Original subtitles

(Doctor Doom sighs)

No fractals, no heroes.

Doom is bored.

-(MODOK) Hey, who are you? -(lasers blasting)

You can't come in here without the proper authorization.

(MODOK yelps)

-(lasers blast) -(MODOK screams, yelps)

(clang)

(Abomination groans)

I am Thanos!

(MODOK) Yeah, he's cool. Enjoy your visit.

I am not impressed.

Even if you did somehow breach my impenetrable fortress...

Formerly impenetrable fortress.

-(MODOK) Ha-ha! -Yes, there is that.

Well, give me one reason

why I shouldn't destroy you where you stand.

(MODOK) I'm confused.

(grunts)

These are called Infinity gems.

I've searched the galaxy for them,

and I have technology that allows me to track them.

I take it these gems are powerful,

similar to my Infinity fractals...

only for girls.

(Thanos) You scoff?

I am offering you a way to find all of the fractals you seek.

Hmm. And in return?

A trifle, hardly worth mentioning.

You must steal a certain artifact for me

from the headquarters of the Fantastic Four.

Break into the Baxter Building?

I, Doom?

(cackles)

(wheezes)

Oh, this may be the beginning

of a terrible and ugly friendship.

(Doom cackles)

(Doom wheezes)

(Doctor Doom) With that Infinity Sword,

I will rule the universe.

All right, Squaddies. Time to Hero Up.

♪ When the bad guys Are out ♪

♪ All you have to do Is shout now ♪

♪ Who's gonna Hero Up? ♪

♪ Well, they may not Get along ♪

♪ But they're always fighting strong now ♪

♪ Who's gonna Hero Up? ♪

♪ Who'll save the day? ♪

♪ The Super Hero Squad ♪

♪ They'll Hero Up again ♪

♪ Super Hero Squad! Hero Up ♪

♪ Super Hero Squad! Hero Up ♪

♪ Wolverine and Hulk are fierce ♪

♪ Dr. Doom ends up in tears ♪

♪ When Iron Man joins the fight ♪

♪ Falcon darts in from the sky Silver Surfer by his side ♪

♪ Thor's hammer has Thunder's might ♪

♪ Who'll save the day? ♪

♪ The Super Hero Squad ♪

♪ They'll Hero Up again ♪

♪ Super Hero Squad! Hero Up ♪

♪ Super Hero Squad! Hero Up ♪

♪ Super Hero Squad ♪

I hate those Squaddies.

(snoring) Hulk smash.

Hulk want cheese.

Hulk like quesadilla.

Ah, by Odin's beard, 'tis peaceful and serene.

Yeah, it sure 'tis.

No sign of Doom. No sign of any fractals.

It's so quiet, most of the Squad is using up

their accrued vacation hours.

(both grunting)

I'm the best there is at what I do,

and what I do...

-(ball deflating) -...isn't volleyball.

Don't get your musket in an uproar, Brubaker.

I'll be at the Shiloh reenactment.

Hey, it's a Civil War.

What's the worst that could happen?

(laughing)

Bye-bye.

(cracking joints)

(grunts)

(loud boom)

(strains, grunts)

Make yourself useful, Red, and spot me.

Whoa!

(crash)

-(booming) -Whoa!

Did you feel that? The Helicarrier's moving.

Falcon, what are you doing?

Me? Nothing. I mean, I was, uh,

just testing the steering controls.

Okay, I admit it. I redirected our flight path a little.

They're testing new hybrid electric monster trucks today.

I figured no one would mind if I took a look.

Are you telling me

that you arbitrarily changed the flight plan

of a heavily armed, high-tech base

so that you could get a closer look

at trucks driving around in circles?

When you put it that way, it makes it sound so bad.

But come on, man, there's nothing else going on.

I should have seen that coming.

Super Hero Squad, Hero up!

♪ When the bad guys are out ♪

♪ All you have to do Is shout now ♪

♪ Who's gonna Hero Up? ♪

♪ Super Hero Squad! Hero Up ♪

♪ Super Hero Squad ♪

(people screaming)

Uh, Hulk confused.

Everybody, attack.

(laughs) Yeah, that's right.

Now Hulk more confused.

I'm not good with names, but I never forget

an invisible force field.

That's the Fantastic Four!

How's that for an entrance?

Mr. Fantastic, Mr. Fantastic, over here.

Couldst thou explain to, uh, the Hulk

what is happening?

These are jamming sonic waves,

harmless to humans but very disruptive

to shape-changing aliens.

They're Skrulls!

Oh, Hulk understand.

Yes, alien shapeshifters. Their space ships tripped...

-my early warning system... -Yeah, I got to go.

It scans for waste hyperspatial resonances of their star drives.

Reed, darling, don't let them get away.

Hey, move over, you big oaf. I can't get a grip.

