Original subtitles

(projector clicking)

(soft music)

(party goers chattering)

(Maggie vomiting)

- I'm so sick of being a walking list of side effects.

- At least you're not covered in a rash like last time.

Thank you for finally

makin' it out. - Hey, of course.

Good to see you guys.

- Good to see ya.

I have to believe that we're getting closer.

Do you wanna go lay down?

- I can't.

- Hey, kid. (laughs)

- You made it!

- Oh, nice place you got here.

I had to pay Sacagawea four blue beads

to help me find the place, but yes, the party can now begin.

- It is not that far out.

- From where I am?

I can't believe that Tom actually commutes in every day.

- Are you kidding?

He loves the extra reading time.

(Yvonne laughs)

- So, Maggie,

may this place give you the peace, quiet,

and inspiration to write another best-seller.

And Tom, may the tenure committee never get wind

of the fact that you have a private golf hole

in your backyard, lest they give this position

to somebody who actually needs it.

(party goers laugh)

Cheers.

- [Party Goers] Cheers.

(party goers chattering)

- I mean, I feel like I'll have a to do list

on my tombstone, but so far we're pretty happy.

- I can imagine.

See, this is why I have not moved in 15 years.

No, really.

What does one do with a third floor?

- We pretend it doesn't exist.

- I mean, I threw some of the old owner's furniture

up there, but I think we could've just

shared the house with them.

- Oh hi, Jeremy.

Thanks for coming.

- Maggie, could I steal you away for just a sec?

- Oh, we don't have anything to discuss yet.

- Actually, that's what I'd love to discuss.

- I'm not keeping any secrets.

- Okay, (chuckles) okay.

Listen, you know what I'm gonna say.

They just wanna see that you're on track to deliver.

A first chapter, a synopsis, an outline,

hell, they'll even take a good one-liner at this point.

- Here, there's everything.

- I can't buy you much more time, Maggie.

Now, you can always rewrite it later,

but right now you have to give me something

to create the illusion of progress.

- Then it sounds like you can write it.

- Maggie, they have made a major investment in you.

Yes?

- Fine.

I'll get you something.

- Thank you.

Congratulations.

It's really quite a lovely home.

- Well you must be feeling better.

- At least I have an appetite.

I think everyone had fun, don't you?

- Yeah.

That Jeremy's a force.

- I don't know what he expects me to give him.

I mean, it's not like I can write anything

when I'm this foggy.

Maybe I should just go off my meds

until I'm out of this funk.

- No, Maggie.

- Just 'til I get the synopsis out the door,

maybe a few chapters.

- It'll come.

All writers go through this.

- Will you still love me when the bank takes away the house?

- And they kick us to the street.

- Prove it.

(Maggie laughing)

- Hm. - Mm.

(blender buzzing)

(disjointed music)

(ominous music)

(waves crashing) (wind chimes tinkling)

(soft ambient music)

(water running)

- [Tom] There you are.

Why'd you put this guy on, huh?

- I need to tell you something.

- Okay.

What is this?

- Open it.

- Really?

- Looks like it.

- But how did we even--

- I think it was that night

that we finished unpacking and...

- Right, um, did you talk to Dr. Ambrose?

- I did some research but I wanted to tell you first.

- Wow. (chuckles)

This is a lot to take in, isn't it?

- Well it's not ideal, but it's partly

why we moved out here, right?

- Yeah, yeah.

- You don't seem excited.

- No, no, I am, I am.

I'm just, I'm just, processing.

I am.

- You could've fooled me.

- Oh no, I just...

I don't know.

Never mind.

- What?

- Well, I guess my mind just automatically goes

to what could go wrong.

You know, I want our children to be healthy

and if we go the traditional route

there's just statistically a higher chance of, you know.

- I don't know.

Are you saying you don't consider me healthy?

- No, I'm not saying that.

- Because I like my life.

I like who I am and I'm beginning to wonder if you do, too.

- That's not fair.

I love you and I love everything about you.

But I see it as,

if we could potentially protect them

from certain struggles, don't we owe it to them

to at least discuss that?

- It's not a hypothetical.

We're pregnant.

- And I'm saying that I don't want the baby.

I only wanna be sure that we are making this decision

for the right reasons and that it is a decision.

- I know we were gonna plan this out the right way

and even adopt, but now that it's happened

I know this is what I want.

- It scares me a little.

- Me, too.

But we're ready.

We're gonna be great parents.

- Okay.

Okay. (exhales)

Let's be excited.

- All right, we may be able to change your meds

to try and reduce the chance of birth defects,

but (sighs) it has taken us a long time

to find a combo that works.

Now we could go back to first generation antipsychotics,

category Cs, and even try ECT.

Now those have the most clinical evidence,

but I have to tell ya even if we do,

there is no risk free option.

- So I have to stay on something?

- Yes.

Maggie, with your history?

Yes.

- Can we at least lower the dosages?

- Look, it's a challenging situation, I know,

but do you remember where you were 18 months ago?

You may feel good now, but the pregnancy's

only gonna make it harder to stay in balance.

