Original subtitles

No... Not this.

'In pursuit of Massimiliano D'Asburgo...'

'...Napoleon III's French troops land in Mexico, 1867.'

'The war between the French oppressors and the partisans...'

'...liberators of Mexican hero Benito Juarez, was fierce and bloody.'

'The chaos of war brought opportunists of every type...'

'...arms dealers, gamblers, spies, smugglers...'

Fire.

Come on, Cocaine.

Let's get out of here!

Wait for me.

That was too much. Cocaine! Get up!

France!

Garter Colt

Lieutenant Martin and Adjutant Roger...

France is counting on you to stop the arms smugglers.

Unfortunately, it's the sixth time we've counted on you...

And you haven't found a damned thing.

Watch the border between here and Texas...

The weapons are coming from there.

And try not to get caught by the rebels.

But, if it should happen, I've already arranged for someone to help you.

Now go. And look out for ambushes.

Yes, sir.

And remember, France is watching you.

So this time, at least, I'm warning you, don't get caught!

"I'm warning you, don't get caught!" "I'm warning you, don't get caught!"

You always get caught.

Come on. You know the way.

You won't escape this time, even if you paid the bounty.

I wonder how Drugs will kill them?

You should never call him Drugs, call him, General.

He never used to take drugs. -No?

It happened when the French killed his last horse.

I guess it was the pain? -It's because he bought Cocaine...

The horse he has now... how was he to know the horse was an addict?

Who? The horse?

Right. So he drugs the horse today, he drugs the horse tomorrow...

So he ended up picking up the habit as well.

We've seen them all in this revolution!

Yes, let's drink on it.

Don't finish it. Leave me some.

Wake up!

Bastard son of an idiot. Look!

You let the two Frenchmen get away.

Fool.

Whose ears can I cut off now?

Stop snoring.

Ramon! See if you can hang these two for me.

I apologise for yawning, it's the emotions.

We should've passed the border, we must be in Texas...

Far from the Mexicans and those damned gangs of mercenaries.

Here.

Just the thought of encountering Red's gang.

Spades again! Such bad luck.

It's those Frenchmen again. -The ones always get captured?

Right, and this time the General's gang got them.

The General's gang isn't like ours, Red...

We kill the French! -Hold on.

Not like that.

Stop!

Where are you going? -Ford city... it's you again!

Can we get a ride? -We can't go on anymore.

Climb aboard. Why don't you quit the army?

You're just not cut out for it.

Deep down, war's great, Lieutenant.

You know when we crossed Red's territory...

I was so worried about you.

Shoot, but be careful not to him them.

Roger.

Stop! I'll kill him.

They're still shooting!

I think we should do something. -What?

What can you do when you don't know what to do?

Red, who says you have to do it this way?

A rifle shot and it's over.

I'll show you how much better something hand-made is!

Jose!

Stupid, they killed you. Imbecile!

Damn your pistols!

Thank you, I owe you my life.

My compliments, you're a great shot.

To defend yourself. -Thank you.

Come on, let's go.

Careful with that pram.

He's very delicate.

Hang him! -But why?

You Mexicans are always starting revolutions.

But it's the first time!

We're against violence, us.

Let him go.

You can't hang me. -Be quiet.

Be quiet! Anyone who raises their voice is a revolutionary.

We're peaceful folk, us! Pass me that rope.

We want Texas to stay free and democratic.

Who was that? -It came from over there.

Get him! What are you waiting for?

What do you want? It wasn't me.

Calm down...

We're only going to hang you.

I'm not Mexican, ask the Sheriff. I'll be your spy!

I swear, i'll be your spy.

Let's make a nice tie for him.

Now the rope. -Whatever you need!

Thank god for Elvira, she's got everything under her skirt.

Four dollars, friend. -We'll pay you tomorrow.

Sheriff! This is unjust! Let me go!

Is this okay?

The General.

He just gets fatter.

Always crazier!

You go that way. You over there.

Dirty bastard, I saw you what you did!

Don't move.

You hanged one of our men.

You'll face the same fate, bastard.

Wait a minute. -What is it?

I'm the Sheriff here. -The Sheriff!

Do you want to square up against me and the United States?

If we're going to square up, then square up against my men!

Miguel, a spy.

A death worthy of a traitor.

I came here looking for that French officer.

I'm sorry, friend. It was an accident.

Who would've thought it.

It's not that bad. A strong man like you.

You've got blood to lose.

General, why don't you and your gangs stay in Mexico for your revolutions?

Here in the United States, the government doesn't like revolutions.

