Original subtitles

You go straight home, or I'll kick you asses!

Yeah, right!

No, seriously. I'll kick your asses big time!

Hey, boss, shall we roll?

Yo, smartass, cut the crap, okay? Or maybe you wanna walk!

Come on, Mihai, take care of your brother!

Never mind, I can take care of it myself!

Yeah, daddy!

Hey, you kinda like Elena!

Are you stupid? How can I like that four eyes?

Come on, bro, I saw you staring at her! You're hanging together all day long!

No, I don't like her!

Come on, drop it, I'm sure you'd like to bang her!

What does 'bang' mean?

Feel her up', bro, play with her pussy, show her the one-eyed snake!

Here's that sissy from the 2nd floor! Let's go get him!

Tiny Dick, how are you. Did your ma send you to the market?

If you don't leave me alone, I'll tell on you!

Tiny Dick is gay! Are you a bum bandit? Let's check his bag!

Ice cream!

Look what you have here for me! How do you talk to me?

Respectfully, boss!

That's it!

Come on, we got something here!

Fuck your dead relatives!

What did you say?

You're a sucker if you don't beat him up!

Hold on! Why are you moving? What did you say?

Kick his ass! Break his neck! Come on!

Do you want some more?

Marilena from P7

C'mon junior, hurry up.

Hello, uncle Costel!

Hi there! Did you come back here again?

You have some big nephews there, uncle Costel!

It seems like only yesterday they were as big as a needle!

Well, they grow up, the little devils!

You kind of forget it.

I did.

The chicken, it speaks!

What you doing? I thought you'd never show up!

Yo, Saysage, didn't I tell you not to come here alone?

I'll tell mama that you're smoking.

And I'll tell her you asked me for a cigarette and I didn't give you any.

Stupid old bitch!

Uncle Costel, what have you planted here?

This and that.. Some tomatoes, some cucumbers.. Things that everybody grows

It went to hell...

Where did it go?

Andrei! Hey, little bugger, who's your favorite uncle?

You are, uncle Costel!

Come on, get a cigarette for your favorite uncle!

They're all gone.

Come on, bro, here come the peaches.

I like the one with big tits, the fuckin' bitch?

The one in the blue dress and boots is not bad either.

What about that one, isn't she nice?

Check out the legs on that one.

They are so fit, man.

Check out the one in the short skirt.

Yeah, she is fucking hot! -She is super-fucking-freakin' hot!

Look at them sexy legs.

They're gross.

Marilena is the hottest... -I'll leave you with those peaches.

Go ahead, you don't belong here anyway.

Andrei likes that girl with the orange hair.

No shit. Now you know what I like.

Cut the crap. You love that orange-haired one.

He's mad about her.

What a shitty car. -The yellow racer.

He's gonna take the one Andrei likes.

Come here, you!

I don't wanna!

Come here at once! Move it!

Don't you get it? I don't wanna.

Check it out. She doesn't wanna go.

She's got higher standards.

Honestly, I rate the one in blue the highest.

You can't be serious.

Check it out. -Make way for the Mercedes.

Butica's wife is going for the Mercedes. -That Mercedes is so cool.

This is cool.

I still think the big-titted one is the best.

Look at the skirt Big-tits is wearing. -But the curly one.. oh man!

What a speed on him. I bet he'll get the best chick.

It's that slick Giani

What are you talking about? The Blond can take him down with one hand!

Does not.

Are you looking for trouble or what?

Sit down or they'll see us.

How are the little peaches?

I don't know what's in your head.

You wouldn't wanna know what's in my head. Wanna go for a ride?

I don't know. Let's see.

See what? Come on! Wanna go for a ride?

I don't know, talk to the boss.

What's up?

Hi!

If I had one of them fancy cars, I'd take that cool chick in black.. And I'd bang her like that.

If I had a car like his, I'd take that bitch with the curly hair.

I'd fuck her good and proper.

That curly has some schemes that drive you nuts, bro.

Give me a break. I like that Elena.

Go play with your dick in the sand or we'll turn you in, to the pros.

Hey, big teeth, did anyone ask you?

That fat one is on the hustle.

Look at the tits on this one. -These ones are gonna do it.

It's gonna get crowded in there.

Look at the old hag. She knows her shit.

Chill out, granny.

...Florin Salam featuring Daniela coming up next....

...for all the cool and stylish girls...

Cut it out! I wanna sleep.

Hey, the teacher told me in school you can go blind if you do that. Don't be stupid.

