All language subtitles for Episode Season 1-5

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:04,162 WWW.MY-SUBS.CO 1 00:00:01,664 --> 00:00:04,904 Why was that Martin bloke giving you all those boards? 2 00:00:04,977 --> 00:00:06,677 T-Mac boards are sponsoring me. 3 00:00:06,757 --> 00:00:07,997 Bullshit! 4 00:00:08,177 --> 00:00:10,157 Roger! This is Celia. 5 00:00:10,257 --> 00:00:11,557 Hello. Nice to meet you. 6 00:00:11,677 --> 00:00:13,277 Celia's bringing a mate. 7 00:00:13,457 --> 00:00:16,397 I know what you're doing, mate. Look, I don't root around. 8 00:00:16,537 --> 00:00:18,317 I love Celia. 9 00:00:18,397 --> 00:00:20,277 It's not just sex for me. 10 00:00:21,637 --> 00:00:23,197 Dad! 11 00:00:23,377 --> 00:00:27,277 I found something this morning and it made me think of you. 12 00:00:27,457 --> 00:00:29,757 I thought you could eat your first lobster. 13 00:00:29,937 --> 00:00:32,317 Where have you been? Petrol. 14 00:00:32,457 --> 00:00:34,637 What about the lobster? What lobster? 15 00:00:34,757 --> 00:00:36,557 The one dad caught this morning. 16 00:00:37,637 --> 00:00:39,237 Get your dacks off. 17 00:00:40,277 --> 00:00:41,557 You're dropped. 18 00:00:41,697 --> 00:00:44,197 If he can't root you, you know, what's the point? 19 00:00:44,297 --> 00:00:46,077 I just got dropped. 20 00:00:46,177 --> 00:00:47,277 I think I did too. 21 00:00:47,377 --> 00:00:48,357 Really? 22 00:00:48,457 --> 00:00:49,877 Really. 23 00:00:49,957 --> 00:00:51,997 Get out! Get out! 24 00:00:52,137 --> 00:00:54,237 Mum, don't have a spaz. 25 00:00:55,517 --> 00:00:57,397 I'm a bit tipsy. 26 00:00:57,517 --> 00:00:59,037 Oh, dearie, dearie me. 27 00:00:59,157 --> 00:01:00,517 I love whales. 28 00:01:00,597 --> 00:01:02,077 Me too. 29 00:01:54,837 --> 00:01:56,597 Can't believe you've read that book. 30 00:01:56,737 --> 00:01:59,197 Are you kidding? I love that book. 31 00:01:59,297 --> 00:02:01,157 I like his name too. 32 00:02:01,237 --> 00:02:03,757 Kurt Vonnegut. 33 00:02:08,277 --> 00:02:10,717 Imagine living all those different lives. 34 00:02:10,797 --> 00:02:12,477 Be unreal. 35 00:02:14,557 --> 00:02:16,277 You wouldn't be able to eat pluto pups. 36 00:02:16,377 --> 00:02:17,757 Devastating. 37 00:02:18,877 --> 00:02:20,637 They say there's one and a half rats 38 00:02:20,737 --> 00:02:22,077 in every pluto pup. 39 00:02:22,157 --> 00:02:24,197 Don't make me spew! 40 00:02:24,297 --> 00:02:25,557 Boys! 41 00:02:27,494 --> 00:02:28,657 See ya. 42 00:02:29,987 --> 00:02:31,270 Gary ... ciggies! 43 00:02:31,370 --> 00:02:32,870 Oh, you can keep 'em. 44 00:02:34,517 --> 00:02:36,597 I think my lips are bruised. 45 00:02:36,737 --> 00:02:38,677 And my nipple. 46 00:02:40,757 --> 00:02:42,317 Did Gary pash you? 47 00:02:42,457 --> 00:02:44,277 What? 48 00:02:44,377 --> 00:02:46,237 I was giving you time alone! 49 00:02:46,377 --> 00:02:51,637 Sorry. We just... sat and... talked. 50 00:02:51,777 --> 00:02:54,637 He looks at you like he thinks you're unreal. 51 00:02:54,737 --> 00:02:56,997 Mmm, it's killing me! 52 00:02:57,137 --> 00:02:58,957 - What if he heard? - Heard what? 53 00:03:00,917 --> 00:03:03,877 That I'm... tight. 54 00:03:03,997 --> 00:03:05,557 Shit. 55 00:03:06,837 --> 00:03:08,697 Do boys even talk about that stuff? 56 00:03:10,997 --> 00:03:13,357 Oi, Debbie. 57 00:03:13,437 --> 00:03:15,177 I'm gonna stay at yours tonight. 58 00:03:16,837 --> 00:03:18,437 My mum's a slappy bitch. 59 00:03:18,517 --> 00:03:21,637 My... my house? 60 00:03:21,737 --> 00:03:23,257 Yeah. 61 00:03:36,837 --> 00:03:38,237 It's tripe. 62 00:03:39,837 --> 00:03:41,277 Offal. 63 00:03:41,377 --> 00:03:43,317 What the heck is offal? 64 00:03:43,437 --> 00:03:45,597 How'd you make it look like that? 65 00:03:45,737 --> 00:03:47,057 It's pig's stomach. 66 00:03:53,017 --> 00:03:54,677 Cheryl, stop that. 67 00:03:55,957 --> 00:03:57,637 Cheryl, stop that. 68 00:03:59,117 --> 00:04:00,677 Eww. 69 00:04:00,857 --> 00:04:04,517 OK, who wants to go first? Best thing about your day. Debbie? 70 00:04:04,657 --> 00:04:06,157 Do we have to do this tonight, Mum? 71 00:04:06,297 --> 00:04:08,757 I think you know the answer to that question. 