It's a peaceful country and we don't like violence, is that understood?

Don't get upset, Sheriff, we all make mistakes.

Twenty cents for the hanged man's rope.

It's a bit tough.

You'll see, it will help you find love.

$3000, for the capture of Billy, dead or alive.

Rosie, Red's still waiting for your answer.

Go away. For my tastes, in this village...

You're all too vulgar. -Scram!

Twenty cents for the hanged man's rope.

Go on, take it Rosie, It will help you find love.

Hear that, uncle? Will you give me twenty cents?

Balls.

My name's Rosie.

My name's Jean.

Jean.

Rosie.

I'll raise you. Twenty dollars.

I'll see you, and I'll raise you forty.

I'm in.

Me too.

Play.

How many cards?

Two.

One.

One.

And you? -One card.

$100 for me. -$100!

I'll see you.

I'm good for $500.

I'll see you, lady.

I won't. -Me neither.

I have three tens, and you? -Just three spades.

What a...

Madam.

"What luck", the gentleman meant to say.

I met your aunt in Paris, a few weeks ago...

A pleasant lady. -Unfortunately, I know only too well.

Not everyone gets the chance to be Margerita Gaultier's niece.

The celebrated lady of the Ca... -Please, McCarol...

I don't like talking about it.

Sheriff.

Sheriff.

Where have you hidden the Frenchman?

Do you know?

Then buy me a drink.

Get away from there. You'll wake the boy.

Long live the revolution.

Long live life.

Damn it.

I miss every time!

It's impossible!

I'm neutral.

Emanuelito.

Carlos, it's me!

Jean.

Stupid, stop shooting. It's me.

Did I frighten you? -Shit.

It's a good thing I freed you, you missed me completely.

We'll split up here.

Then we're agreed, we'll meet at Devil's Forest.

Okay. -Good luck.

You too!

Come on, faster!

You made my mother scrub like a gypsy when she was your servant.

Now it's your turn. Push!

Push! -Cut it out, Red.

Our mother is dead.

And what does that mean?

Red! -Someone's coming, look out!

It's Carlos, one of the General's men.

Have the weapons arrived? -One part is already here...

They'll be transported to Devil's Forest tonight.

The General already knows.

He'll get the get the rest of the weapons tomorrow morning.

Good, I'll tell him.

Are you sure they'll come here...

...with the weapons for the General? -Yes, sure, Red told me.

If we pull this off our mission will be complete.

What will you do when they stop slaughtering each other here?

Will you return to France?

No, I like this country. Then there's Rosie.

What will you do? -I don't know...

I'll go somewhere, it's all good and bad in this world.

What does that mean?

It means, after a while, I'll get bored and move on.

They're here.

Devil's Forest is still far away.

We're late. Here, some drugs for you as well.

Come here, quick.

We're here!

Here are the weapons.

We're late, General. -The weapons?

Aren't they in the wagon?

Damned idiots! You were carrying empty crates!

Good morning, madam.

Are you looking for a parrot, or its owner, by any chance?

I never look... i find!

Rosie.

Beautiful.

Mine.

You will be mine.

Jean.

Jean.

Jean!

Rosie.

Help.

Help.

Jean.

You still love me!

Let go of him.

I see you really love animals.

No, you're mistaken, I don't care about them at all.

What do you love then?

Nothing.

Are you from around here? Are you Mexican?

No.

I'm here to play, like you.

How did you end up here? -I was bored of Paris.

Everyone knows about it now.

All I ever did was yawn among my aunt's camellias.

Have you ever been in love?

My horse's bath is over.

Goodbye.

I'll give you a rematch at poker.

Honey.

It always happens to you.

Poor love.

That Red sure has his ways!

But he's so strong!

It must be the power of his madness.

I'll deal.

You, lady? -Cards, two.

One.

Dealt.

One card for me.

'Madamoiselle has three aces...'

He could wake up, see the parrot...

...and have such a fright.

I'll pass.

I'll pass as well.

Have you heard, madam? It appears your aunt Margherita...

...is in love with a certain Alfredo at the moment.

She's been lead astray.

Poor lady, it appears she's afflicted with an insistent cough.

Why don't you send her to me tomorrow morning...

I'll give her a once over. -It's pointless...

She'll die anyway.

In time!

One. -Two...

Three. -Four.

Well, we sure aren't in any gentleman's club...

Go away.

Doctor!

Who is it? Where am i?

Doctor, I'm not well. -Me too... What's wrong with you?

I'm full of remorse. -It's your lungs, show me your tongue.