- But I've read that you can lower or taper off and be fine.

- And what have I said about online threads?

- I know, I just really think that there

have to be other options.

- Huh.

In some cases there are, but I'm afraid

that I can not recommend them for you.

(soft ambient music)

(footsteps pattering)

(piano music)

(ominous ambient music)

- There are already several risk factors for the child

since the pregnancy was unplanned

and you're still on medication.

What I'm saying is that we can greatly reduce

those factors by titrating off the medication

as soon as possible.

Usually I don't recommend the mother

be on anything stronger than a baby aspirin.

- How long has my wife been seeing you?

- I know Maggie's history.

- Well, I don't have the benefit of a medical degree,

but all it took was a quick search

to know that in a case like ours--

- It is my obligation to outline the serious,

possible, outcomes for the baby.

- I think we should listen to the doctor.

- I think that we've heard enough.

- I will let you two discuss this privately.

- Don't bother.

And I just have to say,

I think it's unbelievably irresponsible of you

to just wheel out stock medical advice

without factoring in her past.

- Mr. Schaeffer, I assure you I have taken everything

into consideration.

- That she tried to kill herself before

when she went off her meds.

Are you taking that into consideration right now?

- Yes.

- Then why would you try to scare my wife

into going off them again when you know that?

- The situation is completely different, Tom.

- All I can offer is my recommendation

based on actual experience.

- I don't even know how to respond to that.

- I am so sorry.

- No, not at all.

There'll need to be some more tests

in a couple of weeks so let me know what you decide.

You can get dressed.

- [Maggie] Thank you.

* Ooh ooh ooh ooh

- [Woman] Maggie!

* Ooh ooh

- (panting) Hey.

- I've been seeing you exercising every day.

- I try.

- [Neighbor] Do you want a glass of water or something?

- No, I'm fine.

I just, I just wanna go take a shower.

- Are you all right, dear?

- Hey, hey!

(disjointed music)

You should put your head between your knees.

Is Tom home?

Is Tom home?

Here, drink this.

- Thank you.

I'm feeling better.

- [Neighbor] Are you sure?

- Yeah, yeah, I just needed to take it easy for a minute.

(electric razor buzzing)

I promise.

- [Tom] You do?

- Yes.

You're totally right, I just worry about the baby.

- I love you so much.

And we can only control what we can control.

And the thought of losing you terrifies me.

- I'm not my father.

- I know that.

I know that you're not.

You just have to be extra careful, you know?

- Yup.

- I'll meet you in bed.

(somber music)

- So will you tell your mother about the baby?

- I haven't even thought about it.

Considering we're not speaking, I'm not sure how I would.

Tom says I don't even owe her my vote and I agree.

- Well, it could be an opportunity for you both

to forgive and potentially heal.

- I don't think I want my child

to have a relationship with her.

- I mean, yes, my book jeopardized her reelection campaign,

but she basically chose her seat over me

and I still don't forgive her for that.

- Do you regret sharing any of those details now?

- No.

She did ruin my father's life and my childhood

and her reaction made me realize that there was no point

in even trying to have a relationship.

- You think that's a fair perspective?

- [Maggie] She's the parent.

- No, I mean about your father.

- I think she had a lot to do with it, yes.

I mean, when you're with someone like my father

you have a responsibility to look out for them

and she never made any sacrifices for us.

I mean, I'm over wishing someone would send her

an envelope full of anthrax, but I still don't trust her.

- Now you know that I give you the benefit of the doubt

when you say things like that, right?

- That's why I say things like that.

- So have you thought through

whether you wanna change your meds?

I know it was weighing on you pretty heavily last time.

- It was.

- And? - No.

- Okay, well we'll just stay the course.

- I meant no, I've stopped taking them.

- Maggie, you know I can't support that.

- I don't need you to.

- Why don't we invite Tom in and we can talk

about this decision as well as its repercussions together.

- I do not give you permission to contact him.

He has made it very clear that he has

no objectivity on this issue.

- And you think you do?

You know, wanting to go off your medications

can itself be a symptom of the disorder.

- Are you questioning my motivation?

- I'm saying it can be difficult to see

why you make a decision from inside.

I mean, do you think it's possible

that telling me is your way of asking for my help?

- No.

- All right, I'm aware that I didn't give you many options,

but I would much rather you go on a lower dosage

or try a different medication than go off them altogether.

- I can't take those drugs without thinking

about what they're doing.

I was already on them too long as it is.

- Well then I need to go back

to seeing you two times a week.

Maybe more.

I mean, it's going to be critical

that we closely monitor your progress.

- Well, I can already tell that this commute

is going to be too much with my new writing schedule.

If anything, I'd like to scale back.

- Maggie.

The chance of relapse was high enough

with you just getting pregnant.

Going off your meds all but guarantees

that you will suffer a severe episode.

Now I need you to understand that.

- I'd like to call it a day.

(pensive electronic music)

What about The Severed Self?

And you can still keep An Exploration

of Selfhood in 19th Century Literature.

- Yeah.

Yeah, I like it.

