Original subtitles

(Dramatic music)

(electronic beeping)

(siren wailing)

(slow instrumental music)

(inhaling)

(clearing throat)

- What time will you be home this evening?

Oh.

(Knocking)

Oh, don't get up, dear.

I'll get it.

- We're here for Mister O--

- There'll be some papers that...

(birds chirping)

- Malcolm, hi.

We want you to come with us, Malcolm.

Okay, there's no need for--

- Who is this?

- There's no need for alarm.

- Nothing, just a short ride.

- Just calm down. - Who are you?

- We're going for a little ride, Malcolm.

- I'm not going for any ride.

- We're going for a little ride.

- Joan, who is it?

- Malcolm, now just calm down.

- What is going on?

Let go of me!

- Calm down.

- Joan!

Let go of me!

(Table and dishes clattering)

- Cut him off!

- Ah!

Ah! Ah!

- Calm down, Malcolm!

- Stay away!

Who are you?

- Slow down now. - Stay away from me!

Stay away!

Just stay away!

- Malcolm.

- [Man] Come on, Malcolm.

Malcolm, come on.

- [Man] Get the cuffs on him!

(Grunting)

Hurry up!

(Water splashing)

(grunting)

Malcolm! Help!

(Grunting)

- Put him down!

Put him down, Malcolm.

- [Man] Ah! Wah!

(Water splashing)

- Eh! Oh!

Eh!

- Get the cuffs on him.

- Oh! Oh!

Ah.

Ah.

- [Man] Okay, get the cuffs.

Okay, where's the jacket?

- [Man] Here.

- [Man] Hold him.

I'll get the jacket.

(Coughing)

- [Man] Now calm down.

(Screaming)

Here.

Get him up.

At least get him.

(Screaming)

Come on.

(Screaming)

- Joan!

Ah, ah.

- Calm down, Malcolm.

It's all right.

(Screaming)

Roll him over.

(Grunting)

Here.

Okay.

All right.

Fuckin' idiot.

- Joan!

Joan!

Ah!

Ah-ha.

Ah.

Ah, ah, ah.

- [Man] Okay, help him up.

- Ah, no!

Help!

(Screaming)

Ow!

- Just calm down.

Slow down, man.

- I don't wanna go again!

- Come on!

- Joannie!

No, don't take me!

Don't take me!

Why are all taking me?

I don't wanna go!

I don't wanna go!

Joan, help me!

Joan!

Help me!

Oh God!

(Slow jazz music)

* If you need someone to love

* To get you through another day *

(phone ringing)

* I'm the one your thinking of

(phone ringing)

* I will make him pay

* For the pain that he's done

- Bon jour.

Oh, hello.

Can you talk louder?

Oh, oh, tonight?

Well, if you really need me, see.

Yeah, but, girl, my boyfriend,

he's opening a play tonight

and I was planning on,

I see.

Well, do you think maybe you could get somebody else?

Uh-huh.

Yeah, I know.

I know.

How about if I came a little later?

I see.

All right.

No, I can't take the address down now.

I'm in the shower.

Look, I'll call you right back, okay.

Yeah, thanks.

Bye.

* Help is on the way

* I will love you

* Help is on the way

* I won't desert you

* Help is on the way

(phone ringing)

* Help is on the way

- Ello?

(Speaking in foreign language)

- Hello?

Linda?

- Oh, hi Brett.

I was just practicing, um,

the French for that yogurt commercial

in case I got it.

- Oh hey, yeah, that was great.

Hey, listen.

Linda, look.

I got a seat for ya right down front.

- Brett?

I can't make it.

- What?

Baby, it's my opening night!

Look, I'm counting on you!

- I know, but the agency says I have to work

or they'll fire me,

and I can't afford to lose them.

It's the only way I can have my days free

to get my acting jobs.

- Don't the parents take the kids out

trick-or-treating or somethin'?

- Yeah, but some people are running off

to Las Vegas for a surprise party.

So if I don't work, the agency will drop me.

- You don't need 'em.

- Oh, you'll support me then?

- Look.

You know I'm not really in a position to do

that right now, you know?

But I will be.

- I need this stupid babysitting job.

These rich people pay too well.

- I need you here with me.

- I want to be there with you, but I can't.

- Look, how many times you gonna get to see me play Othello?

- Oh, you're too young to play Othello.

- Yeah.

I'm lowering my voice.

- Oh, Brett, I do love you,

and I want to be with you.

