Original subtitles

♪

[Bed squeaking]

-[Grunts] -Mm. Kind of -- It's just --

-Is that -- Oh, it's okay. -Can we -- just like that?

-It's okay. -Is that good?

-Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. We can go slow.

-[Breathes deeply]

[Both chuckle]

-You close? -Um, I...

I think I lost it.

-That's okay.

-Yeah. Do you -- But do you want to --

-Stop? Yeah, no, we can stop.

-Oh, oh, great, yeah, yeah. I have to go to work.

-So, okay, alright. -Yeah, no, that's okay.

Good try.

[Sighs] -Do you wanna try again tonight?

-Maybe? I don't know.

I'm -- I'm supposed to meet with Doug later,

so I don't really know what kind of mood I'm gonna be in.

-Sorry, I always forget you have a parole officer.

-He's a probation officer. It's not a parole --

I didn't go to jail. That's the difference.

I keep explaining that, and you don't...

-Do you wanna try this weekend?

-Maybe!

[Shower running]

♪

[Exhales, grunts]

♪

[Grunts]

[Knock on door]

Hi. My name's Jack Brown.

I was curious if I could talk to you

about saving the planet today. -Uh, no, no.

♪

-Oh, hi. Oh. Did you want a fitting room?

Or should I wrap it up for you?

-Just ring it up, please. -Okay.

-Can you put me on the list? -Yeah, sure, of course.

-For, like, not to come back? -To not come back?

-I wanna -- I wanna be on the list that's, like,

never come here again for you and your peers.

-I'll take this, too.

-Oh, um, off the mannequin?

-Just -- I'll take it.

-Okay.

[Knock on door]

-Yo! -Hey, my name's Jack Brown.

-Yeah, you're from Titty Bingo.

-Excuse me?

-You know what? N-Never mind.

-Wait, no, what's -- what's Titty Bingo?

-That's from the Spring Resort collection.

♪

-Yes. -Okay.

♪

-Why?

♪

[Door closes]

-Oh, hey, welcome to the store --

-Just looking.

[Liquid pouring]

-[Laugh] -Caught you! [Laughs]

-Um... -Where's that from?

-Um, the -- Sorry?

-The wine. -Oh, uh...the bottle?

[Laughs] -You're fun.

You're fun. That's a fun answer.

Hm. Mmm!

Ugh. Who serves room-temperature rosé?

-Ugh, my boss. [Chuckles]

-That dress is good on you. -Uh, it -- it's not mine.

We, you know -- We have to wear stuff from the store, so...

I mean, I...I would love to show you something similar,

or you could even -- you could try this one on.

-Why'd you do that?

-Well, I work here, so...

-No, why'd you deflect when I gave you a compliment?

-Oh, I --

-Is that something you normally do?

-Um...

-You shouldn't do that.

No, we would never talk to anyone else

the way we talk to ourselves.

My friend Brené Brown says that.

-Oh -- -Come with me.

Oh, my God, you're so tall.

-I know.

-No, it's amazing. [Gasps]

You're like a Valkyrie or an Amazonian.

-What? -You look like Wonder Woman.

[Gasps] Look at you. You're so powerful.

You look amazing, right?

Say it.

You look amazing.

Say it. -No, it's -- No.

-You look amazing. -I...

-[Whispering] "I look amazing."

Now you.

-I look amazing. -Yeah, one more time.

-I look amazing. -Okay, one more time.

-I look amazing. -Now I believe you.

[Both laugh]

We're just having fun. [Laughs] I love that.

I'm Catherine. People call me Cat.

-I'm, uh, Lindsay. People just...

-Lindz? -...call me Lindsay.

-I'm gonna call you Lindz.

You're about to go on break, right?

-Oh, I don't --

-I feel like you're about to go on break.

-In the back of my mind, I just --

I've always wanted to be a designer,

and then I got -- I don't know.

Here I am working at a store, and Jack is --

I'm sorry. I'm a little embarrassed.

I'm just -- I'm rambling on and on.

-No. No, no. -I-I -- We should --

Let's just stop talking about me.

-Lindz, honestly, I'm just happy

to be talking to another person who's married.

-Oh, are your friends not married?

-Well, I don't really have a lot of friends.

-Oh, my God. I don't either.

-Well, who has time, you know? -Right?

-Work, kids. Blah.

-Oh, you have kids?

-Twins. You don't?

-Oh, no, no.

No twins, no kids.

Um, we -- you know, we talked about it,

and it's -- it's not like we're not -- not trying.

We're just not trying, you know? -Well, good for you.

We need more wine. What's her name?

-Um, Georgia?

-Georgia!

Hey, Georgia! -Oh, God.

-Yeah, you.

-Is there something I can help you with?

-My friend Lindz is entertaining me,

and we would just love another bottle

of that delicious rosé you're pouring.

-Oh, Lindz is it now?

Well, Lindz, if your friend isn't going to buy anything,

I'm going to have to ask her to leave.

-Is she talking to me? -Yes, I am.

-I'm sorry. -You're going to be.

-Oh, okay.

I -- Okay, I think she's mad.

Um, Lindz, you get commission, right?

-Yeah. -Yeah, great, okay.

Georgia? I'm gonna take care of this.

Have you ever thought about meditating?

-So, then Cat points to an entire rack and says,

"I'll take all of that in a size 2."

Points to another rack and says,

"I'll take all of that in a size 4,"

because she gains weight when they go to France.

And then she says, "I'll take all of the boots in a 7

and then whatever Lindz likes."

-Ooh, "Lindz." -Yeah, "whatever Lindz likes."

-You fucking hate when people call you Lindz.

-What? No, I -- Sorry, what was I saying?

You just threw me off track.

-Uh, boots and then whatever Lindz likes.

-Yes, whatever Lindz likes from the jewelry.

"You know what, actually,

I'm just gonna take all of the jewelry."

-Oh, fuck. -Yeah!

"And I want it hand-wrapped, individually, by you."

-She said that to Georgia?

-To Georgia.

-And you're not fired? -No!

I sold more in 10 minutes

than that boutique has sold in six months.

-Nice. -Then she takes my phone.

She puts her number in it and says, "You and Jack

haveto go to Sonoma next weekend with Matt and I."

-Sonoma.

-Yeah, Cat says it's the new Napa.

[TV turns on, baseball game playing]

Did you hear what I just said?

-What? Yeah, no, yeah, it's wild.

Do we not get the MLB Network anymore?

-Do you wanna go? -What?

-Do you wanna go?

-What, to Napa? -Sonoma.

-Well done by Eovaldi.

-Jack.

-Bottom of the third. Red Sox leading...

-I mean, you don't think that's kind of weird?

-Uh, no. Do not cross-examine.

-I'm not. I'm not. I just -- You don't know this Kate.

-Cat. -Right.

But this person just, like, blows into your store,

apparently buys everything in it,

and then you get a huge commission,

which, like, you know, awesome.

And then she just invites you to Sedona?

-Sonoma. -What did I say?

-Sedona.

-My point being, you know, this could be some weird

rich-person sex thing or, like, purge thing or --

-Purge? -Yeah, like the movies.

Like -- Like maybe they wanna hunt us for sport.

Did you think about that? -No, I didn't, Jack,

because I'm not an idiot.

-Nice, nice, that's good.

That's good. -[Sighs]

I'm sorry.

[Baseball game continues]

-[Sighs] [Remote thuds]

-I would really like to go.

-And I would like to understand why you want to spend a weekend

with people you don't know.

-Okay, because she was fun and funny and interesting,

and she and her husband own their own businesses.

And they have a house and they have a family.

They have their shit together.

I thought this could be really good for us.

-When is it?

-Next weekend. -Next weekend!

It's next weekend. You said that. Sorry.

Okay.

-Really? -Yeah.

Yeah, I mean, you know, I gotta get the time off

and then clear it with Doug.

-[Chuckles] -But, uh...

Yeah, it'll be fun.

-Yeah?

-I think.

-Yeah? -Yeah, yeah.

-Yeah? -Yeah, yeah.

-Okay. -Okay.

-I'm gonna text her. -Great.

-Okay.

-If they purge us, though, I get to be super pissed off.

-I mean, it could be the sex thing.

-No.

♪

I knew we should've printed the directions.

-Well, I mean, I didn't know that there would be no service.

-This is what rich people do.

They go off the grid for vacation.

-Because you know so many rich people?

-No, but I do watch "Billions,"

and this is -- this is a total Axe move.

-Okay.

-Where the fuck are we?

-We're in wine country. -So why are there cows?

There should be grapes. Read the invite again?

-"You are cordially invited to a weekend

of wine and whimsy at Vlas Vineyard,

71166 Leewise Road." [Cow moos]

Oh, my God.

And there's a star and picture of cow.

-So we are clearly close.

[Lucius's "Dusty Trails"plays]

♪

-♪ We've been gone for such a long time ♪

-That's a murder house. -What?

-Yeah. That's a house where murder happens.

-What are you talking about?

-My mom always said you would kill me,

and you've finally done it.

This is great. -Alright, Purge.

Look, they're obviously very, very wealthy.

Are you gonna hit the call button?

We're just gonna sit here like weirdos.

Hi! It's Jack and Lindsay!

-♪ I know I'm no doctor

♪ But if I was guessing

[Knock on door] ♪ I'd say it was

♪ Just growing pains

♪

♪ Painful as growing is

♪ We can't forget it's our ticket to taking the reins ♪

-No, Jack! -Hello?

-Don't be rude!

Hello?

-[Scoffs]

♪

-♪ We'll be okay

-[Whispering] This man is made of dicks.

-[Whispering] Jack! -What? He's --

-No, I need you to be cool, okay?

-I am cool. -No, listen to me.

I really like her, and she's been really nice

to invite us up here, and I'm not really great

at making friends, so I just need you to --

-I-I will keep it tight.

-Tightest.

-[Exhales sharply]

-♪ Penny for her thoughts

♪ Leave me broke

♪ 'Cause everyone's around and I'm still alone ♪

-Okay. -Yeah. Yeah.

-...two and... [Cork pops]

-Aah! -Oh. Oh, whoa.

Let's get the birthday weekend started!

Alright! Cheers.

-Hey! -Hi.

-You made it! -Hi!

-Hey, can we get Jack and Lindsay some drinks?

-Hi. -Daniel. Hi.

-Thank you. -Oh, thank you.

-He's got the champagne there. Great.

-I am so grateful you're here.

[Whispering] I have been losing my mind.

Jack, it is so nice to finally meet you.

You are so lucky to have her. She's so special.

-Oh, yeah, no, th-thank you. -Yeah, 'course.