Is it too gothic?

- You're writing about Jekyll and Hyde, right?

- Well, I have to include it,

but there are a lot of other texts

where the author or protagonist's duality

or division are central.

Like Wilde's Picture of Dorian Grey,

Tennyson's Idylls of the King, Jane Eyre.

I'm also looking at philosophical

and scientific works for context.

- I wanna say you did a lecture on this.

Something like how meeting your double

was considered an omen of death.

- Yes, that was my lecture.

Thank you for remembering it so clearly.

Mm-mm.

- I'm sure I was very distracted.

- Okay.

- I found a reproductive psychiatrist today.

Her name is Dr. Ellen Burke and she's very impressive.

- Okay, good.

Did you find her in the city?

- No, out here.

- Huh.

Even better.

Want me to go with you?

Okay.

Understood.

(ominous ambient music)

- Don't tell anyone else, though, okay?

It's probably too early to even have told you.

- Of course, yeah.

And you're feeling good?

- Yeah.

I mean, at first I was vomiting

like it was college all over again.

- I shoulda given you a buzz cut

I held your hair back so often.

- Stop. (chuckles)

But now I'm...

I'm great.

Tired, but great.

- Did you guys decide against adopting?

- It's still an option.

It's a big house.

- I guess I was more asking what shifted.

- Well, it was a surprise.

- That makes a lot more sense because you didn't tell me

you were trying.

- Yeah we weren't.

And I'm still on my meds so it's complicated.

I mean, we won't even know for six more weeks

if they've affected the baby.

- It sounds like you found out early enough

to be able to make an informed decision.

And no matter what happens, if it comes down to that,

it'll be for the best.

- What the fuck, Yvonne?

- No!

Then (scoffs) you'll be able to adopt.

Or plan it out with your doctor

and have a less stressful experience.

I'm just saying if it's viable or not

you can still start a family.

- So glad you came out for the weekend.

(somber music)

(Maggie knocking)

- [Yvonne] Come in.

(ominous music) (baby cries)

(doorbell rings)

(baby crying)

("Shucking and Jiving" by Lisa Papineau)

* Slowly I'm caught in the middle of *

* Slowly I'm caught in the middle of *

* And now we are burning alive

- Are you sure I can't take you later?

I'll make you breakfast.

- No, I gotta get back.

I have to memorize these lines.

Thanks, though.

- I liked having you out here this weekend.

- Me, too.

I must say, I don't mind having a country house.

We should do it more when I get back.

- Deal.

- Mm, will I see you before I leave?

- If you want. Text me.

- [Tom] Ready to go?

- [Yvonne] Yes, professor.

- I'm sweaty.

- I love you.

- Me, too.

- [Dr. Ambrose] I can't stress how critical it is

that you stay consistent with someone

who's been with you through your entire history.

* Like a river running wild she's away *

* Like a river running wild she's away *

- [Dr. Ambrose] Maggie.

- What?

* Away

* Ooh ooh ooh ooh

* Away

* Ooh ooh ooh ooh

- One last breath.

(Maggie exhales)

Good.

Nice and clear.

Have the bananas been helping?

- Yeah, I don't feel that nauseous anymore.

- Great, great.

It's my little trick.

- Before you go I'm gonna get my book for you.

- No, no, no, no, I'll buy it.

- Don't be silly, Skylar, it's just upstairs.

I just feel weird that you're gonna read it.

- It's you.

I wanna be on your turf.

I've actually meant to read it for years.

- Years?

You make it sound like it's been out forever.

(tense music)

- Hi. - Hi.

- [Henry] Are you Maggie?

- [Skylar] No, she's just upstairs.

I'm Skylar, a midwife.

- [Henry] I'm Henry.

I'm here for a piano lesson.

- I always wanted to learn an instrument.

- It's never too late.

I hope you don't mind.

I weaseled my way in.

- No, no.

Happy you're here.

- Thank you.

It'll be so great for the baby to be around music.

- That's what I thought.

I always was.

My dad would play for hours on end.

- Shoot for music.

This is the first lesson so no promises.

And no expectations.

- Oh well, yeah.

First since I was a little girl.

Hopefully something stuck.

- Babies aren't picky.

(piano music)

- Come again?

(Henry chuckles)

- We just need to tap back in to your muscle memory.

It's all in there somewhere.

- If it is it's pretty buried.

- I can't tell you how many of my students

lose interest after a few years.

- I stopped after my dad died.

It reminded me too much of him.

- Sorry to hear that.

- Piano's a good memory.

- I should warn you that I don't accept it

when my pupils don't practice.

If you don't put the effort in what's the point, right?

- Couldn't agree more.

- Great, well, I expect you know the drill.

Practice the song and do pages seven

through 12 in the workbook.

I'll see you same time next week.

- Same time.

(phone ringing)

Now he's calling the home phone.

(phone beeps)

Hello?

- [Man] Hello, I have Jeremy on the line for Miss Black.

(speaking in foreign language)

Jeremy, will you pick up?

I can't understand what this woman is saying.

