Original subtitles

Add infinity to infinity,

and I can scatter the six of you across time,

space and reality!

You'll be out of my universe forever!

(cries out)

Guys, if you can hear me, remember:

Squaddies don't give up, we Hero up!

(cackles)

Aww, ding dong.

This better not be another Oz parody.

(grunts)

(gasps)

You're traveling through another dimension.

Or any kind of parody.

Your next dimension,

a Matinee Monster Mish-Mash!

(cries out)

(grunts)

I really stuck the landing.

(wolf howls)

Eerie.

Where is everyone?

(man 1) We're hiding!

(man 2) You should hide too.

Why are you hiding?

And why does this place look like some kind

of other-dimensional studio tour?

(woman screams)

(grunts)

-(moans) -(screams)

(groans)

Oh, wait just one hotep. Mummies?

-(screams) -(Iron Man) Don't panic!

Iron Man is...

(strains)

Here.

(grunts)

Ow.

The dimensional transfer must've drained my power reserves.

And they're about to rip this big can of hero open.

(groans)

(moans)

(gasps)

Somebody else help us!

With this Infinity Gauntlet,

I, Thanos, will rule the universe!

All right, Squaddies! Time to Hero up!

♪ When the bad guys are out All you have to do is shout now ♪

♪ Who's gonna Hero Up? ♪

♪ Well, they may not get along ♪

♪ But they're always fighting strong now ♪

♪ Who's gonna Hero Up? ♪

♪ Who'll save the day? The Super Hero Squad! ♪

♪ They'll Hero Up again! ♪

♪ Super Hero Squad! Hero Up ♪

♪ Super Hero Squad! Hero Up ♪

♪ Wolverine and Hulk are fierce Thanos ends up in tears ♪

♪ When Iron Man joins the fight ♪

♪ Falcon darts in from the sky Scarlet Witch by his side ♪

♪ Thor's hammer has thunder's might ♪

♪ Who'll save the day? The Super Hero Squad! ♪

♪ They'll Hero Up again! ♪

♪ Super Hero Squad! Hero Up ♪

♪ Super Hero Squad! Hero Up ♪

♪ Super Hero Squad! Hero Up ♪

♪ Super Hero Squad! ♪

(groans)

(growls)

(screams)

Ow. Wish my ear pods had a mute button.

(mummies moan)

(grunts)

Ugh. These photovoltaics are sensitive.

They'll recharge my armor,

even on a foggy night.

Eventually.

Get back!

I mean it, get back!

Stop. Get away!

(laughs)

(groans)

(electricity crackles)

Great. They're still charging, and so's my armor.

(moans)

(shrieks)

Behind you!

(grunts)

(strains)

(grunts)

Jack, quickly, while we still have a chance.

I'm not as helpless as I seem, Ellen.

Quick, hide!

(cries out)

(screams)

(splash)

(strains)

(grunts)

(strains)

Dust! I thought the Hulk had bad hygiene.

(strains)

(grunts)

Oh, come on armor, charge!

(strains)

Jack?

(growls)

You're a werewolf!

(roars)

(grunts)

(gasps)

(Iron Man) Hmm?

Aah.

(grunts)

Sic 'em, Jack!

(gasps)

(grunts)

(cries out)

(water splashes)

(sighs)

(growls)

(Jack) Ellen!

(strains)

(grunts)

(groans)

(roars)

Huh?

Ha-ha!

Hey, buddy, you okay?

This is a heck of a time for a fashion statement.

Wait a minute. (strains)

Listen, N'Kantu the mummy carried Ellen away.

You sure? I hear you people are very big on hiding.

Come on, we have to find her!

Well, they couldn't have gotten far.

Let me just power up and...

Hey, uh, where do you plug in your Christmas lights?

Oh, this is more of a Halloween only type place?

(Jack) Wait a minute.

What kind of monster are you anyway?

I'm not a monster.

Call me Iron Man. Hero.

Jack Russell, villager. What's a hero?

Monsters on the prowl and you don't have any heroes?

No wonder you guys scream so much.

In this land, a hero ain't nothing but a "sammich".

(Jack) There are only good monsters...

bad monsters...

