All language subtitles for 2 Broke Girls s04e18 Taste Test

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,167 --> 00:00:03,497 Oleg, the people at table two want to know 2 00:00:03,587 --> 00:00:04,667 what's in the veggie burger. 3 00:00:04,839 --> 00:00:07,469 No. They don't. 4 00:00:10,803 --> 00:00:12,893 Ah, that's fine. They wanted refills, 5 00:00:12,971 --> 00:00:15,311 so I'm probably not gonna go back there anyway. 6 00:00:15,391 --> 00:00:16,641 Where's Max? 7 00:00:16,725 --> 00:00:18,225 This plate has been here so long, 8 00:00:18,309 --> 00:00:20,649 the salmon is turning into Salmonella. 9 00:00:23,149 --> 00:00:25,649 She took a break with the new dishwasher. 10 00:00:26,609 --> 00:00:28,649 Max, I thought you slipped out the back. 11 00:00:28,903 --> 00:00:31,913 He did for a minute but I popped him back in. 12 00:00:36,954 --> 00:00:39,794 This just in, work is so much more fun 13 00:00:39,874 --> 00:00:41,424 when you're sleeping with a co-worker. 14 00:00:42,625 --> 00:00:46,455 Max, that was good. It was five Hail Marys good. 15 00:00:46,546 --> 00:00:48,876 I think we made these dishes dirtier. 16 00:00:51,134 --> 00:00:52,554 Max, he's cute, 17 00:00:52,636 --> 00:00:55,346 but how can you even stay hard with that accent? 18 00:00:56,598 --> 00:01:00,598 "Come here, Max. I wanna hump you a wee bit." 19 00:01:03,439 --> 00:01:04,939 What can I say, 20 00:01:05,024 --> 00:01:07,364 I always had a thing for the guy on the box of Lucky Charms. 21 00:01:08,359 --> 00:01:10,779 (THEME MUSIC PLAYS) 22 00:01:10,945 --> 00:01:12,355 (CASH REGISTER RINGS) 23 00:01:20,831 --> 00:01:23,381 Hey, everybody. 24 00:01:25,418 --> 00:01:28,168 Look, I got me a Fitbit. 25 00:01:29,006 --> 00:01:31,876 12, 13, 14, 15... 26 00:01:31,966 --> 00:01:33,466 (BREATHES RAPIDLY) 27 00:01:33,551 --> 00:01:35,011 Only 200,000 more steps 28 00:01:35,094 --> 00:01:38,434 before I get a bit more fit for my wedding. 29 00:01:38,848 --> 00:01:40,058 That's impressive. 30 00:01:40,141 --> 00:01:43,401 I couldn't even make it through 12 steps. 31 00:01:45,188 --> 00:01:48,228 Hey, Max. How's my maid of honor? 32 00:01:48,317 --> 00:01:53,107 Hey, Caroline. How's my run-of-the-mill wedding guest? 33 00:01:54,781 --> 00:01:56,081 I'm doing great. 34 00:01:56,408 --> 00:01:57,488 Did that sound convincing? 35 00:01:57,575 --> 00:01:58,785 'Cause I've been practicing it 36 00:01:58,953 --> 00:02:00,913 in the bathroom mirror for an hour every morning. 37 00:02:01,037 --> 00:02:04,457 I know, I've got to stop sitting on the toilet while you do that. 38 00:02:05,543 --> 00:02:08,423 Max, let's talk bridesmaid dresses. 39 00:02:08,503 --> 00:02:10,133 I don't care, I'll wear anything. 40 00:02:10,256 --> 00:02:13,086 I wore a Greyhound Bus driver's uniform to my prom. 41 00:02:14,050 --> 00:02:15,760 I was coming straight from work. 42 00:02:16,427 --> 00:02:18,717 Well, I have decided 43 00:02:18,806 --> 00:02:21,596 to wear Grandma Kachinsky's wedding gown. 44 00:02:21,975 --> 00:02:25,095 Yeah, all of the women in my family wore it. 45 00:02:25,228 --> 00:02:27,608 Everyone except aunts Svetti and Letti 46 00:02:27,689 --> 00:02:30,399 'cause, well, they're attached at the abdomen. 47 00:02:31,985 --> 00:02:33,275 There she is. 48 00:02:33,653 --> 00:02:36,573 The hot sauce for my Huevos Mancheros. 