(speaking in foreign language)

- [Jeremy] Maggie, are you there?

(speaking in foreign language)

Oh come on, cut the crap.

- Pardon?

- [Jeremy] You know, I guess I'd be avoiding me, too,

if I'd written the synopsis that you sent me.

Frankly, it's lacking.

- Maybe you should just talk to him.

- [Jeremy] There's a lot of good stuff in there,

but it's just not ready to (mumbles).

- I thought you said we just had to create

the illusion of progress.

- [Jeremy] Yeah, but I didn't expect this direction.

It's not in your voice, Maggie.

It's not what they want and it's not what's going to--

(phone beeps)

(notebooks banging)

(somber music)

(rain pattering)

- Do you wanna hold her?

- She's so tiny.

(Maggie chuckles)

(ominous music)

- We should put her back before we hurt her.

- One second.

- You need to put her back.

(baby squelching)

Tom.

(Maggie gasping)

- Maggie. (Maggie whimpering)

Sh, sh.

Maggie!

Sh, look, stop, stop, stop.

Sh, sh, sh.

(Maggie breathing heavily)

It's okay, it's okay, it's okay, it's okay.

Sh, sh, sh.

Hey.

- [Maggie] Hey.

- You feelin' better?

You scared me last night.

- I'm fine.

- What were you dreamin' about?

- It was nothing.

Kim?

I've got a load of towels in the washer.

Can you switch 'em to the dryer?

I'm gonna run upstairs.

- Yes, of course.

- You were screaming.

- Stop exaggerating.

Tom.

- What's up?

- Why did you bring that up in front of her?

- It was just a dream.

I didn't think it would embarrass you.

- Well it did.

I don't want everyone knowing the details

of my private life.

- Well I guess I don't equate Kim with everyone.

- She practically works for half the town.

- I don't think she's the type.

- Then you're naive.

I'm sorry.

Jeremy really pissed me off and I'm taking it out on you.

- That's fine.

He's an asshole.

- I just don't need the added pressure

on top of everything else.

- It's really hard to start a book,

especially when the expectations are so high.

- Intellectually I understand that,

but every other part of me just wants to punch a wall.

I'm going to sleep.

(pensive music)

(phone buzzing)

Hello?

- [Woman] Hi, may I speak with Miss Black?

- Speaking.

- [Woman] This is the clinic calling with results

from your screenings.

- Hi.

- [Woman] So I see here that your tests

did not show any signs of abnormalities.

- My AFP levels?

- [Woman] Normal.

- So there aren't any signs of--

- [Woman] The tests showed no irregularities, ma'am.

Can I go ahead and get you set up for another appointment?

(suspenseful music)

- It's a healthy baby!

- I knew it!

I'm comin' in.

(waves crashing)

- Tom?

Tom, you awake?

Tom, you awake?

- [Tom] Hm?

No.

- I can't sleep.

- Try your left side.

They say that's the best.

- Tom.

Tom.

(Tom grunts)

(ominous music)

- One more breath, and breathe out.

Good.

Good.

You can also take a warm sea salt bath

with lavender at night to help you

get into a meditative state.

- So it's pretty normal then?

- Oh yes.

Everybody has sleep disturbances at some point.

And there is one more thing we can do.

Use your hands, not your stomach muscles to get up.

- What are you doing?

(Yvonne laughs)

- We are hiding your clocks.

- Why?

- To take the pressure off.

I want you to allow yourself to connect

with the internal rhythm.

- Okay.

I'll try anything.

(tense electronic music)

- [Tom] Where is my alarm clock?

- I bought you a coffee.

- I'll have to take it with me.

- It's gonna get cold.

- Maggie, you are so sweet, but I don't have time.

- Aren't you going to ask how the appointment went?

I thought you wanted to be more involved.

- I have a meeting with the dean in, like,

I don't even know how many minutes

because there are no clocks.

Maggie.

Maggie!

(Tom grunts)

Of course I wanna know how it went.

I'll call ya after the meeting.

(piano music)

- You haven't been practicing.

- No, I haven't.

I've been writing.

- I'm disappointed.

- My writing's a little more important.

Don't take offense.

- Why don't you take the rest of this hour to practice

and we'll meet up again next week.

- Wait, can we at least talk?

My husband's been working a lot recently

and I've just been bouncing around this house.

I mean, I am paying you for this time.

- And I'm teaching you a valuable lesson.

- So fucking dumb.

- Language.

(ominous music)

- Tom.

Tom. - Hm?

- You can throw your own shower, right?

- What?

- Baby shower.

- I don't know, Mags.

I'm sleeping.

- Is it weird if I throw my own?

No one's offered.

I mean I guess I don't see anyone anymore.

- You can do whatever you want.

- That's what I think, too.

When Yvonne gets back.

Tom.

- [Tom] Huh?

- I'm horny for you.

- (grunts) Again?

I'm so tired.

- Come on. - Maggie.

(Tom whimpering)

- I thought I was gonna love this part of the pregnancy.

(couple grunting)

(Tom chuckles)

What's all this?

- Baby shower invites.

