Original subtitles

Welcome to the Victoria Hotel.

I'm sure you'd be very happy here.

Thank you for choosing us.

My name is Farzana.

If you need anything at all during your stay, just ask.

Okay?

I'm going to need your name, your signature,

and your passport number right here.

Thank you.

Thank you so much.

Here you go. Your room keys.

Alright.

Excuse me.

Yes.

You have room?

Yes, of course. The price is 80 pounds per night.

Breakfast included.

You'll have to pay 80 pounds in advance.

What?! 80 quids?

Yes.

That's too much.

One minute.

The last vacant room has finally been booked.

Let's go home, chop-chop!

I've informed Vijay we're leaving. Let's go.

One of the rooms is still vacant and is blocked by your dear son.

He has his own room, right?

It's in the next bloody lane.

That's his office, Shanno.

He cannot practice law sitting at home.

What practice?

He doesn't have a license. What will he do?

Anyways, what has Bilal done in the last ten years, except for splurge money?

Okay, fine.

Just don't smoke in the kitchen.

Please.

Thank you.

Do you want some water?

No, thank you.

Should I make some chai?

No.

Is there any calculation that needs to be done?

I can help you with it.

You'll never feel the need to use a calculator when I'm around.

This belongs to my mother.

We'll have to get a thicker chain for this.

It's heavy.

I'll go pay for the room.

Later, I have to go meet the lawyer for Grandpa's visa.

It may take a while.

Karan!

Should we...

call up Grandpa once?

It's 2:00 a.m. in India.

You haven't slept a wink since we got on the plane.

Get some rest.

We'll talk tomorrow, okay?

Grandpa, I swear, you make the best Chai in the world!

Don't make excuses.

I know what you're doing.

Don't try to flatter me.

Grandpa, Karan Sharma is the best choice.

But, there should be someone who could guarantee that the boy's genuine.

But, Grandpa, there is!

Besthusbands.com

They are the guarantors.

What is wrong with the proposals I got you?

Hey, you're doing the same thing again!

- Grandpa. - Here, hold this.

- I like your tea better. - No, hold it.

There are better, eligible boys,

and most importantly, we have mutuals.

Grandpa, Karan is a Kashmiri.

He wants us to move to London with him,

and the best part is that we'll be staying together there.

So for me, Karan is the best choice.

London?

How will we manage things there?

We will manage.

We don't even get tea leaves there.

- Grandpa! - What do they call it there?

Tea is often made by dipping those things...

- Do you mean tea bags? - Yes!

One shall see the truth of life And my blessings are with you

One shall see the truth of life And my blessings are with you...

Hello, Uncle.

Hello, darling. How come you're here?

- Tara, what are you doing here? - Actually...

And what's this?

Why haven't you started applying henna yet?

Putting on bridal henna takes a lot of time.

- Go get ready... - Just a second, Auntie.

Uncle,

whilst selling the house and getting the money transferred to Karan,

I didn't get a chance to thank the two of you.

Why thank us, my dear?

He's not your grandpa alone.

He's ours too.

You won't even realize when days go by.

Hey, Tara.

Get going, dear.

- Do you have Gurmeher's number? - I'll be right back.

- Yes, I do. - Please give it to her.

- Go put on henna. - Yes, of course.

Everything is going smoothly.

Lord, bless Tara with only happiness.

Sorry, the service requested is not available.

Karan, please pick up!

You've reached a number that has been disconnected

or is no longer in service.

You've reached a number

- that has been disconnected... - Karan, please...

or is no longer in service.

Actually...

My husband, Karan Sharma...

We checked in tonight.

He is fair and has black hair.

He was wearing a green jacket.

He left five hours ago.

Hasn't he returned yet?

No, madam.

Ma'am, are you okay?

You've reached a number that has been disconnected

or is no longer in service.

No reply.

Stupid!

Never picks up.

- Tea. - Thank you.

What happened, sister?

Room number 216.

No one has answered the door in four days,

and the room hasn't been cleaned.

