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1
00:00:01,800 --> 00:00:03,959
Sorry. Er, Professor!
2
00:00:03,960 --> 00:00:05,959
Professor Thomas! Sorry.
3
00:00:05,960 --> 00:00:07,959
Er, it's about the
consultant interviews.
4
00:00:07,960 --> 00:00:10,959
We had, erm, a... a meeting,
5
00:00:10,960 --> 00:00:13,959
erm, for the consultant interviews.
I'm one of the candidates.
6
00:00:13,960 --> 00:00:15,959
Catherine MacDiarmid.
I know who you are.
7
00:00:15,960 --> 00:00:17,159
You were late.
8
00:00:17,160 --> 00:00:20,639
And where do you see yourself
in ten years' time, Jack?
9
00:00:20,640 --> 00:00:22,960
Clinical Director of Surgery.
10
00:00:23,960 --> 00:00:27,319
But I find myself increasingly
humble about planning.
11
00:00:27,320 --> 00:00:28,479
HE CHUCKLES
12
00:00:28,480 --> 00:00:29,959
My day's been like dominoes.
13
00:00:29,960 --> 00:00:31,959
One delay to surgery
this morning, and I'm...
14
00:00:31,960 --> 00:00:33,959
Oh, just seven minutes late.
15
00:00:33,960 --> 00:00:35,160
PHONE RINGS
16
00:00:37,960 --> 00:00:39,959
Nice shot, Alan.
17
00:00:39,960 --> 00:00:41,959
Could I buy you a
cup of tea, perhaps?
18
00:00:41,960 --> 00:00:42,959
PHONE RINGING
19
00:00:42,960 --> 00:00:44,959
Hadn't you better answer that?
20
00:00:44,960 --> 00:00:47,959
I'd love the opportunity to tell
you what I have to offer the trust.
21
00:00:47,960 --> 00:00:50,320
Besides punctuality (?)
22
00:00:54,960 --> 00:00:56,959
Planning is all well and good,
23
00:00:56,960 --> 00:00:58,959
but what the last few years
have taught me is adaptability.
24
00:00:58,960 --> 00:01:01,960
That's what it's all about.
I couldn't agree more.
25
00:01:04,960 --> 00:01:06,960
Whoa! Good work, Jack!
26
00:01:13,960 --> 00:01:16,960
PHONE RINGS
27
00:01:23,000 --> 00:01:24,959
What is it, Lars?
28
00:01:24,960 --> 00:01:26,959
'Just to say that the
flight's all on time.'
29
00:01:26,960 --> 00:01:28,959
Great.
30
00:01:28,960 --> 00:01:32,959
THUNDER ROLLS
31
00:01:32,960 --> 00:01:33,960
SHE SIGHS
32
00:01:37,960 --> 00:01:41,960
DOG BARKING, PEOPLE
CHATTING FAINTLY
33
00:01:51,960 --> 00:01:53,959
RADIO ALARM: 'Woman'
by Little Simz
34
00:01:53,960 --> 00:01:58,959
♪ I love how you go from zero
35
00:01:58,960 --> 00:02:00,959
♪ To one hundred
36
00:02:00,960 --> 00:02:04,959
♪ And leave the dust behind
37
00:02:04,960 --> 00:02:08,959
♪ You've got this
All action, no talk
38
00:02:08,960 --> 00:02:10,959
♪ I see you glow
You're the finest gold
39
00:02:10,960 --> 00:02:13,959
♪ When you walk in the
room They feel your soul
40
00:02:13,960 --> 00:02:16,319
♪ Your style, it
shines So ahead of time
41
00:02:16,320 --> 00:02:20,960
♪ And you know that you're fire
You're so damn fine, girl... ♪
42
00:02:24,320 --> 00:02:25,959
Jesus Christ.
43
00:02:25,960 --> 00:02:29,159
Go on, in you go.
Yes, you can watch TV.
44
00:02:29,160 --> 00:02:32,959
Hello! How was Grandma's?
Hello! That's a lovely picture.
45
00:02:32,960 --> 00:02:34,959
Oh, my gosh, there's
glitter everywhere.
46
00:02:34,960 --> 00:02:36,959
How was Grandma's?
47
00:02:36,960 --> 00:02:38,959
48 hours is definitely
everyone's limit.
48
00:02:38,960 --> 00:02:41,959
Could you just look after them for
half an hour while I have a shower?
49
00:02:41,960 --> 00:02:44,960
Yeah, sure. Actually, er, no.
Can we just have a quick chat?
50
00:02:46,960 --> 00:02:49,640
Yeah, sure. Thanks.
Do you mind...?
51
00:03:06,960 --> 00:03:08,960
MAN: Raz! Hello.
How are you, mate?
52
00:03:14,800 --> 00:03:16,480
Just give me a sec.
53
00:03:19,960 --> 00:03:22,959
Maz. Have you
slept at all today?
54
00:03:22,960 --> 00:03:25,479
Oh, you were going in to fix me.
55
00:03:25,480 --> 00:03:27,959
Less Ibadat, more like an
appointment at the Genius Bar?
56
00:03:27,960 --> 00:03:29,959
I needed to speak to someone,
I didn't know where else to go.
57
00:03:29,960 --> 00:03:31,959
I am not having this
conversation in the street.
58
00:03:31,960 --> 00:03:34,959
Fine. Let's go home and have it.
I can't, I've gotta go to work.
59
00:03:34,960 --> 00:03:36,799
You can't keep going in,
Maz, you're not well.
60
00:03:36,800 --> 00:03:38,959
Oh, don't be another person
telling me how I feel.
61
00:03:38,960 --> 00:03:41,479
Then you tell me. Talk to me.
Why are you still going to work?
62
00:03:41,480 --> 00:03:43,319
It's not just the job.
You've never understood.
63
00:03:43,320 --> 00:03:45,959
I really struggle with the
saviour complex. What?!
64
00:03:45,960 --> 00:03:46,959
There are other doctors!
65
00:03:46,960 --> 00:03:48,959
The whole thing won't come
crashing down if you're not there.
66
00:03:48,960 --> 00:03:50,959
You've not seen the gaps
in the rota this week.
67
00:03:50,960 --> 00:03:52,959
Look, I understand
you're punishing yourself
68
00:03:52,960 --> 00:03:54,799
for what happened
to that little boy.
69
00:03:54,800 --> 00:03:55,959
Edward. His name was Edward.
70
00:03:55,960 --> 00:03:57,959
You can say no to
being kind to yourself,
71
00:03:57,960 --> 00:03:59,959
to me, to our children,
to that baby girl,
72
00:03:59,960 --> 00:04:01,639
but you can't say no
to that place, can you?
73
00:04:01,640 --> 00:04:03,799
I don't understand that.
I haven't said no to her.
74
00:04:03,800 --> 00:04:05,639
I've said I need to get
past the investigation.
75
00:04:05,640 --> 00:04:07,319
They need an answer, Maz.
76
00:04:07,320 --> 00:04:09,959
I'm not having this
conversation in the street.
77
00:04:09,960 --> 00:04:11,959
You can't keep
choosing to be a doctor
78
00:04:11,960 --> 00:04:14,959
at the expense of everything
else, Maz. Please.
79
00:04:14,960 --> 00:04:16,960
Maz?
80
00:04:28,640 --> 00:04:29,959
What is it?
81
00:04:29,960 --> 00:04:32,959
The other night, when
I called you from work.
82
00:04:32,960 --> 00:04:33,959
I know that you'd been...
83
00:04:33,960 --> 00:04:35,959
Mummy! Yes, Maggie.
84
00:04:35,960 --> 00:04:38,319
Can you just watch TV
for a minute, please?
85
00:04:38,320 --> 00:04:39,959
Can I have my hot milk?
Yeah, in a minute.
86
00:04:39,960 --> 00:04:42,319
Guy, I...
87
00:04:42,320 --> 00:04:43,959
I know that you'd been drinking.