But I have to work.

Ah, but I know.

I've got the address and the telephone number

of where I'm going to be, and uh...

(paper zipping)

Why don't I give it to you and you can come over later?

I mean, nobody's gonna be there except

me and the kid.

And he'll probably be asleep,

so we could have some fun.

- Okay.

I'll see ya, I gotta go.

Bye.

(Crickets chirping)

(engine cranking)

(screaming)

- Hey!

Hey, baby, listen.

You know where this ah, take it easy.

You know where this 421026th Street is?

- Uh, yes.

It's just a couple blocks down there.

- Oh, 'cause they keep changing the streets around here.

- Yeah, I know, it's really hard.

- Hey, listen.

I'm going to this party.

- Yeah?

- Why don't you come along?

We'll have a ball.

- Oh, no, I gotta go to work.

- No, I mean it.

- No, really, some other time.

- Come on.

- [Linda] Some other time, I promise.

- What's the matter, baby?

Don't you like to party?

(Engine starting)

(engine rumbling)

(crickets chirping)

- Christopher, are you in here?

Christopher?

- [Christopher] I'm putting on my Halloween costume, sir.

- Oh.

- Christopher?

You turn that light on.

And you come out here now.

Well, you're not putting on your Halloween costume.

Why did you lie to Richard?

- Well, I was about to put it on,

but I was just trying on some ghost makeup.

- In the dark?

What have I told you about lying?

- All right, Joan, lighten up on the kid.

- Excuse me.

Have you finished packing?

- Well, I just thought the kid could,

ah, never mind.

Forget it.

You know?

- Now clean up this room.

- Well, can't you take me out trick-or-treating?

- [Joan] You know that Richard and I

have to go to this party.

It's business.

- It's not business.

It's a party.

- [Joan] It is business.

- It's fun.

- Ah, now Christopher, you've got to learn

that everything in life is not just fun.

Now give me a kiss.

(Kiss smacking)

Now you be a good boy.

- I'll be a good boy if you give me

the Wizard of Siam trick.

- I'll get it for you when I get back.

(Dramatic strings music)

(bell ringing)

(dog barking)

(doorknocker knocking)

(crickets chirping)

(doorknocker knocking)

Linda.

- Joan Adams?

- Mmm.

Ah, excuse me for being in a such a rush,

but we haven't finished packing yet.

All the trick-or-treat candy is there.

If you'd do me a favor and please feed the dog.

The dog food I left out on the counter.

Christopher should be in bed by 11 o'clock.

I left a list of all the phone numbers

up in on the dining room table of where we'll be.

We'll be back by tomorrow.

- Great, okay.

- Thank you.

- Mmm-hmm.

(Door clicking)

(humming)

- [Joan] Hi.

- Hi.

- Have you got everything?

- I think so, sure. - Oh.

Have you got the airplane tickets?

- Yup, right here.

- And the address?

- Yup.

- And the credit cards.

- No, you have them.

- Oh. (Chuckles)

I wonder what made the Newtons think of

inviting us to their Halloween party this year.

- It's because we're such a charming couple.

- Mmm.

(Kisses smacking)

- Mmm.

- Why don't you go down and fix us a drink?

- Okay.

- Oh.

- Ah yes.

Here they go.

Thank you.

(Laughing)

See you there.

(Humming)

(dramatic synth music)

(inmates chatting in background)

- Now it's your move.

You're gonna lose again, Bert.

- I guess I'm just a born loser.

(Laughing)

- I gotta get out of this place.

I'm gonna bust outta here,

and this time I mean it.

- You've been here for four years, Malcolm.

You should call it home.

- I had a home once.

And I'm gonna get it back!

(Fist slamming)

Hi, Doctor.

- How are you doing, Malcolm?

- Fine.

When am I gonna get out of here, Doctor?

- Oh, any day now, any day.

- That's what you said a year ago, Doctor.

- Be patient, be patient.

- I am a patient.

- Now why did you say that to him?

You know he's as mad as a hatter.

- You have to humor these people, Nurse Reeves.

They're crazy.

- Yeah.

- Heh, heh.

- Thank you, Farley.

Bert.

You know what day this is?

Halloween.

- That's right.

- There are costumes and wear different clothes

and things like that.

- Right.

- Disguises. - Yeah.

- Perfect night for me to bust out of this bug house, Bert.

- You're crazy.

- You're crazy, Bert.

I'm mad.