72 00:04:08,877 --> 00:04:10,597 When's Bruce coming round again? 73 00:04:10,777 --> 00:04:13,037 He said he'd take me for a drive in his van. 74 00:04:14,757 --> 00:04:15,797 They broke up. 75 00:04:15,877 --> 00:04:17,917 Really? That's great! 76 00:04:18,017 --> 00:04:19,297 Judy! 77 00:04:22,437 --> 00:04:23,957 Why did you break up? 78 00:04:24,137 --> 00:04:27,257 - What? - Yeah, Deb, why'd you break up? 79 00:04:34,317 --> 00:04:36,357 We... 80 00:04:37,717 --> 00:04:38,777 broke up because... 81 00:04:38,877 --> 00:04:40,597 Sometimes people just don't fit. 82 00:04:57,037 --> 00:04:59,197 Danny. 83 00:05:01,957 --> 00:05:03,557 - Danny. - Huh? 84 00:05:03,657 --> 00:05:05,377 My parents are home. 85 00:05:11,317 --> 00:05:13,717 - Cup of tea? - Scotch and milk? 86 00:05:33,437 --> 00:05:35,237 Wait here a minute, my love. 87 00:05:53,517 --> 00:05:55,517 Hey. Hey, does Gary like Debbie? 88 00:05:57,457 --> 00:05:59,517 She thinks he's unreal. Can you ask him for me? 89 00:05:59,657 --> 00:06:01,157 Yeah, sure. 90 00:06:04,357 --> 00:06:05,757 Check on Sue? 91 00:06:05,877 --> 00:06:07,957 She's all tucked in, sound asleep. 92 00:06:13,357 --> 00:06:15,077 What are you doing? 93 00:06:15,217 --> 00:06:18,797 I've never seen anything as beautiful in the whole wide world 94 00:06:18,877 --> 00:06:20,317 as your bum. 95 00:06:23,517 --> 00:06:24,877 What? 96 00:06:28,157 --> 00:06:29,557 Do that again. 97 00:06:29,697 --> 00:06:32,417 - Do what again? - Pick something else up. 98 00:06:38,077 --> 00:06:40,177 - How's that? - Oh, that's exciting! 99 00:06:42,037 --> 00:06:44,677 Oh, my sweetheart. 100 00:06:44,837 --> 00:06:48,397 Like an African. Shake it around. 101 00:06:48,557 --> 00:06:49,877 - The Rivers of... - Whoo! 102 00:06:50,057 --> 00:06:51,337 The Rivers of Babylon. 103 00:06:55,037 --> 00:06:57,417 Sleep tight. Sweet dreams. 104 00:06:57,517 --> 00:06:58,917 Goodnight. 105 00:07:01,677 --> 00:07:03,957 Do you need to say your prayers before you go to sleep? 106 00:07:04,077 --> 00:07:05,697 Shut up. 107 00:07:12,437 --> 00:07:14,557 Your family are spastics. 108 00:07:21,897 --> 00:07:23,277 What are you doing? 109 00:07:23,417 --> 00:07:26,317 I'm keeping next-door's rabbits off them. 110 00:07:26,437 --> 00:07:28,997 Cheeky buggers. 111 00:07:35,317 --> 00:07:37,597 I want us to go to Couples Encounters. 112 00:07:37,717 --> 00:07:39,197 What? 113 00:07:39,297 --> 00:07:41,157 It's a marriage counselling service. 114 00:07:42,517 --> 00:07:43,997 They say it's very good. 115 00:07:44,137 --> 00:07:48,357 I'm not talking to some stranger about personal things. 116 00:07:48,437 --> 00:07:51,117 Well, then talk to me about them. 117 00:08:00,397 --> 00:08:03,197 - Lynette? - Hi, Judy. Sorry it's late. 118 00:08:03,337 --> 00:08:04,797 I'm just looking for Cheryl. Is she here? 119 00:08:04,977 --> 00:08:06,877 - Yes, the girls are in bed. - So she is here. 120 00:08:07,017 --> 00:08:08,597 OK, good. That's a relief. 121 00:08:08,777 --> 00:08:11,717 - Oh, you didn't know where she was? - No. Cheryl's got the shits with me. 122 00:08:11,897 --> 00:08:14,717 When she's got the shits, she can be a lying little Gemini bitch. 123 00:08:14,857 --> 00:08:16,517 Uh... 124 00:08:20,757 --> 00:08:24,477 Any time you need to talk to someone, I am always here. 125 00:08:24,577 --> 00:08:26,617 You go and have a shower. 126 00:08:26,717 --> 00:08:27,897 OK. 127 00:08:29,677 --> 00:08:31,317 Thanks, Mrs Vickers. 128 00:08:37,717 --> 00:08:40,037 Cheryl's gonna stay for a few days. 129 00:08:40,157 --> 00:08:41,277 Mum, are you sure? 130 00:08:41,417 --> 00:08:43,997 She's got some trouble at home with her mum. 131 00:08:45,317 --> 00:08:48,237 We're lucky, you and I, Deb. 132 00:08:48,417 --> 00:08:51,877 Apparently there was some party that was out of control. 133 00:08:51,997 --> 00:08:54,597 Oh, I did hear about that. 134 00:08:54,777 --> 00:08:58,037 Not a party. A small gathering, I think it was. 135 00:08:58,157 --> 00:08:59,997 Maybe one of the boys was drunk. 136 00:09:00,137 --> 00:09:02,557 - You weren't there? - No. 137 00:09:04,117 --> 00:09:05,757 We should have a party! 