88
00:04:43,960 --> 00:04:46,959
Mummy, I want a hot
milk! Yes, in a minute!
89
00:04:46,960 --> 00:04:47,959
It was half a glass of wine.
90
00:04:47,960 --> 00:04:50,959
I think you need to ask
yourself, what is this, really?
91
00:04:50,960 --> 00:04:52,960
Mummy, hot milk!
I'm making it!
92
00:04:54,960 --> 00:04:56,959
You're lying.
93
00:04:56,960 --> 00:04:57,959
I'm sorry? Your mother told me
94
00:04:57,960 --> 00:05:00,959
she can't drink at the moment
because she's on warfarin.
95
00:05:00,960 --> 00:05:02,959
Plus, you need to learn
to empty the recycling!
96
00:05:02,960 --> 00:05:04,960
You weren't fit to
be on call, Guy.
97
00:05:05,960 --> 00:05:07,959
Mummy, it's the scary bit.
98
00:05:07,960 --> 00:05:10,959
Please can you watch it
with us? Yeah, course.
99
00:05:10,960 --> 00:05:12,959
Look, here's your hot milk, OK?
100
00:05:12,960 --> 00:05:14,960
Come on, I'll forward it on.
101
00:05:38,960 --> 00:05:40,960
Guy...
102
00:05:42,960 --> 00:05:44,960
Just talk to me, please.
103
00:05:51,960 --> 00:05:52,959
You need help.
104
00:05:52,960 --> 00:05:54,960
I do NOT need help.
GLASS SHATTERS
105
00:05:56,960 --> 00:05:58,319
It's OK. Just don't.
106
00:05:58,320 --> 00:05:59,639
Just leave it.
107
00:05:59,640 --> 00:06:00,999
What was that,
Mummy? Fuck's sake.
108
00:06:01,000 --> 00:06:04,640
It's all right, Mags. Can you
just stay up there, please?
109
00:06:07,960 --> 00:06:09,960
You done?
110
00:06:23,960 --> 00:06:28,320
TANNOY: 'Flight RY35 from Shannon
is now delayed by 25 minutes.'
111
00:06:33,960 --> 00:06:36,639
Hi!
112
00:06:36,640 --> 00:06:38,159
Oh, hi.
113
00:06:38,160 --> 00:06:41,959
Hi! Aw, look!
114
00:06:41,960 --> 00:06:43,959
Everything OK? Oh,
yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
115
00:06:43,960 --> 00:06:45,799
Yeah, we had a great time.
116
00:06:45,800 --> 00:06:48,319
Aw, I'm so pleased. You
heading straight back?
117
00:06:48,320 --> 00:06:50,960
Er, well, half an hour.
118
00:06:51,960 --> 00:06:52,960
So...
119
00:06:53,960 --> 00:06:55,959
You, er... all
ready for tomorrow?
120
00:06:55,960 --> 00:06:59,959
Absolutely. Mama's
gonna smash it!
121
00:06:59,960 --> 00:07:01,959
ELIS WAILING
122
00:07:01,960 --> 00:07:03,959
SHE SIGHS
123
00:07:03,960 --> 00:07:04,959
For protracted ileus,
124
00:07:04,960 --> 00:07:07,959
mechanical obstruction
should be excluded by CT scan
125
00:07:07,960 --> 00:07:11,959
and underlying
electrolyte abnor...
126
00:07:11,960 --> 00:07:13,959
ELIS SOBBING
127
00:07:13,960 --> 00:07:15,959
Come on. WAILING CONTINUES
128
00:07:15,960 --> 00:07:17,959
Come closer.
129
00:07:17,960 --> 00:07:19,959
Would you...? WAILING
130
00:07:19,960 --> 00:07:22,959
Oh. No.
131
00:07:22,960 --> 00:07:24,960
Oh! ELIS SCREAMING
132
00:07:34,960 --> 00:07:37,959
RSV, RSV, RSV...
133
00:07:37,960 --> 00:07:39,959
Ooh! Bronch.
134
00:07:39,960 --> 00:07:42,959
Bronch is RSV. Just
trying to liven things up.
135
00:07:42,960 --> 00:07:44,960
Can I leave you with
the labour ward bleep?
136
00:07:45,960 --> 00:07:47,800
Who's eaten half of these?
137
00:07:48,960 --> 00:07:51,319
Er, Susan, I-I can't
do this tonight.
138
00:07:51,320 --> 00:07:52,959
Well, Xavi's not sleeping.
139
00:07:52,960 --> 00:07:54,959
You're not still
breast-feeding, are you?
140
00:07:54,960 --> 00:07:57,959
If you stop breast-feeding him,
he will sleep through the night.
141
00:07:57,960 --> 00:07:58,959
Look, I'm a reg
down on the rota.
142
00:07:58,960 --> 00:08:01,800
I can't cover every
hole in the rota.
143
00:08:03,000 --> 00:08:05,959
Well, the only other
option's Mae, and, honestly,
144
00:08:05,960 --> 00:08:08,159
I think it's too much
responsibility for her.
145
00:08:08,160 --> 00:08:10,960
She doesn't have the
neonatal experience.
146
00:08:23,960 --> 00:08:25,959
You have to tell
someone. I can't.
147
00:08:25,960 --> 00:08:28,959
You have to speak to his manager.
He's putting people at risk.
148
00:08:28,960 --> 00:08:30,959
This isn't an interview
scenario, Jack.
149
00:08:30,960 --> 00:08:33,959
When it comes out - and
it always comes out -
150
00:08:33,960 --> 00:08:35,959
and when they find out
you've been covering...
151
00:08:35,960 --> 00:08:37,959
I'm not... I'm not
covering for him.
152
00:08:37,960 --> 00:08:39,959
..you'll be the one facing
disciplinary action.
153
00:08:39,960 --> 00:08:40,959
He'll get rehab
154
00:08:40,960 --> 00:08:42,959
and a weekly appointment
with Occupational Health.
155
00:08:42,960 --> 00:08:44,959
He's my husband.
156
00:08:44,960 --> 00:08:47,959
If he gets suspended, then
who pays our mortgage?
157
00:08:47,960 --> 00:08:49,159
Who explains to my five-year-old
158
00:08:49,160 --> 00:08:51,959
why Mummy and Daddy aren't
living together any more?
159
00:08:51,960 --> 00:08:52,959
But he can't keep drinking.
160
00:08:52,960 --> 00:08:54,160
I know.
161
00:08:55,960 --> 00:08:57,160
I-I know that.
162
00:08:59,960 --> 00:09:01,960
Oh, I don't know what to do.
163
00:09:02,960 --> 00:09:04,639
Sorry, I...
164
00:09:04,640 --> 00:09:06,960
I don't think he's left
you with much choice.
165
00:09:09,960 --> 00:09:12,959
I know. I know. ELIS CRYING
166
00:09:12,960 --> 00:09:16,959
I know. Oh, come on, Elis.
Come on, sweetie pie.
167
00:09:16,960 --> 00:09:19,639
Fine. Fine. I know.
ELIS SPLUTTERING
168
00:09:19,640 --> 00:09:21,959
I know.
169
00:09:21,960 --> 00:09:23,959
PHONE RINGS
170
00:09:23,960 --> 00:09:25,159
CAU.
171
00:09:25,160 --> 00:09:26,999
CATHERINE: 'Her
temperature is still 39.'
172
00:09:27,000 --> 00:09:29,959
OK, Catherine, like I
said before, it's RSV.
173
00:09:29,960 --> 00:09:32,319
If she's struggling to
breathe, then bring her in.
174
00:09:32,320 --> 00:09:33,959
'Can I bring her in
so YOU can tell me
175
00:09:33,960 --> 00:09:35,319
'if she's struggling
for breath?'
176
00:09:35,320 --> 00:09:36,959
Look, I know this
is scary... BEEPER
177
00:09:36,960 --> 00:09:38,959
..but you're doing brilliantly.
