Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:01:39,016 --> 00:01:40,642
Cam: Still drinking?
2
00:01:46,023 --> 00:01:47,816
Abbie, you still drinking?
3
00:01:56,033 --> 00:01:57,534
Sixty seconds!
4
00:02:07,461 --> 00:02:14,301
Prokofiev chorus:
J“ peregrinus expectavi
5
00:02:14,384 --> 00:02:21,767
j“ pedes meos in cymbal/s j“
6
00:02:26,897 --> 00:02:28,065
Thirty seconds!
7
00:02:36,323 --> 00:02:43,372
J' peregrinus expectavi
8
00:02:43,497 --> 00:02:50,712
-j' pedes meos in cymbal/s j“
-cam: Are you deaf?
9
00:02:54,925 --> 00:02:57,636
Fuck!
10
00:03:00,097 --> 00:03:01,598
Ten seconds. Hurry up.
11
00:03:08,146 --> 00:03:09,314
Huh?
12
00:03:10,565 --> 00:03:11,692
Time!
13
00:03:15,904 --> 00:03:17,030
Oh, well.
14
00:03:22,619 --> 00:03:24,871
See if you don't quit this time.
15
00:03:24,955 --> 00:03:27,374
It smells like
a fucking fart bag over here.
16
00:03:32,087 --> 00:03:33,964
All right.
17
00:03:34,047 --> 00:03:39,052
Round six in three, two, one...
18
00:03:39,136 --> 00:03:42,973
Three minutes.
19
00:03:58,739 --> 00:03:59,823
Hold still.
20
00:04:01,199 --> 00:04:03,493
I said hold still.
I'm trying to get focus.
21
00:04:08,039 --> 00:04:10,208
You spill one drop,
I'm calling it.
22
00:04:13,462 --> 00:04:16,089
Looks like it's dribbling down
your chin. I'll disqualify you.
23
00:04:16,173 --> 00:04:19,593
I will kick you out unless you can
learn how to drink like a fucking human.
24
00:04:19,676 --> 00:04:21,678
I am a human.
25
00:04:22,429 --> 00:04:23,513
Cam: You sure?
26
00:04:25,223 --> 00:04:27,476
Where'd you get these?
27
00:04:27,559 --> 00:04:29,269
Abbie:
Dallas got 'em from arin bechdel.
28
00:04:29,352 --> 00:04:32,981
Arin bechdel got 'em from,
I don't know, some sales guy at work.
29
00:04:33,064 --> 00:04:34,441
And then I got 'em from Dallas,
30
00:04:34,524 --> 00:04:36,693
so I gotta beat 'em all
before I gotta give 'em back.
31
00:04:36,777 --> 00:04:38,695
Aren't you afraid of arin?
32
00:04:38,779 --> 00:04:40,655
No. Why would I be?
33
00:04:42,032 --> 00:04:43,867
I think you're afraid of arin.
34
00:04:45,076 --> 00:04:46,912
Trying to beat these?
35
00:04:46,995 --> 00:04:49,456
No, I'm just trying
to flip the world.
36
00:04:49,539 --> 00:04:51,750
I think you can only do it
in San Francisco.
37
00:04:51,833 --> 00:04:55,462
Just go up, down,
and the quarter pipe four times,
38
00:04:55,545 --> 00:04:58,590
slide rail halfway down the pipe,
39
00:04:58,673 --> 00:05:02,886
jump over the right side,
Ollie out, land on the cage.
40
00:05:02,969 --> 00:05:05,263
I only did it once by accident,
41
00:05:05,347 --> 00:05:09,726
but... the whole level,
it flips upside down.
42
00:05:09,810 --> 00:05:12,562
The screen freezes
and shakes for a little bit.
43
00:05:12,646 --> 00:05:14,582
Now, they're gonna fix this before
the game comes out next year,
44
00:05:14,606 --> 00:05:16,566
but it is a good glitch.
45
00:05:17,818 --> 00:05:19,736
- Trying to find the glitches?
- Yeah.
46
00:05:19,820 --> 00:05:22,280
Because you can't
really beat this game.
47
00:05:25,492 --> 00:05:27,869
It's the new fucking shadowgate.
That game's impossible.
48
00:05:27,953 --> 00:05:29,704
It's gonna take you weeks.
49
00:05:29,788 --> 00:05:32,040
- I sa.. I saved kal torlin.
- Huh.
50
00:05:32,123 --> 00:05:35,043
- Escaped all three towers.
- What about this one? Huh?
51
00:05:35,126 --> 00:05:37,087
Ah. I escaped the asylum.
52
00:05:37,170 --> 00:05:38,880
Whoa.
53
00:05:38,964 --> 00:05:40,215
Thirty seconds.
54
00:05:41,925 --> 00:05:43,093
Huh.
55
00:05:44,511 --> 00:05:48,265
Pac-man?
Says it's the arcade version.
56
00:05:48,348 --> 00:05:50,600
Yeah, I don't really like
the old games.
57
00:05:50,684 --> 00:05:53,395
- You don't like the old games?
- They're hard.
58
00:05:59,276 --> 00:06:00,443
Ten seconds.
59
00:06:02,404 --> 00:06:03,530
Come on.
60
00:06:05,240 --> 00:06:07,909
Four. Three. Two.
61
00:06:07,993 --> 00:06:10,412
One! Time!
62
00:06:10,495 --> 00:06:12,289
Whew.
63
00:06:12,372 --> 00:06:14,457
That was close.
64
00:06:14,541 --> 00:06:16,334
You gonna blow?
65
00:06:16,418 --> 00:06:17,794
You sure?
66
00:06:17,878 --> 00:06:19,421
I just have to pee.
67
00:06:19,504 --> 00:06:22,215
Oh. There's a bathroom
right over there. Go for it.
68
00:06:22,299 --> 00:06:25,176
- No. You'll disqualify me.
- Try it.
69
00:06:25,260 --> 00:06:27,429
- You're gonna make me start all over again.
- Try it!
70
00:06:46,281 --> 00:06:47,449
Ohh!
71
00:06:52,871 --> 00:06:57,375
Round seven in three, two, one...
72
00:06:57,459 --> 00:06:59,061
- Just one second.
- No, there's no breaks.
73
00:06:59,085 --> 00:07:02,422
No, come on. There should be at least,
like, a minute between glasses.
74
00:07:02,505 --> 00:07:05,383
That's against the regulations.
What, are you trying to quit?
75
00:07:05,467 --> 00:07:08,428
- Well, can I have some ice, then?
- That dilutes the lactose.
76
00:07:08,511 --> 00:07:10,847
Three, two, one.
77
00:07:12,140 --> 00:07:13,183
Drink up!
78
00:07:24,110 --> 00:07:25,862
What are you doing?
Are you packing?
79
00:07:28,448 --> 00:07:30,492
Going to uncle Ronnie
and Ronnie's.
80
00:07:30,575 --> 00:07:34,204
Working on the new compound.
Everyone's gonna be there.
81
00:07:34,287 --> 00:07:36,581
- Who's "everyone"?
- Everyone.
82
00:07:36,665 --> 00:07:37,791
Even joao?
83
00:07:39,417 --> 00:07:41,670
- Well, can I come?
- Sure.
84
00:07:41,753 --> 00:07:44,214
- Mom's gonna be there.
- She can do your laundry.
85
00:07:48,051 --> 00:07:50,095
What did you say?
86
00:07:50,178 --> 00:07:51,304
Nothin'.
87
00:07:54,808 --> 00:07:55,892
You know what?
88
00:07:57,727 --> 00:07:59,664
I think I'm just gonna take
this whole box set over
89
00:07:59,688 --> 00:08:00,939
so everyone can watch it.
90
00:08:01,022 --> 00:08:03,108
- Don't.
- Yeah.
91
00:08:03,191 --> 00:08:06,403
We'll let 'em see
"the quitter's guide to quitting".
92
00:08:06,486 --> 00:08:08,613
- I didn't quit.
- Sure? Huh.
93
00:08:08,697 --> 00:08:10,865
Let's start from the top.
"Mr burger challenge".
94
00:08:10,949 --> 00:08:12,701
Only completed eight of the ten.
95
00:08:12,784 --> 00:08:14,470
- Yeah, I wasn't hungry anymore.
- Let's see here.
96
00:08:14,494 --> 00:08:16,913
We got "the catnip
cigarette challenge".
97
00:08:16,997 --> 00:08:19,791
- I swallowed some.
- Oh, sure. You didn't quit.
98
00:08:20,041 --> 00:08:21,441
Then we got...
Oh! Yeah, yeah, yeah.
99
00:08:21,501 --> 00:08:23,086
"Full volume headphone blast."
100
00:08:23,169 --> 00:08:25,046
You only got through
two of hammett's solos.
101
00:08:25,130 --> 00:08:27,424
I told you I didn't want songs
longer than eight minutes.
102
00:08:29,926 --> 00:08:32,470
You know what would have been
the ultimate challenge?
103
00:08:32,554 --> 00:08:34,681
You gettin' a fucking job.
104
00:08:34,764 --> 00:08:36,808
Wait. You quit that one, too.
105
00:08:36,891 --> 00:08:38,101
That's right.
106
00:08:38,184 --> 00:08:41,896
Old Cortez throws a hot dog at you,
and you 90 running home.
107
00:08:41,980 --> 00:08:44,649
- Could've paid the rent.
- Oh, you could've paid the rent?
108
00:08:46,317 --> 00:08:48,695
Man, I know mom
pays for everything.
109
00:08:50,447 --> 00:08:51,948
Where'd you hear that?
110
00:08:55,326 --> 00:08:57,787
Where'd you hear this, huh?
Was it your boyfriend Dallas?
111
00:08:57,871 --> 00:09:00,999
- She gives the landlord a cheque every month.
- Says who?
112
00:09:01,082 --> 00:09:03,043
And she takes it out of
dad's savings account.
113
00:09:04,794 --> 00:09:07,881
Dad's savings?
He didn't have shit when he left.
114
00:09:07,964 --> 00:09:09,424
Mom should have told you that
115
00:09:09,507 --> 00:09:11,593
when she fucking evicted you
from the basement.
116
00:09:11,676 --> 00:09:13,511
- Hey, I left on my own.
- Oh, really?
117
00:09:13,595 --> 00:09:15,781
When she found you down there
writing love letters to him?
118
00:09:15,805 --> 00:09:17,932
- They weren't love letters.
- "Dear daddy sicko"...
119
00:09:18,016 --> 00:09:20,036
- He wasn't a sicko!
- You tell that to the court, motherfucker!
120
00:09:20,060 --> 00:09:23,438
There was a silly misunderstanding.
That's all.
121
00:09:23,521 --> 00:09:26,357
Dad was broke when he left.
Nothing there, idiot.
122
00:09:27,525 --> 00:09:28,651
Fuck!
123
00:09:31,279 --> 00:09:33,156
Oh, shit. Here we go.
124
00:09:35,408 --> 00:09:37,744
What, did I hurt yourfeelings? Huh?
125
00:09:40,163 --> 00:09:41,523
What's wrong with you?
126
00:09:42,707 --> 00:09:44,876
Huh? What happened to you?