- Oh, right.

You sure you'll be up for it?

- I'm having a shower, Tom.

- And I would not try to stop you.

Nor could I.

It looks like you've made half of them already.

- Where are you going?

- Work.

- I thought you had today off.

- Well, I don't have any classes,

but I'm gonna go do some writing.

- Aw.

I had so much fun with you last night.

I was kind of expecting to have more fun with you today.

I mean, we have this big house at your disposal.

Why don't you work from home?

- I would, but I think I have to meet with Kelly.

- Who?

- One of my thesis advisees.

She's helping me with some of her research.

I'm sure I've mentioned her to you.

- Not that I remember.

- Well, she's a big help.

- Mm.

I could be a big help.

- (chuckles) Okay.

You have your own work to do

and that is not the kind of help that I'm talking about.

(ominous music)

- Maggie?

- Paul!

What a wonderful surprise.

Did you stop by to give me a lesson?

- That I did.

No, I texted Tom.

He didn't tell you?

- He's in the city working on his book.

- Ah, got it.

Yeah, I was driving down from Boston

and figured I'd stop in on my way home.

- Glad you did.

- You look amazing, as usual.

- Stop, I feel like an elephant.

- Were you really playing golf.

- Yeah, I was taking a break.

But I'm terrible.

- Feet shoulder distance apart.

Very good.

Okay, center of the club face should line up with the ball,

and swing through.

(club crunching in grass)

- I think my stomach's in the way.

- Maybe.

But, um...

Okay, if you just keep your head down

and keep your eye right on the ball,

this way you're gonna see the club make contact.

And then your follow through.

(club thuds into ball)

(Maggie chuckles)

There it is.

- I think I shacked up with the wrong professor.

(Paul chuckles)

- Yeah, I'm sure that Tom would love

to help you with your swing.

In fact, maybe you shouldn't even mention our session.

- I won't if you don't.

(ominous ambient music)

(Paul laughs)

I could fill a pool with that and swim around

until I was all sticky with pulp.

- Does being pregnant make you that thirsty?

- Being pregnant makes you that everything.

(Paul exhales)

Do you remember when you taught me to waltz?

- Of course I do.

When we were all at Ed Quinn's house.

- I'm using it in my new book.

- Oh you are, are ya?

So what, I'm a character now?

- Highly fictionalized.

Do you wanna come upstairs and read it?

- No.

I should really let you get back to work.

I am sure I've helped you

procrastinate enough already today.

I really gotta get back to the city.

(suspenseful music)

- It's safe.

(Paul grunts)

(couple breathing heavily)

- Mags?

(keyboard clicking)

There you are.

Why don't you have the light on?

I didn't even know that you were home.

(keyboard clicking)

Maggie? - Yeah.

- What are you doing?

- Writing.

- Oh.

How's it comin'?

- Quickly.

- Well I'm really proud of you for stickin' with it.

- I'm kind of on a roll if you could just...

- Stay on your roll.

(pensive music)

(woman whispering)

Sorry, I know you don't like interruptions,

but I heard that babies need food.

- You have perfect timing.

I can't sit here anymore.

What if we go to the city?

I'm craving a massive burger from that place in The Village.

- Maggie, my thesis students are coming today, remember?

- Oh shit, that's today?

All right, well I'll just go to the grocery store

and get stuff for burgers

and maybe sweet potato fries or something.

- Mags, we talked about this.

Kelly's a pescatarian.

We're having grilled salmon and salad.

Are you feeling okay?

It's early enough I can call and cancel.

They would understand.

- No, no, it's pregnancy brain.

I just forgot they were coming.

I mean, you've got it covered.

You even thought to ask about dietary restrictions.

- All right.

Do you have a salad dressing preference?

- Yes, yes.

Don't use a bottled one.

Olive oil, salt, pepper, some herbs, balsamic.

You know, why don't I just make it

because I don't have a recipe

and the ratios have to be right.

So I'll just make it.

Or you can make it if that's easier.

- Maybe you should go walk on the treadmill or something.

I think you've been cooped up in here a little too long.

- [Maggie] Yeah.

What time are they coming?

- One.

- Yeah, okay.

Great, I have time.

I just have a piano lesson at 11.

(piano note dinging)

- [Tom] Where's Henry?

- I don't know.

- [Tom] I thought I'd get the chance to finally meet him.

- I must have messed up the date.

I feel like he would've told me if he was gonna cancel.

- [Tom] Well, you can play for me.

- No, I've gotta get ready for your students.

- [Tom] Oh, come on.

I'd love to hear what you've been working on.

- Don't put me on the spot, Tom.

(doorbell rings)

- [Tom] Come on in.

Did you have any trouble finding the place?

- [Kely] Nope.

Jack has a car.

- [Jack] Yeah, it's a super easy trip.

- [Tom] Mags!

- [Kelly] Your home is (mumbles).

(ominous music)

(Maggie thuds)

- [Tom] Maggie.

Maggie.

What happened?

Why are you up here?

- Nothing, I slipped.

- [Tom] Did you hit your head?

