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1
00:00:07,120 --> 00:00:10,190
'Stand by, two. Mix through
and cue on two.'
2
00:00:10,240 --> 00:00:12,110
'The BBC has announced
the appointment
3
00:00:12,160 --> 00:00:14,270
'of ex-head of Olympic
Delivery Ian Fletcher
4
00:00:14,320 --> 00:00:16,460
'as its new Head of Values.'
5
00:00:22,120 --> 00:00:24,590
'Time now for the shipping forecast.'
6
00:00:26,280 --> 00:00:28,150
'Superimposed.'
7
00:00:41,240 --> 00:00:44,470
'It's Tuesday, another
in a long line of Tuesdays
8
00:00:44,520 --> 00:00:48,480
'at the BBC's New Broadcasting House
headquarters in central London.'
9
00:00:59,000 --> 00:01:01,230
~ Morning.
~ Yes, hi.
10
00:01:01,280 --> 00:01:03,630
~ The man with the Values.
~ Hi, how are you, Simon?
11
00:01:03,680 --> 00:01:05,750
Oh, bearing up. Bearing up.
12
00:01:07,160 --> 00:01:09,630
~ Good. Actually, whilst
I've got you, Simon...
~ Brilliant.
13
00:01:09,680 --> 00:01:11,270
.. I see tomorrow's the closing date.
14
00:01:11,320 --> 00:01:13,790
~ Sorry. Sorry, Ian. Can I
just, is that a titanium one?
~ What?
15
00:01:13,840 --> 00:01:15,710
No, this is just, you
know, it's a normal one.
16
00:01:15,760 --> 00:01:18,230
~ Yes, no, brilliant.
~ So, I was going to ask Tony...
17
00:01:18,280 --> 00:01:20,270
Can I just, I mean,
can I have a quick...
18
00:01:20,320 --> 00:01:23,310
~ Well, I mean...
~ Would you mind?
~ Right.
19
00:01:23,360 --> 00:01:26,070
~ Yes, I'm not sure the extra
four hundred quid's worth it.
~ Right.
20
00:01:26,120 --> 00:01:28,150
So, that's titanium?
21
00:01:28,200 --> 00:01:30,550
Supposed to be. I'm not sure
you can tell the difference.
22
00:01:30,600 --> 00:01:31,950
~ I feel a bit of a mug.
~ Right. Yes.
23
00:01:32,000 --> 00:01:33,790
~ So, anyway, whilst I've got you...
~ Yes.
24
00:01:33,840 --> 00:01:36,750
'Tomorrow is the closing date
for applications for the new
25
00:01:36,800 --> 00:01:39,190
'and highly senior Director
of Better post.'
26
00:01:39,240 --> 00:01:41,630
I mean, I wasn't consulted
about any of this originally.
27
00:01:41,680 --> 00:01:42,670
No, I know, honestly...
28
00:01:42,720 --> 00:01:45,390
~ .. and I still think it's a ludicrous title.
~ Yes, no, brilliant.
29
00:01:45,440 --> 00:01:46,910
But since it seems to be happening -
30
00:01:46,960 --> 00:01:49,510
~ this is something I'm going
to mention to Tony...
~ Jolly good.
31
00:01:49,560 --> 00:01:52,430
.. when it comes to the interview,
it would be an appropriate thing -
32
00:01:52,480 --> 00:01:54,910
actually a healthy thing -
for Values to be represented.
33
00:01:54,960 --> 00:01:57,750
~ Yes, no, brilliant.
~ As I say, this is something
I'm flagging up now,
34
00:01:57,800 --> 00:02:00,270
but it is something I'm going
to be mentioning to Tony.
35
00:02:00,320 --> 00:02:03,190
~ No, very good, Ian. Very brave.
~ Well, no, it's just... Brave?
36
00:02:03,240 --> 00:02:05,030
'Despite his wisdom and experience
37
00:02:05,080 --> 00:02:07,510
'as the BBC's Director
of Strategic Governance,
38
00:02:07,560 --> 00:02:10,270
'Simon Harwood is still not sure
whether the laws of management
39
00:02:10,320 --> 00:02:12,990
'allow the Head of Values to
sit on the interviewing panel
40
00:02:13,040 --> 00:02:14,630
'for a new Director level post.'
41
00:02:14,680 --> 00:02:16,590
Maybe if someone had told
me this to begin with
42
00:02:16,640 --> 00:02:18,950
~ I might have applied for it myself.
~ Yes, no. Very good.
43
00:02:19,000 --> 00:02:21,350
~ I'm serious.
~ Yes, no. I'd like to see Tony's face.
~ What?
44
00:02:21,400 --> 00:02:23,670
Well, the idea of his own
creation - Captain Values -
45
00:02:23,720 --> 00:02:26,110
taking his hand off the controls
to apply for another job -
46
00:02:26,160 --> 00:02:27,390
he'd practically have a fit.
47
00:02:27,440 --> 00:02:29,590
Oh, great. So, I'm too important
to apply for the job
48
00:02:29,640 --> 00:02:32,110
~ but I'm not important enough
to sit on the panel.
~ Oh, no, no.
49
00:02:32,160 --> 00:02:34,910
~ It's a unique position, Ian.
~ Yes.
~ Yes, no. Brilliant, brilliant.
50
00:02:34,960 --> 00:02:37,760
~ Yes, brilliant. Yes.
~ Yes, no. It's all good.
51
00:02:42,680 --> 00:02:45,550
~ Will!
~ Oh, yeah. Hi, yeah.
~ You're already in?
52
00:02:45,600 --> 00:02:47,310
Yeah. I know, yeah. Mental, yeah.
53
00:02:47,360 --> 00:02:50,830
'But Ian isn't the only one with
professional issues on his mind.
54
00:02:50,880 --> 00:02:52,230
'Following a spectacular coup
55
00:02:52,280 --> 00:02:54,070
'involving the BBC's
Wimbledon coverage
56
00:02:54,120 --> 00:02:57,550
'and his sister's connection with
tennis star Jo-Wilfried Tsonga,
57
00:02:57,600 --> 00:03:00,790
'intern Will Humphries has been
offered a so far temporary post
58
00:03:00,840 --> 00:03:02,950
'as Assistant to the Head of Values.'
59
00:03:03,000 --> 00:03:05,950
So today, you've got, like,
a meeting with Alan...
60
00:03:06,000 --> 00:03:07,270
Alan...
61
00:03:07,320 --> 00:03:09,030
~ Yeah, no. Hang on...
~ Alan who?
62
00:03:09,080 --> 00:03:11,790
~ Yeah, no. Crap, I think
that's a spelling mistake.
~ Alan Yentob?
63
00:03:11,840 --> 00:03:13,670
Yeah, Yentob, yeah.
64
00:03:13,720 --> 00:03:16,950
~ Yen-tob.
~ Yes?
~ Yeah, at ten o'clock.
65
00:03:17,000 --> 00:03:18,430
Ten o'clock?
66
00:03:18,480 --> 00:03:20,790
'As part of his new role,
Will has established himself
67
00:03:20,840 --> 00:03:23,150
'at a desk in the same general
area as fellow assistant
68
00:03:23,200 --> 00:03:24,830
'and colleague Izzy Gould,
69
00:03:24,880 --> 00:03:27,750
'as well as to a lesser
extent, Jack Patterson.'
70
00:03:27,800 --> 00:03:31,070
~ Yes, I think that might be yesterday.
~ Yeah, no. That's... Say again?
71
00:03:31,120 --> 00:03:33,510
Are you sure you're looking at today?
72
00:03:33,560 --> 00:03:36,750
~ Yeah. OK, no.
~ Well, anyway...
~ Yeah, that's what you did yesterday.
73
00:03:36,800 --> 00:03:40,150
~ Yes, but that's always good to know.
~ Yeah. No worries, yeah, cool.
74
00:03:43,760 --> 00:03:46,150
Yes, no. Brilliant. So,
um, before we get started,
75
00:03:46,200 --> 00:03:48,230
~ this morning's news from Tony-land...
~ Great.
76
00:03:48,280 --> 00:03:50,470
.. I think there'll be an
e-mail about this anyway -
77
00:03:50,520 --> 00:03:52,550
~ but he's got this thing in his head...
~ Oh, right.
78
00:03:52,600 --> 00:03:54,070
.. I mean, it was after he came back
79
00:03:54,120 --> 00:03:55,830
~ from Kerala, really...
~ Oh, bloody hell.
