All language subtitles for Ghosts.2019.S01E01.Who.Do.You.Think.You.Are.1080p.AMZN.WEB-DL.DD+5.1.H.264-Cinefeel_Subtitles01.ENG

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:37,880 --> 00:00:39,280 It won't be long now. 2 00:00:40,280 --> 00:00:41,880 She had a tremendous innings. 3 00:00:41,920 --> 00:00:43,720 At least she's comfortable. 4 00:00:43,760 --> 00:00:46,360 Yeah, there are worse ways to go. 5 00:00:46,400 --> 00:00:48,480 - Well, this is it. - You're telling me! 6 00:00:48,520 --> 00:00:50,680 - You can say that again. - Quiet. 7 00:00:50,720 --> 00:00:53,600 - Shh! I think it's happening. - Oh! 8 00:00:53,640 --> 00:00:55,240 Stand by. 9 00:00:55,280 --> 00:00:56,600 Shh! 10 00:01:03,680 --> 00:01:07,720 - I think she's going. - Oh, I do hope she stays. 11 00:01:07,760 --> 00:01:09,120 Tenner says she stays. 12 00:01:10,320 --> 00:01:11,320 Deal. 13 00:01:11,360 --> 00:01:13,480 I can't see anything. Can you lift me up a bit? 14 00:01:13,520 --> 00:01:14,600 Argh! 15 00:01:14,640 --> 00:01:16,600 Oh, not this again. 16 00:01:16,640 --> 00:01:18,840 Who are you? 17 00:01:18,880 --> 00:01:21,520 I am the ghost of your great-grandmother. 18 00:01:21,560 --> 00:01:26,600 We are those poor spirits who dwell on, compelled for reasons unknown... 19 00:01:26,640 --> 00:01:28,400 Ah, she's gone. 20 00:01:29,520 --> 00:01:32,000 - Lucky cow. - Good on her, actually. 21 00:01:32,040 --> 00:01:34,080 What's going on? All I can see is shoes. 22 00:01:34,120 --> 00:01:35,800 - You owe me ten. - Oh, no, no, if you listened 23 00:01:35,840 --> 00:01:37,640 - to what I actually said... - Oh, don't start. 24 00:01:37,680 --> 00:01:39,080 - Guys, if you please! - You... 25 00:01:39,120 --> 00:01:42,480 Perhaps one of us should say a few words. 26 00:01:42,520 --> 00:01:44,200 Yes, I'll do it. 27 00:01:47,200 --> 00:01:49,200 Bagsy her room. 28 00:01:49,240 --> 00:01:51,000 - Oh, she's only just died. - Honestly. 29 00:01:51,040 --> 00:01:53,960 Well, I'll wait until they've taken her away, of course. 30 00:01:54,000 --> 00:01:58,360 She was the last Button of Button House. 31 00:01:58,400 --> 00:02:00,960 The final Button died today 32 00:02:01,000 --> 00:02:03,840 Though where she goes, we cannot say... 33 00:02:03,880 --> 00:02:06,120 Oh, he's off again. 34 00:02:06,160 --> 00:02:08,840 - It seems but only yesterday... - Hey, come on. 35 00:02:08,880 --> 00:02:12,280 - Don't go without me. Oh, stupid body. - She lost her life 36 00:02:12,320 --> 00:02:14,960 'Twas like...a play 37 00:02:15,000 --> 00:02:18,280 But with no children of her own 38 00:02:18,320 --> 00:02:23,320 Who then will come to call this home? 39 00:02:25,000 --> 00:02:27,200 Well, it's bigger than the place we're renting. 40 00:02:27,240 --> 00:02:30,680 - And it's slightly over budget, but... - Does it have a garden? 41 00:02:30,720 --> 00:02:33,200 No, but the downstairs flat's got one you can look at. 42 00:02:33,240 --> 00:02:34,240 So... 43 00:02:34,280 --> 00:02:35,400 - Yeah? - Oh. 44 00:02:35,440 --> 00:02:37,360 Sorry, one second. 45 00:02:37,400 --> 00:02:39,600 Hello, Clasey Hughes Estate. 46 00:02:41,360 --> 00:02:43,680 - Nice view of the street. - Yeah. 47 00:02:43,720 --> 00:02:47,240 "Buddy's Fish 'n' Pizza." 48 00:02:47,280 --> 00:02:49,920 Well, we do like both those things. 49 00:02:49,960 --> 00:02:50,960 Hmm. 50 00:02:53,560 --> 00:02:54,680 - It's rubbish, isn't it? - Yep. 51 00:02:54,720 --> 00:02:58,240 - It's so bad. - It's awful and I hate it. 52 00:02:58,280 --> 00:03:00,000 - Sorry. - Nah, fair enough. 53 00:03:00,040 --> 00:03:01,520 I wouldn't want to live here either. 54 00:03:05,120 --> 00:03:07,680 - Hello? - Oh, hello. Is that Alison Cooper? 55 00:03:07,720 --> 00:03:10,120 - Speaking. - I'm calling about a house. 56 00:03:10,160 --> 00:03:12,240 We're only looking at flats. We can't afford to buy a house. 57 00:03:12,280 --> 00:03:13,600 No, this one's not for sale. 58 00:03:13,640 --> 00:03:15,680 Then why are you calling? 59 00:03:15,720 --> 00:03:17,520 God, I hate estate agents. 60 00:03:17,560 --> 00:03:20,040 Apart from the good ones like you. 61 00:03:22,160 --> 00:03:23,800 Yep? 62 00:03:23,840 --> 00:03:26,560 Sorry, I think we've got off on the wrong foot. 63 00:03:26,600 --> 00:03:29,400 I'm a solicitor at Worthing, Cole & Simons... 64 00:03:29,440 --> 00:03:31,480 ...and I'm calling to inform you 65 00:03:31,520 --> 00:03:34,960 that you have in fact inherited a house. 66 00:03:36,240 --> 00:03:37,360 Hello? 