Shut up!

Hey, cut it out!

Nicu, take this meat and jelly to cool down a bit.

Come on, Nicu, my stew is one the stove.

Come on, love, I'm watching tv.

Good evening and all the best, my dears.

The mating season started for the Memestra/bBrassicelli butterflies this week.

You look very pretty like this.

Don't you say! Do really think so?

Yup. I like thos little ears.

What? I think it was like a short circuit.

It's because of me. It happens to me every now and then.

You? -Yes.

Come on...

I swear.

Don't tell me you're one of these with weird energies.

How are your girlfriends?

What girlfriends?

I don't know. Those girls you fancy talk all the time.

I have no girls. What got into you?

I can't believe you don't have some pussy at home.

I don't, but look at this little cock here, just for you.

Nicu, are you listening?

Why don't you take care of the kid's education?

Look at him, doing that hing in our home, in my home!

Don't you have toys to play with?

How can you do such a thing?

You taught him to drive the trolleybus...

Like that's education.

I want him to go to university and you teach him to drive the trolleybus.

You jackass!

Go to your room!

You're not going into no room, to do the thing you do.

Go outside and take 20 push-ups, to spill your guts out.

Come on, move it! Get this crap out of your head.

You even ruined my meat and jelly.

Come on, Nicu, say something!

What? You're feeling guilty yourself, huh?

If I catch you again with those tabloids in my home, for the kids to see them,

I don't know what I'll do to you...

And tell me what you do with your salary.

Why don't you bring it home?

You know the costs we have...

Where is the salary, huh?!

Don't make me go to the depot and see how much you earn.

Or do you have a sweetheart?

I told you before, I'm not seeing anyone.

No one... Then, what do you do?

Cause you didn't do anything with me for quite some time now...

Maybe the kid is taking after you. You assholes!

Jerk-offs!

Listen, do you mind if I drop you here 'cause I have some things to do.

You're a princess.

Hey bitch, wanna fuck?

Suck my dick, bitch!

Good morning! It's a beautiful day on XXL FM...

This goes out to all F.C. Dinamo hooligans. Good luck for tonight's game...

Calm down, kid, there's no need to worry.

There's nothing wrong with that.

But your daddy asked me to talk to you.

OK?

Well son, it's tough with the girls.

All they want is money and then more money.

How much money?

A lot, a lot...

So if you have money they stay with you?

Well, just a while, till they eat it up, and then look for another sucker...

They eat it up?!

I mean they spend it on crap.

Listen... do you have a girl?

Well, do you think I have any money, kid? None of them wants me.

To hell with them bitches!

So... I guess you also need a car, right?

A car and a home!

Well... I have a home.

You don't. Your papa does.

You think your mom would stay if your papa had no home?

She'd be long gone, what the hell!

My mom loves my dad!

Did you see that? Listen to him...

Mom! Dad!

Where are you going? Tell me where you're going.

I have some stuff to do, okay?

I'm coming with you.

You can't come. I'm busy!

What's up, little dick? Got something on your mind?

What?

And what do you want me to do?

Hey, bro, this is not good. I gave you the money.

Look. I'll give you half of the money so...

Look here, I was wrong.

Take half of the money, take your toy too, and go home.

Fuck off

What's up with him?

Huh? What are you doing here?

Get the hell out of here, you pedophile. Move it!

So... the girls don't want it? -Want what?

Money.

What money?

Wanna spend it?

Fried meatballs, sausages, 17:00 Elvis live.

Hello! Hello, miss! What's the deal? Going in without ordering?

We'll order boss, 'course we will... When we get out.

Nice pussies.

I'm waiting outside, girl.

OK. That's enough for you!

Good evening and welcome to the pub where Elvis Romano sings.

Let's choose a song. What do the dice say?

Song number one.

Love Me Tender.

With a sweet dedication to Miss Petronela from mister Nicu, who filled my guitar with coins.

Shall I bring you anything else?

Some juice.

One champagne cocktail like this and some juice.

Listen girl, what's the thing with this Giani?

You haven't got a clue. We're in love. -So you're getting married, girl?

Girl, are you in the mood for trouble or what? -No, I was just asking. What?

What's your name?

Andrei.

What grade are you in?

The ninth.

How old are you?

17... almost.

So how come you are a ninth grader at 17? Are you a repeater or what?

No... my folks sent me to school a bit later.

He's lying, girl. He's barely 14.

Oh, but I am! -So where's your ID?

At home!

What about your dick? Is it a home too?