138 00:09:05,897 --> 00:09:07,157 Better get ready for school. 139 00:09:07,337 --> 00:09:09,877 - For who? - For Cheryl. 140 00:09:21,777 --> 00:09:25,037 Oh, yeah. You can root Debbie if you want. 141 00:09:27,397 --> 00:09:29,557 Yeah, Sue told me. 142 00:09:32,557 --> 00:09:34,757 Right! 143 00:09:38,677 --> 00:09:39,877 - Do you want some cake? - Thank you. 144 00:09:39,997 --> 00:09:40,917 You're welcome. 145 00:09:47,677 --> 00:09:49,097 Where's your hat? 146 00:09:50,597 --> 00:09:53,597 I don't like, um... 147 00:09:53,717 --> 00:09:54,957 Fun? 148 00:09:56,537 --> 00:09:58,797 Yes. Fun. Not my thing. 149 00:09:58,977 --> 00:10:01,917 I don't think that's true. Wear the hat. 150 00:10:02,057 --> 00:10:04,997 - I... - Wear the hat. 151 00:10:05,137 --> 00:10:06,877 - Annie, I... - Wear the hat. 152 00:10:15,837 --> 00:10:17,697 Now put this in your mouth and blow. 153 00:10:17,797 --> 00:10:19,457 You do know how to blow, don't you? 154 00:10:19,557 --> 00:10:21,537 Lauren Bacall? 155 00:10:21,637 --> 00:10:24,037 But I think she said 'whistle'. 156 00:10:26,437 --> 00:10:29,157 See? Now we're having fun. 157 00:10:30,237 --> 00:10:32,157 Cheers. 158 00:10:47,177 --> 00:10:48,597 I'm on my rags. 159 00:10:51,177 --> 00:10:52,697 Oh. 160 00:10:52,797 --> 00:10:54,477 OK. Jesus. 161 00:10:56,937 --> 00:10:59,237 Sorry, I... 162 00:10:59,357 --> 00:11:01,697 I thought we were... 163 00:11:01,797 --> 00:11:03,837 Sue said that Danny said that... 164 00:11:03,937 --> 00:11:05,797 We haven't even kissed yet. 165 00:11:11,677 --> 00:11:14,237 So, does that mean you wanna kiss me? 166 00:11:15,357 --> 00:11:17,197 Of course. 167 00:11:17,297 --> 00:11:19,677 Why haven't you? 168 00:11:21,397 --> 00:11:24,717 We always start talking and then we don't stop, 169 00:11:24,857 --> 00:11:26,197 and I always forget to do it... 170 00:11:27,917 --> 00:11:30,037 and then regret it later. 171 00:11:30,137 --> 00:11:32,517 Yeah, me too. 172 00:11:37,217 --> 00:11:39,117 So... 173 00:11:39,217 --> 00:11:41,997 So... 174 00:11:42,077 --> 00:11:43,757 So, do we... do we just... 175 00:11:43,897 --> 00:11:47,977 Just be quiet for 10 seconds and we'll see what happens! 176 00:11:48,137 --> 00:11:49,957 OK. 177 00:12:43,542 --> 00:12:47,122 Step and touch and step and touch... 178 00:12:48,842 --> 00:12:50,242 Debbie? 179 00:12:50,285 --> 00:12:52,905 This may be the happiest day of my life. 180 00:12:53,000 --> 00:12:54,520 The kiss sounded like a dream. 181 00:12:54,640 --> 00:12:57,160 He is perfect. 182 00:12:57,280 --> 00:12:59,240 He will be if he has a small dick. 183 00:12:59,340 --> 00:13:00,720 Yeah, wouldn't that be great? 184 00:13:00,900 --> 00:13:03,200 - Size of a cocktail frankfurt. - Ideally. 185 00:13:04,820 --> 00:13:07,240 You're so smart, telling him you're on your rags. 186 00:13:07,380 --> 00:13:09,080 - I might try it with Danny. - Yeah, I know. 187 00:13:09,260 --> 00:13:11,640 I suddenly realised they just have to take our word for it. 188 00:13:11,780 --> 00:13:13,120 It's what's known as a loophole. 189 00:13:13,200 --> 00:13:15,680 Closed hole, you mean! 190 00:13:18,560 --> 00:13:20,600 I'd love to know what they're talking about. 191 00:13:20,740 --> 00:13:23,320 Look at them. You can tell they're up to something. 192 00:13:23,460 --> 00:13:26,280 Oh, I don't think so. They're just having fun. 193 00:13:26,400 --> 00:13:28,640 Sue had a drink the other night. 194 00:13:28,760 --> 00:13:30,600 Oh, yeah. Admitted it to us. 195 00:13:30,680 --> 00:13:33,100 She told you she was drinking? 196 00:13:33,200 --> 00:13:36,160 Just a UDL. A mixer. 197 00:13:36,280 --> 00:13:38,200 And she told us they've kissed boys. 198 00:13:38,280 --> 00:13:40,820 Debbie broke up with Bruce Board. 199 00:13:42,420 --> 00:13:45,600 Yeah, I guess she kissed Bruce. That just makes me feel ill. 200 00:13:45,700 --> 00:13:49,120 When did you first kiss a boy, Jude? 201 00:13:49,260 --> 00:13:52,160 Oh, I was certainly older than our girls! 202 00:13:52,340 --> 00:13:55,040 - I certainly wasn't. - I can testify to that. 203 00:13:57,340 --> 00:14:01,560 Debbie's smart. We're very close. She tells me everything. 