Go away, Elvira. You're in great shape.

Sorry, honey.

I'm here, i warned you!

Don't you dare! -Here he is.

It's Red. -The usual weekly robbery.

Poker.

Out with the dollars.

And what do you feel, sonny?

Just a few dollars more, doctor.

My pocket watch.

Hey, beautiful, what have you got for me?

Look out, Red...

It's an ambush.

What is it? -Help.

Help. A fire.

It must be the Madison ranch.

Jean.

What a lovely fire.

Who knows?

Benito Juarez would put it out magnificently.

Benito Juarez is an enemy of France. -Yes, but he's so brave.

So am I. I'm going to put out that fire.

You could die.

Of course, I'm a soldier. -No, my love.

I'm coming with you.

The weapons. Good.

Good, the weapons are here. Good, good...

Quick, let's get this on the wagon before the Sheriff gives us more trouble!

Hurry, Red.

Greetings, Sheriff. -Hello everyone.

You two, from Red's gang, what are you doing up there?

We're watching you searching for the fire.

Shoot first, then think. Idiots!

This fire's from Red!

Idiot. -You're the idiot, it was your fault.

What?

I was coming from the right.

This story about a fire feels like a trap.

Where's the rest of Red's gang?

Let's see what's happening in the village.

Hold it. Hold it!

Faster.

Come on, quick.

Get a move on.

Damn it. The gold!

Who took it?

Guercho, what happened to the gold?

Answer me. Where did you put it?

Talk!

Someone's coming.

Sheriff.

You also like midnight walks?

My aunt Margherita loves camellias.

I prefer simpler flowers.

Madamoiselle, have you seen anyone come past here?

Yes, a Mexican. He was wearing a mask.

I was so scared. What would we do without you, Sheriff?

Sheriff...

May I give you my garter as a token of my esteem?

Thank you, it will be a dear reminder...

I'll put it in my collection.

You have to have a hobby to survive around here!

Carlos.

I should've known.

Who else could it be but a lunatic like you?

Okay...

Okay, i surrender.

You almost killed me.

You're a good shot.

They're right, in the village. -Why?

You know what they call you?

Garter Colt.

Garter Colt.

Come on, turn around.

Nice job with the bank.

Nice job.

I'm sorry, what job?

Explain yourself. -Don't play dumb, I recognised you.

Yes? Okay, we'll split it.

Half? No, I want all of it.

What? All of it!

Are you crazy? And what will I get in return?

I could marry you, then you won't end up like your aunt.

Marry me? -Also.

Who wants you? -As you wish...

But you'll have to go to Red, and give him his sacks of gold.

All that gold in exchange for all the weapons.

Tell me, are you French? -Yes.

I figured.

But what the devil brought you out here?

I really don't know. And you?

Perhaps it's the same devil.

Well, Red?

So they stole four sacks of gold from you?

Right.

I let you rob my clients! A real elegant swindle...

That works! And you?

Go to Hell! Do you expect me to believe that?

It's the truth.

I'll never believe that. -Take his pistol.

And now, banker...

It's my turn to settle up. -Sure, brother...

Two against one.

Let me go. Let me go!

I'm begging you. Enough!

Hot, isn't it? Banker!

Pull me out.

Let me go, I'm begging you. I'm suffocating.

Enough.

Let me go.

Got a cough, banker?

Hot, isn't it? Have you got a cough?

I beg you, let me go.

Dirty traitor.

This is what happens when you double-cross us.

You're the only one who knew...

...that the General was collecting the weapons at Devil's Forest.

Jack of Hearts and the Queen of Hearts.

Beautiful.

Spades, spades...

Spades, spades...

Emanuelito, you're back.

And Carlos? -That lunatic has him prisoner.

Who? -Red, evil... Red!

Red.

Damn it.

On the day of the Lord, I will come...

I will come to punish the Princes and the King's children.

And all those who wear strange clothes.

So you're with the French.

You laugh...

But not for much longer.

The French will regret ever setting foot here.

Why did they come here?

We'll kick them off our land, we'll throw them back in the sea...

All of them.

You know I feel sorry for you, dying for cause that isn't yours...

That's unjust. -Pedro, put a sock in it.

Calm down.

That's enough.

Look at the state of you, peasant.

Peasant! Peasant, my ass!

Continue... Continue undressing.

Do you think I'm here to amuse you? -Then what do you want?

Tell me. -I want the weapons.

I pay well.

How much?

Guercho.

The weapons have a new buyer. Load the rifles on the wagon...