67 00:03:37,400 --> 00:03:38,560 Hello? 68 00:03:58,600 --> 00:04:01,200 That's you in the corner there. 69 00:04:01,240 --> 00:04:06,320 So she was like my step-great auntie? 70 00:04:06,360 --> 00:04:07,880 There's no real term for what you are, 71 00:04:07,920 --> 00:04:11,720 but she sadly had no direct relatives and so you're the only one. 72 00:04:12,840 --> 00:04:14,720 I feel like I'm in the headmaster's office. 73 00:04:16,000 --> 00:04:18,000 I put a pussy willow in Daniel Bellingham's ear, 74 00:04:18,040 --> 00:04:19,720 and he tried to get it out and just pushed it further in. 75 00:04:19,760 --> 00:04:20,880 He had to go to the doctor's. 76 00:04:20,920 --> 00:04:23,720 It wasn't A&E or anything, it was just... 77 00:04:23,760 --> 00:04:26,280 He's fine now. He's a pastry chef. 78 00:04:27,800 --> 00:04:29,040 These look nice. 79 00:04:29,080 --> 00:04:30,480 That's potpourri. 80 00:04:34,080 --> 00:04:37,040 - Was she old? - She was 99. 81 00:04:37,080 --> 00:04:38,800 Oh, so close. 82 00:04:38,840 --> 00:04:40,720 And there she is. 83 00:04:40,760 --> 00:04:42,080 Lady Heather Button. 84 00:04:42,120 --> 00:04:44,040 The Buttons go back a long way. 85 00:04:44,080 --> 00:04:46,120 Lady? 86 00:04:46,160 --> 00:04:47,360 Does that mean I'm a lady? 87 00:04:47,400 --> 00:04:51,440 OK, I know I'm a lady, but, like, a Lady lady? 88 00:04:51,480 --> 00:04:54,640 Like Lady Gaga. No, no... It's not this house, is it? 89 00:04:55,840 --> 00:04:59,200 As a matter of fact, it is. Button House. 90 00:04:59,240 --> 00:05:00,840 - No. - Huh? 91 00:05:00,880 --> 00:05:05,560 Now, obviously, it can take several years to find a buyer and close the sale... 92 00:05:07,080 --> 00:05:10,040 ...luxury hotel chains, that sort of thing. 93 00:05:10,080 --> 00:05:14,400 I mean, she lived on her own... 94 00:05:16,240 --> 00:05:20,120 - What if we keep it? - Yes. That is a great idea. 95 00:05:20,160 --> 00:05:22,400 The house is in a state of some disrepair. 96 00:05:22,440 --> 00:05:25,120 We were looking for a bit of a project anyway 97 00:05:25,160 --> 00:05:27,960 and I retiled the bit behind the sink in our last flat, so... 98 00:05:28,000 --> 00:05:30,000 - The splashback? - Is it? 99 00:05:30,040 --> 00:05:33,680 I'm not sure this falls into the category of DIY. 100 00:05:33,720 --> 00:05:35,400 You should at least have a survey done before... 101 00:05:35,440 --> 00:05:38,560 I just feel like it would be better to keep it in the family. 102 00:05:38,600 --> 00:05:41,040 I think, actually, that's what she would have wanted. 103 00:05:41,080 --> 00:05:43,040 - Aunt Helen. - Heather. 104 00:05:43,080 --> 00:05:44,520 - Heather. - And if it can make money 105 00:05:44,560 --> 00:05:46,600 for some hotel chain, then why not make it work for us? 106 00:05:46,640 --> 00:05:48,080 - We could give up our jobs. - Yes. 107 00:05:48,120 --> 00:05:50,120 - We could do this full-time. - OK, yes. 108 00:05:50,160 --> 00:05:51,880 Can we keep it if we want to? 109 00:05:51,920 --> 00:05:55,200 Well, it is your house. 110 00:05:55,240 --> 00:05:56,800 Sorry. 111 00:06:04,560 --> 00:06:06,840 Ah, look what the cat's dragged in. 112 00:06:06,880 --> 00:06:09,520 Down here. You're warm. 113 00:06:09,560 --> 00:06:10,840 Warmer. 114 00:06:10,880 --> 00:06:12,000 Yeah, you're boiling. 115 00:06:12,040 --> 00:06:13,240 No. Cold... 116 00:06:13,280 --> 00:06:14,840 Getting... Agh! 117 00:06:14,880 --> 00:06:16,640 Down here! You deaf... 118 00:06:16,680 --> 00:06:18,120 Well, I've got the ears, haven't I? 119 00:06:19,520 --> 00:06:20,840 Er... 120 00:06:22,040 --> 00:06:23,960 - Little guy... - Pawn. 121 00:06:24,000 --> 00:06:27,200 Prawn...go dooka-dooka. 122 00:06:27,240 --> 00:06:29,640 - But that's... - Checkmate. 123 00:06:29,680 --> 00:06:31,920 Fine. Best of 20. 124 00:06:31,960 --> 00:06:33,560 Oh, come on. 125 00:06:33,600 --> 00:06:39,800 Ideally, you want it about five potatoes high. 126 00:06:39,840 --> 00:06:43,560 This one's going to have mud on it, but you don't have to have mud on it. 127 00:06:43,600 --> 00:06:45,080 This is the tip. 128 00:06:45,120 --> 00:06:48,880 We insert the tip into the split. 129 00:06:48,920 --> 00:06:50,480 Into the slath. 130 00:06:50,520 --> 00:06:51,760 Yeah. 131 00:06:51,800 --> 00:06:57,280 Thence repeat the process till you be done. 132 00:06:57,320 --> 00:07:02,160 Great. Lovely talk of the day from Mary today. 133 00:07:02,200 --> 00:07:05,800 I think I can safely say if we had any wicker, or indeed we could touch anything, 134 00:07:05,840 --> 00:07:07,920 we could all make a pretty rad-looking basket. 