Original subtitles

Hello again!

I'm your Marveldom Storyteller,

bringing you today's tale of the most senses-shattering, mind-bending

blow-out of all time!

Let's begin. (clears throat)

Once upon a previous episode, Galactus was destroying the Earth.

What the heck?

(thunder rumbling)

(Iron Man laughs)

Wait a minute! That's the devourer of worlds? (laughs)

(Stardust) Iron Man, do not tease him.

Listen well to Stardust, my Squaddie friend!

Galactus is all-powerful, with as much cosmic energy as a million planets.

Uh-huh, watch this.

Hey Tiny, nice hat!

But how many channels you get with that thing? (laughs)

Oh!

-Yo, Thanos! -(growls)

(grunts)

-Oh! -Nah!

Yeah, but on a big man like you, a helmet looks fantastic.

Ah, save it, Shellhead. He ain't even looking at you.

Like we was, I don't know, nothing or something.

(loud noise)

(coughs, grunts)

These appetizers are terrible. Lifeless.

My heralds, why has Earth not been properly prepared for my coming?

The fault is mine.

Once you were first among my heralds, Norrin Radd.

I have not forgiven you for leaving me.

Delay the dinner of Galactus no longer.

But why eat Earth? It's incredible.

It's warm and cold and wet and dry,

and green and brown and blue and full of the most wonderful humans.

You know, we could search the galaxy for another planet.

-An uninhabited one. -(crashing sound)

There's a perfectly good planet right here.

Do you expect the devourer of worlds to skip a meal?

Where did you go?

Oh! These humans are insignificant. Nothing but ants at my picnic.

Hey, if I was an ant at a picnic, could I do this?

(hums)

Still woozy, I see.

Earth is off the menu.

-I tire of your backtalk. -(grunts)

Whoa, don't tell me we just won.

Not at all. I sense he has teleported the heralds billions of light years away.

And where's wee man himself gone?

(gasps)

(gasping)

(Doctor Doom) With that Infinity Sword,

I will rule The Universe!

All right, Squaddies, time to hero up!

♪ When the bad guys are out ♪

♪ All you have to do Is shout now ♪

♪ Who's gonna hero up? ♪

♪ Well, they may not get along ♪

♪ But they're always Fighting strong now ♪

♪ Who's gonna hero up? ♪

♪ Who'll save the day? The Super Hero Squad ♪

♪ They'll Hero Up again ♪

-♪ Super Hero Squad! ♪ -♪ Hero up ♪

-♪ Super Hero Squad! -♪ Hero up ♪

♪ Wolverine and Hulk are fierce Dr. Doom ends up in tears ♪

♪ When Iron Man Joins the fight ♪

♪ Falcon darts in from the sky Silver Surfer by his side ♪

♪ Thor's hammer Has thunder's might ♪

♪ Who'll save the day? The Super Hero Squad ♪

♪ They'll hero up again ♪

-♪ Super Hero Squad! ♪ -♪ Hero Up ♪

-♪ Super Hero Squad! ♪ -♪ Hero Up ♪

♪ Super Hero Squad ♪

I hate those Squaddies!

Oh!

The description checks out. That has to be our man.

Keep him busy, Cap. We're working up a secret weapon.

Awesome. What secret weapon?

I'm thinking.

Roger that. Go with plan B, Heroes.

Cool tunic. But Galactus be not the first giant Thor hath felled.

(grunts)

Oh, Mommy!

(gasps)

Oh!

(Captain America) We're not making a dent in that world-eating bruiser.

Hup, hup, hup!

What's he making up there?

A Destructo pump.

(chuckles) Galactus prefers to drain life energy

from a planet's creamy magma filling first,

and save the crunchy outer shell for last.

Hey, you're the Watcher, right? Another cosmic-entity guy?

Why don't you do something?

I did. I made popcorn. (guffaws)

(scoffs)

(Doom hums, smirks)

Finally, a break.

All I need to do is to fly off somewhere

and wait for Galactus to turn the Earth into a half-eaten ball of soot.

Then I can sift the fractals out of the soot,

without any of those heroes getting in my way,

or anybody.

(Doom cackles and wheezes)

My cosmic food processor is complete. Let the meal begin.

Oh!

(superheroes grunting)

Purple man strong.

-But? (grunts) -But Hulk...

Uh, Hulk don't know what. Purple man just really strong.