178
00:09:38,960 --> 00:09:41,959
'Can I push the Calpol to,
like, every two hours?' No.
179
00:09:41,960 --> 00:09:43,959
Mae, can you come with
me to the labour ward?
180
00:09:43,960 --> 00:09:46,960
If you're going, I need
to stay. Take Simon.
181
00:09:49,960 --> 00:09:52,959
WOMAN GRUNTING
182
00:09:52,960 --> 00:09:55,159
SHE GROANS Don't touch me!
183
00:09:55,160 --> 00:09:57,959
I don't want any
of you touching me!
184
00:09:57,960 --> 00:09:58,959
Calm down now.
185
00:09:58,960 --> 00:10:00,959
Let's get these on you.
Let us help you, Layla.
186
00:10:00,960 --> 00:10:02,959
Oh, God.
187
00:10:02,960 --> 00:10:05,959
I want her to stay in me!
What's your management plan?
188
00:10:05,960 --> 00:10:07,959
Can you feel another
contraction coming? Er...
189
00:10:07,960 --> 00:10:10,959
Layla? I know what you're
doing. I know what you're doing!
190
00:10:10,960 --> 00:10:14,319
Let NICU know to expect a
premmie with prenatal drug use.
191
00:10:14,320 --> 00:10:18,639
Er, suspected NAS?
192
00:10:18,640 --> 00:10:21,479
So that they can start
monitoring a-and the other stuff.
193
00:10:21,480 --> 00:10:22,959
I don't want this!
Which is what?
194
00:10:22,960 --> 00:10:25,959
Stop touching me! Depends
on the monitoring.
195
00:10:25,960 --> 00:10:28,959
Stop fighting us, Layla. You're
gonna hurt yourself and the baby.
196
00:10:28,960 --> 00:10:30,959
What baby's... would be... L...
197
00:10:30,960 --> 00:10:32,959
Lipsitz? ..Lipsitz scores are.
198
00:10:32,960 --> 00:10:34,959
If they shows signs
of opioid withdrawal,
199
00:10:34,960 --> 00:10:36,959
treat with morphine. I'm
gonna be a good mother.
200
00:10:36,960 --> 00:10:38,959
You missed an immediate
start on antibiotics
201
00:10:38,960 --> 00:10:40,959
due to maternal risk
factor of substance abuse.
202
00:10:40,960 --> 00:10:42,959
We don't know what
the substance is.
203
00:10:42,960 --> 00:10:44,799
So call the NICU, look
up the NAS guidelines.
204
00:10:44,800 --> 00:10:46,159
Here comes another one, Layla.
205
00:10:46,160 --> 00:10:47,959
Big push now.
206
00:10:47,960 --> 00:10:48,959
LAYLA GROANS
207
00:10:48,960 --> 00:10:51,959
Nearly there, one more
big push. LAYLA SCREAMS
208
00:10:51,960 --> 00:10:55,960
GROANING AND SCREAMING
209
00:10:59,960 --> 00:11:00,959
LAYLA GRUNTS
210
00:11:00,960 --> 00:11:03,959
Let me hold her! Don't...
Don't take her away!
211
00:11:03,960 --> 00:11:05,319
Calm down. Just give her back!
212
00:11:05,320 --> 00:11:07,959
Please just let me have her.
I'll do better this time.
213
00:11:07,960 --> 00:11:08,959
Please!
214
00:11:08,960 --> 00:11:10,959
Just let me hold her, please!
215
00:11:10,960 --> 00:11:13,959
You know we can't
do that, Layla.
216
00:11:13,960 --> 00:11:14,959
Shall we try oxygen?
217
00:11:14,960 --> 00:11:16,959
Yep. I'm her mother!
218
00:11:16,960 --> 00:11:19,319
Who takes a baby
from their mother?!
219
00:11:19,320 --> 00:11:21,959
You bitch! OK, increase
the pressure a bit.
220
00:11:21,960 --> 00:11:24,159
Just get off me!
That's it. Bitch!
221
00:11:24,160 --> 00:11:26,959
LAYLA CRIES OUT
222
00:11:26,960 --> 00:11:28,959
She's breathing.
Well done, love.
223
00:11:28,960 --> 00:11:31,959
Get the lines in. You
did this! You took her!
224
00:11:31,960 --> 00:11:33,959
And you!
225
00:11:33,960 --> 00:11:35,959
I will NEVER forgive you.
226
00:11:35,960 --> 00:11:38,960
LAYLA SOBBING
227
00:11:40,960 --> 00:11:44,959
LAYLA SOBBING Please, please...
228
00:11:44,960 --> 00:11:47,959
Get the NAS scores.
229
00:11:47,960 --> 00:11:51,959
What, do you mean go
with her now, or...
230
00:11:51,960 --> 00:11:53,959
wait for 72 hours?
231
00:11:53,960 --> 00:11:55,960
Dr Afridi?
232
00:11:58,960 --> 00:12:01,480
BREATHING QUICKLY
233
00:12:06,960 --> 00:12:11,959
Er, Dr Afridi, do you
mean go now, or...?
234
00:12:11,960 --> 00:12:14,960
PANICKED BREATHING
235
00:12:25,320 --> 00:12:26,960
Maryam?
236
00:12:39,160 --> 00:12:41,320
PHONE RINGS
237
00:12:42,960 --> 00:12:43,959
Hello?
238
00:12:43,960 --> 00:12:45,959
It's Laura from Theatres.
Just letting you know
239
00:12:45,960 --> 00:12:47,959
I've squeezed in an
appendicectomy at nine,
240
00:12:47,960 --> 00:12:50,319
'just in case you were aiming
for...' Laura, what, sorry?
241
00:12:50,320 --> 00:12:52,959
No, I'm not working today.
I requested it as holiday.
242
00:12:52,960 --> 00:12:53,959
Er, no, you're on today,
243
00:12:53,960 --> 00:12:55,959
and you have an appendicectomy
from the CEPOD list.
244
00:12:55,960 --> 00:12:57,959
No, I filled out
the holiday form.
245
00:12:57,960 --> 00:12:59,959
'I sent it to you.'
246
00:12:59,960 --> 00:13:01,480
I'm sure I got a
response. Hold on.
247
00:13:05,960 --> 00:13:07,959
ELIS BABBLING
248
00:13:07,960 --> 00:13:10,319
Laura, help. I'm so
sorry, it didn't...
249
00:13:10,320 --> 00:13:11,959
Look, I can't work today.
250
00:13:11,960 --> 00:13:13,959
It's interview day, my
interview's at four.
251
00:13:13,960 --> 00:13:14,999
They put you last, then?
252
00:13:15,000 --> 00:13:17,799
Please, someone else
has got to take it.
253
00:13:17,800 --> 00:13:19,799
You've been begging me
for the surgical hours.
254
00:13:19,800 --> 00:13:21,959
Yes, just not today!
255
00:13:21,960 --> 00:13:23,959
'There isn't anyone else,
so unless you're ill...'
256
00:13:23,960 --> 00:13:25,959
I'm really ill. Horribly ill.
257
00:13:25,960 --> 00:13:28,960
I'll tell them you can't make
your interview, then, shall I?
258
00:13:30,800 --> 00:13:31,960
Hello?
259
00:13:32,960 --> 00:13:33,959
How long's the list?
260
00:13:33,960 --> 00:13:36,960
You should be done by
three. See you in an hour.
261
00:13:44,960 --> 00:13:48,959
I need you to pull it together.
You can't be ill today.
262
00:13:48,960 --> 00:13:50,959
♪ What d'you know about me?
263
00:13:50,960 --> 00:13:52,959
♪ What d'you know about me now?
264
00:13:52,960 --> 00:13:54,959
♪ What d'you know about me? ♪
265
00:13:54,960 --> 00:13:57,159
She was up a bit in the
night, she's a bit tired.
266
00:13:57,160 --> 00:13:59,959
Not temperature, or anything,
probably just teething.