Jack and Lindz, these are our friends Kerry and Carrie.

-We know. It's okay to laugh.

-I didn't know his name was Kerry when we met.

-Yeah, she was modeling at this World Wildlife fundraiser,

fashion show, interactive theater

sort of thing that Jared was doing.

-Leto, not Kushner. -Yeah, of course.

That Jared was doing at Dumbo.

-We were all playing the emotions of penguins

that were killed for their scales.

-Right, right, and the girls were only allowed

to show what emotion they were. -Sad.

-Which was super convincing, 'cause I thought her name was...

-Sad. -...Sad for like a week.

But, in my defense, I was pretty fuckin' banged up, so...

-[Laughs] He spent $65,000 on champagne.

-Yeah, and then we did a couple of grams

of Bolivian marching powder in the bathroom.

-And we tried to have sex.

-In the bathroom. -But he couldn't get hard.

-Because of the blow. -Because of the blow.

[Laughter]

And we've been together pretty much ever since.

-Ah! Classic Kerry, right, babe?

-Can I steal her for a sec?

-Oh, yeah, by all means. -Great.

I've heard that story a million times.

-[Chuckling]

-Welcome.

-My man.

-Yeah. -Matt Flax.

-Jack Brown. -Pleasure there, bud.

-Good to meet you. -Yeah, nice to meet you, too.

Thank you. -Thanks for coming out.

-Yeah, no, my -- my -- This is --

Hey, can I -- Do you mind?

-Oh, yeah, that's great. Thank you, Becca.

-Thank you, Becca.

-Hi. -Hi.

God, I hate those people.

-Really? They seem nice.

-Oh, they're not. They're such assholes.

-Really? -Yes.

So, how's Jack doing?

He thinks we're crazy, right?

-What? No.

I mean...he thinks you're gonna murder us.

[Both laugh]

I mean, he's -- he's joking.

-Oh, my God, I know. I totally get it.

I'm just, like, this crazy stranger

who stumbles into your store

and then invites you to Healdsburg.

[Chuckling] Who -- Who does that?

Actually, that would make a really good horror movie.

Should we write that?

I love that idea.

-I-I'm sorry. I thought we were in Sonoma.

-Oh, we are, but it's actually Healdsburg, technically Windsor,

but it's all in the Sonoma region.

-Oh, okay. You know what?

Um, Jack and I were talking on the way up,

and we were thinking that --

-I just felt an immediate connection to you.

You seem so...

-Sad? -[Laughs]

That's a good callback.

No, just...

undervalued.

You're not supposed to be selling other people's clothes.

-Well, I-I mean, I don't want to be.

-Then why are you?

-Student debt.

-Oh.

-You enjoying the brew?

-Oh, shit, you can't -- you can't get this in California.

-Pause. You buy the distributor, you can do whatever you want.

[Laughs] -You buy the --

You bought the distributor?

-Anyway, let me tell you a quick story

so that you don't have to hear it from Kerry later.

His grandfather invented Tater Tots.

-Get the fuck out of here. -No, it's an epic story.

He was working KP, kitchen duty, in World War II.

Not in the shit, he was in, like, Mississippi or something,

and there were all these little extra pieces of potato

that they weren't using, so the guys in the kitchen

started frying 'em up, and the grunts loved 'em.

So the war ends, and this guy has got the foresight

to trademark the thing.

The rest of the KP guys were pissed.

-He didn't cut 'em in?

-No, man, the guy was a fuckin' killer.

You know? -Yeah.

-[Whispering] Killer. Killer instinct.

Oh, wow. -Yeah.

-[Sniffing]

-Uh, so, how many more people are coming up this weekend?

-Oh, this is it.

Cat wanted to keep it pretty intimate for her birthday.

We're gonna blow it out for 30, so [Sniffs]

she wanted to keep it simple for 29.

-It's Cat's birthday? -What, 69?!

-[Laughing] My guy!

-It's -- It's her birthday?

-I feel like I might know the waiter.

-Mm, which one? -The guy.

-Daniel?

-Daniel. -Yeah.

-Huh. Uh...

-Do you know him? -Where are the twins?

-Oh, they're back with the au pair in the city.

We wanted to get away this weekend.

-Oh, hell yeah. Good for you.

-Yeah, it's my birthday.

I didn't want to think about it.

Them. They're obvious-- They're people. I love them.

-Did you just say it was your birthday?

-Yeah. -Your birthday?!

-Yeah. -Oh, my God!

I didn't bring anything! -Oh, that's okay.

-No, I'm so sorry.

-Trust me, you being here is enough.

-I really want you to let me cook you dinner.

-Oh, my -- Ew, no! -Clean or something?

-No? -Ew, no, no, no.

We have -- We have people who do that.

You just be our guest.

Just relax, enjoy.

-Okay. -Yeah.

I'm just happy you're here.

-Mmm.

-Hey.

-Hi. -Hi.

-Hi. -Hi.

-You know -- Hi.

I think Lindsay and I would love

to take a moment to just go check out our room real quick.

Just get situated.

-Oh.

Yeah, I'm -- I'm so sorry.

I-I forget that being up here makes people...

-Oh -- -Yes, no, no, no.

You two go unload.

Wink-wink. Sorry. I'm -- I'm so inappropriate.

Sometimes I have to -- Becca!

Could you please show our guests to their room?

-Hi. -Of course.

We took the liberty of putting your bags in your room.

-I'm just gonna assume it's that one there

at the end of the hallway, right?

So I think we can probably get there on our own.

Thank you.

-You're welcome.

-Holy shit, this is a guest room?

-He bought my favorite brewery.

-What? -He bought --

Well, he bought the distribution --

How did he know that's my favorite beer?

-Oh, I mean, I don't know.

He probably, like, Instagrammed you

or Facebooked you or whatever.

-So he stalked me?

-No, he Googled you. We all do it.

We all Google each other, and then we act surprised

when people tell us shit that we already know about ourselves.

-Did you know it was her birthday?

-Mm...

-That's kind of weird she wouldn't tell us

that we were up here for her birthday.

-Well, I think that --

-Where are our bags?

-Um...

They're in here, in a closet.

-Jesus. -They're unpacked.

-They are definitely gonna kill us.

Hey, what are these?

-I don't know.

Gift bags!

Oh, my God!

-Jesus. -Jack, these are so nice!

-I've got face wash.

-Hangover kit.

-Beard trim lotion.

-Massage oil.

-I have lube.

-Really? -Yes.

There's, like, a tremendous amount of sex stuff in here.

-Oh, my God.

-And I have Viagra.

-[Gasps]

I told you it was a sex thing.

-Yes, yes, you did. -[Laughs]

Gum.

-Hey.

-Hey.

-Can -- Can we not do any drugs this weekend?

-Who's doing drugs?

-I mean, the first thing that guy said --

-Which guy? -Kerry, the tall guy.

He said he does a lot of blow.

-Okay?

-And there are joints in my bag.

-Which are totally legal.

-They are, for people that aren't on probation

and have to piss in a cup every week.

-Well, I mean, well, that's not their fault.

-Okay.

There are six people here. -Okay.

-Mm-hmm, and there's an itinerary.

-Wine tasting, karaoke, brunch, yoga, massages!

Jack, this is like a resort.

-"Jumpin' Jack Flash."

-What?

That's so rad.

What does mine say?

-"Lazy Lindz."

-Oh, well...

-You still hate when people call you "Lindz," right?

-Oh, yeah. -But they --

-Don't know that. -Right.

-You wanna...unload?

-Now?

You don't really seem like you want to.

-Yeah, I don't.

[Both laugh]

♪

[Indistinct conversations]

-Fuck, I should've changed. -No, no, no, you look fine.

-I look fucking homeless. -Jack, you look fine.

-Jack, Lindz, you guys get situated?

-Yeah, yeah. Somebody unpacked our stuff.

-Oh, yeah, that was Milton.

He is the fucking best.

-Milton? -Well, I say Milton.

I mean Daniel and Becca. But yeah.

-Okay, you know, by the way, thank you for the bags.

They're incredible. -Oh, did we do bags?

Hey, babe, what's in the bags? -I don't know.

I told Milton to do the kits again

and then just to do something comfy but fun.

-Guys, seriously...

are they comfy but fun?

-Very.

-Great. -Great.

-So I'm -- I'm still not getting any cellphone reception.

-Yeah, and you won't. -What?

-No Internet, either.

-Only way I can keep him off the grid.

-She calls it a digital detox.

-We just get to be here together without any interruptions.

-Wow, that's -- that's crazy.

-S-So, what are we doing for dinner?

-I'm -- I'm -- I'm -- I'm happy to help in the kitchen

with the vegan -- -Oh, no, no, no.

-Come here, I wanna show you something.

Ker, come here. -You boys go away.

I want Lindz to myself. -Okay.

-Come here. -Hey, have fun.

-[Sighs] -Jack?

-Yeah. -What are you drinking?

-Uh, just whatever you got there is perfect.

Thank you. -Tequila.

-Oh.

-Bing.

Bang.

Bong. -Boom.

Cheers. -Cheers, yeah. Thanks, guys.

Fuck me, that's good. -Right? Yeah?

-What -- Is this -- Is this Casa? What is this?

-It's from me and Matt's place in Jalisco.

-Jalisco?

-Yeah, the tequila capital of the world, Jack.

-Is this your tequila?

-Well, mine and Ker's, but yeah.

-Oh, my God, that is cool.

-Yeah, we don't sell it, though.

-Yeah, it's just for personal consumption.

-Mm-hmm. Do you love it? Or do you love it?

-You love it. -Kerry?

-Yes? -I fucking love this tequila.

-I knew it.

We'll -- We'll send you a case, huh?

-Thank you, man. That's really --

That's really sweet. Thank you.

That's really nice of you guys. -Of course.

-Hey, come on. I wanna show you the view.

-Yeah, yeah, yeah.

-Hey, actually, you gotta finish your drink.

No man refills till every man is refueled.

It's a house rule.

-I told my wife I wasn't gonna drink too much,

so I'm probably just gonna, like --

I'll just sip it a little bit,

maybe, like, a water in there, maybe a juice --

-How are we gonna drink too much?

We're not going anywhere. [Laughs]

-I-I -- -Bottoms up!

-Okay, okay.

-[Chanting indistinctly]

Let's go! -It's really nice, though.

It's kind of oaky.

-Becca had our chef prep everything

and then run it up here this morning.

[Whispering] Don't tell anyone. -No.

-Wine? -Yes, please.

-Okay.

Here you go. -Thank you.

-You're welcome.

-These are beautiful glasses.

-Oh, thank you.

Yeah, they're kind of one of a kind.