Then get the provisions... And don't forget the beer!

Traitor! Those guns are for the revolution!

Imbecile, this is business, it has nothing to do with politics.

Traitor!

Traitor.

Traitor!

No, not here.

Easy!

Do you want to see my rifle collection? -I don't think so.

I'm sure they're interesting, but I don't think it's the right time.

Don't you agree?

You must be thirsty.

I only have water.

Come on, quick.

The gold. -Let's go.

It's all here.

Load it up as quick as you can. -The weight might slow us down.

Luckily, we still have quite an advantage.

Who are you shooting at, imbecile?

Red's gang is coming! -Take it, your gold!

Come and get your rifles. Come on, move it!

They're going to attack us. -Red's gang is coming.

What are you waiting for? Come and get your rifles.

The rifles... and the gold!

So they're the ones who robbed the bank!

Come.

Stop, don't shoot. They're on our side.

Four men coming from the east. -Quick!

Damn it! They moved the lake! They could've warned me.

My love.

Bullet. -Here's one.

It's lipstick, idiot! -Great! I'll give you a kiss.

Now...

I have to return to the General.

Right, the war.

You know I'd forgotten.

Then you promise?

I promise not to cheat anymore, and you have to come back soon.

If I don't help poor Massimilian how will he survive?

Massimiliano is young, like us...

And handsome, even if he is a little pale.

I saw him at a parade, he was with Empress Carlotta.

She's very small. Shy...

Dressed badly, like a Belgian.

I looked at her in love.

As you look at me now? -Me?

Assuming!

Quiet...

That song is bad luck. -So what? It's so beautiful.

It might be the only thing that remains of this war.

Will you wait for me?

Carlos.

We're out of ammo. -Quiet!

Where are you going? They'll shoot you.

Can you imagine? A lady?

This is insane.

Out of the way, I can't see anything.

Where are you going?

Red, it's not going well.

And the others? -All dead.

Retreat!

Come here.

The dead are dead so let's tidy this place up.

If there are any injured, nurse them...

They'll be good for next time.

Let's go home.

What are you waiting for? You can steal a sheep at least!

Wait for me, Red.

Hurry up.

Don't be foolish!

Stop it.

I'll make you say yes.

If won't do it for yourself, do it for that poor kid...

You don't even know him! And I don't know him either!

And who knows how he ended up here?

You want him to die here? -Don't you dare!

Why not? I'll show you.

Idiots!

What if I cut your head off? -Coward...

You always cut my dolls! You were always the naughty one!

You're crazy.

Go away. Away!

What are you doing?

Will you decide! I'm asking you nicely.

No, I love someone else. Besides, we make a bad couple!

Go away.

You stop that! There's a child present.

Will you decide? -You decide!

Be quiet, you. This is an adult's conversation.

Yes, but my life's on the line because of your foolish deeds!

Let's see if this helps you to decide more quickly.

You're crazy!

Hey, Red, I'll stick a bullet in your forehead.

Get away from here. Get back.

And keep your hands up.

I'll set you straight!

Rosie.

Jean.

You took your time!

I want to know where the French outposts are.

Tell me! -Greetings General, I'm back.

Hello, Drugs! -Be quiet.

About time.

You took your time.

Dirty bastard.

Well? -Well.

The weapons.

Talk. -I'm talking.

Well? Are you going to tell me where the weapons are?

What? You're asking me?

Who else?

I'd ask Red.

Damn you!

Enough.

When you stop laughing, will you stop playing guessing games!

Where are the weapons?

Start talking.

What about Red? -He sold the weapons to the French.

Is that right?

Don't let it get to you, everything's real and nothing's real.

Things are changing all the time. Is it worth beating yourself up over it?

Stop.

It's not worth it.

Stop or I'll have to shoot. -Who?

He always messes up.

Who knows what I'll do now?

I'm so sorry.

I really am.

That's how it goes.

That's how it goes, sonny.

It's always been the way.

I'll shoot Red, and this time...

I promise you, I won't miss.

Au revoir...

From the General.

Adios.

I'm looking for Red.

Where the hell is he hiding?

I made a promise, and I'm going to keep it.

He's dead. -Dead?

Why? Damn him!

And Carlos?

Damn it...

I wouldn't have missed this time.

Don't be afraid, friends, the war's over.

And Carlos?

And Carlos?

For three aces, three tweets.

For poker, four.

And don't forget...

Seven... Seven for tweets for a colour.

Subtitled by Merlin www.cultfilmsubs.com

April 2011 For Hocico - Thanks for the help!