Good God, sister.

What if someone is dead...

Did someone die in that room?

Oh, God! No one's dead.

No, sister.

Bodies reek a couple of days

after a person dies.

Open it.

Come on open it.

What if someone sees us?

You're the older one, sister.

So what if I am older?

You're pretty handy with the knife in the kitchen.

Come on. Open it.

About time.

Billu, my child.

The apple of my eye.

You are strong.

You are very very strong.

Yes, yes.

And you must close this key.

- Okay, Mom. - Please...

- Thanks. - My darling son.

Thank you.

Sorry madam, I am coming in.

How can you just get in here?

Get out.

I am sorry you'll have to vacate the room immediately.

I'll take your suitcase down for you.

Please leave!

I am sorry. You're the one who'll have to leave.

And,

I'll need 400 pounds from you.

So, the 400 pounds...

are you going to make the payment here or downstairs?

I am not going anywhere.

What if my husband comes back?

We've tried his phone, and we've tried his address.

It's all bogus.

He's not gonna come back, I'm...

I'm sorry, he's not coming back.

The money...

I don't have it.

I can call the police. Should I?

Go ahead.

You won't get your money even if I go to jail,

because I don't have any.

How will I go back?

I gave all my money to him.

I sold my house.

Please don't throw me out of here.

I'm sure my husband will come by! Please!

Hey, Mike. How are you?

But, I have no place to go.

I don't even have an address he could drop me off at.

How do you know he won't come back?

I know because...

this is pretty common.

Mike, don't charge her. It's on me.

No, thank you.

Oh, beloved one from a faraway land

Offer him sweet apples

What did you do on the way

Tell me honestly, O beloved

Tell me honestly, O beloved

Don't be sad, Tarachand.

Chin up.

Beloved...

Rise above all

Daughters have to leave someday Like a bird leaves the nest

And rise above all

Daughters have to leave someday Like a bird leaves the nest

Leaving your mansions And your father's affection behind

Leaving your mansions And your father's affection behind

And move out with her beloved...

Hello.

Grandpa.

How are you, my child?

I've been trying to reach Karan's phone for so long.

Didn't he buy you a phone yet?

No, he...

Listen, my phone has a low balance.

So, you keep calling and texting me.

Are you okay?

I am okay, child.

It's just that I miss you a lot.

Take care, my monkey.

Daughters have to leave someday Like a bird leaves the nest

Daughters have to leave someday Like a bird leaves the nest

Gurmeher Kaur.

She is a good friend of ours.

Here, keep this number handy.

If you ever feel homesick in London, just call her.

Just mention your uncle's name...

and she'll be there for you in the blink of an eye.

Rise above all

Rise above all...

- Bye! - Bye!

- Hello, doctor. - Shut up!

How are you?

I am done.

Not so friendly doctor.

Let me see, what we can do for you.

Hey, light it.

I see.

Give it to me.

Give it.

How's your Sunday going?

Why do our families

destroy our Sundays and then tag it as "family time"?

Any Gujarati they meet on the streets...

is invited over for a free checkup.

I am fed up.

Fuck, man.

- Only one person can fix my mood... - Hey!

Stay away from it.

Let's go there tomorrow.

I really miss being there.

You pervert!

It's just been three days since you went there.

So sad.

I am in love, dude.

You won't get it.

You don't have a heart, bloody loser!

Give it here.

Just pick me up on time tomorrow night. No excuses.

I like how you boss around me.

And can't say a word in front of your dad.

Get lost.

Why don't you have a backseat on this?

Because she's a one-man type of girl.

I wish she had a one-woman type of man.

- Did you get one? - Get lost.

- Hey! - Get out.

- Get lost. - Get lost.

Yeah, get lost!

Piggy!

I'm coming!

Yes?

Gurmeher Auntie?

Does she live here?

No.

But...

Yes?

Gurmeher Auntie?

Who's that? What's that?

- She lives here? - No, not at all.

No, actually, Uncle Balli gave me her address...