Um...whoo.

Okay, and...

here you go.

Oh, sorry, it's just about out, so...

-That's fine. -Awesome, okay.

-Um...

-I mean, I can't even imagine having to do another trip

with just the four of us.

I mean, the boys are inseparable.

And then it's just me and...

-[Laughs] -I mean, I just get drunk.

There's nothing else to do.

-Well, cheers. -Thank you. God.

-It's the fucking best, right?

-[Laughs]

-I can't believe you're here, Jack.

-I can't believe it, either, man.

-Oh, no, no, no, you misunderstand me.

Cat doesn't like people.

Not certain people. People.

I thought she was joking

when she said she invited you up here.

-Honestly, dude, I-I thought Lindsay was --

Like, I still -- I still think this is a joke.

I'm, like, waiting for fucking Ashton Kutcher

to pop out of the couch or something.

-Dude, is Ashton coming?

-He's just joking, Kerry.

-Wait, you guys know Ashton Kutcher?

-Fuck, we used to. -They had a big...

-It doesn't matter. -...thing.

-What, were you guys, like --

The house rules thing -- Were you guys in a frat?

-No, we went to prep school together.

-Yeah, go, Cavs, whoo! -And I was a first-gen.

And Kerry was not an old-money dickbag

like the rest of those guys.

-So you got a lot of these guys coming to these schools

who are, like, deep old money.

Like, fucked-up industrial revolution money.

-Yeah. -Yeah.

Matt was one of the first hedge fund guy's kids

-to roll through. -Mm.

-Your dad was a hedge fund guy?

-Yeah, yeah, he was.

And then he was an insider trading guy.

And then he was a jail guy. -Whoa.

-We lost everything, and my mother had to...

go back to waiting tables at age 45 at a shitty restaurant,

and I had to drop out of school

and take a job bagging groceries,

and then kind of the cherry on top of it all...

my dad killed himself when he was in prison.

-Oh, Jesus Christ, man, I'm sorry.

-And it kind of ruined my mom, and...

she couldn't work anymore, and...

so I decided to start working nights at Blockbuster, and...

when I was there, I pretty quickly identified

that their whole market share was just gonna crumble

with the way that the Internet was gonna be going

with streaming services. -You were how old?

-Oh, 17? -17.

-Yeah, 17, but it wasn't rocket science, right?

Everybody had big-screen TVs because the Korean tech

finally caught up to the need or want of Japanese TVs.

Thanks to an investment from my guy here

and some money over at Netflix

and a few other well-placed investments...

here we are.

-You did this by yourself?

-What? No. -No, no.

-Did you listen to anything I just said?

My life was a Rube Goldberg machine of privilege.

It was like [Whistles]

boarding school, bing, university, boom, investment.

No, man, come on.

No, you don't -- you don't get this by yourself.

You -- You get this with a little bit of capital

and a fuck-ton of luck.

-Mm. Mm-hmm.

-Hey, to luck. -To luck.

-Yeah. -Yeah?

[Glasses clink]

-God, it is so nice to have another adult to talk to.

I mean, Kerry just runs through these girls.

This one's clearly nearing her expiration date.

And they've obviously stopped fucking, right?

-[Chuckles] How -- How can you tell?

-[Laughs] Stop!

"How can you tell?"

Oh, you're hilarious.

Do you ever do stand-up?

-No. -You should.

You could be, like, Sarah Silverman's little sister.

-[Bell dings] Oh!

Time to rotate the mung bean balls.

Becca!

-Thank you, Becca.

-You're so cute. -[Humming]

-No, no, no!

-So, what business are you in, Jack?

-Oh, I'm -- It's -- It's boring. It's renewable energy.

-Oh, dope! Dope. So, like, design or infrastructure?

-No, again, it's solar. It's not--

-Oh, beta, okay, alright.

So, are you enjoying that Tesla tax write-off, then?

-[Chuckles] I s-- Uh...

I sell them.

The solar panels. I go -- I go door to door.

And I-I-I try to sell them to people.

-Jack is being bashful.

He was a lawyer. -Oh, sick!

-Yeah, but then he got hit with an assault charge.

-Oh, misdemeanor or felony?

-Was a felony, but he got it kicked down to a misdemeanor,

and now he's serving probation for three years?

-Five. H--

How do you know that?

-Got a guy at the FBI.

And he feeds me information

whenever I have anybody over to the house.

It's stupid, but it's -- it's all about safety.

[Laughing] Oh, my God, you should see your face.

Come on! Oh, my God.

No, man, that was, uh --

That was -- That was good.

Uh, no, your wife told my wife, man.

-She -- She told Cat that?

-Yeah, man, this is what they do.

They get alone and they just take us down a peg.

So what happened?

-I -- [Chuckles]

I have anger management issues.

-Oh, cool, me too!

-Oh, so that's why you're in therapy.

-Got it, got it, got it, got it, got it.

-Lindsay -- Lindsay told Cat that?

-Oh, no, that was Milton's guy at the FBI.

He told us that. -[Laughs]

It's weird you know that, man.

-What?

-You know, the therapy. That's --

-Dude, I fuckin' love therapy. What are you talking about?

-No, it's great. Just I --

You just -- You know, like, a lot about me,

and I don't really know anything about you.

-Well, if we're keeping track, my man,

you know that my father went to prison

and that he killed himself. -I --

-Hey, that was a super-vulnerable thing

to tell a stranger.

-Thanks, bud. -You're welcome, bro.

-Yeah, okay, so, um, Lindsay --

-Who? -My wife.

-Lindz.

-Yeah, Lindz. -Oh.

-Lindz. Lindz got into an argument with this guy in a bar.

And, uh... -So you hit him.

-No, I mean, it's not -- it's not that simple.

-But you hit the guy. -Yeah, but --

-So it is. -What?

-That simple. -That simple.

-No, I mean, you know, this fucking guy --

this fucking asshole, you know,

he's fucking -- he's getting into it with my wife.

And he has the fucking balls. He calls her a fucking...

-A wh-- A what?

-[Whispering] Cunt.

-Cuh-- What is he saying? -I don't have any idea.

-A cunt. -Oh. Oh.

-Yeah, no, this fucking asshole calls my wife --

-Lindz. -Yes, Lindz, Lindz,

a fucking cunt, you know, so I fucking --

I get really in the guy's face. He fucking shoves me.

And I-I just -- I fucking hit him, man.

I just fucking hit him across his fucking face.

-Yeah, fuck, yeah, dude. -Fuck, yeah.

-And this motherfucker, he ends up being the fucking son

of a prominent state senator, and I'm fucking...

-Oh, fuck. -Oh, fuck.

-Jackie.

That's a -- That's a hell of a break, man.

-Sometimes you don't have any capital,

and you're really fucking unlucky,

and you end up disbarred, on probation,

selling fucking solar panels door to door, so...

-Yeah.

-Hey, here's to bad luck, too, right?

'Cause what's the fucking good without the bad, yeah?

-Yeah. Yeah. -To Jack. Oh.

-And -- And -- And -- And for what it's worth,

I'd have hit the guy, too.

-To Jack. -Thanks.

-Let's get some mung bean bowls. -[Laughs]

-Then we can all go throw up. It'll be great.

♪

-Who's ready for karaoke?!

[All cheer]

♪

♪

-Yeah! Whoo!

-Jack attack! Jack attack!

-[Slurring] ♪ They call the rising...

[Singing indistinctly]

-Rock 'n' roll!

[Both laugh]

Your husband is so funny!

-Oh, he is definitely having fun.

-Guys, take the microphone.

Bum-bum-bum-bum yah!

[Glass shatters]

-No, Jack!

[Laughter] -Oh, my God!

-Oh, what? -Jack.

-Oh, no, I broke -- I got it!

-You guys, it's -- it's okay. -Yeah, Jack!

-We'll have someone clean it up tomorrow.

Don't -- Don't worry about it. -Whoo! Gotta do it again.

-No, I did not keep it tight. -No, honey.

-My son made that one, and it was not his best one.

-So mad at me.

Oh, man, Kerry kept making me take shots,

and I said no, but then I did 'em.

So...

-Hey, Jack? -Hmm?

-Honey? -Yeah?

-This way. -Mm-kay.

-Okay. -Here we go.

Yeah, okay, that's good. Thank you.

-Okay.

-What are you gonna do? -Um, I'm going to go to bed.

-What? No, go have fun.

-Really? -Um, yeah.

You're having fun, right?

-I mean, yeah, I'm having a lot of fun.

-You go.

-Okay. -Okay.

-Alright. -Mm.

-Mnh.

-[Laughs] -Good night.

-Matt. [Laughing]

-What? -Matt, he said --

Guy is so smart, so smart.

He was talking Korean technology,

Japanese green energy, money.

[Scoffs] He's the best.

-He's really smart. Jack, you should talk to him.

You should talk to him over the weekend about business.

I mean, maybe he could help you find a job.

-I mean, I have a job.

-I just -- I meant maybe something that you liked,

because you don't love your job.

And maybe there could be something there,

like a different career or something.

-Okay, good night.

-Good night. There's water by the bed.

[Rock music playing, indistinct singing]

Uh, hi. Um, can I get a tequila?

-Lindsay. -Um, Daniel, right?

-Lindsay.

You don't recognize me?

-Dan.

Dan Bishop.

-Lindsay Simpson. -[Laughs]

-Yes. -Holy shit.

-I know. -Oh, my God.

[Both laugh]

What are you doing here?

-Uh, I work for the Flaxes.

Well, I work for Milton.

But, uh, yeah. I, uh --

-Oh, my God, that --

I mean, wow, you -- you look so different.

-I know. Well, I was a trainer at SeaWorld.

And I quit that when it stopped being cool

and, you know, started fighting the fires up here

and went to Burning Man, met these folks.

It was like -- -Oh, my God!

-It all fell into line.

-That is truly wild.

Um, I just -- Oh, thank you.

Um, so...

-And, uh, your husband, he was what, a...

-He's a lawyer. -...lawyer?

-He's a lawyer. -He is?

-And, uh -- And I work in fashion.

-What? That's amazing. -Yeah.

Thank you. Um, can I just --

-Lindsay Simpson. -Can I get a little --

Just a refill. My song's about to come up.

So I gotta, um...

-Well, let's get you warmed up, girl.

-I gotta go, but you -- you look great.

It's so good to see you.

I'll see you. We'll be seeing you.

-Yeah, I'll be here all weekend. -I'll see you around.

-Don't worry.

♪

[Sighs]

♪

Wow.

-Hi.

-You're back. -I am.

-I was hoping you would come back.

-Oh, my God. -Is Jack okay?