(Dramatic music)

(whistling)

- Well, hello there.

- Hello.

(Laughing)

- You must be Linda.

- Yes.

Mr. Adams?

- Please call me Richard.

- [Linda] Okay. (Laughing)

- Would you, ah, like a glass of brandy, Linda?

- No, no thank you.

- [Richard] Are you sure?

- Mmm-hmm.

(Sniffing)

(laughing)

- Not even a little sip?

- No, no.

- Come on.

- No. (Laughing)

- Just a little.

Ooh.

- Ah, this is really a fabulous place you have here.

How did you happen to find it?

- Um. (Chuckles)

You might say I inherited it.

- Mmm.

- Come here.

(Mumbles)

Diamonds.

Definitely your stone.

- This is really beautiful, but my birthstone is the ruby.

(Laughing)

- Huh.

Well, ah,

would you like to see my tap dance?

* Da da da

- [Linda] Tell me, how did you happen to inherit this place?

- Um, brains. (Chuckles)

Brains, my dear.

(Laughing)

Brains.

Which is something ah,

you may or may not know a bit about.

- Oh!

(Tapping)

- Ah.

Well ah, darling. (Chuckles)

I was just showing um,

ah, Linda...

this present

I bought for you.

- Oh, darling, it's gorgeous.

Get the bag, will you?

- Certainly, sweetheart.

Oop.

- Mmm.

Actually it's the only reason I married him.

- Oh yes, he's a real charmer.

(Soft suspenseful music)

- Help yourself to anything.

- Thank you.

- Richard, we're going to be late.

- Oh, wait.

I haven't met your little boy yet.

- Oh, he's around somewhere.

You'll find him.

Or he'll find you.

(Tsking)

- Goodnight, Linda.

(Laughing)

You look so good.

Now listen, try not to get arrested, okay?

(Engine starting)

(guillotine rattling)

(blade clattering)

- Christopher?

Christopher, where are you?

Christopher?

(Suspenseful music)

(blade clattering)

(screaming)

- You're cute.

Are you the babysitter?

- Well, you're not cute.

That's a stupid thing to do.

- It's Halloween!

- Doesn't matter.

You could hurt yourself!

- I won't.

- Well, you scared me.

Can you get out of that thing?

- Yeah, sure.

- You be careful, young man.

- Hey, I'm cool.

(Doorknocker knocking)

- [Both] Trick or treat!

- Oh!

Oh, what are you?

A policeman?

- [Kid] Yeah, the local policeman.

- Oh.

Here you go.

- Thank you.

- You're welcome.

A witch!

- Yeah.

Boo! - Ooh! (Chuckles)

Happy Halloween.

- Thank you.

(Explosion booming) (screaming)

- Oh! (Laughing)

You little brat!

What was that? (Coughing)

- Magic trick.

Don't you like tricks?

- No.

And do you know what I do to little boys

who are practical jokers?

- Hey! Hey!

What are you doin'?

I'm sorry.

Let's be friends.

What's your name?

- Linda.

- Pleased to meet you, Linda.

(Buzzer buzzing)

- Okay, that's it.

Okay.

Ah!

(Knocking)

Ah!

(Thumping)

- Sucka!

- Hey baby, all right.

- Mmm, hot.

Ow!

- Now I gotta remember this place!

(Dramatic synth music)

- That is the most disgusting thing I've ever seen.

Now I told you to play with your toys nicely

and what are you doing?

Stop it!

(Inmates talking in background)

- It's my turn, my turn.

- You quit playing with yourself.

(Laughing)

(inmates talking in background)

(thumping)

(blowing)

- Hey, I won!

I won.

- Ah!

(Inmates talking in background)

You know, I've been thinkin' about it, Bert.

I'm formulating my plan of escape.

- Malcolm, you're--

(dominoes clattering)

Malcolm, you ain't gettin' out of here.

You know, I tried it and they knocked my teeth out.

- Oh, I'm gettin' out, Bert.

And when I do, I'm gonna get her,

her lawyers, and that two-bit gigolo she's married to.

- Don't forget the doctors.

- Oh, I'm gonna get the doctor, Bert.

- Are you going tonight?

- [Woman] If you can't play nicely, I'm not going to play.

All right?

- As soon as it's beddy-bye time,

it's adios amigos.

- Gee, Malcolm, I didn't know you could speak Spanish.

- Amigos.

A me goes.

Yeah?