80
00:03:55,880 --> 00:03:56,950
'By nine o'clock,
81
00:03:57,000 --> 00:03:59,830
'Ian is already taking part in
the Damage Limitation Meeting
82
00:03:59,880 --> 00:04:02,990
'because that is what he's doing
today. But Simon has some good news
83
00:04:03,040 --> 00:04:05,790
'to share before they get on
to the damage to be limited.'
84
00:04:05,840 --> 00:04:08,590
And this'll be because we've all
got to be more bendy and flexible
85
00:04:08,640 --> 00:04:11,430
~ from now on, is it, Simon?
~ Yes, no. Very good, Tracey. Very strong.
86
00:04:11,480 --> 00:04:13,270
I'm quite happy with
where my toes are.
87
00:04:13,320 --> 00:04:14,910
I don't need to bloody touch them.
88
00:04:14,960 --> 00:04:18,510
'As part of his vision for "a happier,
healthier and better BBC,"
89
00:04:18,560 --> 00:04:20,310
'Director General Lord Tony Hall
90
00:04:20,360 --> 00:04:22,750
'has decided that lunchtime
pilates classes
91
00:04:22,800 --> 00:04:25,990
'will be provided free of charge
for anyone who wants them.'
92
00:04:26,040 --> 00:04:29,070
I mean, I assume this isn't
actually compulsory, Simon?
93
00:04:29,120 --> 00:04:31,510
~ Oh, no-no-nono.
~ No.
~ No. I mean, for what it's worth,
94
00:04:31,560 --> 00:04:34,270
it's just something Tony's a
bit obsessed with personally,
95
00:04:34,320 --> 00:04:35,430
~ that's all.
~ Right.
~ Oh, OK.
96
00:04:35,480 --> 00:04:37,070
~ No, it's for anyone who wants it.
~ Cool.
97
00:04:37,120 --> 00:04:39,830
~ I think the idea is he might
turn up himself occasionally.
~ Right.
98
00:04:39,880 --> 00:04:42,510
~ The what, though? He himself?
~ Yes. I gather so, yes.
~ Right.
99
00:04:42,560 --> 00:04:44,550
~ OK.
~ Groovy.
~ Alrighty. Jolly good.
100
00:04:44,600 --> 00:04:46,390
~ Onwards.
~ Brilliant.
~ So, Neil...
101
00:04:46,440 --> 00:04:47,430
Righty ho.
102
00:04:47,480 --> 00:04:49,710
Where are we are up to with
the whole Evan Davis thing?
103
00:04:49,760 --> 00:04:53,310
~ Oh, right. OK.
~ Evan Davis?
~ Yes.
~ Yeah, basically, we're fucked.
104
00:04:53,360 --> 00:04:55,070
~ Brilliant.
~ Yes, no. Very good.
105
00:04:55,120 --> 00:04:58,390
'In the past 24 hours, rumours
have started to appear on Twitter
106
00:04:58,440 --> 00:05:02,390
'that the BBC's Newsnight anchor
Evan Davis is to be a contestant
107
00:05:02,440 --> 00:05:05,430
'on the forthcoming series
of Strictly Come Dancing.'
108
00:05:05,480 --> 00:05:08,070
Guys, can I just say, we are
taking heavy incoming on this
109
00:05:08,120 --> 00:05:10,590
~ in the Press Office this morning.
~ Yeah, I'm not surprised.
110
00:05:10,640 --> 00:05:13,030
~ We love Strictly.
~ And I'm not being negative or anything,
111
00:05:13,080 --> 00:05:14,550
but this is only going to get worse.
112
00:05:14,600 --> 00:05:17,350
~ Such a cool show.
~ The fact is, this is important.
~ Yeah, I know it is.
113
00:05:17,400 --> 00:05:20,190
~ Yes, no. Very good.
~ It's hard enough to keep
the guy still as it is.
114
00:05:20,240 --> 00:05:22,670
The last thing we need is to
let him anywhere near sequins.
115
00:05:22,720 --> 00:05:25,310
The fact remains, that Newsnight
is actually a serious show.
116
00:05:25,360 --> 00:05:28,070
This is an example of an area where
the BBC needs to be "better."
117
00:05:28,120 --> 00:05:31,070
~ Yes, no. Brilliant, Anna, brilliant.
~ Very good.
~ Yes, no. Very strong.
118
00:05:31,120 --> 00:05:33,430
~ So, hang on, are we saying
these rumours are true?
~ Sure.
119
00:05:33,480 --> 00:05:35,230
~ Yeah, they are, yeah.
~ They are?
~ Yeah, no.
120
00:05:35,280 --> 00:05:38,030
~ He's obsessed with the idea already.
~ No, I get it. I totally get it.
121
00:05:38,080 --> 00:05:40,950
~ Cool guy, cool show.
~ But how did this... These
are both BBC shows...
122
00:05:41,000 --> 00:05:42,750
I have to say, it's
not Evan's fault, OK.
123
00:05:42,800 --> 00:05:45,830
~ It wasn't his idea. He's
been signed up by some agency.
~ An agency?
~ Cool.
124
00:05:45,880 --> 00:05:48,950
~ They seem to think this'd
be good for Brand Evan.
~ Brand Evan?
~ Yeah.
125
00:05:49,000 --> 00:05:50,790
Now, apparently, we have
to go through them
126
00:05:50,840 --> 00:05:52,630
~ whenever we want to talk about it.
~ Sure, no.
127
00:05:52,680 --> 00:05:53,670
Totally good with that.
128
00:05:53,720 --> 00:05:55,950
What kind of agency are we
talking about here, Neil?
129
00:05:56,000 --> 00:05:58,950
Oh, I don't know. Hang on, I've got
a bloody e-mail about it somewhere.
130
00:05:59,000 --> 00:06:00,990
Can I just say, not being
funny or anything,
131
00:06:01,040 --> 00:06:03,110
but I've got a feeling
in my bottom about this
132
00:06:03,160 --> 00:06:06,310
~ and not in a nice way.
~ OK, here we go...
133
00:06:06,360 --> 00:06:09,710
~ Oh, right. OK.
~ What?
134
00:06:09,760 --> 00:06:12,390
No, sure. OK.
135
00:06:12,440 --> 00:06:14,110
~ No.
~ All right, here we go.
136
00:06:14,160 --> 00:06:16,070
OK. So, here's the
thing with this, guys.
137
00:06:16,120 --> 00:06:18,460
This is like the best thing ever.
138
00:06:34,680 --> 00:06:37,710
~ Hi, Lucy.
~ Hi.
~ How are you?
~ Yes, no, I'm fine thanks, yes.
139
00:06:37,760 --> 00:06:40,470
~ Can I just ask, have you
done something to your hair?
~ My hair?
140
00:06:40,520 --> 00:06:43,550
~ Yeah, I don't know.
~ Not really. Why?
~ Have you not? I don't know it's...
141
00:06:43,600 --> 00:06:46,070
~ What do you want?
~ No, nothing. Have you got a minute?
~ Now?
142
00:06:46,120 --> 00:06:48,150
~ Just whilst you're drinking your coffee.
~ Uh...
143
00:06:48,200 --> 00:06:50,230
Would you mind if we
went somewhere private?
144
00:06:50,280 --> 00:06:52,680
~ Somewhere private?
~ Yeah.
~ In here?
145
00:06:52,880 --> 00:06:55,270
~ (I wanted to ask if...)
~ What?
146
00:06:55,320 --> 00:06:57,830
~ (I wanted to ask if...)
~ Actually, this is ridiculous.
147
00:06:57,880 --> 00:06:59,310
~ This is a radio studio.
~ I know.
148
00:06:59,360 --> 00:07:02,470
~ It's soundproof. No-one can hear us in here.
~ No, I just wanted to ask if
149
00:07:02,520 --> 00:07:04,950
I could put your name
down as a referee?
150
00:07:05,000 --> 00:07:08,030
~ Oh, right. You applying for a job?
~ Well...
~ You going to leave us?
151
00:07:08,080 --> 00:07:09,270
~ No, no, not leaving.
~ Oh.
152
00:07:09,320 --> 00:07:12,710
'Entertainment Format Executive David
Wilkes has made a big decision
153
00:07:12,760 --> 00:07:15,310
'about himself and, as a
result, has a private favour
154
00:07:15,360 --> 00:07:16,870
'to ask producer Lucy Freeman.'
155
00:07:16,920 --> 00:07:19,590
~ So, at this stage I don't
want, you know, everyone to...
~ Oh, God.
156
00:07:19,640 --> 00:07:21,350
~ .. I don't want everyone...
~ You're not?