267
00:13:59,960 --> 00:14:01,959
ELIS WAILS You know
I'm a doctor, right?
268
00:14:01,960 --> 00:14:04,639
Great. Yeah. OK,
well, bye. Bye, Elis!
269
00:14:04,640 --> 00:14:06,959
♪ What d'you know about me?
270
00:14:06,960 --> 00:14:08,959
♪ Think you got the warning
271
00:14:08,960 --> 00:14:10,959
♪ That's what you don't say... ♪
272
00:14:10,960 --> 00:14:13,000
SHE EXHALES
273
00:14:16,960 --> 00:14:18,959
KNOCK ON WINDOW
274
00:14:18,960 --> 00:14:20,959
She's got a temperature.
275
00:14:20,960 --> 00:14:22,959
♪ What d'you know about me now?
276
00:14:22,960 --> 00:14:24,959
♪ What d'you know about me?
277
00:14:24,960 --> 00:14:26,959
♪ What d'you know about me now?
278
00:14:26,960 --> 00:14:28,959
♪ What d'you know about me?
279
00:14:28,960 --> 00:14:30,959
♪ What d'you know
about me now? ♪
280
00:14:30,960 --> 00:14:32,959
I-I know that.
281
00:14:32,960 --> 00:14:35,960
I know that, Mum.
I really would...
282
00:14:37,960 --> 00:14:39,960
Yeah. Yeah.
283
00:14:41,960 --> 00:14:43,959
ELIS FUSSING
284
00:14:43,960 --> 00:14:44,999
You hold her till I
find someone else,
285
00:14:45,000 --> 00:14:46,960
or you remove an
appendix. Your call.
286
00:14:51,960 --> 00:14:52,959
Mum?
287
00:14:52,960 --> 00:14:54,959
Yeah, Mum. I'm begging you.
288
00:14:54,960 --> 00:14:56,960
Please get on that train now.
289
00:14:59,960 --> 00:15:01,959
HELEN: Is there enough
milk in that for you?
290
00:15:01,960 --> 00:15:03,959
We could, er...
291
00:15:03,960 --> 00:15:07,479
We could go to the funeral
place tomorrow if you're free?
292
00:15:07,480 --> 00:15:09,159
Can we, like...
293
00:15:09,160 --> 00:15:10,960
What's the word?
294
00:15:11,960 --> 00:15:13,959
..burn her? SHE COUGHS
295
00:15:13,960 --> 00:15:16,960
Not, like, burn her
like she's a witch.
296
00:15:18,160 --> 00:15:19,999
I was thinking we need
to contact her dad.
297
00:15:20,000 --> 00:15:22,959
Your dad. Tell him.
298
00:15:22,960 --> 00:15:24,319
I'm not speaking to him.
299
00:15:24,320 --> 00:15:26,319
He needs to know.
He was her dad.
300
00:15:26,320 --> 00:15:27,959
She wouldn't want him there.
301
00:15:27,960 --> 00:15:29,959
It's not about what she
wants any more, is it?
302
00:15:29,960 --> 00:15:31,480
OK, I don't want him there.
303
00:15:36,960 --> 00:15:38,959
SHE SIGHS
304
00:15:38,960 --> 00:15:40,959
It wasn't your mum's fault.
305
00:15:40,960 --> 00:15:43,959
Yeah, it were. We
tried to help her.
306
00:15:43,960 --> 00:15:46,959
You tried, I tried my whole
life, did nothing but try.
307
00:15:46,960 --> 00:15:49,959
OK, but your mum was like she was
because our dad was like he was.
308
00:15:49,960 --> 00:15:53,479
It's just cycles
of this bullshit.
309
00:15:53,480 --> 00:15:56,000
Exactly. It wasn't just her
life she was tearing up, was it?
310
00:16:01,960 --> 00:16:05,959
SOBBING: I can't believe
this is happening to me!
311
00:16:05,960 --> 00:16:06,959
Jessica?
312
00:16:06,960 --> 00:16:09,959
I'm Catherine MacDiarmid.
I'm your surgeon today.
313
00:16:09,960 --> 00:16:11,959
I see you're struggling
with the pain.
314
00:16:11,960 --> 00:16:15,319
I'm meant to be getting
married in 60 hours!
315
00:16:15,320 --> 00:16:17,959
I'm literally meant to be
at the tanning place now.
316
00:16:17,960 --> 00:16:18,959
Do you have insurance?
317
00:16:18,960 --> 00:16:20,799
No!
318
00:16:20,800 --> 00:16:23,319
We're never gonna get
the '90s band again!
319
00:16:23,320 --> 00:16:25,959
Two years we've
been planning this.
320
00:16:25,960 --> 00:16:28,639
WAILS: It's the
biggest day of my life!
321
00:16:28,640 --> 00:16:30,960
It's not. Most expensive, maybe.
322
00:16:31,960 --> 00:16:33,959
But I'm gonna have a scar!
323
00:16:33,960 --> 00:16:35,959
It's keyhole surgery.
324
00:16:35,960 --> 00:16:37,959
But you'll see it
when I'm in my dress.
325
00:16:37,960 --> 00:16:41,159
Oh, no, it will just be
here, just a tiny incision...
326
00:16:41,160 --> 00:16:43,159
You'll see what you
had for lunch in that.
327
00:16:43,160 --> 00:16:44,959
I wanna die!
328
00:16:44,960 --> 00:16:46,959
OK, Jessica, that's enough!
329
00:16:46,960 --> 00:16:49,959
You're gonna man up,
we're gonna put you under,
330
00:16:49,960 --> 00:16:51,959
and I'm gonna have you
out of here by tomorrow
331
00:16:51,960 --> 00:16:54,479
with some decent painkillers.
Those and a glass of Champagne,
332
00:16:54,480 --> 00:16:56,959
and it might just be the
best day of your life.
333
00:16:56,960 --> 00:16:57,959
We can still get married?
334
00:16:57,960 --> 00:16:59,960
I've got my lucky pants on.
335
00:17:12,960 --> 00:17:15,960
FAINT VOICES OUTSIDE
336
00:17:18,960 --> 00:17:20,960
AEROPLANE OVERHEAD
337
00:17:36,960 --> 00:17:38,960
You OK?
338
00:17:58,960 --> 00:18:01,160
Please don't say
anything to anyone.
339
00:18:29,960 --> 00:18:31,959
'Hi. You've reached
Catherine MacDiarmid.
340
00:18:31,960 --> 00:18:34,320
'I can't take your call just...'
341
00:18:36,960 --> 00:18:37,959
Hi, Mum, it's me again.
342
00:18:37,960 --> 00:18:42,640
Be good to know where you are.
Hopefully, you're in a tunnel.
343
00:18:45,960 --> 00:18:47,159
I have a meeting now.
344
00:18:47,160 --> 00:18:49,799
The interview is in an hour.
345
00:18:49,800 --> 00:18:52,959
I'm not operating, fair enough,
but I am an important cog
346
00:18:52,960 --> 00:18:54,959
in this wheel of patient
quality and care.
347
00:18:54,960 --> 00:18:58,959
She's lovely, but it's also
very hard to get anything done.
348
00:18:58,960 --> 00:19:00,959
No, really (?)
349
00:19:00,960 --> 00:19:02,959
ELIS CRYING OK, you're tired.
350
00:19:02,960 --> 00:19:04,639
Good luck in there.
351
00:19:04,640 --> 00:19:06,080
Be nice to have more
women in charge.
352
00:19:07,960 --> 00:19:09,159
Thank you, you've
been lovely. Oh!
353
00:19:09,160 --> 00:19:12,639
ELIS COUGHS Oh, dear,
how are you feeling, huh?
354
00:19:12,640 --> 00:19:15,159
ELIS RETCHES Oh,
no. Oh, Elis, no!