(Laughing)

Come here, Bert.

- [Bert] Yeah?

- You can help.

- [Bert] Yeah?

- You wanna know how?

- [Bert] Yeah.

- Snore.

Loud.

(Snoring loudly)

- Like that?

- [Malcolm] Yeah, just like that.

- Yeah.

- [Malcolm] Just like that.

(Laughing)

(sighing)

- Oh god.

(Sighing)

Oh, that kid.

- Ah!

(Screaming)

Oh, you!

You stop it now!

Or I'll put you to bed!

- Now that's the best offer I've had all day.

- You're impossible.

- How about incorrigible?

- That too.

Ooh, another little spoiled brat.

Why me?

Why do I get them all?

- 'Cause they love you, Linda.

(Dramatic synth music)

- Is that you, Cleopatra?

This is the men's ward.

Say goodnight to Marc Anthony.

(Laughing maniacally)

- But were I Brutus, and Brutus Anthony.

There, there would an Anthony would turn

the stones of Rome to rise in mutiny!

- Unrise, Mr. Higginbottom.

You're all alone now.

(Snoring)

No! Oh!

(Screaming)

(laughing)

Oh!

Oh! Oh! Oh!

(Laughing)

(muffled yelling)

(gasping)

(laughing)

(muffled yelling)

- Oh!

Oh! Oh!

Oh!

I'm going fast.

I have no regrets.

- Do you know the story about the boy who cried wolf?

- Are there any Indians in it?

- No.

Once upon a time there was a little boy

who lived in a village.

And his father gave him the job of watching the sheep.

And he said, "Son, if you ever see any wolves,

"you must yell wolf, wolf!

"And all the villagers will come to protect you."

So the first day the little boy was on the job,

he gets very, very bored.

And he says, I think I'll play a joke.

And he yells, "Wolf, wolf!"

And all the villagers come running with their weapons,

only to have the little boy going, "Ha, ha, ha!"

He was only playing a joke.

So the next day the little boy's back out there

protecting the sheep,

and what do you think he does?

He gets bored again and he yells, "Wolf, wolf!"

And the villagers come from all over,

only to have the little boy laugh in their face.

So the third day

the wolf really came.

And just when he was ready to pounce on the little boy,

the little boy yelled, "Wolf, wolf!"

And none of the villagers came to help him.

And the wolf ate the little boy.

He, the wolf ate the little boy all up.

Do you understand what I'm trying to say?

- Yes, I understand, Linda.

- Good.

- Wolf, wolf!

(Door creaking)

- Excuse me, nurse.

May I see your ID, please?

- [Malcolm] Why, certainly, officer.

(Punch smacking)

(dramatic strings music)

(sighing)

(chair cracking) (screaming)

(explosion booming)

(screaming)

- Oh, that little monster.

(Phone ringing)

Hello?

- Hi, honey.

It's me.

How is your evening?

- Oh, awful.

I've got a mean, little kid here

that's giving me a bad time.

- Mmm, lock him in his room.

- He'd escape.

He's Houdini Junior.

- What do you mean?

- Tricks, costumes, practical jokes.

I mean, his parents must've given him

carte blanche at the magic store.

- Yeah.

You'll be able to handle it.

Look, ah, I gotta go.

I'll see you after the show, okay?

- I've got my own show going on here.

(Doorknocker knocking)

(gasping)

Oh, gotta go.

More goblins.

- I love you.

- I love you, too.

Break a leg, huh?

(Dramatic strings music)

(phone ringing)

Hello?

Hello?

Hello?

Damn kid.

Ah!

Christopher!

(Dramatic music)

(screaming)

(dramatic music)

(water splashing)

(gasping)

(whimpering)

(screaming)

(gasping)

(sobbing)

- Thanks for the kiss, baby.

- Oh! Ah! Ah!

- You wouldn't hit a kid, would you?

(Sobbing)

(screaming)

- Why are the lights on if nobody's home?

- Yeah, we oughta tip over their garbage cans.

(Dramatic music)

(gun firing)

- Shoot yourself again, Christopher.

(Phone ringing)

Hello?

Hello?

(Suspenseful music)

Get off that phone.

- See this knife?

(Grunting)

Hey!

Take off my mother's nightgown.

- Oh, shut up!

- Mmm.

- Hello?

- You wanna loan me a little money

to go back where I come from?

- Take it, take it, take it, go.

Here, here, here, take it.

Take more, take more, take more, go.