49 00:02:41,662 --> 00:02:44,122 Hey, Sophie, baby, I got you what you want. 50 00:02:44,206 --> 00:02:46,666 Oleg, no one wants hepatitis. 51 00:02:49,043 --> 00:02:50,053 It's official. 52 00:02:50,170 --> 00:02:52,840 Our wedding's gonna be in The Times. 53 00:02:53,299 --> 00:02:55,879 Oleg, how are you gonna be in The Times? 54 00:02:56,093 --> 00:02:57,683 The Times tends to be picky 55 00:02:57,760 --> 00:03:00,640 and you tend to be more "picky your nose." 56 00:03:00,931 --> 00:03:04,811 You know, my second wedding made The Times. 57 00:03:04,977 --> 00:03:08,557 'Cause my first wife showed up and shot me in the leg. 58 00:03:09,939 --> 00:03:11,029 (CELLPHONE CHIMES) 59 00:03:11,942 --> 00:03:16,492 That's Vlanka, my sister. She's my other bridesmaid. 60 00:03:16,947 --> 00:03:18,737 Yeah, we're not that close 61 00:03:18,949 --> 00:03:20,579 but I feel bad for her 62 00:03:20,700 --> 00:03:23,700 'cause she's one of those adults with freckles. 63 00:03:27,248 --> 00:03:29,628 Max, you're gonna be in The Times. 64 00:03:29,835 --> 00:03:33,625 In The Times, wearing God knows what Sophie will pick. 65 00:03:33,881 --> 00:03:38,431 I mean, she has a drawer full of diamond tiaras for the gym. 66 00:03:41,096 --> 00:03:43,056 Hello, what are you two talking about? 67 00:03:43,223 --> 00:03:45,893 Deciding which tables to ignore? 68 00:03:45,975 --> 00:03:47,935 We're talking about Sophie's taste. 69 00:03:48,062 --> 00:03:51,402 Oh, bitch, please. 70 00:03:51,481 --> 00:03:52,441 Come on. 71 00:03:52,983 --> 00:03:56,073 My morning fiber cookie has better taste than Sophie. 72 00:03:58,237 --> 00:04:00,487 Girls, Vlanka's out. 73 00:04:00,699 --> 00:04:03,079 She has an attitude and freckles. 74 00:04:03,201 --> 00:04:05,961 Yeah. I mean, that's too far. 75 00:04:07,122 --> 00:04:10,752 So, Caroline, congratulations. 76 00:04:10,960 --> 00:04:13,250 You're my new bridesmaid. 77 00:04:20,093 --> 00:04:22,853 Okay, I found a bridesmaid's dress that I like. 78 00:04:22,930 --> 00:04:24,350 But the only way we can afford it 79 00:04:24,430 --> 00:04:27,100 is if I sell you to that Armenian guy on Craigslist. 80 00:04:27,725 --> 00:04:31,435 No way. I get sick of hummus after four bites. 81 00:04:31,562 --> 00:04:33,862 Max, we have to take charge of this. 82 00:04:33,983 --> 00:04:35,733 Because whatever dress Sophie picks 83 00:04:35,858 --> 00:04:37,238 is like a Tyler Perry movie. 84 00:04:37,403 --> 00:04:40,913 I don't have to see it to know it's gonna be awful. 85 00:04:43,742 --> 00:04:45,742 We'll find something classy, and beautiful 86 00:04:45,827 --> 00:04:48,287 and just shove it down her throat. 87 00:04:48,622 --> 00:04:52,132 Who's shoving what down whom? 88 00:04:52,543 --> 00:04:55,843 And if you don't have a story, I do. 89 00:04:58,132 --> 00:05:00,842 John, Max and I got roped into being bridesmaids. 90 00:05:01,175 --> 00:05:05,305 Stop. You had me at rope. You lost me at bridesmaids. 91 00:05:06,139 --> 00:05:08,059 I'll be at the hostess stand, looking at dresses 92 00:05:08,225 --> 00:05:09,935 and silently wishing for an asteroid 93 00:05:10,019 --> 00:05:11,229 to wipe us off the planet. 94 00:05:12,021 --> 00:05:13,311 If wishes made things happen, 95 00:05:13,396 --> 00:05:16,266 we'd been in the middle of a zombie apocalypse right now. 96 00:05:18,401 --> 00:05:19,531 Hey, girls. 