-Mm-hmm. Jack is fine. -Did he throw up or anything?

-No, no, no, no, he's sleeping.

Um, do you remember earlier

when I said that I thought I recognized the waiter?

-Oh, Daniel. -Yeah, Dan.

-Daniel, his name is. -Dan, Dan Bishop.

I went to high school with Dan. -Daniel Bishop.

Shut up. -Yeah, no, I went --

-What are the odds?

-The odds that I, uh, would be a person

who had a lot of sex with someone

who works in your house... -You did sex --

-...are very small!

-Wow! -Yeah.

-That is so hot.

-Well... -[Chuckles]

-That's not all.

Dan had a nickname.

-What was his name?

-Big Dick Dan.

-Big Dick Daniel? -Dan has a massive dick.

-[Laughs] -Yes!

-I love that. -Okay.

-I love that so much. -Well, yeah.

-Oh, my gosh. -It would be so fun

and such a fun story if it wasn't for the fact

that all my sorority sisters knew about it.

When I started dating Jack, they would tease him.

-Does Jack not have a big dick?

-No, Jack has a great dick. He has a great dick.

It's just like -- It's like husband dick.

Like, he's my husband. You know?

-Yeah, I do know, unfortunately. -So he's pretty cool about it.

It's just that...

I-I don't know how he's gonna react.

-Mm. -It's an old wound.

-You know what I mean? -Why does it --

Why does it need to be a thing?

-Well, because I'm gonna be a terrible person

if I don't tell him.

-You don't have to tell him shit.

-What?

-Why do you have to tell him that?

You could just not tell him. -I mean --

In what world do I just ignore Big Dick Dan

for the rest of the week?

-I don't want you to.

But maybe you kind of have to.

Or I could just fire him.

Because then... -What?!

-...you don't have to think about it,

Jack doesn't have to get upset, and then we can just...

-Are you messing with me? -Daniel!

-No! Cat, seriously. -Yes, Mrs. Flax?

-I feel like you -- -No, tequila's great!

Thank you! [Whispering] Stop it!

-I'm sorry. I just want you to have a good time, okay?

Okay, so then maybe for tonight, we can just...

forget about it?

-Hey, can you keep a secret?

-Yeah. -Keep it a secret.

♪

[Laughter, cheering]

♪

-[Vomiting]

♪

♪

-Oh.

Oh, my --

Oh, fuck. Oh.

-Babe, this doesn't even have to be an argument.

I can take the plane and be back in time from Dubai

to see his art installation.

-Except I-I don't believe you.

You're not gonna make it back in time,

and then I will end up having to console him.

-Why does he wear so much eyeliner to those things?

-Because it's part of his look.

He's establishing himself as an artist.

-Well, I don't wanna raise a weird kid

who dresses in black all the time.

-If he's weird, then he's gonna be --

-Jack, hey, morning! You sleep okay?

-Hi. Is Lindz up?

-Uh, no, no.

She, um...

I'm -- I am like -- Uh, we -- we -- we -- we --

we got after it last night, huh?

-You definitely took it up a notch, my man,

but, hey, when you work hard, you get to play hard.

Am I right?

You going for a run?

-Yeah, yeah, no, gonna, you know, try to sweat it out

before I put it back in.

-Detox, retox, circle of life.

You should use the gym. -The gym?

-There's one downstairs and then another one down below

by the pool. -The pool?

-Yeah, the one downstairs is kind of sterile.

-Mm. Agreed, I prefer the one at the guest house.

-The guest house?

-Also, Kerry's in the gym downstairs,

and he is a lot in there.

-At the guest house? -No, downstairs.

-But I think Carrie's at the sauna.

-Oh. -Where?

-By the pool. -Which is?

-Down below. -Down below.

-Great.

-[Clicks tongue]

There it is. -[Chuckles]

-[Imitates gunshots]

-Have fun.

-Sweat it out.

-He's gonna get lost. -Yeah.

-[Grunting]

Hey, buddy!

[Grunts]

I miss you, Daddy!

I miss you, Daddy!

I hate you, Daddy!

[ "The Swimming Song" plays]

♪

-♪ This summer I went swimming

♪ This summer I might have drowned ♪

♪ But I held my breath and I kicked my feet ♪

♪ And I moved my arms around

♪ Moved my arms around

♪ This summer I swam in the ocean ♪

♪ And I swam in a swimming pool ♪

♪ Salt my wounds, chlorine my eyes ♪

-Hey. -Hey.

-How you doing? -I'm good, brother.

Just enjoying the bounty of a beautiful day.

-Right on. -Hey, you're Jack, right?

Lindsay's husband. -Yeah, yeah, man, you guys --

-Man, it is great to meet you.

-[Panting] Yeah. You guys -- You guys, too.

I'm looking for the -- the guest house.

-Which one? -The, um...

The one with the pool?

Oh, yeah, it's just right down that way.

-You're heading there, right?

-That way? -Yeah.

-So I just -- Okay.

-Follow the path, brother, you'll get there.

♪

-Oh, hey! Whoa. I'm here. Sorry. I'm -- I'm here.

-[Laughs] You almost saw me naked.

-I almost did. -Almost.

-Almost. Oh!

[Both laugh]

-One more! -Oh, please stop doing that.

-I'm just kidding. I wouldn't do that.

-Okay.

-Maybe I would. -I --

[Both laugh]

-Oh, my God, how fucking absurd is this place?

-Thank you. Thank you. This is like --

I've never seen anything like this.

-I, like, need this to work out with me and Ker.

I can't go back to being poor.

-Back to -- Back to being a model, yeah?

-I'm an actress. -Oh, that's cool.

Have I seen you in anything? -Do you watch "Murderer Minds"?

-No. -I was murdered on it.

-Cool.

-I also sing, dance, paint.

Run a wellness Instagram account with over 50,000 followers.

-Oh, wow. You got a lot going on, huh?

-Not really. I just try to speak it into existence.

-Like "The Secret."

-No, it's not a secret. I just don't wanna work hard.

Okay.

I'm bored.

-Cool.

[Johnnie Frierson's "Have You Been Good to Yourself"plays]

♪

-♪ Have you been good to yourself? ♪

♪ Have you been getting your proper rest? ♪

♪ Have you been sleeping at least eight hours? ♪

♪ Have you been eating the right kind of food? ♪

♪

♪ Have you been good to yourself? ♪

♪ Oh

♪ Have you been good

♪ Have you been good to yourself? ♪

♪ If you're not gonna be good to yourself ♪

-[Retching]

-♪ Then you're not gonna be good to others ♪

-Oh, my God. -Yeah.

-[Speaking indistinctly]

-What are you getting? -Mischief.

-Alright, okay.

How about a little -- Ooh, this one has some secrets.

-Did you guys know that nearly 3% of Atlantic glaciers

is penguin urine?

-Care, who told you that?

-I learned it at Harvard.

-[Laughs]

That's awesome. You went to Harvard.

-Yeah, you didn't know?

-No, no, I didn't.

-Lindz, just have one.

Come on, we're wine tasting in like 30 minutes.

This'll get you back in the game.

-I know. I just -- I feel like I'm dying right now.

-Did you drink the electrolytes? -Yeah.

-Oh. I'll text Milton and have him put another kit in the room.

-Okay. -Just for what --

I'm sorry. Hey, who -- who is Milton?

-He's Milton.

-What would you say his job is?

-Jack. -Um...

I think he was, like, a party planner

or maybe an interior designer.

Um, Matt, babe, how would you describe what Milton does?

-Uh...

he's, uh -- he's Milton.

-Okay, and then the, uh -- the -- the guys --

I met the guy watering the plant today with the mullet.

-Uh, that is Daniel.

-Dan-- And -- And Daniel is-- -Oh, Dan!

Yeah, Brother Dan. Dan is the man!

-Daniel is Daniel, and I don't want to talk about it anymore.

-It's high acid.

-What I do want to talk about is my -- Babe?

Babe, I'm trying to --

I'm having a moment. -What, babe, what?

-Please. -I'm talking.

-I'm talking, too!

What I do want to talk about is my friend Lindz.

Matt, did you know that Lindz was studying at FIDM

before Jack got disbarred and her mother died?

-Oh, no, I didn't know that. -Yeah.

-Jack didn't get disbarred. He's just --

-She wanted to make upscale sustainable clothing.

-You want to make upscale sustainable clothing?

-I've been thinking about it, and I wanna help Lindz

realize her dream of becoming a girlboss.

-Yes, girlboss.

-Wait, what? -Wait, what?

-I think we should invest in our friend Lindz

and help make her dream a reality.

-Hey.

Sure, yeah. Right on. Congrats, Lindz.

Let's do it. -Yeah!

-Let's do it. -Congratulations!

Yes. Cheers. -What --

-Jackie. -Cheers!

-Yeah, no, wh-- -Congratulations.

-How generous. Thank you!

Oh, my God. -Of course. Yeah.

-So, I-I mean, what --

So do you wanna do the store? Or do you wanna do a line?

-Oh, well, I haven't really thought about it.

Let's talk about it later, okay? -Okay.

-We gotta do wine tasting first, remember?

-What just happened?

-Wine tasting is happening. -Whoo!

-It's this cute little place down the road.

All the workers who pick the grapes

are given insurance and livable wages.

And we have to support them.

-Matt, do you wanna -- do you want me to pitch in?

I could just sell my car or something.

It'll probably... [Laughter]

-This guy! -We got it.

-He's so funny. -You know...

Jack, I will take payment from you

in karate-chopping my enemies.

-Kerry, Kerry, did you hear that?

It was so funny. -Hilarious.

-Finish your drinks.

Finish your drinks, dummies. -Let's go, come on.

-Okay, okay, bottoms up. -Okay.

-Yes. -Jack, are you gonna drive?

-Yeah, I'll drive Lindsay and I separate,

and we'll meet you guys there, yeah?

What the fuck just happened? -I know.

Okay, this is now not just a fun weekend,

this is also a business weekend.

She could become my colleague.

Keeping it tight,

maybe not joke about us being poor at the dinner table?

-But we're -- we're not poor.

-No, I know that we're not poor,

but compared to them, we definitely are.

-Right, but compared to them, 99.9% of the world is.

I mean, Kerry's grandfather invented Tater Tots,

and Matt's worth like a billion dollars.

-How do you know?

-I had service in the restaurant and Googled him.

-Wait, why -- why'd you Google him?

-Why'd I -- He ran a background check on me.

I can't Google him? -No, I just --

-You said everybody Googles. -Okay, just stop saying Google.

♪

-Get your nose in the glass.

Get it in there. Further, further.

Come on, let's go ask Georges.

