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- Lina:You're going, and that's it.
- Russ: Oh, my God.
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I got your stupid vasectomy.
Isn't that enough?
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Lina: No. You've blown off three follow-up
appointments.
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Russ: I don't need a follow-up visit.
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- I know that it worked.
- Lina: How could you possibly know that?
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Russ: Because I... eyeballed it.
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- Lina: What?
- Russ: My stuff. It's practically clear.
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Seriously, you could store
contact lenses in it.
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Lina: I am moving on.
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I'm getting rid of all the baby stuff from
the garage.
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Do you think that's easy for me?
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Russ: Even that bassinet?
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Even the bassinet.
You need to move on, too.
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Russ: I just don't want to be
told that I have meaningless semen.
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Lina: If you want to get anywhere near
any of this...
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You're gonna have to take care
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of that.
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S01E06
Invisible Man
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sync and corrected by ninh
www.addic7ed.com
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- Russ: I thought you took lessons.
- Frankie: I'm still scared.
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(Frankie whimpers) Russ:
I want a refund, then.
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Get this on.
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Girl: What are you doing?
Everybody can see you.
24
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Girl 2: What's the big deal?
Nobody's here.
25
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(Indistinct chatter, laughter)
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Russ: Can I ask you something?
27
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- Am I invisible?
- Shepard: I don't know what that means.
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Lina: He's been upset because
some girls changed in front of him.
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- Shepard: Say what?
- AJ: Boobs or beaver?
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Russ: That's not the point.
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- Shepard: N-no, I-I'm gonna allow that.
- Russ: They didn't care what I saw.
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Shepard: Oh. Well, God bless you.
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AJ: No, no, no. I see... I see your
point, here. I mean, for all she knows,
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- you're-you're a rapist. You're a...
- Russ: Yeah.
35
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AJ:...sick, sexual maniac who
follows her home, studies her patterns.
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Maybe you borrow a uniform from an
old cop buddy who owes you a favor.
37
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"Is there a problem, officer?" Rag. Ether.
38
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Nightmare.
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Russ: Yeah, I... I think I-I was just
trying to say, like, I-I want women to feel
40
00:02:03,300 --> 00:02:06,494
uncomfortable changing around me.
Is that so much to ask?
41
00:02:06,514 --> 00:02:08,085
Lina: I'm uncomfortable changing
in front of you. (Phone ringing)
42
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- Shepard: Tammy. Mind if I...?
- Jess: Get it? No, please, get it. Yeah.
43
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Shepard: Hey, Tammy, what's up? Okay.
44
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Lina: Who's Tammy?
45
00:02:15,161 --> 00:02:18,325
Jess: Tammy is a musician that Shep
has been working with.
46
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Lina: So he's getting back into the
music business?
47
00:02:20,342 --> 00:02:21,419
Jess: I don't know.
48
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Maybe. It's just nice to see him,
uh, excited.
49
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It's a nice change from his super-intense
depression. And I just feel like it's so
50
00:02:29,552 --> 00:02:34,607
great to see him get off the couch
and go to work and... Put on pants.
51
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- Lina: Right.
- AJ: Pants are for losers.
52
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- You're wearing pants right now, dude.
- Lina: Yeah.
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AJ: Not up here.
54
00:02:41,739 --> 00:02:45,206
Shepard: Right. No, it's on ventura.
No, but come around the back.
55
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Right. And they can,
they can set up whenever they get there.
56
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Yeah, we'll all be there. All right. Great.
57
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All right, buddy. See you tomorrow.
Hey, just got some great
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00:02:53,758 --> 00:02:57,300
musicians for Tammy's session tomorrow.
It's gonna sound really, really good.
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00:02:57,320 --> 00:03:00,138
Jess: Do you know that
when you work, it makes me so hot?
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00:03:00,272 --> 00:03:03,214
Shepard: Really? How hot?
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Jess: Well, let's say
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probably about doggy-style hot.
63
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I-I don't want to put on the knee brace.
64
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Jess: Uh-huh.
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'Cause it pulls. You know, it's not...
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All right, doggy it is.
67
00:03:22,613 --> 00:03:23,933
Didi: Bowman?
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Russ: Hey.
Didi: You have a co-pay of $550.
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Russ: Sounds right.