97 00:05:19,610 --> 00:05:21,360 My dress just arrived from Poland 98 00:05:21,447 --> 00:05:23,567 and I'm busting for you to see it. 99 00:05:23,740 --> 00:05:26,950 See it while I eat one of your $14 puddings. 100 00:05:28,245 --> 00:05:30,245 Sophie, I've been looking at color choices 101 00:05:30,329 --> 00:05:32,579 and how would you feel about us in a nude? 102 00:05:32,915 --> 00:05:34,375 Max could go nude 103 00:05:34,459 --> 00:05:37,799 but you don't have the rack to pull it off. 104 00:05:38,963 --> 00:05:40,513 Does anyone have a knife? 105 00:05:44,887 --> 00:05:46,177 Max, why do you have a switchblade 106 00:05:46,262 --> 00:05:47,682 to work in a dessert bar? 107 00:05:48,014 --> 00:05:50,814 My mother always told me to carry protection. 108 00:05:53,103 --> 00:05:55,903 Wait 'til you see Grandma Kachinsky's dress. 109 00:05:56,230 --> 00:05:58,270 They don't make them like they used to. 110 00:05:58,358 --> 00:06:01,238 You know, forced gypsy labor is illegal now. 111 00:06:03,072 --> 00:06:05,072 Here we go. 112 00:06:08,619 --> 00:06:10,329 -(GROANING) -(COUGHING) 113 00:06:10,411 --> 00:06:14,001 Sophie, was your grandma the Crypt Keeper? 114 00:06:17,086 --> 00:06:18,586 What's going on out here? 115 00:06:18,670 --> 00:06:20,800 What's all that white powder in the air? 116 00:06:21,005 --> 00:06:24,925 I'm trying to run a restaurant, not an 80's disco. 117 00:06:25,009 --> 00:06:27,219 Oh, put a sock in it. 118 00:06:27,387 --> 00:06:30,677 I'm buying one of your freaking overpriced puddings. 119 00:06:33,519 --> 00:06:37,979 I'd get mad but I'm mildly attracted to you right now. 120 00:06:38,774 --> 00:06:41,244 Just mildly? 121 00:06:41,610 --> 00:06:44,400 I mean, now I'm getting mad. 122 00:06:45,113 --> 00:06:46,533 Sorry. Wedding drama. 123 00:06:46,656 --> 00:06:48,446 Her dress just fell completely to pieces 124 00:06:48,533 --> 00:06:51,333 like I'm assuming I'll be doing in the near future. 125 00:06:52,161 --> 00:06:55,621 Whatever you need bridal, go to Rosenfeld's in Brooklyn. 126 00:06:55,706 --> 00:06:58,456 That's where I got my dress when I was broke and straight. 127 00:07:00,461 --> 00:07:02,341 So you weren't always into women? 128 00:07:02,463 --> 00:07:04,173 Of course I was. 129 00:07:04,298 --> 00:07:06,968 Except those three years in Scientology. 130 00:07:09,971 --> 00:07:12,311 Well, it looks like the three of us 131 00:07:12,432 --> 00:07:15,272 are going to go dress shopping now. Yeah. 132 00:07:15,519 --> 00:07:17,809 And, you know, I got to go wash my hands 133 00:07:17,896 --> 00:07:20,896 'cause they're covered in old lady DNA. 134 00:07:24,278 --> 00:07:26,448 Well, that's that. 135 00:07:26,612 --> 00:07:28,162 Shopping with Sophie is like 136 00:07:28,240 --> 00:07:30,370 when I worked in a Thai massage parlor. 137 00:07:30,492 --> 00:07:33,252 We are going down. 138 00:07:37,331 --> 00:07:39,421 Not if we go before Sophie 139 00:07:39,500 --> 00:07:41,750 and hide every ugly bridesmaid's dress 140 00:07:41,836 --> 00:07:42,746 that Sophie would like. 141 00:07:43,254 --> 00:07:45,474 If she can't see them, she can't make us wear them. 142 00:07:45,966 --> 00:07:47,586 How did you come up with that so fast? 143 00:07:47,968 --> 00:07:49,428 It's the same plan I used in 2010 144 00:07:49,511 --> 00:07:51,681 when I was a bridesmaid for Chelsea Clinton. 