Get it in there.

Georges, am I on pills, or does this taste more like a Burgundy?

-[Laughs] No, you're not.

Actually, it's because it has a lower alcohol content

than most California Pinots.

-Mm. -It's because we're biodynamic.

-Obviously. -Now, correct me if I'm wrong,

um, but aren't you only one of four

biodynamic vineyards in California?

Am I right?

-One of four certified by the French government.

-Ah. -Yes.

-I love France.

-Yeah, she does! -Yeah, baby!

-That's a great place.

-I love France.

-Honestly, I would love to go to Provence.

-Oh, we're going.

After you set up the line.

-You're -- You're really serious about this, aren't you?

-Be pretty fucked up if I wasn't.

-[Laughs]

-Hey, babe? -Yeah, babe?

-What -- What do we like?

-Oh, what do you like?

-Um, oh, I like the white.

-Which? -Oh, um...

a-all of them.

-Get all the whites!

-[Clicks tongue] -You can spit the wine.

You don't have to swallow it every time.

-Oh! No, I like swallowing.

-You heard the lady. Why don't we do a case of each?

-Oh.

Okay. [Laughs]

Okay, um, why don't I bring those to the car?

And you can finish up your glasses here?

-Actually, Georges, you know what?

Why don't you just, uh -- Why don't you just double it?

-Oh. [Stammers] Double it?

-Yeah, two cases of each. -Each.

-[Laughs] Okay, um, well, sorry.

I went to Berkeley, so we did --

Numbers were just shapes. -Sure, sure, sure.

-So, you want two of both varietals

or four of both varietals?

-Yes, both. -Yes, both.

-Each. -Each.

-Wonderful.

-That's white. Yeah. -Oh. Oopsies.

It's rosé.

-I don't think -- Is that how they make rosé?

-Mm-hmm, you just mix red and white.

-Okay. Hi, hi.

-Hi. Um, which one did you like?

-I, uh...

-Hi. Thank you. -Try the rosé.

-No, it's -- we're great.

Which -- Which wine did I like, Carrie?

-Jackie likes the penis noir.

[Laughs]

-[Laughing] Pen-- Pinot Noir.

-'Cause he likes the penis! -Okay.

-Okay, hey, so I think we should get some wine.

Can you take care of that? -Yeah.

Yeah, no, I'll -- I'll get some wine.

That's -- That's good. Can you maybe just -- No, okay.

-Bye.

-Excuse me, sir? -Yeah?

-I guess I need a bottle of, um, the -- the Pinot Noir.

-Okay, just a bottle?

-Yeah, just -- just a bottle, please?

Can I see the price sheet? -No.

I'm sorry. I -- It's market price.

So it just kind of like is what I feel at the moment.

-Whoa! -Oh, my God.

-Oh! Okay. -There she goes.

-Okay. Just -- -There she goes.

-Oh, boy. -She's fun.

-You okay? -She's fun.

-Ooh, maybe we -- maybe we get to some water there, Care-Bear.

-No water. [Muttering]

-Hey, Kerry, do you wanna help me out here, bud?

-Dude, she's like 11 pounds. You got it.

-Okay. -You're doing great, Jack.

-Okay. -Whee!

-Okay, I'm just gonna... -Ballet!

-Turn her on her side. -Oh, that's sweet.

That's sweet. -No, well, I just don't want her

to throw up on those hair extensions.

Take off those shoes. They're very expensive.

-I have those. My wife has those.

Yeah.

-Carrie is drunk. -Yeah.

-Maybe we ought to, like...

Yeah?

-Yeah, yeah.

-Okay. -Sure.

-[Laughs] You're terrible.

-I know. So bad.

She's the worst, though.

[Laughter] -No, you did not say that.

You didn't. -Hey.

-Oh, my God. -Uh, we may need to Uber home.

-Ooh, we don't have room? -Yeah, no.

-Hey, I got the wine.

-Hey, um... -Yeah, what?

-Just -- Why did you only get a bottle?

-Well, because Carrie said it was my favorite.

It's the penis noir,

and then Matt said it would go with the BBQ tonight.

-Okay, but why didn't you get a case?

-'Cause they're, like, really expensive.

-Like how expensive? -Like -- Like, a lot.

-What's a lot? -Like $50 a bottle.

-Oh. Okay, well, just put it on the Mastercard.

We can afford that.

-You wanna waste $300 on six bottles of wine?

-A case is 12. -A case is six.

-A case of beer is 12. -A case of beer is 24.

-What is a case of 12? -I have no idea, White Claw?

-Just buy it. -Lindsay, that's a car payment.

-Hey, Georges, I'm so sorry.

Uh, hi. -Hi.

-My husband made a mistake.

We are actually going to take a case of the pinot grigio.

-Pinot Noir. -Of the Pinot Noir.

Absolutely. And you know what?

Actually, we're gonna get two cases, right?

Because we can have one with dinner tonight,

and then we can take one home, right, Jack?

It's gonna go great with the dinner.

-Yeah, you know, you do get a discount if you buy a case.

-That's great. -So just charge the same card?

-Yes, absolutely. -Okay.

-Thank you so much. -That is...so thoughtful of you.

-Ugh, oh, my gosh. It's the least we could do.

Right, Jack? -Yeah, yeah. You know, I just --

I just had a thought.

What if -- What if we take the Tesla back

since we're waiting for the rest of the wine to show up,

and you guys just take my car,

and we'll see you back there, yeah?

-You sure? -Yeah.

-Do you know how to drive a Tesla, Jack?

-Do I...

I think the real question, Ker,

is do you know how to drive a Corolla?

-[Laughs] So funny.

-You -- You put it in drive?

-Yep, just start it, drive, you're good to go.

Alright. Okay. -Okay.

-Okay, cool, we'll just do a little switcheroo.

-Cute, love it. -Right.

-Thanks, Jackie. -Okay.

-Definitely sitting up here.

-Thank you. -Watch your head, Carrie.

-Ooh! -Good work.

-Oh, she lost her little crown.

-Yeah, that's okay.

Yeah.

It's like origami.

[Car door closes, tires screech]

-Bye!

-We need to get rid of this fucking wine.

-What? Why?

-Because we can't afford it.

-Why? -Because...

[Grunts]

...it's $300 a bottle.

-What? -Yeah.

You said that it was $50.

-Because I didn't want you to get pissed off at me

for spending $300 on a bottle of wine.

-So, you lied to me. -I -- No.

No, not doing this right now.

Georges, hi!

Hi, you know what, I think my wife

is actually the one who made a mistake here.

We need to return this wine please.

-Oh, no, we don't do that. -You don't do what?

-We don't do refunds. [Scoffs]

-Okay. Okay. [Laughter]

-We're good. Look, hey, hey.

-Yeah? -I work in sales, okay?

I get it, right?

You gotta get your nut here, right?

-Okay, no-no-no-no-no. I got my nut.

And I got their nut, and I got your nut,

and I got all your nuts all over my face, okay?

And we still don't do refunds.

-No, wait, look -- fuck, come on.

Come on, hey, hey, look -- -Jack?

It's still in the box, right?

It's still organic.

-Biodynamic. -And overpriced.

You can take this back -- -No, no, that's okay.

-Jack? -He needs to take this back!

-Jack! -What?

-We have to keep it. -Why?

Because we said we would drink it at dinner tonight.

-Fuck!

♪

-You do not get to be mad at me about this.

-I don't get to be mad at you about this.

-Don't do that, Jack.

-Do what? -Don't do the thing.

-What thing? -The lawyer thing.

-I'm not doing a lawyer thing, I'm just...

making a counterpoint. -Oh, there it is.

You lied to me. It's as simple as that.

-Okay, um, I'd just argue that I lied to you

because you're really embarrassed of me.

-I am not embarrassed of you.

-I -- mm, see, you want us to be these people,

and we're just not, and, like, that's okay.

These people are miserable and drunks.

-They're drunks?

-They haven't stopped drinking since we got here.

-It's her birthday weekend. -Which she didn't tell you.

-Because she didn't want it to be weird.

-We are currently sitting in a car that is worth $100,000.

Inside of that car, there is $150,000 worth of wine.

This isweird.

[Piano playing discordantly]

♪

-Hi.

-Hey! -Hi!

-You changed.

-Oh, it's murder mystery night.

Milton made it a Roaring '20s theme.

-Oh, um, I just --

I didn't bring anything to wear.

-Oh, that's okay, Milton took care of it all.

There's some stuff in your room, go get changed,

and then come back up here whenever you're ready,

and we're all gonna go down to the farmhouse.

-Okay -- Oh, we brought the wine.

-Wine? -From, um...

from the tasting. -Oh, right!

Great, um, yeah, you can just put that downstairs

in the cellar and then go get changed.

We're gonna kill each other! [Laughter]

-Hey, Jack, tonight... -Yeah?

-...why don't you pick on a vase your own size, see?!

-Argh, ya see?

[Chuckles]

♪

♪

-Well, good thing we bought two.

-Okay.

♪

[Scoffing]

♪

-They know my sizes? How do they do that?

-God, I want a Milton.

♪

[Discordant piano notes play]

-[British accent] Listen up!

It seems there be a murderer in our midst.

-[Gasping]

-My name is Police Chief Danny O'Sullivan!

And if there's one thing I won't stand,

it's murderers in Chicago.

-Ooh! [Italian accent] Manila!

-Now, it seems that someone's been feeding me intel

on the inside.

Isn't that right, Becca Brasco?

-Yeah, see?!

Me and my crew,

we've been taking over the South Side, see?!

When there was one person

standing in our way...

Jack, that's -- that's your turn.

-Yeah, you go. -It's your turn.

-Read the card. -I just read it?

-Just read the card. -Just the card? Okay, um...

-Where did these cards come from?

-"I'm Michael O'Malley from the South Side.

My brother Patrick was murdered..."

-Okay, now, Jack, can you please commit to the character?

-Do an accent. -Can you give a --

It's so freeing when you just read it

with an accent. -Okay, yeah, okay.

Okay, um -- [Clearing throat]

[High-pitched Irish] "I'm Michael O'Malley

from the South Side.

My brother Patrick was murdered.

People think I did it to take control of the potato trade,

but that's impossible because I was on the North Side

with Don Kerryon--" That's Kerry.

-Ahh, that's-ah me!

[Overlapping chatter]

Ker-leone!

-"While I was on the North Side with Don Ker-leone!"

-True, true, he tells the true.

-Because there's not one person in this room

that didn't stand to gain from Patrick's death.

Especially...the wife!

[All gasping] -You did it!

-Oh! -You did it.

You did it. -Let's just pick up the cues.