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- Didi: You need to pay it.
- Russ: Totally.
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- Didi: Today.
- Russ: Oh. I don't... I don't have that
72
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- kind of cash on me.
- Didi: Oh, we take credit cards.
73
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Russ: Well, I have the cards, but...
not the credit.
74
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You're going to have to pay the
balance of this procedure.
75
00:03:45,792 --> 00:03:48,131
Russ: Yeah, I'll pay it. Just not today.
76
00:03:48,151 --> 00:03:50,769
Didi: Let's reschedule, then.
We'll get something on the books
77
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after the payment is all squared away.
78
00:03:54,232 --> 00:03:57,065
Russ: All right. Have a great day.
79
00:04:02,798 --> 00:04:08,773
Child: My name is Albert Einstein
and I was born in Germany in 1879.
80
00:04:08,907 --> 00:04:12,668
I developed the theory of relativity.
81
00:04:12,688 --> 00:04:15,114
Russ (Whispering): Look, it's not my
fault, okay? We tried. It's over.
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00:04:15,134 --> 00:04:17,439
Lina: Seriously? What is wrong with you?
83
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- Russ: I'm invisible?
- Lina: Here's what you're going to do.
84
00:04:19,842 --> 00:04:22,460
You're gonna go back in that office,
and write down that woman's name
85
00:04:22,480 --> 00:04:25,287
- and scare the shit out of her.
- Russ: How?
86
00:04:25,307 --> 00:04:26,858
Tell her that your wife
already sent the check
87
00:04:26,878 --> 00:04:28,374
and if they don't see you right away,
88
00:04:28,394 --> 00:04:30,605
that you're gonna stop payment on
it and let it go to collections.
89
00:04:30,625 --> 00:04:34,198
- Tell her that.
- Russ: You're getting pretty good at this.
90
00:04:34,218 --> 00:04:37,075
- Lina: No, being broke makes you crafty.
- Russ: So then why don't you come with me
91
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- and then you can do the talking.
- Lina: I can't.
92
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- I have to take the baby stuff today.
- Russ: Come on. I...
93
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Don't make me go back to that cock-butcher.
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00:04:43,655 --> 00:04:45,733
Father: You guys want to take this outside?
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Russ: I'm sorry. We're so sorry.
96
00:04:48,173 --> 00:04:51,710
- Lina (Whispers): Sorry.
- Russ: Your son looks great.
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- Lina: It's his daughter.
- Russ: It's your daughter.
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Look... she looks great.
99
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You're going back to the cock-butcher.
100
00:05:11,866 --> 00:05:15,569
Russ: Hey, I never got your name.
Didi: Didi.
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Russ: Oh, great name.
So, Didi, there was a mix-up before.
102
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Uh, it turns out my wife already
sent the check.
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Really?
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Russ: But if I don't see the doctor
right now, we're gonna cancel the payment.
105
00:05:27,237 --> 00:05:31,743
And then it will go to collections, Didi.
And they will call us and I will
106
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be forced to mention your name. Didi.
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So you'd better polish
your r�sum�.
108
00:05:39,375 --> 00:05:44,089
- Because you'll get fired.
- Didi: Why would I get fired?
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Russ: Because they'll call.
And they'll know.
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I don't know. I...
it made sense when my wife said it.
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00:05:54,217 --> 00:05:58,217
I just need to see the
doctor right now, okay?
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Hello? Didi... please?
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- Oh, what am I, invisible now?
- Doctor: Who says you're invisible?
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I see you standing right there, Mr. Bowman.
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Russ: Thank you, doctor.
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(Didi sighs)
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Lina: Bye-bye, baby shit. (Grunts)
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Hi. Whew. Lot of memories here.
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Employee: Okay, you just have to
estimate how much this stuff cost you.
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Lina: Um... my youth.
Every time I cough, I pee a little.
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Employee: I'll write down "$50."
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Lina: Can I ask you a question?
123
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- Who gets this stuff?
- Employee: Regular people.
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People who need it.
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Lina: Do you think that I could meet
the person who gets my stuff?
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00:07:01,840 --> 00:07:05,412
I'd love to put a face with a, you know...
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00:07:05,546 --> 00:07:08,693
Employee: Doesn't really work like that.