145 00:07:52,014 --> 00:07:55,234 Bad dress and then her father followed me into the coat room. 146 00:07:59,353 --> 00:08:03,483 Oh, wow. Look at this place. It reminds me of that movie. 147 00:08:03,567 --> 00:08:06,317 - Bridesmaids? -No, Nightmare on Elm Street. 148 00:08:07,904 --> 00:08:10,034 I don't know what you're worried about, Caroline. 149 00:08:10,156 --> 00:08:11,776 I think they're all quite lovely. 150 00:08:11,992 --> 00:08:15,372 Nash, please. You're a poor person from Ireland. 151 00:08:17,122 --> 00:08:18,752 I'll ask your opinion when I need to know 152 00:08:18,831 --> 00:08:21,421 where to go to get free leg braces. 153 00:08:23,336 --> 00:08:27,586 You were right, Max. She can be a real "B" sometimes. 154 00:08:27,757 --> 00:08:30,127 I'm sorry, but I don't even know why he's here. 155 00:08:30,677 --> 00:08:32,967 Bonin' O'Brien here... 156 00:08:36,432 --> 00:08:38,642 is gonna distract the sales lady 157 00:08:38,769 --> 00:08:40,439 while we hide the ugly dresses. 158 00:08:41,104 --> 00:08:43,984 -Hello, ladies. -Same plan. 159 00:08:45,734 --> 00:08:47,194 Who's the lucky bride? 160 00:08:47,402 --> 00:08:50,112 Or should I say, who's the lucky cradle robber? 161 00:08:50,197 --> 00:08:51,867 (LAUGHS) 162 00:08:51,948 --> 00:08:53,198 Don't mind me. 163 00:08:53,283 --> 00:08:55,163 It's just my crazy sense of humor. 164 00:08:55,244 --> 00:08:57,044 Oh, the ladies here love it. 165 00:08:57,245 --> 00:08:59,115 The call me "Crazy Carl." 166 00:08:59,288 --> 00:09:01,498 "Did you hear what Crazy Carl said?" 167 00:09:02,918 --> 00:09:05,668 They just love it. 168 00:09:05,879 --> 00:09:06,999 I'm Caroline. 169 00:09:07,089 --> 00:09:09,129 This is Max and he isn't the groom. 170 00:09:09,216 --> 00:09:12,336 No, no, no. He's single and gay. 171 00:09:12,927 --> 00:09:16,257 Yes. So gay, he got kicked out of One Direction. 172 00:09:21,061 --> 00:09:22,941 Why don't you two walk off somewhere 173 00:09:23,020 --> 00:09:25,860 and share poignant coming-out stories. 174 00:09:26,066 --> 00:09:28,356 -Go. -But Max-- 175 00:09:28,442 --> 00:09:30,952 Oh, you heard the women, go. 176 00:09:31,196 --> 00:09:36,696 Can do. Ladies, look around, we'll be back in about a month. 177 00:09:36,784 --> 00:09:39,874 Tahiti anyone? I'm just Crazy Carl. 178 00:09:39,955 --> 00:09:41,455 The ladies love it. 179 00:09:43,457 --> 00:09:45,917 Bridesmaid's dresses should be called what they are. 180 00:09:46,003 --> 00:09:49,133 Really expensive donations to Goodwill. 181 00:09:49,213 --> 00:09:52,723 -Is this one bad? -No. That's a Vera Wang. 182 00:09:53,051 --> 00:09:58,141 But this is a very wrong. Hide it. 183 00:09:59,557 --> 00:10:02,517 And it's evil twin. 184 00:10:02,852 --> 00:10:04,102 (CHUCKLES) 185 00:10:04,229 --> 00:10:07,149 I didn't know hazmat suits came with feathers. 186 00:10:09,525 --> 00:10:11,645 Oh, my God. 187 00:10:11,820 --> 00:10:14,740 This the worst thing I've ever seen. 188 00:10:14,905 --> 00:10:17,115 And I've seen a prostitute change her tampon 189 00:10:17,200 --> 00:10:19,120 on the sidewalk. 190 00:10:19,619 --> 00:10:21,749 Who are you calling a prostitute? 191 00:10:28,211 --> 00:10:32,091 This, we've got to hide. I can't get this dress off. 192 00:10:32,341 --> 00:10:33,471 Just tell it you work at Google 193 00:10:33,549 --> 00:10:35,429 and you're thinking of settling down. 194 00:10:35,509 --> 00:10:38,099 Lift it up. Lift it up. Dump it back there. 