204 00:14:01,700 --> 00:14:03,960 She didn't tell us about breaking up with Bruce. 205 00:14:04,100 --> 00:14:06,040 Yeah, well, I think it's just the start. 206 00:14:06,140 --> 00:14:08,840 Oh, they're gonna have so much fun. 207 00:14:10,020 --> 00:14:12,380 Well, I'm sorry Sue's drinking, Pam. 208 00:14:19,020 --> 00:14:21,440 That shelf has a slight tilt to it. 209 00:14:21,620 --> 00:14:24,640 I'm afraid the next time I put something on it 210 00:14:24,820 --> 00:14:27,540 it's just gonna slide down and smash on the ground. 211 00:14:27,640 --> 00:14:29,680 Imagine that! 212 00:14:29,780 --> 00:14:32,680 Well, I'll call someone. 213 00:14:32,820 --> 00:14:35,520 Well, why don't you take a look at it first? 214 00:14:35,640 --> 00:14:38,460 Maybe all it needs is a man's touch. 215 00:14:38,560 --> 00:14:41,520 It's no problem, really. 216 00:14:41,680 --> 00:14:45,360 I have favours owed to me all over the Shire, so... 217 00:14:48,280 --> 00:14:49,640 I'll get it. 218 00:15:00,920 --> 00:15:02,440 Ferris Hennessey. 219 00:15:03,640 --> 00:15:05,040 Hey. 220 00:15:08,420 --> 00:15:10,800 Well, because I'm at home and I can't talk. 221 00:15:12,560 --> 00:15:13,940 No, wait, wait. Wait. Just... 222 00:15:15,560 --> 00:15:17,020 What's wrong? Has something happened? 223 00:15:17,160 --> 00:15:20,140 Calm down. Have you been drinking? 224 00:15:20,240 --> 00:15:25,040 Sweetheart... you don't mean that. 225 00:15:31,360 --> 00:15:35,200 You just... just tell me what you want me to do 226 00:15:35,280 --> 00:15:36,920 and I'll... I'll do it. 227 00:15:37,100 --> 00:15:38,960 I can take a look at it for you, Mum. 228 00:15:39,060 --> 00:15:40,880 Sorry, darling? 229 00:15:41,020 --> 00:15:43,120 The shelf. I can take a look at it for you. 230 00:15:48,960 --> 00:15:52,120 No. 231 00:15:52,200 --> 00:15:53,720 Stop saying that! 232 00:15:53,900 --> 00:15:56,160 Oh... fuck! 233 00:17:20,340 --> 00:17:21,840 They're so cute! 234 00:17:21,980 --> 00:17:25,120 They've been practising so hard they've got blisters. 235 00:17:42,260 --> 00:17:43,960 Heard you're with Gary. 236 00:17:44,100 --> 00:17:46,240 I'm not trying to be a bitch or anything, 237 00:17:46,380 --> 00:17:47,840 but I'm glad he's not my boyfriend anymore. 238 00:17:47,920 --> 00:17:49,120 He's bent. 239 00:17:49,260 --> 00:17:52,360 Yeah, rooting Matty was the best thing you ever did. 240 00:17:52,480 --> 00:17:53,840 You know, Gary's sponsored. 241 00:17:53,980 --> 00:17:56,960 He made me swear not to say anything. 242 00:17:57,100 --> 00:17:59,120 - He doesn't want anyone to know. - Why not? 243 00:17:59,260 --> 00:18:02,960 I don't know. Some shit he was talking about. He's a weirdo. 244 00:18:03,060 --> 00:18:04,040 Go, you two! 245 00:18:26,660 --> 00:18:28,400 - Oh... - Oh, no. 246 00:18:28,540 --> 00:18:31,100 Deb! 247 00:18:36,560 --> 00:18:37,760 Debbie, there's blood. 248 00:19:11,271 --> 00:19:12,631 You alright? 249 00:19:17,617 --> 00:19:22,177 That was probably the most mortifying experience of my entire young life. 250 00:19:26,097 --> 00:19:29,577 If it helps, up until then, you were brilliant. 251 00:19:29,733 --> 00:19:30,973 It doesn't! 252 00:19:35,073 --> 00:19:36,973 How do I face everyone? 253 00:19:37,133 --> 00:19:40,353 You'll be alright, because you're you, 254 00:19:40,433 --> 00:19:42,873 an exceptional person. 255 00:19:43,053 --> 00:19:47,113 And you always have been. 256 00:19:54,233 --> 00:19:55,753 Who's Gary? 257 00:19:57,193 --> 00:19:59,473 I heard you girls talking. 258 00:20:06,673 --> 00:20:08,133 Gary Hennessey. 259 00:20:10,613 --> 00:20:12,173 Mum, he's... 260 00:20:12,273 --> 00:20:13,733 He's so... 261 00:20:15,433 --> 00:20:16,673 lovely. 262 00:20:19,513 --> 00:20:21,773 He kissed me and it was... 263 00:20:21,873 --> 00:20:23,353 wow. 264 00:20:25,433 --> 00:20:27,353 And it was wow, huh? 265 00:20:27,433 --> 00:20:30,873 Oh! 266 00:20:32,713 --> 00:20:34,553 Thank you for telling me. 267 00:20:43,793 --> 00:20:45,833 David, can you please take those pyjama pants off? 268 00:20:45,933 --> 00:20:47,233 They've got wee on them. 269 00:20:47,373 --> 00:20:49,473 I assure you it's water. 