127
00:09:46,044 --> 00:09:47,504
You got ten seconds, bitch.
128
00:09:47,587 --> 00:09:51,883
Nine, eight, seven, six, five,
129
00:09:51,966 --> 00:09:54,761
four, three, two...
130
00:09:55,845 --> 00:09:57,013
Time!
131
00:09:58,348 --> 00:10:00,016
Oh, that was fucking close.
132
00:10:01,142 --> 00:10:03,853
Whew! Half a glass left, man.
133
00:10:04,813 --> 00:10:06,439
That's a big deal.
134
00:10:06,523 --> 00:10:08,858
You might actually complete
a challenge.
135
00:10:13,988 --> 00:10:16,616
Mom used to always
race us to the bus stop.
136
00:10:16,699 --> 00:10:20,328
She always let you win, and I
always would come in last place.
137
00:10:20,411 --> 00:10:23,665
- Why did she do that to me?
- What are you talking about?
138
00:10:23,748 --> 00:10:25,708
Dad used to always
let me beat him.
139
00:10:26,543 --> 00:10:28,461
What?
140
00:10:28,545 --> 00:10:30,755
You... you asked
what happened to me.
141
00:10:37,679 --> 00:10:40,223
I... I was just kidding.
I was just kidding around. Geez.
142
00:10:40,306 --> 00:10:42,016
Come on. Let's go. Round eight.
143
00:10:42,100 --> 00:10:43,994
- Three, two, one. Here we go!
- No, wait. Are you gonna blow?
144
00:10:44,018 --> 00:10:45,603
Hold on! Are you gonna blow?
Stop it!
145
00:10:45,687 --> 00:10:47,665
I'm getting a fucking bucket.
This is not official.
146
00:10:47,689 --> 00:10:49,774
Time has not started yet.
Wait right there.
147
00:10:49,858 --> 00:10:51,794
I'm gonna go in the basement,
get a bucket, and a fucking mop.
148
00:10:51,818 --> 00:10:53,903
You move,
I will fucking kick your ass.
149
00:10:58,908 --> 00:11:00,326
No fucking cheating either.
150
00:11:50,501 --> 00:11:52,101
Cam: Don't tell
janitor Jim I stole this.
151
00:11:52,170 --> 00:11:54,631
Not that he understands
a word anybody says anyway.
152
00:11:54,714 --> 00:11:56,507
Abbie: Did you put the key back?
153
00:12:02,764 --> 00:12:05,433
Cam: You're in luck.
Giving you a five-minute break.
154
00:12:06,517 --> 00:12:08,519
Found you a little present.
155
00:12:08,603 --> 00:12:10,313
Abbie: Where'd you get that?
156
00:12:10,396 --> 00:12:13,274
- Cam: Apartment 417.
- Abbie: You stole it?
157
00:12:13,358 --> 00:12:15,944
Cam: So? Bunch of fuckin' nerds.
158
00:12:16,027 --> 00:12:19,364
Look. It's your
little kid pac-man game.
159
00:12:19,447 --> 00:12:21,449
And some fuckin' caveman.
160
00:12:21,532 --> 00:12:23,034
- No, that's Billy Mitchell.
- Hmm.
161
00:12:23,117 --> 00:12:24,786
Says he's got a contest.
162
00:12:26,788 --> 00:12:29,374
- Can I see it?
- Hundred thousand dollars.
163
00:12:29,457 --> 00:12:31,501
- Come on. Let me see.
- You want it? Grab it.
164
00:12:32,335 --> 00:12:33,920
Come on. Grab it.
165
00:12:35,046 --> 00:12:36,881
I call challenge break.
166
00:12:36,965 --> 00:12:38,341
I call disqualified!
167
00:12:41,261 --> 00:12:42,387
Hoo!
168
00:12:46,849 --> 00:12:49,852
- Says you gotta beat his record.
- What's his record?
169
00:12:49,936 --> 00:12:51,688
Couldn't get past level 256.
170
00:12:53,523 --> 00:12:55,900
This Mitchell sounds like you.
171
00:12:55,984 --> 00:12:58,319
"If you want to attach
your name to a record,
172
00:12:58,403 --> 00:13:00,613
"if you want your name
written in history,
173
00:13:00,697 --> 00:13:03,032
"you have to pay a price."
174
00:13:03,116 --> 00:13:04,492
Fuckin' homo.
175
00:13:05,743 --> 00:13:07,787
Cam, can I please see it?
176
00:13:07,870 --> 00:13:09,247
Beat 256. That's it.
177
00:13:10,456 --> 00:13:12,625
What would you even do
with $100,000?
178
00:13:13,668 --> 00:13:15,795
- I'd buy a jet.
- What?
179
00:13:15,878 --> 00:13:17,964
Or a boat. Go to California.
180
00:13:19,424 --> 00:13:22,176
You'd go from Michigan
to California on a boat?
181
00:13:22,552 --> 00:13:24,304
Yeah.
182
00:13:26,014 --> 00:13:28,016
Look at this.
Some Chinese kid with a bowl haircut
183
00:13:28,099 --> 00:13:30,643
named Jeffrey yee did it in 1982.
184
00:13:30,727 --> 00:13:32,812
Reagan even sent him a letter.
185
00:13:32,895 --> 00:13:35,398
Yee claims he videotaped it,
and then lost the tape.
186
00:13:35,481 --> 00:13:36,899
Fuckin' lame.
187
00:13:36,983 --> 00:13:40,028
You know, Dallas just got some
bootleg pac-man tapes sent to him
188
00:13:40,111 --> 00:13:41,487
from his uncle bodo in Nepal.
189
00:13:41,571 --> 00:13:43,740
- Maybe that's it.
- Oh, fuck that!
190
00:13:43,823 --> 00:13:46,534
Dallas is such a liar,
and you know it.
191
00:13:46,617 --> 00:13:49,037
No, he traded half
his two-headed snake for it.
192
00:13:49,120 --> 00:13:49,954
What?
193
00:13:50,038 --> 00:13:52,498
He traded half
his two-headed snake for it.
194
00:13:53,249 --> 00:13:55,335
Break's over, sweetchuck.
Back to the challenge.
195
00:13:55,418 --> 00:13:57,253
Where's that milk jug?
196
00:13:57,337 --> 00:13:58,921
No... what? No!
197
00:14:00,089 --> 00:14:01,924
Y... you said just eight baby bottles.
198
00:14:02,008 --> 00:14:03,944
That's not what I said.
Besides, I want the jug in the shot.
199
00:14:03,968 --> 00:14:06,405
We're making fuckin' art here.
You've gotta finish off that milk jug.
200
00:14:06,429 --> 00:14:08,556
- Where is it?
- No, you said specifically
201
00:14:08,681 --> 00:14:10,326
- it was just eight baby bottles.
- That's not what I said.
202
00:14:10,350 --> 00:14:12,494
- That was the finish of the challenge.
- You gotta finish all the milk!
203
00:14:12,518 --> 00:14:14,520
If you don't consume
all of the milk...
204
00:14:14,604 --> 00:14:16,484
- That's not what you said, cam!
- You heard me.
205
00:14:16,564 --> 00:14:18,149
- No, you said...
- That is the rules.
206
00:14:18,232 --> 00:14:19,877
- Yeah, but...
- _ "|3ut"
207
00:14:19,901 --> 00:14:23,279
Oh, look, there it is. Yes.
208
00:14:23,363 --> 00:14:26,282
Right, so you gotta finish
all the milk in the jug,
209
00:14:26,366 --> 00:14:28,177
and I don't care
how many bottles it takes you.
210
00:14:28,201 --> 00:14:29,928
- That's what I said.
- No, it isn't. You said...
211
00:14:29,952 --> 00:14:31,597
- That's exactly what I said.
- No, it isn't.
212
00:14:31,621 --> 00:14:34,874
You said as soon as like eight of 'em
are done, then that was it.
213
00:14:34,957 --> 00:14:37,186
- That's not what I said.
- And you can't even refill it. The top...
214
00:14:37,210 --> 00:14:39,420
That's not the rules.
The challenge explicitly stated
215
00:14:39,545 --> 00:14:42,131
if you don't consume all the milk
that was in the jug,
216
00:14:42,215 --> 00:14:43,591
then you lose.
217
00:14:43,674 --> 00:14:45,527
You can't just fill it
when the top is on already!
218
00:14:45,551 --> 00:14:48,054
You know what? Fuck it.
I'm gonna tell you one thing one time.
219
00:14:48,137 --> 00:14:50,074
- This is not right, cam.
- You have quit everything in your life.
220
00:14:50,098 --> 00:14:52,159
And you're finally getting close
to finishing a challenge.
221
00:14:52,183 --> 00:14:55,436
Look, I just topped it off.
Now, we got round eight.
222
00:14:55,520 --> 00:14:59,399
It's going to start
in three, two, one...
223
00:15:00,566 --> 00:15:01,609
Three minutes.
224
00:15:05,279 --> 00:15:06,406
Come on.
225
00:15:07,615 --> 00:15:09,492
We're all rootin' for ya.
226
00:15:09,575 --> 00:15:11,994
You got this.
227
00:15:14,956 --> 00:15:16,791
You quit?
228
00:15:16,874 --> 00:15:18,418
You can do it.
229
00:15:21,629 --> 00:15:23,131
There you go.
230
00:15:23,214 --> 00:15:25,216
Just put it to your lips.
231
00:15:25,883 --> 00:15:28,302
Suck it down.
You're almost there.
232
00:15:33,307 --> 00:15:35,268
Got it.
233
00:15:35,351 --> 00:15:36,519
That's good.
234
00:15:42,859 --> 00:15:44,819
Wh... whoa.
235
00:15:44,902 --> 00:15:47,071
It's pretty rotten.
You should smell it.
236
00:15:47,155 --> 00:15:48,364
No way. I smelled it already.
237
00:15:48,489 --> 00:15:50,741
It's definitely rotten.
That makes it better.
238
00:15:52,160 --> 00:15:55,037
This is... this is
above room temperature.
239
00:15:55,121 --> 00:15:57,248
That's good. Makes it more...
240
00:15:57,331 --> 00:15:59,000
Tasty. It's full-bodied.
241
00:16:01,627 --> 00:16:03,546
No. No. No way.
242
00:16:06,841 --> 00:16:08,259
Cam: Time's ticking.
243
00:16:08,342 --> 00:16:10,303
You just gonna quit again?
244
00:16:10,386 --> 00:16:12,638
Abbie: I'll be okay.
245
00:16:12,722 --> 00:16:15,016
Cam: You have no survival skills.
You know that? None.
246
00:16:15,099 --> 00:16:16,893
You barely survive on this couch.
247
00:16:18,478 --> 00:16:21,397
You still don't believe it? Huh?
248
00:16:21,481 --> 00:16:25,026
So this very specific numerical algorithm
which controls the date and time,
249
00:16:25,109 --> 00:16:27,296
which in turn controls
the motherboard of the computers,
250
00:16:27,320 --> 00:16:30,031
won't be entirely fucked
when everything flips to zeroes?
251
00:16:30,114 --> 00:16:32,634
You own one thing. It's not even
gonna work six months from now.
