 Hang on! 1205 01:04:02,000 --> 01:04:04,000 That one, where's it going? 1206 01:04:04,000 --> 01:04:06,000 Is that your lantern burning up? 1207 01:04:08,000 --> 01:04:11,000 Yeah, it looks like it's falling. 1208 01:04:11,000 --> 01:04:15,000 As long as the wind doesn't catch it and it lands in the sea. 1209 01:04:17,000 --> 01:04:19,000 I think it's coming this way. 1210 01:04:24,200 --> 01:04:27,000 Oh, that's bad. Oh, dear. 1211 01:04:28,000 --> 01:04:31,000 Erm, sorry. Sorry, everybody, but I, er... 1212 01:04:31,000 --> 01:04:33,000 James! 1213 01:04:33,000 --> 01:04:36,000 Martin! James! James, come here. 1214 01:04:38,000 --> 01:04:40,840 Where's Penhale? Penhale, call the fire brigade! 1215 01:04:40,840 --> 01:04:43,000 Everybody, stand back. Stand back! 1216 01:04:47,680 --> 01:04:49,840 Subtitles by accessibility@itv.com 1217 01:04:50,345 --> 01:05:50,643 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org 1218 01:05:50,693 --> 01:05:55,243 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 91239