Really, Hulk? For a guy with such a limited vocabulary,

letting one of your two catch-phrases slip by just seemed wrong.

Hulk don't understand.

(superheroes grunting)

Ho!

(grunts)

Meddlesome insects.

Yes!

(Captain America) Keep at it, Squaddies. Maybe we can't hurt this lug,

but we can sure as shooting wreck his appliances.

Hup, hup and hup, soldier.

-(Iron Man) So we're agreed? -(Mr. Fantastic) No question.

The Infinity Sword is the only object powerful enough to save us.

-The Infinity Sword is... -Exactly, Surfer.

There's a good possibility that between us and Doom,

all the fractals have been found already.

-Yes, I know, but... -I'll tell the others.

Hulk, I need some heavy hitters.

(sighs)

Sheesh, and you're the smart one?

Now's the time you pick to raid the bad guys?

As in now, when we have no choice? Yeah.

We have a plan to save the world, but we need Doom's fractals.

-(all) Yeah, of course. -(toilet flushes)

(mutters, growls)

(all growl)

It's like that, is it?

Just because I was abandoning you chumps.

(chuckles) Squirt, squirt, squirt.

-(laughs) -Stop it!

(Doom hyperventilates)

No! No! You can't do this to me.

Nobody puts baby in the corner!

M-mark my words!

I will have my revenge and... Pardon me!

(grunts)

(grunts)

Uh!

Oh!

(grunts)

Ostendo sum nobis autrum dimension.

Salutations and greetings.

(grunts) Proprinquious, prodigium ut autrum dimension.

(gasps)

(Galactus laughs)

Uh! As if.

(growls)

(Galactus) You only delay the end.

(stomach growls)

I'll show you who's the cosmic entity.

(loud noise)

(loud noise)

He's fumigating us.

(coughing)

Still missing one little fractal.

No chance of finding it. We've been scouring the city for weeks.

It's a puzzle, all right. Fractals can't be detected by any kind of scan.

(Wolverine grunts)

I got news.

We're about five minutes from extinction, and the clock's ticking.

That's it. Time.

Time resonance, of course.

We can't know where the fractal is in three dimensions,

but the fourth dimension, time, will tell us where it's been.

Let's see. Get me three Tesseract pullers,

a wireless lock-washer, and three opticon scolometers, stat.

Sweet.

Uh, Hulk don't understand.

Huh, there's a first.

(siren wailing)

(beeping)

Nay.

It's taking us there.

(chuckles)

(grunting)

Oh, no! Hey, this is Reptil's house.

Keep digging, Wolvie. Here it comes, here it comes.

Nothing.

Huh, Galactus just gassed us.

The Helicarrier Infirmary is full.

So where's that secret weapon, and why are you messing up my lawn?

Reptil, does this spot mean anything to you?

No. The neighbor's dog likes to go there.

(digging)

Phew! Powerful smell, in a couple of ways. Bad dog.

Oh, and that's where I found the Sunstone.

-(beeping) -(gasps)

I see. The energy released by the shattering Infinity Sword

sent a fractal back through time, hundreds of millions of years.

Wait, Reptil's powers come from a fossil fractal?

More like a fractal fossil.

Ah, so that's why I'm fractal-proof. I already have one.

Right. You're fractal-proof?

Uh, I knew there was something I wanted to tell you, Tony.

Big help. I hate to do this to you, Reptil, but you know what comes next.

So much for my superhero career.

Now I'm just some guy who doesn't wear shoes.

You're still a hero, kid. You just proved it.

It's up to us.

(growls)

Pathetic humans.

You are nothing next to Galactus, pitiful, puny insects.

(grunts)

What? Give me that.

You are insignificant. (pants)

Stop it. (stomach growls)

(grunts)

(growls)

Now don't tell me the bad guys are teaming up with the good guys.

-(all) Right. -How pathetic, ain't it?

(all) Right-o

(Abomination laughs) Nice ears.

I am so hungry.

(growls)

(grunts)

Avert your eyes.

There are some sights man and woman were not meant to see.

(gasps) Too late.

(heavy footsteps) Ah-ha!

(coughing)

(grunts)

Ms. Marvel, Kirby's crackle of frustration just destroyed all of Villainville.

Sister, you said a mouthful.

(banging)

(chuckles) Squirt, squirt, squirt.

(grunts)

No!

Nah!

The whole blamed planet's busting up.

(Iron Man) Calm down, it's not the end of the world.

-(loud noise) -Oh, shoot, it is.