195 00:10:38,304 --> 00:10:43,064 Stop. You put Butterscotch Betty down. 196 00:10:43,476 --> 00:10:46,226 Oh, we were just looking for a price tag. 197 00:10:46,395 --> 00:10:48,145 I know what's going on here. 198 00:10:48,273 --> 00:10:49,773 You're hiding the good dresses 199 00:10:49,857 --> 00:10:51,397 to make sure no one else can get them 200 00:10:51,485 --> 00:10:53,945 at our annual half-off sale tomorrow. 201 00:10:54,153 --> 00:10:57,663 Yeah, that's what we're doing. We're hiding the good dresses. 202 00:10:57,908 --> 00:11:01,158 In fact, I just caught another Sneaky Sue. 203 00:11:01,370 --> 00:11:03,790 Oh, I'm Sophie. 204 00:11:04,998 --> 00:11:09,208 Oh, wow, wow, wow! 205 00:11:10,379 --> 00:11:14,259 Oh, look at the color. 206 00:11:14,508 --> 00:11:17,638 That's not color. That's radiation. 207 00:11:17,927 --> 00:11:20,347 That dress is a one of a kind. 208 00:11:20,471 --> 00:11:23,311 -Meaning there's only one? -No, we have two. 209 00:11:24,225 --> 00:11:26,975 And I have two bridesmaids. 210 00:11:27,187 --> 00:11:30,937 I love it when life works out perfect like this. 211 00:11:35,278 --> 00:11:39,318 Ladies, our half-off sale will begin in a minute. 212 00:11:39,825 --> 00:11:40,825 Look at this place. 213 00:11:41,201 --> 00:11:42,991 There are more desperate women crammed in here 214 00:11:43,077 --> 00:11:46,207 than the splash zone at a Kenny Chesney concert. 215 00:11:46,831 --> 00:11:50,041 I know. It's like Black Friday at Walmart. 216 00:11:50,168 --> 00:11:51,378 And like Black Friday, 217 00:11:51,461 --> 00:11:53,631 hopefully someone will trample me. 218 00:11:53,797 --> 00:11:56,797 'Cause thanks to these dresses, my life is over. 219 00:11:57,384 --> 00:12:00,394 Max, did you hear me? My life is over. 220 00:12:00,886 --> 00:12:02,466 You said that when the Chinese food place 221 00:12:02,556 --> 00:12:04,176 forgot the duck sauce. 222 00:12:04,265 --> 00:12:05,345 Well, I'm sorry, 223 00:12:05,475 --> 00:12:07,265 but I had a whole other scenario planned 224 00:12:07,351 --> 00:12:09,061 for my return to The Times. 225 00:12:09,270 --> 00:12:12,190 "Entrepreneur rises from the ashes." 226 00:12:12,399 --> 00:12:13,939 Now, I'm just gonna be in The Times, 227 00:12:14,024 --> 00:12:16,034 looking like a stupid ash. 228 00:12:16,903 --> 00:12:18,283 Shoot, girl, just push on through. 229 00:12:18,363 --> 00:12:20,573 I'm pushing, girl. I am pushing. 230 00:12:20,657 --> 00:12:23,157 -Excuse us. Excuse us. -Excuse us. Excuse us. 231 00:12:23,243 --> 00:12:25,203 -Excuse us. -Excuse us. 232 00:12:25,495 --> 00:12:26,955 Just go, girl. 233 00:12:27,038 --> 00:12:30,288 I don't want anybody else to get those two yellow dresses. 234 00:12:31,293 --> 00:12:33,383 Max, did you hear that? 235 00:12:33,461 --> 00:12:36,131 Someone has worse taste than Sophie. 236 00:12:36,213 --> 00:12:37,553 Let them through. 237 00:12:37,966 --> 00:12:39,676 Now we just have to hang back here 238 00:12:39,759 --> 00:12:41,179 and let them get to those dresses first. 239 00:12:41,260 --> 00:12:43,220 Yay. My life is good again. 240 00:12:43,554 --> 00:12:47,524 Max, Caroline, up here! 241 00:12:48,768 --> 00:12:50,598 What was that, like, a second? 