(Laughing)

- Do you remember me?

- Yo lady, is this your car over here?

- Huh?

- The car.

- No.

No, no.

- Hey, lady.

- Ah!

Help! Help!

My finger!

Help!

Help, my finger!

My finger!

- Oh no, Christopher.

Christopher.

I'm gonna lock you in your room, you little monster.

- No locks on my doors.

Sorry.

(Gasping)

- You've got a basement.

- No.

- You must have a rocket I could shoot you off

into outer space.

- I've got a rocket, but you can't have it.

(Phone ringing)

- We'll see about that, buster.

I'll deal with you in a minute.

Just a minute, please.

(Doorknocker knocking)

- [Kids] Trick or treat!

(Door slamming)

- Boy, that lady's crazy.

- Yeah, looks like she might've seen a ghost.

(Laughing)

- Yeah?

- I'm coming home

to take care of you, darling.

- Christopher!

I've had enough of this!

(Phone slamming)

(suspenseful music)

(pinball machine clicking)

- Hello, Linda.

(Suspenseful music)

(blade clattering) (screaming)

(suspenseful music)

(dramatic music)

I want to suck your blood.

- Christopher, will you please stay off the telephone.

- I wasn't on the phone.

- How can I believe you?

You can even disguise your voice.

- [Man] Hold up.

I gotta a homey.

- Hi, sweetheart.

Hi.

- Don't talk to me.

- Oh, don't be so shy.

- I don't like to be touched.

- Oh, now, now.

Would you like to go have a little drinkey-poo, maybe?

- Oh, no, I, I've--

- What do you say?

Just you and I.

- No thank you.

- What, just you and I.

- No, no, I don't want to drink.

- Come, drink some alcohol.

Oh, just a little, maybe a drink.

You and I together, what do you say?

- Just maybe a little bit.

- Hey!

(Upbeat lounge music)

- I want to check on Christopher.

(Phone ringing)

- Hello again.

- Hello again?

Linda, this is Joan.

Is everything all right?

- No.

- What do you mean?

- Your son is a holy terror.

He committed suicide about four times.

He tried to drown me.

He set off explosions.

He had me chase him all over the house.

He played tricks on me.

- Well, dear.

Christopher is an amateur magician.

- Yes, well I don't want to be the magician's stooge.

- Oh, he's perfectly harmless.

- Oh, and some screwball keeps calling me on the phone.

Is the kid a ventriloquist, too?

- Well, he might be. (Chuckles)

Did he wreck the house?

- No, but that's probably next.

- Oh, don't worry, dear.

- You know, you shouldn't buy your son

everything he wants.

- Oh, I believe more harm can be done

by denying the creative mind.

Surely you can understand that, Linda.

- Then maybe you oughta sign him up with the circus.

- Well, goodnight.

- Goodnight.

- Christopher is being a perfect angel.

(Crickets chirping)

(bell ringing)

(doorknocker knocking)

(door creaking)

(doorknocker knocking)

(door creaking)

(doorknocker knocking)

(crickets chirping)

(door slamming)

(doorknocker knocking)

- Trick or treat!

(Door slamming)

- Okay, there you are.

A refill, ma'am.

And I'll be right back.

- Thank you.

(Coughing)

Thank you.

(Nails screeching)

- Christopher!

You get in this house right away!

(Doorknocker knocking)

(doorbell ringing)

- Trick or treat!

- Aren't you too old to be trick-or-treating?

- We're drunk.

- Wait, wait, wait, now.

Okay, okay, you got it.

- Come on.

- Here you go, yeah, yeah. - Oh, yeah.

- [Linda] Okay, there you go, here you go.

No, that's okay.

(Laughing)

- Why don't you come with us?

- Later, okay?

Bye.

Oh, bye.

- [Young Man] Trick or treat.

- See you later.

- [Young Man] Bye bye.

(Phone ringing)

- Oh yeah?

Well the same to you, jerk off!

(Phone slamming)

(screaming)

- Come on.

- Hey, take it easy, take it easy.

- Hey, there's nothing in this.

- I got something.

- You drank it, oh.

- I'll go get some.

Hey.

- Why don't you get us another bottle?

- Get me some.

- Get us another bottle.

- Give me some money, give me some money, man.

- It's right down at the co,

I'll give you some money.

I'm gonna give you.

- I got some money too, you know.

- Quarter.

I'm gonna give you 40, 42 cents.