No, I have it on me! "I have it on me"! So where is it?

And what do you wanna do with it?

Well, you know...

I don't. Why don't you tell me?

Let's go to your place and get laid.

That's impossible.

How come?

Well... do you have a car?

No. -You see?

Come on, enough talking. Let's go!

Will you go with me when I have a car?

When you have a car, we'll definitely go together.

Come on, Marilena.

Hey, get her phonenumber, sucker.

What? You already got a car?

Give me your phone number.

What d'you need it for?

I'll call you when I get my car.

I don't have any paper on me.

Are you goin' to the bitches? Are you goin' to the girls from P7?

It looks like we don't communicate.

You are crying for nothing. I didn't go to no bitches. I don't know anything.

So where's the money?

I don't know, I'll find out.

Went to the bitches... I didn't do anything.

This fell down, got broker.. To hell with everthing!

Run!!!! The tits are attacking us!

...and how are you all doing? This is Bobi Digital on XXL FM with the best music...

...you can call for requests starting now...

...this is still Bobi Digital, Letha Lover, you can call for request at 0743...

Eh... hello... I'd like to request a song.

Go on my friend, say it.

I'd like to request a song of Elvis Presley.

Yeah... -Is that possible?

For Marilena from P7 -Ok.

Hey, check this out. I got a criminal idea. Absolutely crazy.

All the bitches in the world will be at our feet.

That curly one too? The one I like?

That one too, man. I'll get her for you personally.

Check it out. My dad's a bus driver.

He sometimes takes me with him, to teach me how to drive, right?

He took me too.

He took you too. He took us both, to teach us how to drive, right?

Come on, daddy... That's it! You see?

You know it. That's it, my boy.

No, wait a minute.

You don't press it like this, but gently... You see?

Oops, get the steering wheel, sonny. Come on now, you're my son.

He! Come on! What are you doing?

You don't press the brakes so hard. Come on.

Get the steering wheel to the left, to the left! That's it.

Sit down over there, you're driving him crazy.

What are you doing here?

You don't come to see the match?

We'll go later. Leave us alone, we have things to do.

Boys, here is the plan. Mihai, Cristi and Matei attack...

It won't work, man.

Why so, my friend?

Last time I went there, I saw two Dobermans inside.

My God! I one them gets you, you're done, bro.

And there was another guard in the back.

And dad won't let me stay out of the house after nine o'clock.

Yeah.. the same with us.

I'm gone man. I want to watch the game.

I'll see you tomorrow.

I'll see you tomorrow, right?

Fuck your mother!

What do you want?

Do you still wanna steal that bus tomorrow?

Go! Go!

Get lost!

The number you have dialed is not in service.

You are so dead! Hold it!

We'll get it big at home.

Take the curve.

Left! Take the curve!

This is good, man.

Come on!

Hey you, come here!

Come on, please!

Hi there!

...and at the end of this show with one and only Florin Salam...

Police! -They wanna stop our broadcast...

Keep going. It's ok.

Keep going. Keep it this way.

Faster! Faster!

I'll run the red light.

Come on man! Run the red light!

Come on. It's ok, let's hurry!

Drive! Drive! Drive!

Drive faster! Watch that car on the left.

Run the red light! -It's green!

Press harder!

Fuck you! Fuck you, assholes!

Fuck you in the... in the...

One, two, three and... I'll shove it up your sister.

What are you doing?

I'll do the talking, ok?

C'mon!

Enough!

What's up?

What are you doing here?

Where's Marilena?

Marilena? Marilena is writing an essay. A quick one.

And where is she?

Yeah right, where is she?

Upstairs.

Upstairs where?

Come on, tell me! Why did you come here?

Gottcha!

Stay here! -Let him go!

He's my son! He's my son! I wanna take him home!

He is my son, right? So he is my son! Shut up!

Quiet! Quiet or I'll kick you asses!

What's with this noise?

He is my son, right? So he is my son!

What the fuck are you doing here? Go over there!

Do you wanna bring the police into our house? Is this what you want?

I wanna get my kid back, man. Leave me alone.

Wait a second!

So tell me... Do you love?

Of course I love you, kitten. Aren't you my little peach?

Yup.. So.. how much do you love me?

Come on! Are we starting again with that?

Fuck it!

What's wrong?

What's up? What's this?

Get out of here!

What have you done, bitch?

What did you do? Fuck you, stupid bitch!

What have you done?

Get the fuck out of here! Move it!

Get the fuck out of here!