157
00:07:21,400 --> 00:07:23,190
~ You know I trust you...
~ You are, aren't you?
158
00:07:23,240 --> 00:07:25,230
You're applying for Director
of bloody Better?
159
00:07:25,280 --> 00:07:27,990
~ I know what you're thinking...
~ Well, no. Yes, I am actually. Yes.
160
00:07:28,040 --> 00:07:29,310
~ .. I won't get it...
~ No.
~ I know.
161
00:07:29,360 --> 00:07:31,310
But do you know what?
Anyone can apply for it.
162
00:07:31,360 --> 00:07:33,310
And the thing is, it's
like, just by applying,
163
00:07:33,360 --> 00:07:35,750
it puts you in that category
straight away, doesn't it?
164
00:07:35,800 --> 00:07:37,790
What, the category of people
who haven't got it?
165
00:07:37,840 --> 00:07:40,750
~ You should apply for it,
Lucy. Why don't you apply?
~ Me?
~ Yes.
~ Well, I...
166
00:07:40,800 --> 00:07:42,470
No, but seriously,
I respect you, Lucy,
167
00:07:42,520 --> 00:07:45,070
and I like to think we've worked
together closely and well.
168
00:07:45,120 --> 00:07:46,230
You... Right.
169
00:07:46,280 --> 00:07:47,790
Apart from anything else, Siobhan,
170
00:07:47,840 --> 00:07:50,830
~ the issue is conflict
of interest for a start.
~ Nah-ah. It's not an issue.
171
00:07:50,880 --> 00:07:53,550
I don't see how you can be
responsible for Brand BBC
172
00:07:53,600 --> 00:07:55,510
and Brand Evan Davis
at the same time.
173
00:07:55,560 --> 00:07:57,950
No, sure. I do everything at
the same time. It's what I do.
174
00:07:58,000 --> 00:07:59,190
~ Like, get over it.
~ Bollocks.
175
00:07:59,240 --> 00:08:01,310
'Meanwhile, back in
Damage Limitation,
176
00:08:01,360 --> 00:08:05,350
'Siobhan is explaining exactly why
BBC Two Newsnight anchor Evan Davis
177
00:08:05,400 --> 00:08:08,310
'appearing on Strictly Come
Dancing is such a cool idea.
178
00:08:08,360 --> 00:08:10,870
'But, as Current Controller
of News and Current Affairs,
179
00:08:10,920 --> 00:08:12,710
'Neil Reid is not fully convinced.'
180
00:08:12,760 --> 00:08:14,950
~ Have you got any idea what you're doing?
~ OK.
181
00:08:15,000 --> 00:08:16,910
Here's the thing with
this. Here's what it is.
182
00:08:16,960 --> 00:08:19,510
What it is, is the audience for
Strictly is, like, everybody.
183
00:08:19,560 --> 00:08:21,350
~ OK?
~ Well...
~ No, it's not a question - it is.
184
00:08:21,400 --> 00:08:23,870
And the audience for Newsnight
is, like, nobody. Right?
185
00:08:23,920 --> 00:08:26,950
~ That's a slight over-simplification.
~ No. Sure. I'm good with that.
186
00:08:27,000 --> 00:08:28,510
So, like, Evan does Strictly. OK?
187
00:08:28,560 --> 00:08:32,310
He's, like, one cool guy. Suddenly,
I'm, like, "I love this guy."
188
00:08:32,360 --> 00:08:34,350
Like, "You're telling me
he's got his own show?"
189
00:08:34,400 --> 00:08:36,630
~ It's not a fucking chat show.
~ OK, sure. Whatever...
190
00:08:36,680 --> 00:08:39,150
~ Interesting though, Neil.
~ Yes.
~ Interesting way...
~ Yes.
191
00:08:39,200 --> 00:08:41,110
~ Shall we come back to that?
~ Absolutely, yes.
192
00:08:41,160 --> 00:08:43,790
Suddenly, it's like you just
rhinocerised your audience
193
00:08:43,840 --> 00:08:45,070
for Newsnight overnight.
194
00:08:45,120 --> 00:08:48,270
We are sitting in the best known
news organisation in the world, OK.
195
00:08:48,320 --> 00:08:49,790
~ Hurrah(!)
~ Yay(!)
~ Sorry, Neil.
196
00:08:49,840 --> 00:08:52,470
Newsnight is the current
affairs show we're judged on
197
00:08:52,520 --> 00:08:55,470
basically because we haven't got
any other current affairs shows left
198
00:08:55,520 --> 00:08:57,430
~ and believe...
~ Shame.
~ .. believe it or not,
199
00:08:57,480 --> 00:08:59,430
people trust us. God
knows why, but they do.
200
00:08:59,480 --> 00:09:02,310
~ I mean, we get it wrong from time to time...
~ Brilliant.
~ Yes.
201
00:09:02,360 --> 00:09:03,470
Yes, we do, Neil. Yes.
202
00:09:03,520 --> 00:09:05,470
~ Of course we do.
~ Yes.
~ But we work bloody hard.
203
00:09:05,520 --> 00:09:08,670
~ No, Neil. I think you...
~ Look, I just want to see
what it sounds like, OK?
204
00:09:08,720 --> 00:09:11,830
~ Right.
~ I never get to say this stuff.
~ No, of course. Yes.
~ Brilliant.
205
00:09:11,880 --> 00:09:12,870
Go, Neil.
206
00:09:12,920 --> 00:09:16,070
Can you imagine what will happen
if the main anchor of that show
207
00:09:16,120 --> 00:09:18,950
starts turning up on Saturday
nights in spray-on trousers
208
00:09:19,000 --> 00:09:22,830
and sparkly hair, clamped to some
half naked orange-faced girl?
209
00:09:22,880 --> 00:09:25,390
~ Yes, thank you. I can, Neil.
~ No, not you, Tracey.
~ No, I know.
210
00:09:25,440 --> 00:09:27,030
But I'm just saying I can imagine it.
211
00:09:27,080 --> 00:09:29,950
~ Right, yes.
~ And on another of our own channels.
212
00:09:30,000 --> 00:09:31,990
No. I mean, I have to say,
with my Way Ahead hat on,
213
00:09:32,040 --> 00:09:34,310
with Charter Renewal and
everything - this is, I mean,
214
00:09:34,360 --> 00:09:37,270
~ this really is not going
to look great. Is it?
~ Exactly, no.
~ Brilliant.
215
00:09:37,320 --> 00:09:39,030
~ The fact is, this needs to not happen.
~ No.
216
00:09:39,080 --> 00:09:40,590
It's an interesting one, isn't it?
217
00:09:40,640 --> 00:09:43,390
~ And it needs to not happen now.
~ I mean, I may have got this wrong,
218
00:09:43,440 --> 00:09:45,390
~ but as the guy with the Way Ahead hat...
~ Right.
219
00:09:45,440 --> 00:09:48,270
.. and the Values hat - you've got
so many hats, I don't know where...
220
00:09:48,320 --> 00:09:50,790
~ Yes, all right.
~ Are you saying this is something you want
221
00:09:50,840 --> 00:09:53,350
to be across personally
in an ideal world?
222
00:09:53,400 --> 00:09:56,150
I mean, I certainly... I mean,
as I say, this is a really...
223
00:09:56,200 --> 00:09:57,350
~ Brilliant.
~ Brilliant.
224
00:09:57,400 --> 00:10:01,150
~ I mean, this is a core issue
for all of us, I think.
~ No, brilliant, Ian.
225
00:10:01,200 --> 00:10:02,910
~ Brilliant.
~ Yep.
~ OK. Alrighty.
226
00:10:02,960 --> 00:10:05,560
~ Fabulous.
~ Yes.
~ Right.
~ Righty ho.
227
00:10:17,520 --> 00:10:19,430
Crap.
228
00:10:19,480 --> 00:10:21,030
'Meanwhile, at his new desk
229
00:10:21,080 --> 00:10:23,630
'in the general area of
new colleague Izzy Gould,
230
00:10:23,680 --> 00:10:25,350
'Will Humphreys is between sessions
231
00:10:25,400 --> 00:10:27,110
'on his Syncopatico
induction course.'
232
00:10:27,160 --> 00:10:29,440
Crap.
233
00:10:35,440 --> 00:10:36,870
Whoa.
234
00:10:36,920 --> 00:10:40,070
~ Jesus. What?!
~ What?
235
00:10:40,120 --> 00:10:41,830
~ No-no-no-no-no-no.
~ What's wrong?