270 00:20:49,613 --> 00:20:52,033 And next time you wet the bed, please tell me. 271 00:20:52,153 --> 00:20:54,193 I'm sick of finding nasty surprises. 272 00:21:01,633 --> 00:21:04,313 Oi. You and Gary. 273 00:21:07,853 --> 00:21:10,393 Get lost. 274 00:21:10,573 --> 00:21:13,233 And, girls, straight to bed tonight and lights out, OK? 275 00:21:13,373 --> 00:21:15,073 Goodnight, Mrs Vickers. 276 00:21:15,213 --> 00:21:17,593 I'll be in to give you a kiss goodnight. 277 00:21:22,673 --> 00:21:24,113 Gary's not like that. 278 00:21:24,213 --> 00:21:26,613 They're all like that. 279 00:21:35,433 --> 00:21:37,513 Is that Ferris? 280 00:21:47,673 --> 00:21:49,513 Wait a sec. 281 00:22:15,313 --> 00:22:16,753 What's wrong with him? 282 00:22:20,073 --> 00:22:23,033 Ferris is, um... 283 00:22:24,653 --> 00:22:26,693 Roger Knight, are you about to lie to me? 284 00:22:32,253 --> 00:22:34,633 Ferris has a friend. 285 00:22:34,773 --> 00:22:39,193 And she's just told him that she no longer wants to be his friend. 286 00:22:40,273 --> 00:22:42,173 Ah. 287 00:22:43,633 --> 00:22:45,113 How old is this friend? 288 00:22:45,213 --> 00:22:47,713 Much younger than his other friends. 289 00:22:48,953 --> 00:22:52,513 Hang on... So, why did he come to you? Do you know her? 290 00:22:54,093 --> 00:22:56,073 - I had lunch with them. - Them together? 291 00:22:56,213 --> 00:22:58,813 - Oh, Rog! - I'm sorry. 292 00:23:07,893 --> 00:23:09,273 Do you have a friend too? 293 00:23:09,373 --> 00:23:11,673 He asked me to lunch. 294 00:23:11,793 --> 00:23:14,713 His friend was there... 295 00:23:14,793 --> 00:23:16,993 with her friend. 296 00:23:17,133 --> 00:23:20,353 I told Ferris I didn't need a friend 297 00:23:20,493 --> 00:23:23,833 'cause I was still friendly with my wife. 298 00:23:29,153 --> 00:23:31,793 Well, that may not continue if you lie to me again. 299 00:23:35,193 --> 00:23:37,313 Well, that's understood. 300 00:24:07,553 --> 00:24:09,353 Do you really want to? 301 00:24:31,673 --> 00:24:33,073 Why's she ending it? 302 00:24:33,153 --> 00:24:35,973 'Cause she's 22. 303 00:24:38,113 --> 00:24:39,353 That's what she said? 304 00:24:41,673 --> 00:24:43,913 No. She said she can't keep fucking an old man. 305 00:24:46,073 --> 00:24:48,613 Shit, that's gotta hurt. 306 00:24:50,153 --> 00:24:52,313 I mean, I'm not an idiot. It's a good reason. 307 00:24:55,113 --> 00:24:57,353 You know, I just look in the mirror 308 00:24:57,493 --> 00:25:01,113 and all I see is this unrecognisable grumpy old bastard. 309 00:25:01,193 --> 00:25:04,313 I've got the same problem. 310 00:25:06,473 --> 00:25:08,433 I mean, I'm trapped in this old man body, 311 00:25:08,573 --> 00:25:09,993 and all I wanna do is... 312 00:25:10,133 --> 00:25:14,513 shout the whole fucking world down that it's not mine, and then... 313 00:25:14,693 --> 00:25:18,353 rip the heads off all the young fuckwits! 314 00:25:24,313 --> 00:25:27,753 They're touching all those young titties as much as they like. 315 00:25:29,933 --> 00:25:32,033 They don't know how good they've got it. 316 00:26:11,286 --> 00:26:12,666 Morning. 317 00:26:12,886 --> 00:26:15,286 You get up early too, Mr Vickers? 318 00:26:15,386 --> 00:26:18,006 Yes. I work every third Saturday. 319 00:26:22,406 --> 00:26:24,046 Is my nightie too short? 320 00:26:24,166 --> 00:26:26,686 No, I... 321 00:26:31,846 --> 00:26:33,246 How about now? 322 00:26:47,846 --> 00:26:50,226 It was hilarious! Come on. 323 00:26:50,346 --> 00:26:52,686 The blood! 324 00:26:56,386 --> 00:26:58,806 Oh, wait. Hold on, my thong's broken. Wait up. 325 00:26:58,966 --> 00:27:01,766 I don't wanna go to the beach. 326 00:27:01,926 --> 00:27:04,806 - We're going to the beach. - After last night? 327 00:27:04,926 --> 00:27:07,626 I can just hear it already. 328 00:27:07,766 --> 00:27:10,046 "Oh, look, sharks - they must smell Debbie. 329 00:27:10,166 --> 00:27:11,646 "Did someone get shot? 330 00:27:11,786 --> 00:27:14,266 "No, just Debbie Vickers wandering around, leaving a blood trail." 331 00:27:14,426 --> 00:27:16,806 Forget about those bitches. We can't show weakness. 