135 00:07:07,960 --> 00:07:11,680 Maybe next week, please, we'd all be very interested to hear about the trial. 136 00:07:11,720 --> 00:07:13,800 The witch trial. Huh? 137 00:07:15,440 --> 00:07:16,520 It's too soon? 138 00:07:16,560 --> 00:07:20,160 When you're ready. So, tomorrow is food club! 139 00:07:20,200 --> 00:07:22,280 - Oh, dear. - When Kitty will be telling us 140 00:07:22,320 --> 00:07:24,720 all about the first time she ate an egg. 141 00:07:24,720 --> 00:07:26,480 - I actually didn't like it. - All right, Kitty. 142 00:07:26,520 --> 00:07:29,800 Well, save it for tomorrow, please. Give us something look forward to. 143 00:07:29,840 --> 00:07:34,680 And then on Wednesday, Julian has volunteered to make a speech. 144 00:07:34,720 --> 00:07:37,840 Yes, my by-election victory speech, '91. 145 00:07:37,880 --> 00:07:42,520 Very inspiring, very long and a few smutty jokes - keep it light. 146 00:07:42,560 --> 00:07:45,120 - Oh, God, spare me. - Right, that's it. 147 00:07:45,160 --> 00:07:47,280 Pat, sit down. 148 00:07:47,320 --> 00:07:49,320 Right, AOB? Any other business? 149 00:07:49,360 --> 00:07:53,240 Well, I have got something, actually. Now, ever since I moved rooms, 150 00:07:53,280 --> 00:07:57,520 I've been woken every night by you, Fanny, screaming like a mad person. 151 00:07:57,560 --> 00:07:59,480 Well, I don't think I do! 152 00:08:04,520 --> 00:08:07,120 - I always thought that was an owl. - An owl? 153 00:08:07,160 --> 00:08:09,000 Do you know what an owl sounds like? 154 00:08:09,040 --> 00:08:11,720 - Well, now I don't think so. - It has got to stop! 155 00:08:11,760 --> 00:08:15,400 Look, look, this is my house and I shall do what I like. 156 00:08:15,440 --> 00:08:16,840 It was mine first. 157 00:08:16,880 --> 00:08:19,960 No, that's the land, not the house. 158 00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:23,000 Well, I wish you would all hush. I cannot do my work 159 00:08:23,040 --> 00:08:25,360 - with all this agitation. - Work? 160 00:08:25,400 --> 00:08:27,840 You haven't done a day's work in your life...or death. 161 00:08:27,880 --> 00:08:29,200 - Oh! - He's an artist. 162 00:08:29,240 --> 00:08:31,360 - Pfft! - He's ahead of his time. 163 00:08:31,400 --> 00:08:33,480 Oh, he can't still be ahead of his time, Kitty. 164 00:08:33,520 --> 00:08:35,280 Guys, please! 165 00:08:35,320 --> 00:08:38,640 Why don't you just go back to your old room in the east wing? 166 00:08:38,680 --> 00:08:40,040 I don't see why I should. 167 00:08:40,080 --> 00:08:41,920 I wanted the garden view. Now, as ranking officer... 168 00:08:41,960 --> 00:08:44,520 The garden view comes with the screaming woman. 169 00:08:44,560 --> 00:08:46,920 You get used to it after 100 years. 170 00:08:48,320 --> 00:08:51,240 - Let's be serious here. - Don't you get involved. 171 00:08:51,280 --> 00:08:54,960 Argh! 172 00:08:55,000 --> 00:08:58,120 It's simple. You swap rooms, eh? 173 00:08:58,160 --> 00:09:00,720 You go up top. 174 00:09:00,760 --> 00:09:04,160 You come ground floor and no jumpy. 175 00:09:04,200 --> 00:09:07,120 Right. Well, that would suit me, I think. 176 00:09:07,160 --> 00:09:08,640 Yeah, that could work. 177 00:09:08,680 --> 00:09:11,880 - Not just a pretty face. - Well, quite. 178 00:09:18,040 --> 00:09:19,280 Hmm. Yeah. 179 00:09:25,200 --> 00:09:26,440 Hup! Ah. 180 00:09:27,480 --> 00:09:29,360 Ah, splendid! 181 00:09:46,520 --> 00:09:48,000 Fanny? 182 00:09:53,920 --> 00:09:55,480 What is it, Fanny? 183 00:09:57,600 --> 00:09:59,320 George? 184 00:10:02,160 --> 00:10:03,880 Oh, for heaven's sake. 185 00:10:04,960 --> 00:10:07,440 Throw yourself out of your own damned window! 186 00:10:12,440 --> 00:10:14,800 # I'm bringing sexy back, yeah... # 187 00:10:20,160 --> 00:10:23,800 # Ohh! Ow-oh! 188 00:10:26,720 --> 00:10:30,640 # My life has been so overprotected... # 189 00:10:30,680 --> 00:10:32,520 I always get the timing wrong on that. 190 00:10:32,560 --> 00:10:34,640 - Hang on, hang on. - ALISON # Whoa-whoa-whoa! # 191 00:10:35,680 --> 00:10:38,640 I think this is it. 192 00:10:39,680 --> 00:10:41,680 Oh, my God. 193 00:10:41,720 --> 00:10:43,080 My heart. 194 00:10:43,120 --> 00:10:44,120 Yeah? 195 00:10:45,320 --> 00:10:46,600 It's so strange. I... 196 00:10:47,640 --> 00:10:49,240 I feel like I know the place already. 197 00:10:50,680 --> 00:10:51,680 This track. 