Original subtitles

(propeller blades whirring)

(panting)

(lasers blast)

Yeah!

Turn left up here, M.O.D.O.K.! Too late!

Now the wall's on the right. Right!

(Mimi screaming) Are you two even listening to a word I'm saying?

(M.O.D.O.K.) Not really.

No.

What's the matter with you?

Don't drop the bombs, yet. You're wasting them!

Wait till I tell you.

Ah, with those beautiful dulcet tones,

where did you ever get a name like Screaming Mimi?

Ah! What's that supposed to mean?

(screams)

You know, Screaming... Can I call you Screaming?

I heard from a friend of a friend of a cousin of a friend

that Iron Man once said your voice reminds him

of fingernails on a chalkboard

over a loudspeaker during a train wreck.

Iron Man said that. Can you believe it?

He what?

-(screams) -(grunts)

Aah!

(grunts)

(grunts)

-(thud) -(screaming)

(screaming)

What is that you say, Squaddies?

No, I don't think Screaming Mimi's voice

sounds like an industrial accident.

-What a thing to say. -How dare you?

-(screams) -(grunts)

What? Hulk no hear.

-Speak louder. -Thanks, Mimi. Huh!

Now Squaddies, say good night.

Psst, it's daytime.

-Just get them. -(growls)

-(grunts) -(screams)

(growls)

(all screaming)

We are not running away, we are regrouping.

Keep telling yourself that.

Who are you?

Whoa!

Huh? Ooh, where she come from?

And is she free for dinner?

They call me the Black Widow.

With that Infinity Sword, I will rule the universe.

All right, Squaddies, time to Hero Up.

♪ When the bad guys are out ♪

♪ All you have to do Is shout now ♪

♪ Who's gonna Hero Up? ♪

♪ Well, they may not get along ♪

♪ But they're always Fighting strong now ♪

♪ Who's gonna Hero Up? ♪

♪ Who'll save the day? The Super Hero Squad ♪

♪ They'll Hero Up again! ♪

♪ Super Hero Squad! Hero Up ♪

♪ Super Hero Squad! Hero Up ♪

♪ Wolverine and Hulk are fierce Dr. Doom ends up in tears ♪

♪ When Iron Man Joins the fight ♪

♪ Falcon darts in from the sky Silver Surfer by his side ♪

♪ Thor's hammer Has thunder's might ♪

♪ Who'll save the day? The Super Hero Squad ♪

♪ They'll Hero Up again! ♪

♪ Super Hero Squad! Hero Up ♪

♪ Super Hero Squad! Hero Up ♪

♪ Super Hero Squad! Hero Up ♪

♪ Super Hero Squad ♪

I hate those Squaddies.

(Captain America) Copasetic. She checks out.

Natasha Romanov, AKA the Black Widow,

freelance agent of SHIELD.

We've worked with her before.

Welcome aboard. Russian, huh?

Yes, darling.

Could you do me a favor and say "Moose and squirrel?"

No.

My name's Falcon, and I'm here to help. (chuckles)

Uh! You might have heard of me. (chuckles)

Prince of Thunder, son of Odin, the mighty Thor, hmm. Ring a bell?

Darn! He's not all that mighty.

Mightier than thou, knave.

You know, Black Widow, as team leader,

I thought I should show you around the Helicarrier. (chuckles)

Team leader, that's me. Team leader. Leader of the team.

Oh, that's very thoughtful, darling.

(laughs)

Hurrah!

(grunts)

(Hulk) Oopsie.

Hi, friends.

Hey, why everybody looking at girl like that?

My comrades behave like they've never seen a female of their species.

(chuckles) I'm used to it, darling.

Happens all the time.

(beeping)

(clanging)

(Black Widow) I suppose it is somewhat like, how you say, my superpower.

-(chatter) -(gasps)

-(beep) -(Dr. Doom) Report!

I have so much chocolate candy, darling.

Do you think I should eat the caramel or devour the coconut?

What kind of a nonsense question is this?

The caramel, of course.

Coconuts displease me.

Everything is going according to plan.

They suspect nothing.

Well, why should they?

You are an agent of S.H.I.E.L.D.

They have no idea that the earlier battle

was a ruse staged to fool them into trusting you.

Ah, I despise having to talk to do-gooder heroes.

Much better, Mystique.

Now go and gather information,

report what you find,

and do not fail me.

You don't have to order me around.

The pleasure is all mine, darling.

-(click) -Oh, by Odin's smelly sweat socks.

This news must be guarded, lest it fall into the wrong hands.

News? What news can't fall into the wrong hands?

Ah, Black Widow, speak the truth.

Hast thou ever seen greater biceps? Uh? (chuckles)

(grunts) Hulk arms bigger.

Huh! Forget that. What were you just saying before...

Oh, dreameth onward.