332 00:27:16,946 --> 00:27:19,846 Sue! I really feel shit. 333 00:27:19,986 --> 00:27:22,526 We are women and we're not gonna apologise for it. 334 00:27:23,766 --> 00:27:26,806 - What? - I know. 335 00:27:26,946 --> 00:27:28,686 My mum always says it to my dad 336 00:27:28,866 --> 00:27:30,566 when he complains that we gossip too much. 337 00:27:30,706 --> 00:27:33,086 Come on! 338 00:27:33,166 --> 00:27:36,006 Gary'll be there. 339 00:27:43,266 --> 00:27:44,326 Lezzos! 340 00:27:53,086 --> 00:27:54,966 - Oh! - Hi. 341 00:27:55,086 --> 00:27:56,126 Hi. 342 00:27:57,446 --> 00:28:01,086 Look, I was just thinking that maybe you'd like one of these. 343 00:28:01,166 --> 00:28:03,326 Oh, thanks! 344 00:28:03,446 --> 00:28:05,286 I made it myself. 345 00:28:05,386 --> 00:28:09,386 Thank you! It's... it's... lovely. 346 00:28:11,166 --> 00:28:14,006 - So, how are you, anyway? - I'm fine, thanks. 347 00:28:14,086 --> 00:28:16,966 Good, good. Just that... 348 00:28:17,146 --> 00:28:20,086 I think Roger and Ferris had a few drinks last night. 349 00:28:20,166 --> 00:28:22,446 Uh, yes, they did, I think. 350 00:28:22,626 --> 00:28:25,366 Um, Ferris is a bit under the weather. 351 00:28:25,506 --> 00:28:27,266 Yeah. 352 00:28:27,426 --> 00:28:30,106 Oh, sometimes I get bloody annoyed with him, you know? 353 00:28:30,266 --> 00:28:31,406 - Roger. - Oh, yes. 354 00:28:31,546 --> 00:28:33,606 I mean, you gotta stand your ground, don't you? 355 00:28:33,726 --> 00:28:34,926 Yes. 356 00:28:35,066 --> 00:28:38,326 They can be bloody idiots, and you gotta take care of yourself. 357 00:28:38,506 --> 00:28:40,206 - You know? - Ye... yes. 358 00:28:40,306 --> 00:28:41,906 Um... 359 00:28:42,026 --> 00:28:43,886 They, um... 360 00:28:44,066 --> 00:28:48,546 We do love them, though... silly as they are. 361 00:28:50,726 --> 00:28:53,066 - Right. - Yeah. 362 00:28:54,366 --> 00:28:55,806 Well, look, I was gonna come in, 363 00:28:55,966 --> 00:28:59,046 but look, I think I'll just go and, um... 364 00:28:59,166 --> 00:29:01,406 see you at tennis. 365 00:29:04,666 --> 00:29:05,926 Yep. 366 00:29:06,066 --> 00:29:08,466 - OK. Bye-bye, then. - 'Bye! 367 00:29:13,686 --> 00:29:16,366 Debbie's. Debbie's house. 368 00:29:16,506 --> 00:29:19,286 - It's just a weird place. - Sounds freaky. 369 00:29:19,366 --> 00:29:20,766 Her little brother's cute. 370 00:29:20,906 --> 00:29:23,346 - There's a pie and a Polly Waffle. - Thanks. 371 00:29:23,506 --> 00:29:26,106 Probably wanking his little thing at me. 372 00:29:41,806 --> 00:29:43,986 Vicki reckons you're sponsored. 373 00:29:46,366 --> 00:29:47,766 Yeah. 374 00:29:47,866 --> 00:29:51,046 Why don't you want anyone to know? 375 00:29:51,146 --> 00:29:53,026 'Cause I don't. 376 00:29:57,846 --> 00:29:59,646 Well, what about me? 377 00:30:01,546 --> 00:30:03,086 Debbie, can you just stop? 378 00:30:05,806 --> 00:30:08,086 They eat the same thing every week. 379 00:30:08,266 --> 00:30:10,326 You can't have a drink until you've finished your meal. 380 00:30:10,506 --> 00:30:12,646 You can't leave the table until everybody's finished. 381 00:30:12,726 --> 00:30:15,126 They ate pig guts the other night. 382 00:30:15,226 --> 00:30:16,726 Mrs Vickers is a mean old bag. 383 00:30:16,866 --> 00:30:19,206 Monday is always lamb night, Tuesday is spag bol, 384 00:30:19,346 --> 00:30:21,886 Wednesday, pork chops, Thursday, chook. 385 00:30:22,066 --> 00:30:24,206 Friday is fish night. Then they go to the club... 386 00:30:26,646 --> 00:30:28,566 Can I borrow your board a sec? 387 00:30:28,646 --> 00:30:30,846 Then start all over again! 388 00:30:37,886 --> 00:30:41,266 - What are they doing? - You girls have bloody lost it! 389 00:30:41,366 --> 00:30:42,546 Darren. 390 00:30:42,646 --> 00:30:45,126 Control your females, you two. 391 00:30:45,246 --> 00:30:50,286 - Sue, ya dumb moll! - Debbie! Put my board down now! 392 00:30:50,366 --> 00:30:51,346 Dumb moll. 393 00:30:51,506 --> 00:30:53,766 Yeah, ya fat-faced molls. Put 'em down. 394 00:30:53,866 --> 00:30:55,606 Lezzos! 395 00:31:08,056 --> 00:31:09,076 It's called an enneagram, 396 00:31:09,236 --> 00:31:11,456 and you use it to categorise people into different types. 397 00:31:11,596 --> 00:31:14,136 I don't think you can categorise people. 