198 00:10:52,960 --> 00:10:54,240 Every tree. 199 00:10:54,280 --> 00:10:56,640 It's like I've been here my whole life. 200 00:10:57,960 --> 00:10:58,960 Like it's... 201 00:11:00,120 --> 00:11:01,280 ...home. 202 00:11:01,320 --> 00:11:03,480 - This is the wrong one. - Yeah. 203 00:11:07,560 --> 00:11:10,160 - This really is beyond the pale! - Oh, has it happened again? 204 00:11:10,200 --> 00:11:14,200 You entered my room, you said, "George", and then threw yourself out of the window. 205 00:11:14,240 --> 00:11:16,600 Well, look, I don't even realise I'm doing it. 206 00:11:16,640 --> 00:11:19,080 Perhaps there's some deeply buried reason 207 00:11:19,120 --> 00:11:21,360 why you feel like you have to re-enact... 208 00:11:21,400 --> 00:11:24,120 Maybe try jumping out of the window before bed. 209 00:11:24,160 --> 00:11:26,760 - Get it out of the way. - No, it's not so much the jumping. 210 00:11:26,800 --> 00:11:29,880 - It's the screaming that's annoying. - Yes, that's a compromise. 211 00:11:29,920 --> 00:11:31,920 Keep the jumping, but do it silently. 212 00:11:31,960 --> 00:11:35,960 Staying hush whilst falling from a height? Tush and flops. 213 00:11:36,000 --> 00:11:38,240 Look, perhaps I scream because... 214 00:11:39,400 --> 00:11:41,120 ..and I've never told anyone this, but, um... 215 00:11:41,160 --> 00:11:43,480 It's quite all right. We shan't pry. 216 00:11:43,520 --> 00:11:44,880 It's just that the night that I actually... 217 00:11:44,920 --> 00:11:49,240 No, look, no screaming. That's all I ask. Is that reasonable? Good. 218 00:11:49,280 --> 00:11:51,360 Oh! Argh! Eeh! 219 00:11:51,400 --> 00:11:54,600 Box. Move. Got wheel. 220 00:11:54,640 --> 00:11:55,960 Vroom! 221 00:11:56,000 --> 00:11:57,520 - That's a motorcar. - Car! 222 00:11:57,560 --> 00:12:01,200 Wow! It's like a blooming spaceship. 223 00:12:01,240 --> 00:12:03,840 Poor creatures must be lost. 224 00:12:07,120 --> 00:12:08,840 It's Kim Wilde. 225 00:12:10,520 --> 00:12:15,480 Let me pluck out my eyes, for never will I see such beauty again. 226 00:12:15,520 --> 00:12:18,360 Yes, he'd make a very fine soldier. 227 00:12:28,200 --> 00:12:31,720 - Wow! - Shall we, Lady Alison? 228 00:12:41,120 --> 00:12:42,320 Oh! 229 00:12:44,080 --> 00:12:45,240 Oh, my... 230 00:12:46,800 --> 00:12:52,400 This is 100% the most incredible moment of my life, apart from my wedding. 231 00:12:53,480 --> 00:12:55,360 And it's all ours. 232 00:12:55,400 --> 00:12:57,240 What did that girl just say? 233 00:12:57,280 --> 00:12:59,280 She must be related to you. 234 00:12:59,320 --> 00:13:03,560 Like a niece, a great-great-great... 235 00:13:03,600 --> 00:13:05,880 No, no, no, no. She's no niece of mine. 236 00:13:05,920 --> 00:13:09,640 Look at her. She's exposing her knees, and she's got a tattoo. 237 00:13:09,680 --> 00:13:10,840 So this is the library. 238 00:13:10,880 --> 00:13:12,440 Does that mean we have to start reading books? 239 00:13:12,480 --> 00:13:13,640 Philistine. 240 00:13:13,680 --> 00:13:16,200 Well, it'll be nice to have some new faces around. 241 00:13:16,240 --> 00:13:17,840 There's enough faces already. 242 00:13:17,880 --> 00:13:19,280 We'd have to fix up all the plasterwork. 243 00:13:19,320 --> 00:13:22,400 Hmm. But need fix architrave. 244 00:13:22,440 --> 00:13:23,440 Oh, yeah. 245 00:13:23,480 --> 00:13:24,600 We could do every room 246 00:13:24,640 --> 00:13:26,000 - in a different style. - Great idea. 247 00:13:26,040 --> 00:13:27,200 Over my dead body! 248 00:13:27,240 --> 00:13:28,480 - Wait, you... - I know. 249 00:13:29,640 --> 00:13:30,920 Ye olde-worlde. 250 00:13:32,440 --> 00:13:34,280 1950s. 251 00:13:36,200 --> 00:13:39,040 - Club Tropicana. - Oh, that's fun! 252 00:13:39,080 --> 00:13:41,040 - Wow. - Unbelievable. 253 00:13:41,080 --> 00:13:42,480 Well, they seem really nice. 254 00:13:42,520 --> 00:13:44,640 - Let's give them a chance. - Yeah. 255 00:13:44,680 --> 00:13:45,800 Look at that. 256 00:13:45,840 --> 00:13:46,880 - What is that? - Is that a lake? 257 00:13:46,920 --> 00:13:49,720 Oh, I hate it when that happens. 258 00:13:49,760 --> 00:13:50,800 That's a lake. 259 00:13:50,840 --> 00:13:53,720 Well, there's only two of them. Still plenty of room for us. 260 00:13:53,760 --> 00:13:55,960 This is going to make one incredible hotel. 261 00:13:59,320 --> 00:14:00,880 What is hotel? 262 00:14:00,920 --> 00:14:03,440 Well, Robin, a hotel is... 263 00:14:03,480 --> 00:14:05,520 - Kill them. - I quite agree. 