242 00:12:50,729 --> 00:12:54,769 I saved you a space upfront. Come on! 243 00:12:55,357 --> 00:12:56,777 Well, it's over. 244 00:12:56,860 --> 00:12:58,150 As soon as they cut that ribbon, 245 00:12:58,235 --> 00:12:59,735 Sophie's gonna Marshawn Lynch 246 00:12:59,821 --> 00:13:02,241 everyone who gets in the way of us and those dresses. 247 00:13:02,323 --> 00:13:03,533 There's only one way out of this. 248 00:13:03,616 --> 00:13:04,866 And you called it earlier. 249 00:13:05,243 --> 00:13:07,583 You have to let them trample you. 250 00:13:08,288 --> 00:13:09,788 I'm serious. 251 00:13:09,873 --> 00:13:12,673 I'm not about to be trampled on purpose. 252 00:13:12,875 --> 00:13:14,085 See if you still feel that way 253 00:13:14,168 --> 00:13:15,878 after I say these next few words. 254 00:13:16,004 --> 00:13:17,964 "Pictured from left, Caroline Channing." 255 00:13:18,048 --> 00:13:21,878 Try to fend off any heels you see heading for my eyes. 256 00:13:23,260 --> 00:13:24,680 Attention, ladies. 257 00:13:24,803 --> 00:13:27,263 As you see, I have the big scissors, 258 00:13:27,349 --> 00:13:31,809 which can only mean it's time to trim some nose hairs. 259 00:13:31,894 --> 00:13:34,274 (LAUGHTER) 260 00:13:34,563 --> 00:13:37,403 That Carl is crazy. 261 00:13:38,360 --> 00:13:40,860 The annual bridal sale is now... 262 00:13:40,946 --> 00:13:42,696 -Max, hold my hand. -open. 263 00:13:42,780 --> 00:13:44,990 (SCREAMING) 264 00:13:48,702 --> 00:13:51,872 Ladies, ladies, one at a time. 265 00:13:51,956 --> 00:13:53,246 -(YELPS) -(THUD) 266 00:13:54,292 --> 00:13:56,842 Well, I may be limping down the aisle 267 00:13:56,919 --> 00:13:59,669 but at least I won't be limping in something Swiffer might sell 268 00:13:59,755 --> 00:14:01,965 to dust off ceiling fans. 269 00:14:02,049 --> 00:14:04,639 (GIRL SCREAMS) 270 00:14:04,719 --> 00:14:06,299 Oh, my God, girl! Here she comes! 271 00:14:06,388 --> 00:14:08,388 Here she comes! 272 00:14:10,642 --> 00:14:12,272 My girl, Rhonda, had that dress first. 273 00:14:12,351 --> 00:14:14,311 Oh, your girl is gonna have to pry it 274 00:14:14,395 --> 00:14:15,975 out of my cold, dead hands. 275 00:14:16,147 --> 00:14:19,727 Hey, Max, Caroline! Try it on! 276 00:14:23,279 --> 00:14:25,949 Follow me to the changing room. 277 00:14:35,834 --> 00:14:39,464 CAROLINE: I'm never coming out in this dress, I'm scared. 278 00:14:39,546 --> 00:14:42,966 On the count of one, two... 279 00:14:46,677 --> 00:14:48,597 Maybe it's not that bad. 280 00:14:53,643 --> 00:14:55,643 -It's bad. -It's bad. 281 00:14:56,980 --> 00:15:00,650 Okay. So you're telling me, Versace got murdered 282 00:15:00,774 --> 00:15:03,824 but no one's taken out whoever made these? 283 00:15:04,236 --> 00:15:05,566 I know. 284 00:15:05,654 --> 00:15:07,374 I feel like Tweety Bird is gonna sue us 285 00:15:07,448 --> 00:15:10,158 for copyright infringement. 286 00:15:11,119 --> 00:15:15,459 I feel like we should have giant toilet paper rolls under here. 287 00:15:16,206 --> 00:15:17,376 Well, maybe we'll like these better 288 00:15:17,458 --> 00:15:18,958 when we're out of this bright light. 289 00:15:19,168 --> 00:15:22,088 Max, we are the bright light. 290 00:15:22,547 --> 00:15:27,047 Ladies, you forgot the matching hats. 291 00:15:28,260 --> 00:15:30,470 There's more? 292 00:15:30,804 --> 00:15:34,064 Oh, if anyone finds a Xanax, it's mine. 293 00:15:35,100 --> 00:15:37,390 It was knocked out of my hand by two women duking it out 294 00:15:37,479 --> 00:15:40,269 over a chintz mermaid dress. 