(Gasps)
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Lina: I think I'm gonna need a minute.
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- Shepard: She'll be here soon.
- Well, how long do you have the studio?
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Shepard: I'm... by the hour.
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- Jess (Chuckling): Okay.
- Shepard: So whenever she gets here,
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we'll... that's when we'll go.
(Phone rings) Oh, hey, could be her.
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And it is. Hey. What's up?
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Jess: Sorry. (Chuckles) Trust me,
this is worth it. She's really hot.
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She has the talent of a much uglier girl.
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Shepard: That's...
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Well, listen, that's your call.
You-you do what you guys need. Uh-huh.
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"Oh, that's all right. So, you feel
better?" She says, "no, 'cause I've been
139
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throwing up. I've been throwing
up for the last couple of days."
140
00:07:52,979 --> 00:07:55,720
- Jess: Uh-huh.
- So I said, "hey, what are you, pregnant?"
141
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- Guess what.
- Jess: No. She's pregnant?
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Shepard: She's pregnant. She and
her boyfriend are gonna take the kid.
143
00:08:02,923 --> 00:08:05,958
They're gonna raise the kid in Iowa.
So they're going to Iowa.
144
00:08:05,978 --> 00:08:09,579
- Jess: That's gonna ruin her career.
- Shepard: What do you want me to do?
145
00:08:09,599 --> 00:08:11,424
Jess: Oh, my God,
you know what you need to do.
146
00:08:11,444 --> 00:08:13,794
Shepard: No, I don't. I don't know what I
need to do.
147
00:08:13,814 --> 00:08:16,052
Jess: Tell her to get rid of it.
148
00:08:16,499 --> 00:08:18,676
Shepard: The baby. Get rid of the...
That's what I should tell her?
149
00:08:18,696 --> 00:08:20,587
Jess: Yeah, look at how happy you are.
150
00:08:20,607 --> 00:08:22,858
You love working with this girl.
151
00:08:22,878 --> 00:08:24,427
- Shepard: I didn't love it.
- Jess: Yes, you did,
152
00:08:24,447 --> 00:08:25,948
- and you haven't... you...
- Shepard: It was fun, it was fun.
153
00:08:25,968 --> 00:08:28,554
Jess: Oh, my God, you haven't been
this happy since you left the label.
154
00:08:28,574 --> 00:08:30,897
All right, she's a good singer; I was
trying to help her out, but it's over.
155
00:08:30,917 --> 00:08:32,562
- Jess: No.
- Shepard: So that's okay. It's over.
156
00:08:32,582 --> 00:08:34,063
- Jess: Don't just do that.
- Shepard: Now it's over.
157
00:08:34,083 --> 00:08:36,930
Jess: Tell her about Liz Phair's abortion.
158
00:08:37,128 --> 00:08:38,605
I don't know what you're saying now.
159
00:08:38,625 --> 00:08:42,882
Tell her that right before Liz Phair was,
like, about to break out, she got pregnant,
160
00:08:42,902 --> 00:08:44,664
but then you talked about it,
161
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and you arranged for her to get an
abortion, and then nine months later...
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00:08:49,132 --> 00:08:52,496
(Blows raspberry)
You know, she's a hit
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00:08:52,516 --> 00:08:54,601
instead of a mother. (Chuckles)
164
00:08:54,849 --> 00:08:56,804
- Shepard: That never happened.
- Jess: That-that... just, PJ Harvey then,
165
00:08:56,824 --> 00:08:59,942
- if that makes more sense to you.
- I never met PJ Harvey, none of...
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00:08:59,962 --> 00:09:01,611
Jess: She probably
doesn't even know who that is, either.
167
00:09:01,631 --> 00:09:03,101
She'll be embarrassed to ask.
168
00:09:03,121 --> 00:09:05,016
Okay, what is wrong with you?
These... this is crazy.
169
00:09:05,036 --> 00:09:06,766
- Jess: Nothing is wrong with me.
- Shepard: There's nothing to say to her.
170
00:09:06,786 --> 00:09:09,608
She wants... it's her life.
It's her life, so she...
171
00:09:09,628 --> 00:09:12,354
Jess: Tell her that having kids is gonna
ruin her life.