264 00:14:05,560 --> 00:14:08,440 If we all approve the use of force to enable them to, 265 00:14:08,480 --> 00:14:11,360 - you know, not live any more. - Out of the question. 266 00:14:11,400 --> 00:14:13,400 - That's completely immoral. - And it's wrong. 267 00:14:13,440 --> 00:14:15,880 And if we do kill them, we could be stuck with them forever. 268 00:14:15,920 --> 00:14:17,320 Would that so bad? 269 00:14:17,360 --> 00:14:19,280 She's married, Thomas. Look at them. 270 00:14:19,320 --> 00:14:21,480 Why must I always be spurned? 271 00:14:21,520 --> 00:14:23,640 Couldn't we all just live in the gatehouse? 272 00:14:23,680 --> 00:14:25,200 I'd rather kill them. 273 00:14:25,240 --> 00:14:26,720 - Kill them. - Hear, hear! 274 00:14:26,760 --> 00:14:28,200 But that's a crime. 275 00:14:28,240 --> 00:14:29,240 We'll hang! 276 00:14:30,720 --> 00:14:33,680 Dammit, Fanny! 277 00:14:33,720 --> 00:14:35,360 Well, we could always try... 278 00:14:36,520 --> 00:14:37,680 ...haunting. 279 00:14:39,240 --> 00:14:42,360 We're ghosts. 280 00:14:47,000 --> 00:14:48,760 Your tea, milady. 281 00:14:48,800 --> 00:14:50,920 Thank you, Jeeves. 282 00:14:52,000 --> 00:14:54,200 - Taste all right? - Why? 283 00:14:54,240 --> 00:14:57,360 I couldn't get any water in the kitchen and I couldn't find the other kitchen, 284 00:14:57,400 --> 00:14:58,800 so I ended up using the garden tap, 285 00:14:58,840 --> 00:15:00,560 and then there's no electric in the kitchen, 286 00:15:00,600 --> 00:15:02,320 so I found a plug that worked in the library. 287 00:15:02,360 --> 00:15:04,400 I don't know if the water's drinkable, but I boiled it twice. 288 00:15:05,600 --> 00:15:07,360 I love the sound of the country. 289 00:15:08,880 --> 00:15:10,000 It's in the room. 290 00:15:10,040 --> 00:15:11,400 Oh, yeah. 291 00:15:11,440 --> 00:15:13,280 It must be nesting somewhere. 292 00:15:13,320 --> 00:15:14,840 Right, what's first? 293 00:15:14,880 --> 00:15:16,400 The pipes? Electrics? 294 00:15:16,440 --> 00:15:18,280 Probably get the bird out the room. 295 00:15:18,320 --> 00:15:19,840 Yeah. 296 00:15:19,880 --> 00:15:22,040 Come on, then, pidgey-bigdey-bigdey! 297 00:15:22,080 --> 00:15:23,800 Gah! Agh! 298 00:15:23,840 --> 00:15:27,320 Now then, let's have a look at some of the skills at our disposal, shall we? 299 00:15:27,360 --> 00:15:30,040 Now, we all know that Robin can do that thing with the lights. 300 00:15:30,080 --> 00:15:31,440 - Will you please, Robin? - Oh, yeah. 301 00:15:32,800 --> 00:15:35,120 Heugh! 302 00:15:38,080 --> 00:15:39,520 - Very good. - Excellent. 303 00:15:39,560 --> 00:15:42,200 - Yes, Mary? - When I pass through livings, 304 00:15:42,240 --> 00:15:44,440 - they smells burnings. - Excellent. 305 00:15:44,480 --> 00:15:47,960 - None of those are plural, but... - 'Tis a most noxious stink, though. 306 00:15:48,000 --> 00:15:51,720 - When I was alive... - Oh, here he goes. 307 00:15:51,760 --> 00:15:54,600 ...it was rumoured a little plague girl 308 00:15:54,640 --> 00:15:58,000 could oft be heard singing in the pantry. 309 00:15:58,960 --> 00:16:02,440 # Ring a ring o' roses 310 00:16:02,480 --> 00:16:06,200 # A pocketful of posies 311 00:16:06,240 --> 00:16:08,120 # Atishoo 312 00:16:08,160 --> 00:16:09,320 # Atishoo 313 00:16:09,360 --> 00:16:11,760 # We all fall down. # 314 00:16:13,960 --> 00:16:16,320 People find it scary, apparently. 315 00:16:16,360 --> 00:16:19,400 Can't think why. 316 00:16:19,440 --> 00:16:20,960 - Ahem. - Finally, 317 00:16:21,000 --> 00:16:23,440 we're all aware of Julian's extraordinary powers. 318 00:16:23,480 --> 00:16:26,520 Oh, please. 319 00:16:26,560 --> 00:16:28,200 Come on. 320 00:16:28,240 --> 00:16:29,400 All right, all right, all right, all right. 321 00:16:29,440 --> 00:16:31,440 All right. Just.. I need a little bit... OK, here we go. 322 00:16:31,480 --> 00:16:33,160 - Ahem. - Shh, shh. 323 00:16:35,920 --> 00:16:37,200 Oh! Hold on. 324 00:16:42,840 --> 00:16:44,400 Argh! 325 00:16:44,440 --> 00:16:45,760 Here we go. 326 00:16:54,480 --> 00:16:55,480 Extraordinary! 327 00:16:55,520 --> 00:16:58,280 I've only tried it on cups, but, you know. 328 00:16:58,320 --> 00:17:01,160 Excellent. Well, with my leadership and your skills... 329 00:17:02,440 --> 00:17:06,360 ...I believe we have everything we need to scare them out of their wits. 330 00:17:08,360 --> 00:17:10,160 The water's gone cold! 331 00:17:10,200 --> 00:17:12,040 It's so cold! Mike! 332 00:17:12,080 --> 00:17:13,080 Oh, God. 333 00:17:14,600 --> 00:17:15,720 Thomas? 