(grunting)

Talking rock can't hold

because talking rock not strong,

not strong like Hulk.

(grunts) Dream on, purple pants.

No one's stronger than The Thing.

(grunts) Hulk stronger than Thing.

Nuh-uh. Thing stronger than Hulk.

Oh, that's great. Now you got me talking like you.

(Human Torch) Woo-hoo!

You're pretty fast, Falcon,

but the Human Torch is too hot to handle.

So tell me, Torch, are all of your catchphrases

just different ways of saying how hot you are?

Yeah. You'd think I'd get tired of it, but nope.

Woo-hoo.

Yeah.

Uh-oh.

Ah, never changes.

I always have to clean up after my little brother.

What madness be this?

It's the Super-Skrull,

an old enemy of the Fantastic Four

who's been genetically engineered to match our powers.

Match them all at once.

By Volstagg's tiny feet!

This is your only warning.

Stay out of our way.

The Skrulls will not be stopped.

(Iron Man) What just happened?

They were looking for something or someone.

It's the only reason that aliens would be at a monster truck factory.

Makes sense. Not like anyone would come here for fun.

Uh...

The Skrulls must be planning another invasion.

Their base ship is orbiting the planet Earth.

We have to take it out.

One problem, Stretcho.

I done the math.

Our ship doesn't have enough seatbelts for everybody.

Ben's right.

One person is going to have to stay behind.

Hmm. We'll need our strength factor and our elemental factor,

but our speed factor...

Me? But I want to go into space and fight the Skrulls.

Someone has to stay.

Consider this a slap on the wing for that Helicarrier stunt.

This is so unfair.

You guys get to go into space,

while I have to be in charge down here.

Actually, H.E.R.B.I.E.'s in charge. You'll be his assistant.

(electronic chirping)

All systems go in five, four, three...

Oh, can I call it?

Uh... (groans)

-Knock yourself out. -Blast-off!

I've targeted the Skrull ship.

It's cloaked in a low Earth orbit.

Hey, guys, you're going to want to slow down to. 04

and keep an eye on those cosmic rays.

(Invisible Woman) Falcon, we need you to keep this channel clear.

If you have any problems, you can ask H.E.R.B.I.E.

Just trying to be useful.

So, H.E.R.B.I.E., is there anything I can do to help?

Hello?

Earth to H.E.R.B.I.E.

Oh, great. The schmo-bot doesn't even talk.

(electronic chirp)

(machine powers on)

That sounded like a backup generator kicking in.

Great. Now I'm talking to myself.

Hey, who's the new guy?

Your worst nightmare.

But you can call me Paste-Pot Pete.

You have the worst villain name ever, Pete.

(laughs)

Paste-Pot Pete.

Yeah. That name doesn't exactly strike fear into people, Pete.

Oh, yeah? Well, you guys are jerks.

We're bad guys, Pete.

We're supposed to be jerks, Pete.

-(giggles) -Stop it. Stop it.

-(MODOK) Pete. -(Pete) Stop it!

-Pete, Pete, Pete. -Stop it!

-Pete, Pete, Pete, Pete. -I get it!

Pete, Pete. Who's there? Pete.

-(squeals) -(Doctor Doom) MODOK!

Report!

I've cut main power to the Baxter Building.

All the security and communication systems are down,

and they have no basic cable. (laughing)

Excellent.

The alien artifact is inside Reed Richards' lab.

Retrieve it now!

(Mr. Fantastic) Here's the plan.

We're going to sneak up, board their destroyer ship,

then destroy their ship from the inside.

(lasers fire)

Or we can try plan B.

(alarm blaring)

Hulk like plan B.

Better known as clobberin' time.

Oh, it clobber time.

Talking rock dumb.

Woo!

Ha-ha. Sweet.

Try and keep up, Mr. Green Spleen.

Talking rock not stronger than Hulk.

-Am too! -Am not!

Am too plus infinity!

Criminy.

(Human Torch) Yeah!

My powers might not work in space,

but I can still flame on!

Woo-hoo! Yeah! Take that!

You're going down!

Hey, check it out, sis!

I'm totally going to knock off your high score.

My high score? What is he talking about?

I programmed a bogus high score under your name.

Johnny keeps trying to surpass it.

-You're a genius. -I know.

(Falcon) System still down?

It's been over an hour since the power went out.

-You sure you know what you're doing? -(electronic chirp)

(Abomination coughs, wheezes)

So tired.

Someone supposed to be as smart as MODOK,

you think he could have waited until after

to shut off the power to the elevators.

(MODOK) Oh, boo-hoo-hoo, Pete.

You don't hear me whining.

Now come on. We only have another 20 floors to go.

If I've said it once, I've said it a thousand times,

don't mess with Earth.

(Super-Skrull) You were warned.