236
00:10:41,880 --> 00:10:43,750
'The theory is that by
the end of the course,
237
00:10:43,800 --> 00:10:45,710
'he'll be automatically
synced to everyone
238
00:10:45,760 --> 00:10:48,630
'and everything around him whether
they realise it or not.'
239
00:10:48,680 --> 00:10:51,990
~ That's me!
~ Yeah. Say again?
~ That's my stuff you've got there.
240
00:10:52,040 --> 00:10:54,710
~ Whoa.
~ I was working on that. What have you done?
~ That's amazing.
241
00:10:54,760 --> 00:10:55,830
It's like it just does it.
242
00:10:55,880 --> 00:10:58,870
~ Like, we were doing SyncopatiPair...
~ SyncopatiPair?
~ Yeah.
~ Oh, right.
243
00:10:58,920 --> 00:11:01,590
~ .. the same thing happened with this girl.
~ You have to undo this.
244
00:11:01,640 --> 00:11:04,310
~ The guy said he's never seen that before.
~ You have to undo it now.
245
00:11:04,360 --> 00:11:05,350
~ Yeah, good luck.
~ Yeah.
246
00:11:05,400 --> 00:11:08,910
~ Cos, like, I don't know what I did.
~ Right. OK. Give me that.
247
00:11:08,960 --> 00:11:11,190
~ Is it always girls?
~ What? Yeah, I don't know.
248
00:11:11,240 --> 00:11:13,190
Cos, you got to say, that's
pretty impressive.
249
00:11:13,240 --> 00:11:15,790
OK - System Preferences - you're
going to need your password.
250
00:11:15,840 --> 00:11:17,790
~ Yeah.
~ Want to put it in?
251
00:11:17,840 --> 00:11:19,720
Yeah. OK.
252
00:11:28,200 --> 00:11:29,550
Yeah. Crap.
253
00:11:29,600 --> 00:11:31,230
You're not having much luck, are you?
254
00:11:31,280 --> 00:11:33,630
~ Yeah. It's not working.
Like, at least we know that.
~ OK.
255
00:11:33,680 --> 00:11:35,790
~ What is it?
~ Yeah.
~ You can't just have his password.
256
00:11:35,840 --> 00:11:38,310
~ I don't care, he can choose
a new one. What is it, Will?
~ Yeah.
257
00:11:38,360 --> 00:11:40,480
~ Yeah, so...
~ Will?
258
00:11:43,080 --> 00:11:44,870
~ I.
~ I.
259
00:11:44,920 --> 00:11:46,550
~ Yeah, Z.
~ Z.
260
00:11:46,600 --> 00:11:48,070
Z.
261
00:11:48,120 --> 00:11:49,840
Z.
262
00:11:51,160 --> 00:11:52,630
Y.
263
00:11:52,680 --> 00:11:54,390
Y. Right.
264
00:11:54,440 --> 00:11:55,710
Yeah.
265
00:11:55,760 --> 00:11:57,070
Then, G.
266
00:11:57,120 --> 00:11:58,270
G. Yep.
267
00:11:58,320 --> 00:12:00,230
~ O.
~ O-U-L-D.
~ Yeah.
268
00:12:00,280 --> 00:12:02,390
O-U-L-D. Yeah.
269
00:12:02,440 --> 00:12:04,550
~ Oh, then 4.
~ 4?
270
00:12:04,600 --> 00:12:08,230
Yeah, I don't know. That's
just, like, a number.
271
00:12:08,280 --> 00:12:09,990
~ Yeah, crap.
~ Right.
272
00:12:10,040 --> 00:12:12,590
~ You can try my name, if you like?
~ Yeah.
~ Shall I spell it for you?
273
00:12:12,640 --> 00:12:14,840
~ Yeah, no. Say again?
~ Shut up.
274
00:12:16,480 --> 00:12:18,710
In fact, I sometimes
say to my beginners
275
00:12:18,760 --> 00:12:20,790
that pilates is about three things -
276
00:12:20,840 --> 00:12:23,510
Breathing, Engaging Your
Core, and Posture.
277
00:12:23,560 --> 00:12:25,910
~ Or, as we call them, the Pelvic Three.
~ Brilliant.
278
00:12:25,960 --> 00:12:28,750
'Meanwhile, it's Friday. And
there's an impressive turnout
279
00:12:28,800 --> 00:12:32,390
'for the first ever free lunchtime
BBC pilates session.
280
00:12:32,440 --> 00:12:35,390
'Even though Director General
Lord Tony Hall himself
281
00:12:35,440 --> 00:12:36,990
'hasn't so far arrived yet.'
282
00:12:37,040 --> 00:12:39,710
~ Now, especially if you're just starting...
~ No. The fact is...
283
00:12:39,760 --> 00:12:42,790
~ So, we're not actually talking.
~ The fact is, I...
~ We're not talking,
284
00:12:42,840 --> 00:12:44,350
we're just listening at this point.
285
00:12:44,400 --> 00:12:46,510
So, in pilates, we breathe
in through the nose...
286
00:12:46,560 --> 00:12:49,110
.. two, three, four.
287
00:12:49,160 --> 00:12:51,230
And then we're exhaling
though the mouth...
288
00:12:51,280 --> 00:12:53,550
.. two, three, four.
289
00:12:53,600 --> 00:12:56,070
Inhaling through... Yes.
So, we're doing it now. Yes?
290
00:12:56,120 --> 00:12:59,070
Inhaling through the nose
- two, three, four -
291
00:12:59,120 --> 00:13:00,310
and then when we exhale,
292
00:13:00,360 --> 00:13:03,860
we're going to suck the belly
button right into the spine
293
00:13:04,800 --> 00:13:06,710
Two, three, four.
294
00:13:06,760 --> 00:13:08,750
~ Can I ask a question?
~ Of course. Yeah.
295
00:13:08,800 --> 00:13:11,990
When we're breathing, should we
be two, three, fouring like you?
296
00:13:12,040 --> 00:13:14,150
~ Well...
~ No.
~ Cos, I'm not being funny or anything,
297
00:13:14,200 --> 00:13:17,270
~ but what with inhaling and exhaling
and sucking and what have you...
~ No.
298
00:13:17,320 --> 00:13:21,320
~ You don't have to do that. The fact is...
~ OK. And stop breathing.
299
00:13:21,880 --> 00:13:23,950
~ Sorry, Anna. Sorry, guys.
~ Er, we are actually...
300
00:13:24,000 --> 00:13:25,190
No, that's OK, Jack. Come in.
301
00:13:25,240 --> 00:13:27,910
~ No, it's just, I finally got
hold of Alice in Tony's office.
~ Yes.
302
00:13:27,960 --> 00:13:30,550
~ Just so you now, he's not
actually in this morning.
~ Right.
~ OK.
303
00:13:30,600 --> 00:13:32,510
~ Apparently, he and Simon went to...
~ Yes, OK.
304
00:13:32,560 --> 00:13:35,160
~ Yes, so I just...
~ Yes. OK, good.
~ Sure.
305
00:13:36,360 --> 00:13:38,670
Right. OK, if we're done?
306
00:13:38,720 --> 00:13:41,870
So, what we're going to do - we're
going to take what we've learned
307
00:13:41,920 --> 00:13:44,110
about our breathing
and we're going to...
308
00:13:44,160 --> 00:13:46,030
Yeah. So, I'm going
to go, I'm afraid.
309
00:13:46,080 --> 00:13:48,190
~ Right.
~ Sorry.
~ No. Well, that's...
310
00:13:48,240 --> 00:13:50,150
The fact is, I've run out of time.
311
00:13:50,200 --> 00:13:53,270
~ Er, good luck with the breathing. Obviously.
~ Sure.
312
00:13:53,320 --> 00:13:56,880
~ Perhaps another time.
~ Well, yes. Let's hope so, perhaps.
~ Yes.
313
00:14:05,760 --> 00:14:07,270
OK. So, what we're going to do now,
314
00:14:07,320 --> 00:14:09,990
we're going to take what we've
learned from our breathing
315
00:14:10,040 --> 00:14:13,390
and we're going get familiar
with our pelvic girdle.
316
00:14:13,440 --> 00:14:14,750
~ Oh, right. OK.
~ Oh, my God.
317
00:14:14,800 --> 00:14:18,390
~ Actually, do you know what,
just while we've stopped...
~ OK, sure.
318
00:14:18,440 --> 00:14:20,710
~ I think I'm going to have to go, as well.
~ Brilliant.
319
00:14:20,760 --> 00:14:21,990
~ Right.
~ Yes, no. Very good.