...and villagers like me.

Any idea where that mummy's taking your friend?

To Dracula.

Those bad monsters I mentioned?

He's the worst.

In the night, he glides into town like a shadow

and bites villagers on the neck.

And then he drains them of their...

Blood?

Oh, we're not related.

No, does Dracula drain them of their blood?

Ew! That's disgusting.

He drains them of their energy.

(groans)

Anyway. In his laboratory,

he combines life energy with the energy generated

by his windmill to make monsters.

Like those soulless living mummies.

He hoards all the power for himself?

Sounds like a certain Dark Surfer I know back home.

It's terrible.

None in the village can vacuum, or even make toast.

That fiend.

(woman screams)

Ellen!

Come on. I'll show you what a hero does.

(sputters)

(groans)

(moans)

(gasps)

No! A living mummy carrying me

through the stench-filled swill of a long forgotten swamp!

(whimpering)

(spits)

(woman screams)

I was waiting for that.

This'll be a lot easier once I recharge.

(bubbling)

(strains)

Great. Now I'm stuck.

Yeah. And you're sinking.

Yeah. Give me a hand.

Okay, here we go.

(strains)

Careful, Jack! Lift with your legs.

Haven't you figured it out yet? I'm...

(monster groans)

What was that? Swamp gas?

(grunts)

(Iron Man) Ew.

Okay.

(wolf howls)

(Iron Man) Stay behind me, Jack.

This guy looks like he means business!

(gasps)

(announcer) Whatever knows fear burns at the Man-Thing's touch!

Ouch.

Who said that? Ow!

(groans)

Ah!

Hey, calm down.

What are you? Do you know Jack?

I thought I knew Jack.

Aww, man, not aga...

(strains)

Huh?

Partly cloudy. It's going to be a long night.

Partly cloudy with a big chance of weird.

So, you're one of the good monsters, huh?

What about fungus face here?

Aw. the Man-Thing's cool...

a gentle swamp creature, unless he's provoked...

but he can't help burning you if you're scared.

For your information, I wasn't scared. I was on fire.

(slurps)

Good boy, good boy.

(squelching, farts sounds)

(chuckles) That means he likes you.

-(farts) -(gasps)

Ah, the smell of love.

Hey, I don't hear the Shrieky McScream.

-I hope we haven't lost her. -I'm afraid not.

(unseen announcer) Whatever knows fear,

burns at the Man-Thing's touch!

Ahh!

(gurgles)

I know. You didn't mean it.

Ah!

That's where the mummy took Ellen.

(Jack) Windmill Dracula!

(wolf howls)

Bet those other Squaddies are in a universe

of cute cheerleaders or something.

And I'm stuck with these two,

burning my last reserves of power to slog through this...

Thanks, Man-Thing.

Just make sure you put me down before Dracula sees me like this,

or Ellen sees me like this,

or anyone sees me like this.

I don't even want me to see me like this!

Too weak to walk anymore.

Guys we need a really great plan.

Tell me more about Dracula.

Well, he loves to macrame.

I mean does he have any weaknesses?

Yeah, anything by Petula Clark.

(gurgles)

(chuckles)

(mummies moan)

(Man-Thing gurgles)

(mummies moan)

(gulps)

(growls)

(groans)

(grunts)

(sighs)

Man-Thing should keep those mummies busy

for as long as we need.

Yeah. He is pretty strong.

(Jack) Yes, and disgustingly moist. Mummies hate that.

(grunts)

Uh-huh. This looks about right.

Jack, put me on the table.

(grunts)

-Ow. -Sorry.

(Iron Man) Now, attach those two electrodes

to the middle of my chest.

I sure hope you know what you're doing.

Me too.

Because right now I'm more of a shiny hood ornament than a hero.

(beeps)

-(beeps) -(growls)

Aww, man, you call this tech?

There's no power unless the wind is moving.

Improvise.

Right. Give me an emotion.

Frustration! That's not what I meant.

Oh, sorry.

(mummies moan)

(snarls)

(strains)

(stone scrapes)

It's Dracula!