355
00:19:15,160 --> 00:19:16,799
ELIS WAILING
356
00:19:16,800 --> 00:19:18,959
SONG: 'Blow' by lau. ra
357
00:19:18,960 --> 00:19:21,959
♪ When they asking who's the star
You can tell them that I'm next... ♪
358
00:19:21,960 --> 00:19:24,959
ELIS CRYING
359
00:19:24,960 --> 00:19:27,959
♪ I don't go looking
for No karma... ♪
360
00:19:27,960 --> 00:19:29,959
CRYING
361
00:19:29,960 --> 00:19:31,959
♪ You live with an illusion
362
00:19:31,960 --> 00:19:35,479
♪ They wanna hear me scream
They wanna see me cry... ♪
363
00:19:35,480 --> 00:19:38,959
WAILING
364
00:19:38,960 --> 00:19:42,639
♪ Baby, I'm about to blow... ♪
365
00:19:42,640 --> 00:19:43,959
Looking very dapper!
366
00:19:43,960 --> 00:19:47,959
Just had my interview for
consultant. Oh. Go well?
367
00:19:47,960 --> 00:19:50,959
Yeah, I think so. Well, you
certainly look the part.
368
00:19:50,960 --> 00:19:53,319
I'm sorry, by the way.
369
00:19:53,320 --> 00:19:54,959
For your loss.
370
00:19:54,960 --> 00:19:55,960
What's that?
371
00:19:57,480 --> 00:19:58,800
For, erm...
372
00:20:00,960 --> 00:20:02,959
Sorry, I'm confusing you with...
373
00:20:02,960 --> 00:20:03,959
Never mind, way too much
374
00:20:03,960 --> 00:20:05,959
"trust priorities and
leadership strategies"
375
00:20:05,960 --> 00:20:06,999
running through my head.
376
00:20:07,000 --> 00:20:09,959
Don't worry, you can forget
about those almost immediately.
377
00:20:09,960 --> 00:20:12,160
Well, ignore me. Sorry.
378
00:20:16,960 --> 00:20:20,959
♪ They wanna hear me scream
They wanna see me cry
379
00:20:20,960 --> 00:20:22,959
♪ They're mad
they're not about to
380
00:20:22,960 --> 00:20:24,960
♪ Look at me, I got so high... ♪
381
00:20:25,960 --> 00:20:27,959
SHE SIGHS
382
00:20:27,960 --> 00:20:30,959
I know. Is that what
you were wearing before?
383
00:20:30,960 --> 00:20:33,959
She puked over it. Oh. Ugh.
384
00:20:33,960 --> 00:20:35,159
Take her.
385
00:20:35,160 --> 00:20:37,959
Catherine, I can't, my inbox
is... My mum is on her way.
386
00:20:37,960 --> 00:20:40,479
Please, please, Laura.
I-I'm up any minute.
387
00:20:40,480 --> 00:20:43,959
I will never give you a hard time
about a list ever, ever again.
388
00:20:43,960 --> 00:20:45,959
ELIS CRIES Ever?
389
00:20:45,960 --> 00:20:47,639
You're on the panel, aren't you?
390
00:20:47,640 --> 00:20:49,959
Can we talk about this
later? I'm just on my way in.
391
00:20:49,960 --> 00:20:51,959
Why would you do something so
stupid? I'm trying to help.
392
00:20:51,960 --> 00:20:54,639
I honestly don't think you've
got anything to worry about.
393
00:20:54,640 --> 00:20:57,319
It's the classic Swiss Cheese
model of accident causation.
394
00:20:57,320 --> 00:20:59,959
You know that "learning from
the no-blame culture" stuff
395
00:20:59,960 --> 00:21:00,959
is bollocks, don't you?
396
00:21:00,960 --> 00:21:03,959
No, I-I honestly think
it was systems failures.
397
00:21:03,960 --> 00:21:05,959
Right. Which system
in particular?
398
00:21:05,960 --> 00:21:07,959
The childcare system,
staff shortages,
399
00:21:07,960 --> 00:21:10,959
the public school system, austerity,
or just the patriarchy in general?
400
00:21:10,960 --> 00:21:12,959
Or are they gonna throw
someone under the bus?
401
00:21:12,960 --> 00:21:14,959
I'm not throwing
you under any buses.
402
00:21:14,960 --> 00:21:16,959
I need this to stop. I just
need all of this to stop.
403
00:21:16,960 --> 00:21:18,639
Maz, breathe.
404
00:21:18,640 --> 00:21:21,159
Come on, calm.
405
00:21:21,160 --> 00:21:23,960
Breathe. Miss MacDiarmid?
406
00:21:26,160 --> 00:21:27,959
I have to go. Please.
407
00:21:27,960 --> 00:21:30,959
Please take your
name off the panel.
408
00:21:30,960 --> 00:21:32,959
I can't, it's too late.
409
00:21:32,960 --> 00:21:34,959
I'm sorry, I've got to go.
410
00:21:34,960 --> 00:21:37,960
Can you call someone? Or
could you... could you wait?
411
00:21:38,960 --> 00:21:40,960
Maz?
412
00:22:29,960 --> 00:22:31,959
I need to report that my...
413
00:22:31,960 --> 00:22:34,320
consultant has been
drinking on call.
414
00:22:36,800 --> 00:22:38,959
Guy.
415
00:22:38,960 --> 00:22:41,640
Guy has been drinking on call.
416
00:22:46,480 --> 00:22:47,960
SCREAMING
417
00:22:50,960 --> 00:22:51,960
Bitch!
418
00:22:53,960 --> 00:22:55,959
HORN HONKS
419
00:22:55,960 --> 00:22:57,959
SIRENS
420
00:22:57,960 --> 00:23:01,960
BREATHING HEAVILY
421
00:23:07,960 --> 00:23:09,959
Is there anyone here
you haven't met?
422
00:23:09,960 --> 00:23:11,959
I think I got around to
everybody, just about.
423
00:23:11,960 --> 00:23:13,959
Even if briefly.
424
00:23:13,960 --> 00:23:15,959
I understand you had
a list this morning?
425
00:23:15,960 --> 00:23:19,479
Two appendixes, two hernias
and some gallstones.
426
00:23:19,480 --> 00:23:20,959
My pager is on, I'm afraid.
427
00:23:20,960 --> 00:23:23,639
ALL CHUCKLE Well, then,
we'd better get started.
428
00:23:23,640 --> 00:23:25,959
BABY CRYING
429
00:23:25,960 --> 00:23:28,999
So, how does your training
meet the needs of this post?
430
00:23:29,000 --> 00:23:32,479
I was lucky enough to
sub-specialise in trauma surgery
431
00:23:32,480 --> 00:23:34,959
in addition to my general
surgery pathway training,
432
00:23:34,960 --> 00:23:36,959
and I spent six months...
433
00:23:36,960 --> 00:23:38,960
BABY STOPS CRYING
434
00:23:40,960 --> 00:23:42,800
Miss MacDiarmid?
435
00:23:43,960 --> 00:23:46,159
I had the opportunity
to spend six months
436
00:23:46,160 --> 00:23:48,960
at a county hospital
in Oklahoma.
437
00:24:07,800 --> 00:24:11,799
I think it demonstrated not only
how keen my surgical instincts are,
438
00:24:11,800 --> 00:24:15,319
the procedure itself was executed
perfectly and saved the boy's life,
439
00:24:15,320 --> 00:24:17,959
but how well I react
to the unexpected.
440
00:24:17,960 --> 00:24:20,959
And most surgery is
clean, calm, controlled.
441
00:24:20,960 --> 00:24:23,959
When we're in charge, we
have time to prep, to plan.
442
00:24:23,960 --> 00:24:26,959
But the step up from
registrar to consultant is,
443
00:24:26,960 --> 00:24:30,959
in addition to surgical
competency, about management.
444
00:24:30,960 --> 00:24:32,959
Managing human beings,
445
00:24:32,960 --> 00:24:34,959
fighting for your patients
and your department.
446
00:24:34,960 --> 00:24:40,960
That can be a far less
controllable, much messier business.