320
00:14:22,040 --> 00:14:25,630
~ Sorry. I mean, if that's
going to be all right?
~ No, yes. I mean...
321
00:14:25,680 --> 00:14:28,310
Really sorry. It's just,
um, some stuff I...
322
00:14:28,360 --> 00:14:30,830
promised I'd look at
for this afternoon.
323
00:14:30,880 --> 00:14:33,390
~ Well, again, maybe next time.
~ No, sure. Absolutely.
324
00:14:33,440 --> 00:14:34,910
Really enjoyed it, by the way.
325
00:14:34,960 --> 00:14:38,070
~ Yep.
~ Good.
~ Brilliant.
~ Thank you so much. Yeah,
no. Really, really great.
326
00:14:38,120 --> 00:14:40,470
Have fun, everybody.
327
00:14:40,520 --> 00:14:42,120
Righty ho.
328
00:14:45,310 --> 00:14:46,310
OK. Well...
329
00:14:46,360 --> 00:14:48,710
~ Have to say, it is unusual
to lose so many this early.
~ Yes.
330
00:14:48,760 --> 00:14:50,830
But the fewer the number
the greater the glory.
331
00:14:50,880 --> 00:14:53,350
Can I just say, just so you
know, I'm not going anywhere.
332
00:14:53,400 --> 00:14:56,670
~ Sure.
~ Cos, I'm not being funny or
anything, I don't know about you,
333
00:14:56,720 --> 00:14:59,270
but if you get a chance to get
familiar with your pelvic girdle
334
00:14:59,320 --> 00:15:02,400
~ for free, I'm going to take it.
~ Oh, no. Tell me about it.
335
00:15:17,920 --> 00:15:20,030
~ Hi.
~ Oh, hi. Lucy, yes. How are you?
~ Yes, fine. Yes.
336
00:15:20,080 --> 00:15:22,310
~ Great.
~ Actually, I've been...
~ That's really great.
337
00:15:22,360 --> 00:15:24,430
~ I was going to e-mail you.
~ Yes, so was I.
~ No, great.
338
00:15:24,480 --> 00:15:27,110
I was going to ask if you'd be
able to scribble something down
339
00:15:27,160 --> 00:15:30,430
~ on paper for me.
~ Scribble something down?
~ Or in an e-mail.
340
00:15:30,480 --> 00:15:33,670
~ Just a record of where
we're up to with Home Truth.
~ Oh, OK.
341
00:15:33,720 --> 00:15:34,710
~ Yep.
~ Right, OK.
342
00:15:34,760 --> 00:15:37,950
'At the moment, Generic Head of
Comedy and/or Drama Matt Taverner
343
00:15:38,000 --> 00:15:39,190
'is a particularly busy man.
344
00:15:39,240 --> 00:15:42,310
'And among the many projects that
are currently uppermost in his mind
345
00:15:42,360 --> 00:15:44,630
'is his interview for the
new Director of Better post
346
00:15:44,680 --> 00:15:45,710
'at the end of the week.'
347
00:15:45,760 --> 00:15:47,470
When would you need this thing by?
348
00:15:47,520 --> 00:15:50,190
Sure. It'd be really good to get
something in the next few days.
349
00:15:50,240 --> 00:15:51,590
~ Right.
~ Tomorrow would be great.
350
00:15:51,640 --> 00:15:54,350
Cos I still haven't managed to
get hold of Dan since the meeting.
351
00:15:54,400 --> 00:15:57,190
~ No, sure.
~ He's not returning e-mails
or picking up messages.
~ Sure.
352
00:15:57,240 --> 00:15:59,950
~ I'm a bit worried, I'm not
sure what's happened to him.
~ No, sure.
353
00:16:00,000 --> 00:16:01,150
That's really great, Lucy.
354
00:16:01,200 --> 00:16:03,790
~ What do you think about Neighbourhood?
~ Neighbourhood?
~ Yeah.
355
00:16:03,840 --> 00:16:05,270
~ Sorry?
~ As a title, I mean.
~ A title?
356
00:16:05,320 --> 00:16:08,110
~ Yeah, I dunno. I've just got this feeling.
~ But after the meeting...
357
00:16:08,160 --> 00:16:10,110
Matt, Home Truth was about
the only thing left.
358
00:16:10,160 --> 00:16:11,910
~ Yeah, no. Sure, absolutely. Yeah.
~ Right.
359
00:16:11,960 --> 00:16:14,430
Thanks, Lucy. That'd be really great.
360
00:16:34,720 --> 00:16:36,670
If Evan Davis does
Strictly Come Dancing,
361
00:16:36,720 --> 00:16:39,070
~ he's crossed the fucking Rubicon, OK?
~ Excuse me?
362
00:16:39,120 --> 00:16:42,630
~ He's never doing Newsnight again.
~ OK. So that's, like, discrimination.
363
00:16:42,680 --> 00:16:46,230
~ OK?
~ What?
~ Well, hang on...
~ So that's illegal right off of the bat.
364
00:16:46,280 --> 00:16:49,990
'It's another morning and Ian has
asked Neil, Tracey and Siobhan
365
00:16:50,040 --> 00:16:52,550
'to come in early for
a breakfast meeting.
366
00:16:52,600 --> 00:16:56,030
'Overnight, the contestants for the
next series of Strictly Come Dancing
367
00:16:56,080 --> 00:16:58,270
'have been officially and
irrevocably announced.'
368
00:16:58,320 --> 00:17:00,030
OK, OK. Here's the deal here. OK?
369
00:17:00,080 --> 00:17:04,110
Evan is like a living, breathing...
I mean, he's like a person. OK?
370
00:17:04,160 --> 00:17:07,430
He's always wanted to dance.
He's, like, obsessed with Kylie.
371
00:17:07,480 --> 00:17:11,390
Like, he can do Can't Get You Out
Of My Head with all the moves. OK.
372
00:17:11,440 --> 00:17:12,910
This is, like, his moment, OK?
373
00:17:12,960 --> 00:17:16,350
This is where shit happens for him,
this is going to change his life.
374
00:17:16,400 --> 00:17:18,030
~ Right.
~ Blimey.
~ Bollocks.
375
00:17:18,080 --> 00:17:21,030
~ OK. He doesn't do Strictly,
he's not doing Newslight. OK.
~ News-NIGHT.
376
00:17:21,080 --> 00:17:22,150
Sure. Whatever. Period.
377
00:17:22,200 --> 00:17:23,950
~ That's the deal here, guys.
~ Fine. OK.
378
00:17:24,000 --> 00:17:25,870
~ Evan's actually said that to you?
~ Sure.
379
00:17:25,920 --> 00:17:28,710
~ No, I'm sorry, Siobhan. I don't...
~ I'm saying it to you now. OK?
380
00:17:28,760 --> 00:17:31,510
~ Get over it.
~ Fine, great. Deal.
~ Right.
~ Cool.
381
00:17:31,560 --> 00:17:34,100
~ Great.
~ Sure.
~ Fine.
~ Right, OK. Good.
382
00:17:35,640 --> 00:17:37,950
Do you know what? Maybe they're
not a Scottish family.
383
00:17:38,000 --> 00:17:39,790
Maybe they're, like,
an Indian family, OK.
384
00:17:39,840 --> 00:17:41,190
What is it, those Indian things?
385
00:17:41,240 --> 00:17:43,430
It's like you sit on them and
hit them at the same time?
386
00:17:43,480 --> 00:17:46,070
'For a while now, David Wilkes
has been working on the format
387
00:17:46,120 --> 00:17:50,350
'of Family Face Off. A theoretical
idea for a new BBC One show.
388
00:17:50,400 --> 00:17:53,830
'But, drawing on past experience,
Head of Output Anna Rampton
389
00:17:53,880 --> 00:17:56,750
'has induced producer Lucy
Freeman to work alongside him
390
00:17:56,800 --> 00:17:58,870
'in order to help him make
it less theoretical.
391
00:17:58,920 --> 00:18:01,230
~ And the other one can do twerking...
~ Yeah, all right.
392
00:18:01,280 --> 00:18:03,350
And the great thing about
this format, Anna...
393
00:18:03,400 --> 00:18:06,590
'There are some details still to
be finalised, but luckily Anna
394
00:18:06,640 --> 00:18:09,790
'has the ability to see past
detail to the potential benefits
395
00:18:09,840 --> 00:18:13,430
'of a show that's mainstream,
warm, inclusive and hers.'
396
00:18:13,480 --> 00:18:16,350
The fact is, people don't think
in formats. They think in faces.