Let me see.

- I'm fine, just help me up.

(ominous music)

That's my research for the baby.

- Fuck.

Fuck.

Maggie.

- [Maggie] What?

- How long has it been this bad?

- All pregnant women nest.

- No, if this was nesting the baby's room

wouldn't be practically empty.

- [Maggie] I'm planning.

- Just stay up here and rest.

I'm gonna cut them short.

- I don't see why.

- I want you to stay up here and rest

until we can talk about this, okay?

Maggie, please acknowledge me.

My students are downstairs, okay?

- Okay.

- [Kelly] You could layer in.

- Mm-hm, mm-hm, it's perfect.

That'll be great for the end of the chapter.

Good work.

- [Kelly] Thank you.

- Hi.

- Oh my gosh.

Miss Black, I am such a huge fan.

It's amazing to meet you.

I'm Kelly.

- It's nice to meet you, too.

- Hi, Jack Mallory.

- I'm sorry I didn't come down and greet you earlier.

The little one's already making be late for things.

- Shouldn't you be upstairs resting?

- I'm fine.

You guys hungry?

So what's your thesis on, Kylie?

- It's Kelly.

- It's all right.

I'm writing about the Brownings.

Do you know their work?

- In half I seem to recognize some trick

of mischief happened to me.

God knows when.

In a bad dream perhaps.

- Child Roland to the dark tower came.

- Very good.

- A poem of imagination's revenge.

- I hope that's not what Tom taught you.

I'd say it's more the agony of the literary quest

and the dissatisfying nature of ultimate achievement.

- Yikes.

I hope that's not what success has taught you.

- I can see why he likes you.

He has a thing for precocious students.

- Maggie.

- What, am I embarrassing you?

You should know he used to look at me

the way he looks at you.

Granted you're not knocked up yet.

That seems to put him off.

- Maggie, you don't know what you're saying.

You're manic.

- I know exactly what I'm saying.

You just don't wanna hear it.

- All right, that's enough.

- Oh come on.

I know how easy you were to seduce.

Almost as easy as Paul.

You guys know Professor Foley, yeah?

- What are you talking about?

(ominous ambient music)

- Paul and I had sex while you were at school

presumably fucking her.

- How am I supposed to deal with that?

- How am I supposed to deal with this?

(fists bang) (dishes rattle)

- You promised me.

You made me a promise!

- Look, I swear we didn't do anything.

- [Jack] Thanks for lunch.

- Maggie?

We need you to come downstairs.

There's some people who'd like to speak with you.

- What have you done?

- Ma'am, I'm Officer Callahan

and this is my partner Officer Rose.

Do you mind if we ask you a few questions?

- Of course.

- Your husband said that you haven't been

feeling yourself recently.

Is that right?

- I'm fine.

I think Tom may have overreacted.

- Well, we have to respond to every call.

- Of course.

- Have you been feeling anxious or irritable recently?

- No.

- What about this afternoon?

- Well, this afternoon I found out that my husband

has been sleeping with one of his students

and I told him that I slept with his best friend

so naturally there were some heated exchanges,

but I'd say we share the responsibility.

- I didn't sleep with my student.

- Sir.

Do you feel that friends or family members

want to do you harm?

- No, not physically.

- Not physically.

What do you mean?

- Well I think that calling you was meant to scare me.

- I see.

Have you been experiencing suicidal thoughts?

- No, I have no intention of hurting myself

or anyone else, and I do not take the situation lightly.

I'm sure Tom has filled you in on my history.

- Is there anything else you want to tell us?

- Only that I'm so sorry you were dragged into this.

- Mr. Schaeffer, your wife seems fine.

She doesn't meet any of our criteria

for further intervention at this point.

- That's it?

You only asked her a couple of questions.

- Well, like I said, she doesn't meet any of the criteria.

- She's gone off her meds.

- It's not illegal to discontinue your medications, sir.

- I know that.

I mean that it's critical that she get medical oversight.

My students, they were here.

They could attest to her behavior.

- You can apply for a commitment hearing

which will take place 10 days after you file.

At that time you can have witnesses testify

and introduce other evidence, but I have to tell you,

Mr. Schaeffer, that unless your wife

has threatened you, herself, or anybody else with violence,

the court won't see a compelling reason

to involuntarily commit.

- Well, I can't just stand here while she gets worse.

- Your complaint will be logged

and if there's any call for us to come back to the house

the officers will have everything on file.

Otherwise there's nothing else for us to do today.

All right?

- Good evening, ma'am.

- Don't ever do that to me again.

(ominous ambient music)

(Maggie breathing heavily)

- [Tom] Good morning, Kim.

- [Kim] Oh, good morning, Mr. Schaeffer.

- [Tom] I have to leave the house to go to court.

I'll probably (mumbling).

(Kim gasps) - I'm in here.

- I'm sorry, I didn't realize.

- It's fine.

- I'll start downstairs, yes?

(doorbell rings)

- Come in.

What are you doing here?

- You haven't answered any of my calls,

any of my texts, any of my emails.