Heroes of Earth, Hero Up!

♪ When the bad guys are out ♪

♪ All you have to do Is shout now ♪

♪ Who's gonna hero up? ♪

♪ Well, they may not get along ♪

♪ But they're always fighting strong now ♪

♪ Who's gonna hero up? ♪

♪ Who'll save the day? The Super Hero Squad ♪

♪ They'll hero up again ♪

-♪ Super Hero Squad! ♪ -♪ Hero Up ♪

♪ Super Hero Squad ♪

Hey, watch it.

It's clobbering time.

Ah-ha!

Lightning still hath no effect. Jiminy.

I hate to do it, but we've got to erase Galactus from existence.

Huh!

(grunts)

(laughs) Do these gnats never stop?

That's it?

(Doom) That's what you're doing wrong.

-(grunts) -(sniggers) At last.

The good part, where all of reality bends to my whim.

Oh! (grunts)

D'oh! No, this thing is just a garden-variety disintegrator.

How do I work this?

The Infinity Sword can only be operated

by the being who wears the Infinity Gauntlet.

There's a gauntlet, too?

Gung-ho! (grunts)

Aw, man!

Reptil's fractal-proof. There's another Infinity whatchahoozie.

Why don't people tell me these things?

Welcome to management.

A source of cosmic power, unlike anything I have seen.

(gasps)

Delish.

Oh!

(stomach growling)

Incoming.

(screaming)

(loud noise)

(Doom) Nuts!

(laughs)

Infinity reflux. It happens when I eat between planets.

A few burnt continents will clear that up.

Mr. Fantastic? Any brilliant last-minute save?

I was going to do that.

(Silver Surfer) Do not fear, my teammate.

You.

Whoa! Ow!

No planet has ever defied Galactus so.

'Tis all fun and games, till somebody loseth an eye.

Why do you anger Galactus?

Forgive me, great one. I have a proposition.

Spare this jewel of a planet, with its wonderful humans.

I know they can't evacuate to save their lives,

but they have so many other good qualities.

No.

What if I were to become Galactus' herald again?

Interesting. Let's discuss this after dinner.

Now, Galactus.

You're aggravating my heartburn.

Yes, there has never been a herald as clever or as bold as you.

-You would come back? -On one condition,

that I only find you worlds which have no intelligent life.

Uh, what intelligent life?

Sounds dangerous.

It would be like old times.

You and me, together, traveling the open space ways.

Without the needless carnage.

It is done... right after dinner.

-Now. -(groans)

Come, Storm.

-(loud noise) -Oh!

Here, it's probably safer with you.

Yes, when held by one who wears the Infinity Gauntlet.

Oh, skip it. After this, I'm through with Infinity anything.

Surfer, you sure about this?

We all answer the call of the cosmos.

You don't have another one of those little snacky swords, do you?

(man) Everybody smile.

Everybody say "cheese."

Villain, I've been hoping to haul your heinous heinie to the hoosegow.

(sniggers)

You heroes don't know the half of it.

We'll tell you all the real bad stuff.

-(yelps) -You bet you will.

You still here? I thought you were skipping out.

She digs me.

Oh, next time I take over the world, I work alone.

We'll never forget you, Surfer.

And I will never forget this place and its strange customs,

or my many friends, or the $10 that Wolverine owes me.

Oh, you're never going to see that.

Or Thor's powerful belches after a big meal.

(Thor) I heard that.

Come, herald.

Endless space beckons, and Galactus is starving.

Plus, I need to check the scores.

Hmm, I know of a nebula that nobody will miss.

Ooh, drive-through.

And so the Infinity Sword was rebuilt,

but Doom didn't get his hands on it.

The Silver Surfer returned to space,

but his heroic sacrifice saved us all.

End of story.

Until next time, I'm your Marveldom Storyteller.

(all cheering)

Tell me another story.

Ms. Marvel, that is the most vivid briefing you've ever given.

Your parents okay, kid?

Back home, safe and sound.

Huh! I'm going to miss all this.

I mean, I can never change by yelling "Brachiosaur Tail."

The fractal's energy must have...

Whoa, now I turn into whole dinosaurs?

It's a little different, but I'll take it.

Oh, Iron Man, can I say it please?

Yes, if you get off me.

Super Hero Squad... Hero up!

-♪ Super Hero Squad! ♪ -♪ Hero up ♪

♪ Super Hero Squad ♪