Just pick up the cues, everyone.

-Seriously, take this. -Becca was a Fulbright scholar.

She's completely wasting her life here.

Love you, Becky. -Okay, sorry, Becca.

Total respect. -Yeah, that's embarrassing.

-[Clearing throat] -You got it, babe, go.

You got it. -"It couldn't've been me.

I loved my husband.

We immigrated here together from Kilkenny.

On that ride across the Atlantic,

we would talk about the better life America would show us.

We heard that there are no cats in America,

and the streets are made of cheese.

-Is she going off script? -Yeah, it's brilliant.

-"Upon arriving in New York,

Patrick took me in his..." -Chicago! Chicago.

-"Chicago, Patrick took me in his arms and said,

'We will never want for anything again.'

And then one of you monsters murdered him!"

[Screaming, cheering]

[Up-tempo rock]

♪

♪

♪

-Dude's got cryptocurrency.

Secret currency.

Right? It's just -- it's an idea.

Where do we put the crypto?

In storage.

Is it a fuckin' crypto bank? I don't know yet.

You alright, bud?

-I'm just in a dark -- a dark hole right now.

-Come here, come here, come here, come here...

-Then come sit, come sit, come sit.

-[Sobbing]

-This is how we come out the other side.

He goes in here... -[Sobbing]

-Just give it -- watch, watch.

Five, four, three, two, one.

-[Inhales deeply]

What's up, guys? Alright. Crypto?

So what you're gonna want... -He's good.

-...is you're gonna want cold storage.

Cold storage can make it so it can't be encrypted

by other people. -That's it right there.

-So you have a passcode which is gonna break it up...

-And the Boner Award... [Laughter]

...for Worst Job Keeping Their Facts Straight goes to...

-Oh, I know who that is.

-Jack!

-Oh, Jack! There you go. -Yay, Jack!

-[Growling]

Ah! [Laughs]

-Uh -- fuck you.

[Laughter] -Yay!

-Oh, my God. -You have to use that, Jack.

-He's a good sport.

And last but not least,

the award for Finest Performance goes to...

-[Imitates drumming] -...Lindsay!

[Cheering]

-Oh, my God!

I would like to thank all of you, blah-blah-blah,

this is amazing! [Laughter]

-Oh, my God, of course you think Lindz gave the best performance.

[Snorts] -What are you talking about?

Lindz was great.

-Thank you. -Oh, no, she's amazing.

I -- Becca was -- pfft! -- wet. [Chuckles]

But -- But Daniel knows Lindz from high school, so...

-She rocked it, she was in all the plays.

-I think he's a little biased.

-Wait, high school?

-Yeah. -Daniel...

Daniel and Lindz went to high school together.

[Chuckles]

And they used to, you know, they used to...

-Cat. -...whatever.

-Oh.

-They used to what?

-No, well, we just -- we went to high school together.

It's not a big deal.

You knew that. -I didn't.

I didn't know that, Dan.

-Oh.

Yeah, well...oh.

-Dan?

Dan...

Dan, oh...

You're Dan.

-Yeah, brother.

-May I speak to you privately over there please?

-Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

-Uh, anybody want a refill? -Blue penis.

-Over here.

-Babe, they called him Big Dick Dan

'cause he's very well-endowed.

-[Laughing] Oh!

Brother Dan's packing a real ham cannon, huh?

-I see that for Dan, yeah.

-But it's, like, a -- it's like a thing for Jack

because he doesn't have -- well, he's --

-'Cause -- 'Cause, is Jack not packing a ham cannon?

-No, he has...

-[Whispering] Is that Big Dick Dan?

-Okay, can we just -- -No, yes or no question.

Is that Big Dick Dan?

-Yes.

Yes, it is. -Okay.

Okay.

I am not going to point out that you just ripped me a new asshole

in the car for lying to you about a bottle of wine.

-I -- But you kind of are by saying that, so...

-That is fair.

So I'm not gonna do that.

And I am not gonna freak out now that I have met Dan.

-Which, Jack, honey, that really was so long ago.

And it's great that you wouldn't freak out about it

because it was another person, it was another time, you know?

-Yeah, yeah, okay. -Okay.

-Okay, yeah. -Okay.

-So I'm just gonna...

I'm just gonna push this, like, deep...

deep...

down inside. -Okay.

-And we are just gonna deal with this when we get home, okay?

-Okay. -Okay.

-Okay. -Okay.

-I am so sorry. -Thanks, Cat.

Not your fault.

-Hey, bro, if it makes you feel any better...

Bec and I slept together, like, two months ago

and Carrie does not care at all.

[Chuckles]

-Actually, I didn't know that, but...

I don't care.

And after hearing about Daniel and his ham cannon,

I'm probably gonna have sex with him, too.

Is that okay with you, Ker?

-I seriously do not care.

-And I'm not judging anyone here.

-That's beautiful, brother.

I mean, at the end of the day, it's just sex, right?

Yes, I've had sex with your wife,

and I've had sex with Becca.

And it sounds like I'm gonna have sex with Carrie.

-[Laughs]

-And that's awesome.

But what you have, brother, that's deeper than penetration.

You have a life.

And I think it's a great honor

to be bonded like this to another man.

Look...

Lindsay taught me so much about sex,

and I taught her a bunch of cool stuff, too.

And you're still reaping those benefits today.

So...

thank you.

And you're welcome.

-I'm welcome? -Yeah.

I mean, obviously, we're gonna have different experiences

because we have different body types.

You're shorter than I am.

-I'm -- are you saying I'm smaller than you?

-Yeah, well, you're like five -- -W-W-What the fuck is that

supposed to mean? -Jack?

-It's okay, brother. -That I'm smaller than you?

I'm fucking shorter than you? -Jack. Jack.

-No, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, this is very --

-Triggering? -Thank you, Ker,

not really the time right now. -Sounds like we just got --

-Don't touch me, man! -Oh, God! Oh!

-Shit! -Jack!

-I'm sorry, I'm really sorry.

Are you okay? -Give me that!

-No -- whoa -- no, no!

[Indistinct shouting] -Take his power!

Grab it!

[Indistinct shouting]

-Careful! Careful!

[Thudding] Oh! Oh! Oh!

-No more! Please! I wanna stop!

I wanna stop!

I wanna stop! Please stop.

I wanna -- yes!

-Aah.

-Well, my thirst for blood remains unquenched.

-Yeah, yeah -- hey, fellas, this is getting

"hard-on" to watch. -[Laughs]

-I have lower back issues. -Oh, me too, man.

-And the winner of the weirdest fight in history...

is Jack! [Cheering]

-[Groans] Oh, God.

[Door slams]

-Lindsay? -Dan?!

You get the fuck outta here now!

Go upstairs, go to bed. Think about what you did.

-Goddamn it. -I'll see you in the morning.

Hey, thank you for all your hard work tonight, by the way.

Thank you very much. -I'll see you upstairs, Dan.

-Excellent storytelling.

-That guy's the best. Really lovely.

-That was impressive. -He is the fucking best, man.

-[Panting]

-♪ I know you're lost

-Why are you sad? -Because...

Jack was doing so much better.

[Coughing]

You know?

-But he won the fight. -Oh, my God.

He's gonna actually go to jail.

-Why? -Because he assaulted Dan,

and Dan's gonna press charges.

-Oh, no, he won't.

Daniel has signed multiple NDAs --

[Inhaling] -- and he gets asshole tax

every time something like this happens.

-Oh, what is asshole tax?

-Daniel and Becca get an extra ten grand

every time my husband or a guest is an asshole.

-Wow.

-This happens a lot.

-Okay. -He makes way too much money

to try to... [Blows raspberry]

-Yeah.

-I'm gonna get my...

my girl.

My girl, Gigi.

-Gigi? -Yeah.

She is the solution.

-Gigi is the solution? -She's a witch.

She's a good witch.

[Sighs]

I have to go to bed.

-♪ You talk about today

-Good night.

-Pot stickers!

-God, I hate you.

-That's okay.

I suck.

-Well, you took the fun right out of that.

Here, let me carry you to bed, come on.

-♪ Feels like a curse, sounds like a dream ♪

♪ Don't know what it means

-[Sighs] -♪ But it means everything

Mm.

[Birds chirping]

[Sighs]

-Ow! Oh!

[Both groaning]

God! Why'd you kick me?

-[Slurred] She does that.

-Why were you on the floor? -I...

I guess I didn't wanna wake you guys up?

I don't...

[Door opening]

-Hey, Dan. -Yeah, brother?

-I'm sorry about last night, man.

-No hard feelings, brother.

I'm sorry, too.

[Door closing]

-"The lady of the house requests your presence

in the grace garden

for a healing cacao ceremony at 10:00 AM."

-Why is she in our bed?

-I don't know, Jack, why?

Do you wanna fight her, too? -No, I don't...

[Sobbing] Fuck!

How do these people fucking live like this?

It's -- -Jack.

-What the fuck happened last night?

-Jack, grow the fuck up.

You could've gone to jail again.

-I didn't go -- -I'm going to get coffee.

[Birds chirping]

Hi. -Good morning.

-Good morning.

Uh, listen, I...

I just wanted to talk to you about last night.

I'm really sorry, and I just...

I don't know, I just feel like it was so --

-Very avoidable.

-Um...

yeah, yeah, I mean, I...

definitely could've talked to Jack sooner.

-Or you could've not told me.

-Right.

-There's an espresso if you want coffee.

-Okay.

[Machine whirring]

[Whirring stops] What the fuck?

[Machine whirring] Oh, goddamn it!

[Sighs]

-You must be Lindz.

I've heard about you.

-I'm sorry, have we -- have we met?

-I'm Gigi.

Catherine's shaman.

I'm really looking forward to...

healing together today.

Mars...

is the god of war.

Scorpio is the sign of the self.

[Sighs]

You're at war with yourself.

[Machine whirring]

But...

we can work on that together.

Today.

[Whirring stops, coffee trickles]

[Chuckles]

See you in the garden.

[Soft woodwinds playing]

♪

♪

[Ethereal vocalizing]

♪

♪

I am incredibly honored

to be sitting with you all in intention today...

at this cacao ceremony.

Please take a moment to thank yourself...

-Thank you. -Thank you.

-And please thank one another

for sharing this time together.

-Thank you. -Thank you.

-Thank you. -Thank you.

-We are trying to connect on a deeper level,

on a human level, so we can see each other.

We have already created our sacred space.

We each have our own individual bowls of cacao.

Take a sip of the cacao, please,

as you're sitting with your intention.

This world is such a crazy place.

So...

hectic.

So...

ego...

ic.