- [Maggie] Sorry, I've been busy.

First I was planning my baby shower

and now I'm actually planning a garden for spring.

- [Jeremy] Well, they're done waiting

for your manuscript, Maggie, and frankly so am I.

- Waiting?

- They're pullin' out.

- But I have it all ready for you.

- You have what ready?

- I deviated from the original direction

but I think they'll like it.

You were totally right about my first draft.

I scrapped that altogether.

What you're holding there is mostly fiction.

I mean, there's a hint of my creative non-fiction style,

but it's definitely a novel.

As I was saying, I've just been so busy.

You know, with the little one I wanted

to get the book out of the way so that when she got here

it could be completely about her.

I mean, don't get me wrong, I love writing,

but I plan on being 100% focused on being a mom.

I much preferred it when my dad was around,

I mean when he was around.

- Maggie, this is actually very good.

- Oh good.

I mean, it needs editing, but I've just

been so plagued with, oh did you get your invite?

- Hm, the what?

- [Maggie] To my baby shower.

- Oh yes, yeah, I did.

- I made them all by hand.

But that's all taken care of now so I've moved on

to landscape design.

I've been doing a lot of research online

and I just have so many ideas

for how I can improve the garden.

I'm thinking an English garden,

rustic and homey, not too manicured,

but impeccably well designed.

I just want a magical world for my little baby to wander in,

if that makes sense.

- It's really all here, isn't it?

- Yeah of course it is.

Except for the epilogue.

I kept trying things, but they either were

too reductive or not enigmatic enough

or just plain derivative.

I thought I wanted to see where they were in 15 years.

You know, the fallout, how they've changed,

how they haven't changed,

but I just think that's overdone, right?

- Does Tom know that you're almost finished?

- I don't know and I don't care.

But I do have drawings I made of the garden

if you wanna see them.

- I'd love to see them, I really would,

but I think that we should really nail down

this epilogue first.

- I'm just thinking about how I could fit it in

and I just do have so much going on.

- I get that, I get that, but if we get

the epilogue out of the way then you got more time

to focus on the garden, right?

- Okay, here's what we'll do.

I will write out my top three choices

and then I will give them to you

and then you can sort through them

and decide what you like best.

- Why limit yourself?

Hm?

Try for five.

- Hi, Duncan.

- [Neighbor] Maggie.

Hey, Duncan, why don't you give us a second, all right?

- Oh, did he have to pee?

Oh, don't worry, Duncan,

I'm leaving now! - Hang on a second, hang on.

- Oh, so, I came over to take a dip in your pool,

which was very nice of you to offer.

I wish I had taken more advantage of it this summer,

but it was cold and I don't think you heat it.

So I just came inside.

I love the clawed feet.

I wish we had a tub like that in our house.

I'm fine.

- You just got escorted home naked.

What is it gonna take?

- I'm trying to keep our baby healthy.

So I was having a bath.

So I have some hormones flying around.

So what?

- Why don't we sit down with Dr. Burke

and come up with some kind of plan

to get us to a healthy birth.

- So you can ambush me again?

I'm not gonna help you lock me up

so that you can start your life with someone else.

- What are you talking about?

I am trying to get you help so we can be a family!

No, please don't.

- Don't follow me!

(ominous ambient music)

- [Tom] She's sleeping now.

I'll bring her by in the morning when she wakes up.

Thank you for pulling strings.

(waves crashing)

(floor creaking)

(upbeat electronic music)

- I could make you some tea.

- No thanks.

- Well.

I could make toast.

- I'm fine.

(phone buzzing)

- Hey, what's up?

(Tom chattering)

Hold on a sec, I'm not near my calendar.

It's my agent.

(ominous ambient music)

(suspenseful music)

- I'm sorry, but this card was declined, too.

Who's Tom Schaeffer?

- My husband.

Here, try this one.

- Traveling from somewhere?

- Why do you need to know that?

- Maybe my manager can help you.

(diners chattering)

(ominous ambient music)

- I thought you were resting.

I didn't wanna wake you.

Did you eat?

- I wouldn't have come here if I had any other place to go.

- Eat.

- I just need to stay for a few days

'til I get some clarity on my situation,

maybe talk to your lawyer.

- I wish you'd told me.

- Why?

- I know we don't have the relationship

that either of us envisioned, and I want you to know

that I regret how I handled things.

- I only wrote that book so you'd understand

what it was like for me.

- Well, I didn't necessarily agree

with your view of our family or even sometimes

your version of events.

Maybe if your timing had been different

and there hadn't been so much attention

we could've talked it out, but--

- You really don't get it, do you?

I shouldn't have come.

- No, no, Maggie, wait.

What I meant to say was, I'm sorry.

- I didn't come here to guilt you.

I just need a place to stay.

- And you can't go home?

- It's not that I can't.

Like I said, I just need to stay here

'til I get clarity on my situation.

Everything's just happening all at once

and I just need some quiet to figure it out.

- And Tom?

He can't help you figure things out?

- No.

No, he's part of the problem.

He is the problem.

- Why do you think that?

- Has he called you?