Now face the Skrull Empire's greatest warriors.

Troopers, attack.

Zounds! My symbolic tool of righteous aggression!

Truly is Thor shocked.

-(mooing) -Cows?

Uh-oh.

Got the old eyes crossed?

(Falcon) H.E.R.B.I.E., when's the power going to be back on?

H.E.R.B.I.E., what's the meaning of life?

H.E.R.B.I.E., who'd win in a fight, me or the Watcher?

H.E.R.B.I.E., can you disprove the existence of...

-(explosion) -Whoa.

Ha-ha! The HQ of the FF is O-U-R-S!

(MODOK laughs)

We're here for a piece of alien tech in Mr. Fantastic's lab.

Yeah. Hand it over and nobody gets hurt.

Uh, Abomination didn't get the memo.

We're going to hurt you regardless of what happens.

Yeah. (cackles)

I don't know what you're talking about,

but you're not getting in the lab.

Oh, we were hoping you'd say that.

Oh! Oh!

Not a bad shot, Pete.

(chortles)

Stop saying it like that!

What, Pete? That's your name, Pete.

If you didn't like to be called Pete,

you probably should have picked a better name, Pete.

Okay. From now on, call me...

the Trapster.

Uh, no.

We'll stick to calling you Pete.

Okay, how about the Mean Guy Who Does Things?

(MODOK) Really, Pete, you brought this upon yourself.

I mean, just what is a paste pot, anyway?

Nice work, H.E.R.B.I.E.

They're getting away!

Give it up, green bean. You ain't stronger than me.

Hulk strong. Hulk once lift whole building.

Is that so? One time on Yancy Street,

I lifted an entire city block.

Once Hulk pick up whole Super Hero City

and shake it upside-down, just for fun!

Bah! That never happened.

Yeah? Well, Hulk head hurt.

-Hulk got him. -I got him.

Hulk smash!

It's clobberin' time!

I have a plan, but I need someone to distract the Super-Skrull.

Leave that to us.

Bow before the Skrull Empire.

The Skrulls must have a computer network.

Maybe I can hack into it.

Whoa.

(panting)

Squirt, squirt.

Why don't you stick around?

Food fight!

There must be some way to lock this door.

(electronic chirp) Red button.

Got it.

Thanks. That should buy us some...

You can talk? You could talk this whole time

and never said anything?

Up to now, you were doing okay.

(booming)

Try to reroute the backup power to send out a distress signal.

And hurry up, okay? We don't have much time.

(electronic beeping)

Wait, what the darn heck is this?

The Skrull invasion plan.

But if this is true, then...

Cease fire! Super Hero Squad, stop fighting.

What are you doing, Iron Man?

Trust me. Let the Super-Skrull go.

I think we can make a deal.

(Doom pants)

What fool turned off the elevators?

Forget that.

(panting, muttering)

Where is the alien artifact?

Right through here.

(Abomination grunting)

I found this in the lab.

Now eat alien laser cannon!

Not an alien laser.

That's an alien flashlight.

-(electronic chirp) -(chuckles)

Oh, boy.

-(MODOK laughs) -(Paste-Pot Pete) Squirt, squirt.

There. The artifact I seek.

You wretched robot.

Squirt, squirt. Squirt, squirt.

After them!

Come on, H.E.R.B.I.E.

I can still fly us out of here.

Hand it over.

You have nowhere to run.

(Mr. Fantastic) I was about to say the same thing.

Oh, no! No!

No, no!

This is not happening.

Let me explain. I can explain everything.

A little help, anybody?

I'll be your best friend!

Come on, be cool.

What is the meaning of this?

When I hacked into the Skrull computer,

I learned the Skrulls weren't here to invade.

They're here looking for a fugitive Skrull conman,

one who's been going around the universe disguised as...

-(electronic chirp) -Mm-hmm. Thanos.

A Skrull con-man?

Then why did he want this green alien tube?

-What does it even do? -It makes string cheese.

For all their advances, the Skrulls have never figured out

how to make string cheese.

String theorists are willing to pay a fortune for this tube.

This was all about string cheese?

No one makes a fool of Doctor Doom!

Someone will pay for this insolence!

Thank you for your loyal service, Pete,

but the Lethal Legion is going in a different direction.

Cursed superheroes.

Still say I'm stronger than you.

Bah, Hulk strongest there is.

Hey, Falc, the other squad members are due back tomorrow.

Maybe you should go use some of your accrued vacation time.

I think you've earned it.

Sun, chlorine, not a Skrull in sight.

(electronic chirps)

Aah! H.E.R.B.I.E., I feel better already.

(Mayor) Must change.

Change into my swimsuit.

Which way to the cabanas, true believer?

Hulk splash!

Oh. Best vacation ever.

(theme music playing)