172
00:09:12,374 --> 00:09:15,151
So our little baby boy
is ruining your life?
173
00:09:15,171 --> 00:09:18,391
Jess: No, he's not ruining my...
you're ruining my life.
174
00:09:18,652 --> 00:09:19,967
- Shepard: Okay.
- Jess: Don't do this.
175
00:09:19,987 --> 00:09:21,891
I know what you're thinking,
and that's, you know...
176
00:09:21,911 --> 00:09:24,204
- Shepard: Really? What am I thinking?
- You need to do it, do your thing, fine.
177
00:09:24,224 --> 00:09:25,499
Shepard: Can I just say,
178
00:09:25,519 --> 00:09:28,318
a lot of the shit that comes out of
your mouth cannot go back in.
179
00:09:28,338 --> 00:09:32,703
Jess: You could just get on the phone and
just, like, talk to her is all I'm saying.
180
00:09:32,723 --> 00:09:33,758
Shepard: You know what?
181
00:09:33,778 --> 00:09:35,354
Jess: You could just put in the effort
and do that.
182
00:09:35,374 --> 00:09:36,414
I'm gonna talk to her, okay.
183
00:09:36,434 --> 00:09:41,079
Try-try to not talk now. Do me that favor.
184
00:09:46,374 --> 00:09:50,428
Doctor: Okay, let's see. Mm-hmm.
Well, the good news is,
185
00:09:50,448 --> 00:09:53,804
the incision healed nicely.
Everything looks perfectly boring.
186
00:09:53,824 --> 00:09:55,243
Russ: Boring?
187
00:09:55,491 --> 00:09:58,028
Boring is good. Boring is what you want.
188
00:09:58,048 --> 00:09:59,786
Just one thing left to do.
189
00:10:01,881 --> 00:10:03,127
Russ: Shots?
190
00:10:03,147 --> 00:10:05,641
Doctor: Semen. (Groans)
191
00:10:06,684 --> 00:10:08,756
(Indistinct conversations)
192
00:10:11,802 --> 00:10:15,066
Hey, where do I go? I got to give this...
193
00:10:15,860 --> 00:10:17,441
Father: One-sixth of 12.
194
00:10:17,461 --> 00:10:20,647
- Daughter: Two.
- Father: Let's do two-fifths of 100.
195
00:10:21,081 --> 00:10:23,953
- Russ: Really? Right here?
- Didi: Be sure to lock the door.
196
00:10:23,973 --> 00:10:25,979
Father: Are you asking me
or are you telling me?
197
00:10:26,113 --> 00:10:27,844
- Daughter: 21.
- Father: 21.
198
00:10:27,864 --> 00:10:29,003
Okay, one-sixth of 12.
199
00:10:29,023 --> 00:10:31,649
Daughter: Two.
Father: Three-quarters of 100.
200
00:10:32,046 --> 00:10:34,962
Daughter: 75.
(Sighs) (Muffled conversations)
201
00:10:44,932 --> 00:10:47,597
Daughter: I divide the circumference
by pi, right?
202
00:10:47,617 --> 00:10:48,950
Father: That's right.
203
00:10:48,970 --> 00:10:51,623
- Daughter: But then how do I get the area?
- Father: Okay, for the area,
204
00:10:51,643 --> 00:10:56,041
it's pi times 2r.
See, we just multiply the diameter by pi.
205
00:10:56,500 --> 00:10:59,893
- Russ: That's wrong. Father:
- What about this here? A third of 15.
206
00:10:59,913 --> 00:11:01,865
Daughter: Five.
207
00:11:01,885 --> 00:11:04,235
Oh, the hell with this.
It isn't gonna work.
208
00:11:04,255 --> 00:11:06,581
- Father: One-half of 20?
- Daughter: Uh, ten.
209
00:11:06,601 --> 00:11:08,095
Didi: You all set?
210
00:11:08,368 --> 00:11:11,591
Russ: No, I haven't even started.
I'm having a little trouble with
211
00:11:11,611 --> 00:11:14,213
the, well, the materials.
212
00:11:14,233 --> 00:11:17,469
- Didi: What kind of trouble?
- Russ: It's just the magazines.
213
00:11:17,489 --> 00:11:20,456
They're soft-core.
214
00:11:22,081 --> 00:11:24,203
I just, I...