447
00:24:42,960 --> 00:24:44,960
And one I'm
absolutely ready for.
448
00:24:46,960 --> 00:24:49,959
So, apart from the
clamshell thoracotomy,
449
00:24:49,960 --> 00:24:52,639
which we've heard
a lot about today,
450
00:24:52,640 --> 00:24:54,959
which experiences
outside of medicine
451
00:24:54,960 --> 00:24:57,959
have proved useful in
your surgical career?
452
00:24:57,960 --> 00:25:01,320
Like my hobbies?
SCATTERED CHUCKLING
453
00:25:03,960 --> 00:25:04,999
Oh.
454
00:25:05,000 --> 00:25:08,799
Oh, well, my academic record,
455
00:25:08,800 --> 00:25:11,960
and work ethic haven't
left much room for...
456
00:25:12,960 --> 00:25:14,320
..distractions.
457
00:25:16,320 --> 00:25:17,960
Nothing else in your life, then?
458
00:25:23,960 --> 00:25:25,959
WOMAN, MUFFLED: Can you tell
us about a serious complication
459
00:25:25,960 --> 00:25:27,000
and how you dealt with it?
460
00:25:29,960 --> 00:25:31,960
I'm sorry, would you mind
repeating the question?
461
00:25:32,960 --> 00:25:35,959
Can you tell us about
a serious complication
462
00:25:35,960 --> 00:25:36,959
and how you dealt with it?
463
00:25:36,960 --> 00:25:38,959
Yes.
464
00:25:38,960 --> 00:25:40,959
A few weeks ago, I delivered
a baby at 32 weeks,
465
00:25:40,960 --> 00:25:43,959
rather unexpectedly, after
a gall bladder removal.
466
00:25:43,960 --> 00:25:46,959
And was that a complication
or a coincidence?
467
00:25:46,960 --> 00:25:49,959
Did your procedure
actuate labour? No.
468
00:25:49,960 --> 00:25:52,959
Well... I don't know, the
causes of pre-term labour
469
00:25:52,960 --> 00:25:55,639
after abdominal surgery
are still largely unknown.
470
00:25:55,640 --> 00:25:57,800
I'm aware. Thank you.
471
00:25:58,960 --> 00:25:59,959
How's baby doing now?
472
00:25:59,960 --> 00:26:02,959
It was fine when I handed
it to the obstetrician.
473
00:26:02,960 --> 00:26:04,960
To the paediatrician, surely?
474
00:26:05,960 --> 00:26:07,959
Er, thank you,
Professor, you're right.
475
00:26:07,960 --> 00:26:11,959
That wasn't a clear case
of a complication, erm...
476
00:26:11,960 --> 00:26:13,799
Oh, last year, I had a...
477
00:26:13,800 --> 00:26:16,959
Nothing more recent?
No, because I was on...
478
00:26:16,960 --> 00:26:19,320
The pandemic's caused such
disruption to elective surgeries.
479
00:26:21,960 --> 00:26:22,960
Mm.
480
00:26:25,960 --> 00:26:27,960
A VTE in a 40-year-old male.
481
00:26:47,960 --> 00:26:49,959
Oh, can I get your help
with this referral?
482
00:26:49,960 --> 00:26:51,959
You'll have to ask
someone else, I'm afraid.
483
00:26:51,960 --> 00:26:53,960
Why, where are you going?
I've been suspended.
484
00:26:55,960 --> 00:26:59,960
I... What's happened?
Guy, what can I do?
485
00:27:02,000 --> 00:27:04,480
Was it because of us?
There is no "us", Louise.
486
00:27:05,960 --> 00:27:08,959
Did Helen find out?
487
00:27:08,960 --> 00:27:10,959
Guy... I told Helen almost
as soon as it happened
488
00:27:10,960 --> 00:27:12,960
because it was the biggest
mistake of my life.
489
00:27:14,320 --> 00:27:16,959
Just leave me alone.
490
00:27:16,960 --> 00:27:18,960
LIFT: Floor two.
491
00:27:20,960 --> 00:27:22,959
This lift is going down.
Well... What do I...
492
00:27:22,960 --> 00:27:24,959
What do I tell everyone
about where you are?
493
00:27:24,960 --> 00:27:27,960
Doors closing. Guy?
494
00:27:43,960 --> 00:27:45,800
Doors opening.
495
00:27:57,320 --> 00:28:00,960
And, yeah, the
sides. Missed a bit.
496
00:28:04,960 --> 00:28:06,999
Those lucky pants
did the trick, then?
497
00:28:07,000 --> 00:28:09,959
PHONE RINGS
498
00:28:09,960 --> 00:28:11,479
Sorry.
499
00:28:11,480 --> 00:28:14,959
Babes, it's done.
No, it's all out.
500
00:28:14,960 --> 00:28:16,800
It's like nothing ever happened.
501
00:28:17,960 --> 00:28:20,959
I had the most amazing surgeon.
502
00:28:20,960 --> 00:28:22,960
Yes!
503
00:28:24,480 --> 00:28:28,959
HELEN: "With zigzag lightning,
flashing and frightening,
504
00:28:28,960 --> 00:28:32,960
"the tiny snail on the
tail of the whale...
505
00:28:34,960 --> 00:28:38,960
"and she gazed at the
sky, the sea, the land...
506
00:28:41,320 --> 00:28:45,960
"the waves and the caves
and the golden sand.
507
00:28:52,960 --> 00:28:56,959
"She gazed and gazed,
amazed by it all,
508
00:28:56,960 --> 00:28:59,960
"and she said to the whale...
509
00:29:01,480 --> 00:29:04,160
"I feel so small."
510
00:29:17,960 --> 00:29:20,959
This is Dr Maryam Afridi on CAU.
I was just following up on a baby
511
00:29:20,960 --> 00:29:24,959
I treated in the delivery
suite last night, baby Kalpar.
512
00:29:24,960 --> 00:29:27,200
Could someone check the latest
NAS scores for me, please?
513
00:29:28,960 --> 00:29:31,960
She's scoring fives
and sixes. So far.
514
00:29:33,000 --> 00:29:34,960
Er, no. That's OK, thanks.
515
00:29:36,160 --> 00:29:37,960
Thank you.
516
00:29:39,320 --> 00:29:41,959
So, are they going to give
her a big whack of morphine?
517
00:29:41,960 --> 00:29:43,959
It's a rough start.
518
00:29:43,960 --> 00:29:45,959
Listen, erm, Simon,
about last night...
519
00:29:45,960 --> 00:29:47,160
I'm not gonna say anything.
520
00:29:50,000 --> 00:29:52,960
I think... I think you need to.
521
00:30:05,160 --> 00:30:07,960
Shh, shh, shh...
BABY WAILS, COUGHS
522
00:30:10,960 --> 00:30:13,639
She was making this horrible
noise when she breathed in.
523
00:30:13,640 --> 00:30:15,959
God, I don't know what to do.
524
00:30:15,960 --> 00:30:19,959
All the germs on the plane.
Or a protest at going away.
525
00:30:19,960 --> 00:30:22,960
How is making me feel guilty
a useful thing right now?
526
00:30:26,000 --> 00:30:28,160
What's her temperature? 39.2.
527
00:30:29,160 --> 00:30:31,639
Is that wheezing her
struggling to breathe?
528
00:30:31,640 --> 00:30:32,960
Like that, listen.
529
00:30:34,960 --> 00:30:36,159
Shit, we need to
take her to A&E.
530
00:30:36,160 --> 00:30:38,959
No, no, stay calm. Come
on, let her calm down.
531
00:30:38,960 --> 00:30:41,959
Shh, shh, shh...
532
00:30:41,960 --> 00:30:46,959
CATHERINE MURMURS,
BABY ATTEMPTS TO COUGH
533
00:30:46,960 --> 00:30:48,480
That's croup.
534
00:30:49,480 --> 00:30:50,959
Isn't that a card game?