252
00:16:32,658 --> 00:16:35,661
There ain't no Nintendo
in the y2k.
253
00:16:38,873 --> 00:16:40,708
Don't fuckin' quit. All right?
254
00:16:42,210 --> 00:16:44,670
You are this close to finishing
255
00:16:44,754 --> 00:16:48,758
the first fucking challenge
you have ever fucking completed.
256
00:16:48,841 --> 00:16:51,177
Are you really gonna
fucking give up?
257
00:16:51,260 --> 00:16:52,762
Fucking serious, man.
258
00:16:54,263 --> 00:16:56,057
You got 60 seconds.
259
00:16:56,140 --> 00:16:57,433
You got this.
260
00:17:01,020 --> 00:17:02,855
Just suck that thing down.
261
00:17:04,398 --> 00:17:05,942
Put it in your mouth.
262
00:17:07,944 --> 00:17:09,320
Come on.
263
00:17:13,241 --> 00:17:14,325
Fuck, man.
264
00:17:17,787 --> 00:17:19,163
Thirty seconds.
265
00:17:24,168 --> 00:17:25,795
Abbie, you can do this.
266
00:17:27,630 --> 00:17:30,800
Twenty, nineteen, eighteen,
267
00:17:30,883 --> 00:17:34,136
seventeen, sixteen,
fifteen, fourteen...
268
00:17:34,220 --> 00:17:37,139
Fuck! Get the bucket!
Get the bucket!
269
00:17:41,269 --> 00:17:42,812
Cam: Fuck!
270
00:17:47,441 --> 00:17:49,485
I knew I should have borrowed
Jim's fuckin' tarp.
271
00:17:52,530 --> 00:17:54,323
Where's my fucking keys?
272
00:17:55,950 --> 00:17:57,618
Do we have any popsicles?
273
00:17:57,702 --> 00:18:00,371
Get up and get it yourself.
This challenge is over.
274
00:18:01,497 --> 00:18:04,000
I'm too sticky to get up now.
275
00:18:04,083 --> 00:18:06,002
We got any blue ones left?
276
00:18:08,504 --> 00:18:10,006
On the floor, mongo.
277
00:18:12,633 --> 00:18:14,135
Hit the streets, homeless.
278
00:18:14,218 --> 00:18:16,095
- Oh, but y...
- _ "|3ut."
279
00:18:19,015 --> 00:18:20,182
Fuck!
280
00:18:26,606 --> 00:18:27,940
One more challenge.
281
00:18:29,442 --> 00:18:32,278
One more final,
ultimate challenge.
282
00:18:33,446 --> 00:18:35,615
- You're not gonna just quit?
- I won't.
283
00:18:35,698 --> 00:18:37,283
You will.
284
00:18:37,366 --> 00:18:39,243
- I quit quitting.
- What?
285
00:18:39,327 --> 00:18:40,911
I quit quitting.
286
00:18:46,459 --> 00:18:47,585
Fine.
287
00:18:52,089 --> 00:18:55,509
One last ultimate challenge.
288
00:18:55,593 --> 00:18:57,946
Regulations still in effect.
You don't get off this fucking couch.
289
00:18:57,970 --> 00:18:59,096
Name it.
290
00:19:07,772 --> 00:19:09,774
What are you doing?
291
00:19:09,857 --> 00:19:12,193
Come on.
292
00:19:13,235 --> 00:19:14,236
Cam.
293
00:19:21,827 --> 00:19:24,538
_
294
00:19:25,998 --> 00:19:27,583
Fuckin' gross, man!
295
00:19:29,001 --> 00:19:30,878
Level256.
296
00:19:30,961 --> 00:19:31,962
What?
297
00:19:33,172 --> 00:19:35,132
You get past level 256.
298
00:19:35,216 --> 00:19:37,968
You beat that fucking record,
you fucking collect that money,
299
00:19:38,052 --> 00:19:39,595
you show up that caveman,
300
00:19:39,679 --> 00:19:42,014
and then you go live
with daddy dearest forever.
301
00:19:42,098 --> 00:19:44,767
Rules apply.
No getting off this couch.
302
00:19:44,850 --> 00:19:46,268
- Stretch breaks?
- Nope.
303
00:19:48,104 --> 00:19:50,064
- Can I lay down?
- No!
304
00:19:50,147 --> 00:19:53,234
You do not leave this couch
until the challenge is completed.
305
00:19:58,906 --> 00:20:00,116
Challenge accepted.
306
00:20:01,867 --> 00:20:03,369
Are you sure?
307
00:20:06,622 --> 00:20:08,624
Challenge accepted.
308
00:20:10,042 --> 00:20:11,168
Okay.
309
00:20:16,090 --> 00:20:17,800
Well, how long do I have?
310
00:20:17,883 --> 00:20:20,010
Till I get back.
311
00:20:20,094 --> 00:20:22,179
- Well, you coming back tonight?
- Nope.
312
00:20:22,263 --> 00:20:24,140
- Tomorrow?
- Who knows?
313
00:20:24,890 --> 00:20:26,434
Can I come with?
314
00:20:26,517 --> 00:20:28,144
Are you quitting already?
315
00:20:32,189 --> 00:20:34,066
I'm gonna take pity on you.
316
00:20:34,150 --> 00:20:35,710
I'm gonna give you
until new year's Eve.
317
00:20:35,735 --> 00:20:38,070
That's right, son.
You have until the y2k.
318
00:20:38,154 --> 00:20:40,281
- What?
- Mm-hmm.
319
00:20:40,364 --> 00:20:42,724
You're gonna stay on that couch
and you're gonna protect it.
320
00:20:43,743 --> 00:20:45,411
Fuckin' relax!
321
00:20:45,494 --> 00:20:47,163
Probably be done before tonight.
322
00:20:47,997 --> 00:20:49,540
You gotta tape it.
323
00:20:49,623 --> 00:20:51,625
Think you can handle that?
324
00:20:51,709 --> 00:20:55,004
Think you can aim this at the TV,
press the little red button?
325
00:20:56,297 --> 00:20:57,923
Gonna be able to
take care of yourself?
326
00:20:58,007 --> 00:21:00,087
Be able to keep in all
your pee-pee and your poo-poo?
327
00:21:01,969 --> 00:21:03,846
Where's my keys?
328
00:21:04,555 --> 00:21:06,915
- Where the fuck are my keys?
- Does Chuck e cheese deliver?
329
00:21:06,974 --> 00:21:08,476
Call fuckin' domino's.
330
00:21:11,020 --> 00:21:13,105
Goddamn it.
331
00:21:13,773 --> 00:21:16,150
I had two knives and a set of keys
on this fucking counter.
332
00:21:16,233 --> 00:21:19,069
Where's joao's knife,
and where's my fuckin' keys?
333
00:21:19,153 --> 00:21:21,822
- Did you fucking touch my keys again?
- No way, José.
334
00:21:21,906 --> 00:21:23,365
"José"?
335
00:21:24,825 --> 00:21:26,202
What you know about José?
336
00:21:28,037 --> 00:21:29,330
Aha!
337
00:21:31,665 --> 00:21:34,585
Huh? I'll tell you about José.
338
00:21:34,668 --> 00:21:37,546
José domingo. He's an old fisherman,
lived down in Mexico.
339
00:21:37,630 --> 00:21:39,715
Lived on the beach.
He fished all day.
340
00:21:39,799 --> 00:21:41,050
And you know what?
341
00:21:41,133 --> 00:21:43,987
What he didn't eat for lunch or dinner
at the end of the day, he sold off.
342
00:21:44,011 --> 00:21:46,806
And one day, along
come the white man. Yeah.
343
00:21:46,889 --> 00:21:49,225
American businessman
on Mexico vacation
344
00:21:49,308 --> 00:21:52,019
comes up to José and says,
"I got a suggestion for you.
345
00:21:52,102 --> 00:21:54,313
"Why don't you hire somebody
to do your fishing,
346
00:21:54,396 --> 00:21:57,024
"and somebody
to run that stand for you?"
347
00:21:57,107 --> 00:21:58,692
Old José gives it a try.
348
00:21:58,776 --> 00:22:01,278
Next day he makes three times
as much money.
349
00:22:01,987 --> 00:22:04,448
Here come that
American businessman again.
350
00:22:04,532 --> 00:22:07,243
He says, "José,
I got another suggestion.
351
00:22:07,326 --> 00:22:10,204
"You should hire
an entire fleet of fishermen."
352
00:22:10,287 --> 00:22:11,890
Next thing you know,
José's sitting up in that office,
353
00:22:11,914 --> 00:22:13,058
sitting behind a mahogany desk.
354
00:22:13,082 --> 00:22:15,209
He got a hundred employees
in his corporation.
355
00:22:15,292 --> 00:22:17,336
There 9040 years.
356
00:22:17,419 --> 00:22:20,714
All of the sudden, José's an old man.
He can barely walk.
357
00:22:20,798 --> 00:22:22,591
He decides
it's time for retirement.
358
00:22:24,176 --> 00:22:26,512
You know what he does?
359
00:22:27,263 --> 00:22:29,390
I asked you a question!
Do you know what he does?
360
00:22:29,473 --> 00:22:31,100
No. What? I don't...
What does he do?
361
00:22:31,183 --> 00:22:33,894
He goes and lives on the beach,
fishing all day,
362
00:22:33,978 --> 00:22:35,747
selling off what he doesn't eat
at the end of the day,
363
00:22:35,771 --> 00:22:37,189
happy as shit!
364
00:22:38,232 --> 00:22:39,608
And nobody bothering him.
365
00:22:46,782 --> 00:22:48,284
The American dream.
366
00:22:51,954 --> 00:22:53,289
Am I him?
367
00:22:57,585 --> 00:22:58,961
Get to fuckin' work.
368
00:23:01,005 --> 00:23:02,965
- I'll see you when you're dead.
- What?
369
00:23:06,510 --> 00:23:08,345
Don't take no shits on my couch.
370
00:23:10,639 --> 00:23:13,142
- Get to work.
- Are you coming back?
371
00:23:27,573 --> 00:23:30,117
Dallas. Hey,
I'm in a challenge emergency.
372
00:23:30,200 --> 00:23:32,536
Need you to bring over
a Chuck e cheese pizza, a large,
373
00:23:32,620 --> 00:23:34,371
a cherry cola, two-litre...
374
00:23:34,455 --> 00:23:37,958
I'll pay you when you get here.
375
00:23:38,042 --> 00:23:40,377
Hey, you know that pac-man tape
that your uncle gave you?
376
00:23:40,461 --> 00:23:43,255
- Hell yeah, dude.
- I need you to bring that with you, too.
377
00:23:45,674 --> 00:23:48,469
Oh, hey, and I need you to do
a secret knock when you get here.
378
00:23:48,552 --> 00:23:50,429
I need to make sure
it's not arin.
379
00:23:50,512 --> 00:23:52,222
Okay, here it goes.
380
00:23:58,646 --> 00:23:59,855
Do it back.
381
00:24:02,483 --> 00:24:04,026
That's not right.
382
00:24:07,780 --> 00:24:09,365
What, tomorrow?
383
00:24:11,241 --> 00:24:14,078
No, I.. I can't wait that long.