215
00:11:26,896 --> 00:11:28,634
It's my second favorite core.
216
00:11:28,654 --> 00:11:32,195
- Didi: Don't they have a DVD?
- Russ: Yeah, it's lesbians.
217
00:11:33,238 --> 00:11:35,689
Lesbian porn just makes me feel like a
third wheel, you know?
218
00:11:35,709 --> 00:11:37,902
It's like, what do they need me for?
219
00:11:37,922 --> 00:11:42,097
I'm just gonna get in the way.
If you have anything, you know, like,
220
00:11:42,117 --> 00:11:45,219
under the desk or in a box or something,
with dudes and chicks,
221
00:11:45,239 --> 00:11:49,157
that'd be awesome, but no
gang bangs, okay? No threesomes.
222
00:11:49,177 --> 00:11:52,376
Nothing in a moving vehicle, okay?
Because I get carsick.
223
00:11:52,396 --> 00:11:56,308
Didi: Do you want to come back at another
time and bring your own materials?
224
00:11:56,594 --> 00:11:57,704
Russ: Oh.
225
00:11:58,232 --> 00:12:02,742
All right, I got this. Excuse me,
do you mind keeping it down, okay?
226
00:12:02,762 --> 00:12:06,960
I just, I have a... I have a meeting in
there, so...
227
00:12:06,980 --> 00:12:09,570
- Father: She has a test tomorrow.
- Russ: This is an important meeting.
228
00:12:09,590 --> 00:12:11,530
Father: Well, this is an important test.
229
00:12:11,550 --> 00:12:14,881
- Russ: Maybe a little help, Didi?
- Father: Third of 15.
230
00:12:14,901 --> 00:12:16,072
Daughter: Five.
231
00:12:16,092 --> 00:12:17,903
- Father: One-half of ten.
- Daughter: Five.
232
00:12:19,154 --> 00:12:22,181
(Horn honking) (Phone ringing)
233
00:12:27,932 --> 00:12:30,360
- Lina: What's up?
- Russ: Hey, I need your help.
234
00:12:30,380 --> 00:12:32,053
Lina: They still wouldn't see you?
235
00:12:32,073 --> 00:12:36,380
Russ: No, I got in.
I just... I need you to take me home.
236
00:12:36,400 --> 00:12:38,634
- Lina: What?
- Russ: What are you wearing?
237
00:12:38,654 --> 00:12:41,029
Lina: Russ, no.
I'm not having phone sex with you.
238
00:12:41,049 --> 00:12:44,144
- I'm in a thrift store.
- Russ: Lina, seriously, come on.
239
00:12:44,164 --> 00:12:45,807
The porn here sucks, okay?
240
00:12:45,827 --> 00:12:49,485
And there's some asshole in the lobby
doing homework with his daughter.
241
00:12:49,505 --> 00:12:52,355
- Lina: This is so unfair.
- Russ: I don't care.
242
00:12:52,490 --> 00:12:55,314
I just... I need you to do something, okay?
I did your script,
243
00:12:55,334 --> 00:12:57,362
- now you do mine.
- Lina: No, this is not a good time.
244
00:12:57,382 --> 00:13:02,299
I just handed over the bassinet.
It's official. No more babies.
245
00:13:02,487 --> 00:13:04,834
Now I have to figure out my life.
I'm just, I can't.
246
00:13:04,854 --> 00:13:08,023
Well, can we figure it out after I come?
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00:13:08,172 --> 00:13:09,835
(Sighs)
248
00:13:10,567 --> 00:13:15,345
- Lina: What do you want me to say?
- Russ: Well, first change your attitude.
249
00:13:15,519 --> 00:13:17,194
Lina (Softly): What do you want me to say?
250
00:13:17,214 --> 00:13:22,819
Russ: There you go.
I got my shorts off. You're naked.
251
00:13:22,953 --> 00:13:25,332
I want you to tell me how I'm
gonna enter you.
252
00:13:25,352 --> 00:13:26,380
Lina: Regular.
253
00:13:26,400 --> 00:13:29,601
No, wrong, okay? Today we do my positions.
254
00:13:29,621 --> 00:13:32,038
Lina: Oh, we're gonna be here all day.