397
00:18:16,400 --> 00:18:17,590
~ I know, exactly. Yes.
~ Right.
398
00:18:17,640 --> 00:18:20,070
If this thing's going to work,
we need contemporary faces
399
00:18:20,120 --> 00:18:21,790
~ attached from the start.
~ Right.
400
00:18:21,840 --> 00:18:24,880
~ Contemporary faces?
~ Yes. Exactly, yes. ~ Yes.
~ Yes. ~ Right.
401
00:18:29,080 --> 00:18:32,510
So, a thought I had, guys
- and stay with me on this -
402
00:18:32,560 --> 00:18:34,110
Idris Elba.
403
00:18:34,160 --> 00:18:36,710
~ Right.
~ Idris Elba?
~ I know.
404
00:18:36,760 --> 00:18:39,310
~ But he's not actually a presenter, is he?
~ No, he isn't. No.
405
00:18:39,360 --> 00:18:42,270
~ I know, but he's just such a beautiful man.
~ Right.
~ OK.
406
00:18:42,320 --> 00:18:44,790
And the thing is sometimes you've
got to make things happen
407
00:18:44,840 --> 00:18:46,310
instead of hoping they'll happen.
408
00:18:46,360 --> 00:18:48,470
~ The fact is, no-one's hoping that'll happen.
~ No.
409
00:18:48,520 --> 00:18:50,920
~ Least of all Idris.
~ Right, no. OK.
410
00:18:52,120 --> 00:18:54,830
Do you know what? Can I just say,
it's difficult this, isn't it?
411
00:18:54,880 --> 00:18:55,870
But, hang on, sorry.
412
00:18:55,920 --> 00:18:57,190
Cos I'm just catching up here.
413
00:18:57,240 --> 00:18:59,310
~ This is absolutely your thing, David.
~ Oh, I know.
414
00:18:59,360 --> 00:19:02,910
~ But what is it... what is
it you're wanting to do here?
~ To do?
~ Yes.
415
00:19:02,960 --> 00:19:04,990
No, sorry. You've lost
me already there, Lucy.
416
00:19:05,040 --> 00:19:07,230
If you really want this to
be an inclusive thing...
417
00:19:07,280 --> 00:19:09,590
~ Yes. Exactly, yes.
~ .. if that's what this is about...
418
00:19:09,640 --> 00:19:11,990
~ The fact is, this is about being better.
~ Absolutely.
419
00:19:12,040 --> 00:19:14,870
~ And inclusive, obviously.
~ Yes.
~ OK, so there are lots of ways...
420
00:19:14,920 --> 00:19:17,190
~ Ainsley Harriott.
~ No.
~ No, OK. Sorry, Lucy.
421
00:19:17,240 --> 00:19:20,110
No, I was just, there are lots of
ways of... I mean, I don't know,
422
00:19:20,160 --> 00:19:22,430
if you've got some kid can
play, like, the saxophone,
423
00:19:22,480 --> 00:19:24,470
get Courtney Pine in as
a mentor or judge or...
424
00:19:24,520 --> 00:19:25,990
~ Yes!
~ Yes.
~ .. or, get Madhur Jaffrey
425
00:19:26,040 --> 00:19:28,310
~ if you've got some dad cooking curry, or...
~ Genius.
426
00:19:28,360 --> 00:19:30,310
~ Yes, exactly.
~ You know, or get what's his name
427
00:19:30,360 --> 00:19:32,710
if you've got a kid who can
do cartwheels and whatever.
428
00:19:32,760 --> 00:19:36,270
~ Gymnast, did Strictly...
~ Ooh-ooh - Louis Smith!
~ Louis Smith, yes.
~ Yes.
429
00:19:36,320 --> 00:19:39,470
~ Ooh, lovely Louis. Stop it, Lucy.
~ Yes. OK, good.
430
00:19:39,520 --> 00:19:42,310
And, I don't know, Family Face Off
- if you really want inclusive,
431
00:19:42,360 --> 00:19:45,880
~ call it One Big Family or something instead.
~ One Big Family?
432
00:19:50,320 --> 00:19:53,750
Can I just say, I can feel the
wand of history passing over us.
433
00:19:53,800 --> 00:19:56,750
But, like I say, this isn't my area.
I don't know how these things work.
434
00:19:56,800 --> 00:19:58,110
So, in this scenario, Ian,
435
00:19:58,160 --> 00:20:01,510
Evan would be like an undercover
reporter on Strictly, would he?
436
00:20:01,560 --> 00:20:03,510
~ Well...
~ Cool.
~ Undercover?
437
00:20:03,560 --> 00:20:06,350
~ Yes.
~ He's Evan fucking Davis.
~ He so is.
438
00:20:06,400 --> 00:20:09,510
'Back in Frankie Howerd, they
may be in the Last Chance Saloon
439
00:20:09,560 --> 00:20:12,670
'with Evan Davis-gate, but
Ian has come up with an idea
440
00:20:12,720 --> 00:20:15,270
'that could just be the best
option available to them,
441
00:20:15,320 --> 00:20:17,670
'given that they haven't
got any other options.'
442
00:20:17,720 --> 00:20:18,830
I suppose the question is,
443
00:20:18,880 --> 00:20:21,430
is there an angle on Strictly
that a programme like Newsnight
444
00:20:21,480 --> 00:20:24,190
~ might just be doing a report on?
~ This is a joke, right?
~ Well...
445
00:20:24,240 --> 00:20:26,870
~ Evan Davis embedded in Elstree?
~ Well, OK. If you like.
446
00:20:26,920 --> 00:20:29,470
All I'm asking, I mean,
would that help us at all?
447
00:20:29,520 --> 00:20:32,110
~ Right.
~ No. Bollocks, Ian.
~ Sure, I'm totally good with that.
448
00:20:32,160 --> 00:20:35,030
'But if the idea is to work, the
challenge is to find an angle
449
00:20:35,080 --> 00:20:37,430
'on Strictly Come Dancing
that's serious enough
450
00:20:37,480 --> 00:20:38,830
'to be worthy of Newsnight.'
451
00:20:38,880 --> 00:20:42,470
~ When you say an angle, Ian...
~ I mean, is there...
~ OK. OK. Shoes.
452
00:20:42,520 --> 00:20:44,990
~ Well, no.
~ Shoes?
~ Sure. Like, how everyone loves heels.
453
00:20:45,040 --> 00:20:47,070
~ I've seen stuff on that. That's a cool idea.
~ Yes.
454
00:20:47,120 --> 00:20:49,430
I'm not sure that's Newsnight
territory, is it Neil?
455
00:20:49,480 --> 00:20:51,470
~ You expect me to answer that?
~ Right. OK, no.
456
00:20:51,520 --> 00:20:52,990
~ OK. OK. Gay stuff.
~ Gay stuff?
~ What?
457
00:20:53,040 --> 00:20:55,990
~ Like, why we're all gay these
days. I mean, that's a no-brainer.
~ Right.
458
00:20:56,040 --> 00:20:57,430
I think's that's perhaps a bit...
459
00:20:57,480 --> 00:20:59,750
Can I just say, I'm finding
it difficult to think here.
460
00:20:59,800 --> 00:21:03,150
I mean, is there something that feels
a bit more heavyweight than shoes?
461
00:21:03,200 --> 00:21:04,790
~ OK. Heavyweight?
~ Yes.
~ OK. Right.
462
00:21:04,840 --> 00:21:06,630
~ Fat people.
~ No. Not fat people, Siobhan.
463
00:21:06,680 --> 00:21:08,430
That's really not, that's not very...
464
00:21:08,480 --> 00:21:11,590
~ It's not very good.
~ Well, I mean, that's, it's... Although...
~ What?
465
00:21:11,640 --> 00:21:14,990
~ I mean, I suppose... I mean,
body image is something...
~ Sure.
466
00:21:15,040 --> 00:21:18,470
~ Body image?
~ Oh, right.
~ You know, the whole body stereotyping issue.
467
00:21:18,520 --> 00:21:20,950
Sure exactly. Fat people.
Like I said. It's perfect.
468
00:21:21,000 --> 00:21:24,500
It is an area that, it's sort
of in the air at the moment.
469
00:21:25,040 --> 00:21:26,230
~ It's...
~ Yes?
~ It really is...
470
00:21:26,280 --> 00:21:28,590
~ Could you stop doing that, please, Siobhan?
~ Sure.
~ Yes.
471
00:21:28,640 --> 00:21:29,630
Just a bit difficult...
472
00:21:29,680 --> 00:21:32,470
~ Sure. I'm good with that.