What are you doing right now?
384
00:24:17,039 --> 00:24:18,374
Hello?
385
00:24:19,667 --> 00:24:21,126
Hello?
386
00:24:21,210 --> 00:24:23,879
Well, why don't you deliver?
387
00:24:25,673 --> 00:24:28,509
No, it's not a birthday party.
It's a challenge.
388
00:24:28,592 --> 00:24:30,260
And it needs to be a delivery.
389
00:24:31,512 --> 00:24:33,847
Is this Brad matusak?
390
00:24:33,931 --> 00:24:35,391
Hey, this is abner harmeyer.
391
00:24:36,350 --> 00:24:37,434
Abbie.
392
00:24:41,188 --> 00:24:42,731
Hello?
393
00:24:55,119 --> 00:24:57,287
Dallas: Come on, dude,
open the door!
394
00:24:57,538 --> 00:24:59,039
Ssh-ssh.
395
00:25:01,375 --> 00:25:03,085
Do the secret knock.
396
00:25:03,168 --> 00:25:04,168
Dallas: Well...
397
00:25:10,592 --> 00:25:13,429
- Abbie: What was that?
- Dallas: I don't know. The Olympics song?
398
00:25:13,512 --> 00:25:16,557
Th... the fuckin' secret code?
399
00:25:16,640 --> 00:25:19,143
Whatever, dude.
Fuckin' jig is up. It's me.
400
00:25:19,226 --> 00:25:22,521
- Abbie: Just use the key.
- Dallas: Where's the key at?
401
00:25:22,604 --> 00:25:25,399
- Abbie: Same spot.
- Dallas: Where's the fuckin' same spot?
402
00:25:25,482 --> 00:25:27,234
Abbie: Think above your head.
403
00:25:27,317 --> 00:25:29,445
Are you fuckin' doing
Maya angelou shit or something?
404
00:25:29,528 --> 00:25:31,155
What the fuck are you saying?
405
00:25:31,238 --> 00:25:33,115
Abbie: I... it's just...
It's above the door.
406
00:25:33,198 --> 00:25:34,992
Dallas: Thank you.
407
00:25:41,248 --> 00:25:43,417
Don't gotta yell at me,
all pissed off and shit.
408
00:25:43,500 --> 00:25:44,811
Abbie:
It's always in the same spot.
409
00:25:44,835 --> 00:25:46,128
Yeah, like your ass.
410
00:25:46,211 --> 00:25:48,047
- Did you put the key back?
- Yeah.
411
00:25:48,130 --> 00:25:50,424
It smells like fuckin' mouth farts
up in here, dude.
412
00:25:50,507 --> 00:25:52,217
Abbie:
Where's the Chuck e cheese?
413
00:25:52,301 --> 00:25:53,761
Dude.
414
00:25:53,844 --> 00:25:56,180
Brian Pontiac told me that fuckin'
cam got footage of you
415
00:25:56,263 --> 00:25:58,223
like spewing milk
all over the place, dude.
416
00:25:58,307 --> 00:26:00,309
I wanna see that shit.
That's what I came for.
417
00:26:00,392 --> 00:26:03,270
- What fuckin' tape is it on?
- Just forget about that.
418
00:26:03,353 --> 00:26:05,457
I ain't gonna forget about it.
That's the shit I came over for.
419
00:26:05,481 --> 00:26:08,484
If I had my own hi-8 tape player,
I'd fuckin' watch it at home.
420
00:26:08,567 --> 00:26:11,987
But I still need the fuckin' tape.
Which one is it?
421
00:26:12,071 --> 00:26:14,239
- Just don't worry about it.
- It says "first drive".
422
00:26:14,323 --> 00:26:16,408
You got video of your first time
you fuckin' drove?
423
00:26:16,492 --> 00:26:18,452
One of 'em.
424
00:26:18,535 --> 00:26:20,496
How can you have multiple
first times you drove?
425
00:26:20,579 --> 00:26:21,579
It's...
426
00:26:22,790 --> 00:26:24,500
Multi-cam.
427
00:26:25,417 --> 00:26:28,712
Oh, shit. Is this your birthday
when you fuckin' cut your knuckle?
428
00:26:29,755 --> 00:26:32,132
- Does it say "15th"?
- Mm-hmm.
429
00:26:32,216 --> 00:26:34,301
- Yeah.
- We should fuckin' watch that, too.
430
00:26:34,384 --> 00:26:36,804
Well, dude, get your fuckin' ass up.
Here, help me find this.
431
00:26:36,887 --> 00:26:38,847
Abbie: I can't get up.
It's part of the challenge.
432
00:26:38,931 --> 00:26:40,909
Fuck the challenge. Put that
shit on pause for five minutes,
433
00:26:40,933 --> 00:26:42,184
just to help me find the tape.
434
00:26:42,267 --> 00:26:43,352
Abbie:
435
00:26:44,686 --> 00:26:46,206
All right, then I
fuckin' challenge you
436
00:26:46,271 --> 00:26:48,774
to get up and help me
find the tape.
437
00:26:48,857 --> 00:26:51,819
I can't do a challenge when I'm
already on another challenge.
438
00:26:51,902 --> 00:26:53,922
Jesus Christ. All right, then I
challenge you to challenge me
439
00:26:53,946 --> 00:26:56,824
- to challenge you not to get up.
- I don't even know what that means.
440
00:26:56,907 --> 00:26:59,511
Doesn't fuckin' mean anything. Just
get off the couch like a normal person.
441
00:26:59,535 --> 00:27:02,079
You're in this fuckin' challenge
vortex of retardedness.
442
00:27:02,162 --> 00:27:05,165
- Why don't you have the pizza?
- Fuckin' Brad matusak was there, man.
443
00:27:05,249 --> 00:27:07,409
I hate that dude.
Him and his little fuckin' butt-hole.
444
00:27:07,459 --> 00:27:09,979
He spilled chili cheese on my
work pants, didn't even apologise.
445
00:27:10,045 --> 00:27:12,285
- You shouldn't say that.
- Say what? "Little butt-hole"?
446
00:27:12,339 --> 00:27:14,383
- No. "Hate."
- Oh, sorry.
447
00:27:14,466 --> 00:27:17,928
I didn't mean to fuckin' infringe
on your sensitivity and shit.
448
00:27:18,011 --> 00:27:20,472
- Abbie: It's hot in here, man. I...
- No shit.
449
00:27:20,556 --> 00:27:22,933
Can you open this window for me
and prop it with something?
450
00:27:23,016 --> 00:27:25,352
- Jesus Christ.
- Could you, please?
451
00:27:25,435 --> 00:27:27,396
- Dallas: Here. Will this work?
- Abbie: Yes.
452
00:27:28,605 --> 00:27:30,691
Dallas: For fuck's sake, dude.
453
00:27:30,774 --> 00:27:33,277
Didn't realise I was
your fuckin' personal assistant.
454
00:27:37,948 --> 00:27:40,742
Dude, it smells ill. Where...
Seriously, where are you shitting?
455
00:27:40,826 --> 00:27:42,661
Abbie: Dude...
456
00:27:42,744 --> 00:27:45,289
And since there's no pizza,
would you just grab me
457
00:27:45,414 --> 00:27:47,958
one of my baloney sandwiches
from the kitchen, please?
458
00:27:48,041 --> 00:27:50,169
- That'd be great.
- All right. I'm on it.
459
00:27:50,252 --> 00:27:51,587
Yes, your highness.
460
00:27:55,048 --> 00:27:57,593
Man, I don't see
anything in here, dude.
461
00:27:57,676 --> 00:27:59,845
Well, did you look
in the microwave?
462
00:28:01,388 --> 00:28:03,599
- Did I what?
- In the microwave.
463
00:28:03,682 --> 00:28:05,160
I'm not looking in the microwave,
I'm looking in the fridge.
464
00:28:05,184 --> 00:28:06,870
- Some mother Hubbard shit.
- Well, check the microwave!
465
00:28:06,894 --> 00:28:08,145
Why would I... fuck.
466
00:28:09,146 --> 00:28:10,939
Your light's tweakin' out, dude.
467
00:28:11,023 --> 00:28:13,734
- It's my night-light.
- Night-light? It's an epileptic light.
468
00:28:13,817 --> 00:28:16,045
- Just leave it alone.
- I'm not gonna touch your light, dude.
469
00:28:16,069 --> 00:28:17,905
I ain't an electrician.
470
00:28:21,158 --> 00:28:22,951
- Did you find 'em?
- I'm looking.
471
00:28:24,995 --> 00:28:26,788
They should have
two holes in 'em.
472
00:28:29,666 --> 00:28:31,793
I'm iookin'.
473
00:28:31,877 --> 00:28:33,855
I need both of them, though.
I gotta ration 'em out.
474
00:28:33,879 --> 00:28:36,882
- Mm-hmm.
- What are you doing?
475
00:28:36,965 --> 00:28:40,135
Nothin'. I'm fuckin'
looking for your sandwiches, dude.
476
00:28:51,855 --> 00:28:53,148
I found it.
477
00:28:58,820 --> 00:29:00,530
That shit's hard as fuck, dude.
478
00:29:00,614 --> 00:29:02,842
- That's, like, an antique sandwich.
- There's just the one?
479
00:29:02,866 --> 00:29:04,368
That's all that was there.
480
00:29:06,119 --> 00:29:07,955
- What are those? Popsicles?
- They were.
481
00:29:08,038 --> 00:29:11,041
They're fuckin' like liquid
jolly ranchers now. Shit melted.
482
00:29:13,835 --> 00:29:15,796
Were you drinking the kool-aid?
483
00:29:15,879 --> 00:29:18,799
- I don't even like Berry blast.
- How'd you know it was Berry blast?
484
00:29:20,384 --> 00:29:23,512
I wasn't wheezin' yourjuice, dude.
Stop giving me that accusatory look.
485
00:29:23,595 --> 00:29:27,224
Well... did you bring the
two-litre cherry cola, at least?
486
00:29:27,307 --> 00:29:29,768
- Yeah. You got the money?
- I'll owe you.
487
00:29:29,851 --> 00:29:31,728
Fuck that.
488
00:29:31,812 --> 00:29:34,273
The shit ain't free, dude.
It's fuckin' 89 cents.
489
00:29:34,356 --> 00:29:36,233
Come on, man.
490
00:29:36,316 --> 00:29:39,194
I know you got a knife in the couch.
Just give me that. I'll trade you.
491
00:29:39,278 --> 00:29:41,256
- Man, I don't have a knife.
- I know you got a knife.
492
00:29:41,280 --> 00:29:43,240
Just fuckin' trade me that,
and we're even Steven.
493
00:29:43,323 --> 00:29:46,201
- I got no knife.
- All right, then show me the money.
494
00:29:46,368 --> 00:29:49,329
Fuckin' show me the money,
fuckin' Jerry Maguire style.
495
00:29:49,413 --> 00:29:51,873
Look, soon I'm gonna have
a lot of money.
496
00:29:51,957 --> 00:29:53,917
I'm gonna have, like, $100,000.
497
00:29:54,001 --> 00:29:56,378
Yeah, right.