398 00:31:14,316 --> 00:31:16,696 And yet you're happy to categorise fish. 399 00:31:16,836 --> 00:31:19,176 And yet aren't we all God's creatures? 400 00:31:19,316 --> 00:31:21,496 Isn't that just sheer arrogance, Martin Vickers? 401 00:31:23,416 --> 00:31:24,616 Sorry, God! 402 00:31:27,196 --> 00:31:28,856 So, what number are you? 403 00:31:28,976 --> 00:31:30,856 I'm a 2. 404 00:31:30,976 --> 00:31:33,656 And what number am I on this thing? 405 00:31:35,896 --> 00:31:37,656 Give me your hand. 406 00:31:41,336 --> 00:31:44,376 I think you're this. 407 00:31:54,096 --> 00:31:56,096 What's it mean? 408 00:31:56,236 --> 00:31:59,136 You're just gonna have to find out now, aren't you? 409 00:32:15,996 --> 00:32:18,176 Darling, you've been as busy as a bee, 410 00:32:18,316 --> 00:32:20,096 so I thought I'd make you a bloody Mary. 411 00:32:20,236 --> 00:32:23,376 I was having a snooze on the couch before 412 00:32:23,476 --> 00:32:25,736 and I'm in between sleep and awake 413 00:32:25,836 --> 00:32:27,576 and it hits me... 414 00:32:27,696 --> 00:32:28,936 bang. 415 00:32:30,656 --> 00:32:31,696 "Please do"? 416 00:32:34,576 --> 00:32:36,816 Your bum is my muse. 417 00:32:36,916 --> 00:32:39,136 It's like this peach. 418 00:32:40,556 --> 00:32:43,536 Well, I think you should ask my bum if that's alright. 419 00:32:47,256 --> 00:32:48,876 Well, I might just do that. 420 00:32:51,216 --> 00:32:53,136 If you don't mind. 421 00:32:58,456 --> 00:33:00,576 Oh, no, I don't mind. 422 00:33:04,556 --> 00:33:08,256 Hey, let's have a quickie before Sue gets home from the beach. 423 00:33:08,396 --> 00:33:10,456 - Alright. - I am home! 424 00:33:14,656 --> 00:33:17,156 Well, don't come in here for at least... 425 00:33:18,416 --> 00:33:20,056 seven minutes. 426 00:33:20,196 --> 00:33:21,456 You hear me? 427 00:33:59,636 --> 00:34:01,976 Do you wanna be in the gang or not? 428 00:34:02,056 --> 00:34:03,436 What's the big deal? 429 00:34:03,596 --> 00:34:07,236 Girls don't surf. You're lucky Gary didn't drop you on the spot. 430 00:34:07,396 --> 00:34:09,056 - I would if I was him. - Piss off. 431 00:34:11,016 --> 00:34:12,416 I'm just trying to help you. 432 00:34:16,816 --> 00:34:18,276 Stop looking at her! 433 00:34:23,656 --> 00:34:25,336 I want her out. 434 00:34:41,976 --> 00:34:43,496 You need to stop that at once. 435 00:34:48,596 --> 00:34:50,216 Better not be about that girl in there. 436 00:34:50,336 --> 00:34:52,096 Judy... 437 00:34:52,236 --> 00:34:54,876 What could you possibly say right now, Martin? 438 00:35:10,136 --> 00:35:11,936 Ah, f... 439 00:35:12,096 --> 00:35:13,956 Have you read the Dine labels? 440 00:35:14,056 --> 00:35:15,696 Each name says exactly what's in... 441 00:35:15,836 --> 00:35:18,336 Cheryl, put some clothes on. 442 00:35:18,476 --> 00:35:19,496 What for? 443 00:35:19,676 --> 00:35:23,056 Because that's how people sit in this house... 444 00:35:23,196 --> 00:35:25,816 fully dressed and wearing pants. 445 00:35:25,896 --> 00:35:28,156 These are pants. 446 00:35:28,256 --> 00:35:30,816 Not in my book. 447 00:35:33,736 --> 00:35:35,416 - Hi. - Hello, Lynette. 448 00:35:35,536 --> 00:35:37,416 They're sick of me. 449 00:35:37,576 --> 00:35:40,016 I just... It's time to come home, I think. 450 00:35:40,136 --> 00:35:42,876 Don't be shitty, chicken. I've been missing you like crazy. 451 00:35:44,416 --> 00:35:47,336 I know you've missed me. I can see it in your irises. 452 00:35:49,436 --> 00:35:52,076 And your palm says you wanna come home to your mummy. 453 00:35:52,236 --> 00:35:54,096 If you look closely, it says you're a dumb moll. 454 00:35:54,236 --> 00:35:56,336 - You're a dumb moll. - You are. 455 00:35:56,476 --> 00:35:57,816 You are. 456 00:35:57,896 --> 00:35:59,296 Thanks, Mrs Vickers. 457 00:35:59,436 --> 00:36:01,816 - Thank you. - Thanks. 458 00:36:07,836 --> 00:36:11,336 What were you and Cheryl fighting about in front of the TV? 459 00:36:12,776 --> 00:36:13,876 Make-up. 460 00:36:13,976 --> 00:36:16,696 How much is too much. 461 00:36:23,016 --> 00:36:24,936 'Night, sweetheart. 462 00:36:35,836 --> 00:36:38,816 Hey, mate. Let's go for a jog together. 