295 00:15:41,357 --> 00:15:43,607 Oh, now it looks good. 296 00:15:49,490 --> 00:15:53,370 There's Xanax on the loose and I'm just standing here? 297 00:15:53,452 --> 00:15:54,542 At least if I was high, 298 00:15:54,620 --> 00:15:57,250 I'd have an excuse to be wearing this. 299 00:15:57,624 --> 00:15:59,044 Here pilly, pilly. 300 00:15:59,125 --> 00:16:02,125 Here pilly, pilly, pilly. 301 00:16:02,379 --> 00:16:07,089 Girl, for real, you look like straight up crap in that dress. 302 00:16:08,384 --> 00:16:11,144 For real. You white girls can't pull that color off. 303 00:16:11,346 --> 00:16:13,966 That's a waste of popping lemon yellow. 304 00:16:14,182 --> 00:16:17,352 I know. I am way too white for this. 305 00:16:17,644 --> 00:16:20,114 She's also too white to say "turnt up" all the time 306 00:16:20,187 --> 00:16:21,687 but that hasn't stopped her. 307 00:16:23,149 --> 00:16:25,239 This dress was not my choice. 308 00:16:25,360 --> 00:16:27,570 I hate everything about it. This is a disaster. 309 00:16:27,653 --> 00:16:31,203 -This is "Dressageddon." -Yeah, but in a good way. 310 00:16:33,118 --> 00:16:35,618 You two don't wanna wear the dresses? 311 00:16:35,828 --> 00:16:37,328 You don't have to. 312 00:16:37,746 --> 00:16:39,326 But I thought you wanted us 313 00:16:39,415 --> 00:16:41,455 to match the balloons and the ducks. 314 00:16:43,753 --> 00:16:46,093 Max, she said we don't have to wear the dress. 315 00:16:46,172 --> 00:16:47,302 Don't question her. 316 00:16:47,381 --> 00:16:48,591 That's like questioning a prison guard 317 00:16:48,674 --> 00:16:50,434 when he says you're free to go. 318 00:16:52,886 --> 00:16:54,636 Sophie, are you sure you don't care? 319 00:16:55,014 --> 00:16:57,564 Oh, yeah. Sure. 320 00:16:57,850 --> 00:17:00,980 Yeah, they're all yours, Destiny's Child. 321 00:17:12,198 --> 00:17:14,988 This is 10 pounds of ugly junk. 322 00:17:15,201 --> 00:17:17,791 Reminds me of this bartender, Pete, I used to date. 323 00:17:18,538 --> 00:17:20,958 Come to think of it, that made me gag, too. 324 00:17:23,084 --> 00:17:24,504 Okay. Done. 325 00:17:24,669 --> 00:17:26,299 (WOMAN SOBS) 326 00:17:26,671 --> 00:17:30,091 Listen, crying in a women's dressing room? 327 00:17:30,967 --> 00:17:33,427 Whoever it is, girl, big butts are in. 328 00:17:34,679 --> 00:17:37,469 (SOBBING CONTINUES) 329 00:17:37,557 --> 00:17:39,557 That's Sophie's cry. 330 00:17:39,642 --> 00:17:41,102 I know, because I hear it through the vent 331 00:17:41,185 --> 00:17:43,935 when she watches Nashville. 332 00:17:45,230 --> 00:17:47,320 Sophie? 333 00:17:47,858 --> 00:17:49,398 SOPHIE: No. 334 00:17:50,612 --> 00:17:52,452 Are you okay? 335 00:17:53,405 --> 00:17:56,445 It's not me, but I'm okay. 336 00:18:00,038 --> 00:18:01,328 (CRYING) 337 00:18:01,413 --> 00:18:03,463 Sophie, why are you crying? 338 00:18:03,665 --> 00:18:07,205 When I heard what you said about the dresses... 339 00:18:07,545 --> 00:18:13,175 It's just-- It's almost, kind of like, 340 00:18:13,468 --> 00:18:16,048 you think I have bad taste or something. 341 00:18:17,221 --> 00:18:19,601 No. 342 00:18:22,101 --> 00:18:24,481 Caroline thinks you have great taste. 