498
00:29:56,461 --> 00:29:59,381
- No, really. I'll pay you then.
- Just fuckin' show me the money, dude.
499
00:29:59,464 --> 00:30:01,425
- Look".
- You fuckin' seen Jerry Maguire?
500
00:30:01,508 --> 00:30:03,427
- You know what I'm talkin' about?
- No.
501
00:30:03,510 --> 00:30:06,388
"Show me the money!"
Fuckin' Thomas cruise style.
502
00:30:06,471 --> 00:30:07,782
- I don't know...
- You should see it, though,
503
00:30:07,806 --> 00:30:10,368
because it's got Jerry cantrell
from fuckin' Alice in chains in it.
504
00:30:10,392 --> 00:30:13,103
He plays, like, a fuckin'
kinko's, er... employee.
505
00:30:13,186 --> 00:30:15,314
There's a part where
Thomas cruise comes in,
506
00:30:15,397 --> 00:30:18,209
and he's got, like, a mission statement
he fuckin' stayed up all night and wrote...
507
00:30:18,233 --> 00:30:20,736
- Okay, look, I...
- I'm just trying to fuckin' tell you...
508
00:30:20,819 --> 00:30:22,380
- You should see the movie.
- Yeah, I know.
509
00:30:22,404 --> 00:30:24,406
I'm gonna have $100,000 real soon.
510
00:30:24,489 --> 00:30:26,491
Fuckin' Cuba gooding Jr
won an Oscar for the movie.
511
00:30:26,575 --> 00:30:28,535
- Who?
- Fuckin' Cuba gooding Jr.
512
00:30:28,618 --> 00:30:31,163
Look, man, I promise...
513
00:30:31,246 --> 00:30:33,975
He plays the football player that
Tom Cruise's character takes on as a client
514
00:30:33,999 --> 00:30:37,336
- when no-one believes in him.
- How come no-one believes in him?
515
00:30:37,461 --> 00:30:39,796
Because he left a high-end
agency on his own.
516
00:30:39,880 --> 00:30:41,720
He was trying to be
a Maverick of the industry,
517
00:30:41,757 --> 00:30:44,426
and base himself on ethics
rather than just money.
518
00:30:44,509 --> 00:30:47,054
So, with that said,
fuckin' show me the money.
519
00:30:47,137 --> 00:30:49,848
- I told you, I'm gonna pay you later.
- No, fuck that. Fuck paying.
520
00:30:49,931 --> 00:30:51,808
Challenge me.
521
00:30:51,892 --> 00:30:54,269
- Let's do a challenge for the pop.
- Challenge you?
522
00:30:55,187 --> 00:30:56,355
To do what?
523
00:30:58,857 --> 00:31:01,693
- Oh, you've had two of 'em?
- Hell, yeah.
524
00:31:01,777 --> 00:31:03,028
Two-litre hands.
525
00:31:04,154 --> 00:31:06,031
- Well, hand.
- Hands.
526
00:31:06,114 --> 00:31:07,574
- Hand.
- Two-iitre hands.
527
00:31:07,657 --> 00:31:10,243
- No, hand.
- Hands.
528
00:31:10,369 --> 00:31:12,037
- Hand.
- Hands.
529
00:31:12,120 --> 00:31:13,372
- Han-duh.
- Hands.
530
00:31:13,455 --> 00:31:15,040
- Han-duh.
- Hand-suh.
531
00:31:15,123 --> 00:31:17,250
- Han-duh.
- Hand-zzz.
532
00:31:17,334 --> 00:31:19,378
No. 'Cause I need one of them.
533
00:31:19,461 --> 00:31:21,129
- Hands.
- Han-duh.
534
00:31:21,213 --> 00:31:23,715
Are you fuckin' blind?
Hands. Two hands, dude.
535
00:31:23,799 --> 00:31:25,509
Right, but one of 'em's
gonna be mine.
536
00:31:27,469 --> 00:31:28,946
Oh, you don't think I can
drink all this shit?
537
00:31:28,970 --> 00:31:30,573
- You see, I know all about...
- Last week, during a shift,
538
00:31:30,597 --> 00:31:32,867
I drank a whole fuckin' three-litre
and two fuckin' belly busters.
539
00:31:32,891 --> 00:31:35,018
I didn't even piss.
With the fuckin' ac blastin'.
540
00:31:35,102 --> 00:31:36,829
Yeah, I know. You've been
bragging about it to everybody.
541
00:31:36,853 --> 00:31:38,122
That's why I'm not
gonna challenge you.
542
00:31:38,146 --> 00:31:40,706
Yeah, because I got a strong-ass dick
with pinching capabilities.
543
00:31:40,774 --> 00:31:42,818
I don't challenge you.
544
00:31:46,863 --> 00:31:49,366
Fuckit I'll challenge myself.
545
00:32:07,134 --> 00:32:08,134
Fuck.
546
00:32:18,353 --> 00:32:20,188
Help me with this shit, dude.
547
00:32:22,107 --> 00:32:23,584
- Here, fuckin' grab it.
- Get out of the way, man!
548
00:32:23,608 --> 00:32:25,152
Help me spin this shit.
549
00:32:27,154 --> 00:32:29,674
Help... here, fuckin' put it...
I can only get my fingers on it right now.
550
00:32:29,698 --> 00:32:31,992
Let me drink one.
551
00:32:32,075 --> 00:32:35,412
This one's regulation right here.
It's the second hand that always... fuck!
552
00:32:35,704 --> 00:32:37,205
- Here.
- No, you...
553
00:32:37,289 --> 00:32:38,433
- Just fuckin' pull it.
- Get out of the way!
554
00:32:38,457 --> 00:32:39,934
- Do it around my hand, dude.
- What are you...
555
00:32:39,958 --> 00:32:41,638
Fuckin' Indiana Jones
this shit around you.
556
00:32:46,631 --> 00:32:49,593
"Baby, you make me wish I had
three hands." What movie's that?
557
00:32:49,676 --> 00:32:52,762
- Can I have some?
- Fuckin' total recall, dawg.
558
00:32:52,846 --> 00:32:55,640
I gotta put this shit down
on the stool. Hold up.
559
00:32:55,724 --> 00:32:57,618
- Abbie: Can I have that cup?
- Dallas: Fuck, no.
560
00:32:57,642 --> 00:32:59,853
Unless you got some money for it.
561
00:32:59,936 --> 00:33:01,646
Boom! Who am I?
562
00:33:03,732 --> 00:33:05,984
Fuckin' cj. Pam Anderson, dawg.
563
00:33:06,067 --> 00:33:07,611
Big-ass titties.
564
00:33:07,694 --> 00:33:09,988
You know her titties
got soda in 'em, too.
565
00:33:10,071 --> 00:33:12,383
Do you have that tape you got
from your uncle? The pac-man tape?
566
00:33:12,407 --> 00:33:14,743
Check it out.
Fuckin' gunslinger. Boom.
567
00:33:14,826 --> 00:33:17,746
Fuckin' Texas outlaw right here,
fuckin' pullin' pistols out and shit.
568
00:33:17,829 --> 00:33:19,915
Can I please have some?
569
00:33:19,998 --> 00:33:21,976
You please may not have some, because
you ain't shown me no fuckin' money.
570
00:33:22,000 --> 00:33:23,585
May I please have some money?
571
00:33:23,668 --> 00:33:26,463
What's that fuckin' song?
J“ money, money, money, money j“
572
00:33:26,546 --> 00:33:28,298
j“ money j“
fuckin' karate kick right there.
573
00:33:28,381 --> 00:33:31,218
No, you're shaking it all up.
574
00:33:31,301 --> 00:33:33,678
- No...
- Fuckin' mtv grind and shit.
575
00:33:33,762 --> 00:33:36,389
- Come on, man.
- Put me on that shit, I'll be an all-star, dawg.
576
00:33:37,349 --> 00:33:39,184
Can you do that shit? No.
577
00:33:41,520 --> 00:33:43,021
Oh, shit.
He's put on his glasses.
578
00:33:43,104 --> 00:33:45,357
We got a fuckin' four-eyed,
3-d dickwad over here.
579
00:33:45,440 --> 00:33:47,067
Oh, shit. I'm really scared now.
580
00:33:47,150 --> 00:33:48,836
I's scared that he's never
gonna show me the money.
581
00:33:48,860 --> 00:33:51,029
Show me the money.
Show me the money.
582
00:33:51,112 --> 00:33:52,489
Stick your dick in honey!
583
00:33:54,282 --> 00:33:55,408
Please.
584
00:33:57,077 --> 00:33:59,120
Show me the money.
Show me the money.
585
00:33:59,204 --> 00:34:00,830
Oh, Jesus fuck!
586
00:34:03,166 --> 00:34:05,794
Oh...
587
00:34:17,389 --> 00:34:19,307
Dude, that was fuckin' insane.
588
00:34:22,811 --> 00:34:24,830
I don't know if it was
because I was fuckin' shakin' it,
589
00:34:24,854 --> 00:34:28,066
or if you did some fuckin'
professor x sorcery-type shit on me.
590
00:34:28,149 --> 00:34:31,194
- Can I please have a drink now?
- I want... you know what I'm sayin'?
591
00:34:31,278 --> 00:34:32,755
Someone steps to you,
they're gonna get fucked with hard
592
00:34:32,779 --> 00:34:34,573
if you can do
that mind control shit.
593
00:34:43,081 --> 00:34:44,874
What is this?
594
00:34:47,544 --> 00:34:48,837
- What are you doing?
- Ssh.
595
00:34:54,259 --> 00:34:55,302
What is this?
596
00:34:55,385 --> 00:34:58,054
- Read my mind, dude.
- What?
597
00:34:58,138 --> 00:35:00,157
I wanna see if this mind control shit
you're doing is fuckin' legit.
598
00:35:00,181 --> 00:35:02,642
I wanna know if that was
a freak accident, or if you...
599
00:35:02,726 --> 00:35:04,978
Just read my fuckin' mind.
Scan me.
600
00:35:06,062 --> 00:35:07,689
What am I thinking about?
601
00:35:09,566 --> 00:35:12,086
You're thinking about how you'd
like to give me a drink right now.
602
00:35:12,110 --> 00:35:14,362
Come on, man.
Take this shit serious.
603
00:35:14,446 --> 00:35:16,406
Tell me what
I'm fuckin' thinkin'.
604
00:35:17,574 --> 00:35:20,744
Come on, man. Here, tell me
what my mind is thinkin'.
605
00:35:20,827 --> 00:35:23,079
- Carmen electra.
- Are you fuckin' serious?
606
00:35:23,163 --> 00:35:25,391
- That's insane, dude.
- You always think about Carmen electra.
607
00:35:25,415 --> 00:35:27,393
No, I don't, dude, because
my dad got fuckin' cable now.
608
00:35:27,417 --> 00:35:29,353
We got the e network,
so Brooke Burke is my girl now.
609
00:35:29,377 --> 00:35:32,138
- Then why are you thinking about Carmen electra?
- I don't even know!
610
00:35:32,172 --> 00:35:34,799
I haven't had a jam session
to fuckin' Carmen electra in a while.
611
00:35:35,675 --> 00:35:37,385
Can I just please have a drink?
