Original subtitles

Juggernaut, thou evil miscreant!

-Huh? -(yells)

(grunting)

Huh?

Hulk smash!

(growling)

(grunting)

Unhand yon stolen fractal!

Huh?

(laughing)

(laughing)

Paws off, Sabretooth!

Ahhh!

(grunts) Nobody corners the Juggernaut!

(crashing)

(Falcon) Hey, Jaggerchump!

What if heroes were hiding inside the Great Wall waiting to ambush you?

(grunting)

Uh!

Ahhh! Whoa!

(Sabretooth laughing) You're not a wolverine!

You're a moose! Hey!

Hey! No fair!

(wedding bells sounding)

(gasps) Hey, it is not like that.

Cosmic. Some magic entity is...

(groans)

(grunts)

Whoa!

Not funny anymore!

Oh, Juggernaut!

This is no time for idle laughter!

You and Sabretooth

are supposed to be locating the Infinity Fractals for me!

Dr. Doom.

So you're doing this.

Eh, doing what?

Ahhh!

Ooh, everybody but Hulk dumb.

(Sabretooth screaming) Get off me! Get off me!

Oopsie.

(All) What the...

Who is responsible for these shenanigans?

(Dr. Doom) With that Infinity Sword,

I will rule the Universe!

All right, Squaddies! Time to Hero Up!

♪ When the bad guys are out, all you have to do is shout, now, ♪

♪ Who's gonna Hero Up? ♪

♪ Well they may not get along, but they're always fighting strong, now ♪

♪ Who's gonna Hero Up? ♪

♪ Who'll save the day? The Super Hero Squad ♪

♪ They'll Hero Up... again ♪

♪ Super Hero Squad! Hero Up! ♪

♪ Super Hero Squad! Hero Up! ♪

♪ Wolverine and Hulk are fierce ♪

♪ Dr. Doom ends up in tears ♪

♪ When Iron Man joins the fight ♪

♪ Falcon darts in from the sky ♪

♪ Silver Surfer by his side ♪

♪ Thor's hammer has thunder's might ♪

♪ Who'll save the day? The Super Hero Squad ♪

♪ They'll Hero Up... again ♪

♪ Super Hero Squad! Hero Up! ♪

♪ Super Hero Squad! Hero Up! ♪

♪ Super Hero Squad! ♪

I hate those Squaddies!

(Iron Man) And then, Captain America,

I swear, whatever those blue rays or magic were,

went away and everything just went back to normal.

I got turned into a rock.

(laughing)

Shield has had reports of the laws of nature

going AWOL all over Super Hero City.

Statue's squeegeeing windshields!

Calves born wearing roller skates!

Chickens have been marrying... for love.

More magic. Great.

I recommend you consult with the Sorcerer Supreme of Earth,

Dr. Strange.

He's one of the most powerful magicians in all the Universe!

He's mastered the secrets of both magical and physical energy!

His powers include levitation,

travel to other dimensions, transformation of matter,

Bulgarian cow-tipping, and he's great at Sudoku!

His Eye of Agamotto amulet gives him even more powers,

making him truly the supreme sorcerer!

(Captain America) If anyone can get to this magical mystery spoor, he can.

Huh, Cap said Dr. Strange's house was right here.

Gad, most spooky.

Mayhap a sorcerer's spell hath hidden it from our minds.

(doorbell ringing)

(rapid doorbell ringing)

Good thing the Hulk has no mind to hide from.

Hello? Is there a doctor in the house?

Is there a house in the house?

(Iron Man) Whoa! Don't touch anything!

-(all) Whoa! -Ooh, lots of shaky!

What's that smell?

I smell it as well!

Hello?

Ahhh!

(knocking)

The Wand of Watoomb, The Bands of Cytorak,

The Book of Vishanti!

Oh, and a catalog from JC Whitney!

Verily! We do well to respect these powerful sources of magic!

Hey, I know a magic trick!

Abraca-presto!

-Ah! Most amusing. -Hey! Not bad!

Hey! That's nice. Do you do birthday parties?

Uh? Bring baby birdie back.

Relax, Hulk. It's just a trick!

Oh, it's not real. Neither is this wax figure!

-Could that be any more fake? -Uh, who that?

Its a statue of Dr. Strange.

No... that!

You're seein' things, big guy!

-Salutations and greetings. -(all yelp)

-I am Dr. Stephen Strange. -I'll say.