One second.

No, love.

You have horrendous taste in clothing, okay?

You're ugly.

Yes?

See, this is house number 12.

No, okay.

There is no Gurmeher here.

You have the wrong address, okay?

So, stop banging on my door,

take your bags and the ones under your eyes, and leave.

Who asked for Gurmeher?

- Auntie are you... - I am Gurmeher.

Call me, Daisy.

Auntie, I just arrived from India.

Uncle Balli gave me your address and your number.

Balli?

Get started with your meal.

- I'll be there right after you. - Who is Balli?

Get going!

I wanna know.

How do you know Balli?

Uncle Balli and Auntie Sonu gave me your number.

They are your best friends from Karnal.

Yes. Just a minute.

Don't you have patience?

Keep the calculations ready. I'll call you back.

How is Balli?

He is fine.

He told me that you own a restaurant.

Is it closed?

It's closed.

It opens only in the evening.

I...

Actually, Auntie...

Uncle Balli told me to call you if I ever felt homesick.

He loves me like a father.

Yes...

- Auntie no! Please, I don't need this. - Keep it.

- No, Auntie... - Keep it. Bye.

- Bye. Take care. - No, Auntie. Hear me out...

Just a minute. Hold on.

Save me, Lord.

You'll die if you don't tell me, right?

How would I know the sum of 561 and 247?

That'll be 808.

The total would be 808.

I had 1100.

So you tell me the difference?

The difference would be 292.

Find out where the 292 quids disappeared and give me a callback.

Or, I'll have to deduct it from your pay.

Do you understand, you idiot?

That was my accountant.

He's a total nut.

What were you saying, child?

Auntie I...

I...

What did you say your name was?

- Tara. - Tara.

Quiet everyone!

Anybody dare talk about work on this table!

She is here to have a meal.

Let her eat, then she'll leave.

Nobody talks about work.

- Zip. - Yeah.

But, that's also because Daisy here...

- has a secret. - What secret?

Daisy here has been naughty.

Do you want to get beaten?

- Come, Tara. - She's here.

Come. Tara, come.

Tara.

- Hi, girl. - Hey.

Hi, Tara.

Hi.

Sorry.

Tara, have your food.

Come on, start.

- Oh, wow! - Yeah, it's...

- Turn your back... - Seriously.

You can give it out.

Wow! What beautiful bangles, Tara.

You know, that means she's a newlywed.

You must be really missing Indian food.

Babe, be careful.

Carbs go straight to your hips.

You just got married, right?

Careful?

Let us tell you a little something about men.

- Oh yeah, because you know so much. - Yeah, because you know...

The way to get a guy isn't solely through his stomach.

I think you get it.

You understand.

She knows.

She looks like a smart girl.

Smart girl.

So tell us, smart girl,

which way is it?

Ritz, pass the salad.

Salad?

No!

Tara is not in the mood for salad.

What she wants and what she is craving,

is something non-veg.

She knows that.

I'll leave, Auntie.

Finish your food.

No, I'm done.

- Wait, Tara. - She is leaving.

- What is wrong with you guys? - She is leaving.

Who talks like this?

No. Stop it.

Tara, wait!

Listen to me, dear.

Where are you going? Get inside.

I don't have anywhere to go, Auntie!

This honeymoon has turned into a living hell for me.

I spent the night at the bus stop.

Even if I tell Grandpa about it, he won't get me.

I spent all my money on the wedding,

and Karan fled away with my money and jewelry.

Stop crying.

He left me.

I got thrown out of the hotel, Auntie.

What will I tell the police?

What do I do? Where do I go?

I don't understand.

Okay. Don't feel awful.

Tell me what exactly happened.

I tried to find someone on besthusbands.com.

I found Karan.

Too much carbs, too much protein, too much make-up,

too much attitude.

Son, how do you decipher someone's attitude from the photo?

Why don't you try meeting one of them for a change?

There is nothing wrong with meeting them.

I don't want to meet them.

My bride's already parked in the garage.