612
00:35:40,263 --> 00:35:43,475
Yeah, I guess so. Let me get you a cup.
Here, I'll put it in this cup for you.
613
00:35:43,558 --> 00:35:44,893
Don't...
614
00:35:44,976 --> 00:35:46,686
No! No! St... Stop!
615
00:35:47,145 --> 00:35:48,772
What?
616
00:35:50,565 --> 00:35:54,069
Come on. Please.
It's... it's completely wasteful.
617
00:35:54,152 --> 00:35:55,445
Why...?
618
00:36:01,701 --> 00:36:03,161
Dig in, player.
619
00:36:05,038 --> 00:36:07,198
Well, did you at least bring
your uncle's pac-man tape?
620
00:36:07,248 --> 00:36:09,459
Yeah. It's in the fuckin'
Popsicle bag. Toss it here.
621
00:36:18,677 --> 00:36:21,262
- Abbie: How long is this?
- Like, four hours.
622
00:36:22,639 --> 00:36:24,099
Four hours?
623
00:36:32,190 --> 00:36:33,650
Should start in a second.
624
00:36:40,657 --> 00:36:42,283
This shit's fuckin' hypnotic.
625
00:36:54,587 --> 00:36:57,298
No, fuck. Think my uncle
just forgot to rewind it.
626
00:37:16,693 --> 00:37:18,533
If you could play tic-tac-toe
against yourself,
627
00:37:18,653 --> 00:37:20,029
do you think you could win?
628
00:37:21,239 --> 00:37:23,283
Who, me?
629
00:37:23,366 --> 00:37:24,826
Anyone. I don't care.
630
00:37:26,411 --> 00:37:28,913
Yes. You just have to be
smarter than yourself.
631
00:37:33,084 --> 00:37:34,335
That makes sense.
632
00:37:42,510 --> 00:37:45,597
If you could have a super power,
which would you do, invisibility or flight?
633
00:37:47,265 --> 00:37:49,517
I don't know. Invisibility.
634
00:37:51,144 --> 00:37:53,104
- Fuckin' sex predator.
- Huh?
635
00:37:53,188 --> 00:37:54,981
You gotta be naked
to be invisible, dude.
636
00:37:55,064 --> 00:37:57,904
Otherwise, you're just a fuckin'
pair of pants and shirt runnin' around.
637
00:37:58,735 --> 00:38:00,236
All right, fine. Flight.
638
00:38:00,320 --> 00:38:02,572
- Pervert.
- What?
639
00:38:02,655 --> 00:38:04,949
You gotta be naked to fly, too.
640
00:38:05,033 --> 00:38:07,494
- Why?
- Solar—powered body.
641
00:38:07,577 --> 00:38:10,246
Oh. Just hit play.
642
00:38:10,330 --> 00:38:12,349
Fine. If I hit play, we'll be
right in the middle of season two,
643
00:38:12,373 --> 00:38:13,559
and won't know
where the fuck we are.
644
00:38:13,583 --> 00:38:15,919
Season two?
645
00:38:22,884 --> 00:38:24,528
Great. I have no idea what's
happening right now.
646
00:38:24,552 --> 00:38:26,095
Looks like a fuckin' pac-man picnic.
647
00:38:26,179 --> 00:38:27,847
Dallas, what is this?
648
00:38:27,931 --> 00:38:29,909
That's what happens when
you start it right in the middle.
649
00:38:29,933 --> 00:38:31,768
Abbie: What is this?
650
00:38:31,851 --> 00:38:34,451
It's the fuckin' lost season, dude.
They never released this shit.
651
00:38:36,481 --> 00:38:39,901
- This isn't the Jeffrey yee tape.
- Jeffrey's a poser, dude.
652
00:38:39,984 --> 00:38:41,694
This is a pac-man cartoon!
653
00:38:41,778 --> 00:38:44,298
My fuckin' uncle had to trade
half his two-headed snake for this.
654
00:38:44,322 --> 00:38:45,633
You think you can buy this
at media play?
655
00:38:45,657 --> 00:38:47,617
Try to order that shit.
Good fuckin' luck.
656
00:38:47,700 --> 00:38:51,788
I mean, you got this silly tape
that's just some stupid cartoon.
657
00:38:51,871 --> 00:38:54,082
This was an emergency.
658
00:38:54,165 --> 00:38:55,625
Doesn't your dad like cartoons?
659
00:38:56,793 --> 00:38:58,419
What?
660
00:38:58,503 --> 00:39:01,089
- Yeah, you know what I'm sayin'.
- No, I don't.
661
00:39:01,172 --> 00:39:03,591
- Don't they all like cartoons?
- Who's "they"?
662
00:39:03,675 --> 00:39:05,677
- I think you know.
- No, I don't.
663
00:39:05,760 --> 00:39:07,554
You fuckin' know, dude!
664
00:39:07,637 --> 00:39:12,267
You come over here, you got no pizza,
you got nothing for me to drink.
665
00:39:12,350 --> 00:39:13,950
And then this silly tape
of this cartoon!
666
00:39:14,018 --> 00:39:16,187
Fuck this, dude.
Ungrateful dumb-ass!
667
00:39:16,271 --> 00:39:18,082
- This is supposed to be an emergency.
- Fuckin' challenges.
668
00:39:18,106 --> 00:39:20,387
You know what's challenging?
Fuckin' brain capacity, dude.
669
00:39:20,441 --> 00:39:22,841
- You're fuckin' mentally challenged.
- Put the game back on.
670
00:39:23,695 --> 00:39:25,530
Slow-ass VCR.
Man, you can go eat a butt.
671
00:39:29,993 --> 00:39:33,454
Don't... you'd better not.
Don't! I'm serious, dude.
672
00:39:34,539 --> 00:39:36,082
Don't do that. I'm...
673
00:39:39,586 --> 00:39:43,131
I'm serious, dude.
I'll Chuck this at you. Don't.
674
00:39:43,214 --> 00:39:45,300
I won't come back.
675
00:39:45,383 --> 00:39:47,383
- Man, stop fuckin' iookin' at me like that.
- Hey!
676
00:39:48,428 --> 00:39:49,470
Oh, you do that...
677
00:39:57,437 --> 00:39:59,498
Throw this shit at you.
You gonna get fuckin' sticky.
678
00:39:59,522 --> 00:40:01,274
You're gonna get sticky, dude.
679
00:40:01,357 --> 00:40:03,234
Fuck that! I'm out!
680
00:40:07,947 --> 00:40:08,990
Woot woot!
681
00:43:08,127 --> 00:43:09,420
Oh, Jesus.
682
00:45:36,234 --> 00:45:37,234
Cam?
683
00:45:40,905 --> 00:45:42,990
Did you forget your key?
684
00:45:54,502 --> 00:45:56,462
Abbie: Are you janitor Jim?
685
00:46:00,800 --> 00:46:02,218
Abbie: What?
686
00:46:07,265 --> 00:46:08,891
Abbie: What?
687
00:46:08,975 --> 00:46:12,561
Abbie: Oh.
688
00:46:12,645 --> 00:46:16,524
I bet you're smelling Dallas'
baloney sandwich from the refrigerator.
689
00:46:16,607 --> 00:46:18,168
Hey, could you hand me
that cup real quick?
690
00:46:18,192 --> 00:46:19,912
I think there's
a little left in the bottom.
691
00:46:31,789 --> 00:46:34,333
Abbie: I...
I don't actually live here.
692
00:46:49,849 --> 00:46:52,310
You know, I actually need that open,
if that's okay.
693
00:46:54,228 --> 00:46:55,646
What is he saying?
694
00:46:55,730 --> 00:46:57,231
Woman: Gas.
695
00:46:57,315 --> 00:46:59,066
Gas?
696
00:46:59,150 --> 00:47:02,528
Janitor Jim: Bug bomb.
697
00:47:02,611 --> 00:47:04,864
- What does that mean?
- Woman: Bug bomb.
698
00:47:06,324 --> 00:47:07,700
Bug bomb?
699
00:47:11,495 --> 00:47:13,622
Bug bomb.
700
00:47:16,083 --> 00:47:18,336
Twelve hours.
701
00:47:18,419 --> 00:47:20,796
You have to be out,
twelve hours.
702
00:47:22,089 --> 00:47:23,257
Understand?
703
00:47:24,717 --> 00:47:27,553
I'm kinda busy right now.
704
00:47:27,636 --> 00:47:30,097
C... could you come back
a little later, maybe...
705
00:47:30,181 --> 00:47:33,684
Get up.
706
00:47:33,768 --> 00:47:34,977
I am looking for eggs.
707
00:47:39,732 --> 00:47:41,067
Right.
708
00:47:41,150 --> 00:47:45,488
I'm on a challenge right now.
Could you tell...
709
00:48:05,007 --> 00:48:06,967
On three. One, two, three.
710
00:48:15,768 --> 00:48:18,104
Abbie: Well, how 'bout you
move me over by the kitchen
711
00:48:18,187 --> 00:48:21,023
so I can get something
to eat that way?
712
00:48:21,107 --> 00:48:23,150
Does that... that work?
713
00:48:24,235 --> 00:48:27,154
Janitor Jim:
Holy shit! Bart Simpson?
714
00:48:29,824 --> 00:48:31,617
- Abbie: Oh.
- Garbage?
715
00:48:33,744 --> 00:48:35,830
Abbie: I can't...
I can't really see the TV now.
716
00:48:36,956 --> 00:48:40,167
Janitor Jim: Er...
Give me a number seven.
717
00:48:41,127 --> 00:48:42,169
One more.
718
00:48:44,296 --> 00:48:47,675
Abbie: It's gonna be pretty hard
to play the video game from here.
719
00:48:50,010 --> 00:48:52,430
It'd be great if you could just
kinda swing me back.
720
00:48:53,013 --> 00:48:54,056
Janitor Jim: No.
721
00:48:56,434 --> 00:49:00,604
Abbie: Look, I'm playing this video game,
and if! Beat it, I get $100,000.
722
00:49:00,688 --> 00:49:05,025
So, I'll give you 10,000.
723
00:49:05,109 --> 00:49:06,819
Janitor Jim:
What are you talking about?
724
00:49:06,902 --> 00:49:08,839
Abbie: If you move me back,
then I can beat the video game.
725
00:49:08,863 --> 00:49:12,867
But I can't do it from here, so there's...
There's no money that way. You see?
726
00:49:14,743 --> 00:49:16,383
Janitor Jim: Keep talkin'.
I'm interested.
727
00:50:30,110 --> 00:50:33,197
Hello? _
728
00:50:33,280 --> 00:50:34,280
Abbie.
729
00:50:36,784 --> 00:50:38,619
It's arin bechdel.
730
00:50:42,206 --> 00:50:44,542
Dallas told me
where the key was.
731
00:50:44,625 --> 00:50:46,210
I tried calling you.
732
00:50:47,294 --> 00:50:50,464
Abbie: Yeah.
My night-light went out.
733
00:50:51,590 --> 00:50:53,217
Night-light?
734
00:50:53,300 --> 00:50:54,843
It's above the sink.
735
00:50:54,927 --> 00:50:58,973
It keeps going on and off,
and it just went off.