~ Yeah, shut up.
~ No, yes. It's just one of...
473
00:21:32,520 --> 00:21:35,510
Like, I had to finish. Right?
474
00:21:35,560 --> 00:21:37,150
No, I don't know, it just feels like
475
00:21:37,200 --> 00:21:39,990
~ it might be something in this general area.
~ Sure, totally.
476
00:21:40,040 --> 00:21:41,590
Cos, I'm not being funny or anything,
477
00:21:41,640 --> 00:21:43,950
but when you actually think
of it - when was the last time
478
00:21:44,000 --> 00:21:46,830
~ anyone fat or old ever actually
won Strictly Come Dancing?
~ Nah-ah.
479
00:21:46,880 --> 00:21:49,350
~ Well, yes.
~ No. That's, like, eww. Not going to happen.
480
00:21:49,400 --> 00:21:51,670
Also, as a woman, I
am going to say this,
481
00:21:51,720 --> 00:21:52,910
personally I have had enough
482
00:21:52,960 --> 00:21:55,870
~ of being compared to
Abbey Clancy all the time.
~ Well, yes. That's...
483
00:21:55,920 --> 00:21:57,350
~ We love Abbey.
~ That must be...
484
00:21:57,400 --> 00:21:59,670
~ I'm sure it's the same for men.
~ Well, it... Yes.
485
00:21:59,720 --> 00:22:01,910
No. I think I would believe
that gender stereotyping
486
00:22:01,960 --> 00:22:04,830
~ is an area Newsnight might
get itself involved with.
~ Sure, totally.
487
00:22:04,880 --> 00:22:07,590
~ I got to say, I agree, Ian.
~ I mean, Neil?
488
00:22:07,640 --> 00:22:10,510
~ Yeah, I'm always being
compared to Abbey Clancy.
~ Right.
489
00:22:10,560 --> 00:22:13,030
~ It's a bloody nightmare.
~ Right. OK.
490
00:22:13,720 --> 00:22:14,950
~ We should just tell him.
~ No.
491
00:22:15,000 --> 00:22:17,030
We're all grown ups - well,
you and I are anyway.
492
00:22:17,080 --> 00:22:19,190
I'm not asking him to move
- I'm not going to do that.
493
00:22:19,240 --> 00:22:20,790
That's all right. I'll do it for you.
494
00:22:20,840 --> 00:22:23,670
'Elsewhere in the building, Izzy
and Jack have taken some time out
495
00:22:23,720 --> 00:22:25,790
'to discuss professional
issues of their own.'
496
00:22:25,840 --> 00:22:26,830
It's a nightmare.
497
00:22:26,880 --> 00:22:29,270
You never know what he's going
to pair himself with next.
498
00:22:29,320 --> 00:22:31,270
~ Cos Will's a nice guy...
~ Yeah, no. He's lovely.
499
00:22:31,320 --> 00:22:34,270
He's just useless, that's all. He
shouldn't actually be an assistant.
500
00:22:34,320 --> 00:22:35,710
~ It's not great for us, is it?
~ What?
501
00:22:35,760 --> 00:22:37,830
~ To be on the same...
~ God, that's so typical.
~ What?
502
00:22:37,880 --> 00:22:39,790
Will tries really hard
at everything he does.
503
00:22:39,840 --> 00:22:42,110
And that just makes the fact
he's useless even worse.
504
00:22:42,160 --> 00:22:44,030
It's not like it's going
to be an issue for me.
505
00:22:44,080 --> 00:22:46,350
What do you mean, it's not
going to be an issue for you?
506
00:22:46,400 --> 00:22:49,430
~ No, nothing.
~ Wait a minute.
~ Nothing.
~ No, tell me. I'm going to find out.
507
00:22:49,480 --> 00:22:52,110
~ Just tell me.
~ All I'm saying is, it's
you I'm thinking about.
508
00:22:52,160 --> 00:22:54,990
~ Bloody hell. It's Anna.
~ What?
~ She's going to get the job.
~ Is she?
509
00:22:55,040 --> 00:22:56,710
~ What's she offered you?
~ This is all you.
510
00:22:56,760 --> 00:22:58,510
It's development, isn't
it? Or Research?
511
00:22:58,560 --> 00:23:01,510
~ I haven't said anything.
~ Great. So that just leaves
me and bloody Will.
512
00:23:01,560 --> 00:23:02,910
~ I thought he was a nice guy.
~ What?
513
00:23:02,960 --> 00:23:05,830
See? I told you. It's
you I'm thinking about.
514
00:23:24,680 --> 00:23:26,990
'Monday. Some more
things have happened
515
00:23:27,040 --> 00:23:30,150
'and it's the start of a new
and different week at the BBC.
516
00:23:30,200 --> 00:23:33,790
'Anna Rampton is arriving at New
Broadcasting House this morning
517
00:23:33,840 --> 00:23:36,070
'with even more of an
awareness than usual
518
00:23:36,120 --> 00:23:38,590
'f being a woman walking
towards her destiny.
519
00:23:38,640 --> 00:23:41,550
'But, meanwhile, inside
in the Syncopatic Cafe,
520
00:23:41,600 --> 00:23:44,190
'writer Dan Shepherd has come
down to London from Wetherby
521
00:23:44,240 --> 00:23:46,630
'and has asked if he can come
in and talk to Lucy Freeman
522
00:23:46,680 --> 00:23:47,830
'bout the future.'
523
00:23:47,880 --> 00:23:50,030
~ I don't know anything about Walthamstow.
~ No, no.
524
00:23:50,080 --> 00:23:52,790
~ I don't even know how you get there.
~ Well, like I said on the phone,
525
00:23:52,840 --> 00:23:55,590
~ it's not about the script really, Dan.
~ I suppose you just get a bus.
526
00:23:55,640 --> 00:23:58,710
'Since Generic Head of Comedy and/or
Drama Matt Taverner's idea
527
00:23:58,760 --> 00:24:01,750
'of setting Dan's small town
love story either Home Truth
528
00:24:01,800 --> 00:24:04,430
'or Neighbourhood in Walthamstow
instead of Scarborough,
529
00:24:04,480 --> 00:24:06,110
'he's had time to think about that.'
530
00:24:06,160 --> 00:24:07,550
Depending on how you feel about it
531
00:24:07,600 --> 00:24:09,790
I think we might be able to
make this work in our favour
532
00:24:09,840 --> 00:24:13,470
~ if we're really careful about it.
~ Yeah.
~ Dan?
~ Yeah, no. It's fine.
533
00:24:13,520 --> 00:24:15,790
~ I think I might have
had enough though, really.
~ No, no.
534
00:24:15,840 --> 00:24:16,830
If that's OK with you?
535
00:24:16,880 --> 00:24:19,910
~ Obviously, I don't want to...
~ No, you mustn't. You can't just give up.
536
00:24:19,960 --> 00:24:22,270
~ Actually, I should probably get off, really.
~ No, no.
537
00:24:22,320 --> 00:24:24,670
~ Don't want to miss my train.
~ No, if you give up then...
538
00:24:24,720 --> 00:24:27,470
~ I mean - you can't.
~ I'm looking after my landlady's cat.
539
00:24:27,520 --> 00:24:29,590
Yes, but you mustn't
let it defeat you, Dan.
540
00:24:29,640 --> 00:24:30,950
No, it's OK. It's just it's old.
541
00:24:31,000 --> 00:24:34,100
It keeps forgetting where
it is and then it panics.
542
00:24:37,680 --> 00:24:38,950
'It's nearly ten o'clock,
543
00:24:39,000 --> 00:24:41,750
'and Ian is on his way back
from somewhere for a meeting.'
544
00:24:41,800 --> 00:24:44,830
~ Hi.
~ Yes. Hi, yes.
~ I didn't have you down as a smoker.
545
00:24:44,880 --> 00:24:47,750
~ No, I'm not.
~ Right.
~ Yes, they're horrid. Yes.
546
00:24:48,600 --> 00:24:53,070
~ You OK?
~ Yes, no. I'm fine, thanks,
yes. No, yes. I'm just out here.
547
00:24:53,120 --> 00:24:54,800
Right.
548
00:24:59,720 --> 00:25:01,590
Yes. First of all, we
should probably say,
549
00:25:01,640 --> 00:25:04,110
"All hail Her Royal Highness
Princess Anna of Better."
550
00:25:04,160 --> 00:25:06,310
~ Right, yes.
~ Yay!
~ Brilliant!
~ OK.