Bigger arms than the Prince of Asgard?

Hulk, thou art embarrassing thyself. Huh!

Nuh-uh. Hulk's fly not down. Oh! Uh!

(zips up)

M-Manly!

(scoffs)

How is my favorite Iron Man?

What are you working on, darling?

Um, oh, just-just Helicarrier security codes.

-Real boring stuff. -Security codes?

May I see them?

Uh! First, let me show you something great.

It's this internet video of beavers eating Italian food.

-(laughs) Beavers. -No, stop. I want to see the codes.

I couldn't help but notice that you have a mouth.

Do you like Italian food? Because I know a place.

-Romantic table, you, me, no beavers. -(scoffs)

They won't give me a chance to collect any information.

They won't act normal around the Black Widow.

But maybe they'll speak freely in front of someone else.

Uh! Whoa!

(whistles)

(yelps)

Ha-ha, levity!

(groans)

(growls, grunts)

-(cat yowls) -(grunts)

(groans)

(grunts)

(groans, grunts)

(Hulk) I broke a nail.

His agility's getting better.

Verily. That Pilates really works.

(grunts)

Paddle, paddle, paddle.

Pop up. Balance. Stay on-board. Yeah! Ho!

(grunts, groans)

Iron Man, I have to see the security codes, immediately.

Hey, Thor, buddy, you OK?

You don't sound like yourself.

You're not using that Asgard lingo.

Oh, uh, forsooth.

I, uh, hath, uh, need to see the security codeseth.

Uh! Yon codes. My kingdom for the codes.

Now you sound like bad Shakespeare.

Oh, I forgot to change my Asgard underwear today.

So, Thor away!

-(loud clatter) -(coughing)

(Mystique as Thor groans)

Oh, now that sounded like the old Thor.

♪ I wish I was in Toronto ♪

♪ Eh, eh ♪

(clears throat)

Uh! She's not here.

That is why you came in here, right?

Who, Black Widow? No, no.

But she's great, isn't she?

Huh. Everybody's trying so hard to impress her.

Let me tell you a secret, kid.

Secret? Yes, tell me. What's the secret?

Never fall for the pretty superhero.

Super heroes, super villains, and back-up dancers, in that order.

(grimaces)

Wow!

(Thor hums)

Thor, my old teammate.

Please tell me that you have some secret information for me.

Verily, most secret information.

-Really? What is it? -Well, come closer.

Hah, there!

We have received word we are to proceed

with a top-secret transfer of an Infinity fractal into the vault.

Jackpot.

(grunts)

Hello, darlings.

Iron Man, we'll inish-fay our alk-tay later.

Uh, finish our talk about what?

(tuts)

I forgot to mention earlier, but I will be helping you

with the transfer of the Infinity fractal into the vault.

How did you find out about that? That's top secret.

Relax, darlings. Black Widow is an agent of S.H.I.E.L.D.

And that, that's the whole reason she's here. (chuckles)

OK, makes sense. Full clearance.

(grunts) Scanners are clear, weather's great, everything's quiet.

Guess that means something awful's going to happen, huh?

You have no idea.

(Dr. Doom) Excellent.

In moments, Mystique will lower the defense systems inside the vault.

Then all the Infinity fractals that you fools have failed to retrieve

-will be ripe for the snatching. -Yeah!

Fools? He doesn't mean us, does he?

He better not mean us.

Mimi!

Your vocal screeching is insufferable.

I order you to refrain from speaking around me.

(chortles)

On my command,

all of you will storm the vault.

This will be the greatest inside job, ever!

(beep)

-(ring) -(loud noise)

Golly gee, microwaves are truly a modern miracle.

-Oh, hey, Cap. -(gasps)

-You know Black Widow. -Of course.

Now, which way to the fractal containment area?

Before you go any further, you need to submit to a retinal scan.

(beep)

Your turn, milady.

(chuckles) I am so good.

Next stop, fractal containment area.

(elevator dings)

-Phew! -Finally, last check point.

All the fractals are in here.

Black Widow, you stand guard. I'll make the deposit.

Nothing will go wrong on my watch.

(chortles)

And by nothing, I mean everything.

(chortles)

(beeping)

(humming)

Whoa, what's going on here?

All right, computer, access and override

the vault's innermost security systems.

This is it! The vault is vulnerable! Minions, attack!

(Captain America) Super Hero Squad, we have been compromised.

I repeat, compromised.

The vault's innermost security has somehow been breached.

Those fractals are completely unprotected.

Gee Willikers.

Super Hero Squad, Hero Up!

♪ Who'll save the day? The Super Hero Squad ♪

♪ They'll Hero Up again! ♪

-♪ Super Hero Squad! ♪ -♪ Hero Up! ♪

Stand down.