(gasps)

(squeaking)

I warned you not to meddle in my affairs, Jack Russell,

yet here you are, outside my windmill,

in front of the mummies and everybody.

What are you up to?

I came to borrow a cup of sugar.

A cup of sugar?

(mutters)

What are the cables for?

Oh, you'll see.

As you know,

we Jack Russells are great jumpers!

Mmm. You usually only see that agility

in a Springer Spaniel. Blah!

Son of Frankenstein!

(squeaks)

(grunts)

-Blah! -(grunts)

(Dracula) Blah.

-Blah. Blah. Blah. Blah. -(blows landing)

-Blah. Blah. -(blows continue)

(grunts)

Blah!

(straining)

(electricity crackles)

(grunts)

(electricity surges)

(electricity pulses)

(thunder rumbling)

(snarls)

(grunts)

(grunts)

Whatever you hope to accomplish will come to nothing.

We'll see about that.

(growls)

(strains)

(Jack) An eclipse?

I thought that wasn't until Thursday night?

This is Thursday, you buffoon!

(grunts)

Now, I shall drain you!

No!

(whimpering) Brain freeze!

What have you done?

It's a clever surprise my hero friend thought up.

What's a hero?

(strains)

(both screaming)

(bodies crash)

(groans)

Whoo!

That's a hero.

A hero at full power.

(grunts)

(groans)

Now, to give these mummies something to curse about!

(grunts)

Get it? Mummy's Curse? (laughs)

(gurgles)

(strains)

Ahh, the eclipse is over.

Dracula, Jack told me that you bite people to drain their energy.

So, we set a trap using a spare mini-tank

from one of my boot jets.

Liquid nitrogen, baby!

Cold.

Think of Transylvania in winter times 10,000.

(whimpering) Baah!

Now, I have to see the dentist.

I'm scared of the dentist!

Ah, no fear, because...

(unseen announcer) Whatever knows fear,

burns at the Man-Thing's touch!

Ouch.

Oh, Drat-cula!

(whimpering)

(Dracula) Blah!

(Jack) Well, scratch one monster.

Yeah, like you scratched my armor.

Anybody care if I sort through the wreckage?

Maybe enough equipment survived to help me get back home.

(clattering)

-(objects clatter) -(groans)

Be my guest.

(groans)

(squeaking)

(farts)

(gurgles)

Yes, he did scream like a girl.

(chuckles)

Speaking of which.

Ellen?

No scream? No fear?

And when did you have time to shop for a cape?

Silly boy, you automatically get a cape once you become a vampire.

Oh, no.

Did Dracula do this to you?

Yes. With the machinery in his lab, shortly before you arrived.

This is all my fault.

I don't mind. I think I'm a good monster.

Boy, I'll say. Ellen, you look...

I mean it's, uh... Wow!

(squelching, farting)

Iron Man, I now understand what a hero is.

Your actions, and what you told me off-camera

about your fellow Squaddies back home,

you've given me an idea.

We can become the first heroes of this world

and protect the villagers from the bad monsters.

I so dig that. What do you guys think?

Hmm. I like it.

Let someone else scream for help for a change.

Man-Thing?

(squelching, farting)

I think the Man-Thing speaks for all of us.

Well, then...

let the bad monsters of this world

tremble at the might of the Supernatural Hero Squad!

(Jack) Say you'll join us.

You can handle it Jack.

I've gotta figure out how to get back to Earth,

'cause where I come from, the universe is in big trouble.

(Captain America) Doc Samson, I'm only seeing you

because Nick Fury thinks it would do me some good.

Of course. Tell me more about that.

Uh, Nick Fury thinks it would do me some good.

Yes, yes, I see this in a number of the heroes I treat.

You're worried about the missing Super Hero Squad.

Life has become uncertain.

You know this Dark Surfer can wish everything out of existence.

You! Me! The sun!

The receptionist in the angora sweater who gives me a look!

It could be over any second!

-Just like that! -Ho!

We're doomed!

I'm afraid our time is up.

All right, hippie, why don't you lie down here,

and I'll sit there,

and you tell Captain America all about it.

(cries out)

-(crashing) -(objects clattering)

(clicks tongue) Civilians.

(theme music playing)