Original subtitles

Miss Krait? What a coincidence to see you here.

If these Serpents are as dangerous as you say they are,

we have to be prepared.

It's another puzzle.

That's new.

Grandad says the Egyptian legends are all true.

Aapep is trapped inside the Great Pyramid.

The Pyramidion is holding the key.

This is the most dangerous artefact on the planet.

RATTLING

♪ ..to you

♪ Happy birthday to you

♪ Happy birthday, dear Theo

♪ Happy birthday to... ♪

ECHOING: You shouldn't have.

You really shouldn't have.

WORRIED: Dad?

No!

Grandad, what should we do?

Wakey, wakey, rise and shine.

Happy birthday.

Sorry, Henry, I've got stuff to do.

Great.

Dear heavens, Clive.

Perhaps you should leave the decorating to

the less aesthetically challenged.

As you wish, your ladyship.

Oh!

SHE STAMMERS

Let me help you with that. Oh, thank you, my dear.

I'm rather looking forward to today.

Your decision to keep Theodosia's birthday celebrations

a low-key affair does seem wise.

A day without any pressures will do Theo the world of good.

It's been so hard for Theo not having her mum and dad around.

All she needs is a fun celebration for her and her friends.

I'm sure. And in any event,

one wonders whether society would be quite ready for Theodosia.

Despite your good work, she can still be worryingly wilful.

There we go. Oh.

Carry on, my dear.

DOOR OPENS

Who's ready to...

..party?

She's been at this ages.

Safiya's here now - time to put the book down.

Sorry, look, no can do.

The Pyramidion contains the key to releasing Aapep,

you know, the actual Aapep,

Aapep as in the evil spirit of all darkness and destruction

who even Ra himself can't defeat.

Thank you, Encyclopaedia Dramatica.

SAFIYA LAUGHS

We have to hide it. Everything.

I need to seal Grandad's secret room,

the journal, the Pyramidion, everything.

The clue's in the name, "secret room".

No-one else even knows about it.

Yes, but everyone at Will's magic show saw

the Pyramidion.

What if they end up connecting it to me or the museum?

But I thought no-one could open the last Pyramidion anyway.

It's got that weird lock thing.

Besides, there's no way Granny'll let you duck out of the party.

IMITATING GRANNY: "Theodosia.

"This event has been arranged for you, at no little inconvenience."

OK, I'm in.

Excellent.

Happy birthday to the smartest, funniest person I know.

Hang on, my birthday's not today.

Thank you, Henry.

No really, thank you.

CAMEL BRAYS

I wonder what Theo's up to? Having fun?

It feels awful, missing her birthday.

Remember last year's practice dig in the garden?

THEY CHUCKLE

She was so eager to get prepped for the Valley of the Kings.

Following in her mother's footsteps.

So much has changed since then.

Our little girl's growing up.

What do you think of this?

I don't recognise the symbol.

This one? Hmm.

Yes, that's one of Dad's.

It means "empty space".

And where there's an empty space...

There's a potential chamber.

Ah. Perfect timing.

You've found something?

We think so. Well, we hope so.

How wonderful.

I call it the Portapage. Smart, huh?

Yeah, I hear wearing

a book shelf is totally the big new look.

It's brilliant.

I can read and get ready at the same time.

Here. Do mine.

Oh, yeah, let me just bookmark this page quickly.

If I can adapt the locking spell...

Oh, wow.

Cute, right? I kind of wanted me to have it,

but it's a great colour for you and it is your birthday.

Well, Safiya, I can't accept this - it's too much!

Nuh-uh!

Life may not be perfect but your outfit can be.

Thank you.

I'll bet Will will love it too.

Do you think? Do you think he'll even come?

SHE SIGHS I should have been at the show.

He'll come.

I'll leave you two to play dress-up.

Whatever. I can still kick your butt any day.

And look stunning doing it.

Thank you.

Is young Will around?

I wanted to speak to him last night, but things got a little...

Terrifying?

Great to see such ambition.

He's at a party,

at the Museum of Legends and Antiquities.

My invite must've got lost in the post.

Ah, so that's where he got those props.

I did wonder. Such a magical performance.

Definitely.

Just a pity it made all my customers disappear.

Yeah.

Clive,

could you find some chairs for our musicians?