We spend all of this time

traveling through all these years,

trying to get to a certain place of hope,

up this hill, to a destination?

And then we wake up in the morning, and we step outside.

We take a deep breath, or we just -- we get really high...

...when we want to really be yelling,

at the top of our lungs, "Hey! What's going on?!"

Wouldn't it be incredible

if you could just turn to your partner and say...

"Do you know what I want? What I really, really want?"

And they could look at you,

and they would know exactly what you want,

what you really, really wanted, because it's a safe space.

And you could tell them, without any stuttering,

no "I want, uh, I may want, uh --"

You know what you really, really want.

They know.

You both want to be...

friends.

Possibly lovers.

But you wanna be seen.

Yes? Yes.

[Inhales deeply, exhales]

Please take another sip of the cacao.

Please repeat after me.

I love you. I'm sorry. Please forgive me.

-I love you. I'm sorry. Please forgive me.

-I love you. I'm sorry. Please forgive me.

-I love you. I'm sorry. Please forgive me.

-I love you. I'm sorry. Please forgive me.

-I love you. I'm sorry. Please forgive me.

-Again!

-I love you. I'm sorry. Please forgive me.

-Again!

-I love you! I'm sorry! Please forgive me!

-Thank you.

Now that we are done with the cacao ceremony,

I would like to invite you all

to take a moment to dance with me in intention.

[Didgeridoo and drums playing]

♪

Yes.

Think about your heart.

What is it feeling? Is it a give?

Is it a take? Are you taking too much?

Do not be shy.

Explore what love means for you.

Nothing is wrong, everything is right.

We're not dancing, love is moving us.

Incredible.

Powerful group here.

Be intentional.

This is what I wanna see.

Are you guys feeling this?

I am just so overcome with the whirlwind of love.

[Up-tempo music playing]

♪

♪

♪

-Mmm.

So, let's continue.

From the front of the house are...

-The pinot.

-Pinot which? -Noir.

-Good. Good, good, good.

And what's behind the house?

-The shiraz. -Very close.

It's actually syrah.

But you know what's kind of funny?

It's the same thing. -What?

-Shiraz is just... Australian syrah,

but the French don't like the Australians,

so they were like, [French accent] "No, you can --

you can't call it 'syrah,'" and they were like,

[Australian accent] "Well, what do we call it?"

And they were like, "You call it whatever

you want, but not syrah,"

and they were like, "Fine, we'll...

we'll call it shiraz."

[Laughter]

It's the same thing as sauvi B and Saint Cyr.

It's just a marketing question, you know?

-Yeah.

-Oh, man. -You are great, man.

-Thanks, man. -No, like,

I cannot wait to get to know you better.

-When are we gonna do that?

-You know, with Cat and Lindsay working together,

we may hang out all the time.

-They are? -Yeah, remember?

At brunch, she said you'd fund the thing.

-Oh, my God, so much has happened this weekend.

-I know. -What's the company?

Sustainable clothing something.

Oh, that's a pretty good idea.

Can I hit you with a truth bomb?

-Blow it up.

-Don't let Lindz...

get involved with Cat.

And don't -- And don't you get involved with Cat, either.

-Why? -[Sighs]

Cat is my wife and my raison d'etre

and my light and my path forward,

and all of that, so if she ever hears that I said this,

I will deny it to the hill, then I'll say that

you were fucked up and made it up, but...

Cat's kind of a...

an experience hoarder.

And she loves to feel like a patron of the arts.

Like a de Medici from Italy in the Renaissance,

but this is the problem, right?

Is that she holds on to these experiences,

and if you try to take 'em away, she's like, "No!

This is my stuff!"

And she forgets that there's people

on the other end of those experiences,

and those people inevitably end up on the...

on the trash pile of her hoard.

And I don't want that to happen to you and Lindz.

I mean, just -- let me just --

let me just throw something out at you here.

Do you know that last year

I was funding three nonprofit theater companies in Astoria,

one alpaca farm in Argentina...

and two equestrian academies

in Atlanta and Austin, and that --

that was just because she liked the "A" sounds back to back.

-It's called assonance. -Really?

-Yeah.

-Fuck, there is a word for everything.

But this is what I'm saying, okay?

Cat doesn't follow through.

All of those businesses I just mentioned?

Guess where they are.

-I don't know. -[Imitates booming]

That -- That's them not existing.

They don't exist anymore.

They all went under because Cat got bored with them.

Yeah.

Cat thinks I lack compassion.

But she only thinks that because I make so much money.

Just because I make a lot of money

does not therefore mean I lack compassion, right?

Right, Jack? I need you to say "right."

-Yeah, right, no. -[Sighs]

My biggest fear is that...

Cat's only with me because I make such a fuck ton of money.

-Fuck. -Does that sound like somebody

who lacks compassion? -No, I think you feel

a lot of stuff.

-Thank you. Thank you, yes.

I do. -Can I --

Can I tell you something?

-God, I wish you would.

-I'm afraid Lindsay's gonna leave me

because I don't make enough money.

-That's like the yin to my yang.

-She wants me to ask you about a job.

-Do you want a job? -I don't know, doing what?

-Well, what do you wanna do?

-I don't know what I wanna do.

-Then why would I have a job for you, my man?

You know?

My advice -- My advice, Jack,

you just -- you figure out what you wanna do.

And you go do it.

-We're not really silly anymore. We're not silly people.

We're so serious.

-[Groans] Daniel, I'm sorry, but your --

your fingers feel like worms,

and if we just take a quick little break --

I feel like I'm getting buried in the dirt.

-Absolutely. -Thanks, Becca.

-Ugh, Lindz... -Hmm?

not to be serious, but...

we gotta talk about the line.

-[Gasps] Yes.

Okay, okay. Local, sustainable.

-Local, sustainable, and, yeah, I'm, like,

I'm thinking about, like, textures and patterns.

-Mm. -And...

choreography and rhythms and emotions and thoughts.

-Well, hemp is overdone.

-Completely. -Mm-hmm.

-Couldn't agree more.

-Something strong.

-Yeah, strong like, um...

trees -- mm. -Mm.

-Could we make it out of bark?

I don't know that I've seen that done before.

-Mm-mm. Hmm.

-You're right, yeah, no, that's a --

that's a bad idea.

[Laughter] That one was the mushrooms.

-[Laughs] -I may have gotten

too much mushrooms.

-Too much mushrooms.

-Too much.

-Wait, what? -Too much.

We were supposed to micro-dose.

-Micro-dose? -Mm, yeah.

That's where you do, like, a little bit of...

a little bit of mushrooms over a sustained period so you --

you don't get, like, super fucked-up,

you just become, sort of, enlightened and...

-We all micro-dosed on mushrooms?

-Yes. -When?

-Um...

since dinner on Friday.

-So, all weekend?

-Well, I don't...

No, not -- not, like, all weekend.

-Friday? -It was...

in the mung bean bowls on Friday, and then the...

the bloody marys and the BBQ.

-And today? -And just now at the cacao.

-So all weekend.

-Lindz...

-[Laughs]

-How dare you.

-[Laughs] -How dare you

incept my mind with your time?

What is...? Time is crazy.

-Oh, my God.

-Sorry I didn't even realize that we were

at the end of the weekend.

-We're on drugs? -Oh, I feel bad. Yes.

[Laughter]

We are. -Oh, my God, no.

I'm having a bad moment.

-Oh, no-no-no, no-no-no.

Let's "sprin" -- spin this straw into gold.

-No, Jack said we couldn't do drugs.

Jack said we couldn't do -- Jack can't do drugs.

-He actually can do them pretty well.

-No, no, like, he can't do them, like, he gets drug tested.

-Oh. -Yeah.

-What a twist.

-[Laughs] -No, no. Don't worry about it.

Gigi has a guy that's -- it'll all get sorted out.

We'll take care of it. -Oh, my God, no,

but he has a guy, he has a --

he has a guy, his name is Doug, and it's his officer.

It's his -- It's his...

"he's in trouble" person.

He has to make sure he's not in trouble.

-He -- [Chuckles]

Doug is so irrelevant in this story.

I can't even -- I can't even tell you

how much you don't have to worry about Doug.

-I don't understand, and the bad feeling is not going away.

-No-no-no-no-no. We're above that.

In fact, we were doing ayahuasca

with Elon and Grimes right before they had the baby,

-A-Ash-12-17-50,000... -I think...

I think I -- I need to go. -Jackie.

-Oh, my God. -Hi.

-Hi. -Okay.

-Okay, yeah, Doug, yeah, this is not a thing.

[Gentle guitar music playing]

♪

♪

-♪ Everything is free now

♪ That's what they say

♪ Everything I ever done

♪ Gonna give it away

-Are you feeling okay?

-Yeah, no, I just -- I'm...

I'm, like, dehydrated or... something.

Honestly, I've felt off, like, all day.

-It's been...

Yeah, it's been an emotional day.

-[Laughs] That's...

That's an understatement, yeah. [Chuckles]

Um...

I -- -So...

-No, did you... -No, what were you gonna say?

-You wanna? -No, what were you gonna say?

-You sure? -Yeah, no, go.

-Yeah, okay, I was...

you know, I was hanging out with Matt by the pool,

and we were -- we were talking.

-Oh, my gosh, were you guys talking about work?

-In a very -- yeah, like, in a roundabout way.

-Jack! That's incredible.

You working with Matt, and me working with Cat.

This is... This is really exciting.

Like, this could actually happen.

This -- This could be our life.

Right?

-Look, this -- this isn't real, though.

-Okay, Jack, this is the thing, though.

This is the thing that you do

when you are not accepting an invitation to upgrade

because you're scared to take a leap.

-I don't know what you're talking about right now.

-I just...

wanna do it my way for once.

-Um, taking money from a stranger

isn't doing it your way.

-She's not a stranger.

I'm kind of offended that you think it's taking money.

She's investing in me.

She believes in me.

Could you try maybe taking a note from Cat?

Maybe a, "Hey, Lindsay, you're really talented.

Hey, I would love to support you.

Hey, I think you're worth it.

Hey, this could be really good for us."

No? Okay. Okay.

-Lindsay? -No, it's fine.

-Lindsay? Lindsay?

I love you. We don't know them.

And you don't know how to run a business,

so getting into business with these people,

it's like -- that's a terrible idea.

You are not...

physically, mentally,

and emotionally capable of running a business.

I'm not either, so, like, taking money from someone --

-Hey, Jack?

Please stop.

-[Sighs]

[Door opening]

-Dinner's almost ready.

-Great, thank you. -Great.

You guys doing good?

You look great.

-Thanks, see you at dinner. -Okay.

Okay, I wasn't listening.