Welcome to my Sanctum Sanctorum.

Sanctum Sanctorum. Sanctorum Sanctum.

She sells sea shells by the sea shore! Who is "she" anyway?

I've never met her! Come on!

Make yourselves at home, cowgirl!

Tea? Who wants tea, governor?

(hooting)

Ah, the Doc's usually not so,

uh, what's the word? Off his rocker!

Back on to your rocker, wizard! So speaks Thor!

I know why you've come.

(all yelp)

The Eye of Agamotto sees all.

Even your innermost thoughts!

(Iron Man thinking) Oh, magic freaks me out.

Although that enchantress sure is a looker.

(Falcon thinking) He's the Sorcerer Supreme of our entire dimension?

Maybe the job stress is gettin' to him.

(Hulk thinking) Hulk smash!

(Thor thinking) Hmm, doth these leggings make me look fat?

-(laughing) -You're just big-boned.

You seek the cause of the magical disturbances in the air, I take it.

Bingo! But do you know how to stop it?

The Orb of Agamotto shall reveal the culprit!

Eye of Agamotto, Orb of Agamotto...

What was it, buy one get one free at Magic Mart?

(shushing)

Ostendo sum nobis

atrum dimension!

What be yon strange and terrible vistas?

Why, it be, uh...

(clears throat) I mean, it is an alternate realm

known as the Dark Dimension!

Aw, how come it's never the duckies and bunnies dimension?

(Dr. Strange) Behold the Dread Dormammu.

Ruler of the Dark Dimension!

He has been reaching into this world,

trying to locate the Infinity Fractals!

♪ Dormammu ♪

♪ Dormammu! Sonnez la matine! ♪

♪ Frere Jacques, Frere Jacques! Dormammu! ♪

Oh, I like a little brie, please?

No! He hates the singing! Quiet!

Doc! We need to keep this Dormammy guy

from magically messing with Super Hero City!

Ooh! Hulk smash!

(all) No!

How do we get to the Dark Dimension?

Step right up, my friends.

What you need is a portal to the Dark Dimension!

Step right up!

Be the first in your neighborhood to have one, yeah.

Spatefacio a prodigium

ut luxor miragum venetium dimension!

(Dormammu laughing)

Something has broken the mind

of your Sorcerer Supreme,

Dr. Stephen Strange!

Now, now nothing can stop the Dread Dormammu

from conquering this dimension!

(laughing)

(laughing)

You set us up!

Psst. Your head's on fire!

Now that I'm in this dimension...

(Wolverine) You're goin' right back where you came from, bub!

We got enough trouble chasing down Infinity Fractals.

(growling)

Uh!

Ahhh!

Dude, your head is on fire!

No need to lower myself to battle the likes of you.

Mindless ones!

(Dormammu) The mindless ones!

Un-living creatures who do my bidding!

(growling)

(growling)

(struggling)

Dormammu and the Mindless Ones. I have all your albums.

Well here's another one-hit wonder!

(grunts)

Huh?

Oh, right! Magic! I hate magic!

(groans)

(struggling)

Hulk smash!

(roaring)

Ahhh!

(groans)

Fly mindless ones!

Claim this world for Dormammu!

Time to Hero Up, Squaddies!

♪ When the bad guys are out, all you have to do is shout, now ♪

♪ Who's gonna Hero Up? ♪

♪ Who'll save the day? The Super Hero Squad ♪

♪ They'll Hero Up... again ♪

♪ Super Hero Squad! Hero Up! ♪

Split up and get him!

(roaring)

Hey!

Flame on!

I'll show you who's a mindless one!

Ha!

(grunts)

My thanks, Johnny Storm!

But, you were blasting into your own headquarters.

Eh, Reed will just fix it like he always does.

If you are sure this is appropriate human behavior.

C'mon! Light this puppy up!

Ah!

(laughing)

-(Dormammu) Knock, knock. -Who dares?

Huh?

The spells of protection around this fortress are feeble,

but they mark you a threat to Dormammu!

-(groans) -Before I end your useless existence,

tell me, what is an Infinity Fractal?

(people screaming)

Can't a girl design a simple cocktail dress

without some fashion victim attacking the city?

Have at thee, base creature.

(grunts) Ah!

(grunts)

(Hulk) Incoming!

Dumb one leave Bug Girl alone!

(grunts)

-He did warn ya! -So he did.

Good team work, Hulk!