736
00:50:59,890 --> 00:51:02,560
Everything's got weird around here.
737
00:51:03,769 --> 00:51:05,354
How long have you
been sitting there?
738
00:51:07,189 --> 00:51:09,650
- What day is it?
- Thursday.
739
00:51:10,859 --> 00:51:13,612
- What's the date?
- It's the 25th.
740
00:51:13,696 --> 00:51:14,989
It's Christmas?
741
00:51:15,072 --> 00:51:16,156
July.
742
00:51:18,617 --> 00:51:21,370
- 2000?
- Mm-mmm. Not yet.
743
00:51:23,414 --> 00:51:28,002
Well, I've been sitting here
for a few hours, I guess.
744
00:51:28,085 --> 00:51:29,670
Is it okay if I come in?
745
00:51:30,421 --> 00:51:31,421
Yeah.
746
00:51:33,424 --> 00:51:36,176
I brought a newspaper.
You like comics, right?
747
00:51:40,472 --> 00:51:42,516
You need anything else?
748
00:51:44,226 --> 00:51:45,269
No, I'm okay.
749
00:51:53,110 --> 00:51:56,447
Abbie, we gotta get this together.
This is not good.
750
00:51:56,530 --> 00:51:59,158
Abbie: Can I just borrow
the game for one more day?
751
00:52:00,284 --> 00:52:01,702
Arin: You're still playin'.
752
00:52:03,746 --> 00:52:05,581
I gotta beat level 256.
753
00:52:05,664 --> 00:52:06,874
What?
754
00:52:07,708 --> 00:52:09,084
Cam challenged me.
755
00:52:11,503 --> 00:52:12,588
256?
756
00:52:14,298 --> 00:52:15,299
Yeah.
757
00:52:15,382 --> 00:52:17,676
The Billy Mitchell contest?
758
00:52:17,760 --> 00:52:19,428
You know about that?
759
00:52:21,180 --> 00:52:22,556
It's impossible.
760
00:52:24,600 --> 00:52:26,101
What?
761
00:52:26,185 --> 00:52:28,270
Level 256 is a glitch.
762
00:52:30,564 --> 00:52:31,940
Wh... what?
763
00:52:33,734 --> 00:52:35,444
Billy Mitchell can't even do it.
764
00:52:36,695 --> 00:52:38,072
It's not possible, sweetheart.
765
00:52:39,198 --> 00:52:40,532
No, but...
766
00:52:42,493 --> 00:52:44,411
It's a publicity stunt,
the contest.
767
00:52:46,121 --> 00:52:49,416
No, but I can. I can do it.
768
00:52:49,500 --> 00:52:51,543
I just need to borrow the game
for one more day.
769
00:52:51,627 --> 00:52:53,087
Can I, please?
770
00:52:53,170 --> 00:52:54,254
Why?
771
00:52:56,840 --> 00:52:58,550
Have you ever been
to California?
772
00:53:02,513 --> 00:53:04,390
Arin: Disneyland a few times.
773
00:53:04,765 --> 00:53:08,268
Ch.. Check this out.
774
00:53:18,112 --> 00:53:20,155
Abbie: It's for my dad.
775
00:53:20,239 --> 00:53:23,951
He lives out there.
I just thought he might need one.
776
00:53:25,994 --> 00:53:27,579
I'm gonna give it to him.
777
00:53:29,206 --> 00:53:31,625
He used to always buy survival stuff
for me and cam.
778
00:53:33,585 --> 00:53:34,962
Like these.
779
00:53:41,051 --> 00:53:43,137
Yeah, he said they'd help me.
780
00:53:44,888 --> 00:53:47,641
But mom always told me
to throw 'em away.
781
00:54:01,155 --> 00:54:03,782
Look, maybe this'll help.
782
00:54:03,866 --> 00:54:08,829
There was a kid
named Jeffrey yee... wu.
783
00:54:09,830 --> 00:54:12,291
He created a pattern.
784
00:54:13,333 --> 00:54:15,669
Yeah. You know about him?
785
00:54:15,753 --> 00:54:19,339
Yeah. My ex-boyfriend sure did.
786
00:54:21,008 --> 00:54:23,343
So, you can walk through ghosts,
787
00:54:23,427 --> 00:54:25,596
but you have to use
this pattern.
788
00:54:25,679 --> 00:54:29,475
And it has to be
within 1/60th of a second.
789
00:54:29,558 --> 00:54:31,310
Not everybody can do it.
790
00:54:41,779 --> 00:54:43,572
Do you remember
when we worked together?
791
00:54:44,615 --> 00:54:45,991
Mmm.
792
00:54:46,074 --> 00:54:48,494
Maybe I could try that again.
793
00:54:48,577 --> 00:54:50,621
Do you still work there?
794
00:54:50,704 --> 00:54:55,334
That wasn't a good week for you.
I'm a nurse now.
795
00:54:55,417 --> 00:54:58,879
- You're a nurse?
- Yeah. Cortez still works there, though.
796
00:55:00,214 --> 00:55:02,257
- How do you know?
- Hmm.
797
00:55:03,926 --> 00:55:06,094
Man: Hey, the car's running.
798
00:55:06,178 --> 00:55:09,056
Arin: Cortez, I need you
to wait downstairs, please.
799
00:55:09,139 --> 00:55:12,142
Cortez: Smells like
uncle Ron's crib up in here.
800
00:55:12,226 --> 00:55:15,771
- Man, turn on some goddamn lights!
- I'll be down in a second.
801
00:55:17,564 --> 00:55:19,650
Look at this skinny-ass punk
sitting on the couch.
802
00:55:19,733 --> 00:55:22,152
What the fuck you doin',
sittin' talking to this motherfuck?
803
00:55:23,946 --> 00:55:25,614
Will you wait downstairs, please?
804
00:55:28,033 --> 00:55:32,120
Yo. Yo, what the fuck...
What's your fuckin' name again, bro?
805
00:55:32,204 --> 00:55:36,166
It's, um... some girl's shit, right?
Like Ashley, or some shit like that?
806
00:55:36,250 --> 00:55:38,460
- Abner.
- Abbie.
807
00:55:38,544 --> 00:55:39,878
That's right.
808
00:55:39,962 --> 00:55:42,589
So, you know about
this kid's dad?
809
00:55:42,673 --> 00:55:44,216
Arin: Don't.
810
00:55:44,299 --> 00:55:45,425
Yo, tell her.
811
00:55:47,511 --> 00:55:48,804
Abbie, don't.
812
00:55:50,264 --> 00:55:52,474
Well, I just know
what people told me.
813
00:55:54,184 --> 00:55:56,478
He left when
I was in second grade.
814
00:55:56,562 --> 00:56:00,399
Went to California
and became a truck driver.
815
00:56:00,482 --> 00:56:04,736
And... he was just helping out
some high-school kid with his flat tyre.
816
00:56:06,113 --> 00:56:08,407
I think they were
at a rest stop or something.
817
00:56:08,490 --> 00:56:12,911
And... I don't know.
He's not supposed to be in trouble.
818
00:56:12,995 --> 00:56:15,122
Yeah. Keep goin'.
819
00:56:15,205 --> 00:56:16,290
Arin: Cortez.
820
00:56:18,542 --> 00:56:20,711
Abbie: Well, they
had to go in the restroom
821
00:56:20,794 --> 00:56:23,630
to talk more about the...
The tyre warranty,
822
00:56:23,714 --> 00:56:26,133
'cause it was pouring rain outside.
823
00:56:27,718 --> 00:56:30,178
Or something.
He was just trying to be helpful.
824
00:56:30,262 --> 00:56:32,306
He's really not
supposed to be locked up.
825
00:56:33,724 --> 00:56:35,364
- He got arrested.
- Cortez: Prison queen.
826
00:56:35,434 --> 00:56:36,810
Cortez.
827
00:56:39,229 --> 00:56:42,357
Do you know where pleasant
valley correctional facility is?
828
00:56:42,441 --> 00:56:45,694
- It might be by Disneyland.
- Oh, my god. Let's go.
829
00:56:45,777 --> 00:56:48,155
This gay-ass shit
up in here, man.
830
00:56:49,489 --> 00:56:51,283
- Cortez.
- Cortez: Come on.
831
00:56:51,366 --> 00:56:53,035
Define "gay-ass shit".
832
00:56:54,453 --> 00:56:57,039
- Well...
- Come on, tell me. I wanna hear.
833
00:56:57,122 --> 00:56:58,707
- What?
- Arin: Tell me.
834
00:56:59,374 --> 00:57:00,834
What's "gay-ass shit"?
835
00:57:02,210 --> 00:57:05,797
Cortez: I don't know.
Maybe... maybe kissin'.
836
00:57:05,881 --> 00:57:09,092
Rubbin' they dicks together
and shit. I don't know.
837
00:57:09,176 --> 00:57:12,971
- So, you must think about this a lot.
- Cortez: Oh, come on.
838
00:57:13,055 --> 00:57:17,059
So, you think about this every time
you look at all guys, or just gay guys?
839
00:57:17,893 --> 00:57:18,893
Let's go.
840
00:57:20,395 --> 00:57:22,481
Arin: So, question for you.
841
00:57:22,564 --> 00:57:25,484
Do you think about sex
every time you look at a woman?
842
00:57:27,444 --> 00:57:29,071
What?
843
00:57:29,154 --> 00:57:31,865
Arin: Do you think about sex
every time you look at a woman?
844
00:57:33,367 --> 00:57:35,118
Can we 90, please?
845
00:57:35,202 --> 00:57:37,454
I'm not going anywhere with you
till you tell me.
846
00:57:37,537 --> 00:57:40,916
Do you think about sex
every time you look at a woman?
847
00:57:44,670 --> 00:57:46,088
No. No, I don't.
848
00:57:46,171 --> 00:57:47,798
- Why not?
- Come on, man.
849
00:57:47,881 --> 00:57:50,968
Martel probably got some big motherfuckers
out here looking for me right now!
850
00:57:51,051 --> 00:57:53,804
- Arin: Who the hell is that?
- Shit. Come on. Let's go!
851
00:57:54,554 --> 00:57:56,515
What the fuck is you iookin' at?
852
00:58:12,948 --> 00:58:13,948
Abbie.
853
00:58:18,620 --> 00:58:19,913
Abbie!
854
00:58:21,415 --> 00:58:23,208
Abbie!
855
00:58:28,130 --> 00:58:31,133
Cortez: 3-d glasses.
The fuck is this bullshit?
856
00:58:33,176 --> 00:58:35,887
You can stay if you want.
I'm outta here.
857
00:58:37,889 --> 00:58:38,974
I can't.
858
00:58:40,100 --> 00:58:42,602
Look. Here, take this.
859
00:58:46,440 --> 00:58:47,941
So I can keep the game?
860
00:58:52,654 --> 00:58:53,780
Arin!
861
00:59:02,289 --> 00:59:04,041
Y... you gotta put the key back!
862
01:02:21,404 --> 01:02:22,404
Yeah.
863
01:03:06,616 --> 01:03:07,617
Okay.
864
01:03:08,618 --> 01:03:09,703
Okay.
865
01:03:24,092 --> 01:03:25,802
Okay.