- You give me 42 cents?

- 42 cents.

- You don't get as much.

- I probably don't.

- I'll see you later, huh?

- Where you goin'?

- [Man] Right around the corner.

(Change rattling)

- Cha.

Cha-ching.

- [Malcolm] Hi, buddy.

- Hey, lady.

You shouldn't be down here.

- Take off your clothes.

- What?

- Take off your clothes.

- What are you gonna do?

Rape me?

- [Malcolm] Take 'em off now.

Shut up.

Just take your clothes off.

- You got it.

- Come on, take 'em off.

(Laughing)

- Well, hi, honey!

(Punch smacking)

Hey, take it easy.

- [Malcolm] Shut up, take your clothes off!

- What are you gonna--

- Shut up!

Take 'em off quick!

Quick!

- [Man] I'm doin' it, I'm doin' it.

- Back it up.

Not you, stupid!

- My shoes.

- [Malcolm] I want everything taken off.

- Everything?

- [Malcolm] Everything!

- Give her it.

- [Malcolm] Take it off!

- [Man] Give her all your clothes.

- [Man] You want the shoes?

- Yeah, everything!

Come on, take it off.

Come on, take 'em off!

- [Man] Jesus.

- Just take 'em off.

You shut up!

- Sorry, sorry.

- You want my underwear?

- Take 'em off!

Hurry up, come on!

What, you never seen tits before?

Take 'em off!

All of 'em!

Take everything, everything off.

Aw, shut up.

Just back it off.

(Projector rattling)

- The blood really looks fake.

- Fake or not, these horror pictures give me the willies.

- It's only a movie, Andrea.

- Look, Connie, I love movies.

I love editing.

I love making movies more than I love eating.

But these horror movies,

they make me scared to drive home alone at night.

- I know what you mean.

They don't exactly turn me on.

- Do you think people will ever get tired

of these films?

- Nope.

I think people are always interested in

the latest monster that will pop up

or how much more blood can be spilled

or how many more guts can be whipped out.

- And the producers will keep pourin' 'em out.

- Yup.

How's that scene coming along?

- Here, come take a look at it.

Tell me what you think.

(Projector rattling)

(laughing maniacally)

- Yes, the arm is well-connected.

Glove.

Nurse, give me head.

- The head?

- Yes, the head!

(Machine pulsing)

- Here's the head, Doctor.

- Thank you, nurse.

Do those nerves look okay to you?

- No, no.

- Carotid artery look okay to you?

- [Woman] Awful.

- Pick up the sheet.

(Machine pulsing)

You're in my light.

(Machine pulsing)

And now you who have for so long

been bound to the most narrow

and materialistic views,

you who have denied the virtue of

transcendental medicine,

you who have derided your superior,

behold!

- The brain.

- What?

(Machine pulsing)

Oh, the brain.

Yes, I forgot.

(Laughing maniacally)

I've done it!

Quick, the brain!

- Dah.

(Laughing maniacally)

Dah.

- You know, it works.

- You think so?

- I think it's brilliant.

I mean, this movie's gonna be made in this editing room.

- You know, it's obvious those jerks

don't know what they're doing.

- Like that segue you did in the second reel

in the montage sequence?

Sure genius!

- And that dumb director's gonna get all the credit!

- Exactly.

- We make the pictures

right here.

- You're damn right.

(Phone ringing)

Hello.

Just a minute.

It's Linda.

- Oh.

Hi, Linda.

- Hi, how is everything going?

- Well, we're almost done with

the rough cut of The Monster Strikes.

- Oh great.

Listen, I talked to my agent tonight

and he needs that scene I did by tomorrow morning.

Did you transfer it to video?

- I sure did and it's right here.

Why, wanna come by and get it?

- Well, the problem is I'm babysitting

and I can't really leave the house.

- Well, where are you?

- I'm in the Wilshire District.

- Well, that's right next to my hairdresser

and I'm going there so I'll drop it by to you.

No problem.

- Oh, could you?

I was hoping you would.

- What's the address?

- [Kids] Trick or treat.

- [Linda] Ah! (Laughing)

Here you go, guys.

Have fun.

Happy Halloween.

- [Kid] Thank you.

(Sighing)

(static crackling)

- [Newsman] Today's sports with Stu coming up next.

- Thank you, John.

A dangerous lunatic, Malcolm O'Keefe,

ex-millionaire industrialist,

has escaped from Western State Hospital.