343 00:18:25,855 --> 00:18:29,185 Wha... She does? 344 00:18:29,275 --> 00:18:32,565 Well, then she should say so. 345 00:18:32,653 --> 00:18:34,243 Now. 346 00:18:38,409 --> 00:18:42,749 Well, Sophie, I think you have your own unique style. 347 00:18:43,413 --> 00:18:45,043 And I think 348 00:18:45,415 --> 00:18:50,755 that I didn't hear the words "great" or "taste." 349 00:18:51,047 --> 00:18:52,587 Sophie, what do you even care what I think? 350 00:18:52,673 --> 00:18:53,723 Just say it. 351 00:18:53,842 --> 00:19:00,142 Sophie, I think you have great taste. 352 00:19:00,431 --> 00:19:02,471 You do? 353 00:19:04,143 --> 00:19:07,273 (LAUGHING) 354 00:19:07,355 --> 00:19:09,725 Then, what are we doing sitting here? 355 00:19:10,732 --> 00:19:13,692 Let's go and get those dresses back. 356 00:19:13,819 --> 00:19:16,489 Come on. Help me. 357 00:19:20,492 --> 00:19:22,542 Those other girls already took them. 358 00:19:23,371 --> 00:19:25,081 What? 359 00:19:30,461 --> 00:19:32,381 Well, at least we don't have to wear those ugly, 360 00:19:32,462 --> 00:19:34,722 yellow bridesmaid's dresses at the wedding. 361 00:19:34,840 --> 00:19:36,470 Yup. Now, you only have to wear ugly, 362 00:19:36,550 --> 00:19:39,180 yellow dresses here every night. 363 00:19:39,304 --> 00:19:41,224 This is the best thing that's happened to me 364 00:19:41,306 --> 00:19:43,096 since I realized that weird mole on my arm 365 00:19:43,182 --> 00:19:45,272 was just a Grape-Nut and not cancer. 366 00:19:46,184 --> 00:19:47,734 Girls, great news. 367 00:19:47,895 --> 00:19:51,315 You stuffed Han in the microwave and you're ready to hit power? 368 00:19:51,398 --> 00:19:54,528 Come on. We've tried. You know he doesn't fit. 369 00:19:54,611 --> 00:19:56,951 The one thing he's too big for. 370 00:19:57,029 --> 00:20:00,659 No, I got Ilia Jorbich to be our wedding photographer. 371 00:20:00,909 --> 00:20:03,699 He's the best photographer at The Warsaw Times. 372 00:20:03,786 --> 00:20:06,996 Well, he's the only one who still has both arms. 373 00:20:07,373 --> 00:20:10,293 Wait, it's The Warsaw Times? 374 00:20:10,626 --> 00:20:12,086 All this time, I've been thinking it was 375 00:20:12,170 --> 00:20:13,800 The New York Times. 376 00:20:13,962 --> 00:20:15,212 New York Times? 377 00:20:15,381 --> 00:20:16,761 This is much more exclusive. 378 00:20:16,883 --> 00:20:18,513 You can only get it in two places. 379 00:20:18,593 --> 00:20:22,063 Poland and the deli in New Jersey that sells missiles. 380 00:20:22,763 --> 00:20:24,103 This is amazing. 381 00:20:24,265 --> 00:20:27,385 My comeback in The New York Times has been preserved. 382 00:20:27,518 --> 00:20:29,768 Max, I'm gonna go ahead and smile. 383 00:20:29,854 --> 00:20:31,694 My life is good again. 384 00:20:31,772 --> 00:20:33,572 Don't smile yet 'cause Sophie told me 385 00:20:33,650 --> 00:20:35,940 that because you said she has such great taste, 386 00:20:36,027 --> 00:20:38,447 she's designing our dresses herself. 387 00:20:38,947 --> 00:20:41,987 -What was that, like a second? -Yup. 388 00:20:42,075 --> 00:20:45,155 You just went from the best of times to The Warsaw Times. 389 00:20:48,789 --> 00:20:50,209 (CASH REGISTER RINGS) 390 00:20:51,625 --> 00:20:54,125 (THEME MUSIC PLAYS) 391 00:21:13,647 --> 00:21:15,977 (English US - SDH) 392 00:21:16,027 --> 00:21:20,577 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 29041

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