463 00:36:38,896 --> 00:36:40,576 Um... 464 00:36:40,696 --> 00:36:43,076 Come on. It'll be fun. 465 00:36:46,256 --> 00:36:48,396 Come on, race ya! 466 00:37:09,336 --> 00:37:14,816 You know, when you were little, we'd run and you'd chase me 467 00:37:14,956 --> 00:37:17,816 and you'd cry 'cause you weren't fast enough. 468 00:37:20,976 --> 00:37:22,616 Guess it's my turn now, huh? 469 00:37:35,456 --> 00:37:37,416 You are so bloody lucky. 470 00:37:37,536 --> 00:37:39,776 Enjoy it, mate. 471 00:37:39,956 --> 00:37:42,456 'Cause as you get older, life just gets worse and worse. 472 00:37:44,376 --> 00:37:45,896 You should know that. 473 00:37:47,696 --> 00:37:50,176 Remember this, though. 474 00:37:50,256 --> 00:37:53,496 Anything you do, I've done before. 475 00:38:13,016 --> 00:38:14,796 Mum. 476 00:38:14,996 --> 00:38:18,496 "Dear Mum and Dad, I've gone north to relax and play golf. 477 00:38:18,616 --> 00:38:20,656 "Don't worry about me. David. 478 00:38:22,016 --> 00:38:24,856 "P.S. Miss Cheryl." 479 00:38:30,096 --> 00:38:31,536 Martin? 480 00:38:40,909 --> 00:38:43,069 Do you reckon we could hang out for a bit? 481 00:38:45,189 --> 00:38:47,629 My parents aren't home. You can come in. 482 00:38:53,789 --> 00:38:55,829 You alright? 483 00:38:57,909 --> 00:39:00,549 Just wanna do something normal. 484 00:39:09,009 --> 00:39:10,989 Hey. 485 00:39:26,309 --> 00:39:29,189 I hope he hasn't hitchhiked. Do you think he'd do something that stupid? 486 00:39:29,269 --> 00:39:30,569 He can't have got too far. 487 00:39:36,269 --> 00:39:37,629 There he is. 488 00:39:39,549 --> 00:39:41,549 He's a funny one. 489 00:39:53,195 --> 00:39:54,615 I'll go. 490 00:39:56,195 --> 00:39:57,755 To the counselling thing. 491 00:39:59,475 --> 00:40:00,715 Why? 492 00:40:03,475 --> 00:40:04,995 We need to talk 493 00:40:05,135 --> 00:40:07,835 and we don't know how to do it anymore. 494 00:40:12,355 --> 00:40:15,595 It's frightening to look into the faces of people you love 495 00:40:15,675 --> 00:40:17,315 and know they're lying to you. 496 00:40:25,595 --> 00:40:26,775 Do you need a lift? 497 00:40:26,875 --> 00:40:28,875 Shall we get pizza? 498 00:40:28,955 --> 00:40:30,555 OK. 499 00:40:32,315 --> 00:40:34,695 I like your house! 500 00:40:34,795 --> 00:40:37,135 It's got... 501 00:40:37,235 --> 00:40:38,755 life. 502 00:40:41,755 --> 00:40:43,415 Yeah, it has got that. 503 00:40:43,515 --> 00:40:46,275 Sometimes a bit too much. 504 00:40:57,435 --> 00:40:59,135 Sorry about yesterday. 505 00:41:02,995 --> 00:41:04,235 Good. 506 00:41:09,915 --> 00:41:11,555 # City girls have got 507 00:41:11,735 --> 00:41:15,475 # Night lights in their eyes 508 00:41:15,655 --> 00:41:20,315 # Ask no questions and get told no lies 509 00:41:20,455 --> 00:41:23,835 # You get hurt 510 00:41:23,955 --> 00:41:28,635 # They're on the flirt again tonight 511 00:41:28,735 --> 00:41:31,515 # Tonight 512 00:41:31,595 --> 00:41:33,135 # Ooh 513 00:41:33,235 --> 00:41:36,115 # Don't fall in love 514 00:41:39,315 --> 00:41:41,035 # Ooh 515 00:41:41,215 --> 00:41:43,995 ♪ Don't fall in love... ♪ 516 00:41:47,675 --> 00:41:49,495 # Ooh 517 00:41:49,595 --> 00:41:53,075 ♪ Don't fall in love... ♪ 518 00:41:53,175 --> 00:41:56,615 Five, four, three, two... 519 00:41:56,775 --> 00:42:00,075 - Countdown! - Countdown! 520 00:42:02,915 --> 00:42:05,915 So tell me again. It's my new favourite story. 521 00:42:08,115 --> 00:42:10,635 We just hung out in my bedroom 522 00:42:10,775 --> 00:42:13,075 and ate sandwiches and drank lemon squash. 523 00:42:14,435 --> 00:42:15,875 And he didn't try anything? 524 00:42:15,955 --> 00:42:17,555 I told you! No! 525 00:42:19,595 --> 00:42:21,495 Press it! 526 00:42:23,195 --> 00:42:24,675 - We missed the beginning. - I know. 527 00:42:24,795 --> 00:42:27,395 I love this song. Let's keep it. 528 00:42:33,755 --> 00:42:36,695 So sandwiches and lemonade. 529 00:42:36,815 --> 00:42:38,715 And then what? 530 00:42:38,815 --> 00:42:41,195 And then he went home. 531 00:42:47,355 --> 00:42:49,395 It's kinda like hanging out with you. 532 00:42:49,515 --> 00:42:51,515 He didn't even try and finger me. 36143

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