535
00:30:50,960 --> 00:30:53,959
It's a respiratory
infection, you had it.
536
00:30:53,960 --> 00:30:56,959
Look, go and stand outside with
her, get her some cool air.
537
00:30:56,960 --> 00:30:58,959
I'll get some steam
going in the bathroom.
538
00:30:58,960 --> 00:31:00,959
BABY CRIES
539
00:31:00,960 --> 00:31:02,479
I think we should call 111.
540
00:31:02,480 --> 00:31:04,959
If you like, but describe
that cough to them.
541
00:31:04,960 --> 00:31:06,959
Go and stand on the
doorstep with her.
542
00:31:06,960 --> 00:31:09,800
OK, I'm going. We are going.
543
00:31:45,960 --> 00:31:47,800
Don't wait up.
544
00:31:49,960 --> 00:31:51,959
We can talk in the morning
when you've sobered up.
545
00:31:51,960 --> 00:31:52,959
I'm gonna be in the guest room.
546
00:31:52,960 --> 00:31:55,959
I told them where to stick it.
547
00:31:55,960 --> 00:31:58,959
Yeah. Yeah, no, I heard.
548
00:31:58,960 --> 00:32:01,960
You must be feeling very
pleased with yourself.
549
00:32:02,960 --> 00:32:04,960
My sister died.
550
00:32:05,960 --> 00:32:08,639
St Harry's called me
at work to tell me,
551
00:32:08,640 --> 00:32:09,959
and I couldn't go
and be with her
552
00:32:09,960 --> 00:32:12,960
because you weren't fit to
come in and cover for me.
553
00:32:16,960 --> 00:32:18,959
How does Jack know? What?
554
00:32:18,960 --> 00:32:19,959
Jack.
555
00:32:19,960 --> 00:32:22,960
He said he was
sorry for my loss.
556
00:32:26,960 --> 00:32:28,959
Jack drove me to St
Harry's in the morning.
557
00:32:28,960 --> 00:32:31,960
And then I went back to
his place and I fucked him.
558
00:32:34,960 --> 00:32:36,960
Now you know how it feels.
559
00:32:46,960 --> 00:32:49,640
ALARM RINGING
560
00:33:00,960 --> 00:33:04,959
Five-week-old came in 30 minutes
ago in respiratory distress.
561
00:33:04,960 --> 00:33:06,959
Resps are 81, oxygen is 90...
562
00:33:06,960 --> 00:33:09,640
VOICE FADES: intercostal
and subcostal recession.
563
00:33:12,160 --> 00:33:13,959
Baby's tiring.
564
00:33:13,960 --> 00:33:16,160
Put out a RESUS call.
But you're here.
565
00:33:19,960 --> 00:33:22,959
Erm, so your baby is going
to need some help breathing,
566
00:33:22,960 --> 00:33:24,959
she's not getting enough oxygen.
567
00:33:24,960 --> 00:33:27,160
VOICE FADES
568
00:33:32,480 --> 00:33:34,959
Don't worry, she's
in safe hands.
569
00:33:34,960 --> 00:33:36,960
Dr Afridi?
570
00:33:42,960 --> 00:33:45,960
ALARM BLARES
571
00:33:47,960 --> 00:33:48,960
Shit.
572
00:33:59,960 --> 00:34:01,959
I need you to look at this
baby, I don't know what's wrong.
573
00:34:01,960 --> 00:34:03,479
What do you mean?
I can't do it.
574
00:34:03,480 --> 00:34:05,960
Please, you have to come.
OK. I'll call you back.
575
00:34:10,960 --> 00:34:12,959
What's wrong with
this baby, Maryam?
576
00:34:12,960 --> 00:34:14,959
Five-week-old in
respiratory distress.
577
00:34:14,960 --> 00:34:17,959
RSV. Bronchiolitis.
She needs intubating.
578
00:34:17,960 --> 00:34:20,320
No, it's OK. We've got this.
579
00:34:22,960 --> 00:34:25,960
We just need to help
your baby to breathe, OK?
580
00:34:26,960 --> 00:34:29,960
PICU been called? Yes.
581
00:34:36,960 --> 00:34:38,960
Colour change on the capnograph.
582
00:34:40,960 --> 00:34:41,960
Anaesthetist is here.
583
00:34:43,960 --> 00:34:46,959
That's much better.
Simon, stay with her.
584
00:34:46,960 --> 00:34:49,959
Right, call me if oxygen
levels don't keep rising
585
00:34:49,960 --> 00:34:52,799
and when PICU get
here. Good job.
586
00:34:52,800 --> 00:34:54,640
You'd better come with me.
587
00:34:58,160 --> 00:35:00,959
I knew what that baby needed
and I knew how to do it.
588
00:35:00,960 --> 00:35:02,959
It was just like my body wouldn't
let me go through with it.
589
00:35:02,960 --> 00:35:05,960
And what do you think
your body's telling you?
590
00:35:07,960 --> 00:35:10,960
That if I treat another child
and it dies, I won't survive it.
591
00:35:13,320 --> 00:35:14,960
So how do you feel now?
592
00:35:15,960 --> 00:35:17,959
Stupid.
593
00:35:17,960 --> 00:35:18,960
Ashamed.
594
00:35:20,960 --> 00:35:21,960
Scared.
595
00:35:23,960 --> 00:35:25,959
I had a panic attack
in the toilets
596
00:35:25,960 --> 00:35:28,319
when I came back from the
labour ward last night.
597
00:35:28,320 --> 00:35:30,960
And is that the first one of those
you've had since you got back?
598
00:35:37,960 --> 00:35:41,959
When Sami arrived with
us... I stopped sleeping.
599
00:35:41,960 --> 00:35:44,959
When he slept, I had to
keep watching him breathing
600
00:35:44,960 --> 00:35:46,640
cos I was so scared
he was gonna die.
601
00:35:48,960 --> 00:35:54,960
And then I was pregnant again,
just waiting to miscarry again.
602
00:35:56,960 --> 00:35:58,959
And then when Xavi was born,
603
00:35:58,960 --> 00:36:00,479
it took them a minute
to get him to breathe
604
00:36:00,480 --> 00:36:03,960
and I thought, "Oh, THIS
is how we lose him."
605
00:36:05,960 --> 00:36:09,000
And then the whole vigil
thing all over again with him.
606
00:36:11,960 --> 00:36:14,799
It's like I'm just
waiting for it.
607
00:36:14,800 --> 00:36:17,960
I'm seeing all the ways they
might die play out in here.
608
00:36:19,960 --> 00:36:21,960
And how do you feel
about the future?
609
00:36:24,960 --> 00:36:25,960
Just this dread.
610
00:36:29,160 --> 00:36:30,959
This isn't you, Maryam.
611
00:36:30,960 --> 00:36:33,800
You're not well. Please
don't sign me off.
612
00:36:34,960 --> 00:36:36,960
Not until the
investigation concludes.
613
00:36:38,960 --> 00:36:41,959
Let me go in there a doctor.
614
00:36:41,960 --> 00:36:43,960
Please, Susan.
615
00:36:52,960 --> 00:36:55,800
PHONE RINGS
616
00:37:02,960 --> 00:37:05,960
Hi. JACK: 'Hi. I've
just had an offer.'
617
00:37:09,960 --> 00:37:11,959
Congratulations, Jack.
618
00:37:11,960 --> 00:37:14,959
'I didn't wanna spend the day
at work pretending to you.'
619
00:37:14,960 --> 00:37:18,959
I'm delighted for you,
really. 'I'll see you there.'
620
00:37:18,960 --> 00:37:20,960
Yeah. OK. Bye.
621
00:37:26,960 --> 00:37:28,160
Bastards.
622
00:37:30,960 --> 00:37:32,480
Yeah.
623
00:37:37,960 --> 00:37:39,960
What am I gonna do now, Mum?
624
00:37:56,960 --> 00:37:58,960
Jesus!