Who's a good boy?

Ahhh!

Yeah.

-(growls) -Need a hand, Thor?

No. I'm good. I got it.

I'd say we got 'em!

Yeah? (laughing) What did you do?

-(growling) -It was just a question.

Just a question.

That's only the last of the stooges.

The main guy's still around!

(Dormammu laughing) The main guy is everywhere!

This pathetic dimension is ended!

We have a big problem!

(laughing)

(laughing)

Cap!

(Dr. Doom screaming)

-Dr. Doom? -Dormammu must have been to the Vault

and taken all the fractals we've recovered!

(screaming)

(laughing)

Careful. Every known Infinity Fractal is embedded in Dormammu's collar.

He's the most powerful villain in town.

Tough break, Doom.

(screaming)

Dormammu reigns supreme!

(laughing)

(Wolverine groans)

(laughing)

(Wolverine) No problem, Adamantium skeleton!

(moans)

Salutations and greetings.

It's about time you showed up, Stephen.

Ho-ho, who?

Ha! Think again, Doorman Moo!

That's Dor-Mam-Mu!

We got a Sorcerer Supreme on our side!

(blowing raspberry) Hibbity-Bobbity, baby!

I'm not gonna stand for you and who and you and all your... (yodeling)

(screaming)

Oh!

(gobbling)

(screaming)

Eh?

Huh?

Ah!

(gulps)

What is this foolishness?!

All right, now I'm really steamed.

I don't mean to press you, but don't play dumb with us.

You two magic boys are obviously working together.

Plus, your clothes are all wrinkly.

Nonsense!

Dr. Strange will be the first I destroy!

He's right, I'm left.

You are gone! I'm late for a bus! Still here? Not really.

Oh, yeah? Prove it, crazy pants.

Make your Eye of Agamotto show us your true nature!

All right! But I warned ya!

I'm starting to understand him.

(Dormammu) An Infinity Fractal!

Inside the Eye of Agamotto!

So that's why the Doctor has been acting so, well, strangely.

Even for a guy named Strange!

I must have it!

(Falcon) Oh, no, you mustn't!

Give the Infinity Fractal to me, Dr. Strange,

and I will allow you to live!

-This is crazy! -Relinquish the fractal!

Can you not see? Dormammu is enormous!

(Hulk) Hulk fry flame head!

(grunting) A non-stick pan I may be,

but a non-stick pan imbued with the Power Cosmic!

I call upon the Flames of the Faltine!

Hey, Flames!

Feel the power of Iron Man!

On the cotton setting!

(grunting)

Dr. Strange... (grunting) don't you get it?

There's something in your eye!

You dirty Mary-Margaret! How dare you!

Kumalatta veesta!

More magic. Great.

Ahhh! (groans)

(groans)

(laughing)

I have it!

And I am free of the fractal's power!

Dormammu, how dare you enter this dimension?

Fool! You summoned me forth!

Fourth? Hulk thought him summoned you first!

Well, I'm un-summoning you now!

Alstentendo sunobus altrum dimensions!

-Ahhh! -Return to your world of evil.

(screaming)

(Dr. Strange) Your powers are weakening, evil one!

Now Dr. Strange is master, and you are lost!

No!

By the mighty Vishanti, begone!

Propinguius prodigium ut atrum dimension!

You cannot defeat the Dread Dormammu!

I shall return!

Well, if you do, we'll be sure to bring more marshmallows.

Because seriously, your head is on fire.

-Fire! -Like that's weird.

-(growling) -(grunts)

Thanks for the save, lady.

Oh, these liberated women of today.

Equal pay for equal work, I say!

See you around the USO!

Fools! Doom will prevail!

Now we just have to get all these fractals to the vault

before Doom's goons come back.

Restituo!

Magic does have its uses.

Huh. You've never been abracadabra-ed into a putter.

I'll stick to hi-tech, thanks.

Yeah, leave the magic to the experts.

Abraca-presto! Hey!

(Dr. Strange) No, Falcon.

Leave magic to the Sorcerer Supreme!

David Copperfield?

(squawking)

Huh?

Uh...

(wailing)

(ghostly moaning)

(screaming and panicked chatter)

(Dr. Strange) Even as my friends, the Super Hero Squad,

exit post-haste,

I sense an eerie presence

creeping from my kit...

Mighty Vishanti! My brownies!

I left them in the... (coughing)

I left them... (coughing) in the oven!