Oh, popcorn! Popcorn. (chuckles)

(grunts, groans)

It's best if you come along peaceably.

(screams)

(grunts) For apple pie!

Stop yelling at me!

I already have permanent hearing damage from having to work with you.

-(grunts) -(gasps)

Hey, that popcorn is government property.

-(grunts) -(groans)

(chortles)

Klaw, turn the star-spangled one's brains

into sonic sauerkraut.

Uh, no offense.

(groans)

-(crashing) -Uh-oh.

Uh-oh, indeed.

(grunts, groans)

Whoa, wipeout.

(gasps, screams)

(laughs, grunts)

What are you going to do now, Captain America?

Throw your mighty shield and have it rebound off the wall

and hit me in the back of the head?

(chortles)

-(grunts) -(gasps)

Ha-ha! (grunts)

Oh, darn. (screams)

-That hurts! -You know what, M.O.D.O.K.?

You actually are smarter than they say.

Hey, Cap called me smart.

Could you say that loud enough for Dr. Doom to hear?

(both growling, grunting)

(grunting)

(klaxon blares) Uh-oh, that sounds like trouble.

Hold on, Black Widow. Tech Factor on the way.

Cap, what are you doing down here?

I'm here to make sure you'll never leave here alive.

-(grunts) -(groans)

What's gotten into you, Cap? It's me, Iron Man.

-(grunts) -(groans)

(chuckles)

Enjoying the fireworks?

Aah!

-(grunts) -(gasps)

OK, what shapeshifter are you?

-(groans) -Skull, Dire Wraith, Impossible Man?

(yells)

(groans)

Mystique! Well, that was my fourth guess.

Clever, Iron Man, but not clever enough.

That was weird. What?

-(groans) -For the record, I love Italian food.

(groans)

Too bad. All you're going to get is jailhouse spaghetti.

(beeping)

(beeping continues)

(heaves)

Hulk smash!

(grunts)

(both grunting)

Help me, guys. This other Iron Man is an imposter.

Guys, take it from the real Iron Man,

that Iron Man's not the real Iron Man. That's a fake Iron Man.

Oh!

What? Oh, wait. Hold on.

Two Shellheads?

Yon fractal hath born a second Iron Man.

What happened to the Black Widow?

One of the Iron Man is Mystique.

-What? -We should give Mystique a hand,

if we can tell which one she is.

Meh, let's destroy them both to be sure.

-Whoa! -(thud)

Super Hero Squad, you must trust me.

Stop Iron Man.

No, that is not Black Widow. It's Mystique.

(all) Oh!

(Iron Man) She's been an imposter all along.

(all gasp, groan, grunt)

(blows landing)

Enough!

Whoa!

You may have fooled them, but you can't fool me.

Well, actually you can,

and you did, because... Oh, forget it.

(grunts)

(chortles)

Ooh!

Nah! (inaudible)

-What the heck? -Wow!

Oh, gross.

Hey, my head doesn't look that big.

-Gad! -(gasping)

-It's Mystique. -(all) No!

Don't stand there. Destroy them.

(grunting)

Lethal Legion, now.

A force field, and we're on the wrong side of it.

Your plan is a complete success, Dr. Doom.

The path to the fractals is clear.

Excellent.

By the time the heroes get around that force field,

we and all the fractals will be long gone.

(guffaws)

(wheezes)

You'd think that, wouldn't you?

You're not the only one with an undercover agent, Doom.

Songbird, sing.

You got it, Cap.

(Mystique) Songbird. She's an agent of S.H.I.E.L.D.

I did not see that one coming.

(sings)

(grimaces)

Ah! Aha!

(growls, grunts)

(hums)

Well, back to home and hearth.

Good to see that the real Black Widow is safe and sound.

Mystique won't be impersonating anymore S.H.I.E.L.D. agents,

not for a long, long time.

Oh, Hulk not get it.

Pretty lady not really lady?

No, pretty lady was never here.

It was Mystique pretending to be her,

and pretending to be me and pretending to be Cap and pre...

Is any of this getting through to you?

No.

Did she really fool us all, just by being pretty?

Aye, verily.

The son of Odin begs thy forgiveness

for his behavior 'round the, uh-uh, the...

Well, let's call her temptress.

Ah, don't worry, Thor.

I think we all feel sorry for how we behaved around her.

Not I. I did nothing dumb.

Then, perhaps, explaineth her autograph on your surfboard.

We were very lucky.

A shapeshifter can cause big problems

with long-term trust and team chemistry.

Good thing for us, we all trust each other.

It's a good thing we all trust each other?

That sounds like something a shapeshifter would say.

He's right. Get him!

(blows landing)

(Iron Man) No, guys, get off!

Slow down. I'm me. I'm-I'm... I'm me, OK?

Guys, I'm-I'm the real...

I told you to shut your face.

Yeah, come on!