255
00:13:32,058 --> 00:13:34,712
Russ: Just...
start cowgirl, okay, and then reverse it.
256
00:13:34,732 --> 00:13:35,699
Lina (Weakly): Yee-haw.
257
00:13:35,719 --> 00:13:39,136
Russ: Lina, please, I'm in a room
right off of a... lobby
258
00:13:39,156 --> 00:13:44,468
- with people right on the other side.
- Lina: Okay, okay, fine.
259
00:13:44,488 --> 00:13:48,059
So, I push you down on the bed.
260
00:13:48,079 --> 00:13:50,161
- Russ: Okay, good.
- And then I climb up on top of you...
261
00:13:50,181 --> 00:13:52,953
- Russ: Okay.
- Lina:...and put you inside me.
262
00:13:52,973 --> 00:13:55,721
Yeah, and my hands are all over your...
263
00:13:55,741 --> 00:13:58,490
- Lina: Oh, yeah, you're grabbing my ass.
- Russ:...tits, yeah.
264
00:13:58,510 --> 00:14:01,524
- Lina: I mean my tits, yeah, that's right.
- Russ: Yeah, that's good.
265
00:14:01,659 --> 00:14:05,910
Lina: Now I'm sitting on top
of you and... Oh, you're so deep.
266
00:14:05,930 --> 00:14:07,663
- Russ: Yeah, put it inside.
- Lina: Oh, my God.
267
00:14:07,683 --> 00:14:09,128
Man: How much is this jacket?
268
00:14:09,148 --> 00:14:13,150
- There's no sticker.
- Yeah, I don't work here, sorry, dude.
269
00:14:13,170 --> 00:14:15,522
- Russ: Who was that?
- Lina: You don't know him.
270
00:14:15,542 --> 00:14:17,455
Okay, where were we?
271
00:14:17,475 --> 00:14:21,640
- Russ: Uh, you were riding me.
- Lina: Okay, right, so I'm riding you.
272
00:14:22,273 --> 00:14:25,375
- I'm riding you so hard.
- Russ: That's good, yeah.
273
00:14:25,395 --> 00:14:29,612
Lina: It feels so good, I'm digging
my fingernails into your shoulders.
274
00:14:29,632 --> 00:14:31,312
- Russ: Yeah, it feels good.
- Lina: Yeah, it does?
275
00:14:31,332 --> 00:14:32,895
- Russ: Yeah.
- Lina: Yeah, you like that?
276
00:14:32,915 --> 00:14:35,065
- Russ: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Lina: Okay, so now you're,
277
00:14:35,085 --> 00:14:37,174
you're sliding in and out of me,
278
00:14:37,194 --> 00:14:41,257
- and... oh, I'm so wet.
- And you put your finger in my butt.
279
00:14:41,277 --> 00:14:44,901
Lina: Okay, yeah, I'm gonna do that, too.
Oh, yeah. Yeah, come, baby.
280
00:14:45,035 --> 00:14:46,762
- Come on, that's right.
- Russ: I want to come inside you.
281
00:14:46,782 --> 00:14:48,077
- Lina: Okay, yeah.
- Russ: Yeah,
282
00:14:48,097 --> 00:14:49,628
I'm gonna put another baby in you...
283
00:14:49,648 --> 00:14:53,357
- Lina: No, you're not. Russ, no!
- Russ: Yeah, I'm gonna make a baby.
284
00:14:53,377 --> 00:14:55,089
- Lina: Russ, knock it off!
- Russ: That's it!
285
00:14:55,109 --> 00:14:58,204
- Aw, you're gonna be so pregnant!
- Lina: You're being weird.
286
00:14:58,224 --> 00:15:00,450
Russ: Aw! Lina, come on!
287
00:15:00,470 --> 00:15:03,292
Lina: You come on!
We're not doing that anymore. It's weird.
288
00:15:03,312 --> 00:15:05,715
- Russ: Why can't I just pretend?
- Lina: I don't want to.
289
00:15:05,735 --> 00:15:10,263
Russ: I just need to feel like I'm still...
290
00:15:10,983 --> 00:15:12,298
dangerous.
291
00:15:12,318 --> 00:15:14,185
Or something.
292
00:15:16,554 --> 00:15:18,403
(Sighs)
293
00:15:21,282 --> 00:15:24,124
Lina: I get it. Okay.