334 00:17:15,760 --> 00:17:18,720 What?! I wasn't looking, and anyway, I couldn't see anything, so... 335 00:17:18,760 --> 00:17:21,040 All right, mate. Is she coming out? 336 00:17:22,280 --> 00:17:23,920 Yes, I think she is. 337 00:17:23,960 --> 00:17:25,840 - She's coming out! - Oh! 338 00:17:25,880 --> 00:17:28,640 Stand to, everybody. Prepare for action. 339 00:17:28,680 --> 00:17:32,280 Good luck, everyone. And remember, as long as you do your best... 340 00:17:36,640 --> 00:17:38,080 - Finished? - Yes. 341 00:17:38,120 --> 00:17:40,000 Hot water's stopped. 342 00:17:41,040 --> 00:17:42,240 Go for Robin. 343 00:17:47,680 --> 00:17:48,800 Agh! 344 00:17:48,840 --> 00:17:49,840 Agh! 345 00:17:51,240 --> 00:17:53,800 Man down. Right, cue Jemima. 346 00:17:53,840 --> 00:17:57,680 # Ring a ring o' roses... # 347 00:17:57,720 --> 00:17:59,000 Yes! Got the speakers hooked up. 348 00:17:59,040 --> 00:18:01,720 - Well, that's the main thing. - Yes, please, Mary. 349 00:18:03,840 --> 00:18:06,000 - I think your toast is burning. - Dammit! 350 00:18:06,040 --> 00:18:09,040 All on you now, Julian. 351 00:18:09,080 --> 00:18:11,800 - Push it! - Come on! Push it! 352 00:18:14,160 --> 00:18:16,080 - Come on, Julian! Push it! - Come on! 353 00:18:21,960 --> 00:18:24,200 Agh! 354 00:18:24,240 --> 00:18:26,240 Dammit! 355 00:18:26,280 --> 00:18:29,280 You know, it's much bigger than a cup, so... Agh! 356 00:18:29,320 --> 00:18:32,360 - Haunting's hard, isn't it? - So, how did it go? 357 00:18:34,320 --> 00:18:36,160 Guys? 358 00:18:38,000 --> 00:18:39,800 Right, well, I think the boiler's in... 359 00:18:42,880 --> 00:18:44,760 ...there? 360 00:18:52,760 --> 00:18:53,840 After you. 361 00:19:18,720 --> 00:19:21,760 Sing something, make this less scary. 362 00:19:23,120 --> 00:19:27,240 # Don't be scared Don't be scared 363 00:19:27,280 --> 00:19:30,240 - # I'm not scared... # - OK, you're making it worse. 364 00:19:31,440 --> 00:19:32,440 There's another switch here. 365 00:19:37,960 --> 00:19:40,160 I can fix this. 366 00:19:40,200 --> 00:19:42,640 What? Are you joking? 367 00:19:42,680 --> 00:19:44,920 - Who are they? - I don't know. 368 00:19:44,960 --> 00:19:46,280 Look it up on YouTube. 369 00:19:46,320 --> 00:19:48,280 Mike, not everything can be learned from a YouTube tutorial. 370 00:19:48,320 --> 00:19:50,680 You'd be surprised. I found a guide on how to tame an eagle. 371 00:19:50,720 --> 00:19:51,720 Yeah, but that's not... 372 00:19:51,760 --> 00:19:53,760 - What, an actual eagle? - Mmm. 373 00:19:53,800 --> 00:19:56,760 - Why would you need to know that? - Don't know. Cool, though. 374 00:19:56,800 --> 00:19:58,320 So cool. 375 00:19:58,360 --> 00:20:00,760 - Erm... - Oi, don't fiddle with that. 376 00:20:00,800 --> 00:20:04,440 - Do you even know what that does? - Yeah, it's the thing for the thingy-bob. 377 00:20:04,480 --> 00:20:06,160 It's the valve for the filling loop. 378 00:20:08,800 --> 00:20:10,640 - Hey! Woo! - Fixed it. 379 00:20:10,680 --> 00:20:12,760 No, you haven't. It's just the pilot light. 380 00:20:12,800 --> 00:20:14,440 - Do you think we need a new one? - What? 381 00:20:14,480 --> 00:20:16,280 - Get rid of old Betty? - No, no. 382 00:20:16,320 --> 00:20:17,640 Let's see what the surveyor says next week, hmm? 383 00:20:17,680 --> 00:20:19,880 - Mmm. - OK. 384 00:20:21,000 --> 00:20:22,120 Er... 385 00:20:22,160 --> 00:20:24,080 Ready? 386 00:20:24,120 --> 00:20:25,280 Ready. 387 00:20:27,840 --> 00:20:30,640 - I wasn't ready. - Well, that was nice, anyway. 388 00:20:30,680 --> 00:20:32,560 Yeah, come back soon! 389 00:20:32,600 --> 00:20:34,440 Oh, they can't hear me, can they? 390 00:20:40,480 --> 00:20:43,240 They're not warming up down here. How's yours? 391 00:20:43,280 --> 00:20:44,560 Give me a sec. 392 00:20:56,920 --> 00:20:58,480 There you are. 393 00:21:01,920 --> 00:21:03,360 Hello! 394 00:21:03,400 --> 00:21:07,480 We'll be overrun with people! 395 00:21:07,520 --> 00:21:09,680 Taunting us with their life! 396 00:21:11,440 --> 00:21:13,760 No, we'll just try again. 397 00:21:13,800 --> 00:21:15,840 If at first you don't succeed... 398 00:21:15,880 --> 00:21:20,360 Precisely. That's right. We must prepare another charge. 399 00:21:20,400 --> 00:21:21,640 Hit them when they're vulnerable. 400 00:21:21,680 --> 00:21:24,960 We may have lost the battle, but the war is far from over. 401 00:21:36,640 --> 00:21:37,960 Fanny's early. 402 00:21:38,000 --> 00:21:40,360 - Er, I'm right here. - What? 403 00:21:40,400 --> 00:21:43,760 Agh! Is Kim Wilde! 