Fetch some chairs? I'll give her chairs...

It's a party. Feel free to play fast and loud.

We may run into some interference from my great-aunt -

just leave her to me.

Hear me, Ancients. Thoth, God of wisdom,

grant me the protection of the fields of Aaru.

SHE SIGHS

There. See? Apparently, this is Theo's idea of birthday fun.

It's fine, Saf, I can party and save the world at the same time.

Hi, Will. You... you came.

You look... amazing.

You know, I should really fix my hair before the party.

Be in the garden in ten?

Sure. Yeah.

SAFIYA: Honestly, those two.

It's like Romeo and Juliet but played by clowns.

Only even clowns would have kissed by now.

I got you this.

Thanks.

Oh!

Oh, it's like the nameplate for Vincent's house.

And that's my name!

In hieroglyphs!

Safiya helped me with that, so...

It's beautiful.

Thank you, Will. Can you...? Me? Yeah.

I'd like that.

Happy birthday, by the way.

Thank you.

There we go.

So, should we look for some safe props for your next show?

About that. I've been thinking. I'm not sure magic's for me.

Will, it IS you. You love it.

It's not exactly practical, is it? Especially after yesterday.

See, I've got this job at the laundry.

The laundry? Hey, it's reliable, and it pays well.

Like, hard work and everything

but battling tough stains is easier than duelling deities.

I know I should've been there. I'm sorry.

I could've stopped it and...

Come on, you're missing your party.

Yeah, I actually need get this stuff back up to my room.

Parties, spell books and Granny is never a good mix.

CLOCK CHIMES

Punctuality is not just about being on time,

it's about respecting others.

Oh. Better late than not fabulous.

Oh.

Very modern.

But delightful, quite delightful.

A toast, I think.

15. Good heavens.

Let's not concern ourselves with age,

it's merely the number of years

the world has been enjoying us.

Luckily, you have the perfect person to guide you on your journey.

To Theodosia.

ALL: To Theo.

Thank you for doing this for me, Nigella.

You're officially the best cousin ever. Ditto.

Oh! Your parents left you a little something.

What could it be?

Fancy wrapping.

The suspense is too much.

SHE GASPS

It's a new hieroglyph dictionary! Look.

Yeah, yeah, bird, eye, squiggly line, beetle, we get it.

I wish Mum and Dad were here.

They are in spirit, I assure you.

Come on, let's get the party started. To the dance floor!

To the dance floor!

It should be right through here.

Nearly there.

Ah.

MAN GRUNTS

That's it. That's it.

What can you see?

Wonderful things.

Ready to hit the dance floor?

Better get in quick before Granny requests a waltz.

Why don't you ask Will?

Wasn't he supposed to ask me first?

You're so Victorian sometimes!

OK, well, maybe he doesn't even want to.

I'm a rubbish friend.

I wasn't even there for him when he needed me.

Are you thirsty? There's rose lemonade.

Yeah. Great. Thanks.

You know this is supposed to be a party?

Yeah. Sorry.

Theo really cares about you.

It's complicated. It doesn't need to be.

Just go over there and ask her to dance. You'll see.

You think so?

I know so.

What is this alleged music?

Th-the lady requested...

And now I am requesting that you get Bach to business.

Oh. Are you part of the entertainment?

No, but...

Roses are red.

And violets...

- ..are blue. - SHE GASPS

It's gone. I know, isn't it marvellous?

No, my flute. It's... Where did it...?

Was this your doing? No, I assure you.

Oh. I had it a moment ago. Oh, dear.

Where is it? It's disappeared.

Where did you have it last?

He's coming, he's coming. It's going to be OK.

OK, smile.

May I have this dance?

This would work so much better with actual music.

I should've been there for you yesterday, really. You know,

the Pyramidion's important, but so are you.

Can we agree,

the most important thing isn't what happened or what might've happened,

OK?

What's important is that right here,

right now, we're together.

Agreed.

I'm glad Nigella talked me into this.

Oh, so you had to be talked into it, then? Did you?

Look, it's a tough job, but somebody had to do it.

Yeah, OK.

Found it!

That's not mine.

Could you just make do... for now?

I could try.

Well done, dear.

I must say, you've done a wonderful job.

It's an entirely appropriate affair.

Thank you.

I'm glad we've had this time together.