625
00:38:01,320 --> 00:38:04,960
I'm... I'm just taking the kids
to school and, er, nursery.
626
00:38:05,960 --> 00:38:06,960
Guy?
627
00:38:08,960 --> 00:38:10,479
Daddy? Yeah, he's fine, honey.
628
00:38:10,480 --> 00:38:12,959
We're gonna go to
school now, darling.
629
00:38:12,960 --> 00:38:13,959
We're gonna go to school, OK?
630
00:38:13,960 --> 00:38:15,999
Daddy's just a bit tired,
everything's all right.
631
00:38:16,000 --> 00:38:18,959
Mummy, we haven't had breakfast.
Yeah, I know. We can go to a cafe!
632
00:38:18,960 --> 00:38:19,999
Shall we do that?
633
00:38:20,000 --> 00:38:22,639
That'd be an adventure,
won't it? Come on, you two.
634
00:38:22,640 --> 00:38:24,999
Out you come. Yay
for adventures...
635
00:38:25,000 --> 00:38:28,960
Come on. Good boy. Out you go.
636
00:38:49,640 --> 00:38:51,999
It's just my childcare is
like three-dimensional chess
637
00:38:52,000 --> 00:38:55,959
so a rota sneak preview
would be much appreciated.
638
00:38:55,960 --> 00:38:58,800
I'm kind of your line
manager. Good luck with that.
639
00:39:00,000 --> 00:39:01,960
Thanks.
640
00:39:05,960 --> 00:39:07,959
Have you spoken to
Helen, by the way?
641
00:39:07,960 --> 00:39:10,959
Cavendish? No. Should I have?
Maybe just check in with her.
642
00:39:10,960 --> 00:39:13,000
Off to get my terms and
conditions in writing.
643
00:39:18,960 --> 00:39:21,320
Thank you. Thank YOU.
644
00:39:28,640 --> 00:39:31,640
PHONE RINGS, VIBRATES
645
00:39:34,640 --> 00:39:36,639
Dr Maryam Afridi?
646
00:39:36,640 --> 00:39:39,799
'This is Clare from the adoption
team at social services.
647
00:39:39,800 --> 00:39:41,959
'We have an update
on Sami's sister.
648
00:39:41,960 --> 00:39:44,959
'She was born very prematurely
the night before last.
649
00:39:44,960 --> 00:39:47,959
'She's currently in the
Neonatal Intensive Care Unit
650
00:39:47,960 --> 00:39:48,959
'at City General.'
651
00:39:48,960 --> 00:39:50,960
Don't take her away!
652
00:39:51,960 --> 00:39:56,799
'So we're gonna need to know
what it is you want to do.
653
00:39:56,800 --> 00:39:57,960
'Dr Afridi?
654
00:39:59,960 --> 00:40:01,960
'Dr Afridi, are you there?'
655
00:40:16,960 --> 00:40:20,960
I'm, erm, sorry
about last night.
656
00:40:22,960 --> 00:40:27,640
I didn't mean to tell you
about Debbie or Jack like that.
657
00:40:34,960 --> 00:40:36,040
What did Marco say exactly?
658
00:40:38,960 --> 00:40:43,160
Are you suspended... or
taking some time or...?
659
00:40:49,480 --> 00:40:52,000
I think you need to talk to someone
about how you got here, Guy.
660
00:40:53,960 --> 00:40:55,960
They're offering to help you.
661
00:40:56,960 --> 00:40:58,960
Just take the help.
662
00:41:00,960 --> 00:41:02,960
Please.
663
00:41:10,320 --> 00:41:11,960
I'm done.
664
00:41:34,960 --> 00:41:37,959
Er... Clare just called again.
665
00:41:37,960 --> 00:41:39,960
Just... let me
get through today.
666
00:41:45,960 --> 00:41:47,639
Are you sure you don't
want me to come with you?
667
00:41:47,640 --> 00:41:48,960
I'll be fine.
668
00:42:06,960 --> 00:42:08,960
Come on. Quick as you can!
669
00:42:10,960 --> 00:42:13,960
Hey, just, just be quiet, guys.
Daddy must still be sleeping.
670
00:42:14,960 --> 00:42:18,959
Shh, shh, shh. You two,
just be quiet. Good boy.
671
00:42:18,960 --> 00:42:20,640
Come on. Out we go.
672
00:42:25,960 --> 00:42:29,960
Grab your bag, we're late!
Come on. Quick! Quick! Quick!
673
00:42:30,960 --> 00:42:33,959
Mummy, it's swimming today!
Well, you can't... Well...
674
00:42:33,960 --> 00:42:36,959
I'm sorry, darling, we
haven't got your swimming kit.
675
00:42:36,960 --> 00:42:38,959
Please, Mummy, please
go home and get it!
676
00:42:38,960 --> 00:42:41,959
I can't spend the whole day
just chasing after you, Maggie!
677
00:42:41,960 --> 00:42:44,959
Mummy, I can't go if I don't
have it! Please, Mummy!
678
00:42:44,960 --> 00:42:46,959
OK, Maggie. Stop!
Do not shout at me!
679
00:42:46,960 --> 00:42:48,319
I will drop it off at reception.
680
00:42:48,320 --> 00:42:49,959
Now in you go.
Thank you, Mummy.
681
00:42:49,960 --> 00:42:53,160
Love you. Love you, too.
682
00:42:54,960 --> 00:42:56,000
♪ For me and for you
683
00:42:57,960 --> 00:43:01,959
♪ They used to envy you and
us I hate what we've become
684
00:43:01,960 --> 00:43:05,799
♪ Running round in circles
Till no air is in my lungs... ♪
685
00:43:05,800 --> 00:43:06,959
PHONE RINGS
686
00:43:06,960 --> 00:43:09,959
'This is Dr Guy Cavendish,
please leave a message.'
687
00:43:09,960 --> 00:43:12,319
♪ All this time
I'm fighting... ♪
688
00:43:12,320 --> 00:43:13,959
PHONE RINGS
689
00:43:13,960 --> 00:43:16,959
♪ Lately, I've been tied up
Lately, I've been lying... ♪
690
00:43:16,960 --> 00:43:20,959
PHONE RINGS
691
00:43:20,960 --> 00:43:23,959
♪ Lately, I've been useless
Lately, I've been loose
692
00:43:23,960 --> 00:43:26,959
♪ Lately, I'm pushing through
693
00:43:26,960 --> 00:43:29,959
♪ I'll hold my hand tonight
694
00:43:29,960 --> 00:43:33,960
♪ If I have to... ♪
695
00:43:39,320 --> 00:43:40,959
Guy?
696
00:43:40,960 --> 00:43:42,999
♪ Lately, I've been tied up... ♪
697
00:43:43,000 --> 00:43:45,959
Guy?
698
00:43:45,960 --> 00:43:47,959
♪ Lately, I've been thinking About
the ways to shake my life... ♪
699
00:43:47,960 --> 00:43:50,959
No... No, no... Guy? Guy?
700
00:43:50,960 --> 00:43:51,959
Guy, can you hear me?
701
00:43:51,960 --> 00:43:54,959
♪ Lately, I'm
pushing through... ♪
702
00:43:54,960 --> 00:43:56,959
Fuck, fuck, fuck!
703
00:43:56,960 --> 00:43:57,959
♪ I'll hold my hand tonight... ♪
704
00:43:57,960 --> 00:44:02,959
Fuck! PHONE RINGING
705
00:44:02,960 --> 00:44:05,959
♪ I'll only pay the price
706
00:44:05,960 --> 00:44:08,959
♪ When I'm with you... ♪
707
00:44:08,960 --> 00:44:10,959
Please, please, please...
708
00:44:10,960 --> 00:44:14,960
PHONE CONTINUES TO RING
709
00:44:17,160 --> 00:44:21,959
♪ Oh-oh-oh, lately... ♪
710
00:44:21,960 --> 00:44:23,960
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