- I see. So, is your bike your bride? - Yes.

Okay then. Ask her to do your laundry, iron your clothes,

and make her cook high-protein food for you.

Because we're not going to anymore.

You don't understand, son.

You need that sort of a wife.

You know, the...

homemaker type.

We're saying this for your own benefit, son.

And anyway, you're not that young anymore.

You'll be turning 35 soon.

I just turned 32.

Oh God!

You're almost 40!

- When will you get married if not now? - Auntie...

Not until you guys keep pandering to his needs.

Grandma, can you please explain to me,

how these three women with unsuccessful marriages,

are forcing me into a marriage?

You know what happens when a man in this family comes under pressure, right?

There's a possibility of two things happening.

Either divorce...

or...

Well, there goes our happy Sunday.

Look, Tara.

I just want to help you.

Okay?

Whatever you see here tonight...

or whatever you experience tonight,

you won't call anyone in Delhi or tell anyone anything

without asking me first.

Understood?

Yes.

But...

Auntie!

Welcome to Gilassy Bar.

Who can reveal your true self to you?

And your doings?

Your doings...

Your doings...

Who can reveal your true self to you?

I'm here to put A price tag on myself again

Let me settle this for once and for all

Win the battle today

Because my body is like metal

Let me settle this for once and for all

Win the battle today

Because my body is like metal

Feels like a masculine night

So speak your heart and tell it right

Honey don't be shy-shy

Or your fate may twist and make you cry

Feels like a masculine night

So speak your heart and tell it right

Honey don't be shy-shy

I am going to wring them dry

Drop all inhibitions

All the hearts beating in here

I am going to break them all tonight

Only Raja is capable of doing this job

A lullaby for my dear kid There's a treat in a bowl for you

Savor it quickly What are you waiting for?

A lullaby for my dear kid There's a treat in a bowl for you

Savor it quickly What are you waiting for?

You know I don't like such things, right?

Auntie!

Is this what you do?!

What do you mean by that?

All of them are boys...

What's up, ladies? Need to pee!

Need to pee!

They are gays, so?

Would it be okay if those were girls dancing with boys instead?

Tell me?

Look, Tara.

We only live once.

All we have is one chance...

and the right to live our life on our own terms.

Looking at the state you're in right now...

I thought of helping you out and giving you a place to stay here.

Me?

Liv, hurry up, girl!

We have to go!

Coming.

Are you for real, Auntie?

I would rather die than do any of this.

I wanted to hire you as an accountant.

You're really good with numbers.

Think about it.

- Happy birthday to you! - Happy birthday to you!

- Happy birthday to you! - You won't wait for Billu.

- No! Come on, blow out the candles! - Happy birthday, dear Zoya...

Ali...

Ali Baba and forty thieves

It was a total boys club

Trapped inside a cave

Playing hide and seek

The light in the cave was dim

It was dim...

The cave had a password That said open sim-sim

The light in the cave was dim

The cave had a password That said open sim-sim

In a blanket of darkness

The stars were shining twinkle-twinkle

Shooting stars will streak the night

We will find love without a fight

We will stop at nothing

Find all your cash and make you splurge

I'll break all the bulbs

Shatter all the bottles

If you don't come on the floor

I'll break the floor

Only Raja can do this job

A lullaby for my dear kid There's a treat in a bowl for you

Savor it quickly What are you waiting for?

A lullaby for my dear kid There's a treat in a bowl for you

Savor it quickly What are you waiting for?

I'm here to put A price tag on myself again

Jiggy.

Jiggy.

Jiggy, you pervert!

Hi.

Okay, this, this is tacky.

What is tacky?

This.

This...

Is that how you call someone?

I'm sorry.

Actually, I wanted to ask you something...

Looking for this?

- Is that... - Your chain.

Please, come on.

You guys get going. Come on.

I wanted to ask you out for a cup of coffee...

- No. - Please?

- Come on, leave. - No!

- Just one coffee. - I said leave!

Jiggy, what's wrong with you?