I was always fond of you, you know, such a sensible girl.

Most unfortunate, what happened to your father.

Yes. Unfortunate.

My own nephew, a rogue!

Thank goodness you're nothing like him.

Theodosia and Henry are lucky to have you here.

You're so kind, Great-Aunt. Shall we fetch the cake?

Yes, indeed. Something chocolaty, I hope.

Excuse the interruption.

Mr Devenham. What are you doing here?

I wanted to congratulate you on your show.

Astonishing effects.

You must tell me how you did them.

Well...

And I loved all the Egyptian stuff,

especially that strange pyramid. Oh, yes.

You must show it to me sometime. Let's talk, after the dancing.

Wow. Well,

I guess you really do have a magical future. Now, let's dance.

What is this? A waltz?

Yeah. It's easy. OK. Hand here.

And I'm going to put my hand here, on your shoulder.

OK, now follow my feet. This one first, yeah? No. My back.

What do you say, Henry, ready to dance?

Nah, I've got two left feet.

Just style it out. Dance like no-one's watching.

Or pointing or laughing.

Am I doing it right? Yeah.

Neville Devenham liked my magic.

THE Neville Devenham. I know, you should go after him.

No, no. There's plenty of time for that.

Right now I'm enjoying dancing with you.

Extraordinary.

Amazing.

The find of the century.

Your dad would be so proud.

Yes. I really think he would.

Aapep's nightly battles with Ra.

Incredible persistence.

4,000 years and counting.

Oh, you've done so well.

Today's been such an extraordinary day for discoveries.

This obelisk was uncovered in one of the air shafts.

Such an intense and captivating luminescence.

It's mesmerising, isn't it?

VOICE SLOWS: Almost hypnotic.

SHE SNAPS HER FINGERS

The time is nigh, Aapep. Chaos is coming.

LOW RUMBLING

I thought you couldn't dance?

This song's different somehow.

Even Clive's dancing!

I didn't know think he had it in him. I'm not sure he does.

What'll your next show be about? Not sure. If Devenham the Magician's

into my magic, then maybe I should stick to magic?

He did seem interested, didn't he? In the Pyramidion in particular.

I guess.

How did he know you were here?

I guess Artie must've told him.

Where is he? You know, we should find him,

ask him a few questions.

OK.

OK, Will, it's OK. You can let go.

I'm not. Come on, now Will. Let... It's not me.

What's happening?

Is this wrong? Oh, no. I see magic.

PACE QUICKENS

Stop! Please!

No can do. We're in the groove.

Got to go with the flow.

The flute. The flute has magic. We can't stop dancing.

Neither can we. Do something, Theo. My feet are hurting. OK.

Neville Devenham came to see Will... Wow. Amazing.

No, I think he used magic to distract us all.

The Pyramidion.

OK, you two have to find him and stop him.

What are we supposed to do, shimmy him into submission?

You'll think of something.

OK, we need to go upstairs and find a reversal spell.

OK.

Take a left. All right.

My left, not your left! Sorry.

What's that noise?

You think you can just waltz in here and put a spell on us?

I don't know what you're talking about. What on earth is going on?

Show us your wrists. What? Why?

Grab him. Get this dancing tin can off me!

No way, snake. Grab him.

Ever feel like you're taking two steps forward and one step back?

This isn't funny, Will. Tell me about it.

My magic career's been resurrected, then destroyed in five minutes.

OK, ready? OK. Now.

The amulet. Argh!

Why doesn't this dress have pockets?

Erm... OK, do as I do.

Oh, OK.

OK. Hear me, Ancients. Hathor, mother of salutations,

lady of delight,

grant me the serenity of Ma'at, daughter of Ra.

OK. OK.

Ready?

MUSIC STOPS ABRUPTLY

Everyone's a critic.

What... What just happened?

Looks like the party's over.

Ah! Watch it!

No tattoo. He's clean.

Never in my life!

You will stay for... cake?

You let him go? He's not a Serpent.

Wait, what? He looked mad. Was he mad?

Maybe a little.

He was my big break, my only chance.

Someone cast that spell. Someone from inside. Sh!

Someone from inside the museum.

We have to get to the secret room.

Another chamber for you to explore.

Breathe easy.

There's not a lot of air to go around.

Granny!

Hey, cuz, we need to talk.