404 00:21:43,800 --> 00:21:45,800 Alison! Alison! 405 00:21:45,840 --> 00:21:50,160 Alison! Alison! Alison! 406 00:21:50,200 --> 00:21:54,440 Look at me. Look at me. Alison, can you hear me? 407 00:21:54,480 --> 00:21:59,040 Alison, I'm here. Can you hear me? Yeah? Stay with me. Keep your eyes open. 408 00:21:59,080 --> 00:22:01,520 Alison, I'm here. I'm here. 409 00:22:14,080 --> 00:22:17,320 - L-L-Let me be absolutely clear. - Did you push her? 410 00:22:17,360 --> 00:22:18,400 Well, now, the thing you have to understand 411 00:22:18,440 --> 00:22:19,440 - is this... - I'm sorry, 412 00:22:19,480 --> 00:22:22,280 but it's rather a yes or no question. 413 00:22:22,320 --> 00:22:24,240 I took a decision to...to... 414 00:22:24,280 --> 00:22:25,520 Pushy or no pushy? 415 00:22:25,560 --> 00:22:28,920 Well, you know, Robin, let me ask you this. You know, what was the context? 416 00:22:28,960 --> 00:22:31,880 Answer the question, damn your eyes! 417 00:22:31,920 --> 00:22:34,440 With respect, Thomas, I'm trying to answer the question, if you'll let me finish. 418 00:22:34,480 --> 00:22:37,560 Now, look here. A sacrifice was made for the greater good. 419 00:22:37,600 --> 00:22:39,600 We wanted her out of the house, didn't we? 420 00:22:39,640 --> 00:22:41,600 This has either killed her or scared her off. 421 00:22:41,640 --> 00:22:44,280 You don't just do that to someone. 422 00:22:45,400 --> 00:22:49,120 What kind of coward would push a lady out of the window? 423 00:22:49,160 --> 00:22:50,520 Now, steady on, Fanny. 424 00:22:50,560 --> 00:22:54,120 No, no, I won't, because I was pushed. 425 00:22:54,160 --> 00:22:55,720 You hear me? I was pushed. 426 00:22:55,760 --> 00:22:58,880 And I have never told a soul. 427 00:22:58,920 --> 00:23:01,280 It was my husband, George. 428 00:23:01,320 --> 00:23:06,200 - I caught him 'pon the groundskeeper... - Good Lord! 429 00:23:06,240 --> 00:23:08,360 ...with the butler 'pon him. 430 00:23:08,400 --> 00:23:09,840 - Oh! - Like a sandwich? 431 00:23:09,880 --> 00:23:10,920 A man-wich. 432 00:23:10,960 --> 00:23:12,840 It's actually known as a Moroccan tea party. 433 00:23:12,880 --> 00:23:15,680 - Guys! - Clearly, he didn't trust me 434 00:23:15,720 --> 00:23:19,440 with his sordid little secret, so he just did away with me. 435 00:23:19,480 --> 00:23:22,280 But he was wrong, wasn't he? He was very wrong. 436 00:23:22,320 --> 00:23:23,800 Because I have kept it, haven't I? 437 00:23:25,360 --> 00:23:27,480 Until now. Until now. 438 00:23:27,520 --> 00:23:29,680 - Oh! - I mean, I did know that. 439 00:23:29,720 --> 00:23:31,000 I watched all of that. 440 00:23:31,040 --> 00:23:32,480 - So did I. - Yeah, yeah. 441 00:23:32,520 --> 00:23:34,560 - I wish I had watched it. - Well, Fanny. 442 00:23:37,120 --> 00:23:40,760 That must have been a terrible burden to bear for all those years. 443 00:23:40,800 --> 00:23:42,480 Perhaps now that you've shared it... 444 00:23:43,560 --> 00:23:46,320 ...you'll be free of your nightly terrors. 445 00:23:46,360 --> 00:23:49,200 Oh, do you suppose so? 446 00:23:49,240 --> 00:23:50,960 I'm sure of it. 447 00:23:51,000 --> 00:23:53,120 Oh. 448 00:23:56,800 --> 00:23:58,120 Fanny! 449 00:23:59,240 --> 00:24:03,200 You see, Pat, what did I tell you? That's where talking gets you. Nowhere! 450 00:24:03,240 --> 00:24:05,560 It was silly of me to suggest it, really. 451 00:24:05,600 --> 00:24:08,200 Lesson learnt. What shall we do? 452 00:24:08,240 --> 00:24:11,080 I don't know. I'm not going to spend eternity listening to that racket 453 00:24:11,120 --> 00:24:12,560 at the same time every night. 454 00:24:18,840 --> 00:24:21,000 - It's worth a try. - Ah. 455 00:24:34,920 --> 00:24:38,280 - Much better. - Morning. 456 00:24:38,320 --> 00:24:39,880 Mornies! Good morning. 457 00:24:39,920 --> 00:24:43,360 Good day. Finally, things can get 458 00:24:43,400 --> 00:24:45,080 back to normal round here. 459 00:24:59,280 --> 00:25:02,880 - Shift over. - Can't I lie down? 460 00:25:02,920 --> 00:25:04,000 I'm so tired. 461 00:25:04,040 --> 00:25:06,640 - Poor you. - It's all right for you. 462 00:25:06,680 --> 00:25:08,400 You've been asleep for two weeks. 463 00:25:08,440 --> 00:25:10,320 It's called a coma. 464 00:25:10,360 --> 00:25:11,880 - Induced coma. - Oh. 465 00:25:13,040 --> 00:25:15,040 - Agh! - You all right? 466 00:25:15,080 --> 00:25:16,640 Yeah. 467 00:25:16,680 --> 00:25:18,880 I'm glad you didn't die. 468 00:25:20,000 --> 00:25:22,240 Well, technically I did, for a bit. 469 00:25:25,040 --> 00:25:26,680 Did I dream that house? 