294
00:15:24,645 --> 00:15:27,323
Okay, so, so I'm riding you.
295
00:15:27,343 --> 00:15:30,078
Russ: Yeah.
Yeah, I'm gonna put a baby in you. Yeah.
296
00:15:30,098 --> 00:15:33,230
Lina: Yeah, you are, yes.
Baby, I want you to come inside me.
297
00:15:33,250 --> 00:15:35,190
I want you to, I want you to shoot it up
inside me.
298
00:15:35,210 --> 00:15:36,415
Russ: Uh-huh, I'm gonna shoot it so deep.
299
00:15:36,435 --> 00:15:38,463
Lina: You're gonna
make me so pregnant... oh, my God!
300
00:15:38,483 --> 00:15:40,349
Russ: I'm gonna make you so pregnant!
That's it.
301
00:15:40,369 --> 00:15:42,558
I want you to make me so pregnant.
Can you do that for me?
302
00:15:42,578 --> 00:15:43,816
Can you? Can you?
303
00:15:43,836 --> 00:15:46,194
- Can you put a baby in me?
- Russ: Yeah, I'm gonna put a baby in you.
304
00:15:46,214 --> 00:15:48,778
Lina: Do it! Come inside me. I want
you to make a baby. That's right, yeah.
305
00:15:48,798 --> 00:15:52,663
Get me pregnant, come on.
Come on, get me so pregnant. Oh, God, yeah!
306
00:15:52,683 --> 00:15:55,805
- Russ: Yeah, keep going. Don't stop.
- Lina: Shoot all over my eggs,
307
00:15:55,825 --> 00:15:58,176
- come on!
- Yeah, I'm gonna shoot on your eggs.
308
00:15:58,196 --> 00:15:59,901
- Oh, my cum's going on your eggs!
- Lina: Okay?
309
00:15:59,921 --> 00:16:01,926
You make me pregnant? Will you knock me up?
310
00:16:01,946 --> 00:16:05,148
Russ: I'm gonna make you pregnant!
I'm gonna make you pregnant! Oh!
311
00:16:05,168 --> 00:16:09,631
- Lina: Make a baby, yeah!
- Russ: Oh! Okay.
312
00:16:09,651 --> 00:16:11,641
(Moaning)
313
00:16:12,001 --> 00:16:14,359
- Oh, wow.
- Please tell me you got it in the cup.
314
00:16:14,379 --> 00:16:18,009
Russ: I think I did. I think most of it.
315
00:16:19,635 --> 00:16:23,029
- Oh, my God.
- Father: The area is pi times 2r.
316
00:16:23,612 --> 00:16:25,958
Okay. All right, I'll see you at home.
317
00:16:25,978 --> 00:16:27,563
We need waffles.
318
00:16:27,583 --> 00:16:29,196
Russ: Okay.
319
00:16:32,021 --> 00:16:33,820
- Daughter: Diameter...
- Father: Mm-hmm.
320
00:16:33,982 --> 00:16:35,265
Daughter:...is pi, right?
321
00:16:35,285 --> 00:16:38,759
- Father: Yeah, that's right.
- Could you remind me how to get the area?
322
00:16:39,367 --> 00:16:42,892
Russ: Might be a little spicy.
I had chorizo for lunch.
323
00:16:42,912 --> 00:16:49,055
Oh, and by the way,
the area of a circle is pi-r-squared. Duh.
324
00:16:50,594 --> 00:16:54,500
- Father: The r, that's the r.
- Daughter: Oh.
325
00:17:04,808 --> 00:17:08,463
- Lina: You bought my bassinet.
- Woman: Who?
326
00:17:08,483 --> 00:17:10,349
Lina: That's my bassinet.
327
00:17:10,369 --> 00:17:14,057
Well, I just donated it, literally I just
donated it.
328
00:17:14,077 --> 00:17:18,132
I hope your baby's as happy
in there as-as my girls were.
329
00:17:18,152 --> 00:17:20,170
Woman: Oh, yeah, I would never
put a baby in this piece of shit.
330
00:17:20,190 --> 00:17:24,312
It's for my ferret. Actually can you mind
holding him while I light my cigarette?