Jiggy, leave.

Go home.

- Americano? - No.

Jiggy, okay, you need to go home.

Have some water...

No! No, Jiggy.

We don't beg.

One chance. One coffee, please.

Please one. Anything.

It's all over now.

You're lucky...

that he's fallen for you.

Ritz. Ritz, I'll be back.

Just one chance.

Just one chance.

If you don't mind,

can I ask a question?

I mind.

How will I sleep here?

Okay...

First, you do this,

and then, you do this.

Don't you guys feel you're doing something wrong?

Doing what, Tara?

I am not doing this. This is who I am.

Maybe, you'll get it someday.

Take my advice and stay.

I cannot stay here.

Okay, then go.

Call an Uber and go to the airport.

But do one thing.

Treat yourself to a business class ticket.

You have the money, right?

Look...

I know you had a tremendous culture shock today.

I can understand what you're feeling.

Trust me. I get it, babe. I do.

But at least make some money before going back to India.

Okay?

Now don't cry.

You're too pretty to cry, okay?

So go to sleep.

Now that I've told you how, okay?

And, I'll speak to you in the morning.

I need my beauty sleep.

Because I am a Queen,

and deserve to be sleeping like one.

Hello, gents. How are you?

Oh, you!

Alright.

Okay.

Okay.

I get that something's up.

I am getting a vibe.

So before you guys start...

can I get a coffee?

All you got to do is press a button.

So do it or is that too much for you to do?

This boy is the limit.

Noor!

What?

What happened?

Sorry?

Do you even know what you're apologizing for?

How does it matter, Mom?

How does it matter?

I must have said something or done something.

Or wait a minute...

it could be something I didn't say or didn't do.

So either way, I'll have to say sorry.

Because you guys own this show.

Brother Bilal, it was Mom's birthday.

Shit!

Zoya waited for you to come.

Mom, why didn't you call me?

Did you check your phone?

I get so many unnecessary missed calls from you all day.

- How would I know? - Of course,

because we've nothing better to do than call you all day.

Actually, Auntie, you may be onto something there.

I feel the same way.

How does this fit into this?

Bilal, there should be certain occasions,

when you give priority to all of us.

I am sorry, Auntie Zoya.

And happy birthday.

Belated.

Okay.

So, guys, let's all of us go out for dinner.

We'll go somewhere posh. I'll wear a suit.

Just the way she likes it. Okay, Auntie?

No, son.

Let it go, Bilal.

See? She's right.

I agree with her.

I think we should not make a fuss about it.

Billu, Zoya was really looking forward to it.

As if he cares.

Guys...

Sorry, but can I eat this now?

Sorry.

Sorry!

Sorry!

What does he have to give this family except for "sorry"?

I couldn't show up, that is the problem.

Now that I want to take you guys out, is also a problem.

What do you women want?

Wait a second. You guys to go out for dinner, right?

There you go.

Here. That's for you.

For you!

For you!

Dinner's on me tonight.

Go knock yourself out!

Bilal!

There's a limit to being rude.

There, look over there.

Did you check in here?

Move.

I'm sure it's somewhere here.

Search for it properly.

Where are you going, useless?

Save me, God.

You're staying, right, Tara?

I have no other place to go to, Auntie.

Don't worry.

Don't worry. You'll have a lot of opportunities to run away.

I can pay you 1000 pounds every month

as a salary.

Okay?

Tara, could you show me your visa?

- Here. - Let me see.

Damn!

This is a six-month tourist visa.

- So? - This won't help, Tara.

That rascal didn't even get you a spouse visa.

What kind of a guy is he?

Well, I'll figure it out.

I'll pay you in cash for the first few months, okay?

But, I'll have to deduct 100 pounds from it.

For work permit, child.

- I hope that's okay. - Yeah, that's okay.

Okay, fine.

Greetings.

Good morning.

Hello.

Coffee?

Have we met?

No.

No?

- Yes. - No!

Did they not show you a photo of me?

No.

Well, I've seen o