470 00:25:28,000 --> 00:25:29,400 I feel like I dreamt it all. 471 00:25:31,720 --> 00:25:33,280 Oh! 472 00:25:33,320 --> 00:25:34,600 Have you had the survey back? 473 00:25:34,640 --> 00:25:37,360 No. No, not yet. 474 00:25:37,400 --> 00:25:38,560 Hmm. 475 00:25:42,880 --> 00:25:46,800 Now, have her face the right way, you want the end with the milk, 476 00:25:46,840 --> 00:25:50,480 there, not the end for looking and chewing out of. 477 00:25:50,520 --> 00:25:53,800 You want to take this finger and this finger, 478 00:25:53,840 --> 00:25:58,400 gently but quickly, and that releases a big squirt of the stuff. 479 00:25:58,440 --> 00:26:00,920 - Good Lord! - Chuck some of the muck out. 480 00:26:00,960 --> 00:26:03,120 So, you can check then if the milk be smooth and white, 481 00:26:03,160 --> 00:26:04,520 not beige and lumpy. 482 00:26:06,000 --> 00:26:08,160 Oh, my goodness. They're coming back! 483 00:26:08,200 --> 00:26:09,200 What? 484 00:26:10,320 --> 00:26:14,280 Right, so you know how I said the survey hadn't come back? 485 00:26:14,320 --> 00:26:17,400 Oh, God. Oh, what did it say? 486 00:26:17,440 --> 00:26:19,280 How does she seem? Is it she OK? 487 00:26:19,320 --> 00:26:22,080 I don't know, they're not getting out of the carriage. 488 00:26:22,120 --> 00:26:24,720 - Well, there's good news and bad news. - OK. 489 00:26:24,760 --> 00:26:27,320 OK, OK. Well... Give me the good news... 490 00:26:27,360 --> 00:26:29,560 The bad news is that the repairs are extensive, 491 00:26:29,600 --> 00:26:31,080 like, big structural stuff - 492 00:26:31,120 --> 00:26:34,200 plumbing, electrics. Can't even begin to renovate this place 493 00:26:34,240 --> 00:26:36,520 without a huge amount of cash to do those things. 494 00:26:38,200 --> 00:26:40,640 - OK. Yeah... - So, the good news is I took out a loan! 495 00:26:40,680 --> 00:26:42,360 - What? - Yeah. I took out a loan. 496 00:26:42,400 --> 00:26:44,400 Some loans. Paid some deposits. 497 00:26:44,440 --> 00:26:46,320 Why didn't you tell me? 498 00:26:46,360 --> 00:26:50,000 Because I didn't want you to worry. This is your dream, right? 499 00:26:50,040 --> 00:26:52,320 I'm going to do everything I can to make it come true. 500 00:26:53,920 --> 00:26:56,760 Oh, they're already here. Come on, then. 501 00:27:00,120 --> 00:27:01,960 Hey. All right, mate. 502 00:27:02,000 --> 00:27:03,560 - How you doing? - Terry. 503 00:27:07,520 --> 00:27:10,360 So, we're going to inspect the site, make it safe. 504 00:27:10,400 --> 00:27:12,160 Everyone has to wear one of these for now. 505 00:27:12,200 --> 00:27:16,880 Insurance reasons, mainly, but, well...you just should. 506 00:27:16,920 --> 00:27:19,520 - Cool. - Cracking on, then. 507 00:27:20,600 --> 00:27:21,800 Exciting, isn't it? 508 00:27:21,840 --> 00:27:24,920 Huh? Why don't you go and have a lie-down and I'll grab your bags, yeah? 509 00:27:31,320 --> 00:27:32,760 You should be wearing a hard hat. 510 00:27:37,640 --> 00:27:41,760 Button House reduced to a tawdry boarding house. 511 00:27:41,800 --> 00:27:43,560 What will become of us? 512 00:27:43,600 --> 00:27:45,920 Oh, she spoke to me! She spoke to me! She saw me! 513 00:27:45,960 --> 00:27:47,800 - She spoke to me! - What? 514 00:27:47,840 --> 00:27:49,160 What the devil are you talking about? 515 00:27:53,040 --> 00:27:54,720 Oh, there you are. 516 00:27:54,760 --> 00:27:56,240 I thought you were getting some rest. 517 00:27:57,840 --> 00:27:59,680 No turning back now. 518 00:27:59,720 --> 00:28:02,000 - What if we made a mistake? - What? 519 00:28:02,040 --> 00:28:04,680 What if this was a bad idea and we should have just sold it? 520 00:28:04,720 --> 00:28:06,320 Don't say that. This is a great idea. 521 00:28:06,360 --> 00:28:08,480 It's going to take a lot of work, but we can do it. 522 00:28:10,360 --> 00:28:11,480 Mike! 523 00:28:11,520 --> 00:28:13,080 You're terrified, and I get it. 524 00:28:13,120 --> 00:28:14,960 Mike! 525 00:28:16,000 --> 00:28:18,120 I get it. I'm scared too. 526 00:28:18,160 --> 00:28:20,840 This house and what we're doing, it's a huge challenge, 527 00:28:20,880 --> 00:28:23,240 and who knows what we're going to have to deal with on the way? 528 00:28:23,280 --> 00:28:25,400 But, in the end, we've got each other. 529 00:28:26,400 --> 00:28:27,600 It's just us and this big old house. 530 00:28:27,640 --> 00:28:29,800 There's nothing to be scared of, is there? 38780

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