An all points bulletin by the police is out tonight.

I'm here at Western State Hospital tonight

to talk with Nurse Almeda.

- Reeves. - Reeves.

- It was vicious and savage attack.

The work of a maniac.

He jumped me as I leaned to tuck him in.

He threw me on the bed

and then jumped on top of me

and put it in my mouth.

- Ah, put the gag in your mouth, you mean.

- Yes, yes, he put this in my mouth

and I couldn't cry out.

He, he tied me up and took off all my clothes.

I've never been so humiliated.

- Well now, he--

- I tried to escape once and they knocked my teeth out.

- Sit down, would you?

- Now Malcolm O'Keefe, who was committed

to this institution many years ago

has just been recently made a trustee.

Isn't that right?

- We. - Yes.

- We are not crazy.

- He was normally a nice man.

- Yeah, we don't belong here.

- Oh, shut up, you're all crazy.

- Thank you very much, Nurse Reeves.

- [Almeda] Oh, get down!

- And right now we'd like to show you

a picture of the escaped patient.

And if any of you out there have any information

with regard to this man.

- [Man] We're not!

- Please call the Western State Hospital.

- [Man] Crazy.

- Or your local police.

- [Man] Well, we're not crazy.

- When he jumped me, when he jumped me

I found, I found that he,

he responded to me in a way that no man ever has.

- [Malcolm] I have to go to Wilshire, near Labrea.

- You wanna go to Wilshire-Labrea?

That's 35 cent, boy.

Sit down.

(Thudding) (gasping)

(door creaking)

(thudding)

(playful suspense music)

- Are you here, kid?

(Door slamming)

Christopher!

(Glass shattering)

All right.

That's two, little creep.

(Screaming)

No! Stop.

All right, inside the house.

I've had it with you and I'm gonna tie you up in your bed.

- I'll escape.

- Look, just stop.

Please?

I'm tired.

Why don't you take a break?

Leave me alone.

Why don't you dress up like the other kids

and go around the neighborhood?

You might get yourself some poison candy.

- I heard what you said!

That wasn't very nice!

- You're right.

I don't know why I'd have such a thought.

- I'm a cannibal and I bring you human flesh

to eat at night.

- You're probably a midget.

(Door slamming)

- I wonder if I should put her in a zigzag box.

Or saw her in half.

(Train clicking)

(knocking)

- Linda?

Linda?

(Suspenseful music)

Linda!

Linda!

(Suspenseful music)

Linda, it's Andrea.

Where are you?

I've got your tape.

(Suspenseful music)

(sighing)

(suspenseful music)

Magic tricks.

(Suspenseful music)

(rustling)

(suspenseful music)

(cat meowing)

Linda?

Are you playing some kind of joke on me for Halloween?

Well it isn't very funny.

Now say something.

- [Malcolm] Yoo-hoo.

(Suspenseful music)

(rustling)

Linda, I hear you.

(Clattering)

(wood creaking)

(soft clicking)

(sighing)

Ah! (Dramatic music)

(gasping) (grunting)

(groaning)

- You're not Joan.

Stupid!

(Screaming)

- Nice try, Linda.

Now you're gettin' the hang of it.

- Hmm-hmm.

(Dramatic music)

(cat meowing)

(screaming)

- Can I have my cat back, please?

- Go to your room!

- Hey!

How about you pouring me a glass of that wine?

(Phone ringing)

- Screw off!

- Linda?

- Oh, Brett.

I'm sorry.

- What are you so mad about?

- Obscene phone calls.

Rats, cats.

You name it.

- Well, I wish I was there with you.

- Oh, it's all right.

I found the wine.

- You're getting obscene phone calls?

- Mmm-hmm, a few.

Some weirdo keeps calling and tells me

he's coming over here.

- Maybe, ah, maybe you should call the police.

- Oh, right.

You know, I never thought of that.

How's the play going?

- Oh.

Desdemona's wig slipped a little bit,

but other than that it's going great.

It's a great audience.

- Well, they all got in free, didn't they?

- Yeah, yeah, they got in free,

but they're good, you know?

I mean, they're good.

(Bell tolling)

Oh, I gotta go, I gotta go!

I'll talk to you, bye!

I gotta go!

- Forget her!

- Hello, police?

I'd like to report a strange man who's been calling.

What?

Well, he's threatening to come over

to the house where I am.

- [Officer] Well, there's nothing we can do

until he actually shows up.

We can't station a man out at your house.