551
00:25:06,360 --> 00:25:08,110
~ All hail.
~ Yeah, great.
552
00:25:08,160 --> 00:25:10,030
'Meanwhile, inside Tommy Cooper,
553
00:25:10,080 --> 00:25:13,150
'momentous and much anticipated
events are unfolding.'
554
00:25:13,200 --> 00:25:15,870
~ I'm sorry, Simon. Can I ask something?
~ Yes, of course, Tracey.
555
00:25:15,920 --> 00:25:18,710
~ Of course you can.
~ I've got to say, as something
of a woman myself,
556
00:25:18,760 --> 00:25:21,670
~ it's great that Anna has
got this job, obviously.
~ Yes.
~ Sure.
557
00:25:21,720 --> 00:25:25,190
~ Brilliant.
~ Brilliant.
~ Go, Anna!
~ But, I'm sorry, I am going to say this -
558
00:25:25,240 --> 00:25:26,950
Director of Better what?
559
00:25:27,000 --> 00:25:28,590
~ Ah, yes.
~ No, very good.
560
00:25:28,640 --> 00:25:31,070
'With Anna Rampton now
officially confirmed
561
00:25:31,120 --> 00:25:33,470
'as the BBC's first ever
Director of Better,
562
00:25:33,520 --> 00:25:36,670
'this is a potentially defining
moment for everyone else.'
563
00:25:36,720 --> 00:25:37,910
Yes, no. Brilliant, Tracey.
564
00:25:37,960 --> 00:25:40,550
Anna, I don't know if you want
to say a few words at this point?
565
00:25:40,600 --> 00:25:42,070
~ No.
~ No? OK.
~ Not at this stage, no.
566
00:25:42,120 --> 00:25:44,230
~ Brilliant.
~ The fact is, there'll be an e-mail
567
00:25:44,280 --> 00:25:47,110
~ introducing myself globally.
~ Cool.
~ Of course. Brilliant.
~ Right.
568
00:25:47,160 --> 00:25:49,950
~ No, I'm totally good with that.
~ Alrighty. So... moving on...
569
00:25:50,000 --> 00:25:51,870
~ No. Hang on a minute...
~ Neil, yes. Of course.
570
00:25:51,920 --> 00:25:53,550
~ What's the bloody answer?
~ Brilliant.
571
00:25:53,600 --> 00:25:56,110
~ I mean, it's got to mean
something, hasn't it?
~ Exactly, yes.
572
00:25:56,160 --> 00:25:58,150
~ Thank you, Neil. Yes.
~ Er, no. Brilliant, Neil.
573
00:25:58,200 --> 00:26:01,030
No, listen. For what it's worth,
I guess, in Tony's head,
574
00:26:01,080 --> 00:26:03,550
I mean, listen, what can any
of us know about Tony's head?
575
00:26:03,600 --> 00:26:05,390
But I think basically
it's about, you know,
576
00:26:05,440 --> 00:26:07,750
it's about interrogating
everything we currently do
577
00:26:07,800 --> 00:26:12,040
and asking the question, you know...
Asking the, you know, the... yes.
578
00:26:15,120 --> 00:26:17,910
~ Is this as good as it could be?
~ Is this as good as it could be?
579
00:26:17,960 --> 00:26:19,030
And, I guess, from now on,
580
00:26:19,080 --> 00:26:21,790
~ if it doesn't get past the Director
of Better, we don't do it.
~ No.
581
00:26:21,840 --> 00:26:24,150
~ Right.
~ So, it is a really big job, then?
582
00:26:24,200 --> 00:26:26,150
~ Oh, yes. No, absolutely, yes.
~ Yes.
~ No, sure.
583
00:26:26,200 --> 00:26:28,950
~ I got to say, that is
exactly what I thought.
~ Righty ho.
584
00:26:29,000 --> 00:26:31,070
~ Bloody great.
~ Goody-good.
585
00:26:32,480 --> 00:26:34,430
I don't want to work on
Family bloody Fuck Up,
586
00:26:34,480 --> 00:26:36,430
~ or whatever it's going to be called.
~ Right.
587
00:26:36,480 --> 00:26:38,310
That's not what I thought
I'd end up doing.
588
00:26:38,360 --> 00:26:40,630
~ What did you think you'd end up doing?
~ I don't know.
589
00:26:40,680 --> 00:26:43,070
'Back outside, meanwhile,
as Head of Values,
590
00:26:43,120 --> 00:26:44,950
'Ian has made an executive decision
591
00:26:45,000 --> 00:26:46,750
'to be late for a meeting for once,
592
00:26:46,800 --> 00:26:48,510
'to offer Lucy some carrot cake
593
00:26:48,560 --> 00:26:51,270
'and listen to her talk about
her own job instead.'
594
00:26:51,320 --> 00:26:52,350
I don't have to do this.
595
00:26:52,400 --> 00:26:54,950
~ I could get a job behind a bar or something.
~ Well, yes...
596
00:26:55,000 --> 00:26:57,230
~ You know, or work in a garden centre.
~ Yes, no.
597
00:26:57,280 --> 00:26:58,990
Garden centre's good.
598
00:26:59,040 --> 00:27:02,470
I'd be really good at that,
too. No responsibilities.
599
00:27:02,520 --> 00:27:04,030
~ I've always wanted to do that.
~ No.
600
00:27:04,080 --> 00:27:06,230
Cos the thing with that is,
in summer you're outside
601
00:27:06,280 --> 00:27:09,190
~ and if it's raining or in winter,
you can drink tea all day long.
~ Yes.
602
00:27:09,240 --> 00:27:12,640
~ So, either way, you can't really lose.
~ Exactly. Yes, no.
603
00:27:15,200 --> 00:27:18,510
~ Thanks. That was really kind of you.
~ Well, no.
~ It was great.
604
00:27:18,560 --> 00:27:21,860
~ Yes, no. It looks nice.
~ Really good carrot cake.
~ Yes.
605
00:27:22,880 --> 00:27:25,230
~ Also, thanks for, you know, for listening.
~ Well, no.
606
00:27:25,280 --> 00:27:26,350
Helping me reason it out.
607
00:27:26,400 --> 00:27:29,070
~ It's kind of scary and exciting
all at the same time.
~ What is?
608
00:27:29,120 --> 00:27:30,630
It's one of those things, you think,
609
00:27:30,680 --> 00:27:32,670
~ "Why didn't I do it ages ago?"
~ No, wait. Lucy...
610
00:27:32,720 --> 00:27:34,830
~ Why has it taken me this long?
~ No, no, no, no.
~ What?
611
00:27:34,880 --> 00:27:36,870
No, Lucy, you can't do
this. You can't just...
612
00:27:36,920 --> 00:27:40,190
~ I mean, you're the sort of
person the BBC depends on.
~ Yes, I know.
613
00:27:40,240 --> 00:27:42,990
That's why I want to leave.
614
00:27:43,040 --> 00:27:45,830
'The BBC is facing mounting
criticism tonight
615
00:27:45,880 --> 00:27:49,470
'after it announced that Evan Davis
is to appear as a contestant
616
00:27:49,520 --> 00:27:51,750
'in the next series of
Strictly Come Dancing.'
617
00:27:51,800 --> 00:27:53,870
And she's, like, there's
going to be this new job.
618
00:27:53,920 --> 00:27:56,190
~ Do we really have to do this?
~ Yeah, welcome to my world.
619
00:27:56,240 --> 00:27:58,470
~ Basically, they'd like it to be you.
~ You mean, you?
620
00:27:58,520 --> 00:28:00,430
~ Me. Yes, I know. Yes!
~ Right.
~ Yes, I know. Me!
621
00:28:00,480 --> 00:28:02,910
Ian Fletcher, this is a bit of
an own goal for you, isn't it?
622
00:28:02,960 --> 00:28:05,270
The fact is, this would be
some kind of event, would it?
623
00:28:05,320 --> 00:28:08,710
Another example of both you and the
BBC being frankly a bit useless.
624
00:28:08,760 --> 00:28:09,950
Yes, hello.
625
00:28:10,000 --> 00:28:12,510
~ Anna has locked herself in the toilet.
~ In the toilet?
626
00:28:12,560 --> 00:28:14,150
Just say something, you stupid bitch.
627
00:28:14,200 --> 00:28:17,430
~ The fact is, I can't do this.
~ You are so going to kill here, girl.
628
00:28:17,480 --> 00:28:18,670
Thanks, Ian. That was great.
629
00:28:18,720 --> 00:28:20,960
No, I don't want this. I don't
want it. I don't want it.
56690
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