331
00:17:24,672 --> 00:17:26,918
It's really more of
a coffin to bury him in.
332
00:17:26,938 --> 00:17:29,802
'Cause he has cancer.
333
00:17:30,224 --> 00:17:33,922
So, you say it's called a-a bassinet?
334
00:17:38,495 --> 00:17:41,466
(Water splashing) (Harrison cooing)
335
00:17:41,486 --> 00:17:43,701
Jess: Ooh, make little splashes?
336
00:17:43,831 --> 00:17:46,704
(Dinging nearby)
There's too much splashing in the bath.
337
00:17:46,724 --> 00:17:50,150
And too many bubbles for one little baby.
338
00:17:50,170 --> 00:17:52,314
- Shepard: Hey.
- Jess: Hi.
339
00:17:52,334 --> 00:17:54,022
How'd it go with Tammy?
340
00:17:54,042 --> 00:17:55,988
Shepard: She's on her way to Davenport.
341
00:17:56,008 --> 00:17:58,089
Jess: Is that the name of a clinic?
342
00:17:58,109 --> 00:18:01,191
Shepard: No. It's a place in Iowa.
343
00:18:01,240 --> 00:18:05,238
Jess: Aw. Your daddy's a good man.
But he didn't want our meal
344
00:18:05,258 --> 00:18:08,993
ticket to get an abortion.
Isn't that right, daddy?
345
00:18:09,013 --> 00:18:10,946
- Shepard: Stop.
- Jess: What?
346
00:18:10,966 --> 00:18:13,640
That's what happened.
347
00:18:14,782 --> 00:18:16,512
Shepard: What, are you mad?
348
00:18:16,532 --> 00:18:20,185
Jess: You can't make people do things
that they don't want to do, right?
349
00:18:20,205 --> 00:18:24,963
Shepard: And I really don't want
to be managing some kid. I don't.
350
00:18:27,716 --> 00:18:30,935
Hi. Hi! Hey.
351
00:18:31,774 --> 00:18:33,380
Want to watch a movie tonight?
352
00:18:33,784 --> 00:18:35,981
Uh, you know, I can't.
I'm gonna go to the office.
353
00:18:36,001 --> 00:18:38,831
But, um, take a rain check.
354
00:18:40,978 --> 00:18:46,377
(Harrison giggles) (Coos) (Shepard sighs)
355
00:18:52,763 --> 00:18:56,014
- Russ: Hey.
- Lina: Hmm?
356
00:18:56,034 --> 00:18:57,707
Russ: Do you want to have a date?
357
00:18:57,727 --> 00:19:02,066
Lina: Mm... I'm not taking my shirt off.
358
00:19:02,201 --> 00:19:05,284
Russ: That's okay. But can we
talk about the pregnant stuff again?
359
00:19:05,304 --> 00:19:08,025
- Lina: No chance.
- Russ: Come on.
360
00:19:08,045 --> 00:19:09,155
Lina: No.
361
00:19:09,175 --> 00:19:13,120
Russ: Well, then, can we pretend that
I'm a cashier at Ralphs and you're, um,
362
00:19:13,140 --> 00:19:17,389
returning some old lettuce?
(Lina laughs)
363
00:19:19,064 --> 00:19:22,047
Lina: Oh, look at this lettuce.
364
00:19:22,067 --> 00:19:24,117
- Russ: Ah...
- Lina: It's so wilted.
365
00:19:24,137 --> 00:19:28,860
- Russ: Yes, yes! It is.
- Lina (Laughing): You're so weird!
366
00:19:48,981 --> 00:19:50,281
Man: Hey.
367
00:19:51,557 --> 00:19:53,117
Jess: Hey.
368
00:19:53,629 --> 00:19:55,590
Man: Can I sit with you?
369
00:19:56,496 --> 00:19:57,692
(Jess laughs)
370
00:19:57,712 --> 00:19:59,561
Jess: Sure.
371
00:20:00,057 --> 00:20:01,658
(Man clears throat)
372
00:20:05,242 --> 00:20:06,885
Man: Are you alone?
373
00:20:06,905 --> 00:20:09,000
Jess: Uh...
374
00:20:09,020 --> 00:20:11,968
sync and corrected by ninh
www.addic7ed.com
32139
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