We get a hundred of these calls every night.

Just keep your door locked, lady.

- Oh, yes, I understand.

Thank you.

(Squeaking)

(wind howling) (thunder clapping)

(eerie screaming) (spooky oohing)

(maniacal laughing)

(wind howling)

(eerie screaming)

The little practical joker.

(Wind howling)

(eerie screaming)

- Trick or treat! - Trick or treat!

- [Linda] Here you go.

Happy Halloween.

- Thank you.

Where's Christopher?

- Oh, he's upstairs playing.

- I have some paper.

- Probably making a bomb.

What?

- There's some paper to me.

- Oh, here, I'll give you some more.

There you go.

How's that?

- Let's go.

(Laughing)

- Thank you, bye!

Oh, well, what's the matter, darling?

Got a sore throat?

Well, get a good night's sleep.

(Suspenseful music)

- I'm home, Joan.

- Christopher, I told you not to--

- Don't look at me!

I've changed.

I can see you haven't changed.

I'll bet you're surprised to see me back here

in my home.

You've moved all my things around.

It doesn't matter.

I have a little thank-you for you.

For all the misery that you put into my life.

Clever of you, Joan.

Very, very clever the way you put me out of the picture

as soon as you were tired of me.

Except, except

I have a little punishment

for you for what you've done to me.

- Why don't you--

- Shut up!

Shut up.

I'll do the talking, okay?

Huh?

Yeah.

It's time for you to suffer.

I loved you, Joan.

And look what you did to my life.

You destroyed it.

- I--

- Now I hate you.

Do you hate me?

Oh, come on, yes, you do.

'Cause you do, you hate me don't you?

- Stop!

(Dramatic music)

(screaming) (maniacal laughing)

(dramatic music)

(screaming)

(dog barking in background)

(can clattering) (screaming)

(dramatic music)

(grunting)

- Oh! Oh!

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Why?

- Ah!

(Suspenseful music)

(screaming)

(dramatic music)

(keys jangling)

(engine cranking)

(maniacal laughing)

- Where are you going?

On a little trip, huh?

(Engine cranking)

(maniacal laughing)

You can't go anywhere, huh?

(Engine cranking)

(screaming)

(grunting)

Are you going on a little expedition?

(Maniacal laughing)

Won't start, huh?

It won't!

(Screaming)

Going on a little trip, are ya?

(Maniacal laughing)

(dramatic music)

(screaming)

- Hello, police?

(Door thudding)

(screaming)

(panicked gasping and breathing)

- I must've dozed off.

Is it still Halloween?

- Somebody's in the house.

- A ghost?

- [Linda] A killer!

- You mean the guy with the big knife.

- Maybe one more trick.

How does this thing work?

- Usually magicians never tell a secret.

- Oh, ssh!

Come on, help me move it out.

(Dog barking in background)

- Uh, unclip those clips

and take off that red thing.

- Can this thing really cut?

Ah! (Blade clattering)

Uh, okay.

Oh, I wish this gun was real.

Raise the blade.

That's good.

That's real good.

Okay.

(Dog barking in background)

He's coming.

Can you hear him?

(Doorknob rattling)

(loud thudding)

I don't hear him anymore.

Do you hear him?

I don't hear him anymore.

Where is he?

(Screaming)

Oh! No!

Now!

(Screaming)

(grunting)

(coughing)

- I'm sorry for what I did to you, Linda.

I promise I won't do it anymore.

No more tricks.

- It's all right.

Come with me.

I have to call the police.

(Door clattering)

(crying)

Hello, police?

I'd like to report a death.

(Screaming)

(dramatic music)

- [Kids] Trick or treat!

* If you need someone to love

* To get you through another day *

* I'm the one you're thinking of *

* I will make him pay

* For the things that he's done *

* And you can tell him I'm gonna give you *

* Help is on the way

* I will love you

* Help is on the way

* I'll never hurt you

* Help is on the way

* Help is on the way

* Mustn't cry

* I will dry your tears

* We will cut him down to size

* If it takes a hundred years

* He can't do things he do

* And you can tell him I'm going to hit him *

* Help is on the way

* I will love you

* Help is on the way

* I won't desert you

* Help is on the way

* Uh, oh, oh

* Help is on the way

* All my lovin', all my kissin' *

* Give all my lovin' to you

* Help is on the way

* Yes it is now

* Help is on the way

* Ow, ow

* Help is on the way