-[Chuckles] No, but the really fucked-up thing is,

do you know how much I paid Dan this year?

Like, $250,000. -He takes money from you?

-And that's on top of his salary.

That's not the salary.

-[Sighs]

-Milton's asked that we all meet down at the barn

for the weekend finale.

But, hey -- hey, hey! [Chuckles]

But first I just want to quickly express again

my deep and sincere appreciation

to each and every one of you for opening yourselves up to...

-Blah-blah-blah-blah... -...to each other.

-Let's get weird! -Let's get it!

[Cheering]

-Fuck it, let's get weird, Kerry.

-Let's fucking get weird. -Let's do this.

[Droning synths playing]

♪

♪

[Cheering]

Everybody put your fucking headphones on!

-Headphones on! Headphones!

[Up-tempo synth music]

♪

♪

-Why do you look so bored?

-Ugh, I'm not bored, I'm just...

-Drink.

-I can't drink champagne right now.

-Just have a glass of champagne.

-I don't wanna drink champagne right now.

-Please, just one. It'll be the best night ever.

-I'm sorry, I just -- I'm so mad at Jack right now.

-If you don't have one glass of champagne,

I will literally kill myself.

I swear to God, I will jump right out of that window

like the Kool-Aid Man. -[Chuckles]

I will eat an entire box of Tide Pods.

I will drink an entire bottle of bleach.

Daniel, hit me with the bleach!

-It's happening.

-I will drink a sip.

-Good girl.

That a baby!

Let's show these fuckers how to dance!

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

-[Giggles]

-Hi. -Hey.

-Could I get a water? -Yeah!

-Take those headphones off. -Oh! [Laughs]

[Music stops] Can I get a water? [Laughs]

-Yeah. -There you go.

-Wow, you are flying.

-Mmm.

Mmm.

-You guys are really feeling it already.

-Yeah. [Giggles] -They wanted us to break

the pills in half, but they were just...

too hard, so we just plopped them right in.

-What?

-The pills. -In the champagne.

-Yeah, double-stack Cadillacs.

-[Whooshing] -Wow!

[Both laugh]

-[Indistinct] -Oh, shit.

-Uh-oh. Okay.

-Hey. -Hey.

Hi, hi...

-[Exhales sharply] That is wild.

-Uh-huh. Hey, can I talk --

can I talk to you for a second? -Yeah, let's --

Let's connect.

-Okay. -You are so soft.

-Oh, thank you. -Your skin is so soft.

We don't touch enough.

-I know. -We used to touch more.

-I love you too. -I love you so much.

-I love you so much. -I love you.

-I feel amazing right now. -Hey, Jack?

Yes, Lindsay. -I know.

-I feel amazing, I love -- -Listen to me.

-Yeah. -That's because we're on molly.

-What? -It was in the champagne.

We were also on mushrooms all day.

-What?! -Yeah, it was in the cacao.

-The chocolate? -Uh-huh.

And a couple of other things.

-Okay, okay, okay. -Just breathe.

-I can't do drugs. -No, I think it's a little

too late, though. -[Sighs]

These people drugged us?

Fuck them! Fuck them so fucking hard!

-Fuck you! -Jack!

I need you to calm down, okay?

You need to breathe. -Okay.

-I see the dragon coming.

And I want you to stay with me, and I want you to look in me,

in my eyes. -[Breathing deeply]

-Okay?

I told her that you can't do drugs.

-I can't do drugs.

-And it's okay because Cat has a guy.

-Cat has a guy. -Yeah. Well, I mean,

it's not Cat's guy, it's -- Gigi has a guy.

And there's something about Elon.

-Elon? -Yeah.

It's okay because she has a podcast --

-A pod-- what the fuck are you talking about

right now? -No, listen to me, I'm just --

These people do this, it's like, it happens in little doses,

and listen, I just need everything to be cool because --

-Well, I can't be cool right now, Lindsay,

I'm on drugs, I can't be cool right now!

-Okay, please -- please stop yelling.

You're making a scene.

-I'm sorry that I'm making a scene

in front of these fucking people

who are trying to ruin our lives.

-Oh, my God. -These fucking people

you've known for 10 fucking days!

-These people? These people?

Jack, Jesus Christ, are you even listening to yourself?

You just keep repeating yourself,

over and over and over again!

You keep saying the same stupid shit,

and you keep wearing the same stupid shit,

and you keep watching the same stupid shit,

and you keep being this...

shitty version of yourself,

and I keep waiting for you to change,

and you're not changing, and I just --

I understand that you fell down, and I just need you --

I need you to get back up, okay?

And I know that you blame me. -I don't blame you...

-You do. -I don't blame you.

-Listen to me. -I don't blame you.

-I understand that you're angry,

but I need you to get back up.

Because this person believes in me.

-Cat believes in you? -Yes.

-I don't believe in you, but Cat believes in you?

We're here because your friend Cat

believes in you? Yeah?

-Yes, Jack! She is my friend.

Why else would we be here?

-Because they're fucking rich, Lindsay.

That's it.

They beckoned. We fucking came, okay?

And your friend Cat?

You just wanna be her.

She fucking sucks.

She's mean, and she's manipulative,

and she's a fucking bully,

and these people -- they're not your friends.

Alright? We are entertainment to them.

They think the way we live our life is funny.

They think the way I dress is fucking funny.

Okay?

I understand that I am not giving you

what you want in life, and I'm sorry, but, like,

this isn't us. -[Sighs]

-We are not gonna have this life ever.

-Well, then maybe I don't want our life anymore.

-No, no, no.

What does that mean?

-I don't know.

-No, I love you. These people don't love you.

I love you. I love you.

-Jack. -I love you.

-Look at me, I love you. -I hear you.

But you were just yelling at me.

[Voice breaks] And I'm going outside.

-Lindsay.

-Savage, bro.

-Fuck you, Kerry.

-That's fair.

[Chuckles]

-♪ Happy birthday to me

[Guitar strumming]

-Oh, my God.

Oh, my God. I am so sorry.

I am so embarrassed.

I am mortified, Jack just...

-Oh, Lindz, Lindsay -- -I can't believe

he said those things. -I -- honestly, I loved it.

I loved it! -What?

-Nobody ever has the balls to talk to me like that.

[Chuckles] Like, we pay them too much.

Even Matt is terrified of me, which I love.

But it also makes me sad.

But, like, I'm not the only one who's sad

and fucked up, you know?

Like, I -- yeah, I'm an alcoholic.

My husband's a workaholic.

Your husband is insecure.

You lack purpose.

But so do I, that's...

that's why I'm an alcoholic.

It gives me something to do. -No.

-We're like a clown car on the way to a Chris Gaines concert.

-No. -Look at us.

-No -- no!

It's like, God, I just...

I just wanted not to be us for, like, a minute.

Do you know what I mean? -How'd that go?

[Sighs]

-My husband's rolling his face off,

and he just screamed at me.

-I saw that. [Chuckles]

I loved that.

For me -- not -- I didn't love that for you.

That must have been really embarrassing.

-Yeah. -Gosh.

-It was.

-I'm...

I'm trying to work on my empathy.

Did I pass the test?

Hey, sorry that you thought that I had an answer or something --

somehow the missing piece in your heart.

Most of me is missing, to be honest.

It doesn't make any sense

'cause I have everything that I ever wanted,

and I'm...

not happy.

I have a hot husband, and I have two beautiful children,

and I have...

12 properties.

Money doesn't fix your problems, babe.

It just makes them prettier.

Oh! Okay.

Should I write a book?

Should I be a poet?

Should we smash John Mayer's guitar, um --

-That's John Mayer's guitar? -Yes!

It's John Mayer's guitar.

He left it here, and he clearly didn't want it.

-Oh, my God!

Oh, God! Stop!

Stop! -[Chuckles]

Whoo!

-What the fuck are you doing?

-Um, living?

Let me live, okay?

Should I call Milton and have him bring us some snacks?

We're having fun.

Milton!

-I'm going to bed.

-Bye.

Milton!

[Soft guitar music playing]

-♪ Go off to sleep in the sunshine ♪

♪ I don't want to see the day when it's dying ♪

♪ She's a sight to see

-♪ Sight to see

-♪ She's good to me

-♪ Good to me

-♪ But I'm already somebody's baby ♪

-♪ She's a pretty thing

-♪ A pretty thing

-♪ And she knows everything

-♪ Everything

-♪ But I'm already somebody's baby ♪

♪ You don't deserve to be lonely ♪

♪ But those drugs you got won't make you feel better ♪

-[Sighs]

-♪ Pretty soon you'll find it's the only ♪

♪ Little part of your life you're keeping together ♪

♪ I'm nice to you

-♪ Nice to you

-♪ I could make it through

-♪ Make it through

-♪ But you're already somebody's baby... ♪

-I'm sorry.

I'm really -- I'm just really sorry.

-Jack, stop.

I'm really...

...unhappy.

-I know, and I'm really...

I'm really sorry, and I...

-It's not your fault.

It's nobody's fault.

[Sighs]

-I'm really fucking intimidated by these people.

-I don't want to be these people.

[Whispering] I love you.

-I'm sorry.

[Sniffles]

-Please forgive me.

-You're such a fucking dick.

[Both laugh]

-Take a sip of the cacao.

-Daniel!

-My God, can we please get the fuck out of here?

-Yes, yes. -Okay.

-Get your shit, go!

[Up-tempo music playing]

♪

♪

There's still no service.

-We'll figure it out.

[Soft guitar music playing]

♪

-We'll figure it out.

♪

[Up-tempo music playing]

♪

♪

-You know what? I'm gonna throw in an extra case for you guys.

-Hey. -Thank you.

-Yeah, just because I feel

like we're connecting on a wine level.

You know, 'cause I see people's wine spirits.

-Which one am I? -Oh...

[Inhales sharply]

-[Chuckles] -The joy.

The joy, it kind of says to me, just, like, viognier.

-You know what I mean? -Yeah, Kerry's

kind of effervescent. -Thank you.

-Effervescent's kind of a strong word for viognier.

[Laughs] You know, okay? But that's --

that's just really between us wine people.

-♪ For the first time, baby

♪ I'm broke and I don't give a fuck ♪

♪ A-Alright

♪ A-A-Alright

♪ A-A-Alright

♪ I'm alive for the first time, baby ♪

♪ For the first time, baby

♪ I'm broke and I don't give a fuck ♪

♪

♪ I don't give a fuck

♪

♪ I'm broke and I don't give a fuck ♪

♪ I feel like it's alright that ♪

♪ I feel like I'm alive for the first time, baby ♪

♪ For the first time, baby

♪ I'm broke and I don't give a