- What difference would that make?

- He's looking for us.

I'm sure of it.

He has his own motives.

- And if he found you?

I don't think it would be as bad as you imagine.

- You don't know him.

- When you were 18 months old

your father convinced himself that I was trying to drug him.

When I was out of town taking depositions

he sent the nanny home, who he thought was one of my spies.

He put you in a little blue snow suit

and took you up to the house in Connecticut.

When he got there he didn't trust

any of the food at the house.

He thought that somehow I'd gotten out there, too.

So he put you in the crib, grabbed his fishing pole

and went out to catch dinner.

You were in that snow suit in that crib

for almost two days.

I know it sounds ridiculous now, but...

I've spent so much time thinking I did something wrong,

that I could've done something better.

I somehow could've prevented it.

If I didn't have a career or I was home more

or if I'd only paid more attention to him.

I blamed myself for not being able to make him better.

I have come to realize that neither of us are to blame

and I hope you come to realize that, too.

- I'm almost finished with my second book.

I think you'll like this one.

I really think you will.

- [Elizabeth] Get some sleep.

- No!

Mom!

- Come on.

(ominous music)

It's a great facility and it's right down the road

so I will get to see you a lot, okay?

What else do you need?

All right, let's go.

(suspenseful music)

I'm gonna give them a call,

let them know that we're on our way.

Who would you like to meet us there?

Burke?

- You can call her but she won't know who I am.

- Are you saying you've never met her.

Okay.

I will call Ambrose then.

- I'm not seeing him anymore.

- Then who are you seeing?

- Just Skylar.

- Who is that?

- She's my midwife, she comes to the house.

- Fine, give me her number then.

- I don't have it.

- God damn it, Maggie!

I'm trying to help you.

- I know.

I know, Tom.

I love you.

I don't know what's going on with me.

- It's okay.

It's okay.

- Just...

I just can't let them take her.

- [Tom] Maggie.

Maggie, stop.

(Tom thudding down the stairs)

(ominous music)

- You're shaking.

- [Skylar] You need to rest.

- [Maggie] Can you go check on Tom?

- Of course.

- Shh.

Shh.

It's okay.

It's okay.

Everything will be fine.

It's okay.

Shh.

- I'm so sorry.

- I am, too.

And we can hold off on the hospital for now,

but I need to be more involved moving forward, yes?

- Okay, I can do that.

- All of this could've been avoided

if we had just talked about it.

- Well you never gave us a chance to.

- I was just so worried about you and the baby

that I didn't even wanna go down that path.

- Let's not fight anymore.

- I love you, Magpie.

I'm off to work.

(suspenseful music)

(phone beeping)

- [Tom] You have reached Dr. Schaeffer,

please leave a message at the tone.

- Tom, please call me back.

I'm worried.

Please call me back.

(phone ringing)

Tom?

- [Jeremy] Mag, no, it's Jeremy.

Listen, I just got off the phone with the publisher

and they are in love with your manuscript.

They expect it to be bigger than the last one,

which means get ready to pump the fuck out of it.

We're all havin' an impromptu celebration

in the city tonight.

Can you make it in?

Mag?

(phone beeps)

(suspenseful music)

- Tom.

Tom.

Dad?

(Maggie gasps)

(somber music)

(Maggie crying)

(Maggie sobbing)

(piano music)

- What's going on?

- [Woman] No one's answering.

(Yvonne knocking)

(door rattles)

- Maggie?

Maggie.

- I think I need help.

(water splashes)

- [Yvonne] Maggie?

(machine beeping)

Maggie?

- Is the baby okay?

(baby crying)

Hi.

Hi.

(baby crying)

Hi.

Shh.

(somber music)

Yeah.

("She's the Lucky One" by Victoria F. Beaumont)

* Away

* Ooh ooh ooh ooh

* Away

* Ooh ooh ooh ooh

* No one knows where she goes

* Only eagles miles high

* I can try and bring her back

* But she's gone

* She's in a world of mortal lows *

* Now she's gone, where no one knows *

* Like a river running wild

* She's away

* She's gone away

* Ooh ooh ooh ooh

* She's gone away

* Ooh ooh ooh ooh

* When times have faded to the bone *

* Fluctuated with her soul

* Doesn't matter where she's gone *

* She's away

* Oh she's the lucky one

* Ooh

* She's fallin' in love

* She's fallin' in love

* She's the lucky one

* She's the lucky one

* She's fallin' in love

* She's fallin' in love

* She's the lucky one

* No one knows where she goes

* Only eagles miles high

* I can try and bring her back

* But she's gone

* She'd drive the poison out of love *

* Now she's gone, where no one knows *

* Like a river running wild

* She's away

* She's gone away

* She's fallin' in love

* She's fallin' in love

* She's the lucky one

* She's gone away

* She's fallin' in love

* She's fallin' in love

* She's fallin' in love

* She's the lucky one

* She's fallin' in love

* She's fallin' in love

* She's the lucky one

* She's the lucky one

* She's fallin' in love

* She's fallin' in love

* She's the lucky one