866
01:03:25,927 --> 01:03:27,095
Okay.
867
01:03:28,388 --> 01:03:29,556
Yeah.
868
01:03:31,099 --> 01:03:32,099
Yeah.
869
01:04:54,349 --> 01:04:56,601
Hey, Dallas. I got a challenge.
870
01:04:56,684 --> 01:04:59,479
This one. It's a real emergency.
871
01:04:59,562 --> 01:05:01,898
It's not... no.
872
01:05:01,981 --> 01:05:04,150
I... this is what happened. I...
873
01:05:06,820 --> 01:05:08,321
No, no. It's...
874
01:05:10,115 --> 01:05:11,157
Dallas.
875
01:05:15,120 --> 01:05:16,204
Dallas.
876
01:05:19,666 --> 01:05:21,501
No. Help me, man.
877
01:08:03,788 --> 01:08:05,832
My father, your father...
878
01:08:06,666 --> 01:08:08,334
Were hanging up clothes.
879
01:08:09,502 --> 01:08:12,213
My father punched your father
880
01:08:12,297 --> 01:08:14,716
right in the nose.
881
01:08:14,799 --> 01:08:17,719
What colour was the blood?
882
01:08:17,802 --> 01:08:23,349
R-e-d spells red,
and you are not it.
883
01:08:24,392 --> 01:08:25,518
You're not it.
884
01:08:44,871 --> 01:08:46,623
Oh, god.
885
01:10:05,535 --> 01:10:06,661
Oh!
886
01:10:18,423 --> 01:10:20,508
You are it.
887
01:10:52,874 --> 01:10:57,837
Abbie: J“ happy birthday to you
888
01:11:00,131 --> 01:11:05,762
J' happy birthday to you
889
01:11:07,722 --> 01:11:11,392
j“ happy birthday
890
01:11:11,476 --> 01:11:14,562
j“ dear Abbie
891
01:11:16,189 --> 01:11:23,237
j“ happy birthday to you j“
892
01:13:15,975 --> 01:13:17,310
That's a tie.
893
01:13:19,562 --> 01:13:20,855
That's a tie.
894
01:13:23,774 --> 01:13:25,109
Tie as well.
895
01:13:29,989 --> 01:13:31,324
They're all ties.
896
01:13:36,078 --> 01:13:37,914
What have we got? Sports.
897
01:13:42,585 --> 01:13:45,504
And sports, sports.
898
01:13:45,588 --> 01:13:47,256
Where's the comics, man?
899
01:13:47,340 --> 01:13:48,507
"The far side."
900
01:13:54,221 --> 01:13:55,222
Yeah.
901
01:14:02,521 --> 01:14:04,482
"Thank god I'm saved."
902
01:14:13,449 --> 01:14:17,244
Oh! Because
he saved the palm tree.
903
01:14:17,328 --> 01:14:20,081
Saved the palm tree.
"Thank god I'm saved."
904
01:14:26,879 --> 01:14:28,422
"Thank god I'm saved."
905
01:14:29,382 --> 01:14:30,883
But I'm not saved.
906
01:14:31,926 --> 01:14:33,344
I'm not saved.
907
01:14:34,553 --> 01:14:36,722
You know, I... I quit!
908
01:15:20,016 --> 01:15:22,810
_
909
01:15:43,247 --> 01:15:45,124
Hey, cam, check this out.
910
01:15:59,972 --> 01:16:01,182
Here we go.
911
01:17:11,544 --> 01:17:12,544
I hate you.
912
01:18:08,225 --> 01:18:11,937
Ten, nine, eight, seven,
913
01:18:12,021 --> 01:18:17,276
six, five, four, three,
two, one.
914
01:20:12,016 --> 01:20:13,892
Cam!
915
01:21:31,845 --> 01:21:33,889
Cam: Find them kool-aid packets?
916
01:21:35,349 --> 01:21:36,767
Joao!
917
01:21:36,850 --> 01:21:39,311
Fuck. You listening to me?
918
01:21:40,104 --> 01:21:41,104
Shit.
919
01:22:06,255 --> 01:22:07,255
Abbie.
920
01:22:22,563 --> 01:22:24,982
Oh. Hey, cam.
921
01:22:28,861 --> 01:22:30,320
Oh, hey, joao.
922
01:22:33,532 --> 01:22:34,741
Didn't quit.
923
01:22:37,911 --> 01:22:39,496
Cam: What are you doing?
924
01:22:44,168 --> 01:22:45,419
Relaxing.
925
01:22:47,796 --> 01:22:50,132
You've been sitting here
this whole time?
926
01:22:53,093 --> 01:22:54,094
Well...
927
01:22:55,137 --> 01:22:56,597
What time is it?
928
01:22:59,641 --> 01:23:01,059
Cam: Who knows?
929
01:23:03,854 --> 01:23:05,856
Oh, man.
930
01:23:05,939 --> 01:23:09,067
I've been here since
this morning, I think.
931
01:23:13,197 --> 01:23:14,698
Did I miss fourth of July?
932
01:23:19,703 --> 01:23:22,289
A... am I dead?
Where is everybody?
933
01:23:22,998 --> 01:23:24,208
Cam: Bunkeh
934
01:23:24,917 --> 01:23:27,044
- is dad there?
- Cam: Dad!
935
01:23:27,127 --> 01:23:29,296
You get the toilet paper?
Let's go. Come on, hurry up.
936
01:23:29,379 --> 01:23:30,547
Is he there?
937
01:23:31,757 --> 01:23:34,176
Cam: Oh, yeah. Yeah.
938
01:23:34,259 --> 01:23:37,429
He said that, er...
He started walking last week.
939
01:23:37,513 --> 01:23:39,431
He's just out there
looking for some snow boots.
940
01:23:39,515 --> 01:23:43,143
- Really?
- No, fucking idiot. He's probably dead.
941
01:23:43,227 --> 01:23:45,479
People are eating each other
alive out there.
942
01:23:46,313 --> 01:23:47,981
It's just like I said.
943
01:23:51,985 --> 01:23:54,279
I think it's my fault.
944
01:23:55,280 --> 01:23:57,491
- I broke it.
- What?
945
01:23:59,284 --> 01:24:00,953
Level257.
946
01:24:02,162 --> 01:24:03,288
I saw it.
947
01:24:10,212 --> 01:24:16,260
And it's like when we were kids,
and we were riding in the car,
948
01:24:16,343 --> 01:24:18,762
and we'd see a sunset,
949
01:24:18,845 --> 01:24:20,806
and...
950
01:24:20,889 --> 01:24:23,475
The light would come
through the windshield,
951
01:24:23,559 --> 01:24:25,978
and dad would say,
"that's what it looks like
952
01:24:26,061 --> 01:24:28,772
"when a big bomb goes off
in the distance."
953
01:24:31,400 --> 01:24:33,485
And it felt like it could hurt you.
954
01:24:34,653 --> 01:24:36,655
And it did give me headaches.
955
01:24:36,738 --> 01:24:39,908
But I didn't get headaches
this time because I...
956
01:24:39,992 --> 01:24:41,827
I think it's
because of the glasses.
957
01:24:43,579 --> 01:24:45,539
I... it was amazing.
958
01:24:45,622 --> 01:24:50,210
The... crowds of people
were cheering me on.
959
01:24:50,294 --> 01:24:52,212
And there were...
960
01:24:53,839 --> 01:24:57,217
Colours, explosions.
961
01:24:57,301 --> 01:25:00,721
It was... it was like
I was in California.
962
01:25:03,765 --> 01:25:05,559
Joao! Let's go!
963
01:25:06,935 --> 01:25:08,770
Give me a slice of that pizza.
964
01:25:16,695 --> 01:25:19,364
So, you're just gonna sit here
until you die?
965
01:25:22,618 --> 01:25:27,247
No. I'm just gonna relax
for a little while longer.
966
01:25:34,463 --> 01:25:36,298
We could use this.
Joao, take it.
967
01:25:39,968 --> 01:25:41,720
- What's this shit?
- Hey, don't touch that.
968
01:25:41,803 --> 01:25:43,889
- What is it?
- Hey, be careful. He's sleeping.
969
01:25:45,849 --> 01:25:47,392
- Oh!
- Don't!
970
01:25:48,852 --> 01:25:51,063
Damn. It actually
doesn't look that bad.
971
01:25:51,146 --> 01:25:53,148
- We'll just boil him up.
- No. I mean it.
972
01:25:53,231 --> 01:25:54,733
You want a bite?
973
01:25:55,150 --> 01:25:56,150
Hmm?
974
01:26:00,030 --> 01:26:01,030
Take it.
975
01:26:02,491 --> 01:26:03,659
Come on.
976
01:26:04,534 --> 01:26:06,828
Shit. You can't...
977
01:26:06,912 --> 01:26:09,915
You can't stand up, can you?
978
01:26:09,998 --> 01:26:10,998
Huh?
979
01:26:13,085 --> 01:26:16,421
Put... him... back.
980
01:26:20,175 --> 01:26:21,968
You're not allowed to touch him.
981
01:26:27,724 --> 01:26:29,267
You wanna beat me up?
982
01:26:30,727 --> 01:26:31,895
Hmm?
983
01:26:34,272 --> 01:26:36,608
Try it! Come on!
984
01:26:36,692 --> 01:26:38,485
Take it!
985
01:26:38,568 --> 01:26:41,530
Come on. Stand up.
You hate me, don't you?
986
01:26:41,613 --> 01:26:44,908
You've always fuckin' hated me.
Why don't you just admit it?
987
01:26:44,991 --> 01:26:47,744
Say it!
988
01:26:47,828 --> 01:26:50,122
What the fuck is that?
989
01:26:52,874 --> 01:26:53,959
Holy shit!
990
01:27:00,048 --> 01:27:01,174
We have power?
991
01:27:04,177 --> 01:27:05,887
What the fuck are you iookin' at?
992
01:27:08,849 --> 01:27:11,560
Stop fuckin' iookin' at me.
993
01:27:14,479 --> 01:27:16,398
What are you fuckin' iookin' at?
994
01:27:18,150 --> 01:27:19,651
Where the fuck are you goin'?
995
01:27:20,986 --> 01:27:22,988
You stop fuckin'
iookin' at me, all right?
996
01:27:34,124 --> 01:27:42,124
Chorus: J“ peregrinus expectavi
997
01:27:43,175 --> 01:27:47,220
j“ pedes meos... j“
998
01:27:47,345 --> 01:27:49,014
stop fucking iookin' at me!
999
01:27:49,097 --> 01:27:52,350
J“ ...In cymbalis j“
1000
01:28:10,952 --> 01:28:18,952
Chorus: J“ peregrinus expectavi
1001
01:28:20,545 --> 01:28:28,545
j“ pedes meos in cymbalis
1002
01:28:29,805 --> 01:28:34,392
j“ peregrinus... j“
1003
01:29:05,924 --> 01:29:13,924
Chorus:
J“ peregrinus, peregrinus... j“
1004
01:30:15,827 --> 01:30:16,995
You made it.
1005
01:31:06,795 --> 01:31:14,795
Subtitles by anti-worlds releasing ltd
70325
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof