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1
00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074
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2
00:01:03,040 --> 00:01:05,168
(INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS)
3
00:01:09,480 --> 00:01:10,766
(SIGHS)
4
00:01:12,440 --> 00:01:14,249
There he is again.
5
00:01:16,840 --> 00:01:19,002
Almost two decades
and he still comes.
6
00:01:19,600 --> 00:01:20,806
So sad.
7
00:01:23,320 --> 00:01:24,970
How you doing, buddy?
8
00:01:25,600 --> 00:01:28,171
Brought you all
your favorite candies.
9
00:01:33,480 --> 00:01:36,086
Come on, Lloyd,
you gotta get over her!
10
00:01:36,280 --> 00:01:38,089
Mary Samsonite
was just a girl.
11
00:01:40,280 --> 00:01:41,850
Besides, she's married.
12
00:01:42,320 --> 00:01:43,685
And even if
it had worked out,
13
00:01:43,760 --> 00:01:46,161
would you really want
ginger babies? Ugh.
14
00:01:46,600 --> 00:01:47,681
Gross.
15
00:01:50,040 --> 00:01:51,690
Man, you gotta
give me something!
16
00:01:52,640 --> 00:01:53,880
(URINATING)
17
00:01:57,720 --> 00:01:58,881
(SIGHS)
18
00:02:04,640 --> 00:02:07,484
Lloyd, I got something
important to tell you.
19
00:02:08,840 --> 00:02:10,569
I can't come here anymore.
20
00:02:12,400 --> 00:02:16,246
I got kind of a serious
medical problem.
21
00:02:17,760 --> 00:02:19,046
(MUMBLING)
22
00:02:19,640 --> 00:02:21,563
It's sort of complicated.
23
00:02:22,520 --> 00:02:26,241
Basically, I'm gonna be pretty
busy for the next few months.
24
00:02:28,640 --> 00:02:29,721
Anyway...
25
00:02:30,240 --> 00:02:32,686
You're in good
hands here. So...
26
00:02:37,200 --> 00:02:38,770
Take care, buddy.
27
00:02:40,320 --> 00:02:41,321
(BABBLES)
28
00:02:43,520 --> 00:02:44,885
Lloyd, did you
say something?
29
00:02:45,680 --> 00:02:47,011
(MUFFLED) I got you.
30
00:02:51,160 --> 00:02:52,650
That's it, kid.
You can do it.
31
00:02:52,720 --> 00:02:54,449
Come on, come on, come on!
Spit it out!
32
00:02:55,720 --> 00:02:57,290
(YELLING) Got ya!
33
00:02:57,480 --> 00:02:58,606
(LAUGHS)
34
00:02:59,960 --> 00:03:01,724
(STAMMERING) What?
35
00:03:02,240 --> 00:03:04,686
You should see the
look on your face!
36
00:03:05,000 --> 00:03:07,810
I got you so good!
37
00:03:07,920 --> 00:03:10,082
(STAMMERING) Wait a second!
(CHUCKLES)
38
00:03:10,200 --> 00:03:13,761
Are you telling me that you
were faking for 20 years?
39
00:03:14,120 --> 00:03:15,121
Uh-huh.
40
00:03:15,200 --> 00:03:18,921
So you mean that you just wasted
the best years of your life?
41
00:03:19,400 --> 00:03:20,731
(BLOWS RASPBERRY)
Out the window!
42
00:03:20,800 --> 00:03:25,044
And you let me come here every
Wednesday for, like, a thousand weeks,
43
00:03:25,440 --> 00:03:27,283
and it was all
just for a gag?
44
00:03:28,000 --> 00:03:29,206
Uh-huh.
45
00:03:29,440 --> 00:03:30,601
That's
46
00:03:31,120 --> 00:03:32,485
awesome!
(CHUCKLES)
47
00:03:32,600 --> 00:03:33,761
I know!
48
00:03:33,840 --> 00:03:36,969
You gotta admit, I totally
had you suckered, didn't I?
49
00:03:37,200 --> 00:03:38,486
Hook, line and sphincter!
50
00:03:38,680 --> 00:03:39,727
(BOTH LAUGH)
51
00:03:39,800 --> 00:03:42,121
Oh, oh. (GROANS)
On! Oh, oh. Oh.
52
00:03:43,160 --> 00:03:45,811
Legs are a little rubbery after
all that time sitting here.
53
00:03:45,960 --> 00:03:47,086
Why don't you
roll me inside?
54
00:03:47,160 --> 00:03:49,481
We'll get the nurse to take
the catheter out of me.
Oh.
55
00:03:49,640 --> 00:03:52,086
I wanna see if my lizard's
still spitting straight.
56
00:03:52,160 --> 00:03:54,640
We don't need nurses for that.
I know how to do it.
57
00:03:54,800 --> 00:03:55,926
But don't you have to...
(GRUNTING)
58
00:03:56,000 --> 00:03:57,206
(GROANING)
59
00:03:57,520 --> 00:03:58,521
(YELLING)
60
00:03:59,000 --> 00:04:00,081
Oh, God!
61
00:04:00,320 --> 00:04:01,810
That thing's
really taken root!
62
00:04:02,280 --> 00:04:03,770
(COUGHS)
Hey, fellas!
63
00:04:03,840 --> 00:04:05,171
Give me a hand over here.
Si.
64
00:04:06,760 --> 00:04:07,761
(HUFFS)
65
00:04:07,840 --> 00:04:09,683
Yankos los pee-pee.
66
00:04:10,000 --> 00:04:11,331
Are you sure
about this, Har?
67
00:04:11,680 --> 00:04:13,603
Usually, doctors like
to do this sort of thing.
68
00:04:13,680 --> 00:04:15,523
Oh, that's just for
insurance purposes.
69
00:04:15,840 --> 00:04:17,763
On three. Three!
70
00:04:18,000 --> 00:04:19,923
(ALL GRUNTING)
(YELLING)
71
00:04:25,280 --> 00:04:26,441
(HARRY LAUGHING)
72
00:04:26,600 --> 00:04:28,841
You are a fricking
genius, Lloyd!
73
00:04:28,920 --> 00:04:30,760
I mean, nobody else
could have pulled that off!
74
00:04:30,800 --> 00:04:31,800
Eh!
Nobody!
75
00:04:31,840 --> 00:04:35,367
I mean,
the shock treatments,
the partial lobotomy!
76
00:04:35,680 --> 00:04:37,364
That's commitment!
Yeah.
77
00:04:38,400 --> 00:04:39,845
It broke up the monotony.
78
00:04:39,920 --> 00:04:41,081
One thing
I don't get, though.
79
00:04:41,320 --> 00:04:43,322
Why did you play it out
for 20 whole years?
80
00:04:43,720 --> 00:04:45,960
Because it wouldn't
have been funny if
I stopped too soon.
81
00:04:46,160 --> 00:04:47,685
Comedy is all
about timing, Har.
82
00:04:47,840 --> 00:04:51,322
Yeah, but wouldn't it still have been
funny if you quit after 10 years?
83
00:04:51,400 --> 00:04:53,528
Oh, definitely.
But not as!
84
00:04:53,600 --> 00:04:55,250
(BOTH LAUGH)
Whoa!
85
00:04:55,840 --> 00:04:57,046
Pretty bird.
86
00:04:57,160 --> 00:04:58,889
LLOYD: Crap on toast!
Pretty bird.
87
00:04:59,520 --> 00:05:01,443
Is that grown-up Billy in 4-C?
Uh-huh.
88
00:05:01,920 --> 00:05:03,809
Come on, Siskel,
give me a movie quote.
89
00:05:03,880 --> 00:05:05,689
What did they say
in Jerry Maguire?
90
00:05:05,840 --> 00:05:07,365
"You had me at hello."
91
00:05:07,440 --> 00:05:08,601
Um, Titanic?
92
00:05:08,720 --> 00:05:10,165
"I'm king of the world."
93
00:05:10,240 --> 00:05:11,730
(CHUCKLING) Good job!
94
00:05:12,360 --> 00:05:13,407
(SOFTLY) We better
tiptoe past him.
95
00:05:13,520 --> 00:05:15,363
Oh, no, you can't
tiptoe past a blindy.
96
00:05:15,440 --> 00:05:16,441
Their hearing's too good.
97
00:05:17,120 --> 00:05:18,246
What?
Mmm-hmm.
98
00:05:18,400 --> 00:05:20,084
That's just an
old wives' tale.
99
00:05:20,360 --> 00:05:22,362
Like women shouldn't
smoke during pregnancy.
100
00:05:22,560 --> 00:05:25,450
I turned out fine. My mom
smoked like a chimney.
101
00:05:25,760 --> 00:05:27,480
Especially when she was drinking!
(CHUCKLES)
102
00:05:27,560 --> 00:05:28,560
Whatever.
Doesn't matter.
103
00:05:28,640 --> 00:05:30,000
Billy's over
the whole Petey thing.
104
00:05:30,240 --> 00:05:31,241
You should see
his apartment.
105
00:05:31,360 --> 00:05:33,931
He's got the best rare
bird collection in Rhody!
106
00:05:34,080 --> 00:05:35,081
(SCOFFS)
107
00:05:35,280 --> 00:05:36,770
I gotta see this.
108
00:05:36,960 --> 00:05:38,450
Hey, Billy!
109
00:05:40,240 --> 00:05:42,811
I hear you got a lot
of flocking birds.
(BOTH LAUGHING)
110
00:05:46,120 --> 00:05:48,282
Is that you, Lloyd?
(CHUCKLES)
111
00:05:49,280 --> 00:05:50,611
Very good.
112
00:05:50,760 --> 00:05:53,411
I didn't think you'd recognize
me after all these years.
113
00:05:53,560 --> 00:05:55,130
So what have you
been up to, buddy boy?
114
00:05:55,280 --> 00:05:56,611
Seen any good
movies lately?
115
00:05:58,000 --> 00:06:00,002
I mean, you know,
like...
116
00:06:00,160 --> 00:06:01,400
On the radio?
117
00:06:03,000 --> 00:06:04,411
What was that?
(SQUAWKING)
118
00:06:04,600 --> 00:06:05,880
Did you just feed
them something?
119
00:06:05,920 --> 00:06:06,920
Relax.
120
00:06:06,960 --> 00:06:08,007
It's just a little candy.
121
00:06:08,280 --> 00:06:09,725
You can't feed
candy to birds!
122
00:06:09,800 --> 00:06:10,961
Their stomachs
will explode!
123
00:06:11,240 --> 00:06:12,810
Even if it's just
a few Pop Rocks?
124
00:06:12,920 --> 00:06:15,127
Are you crazy?
Pick those up!
125
00:06:15,240 --> 00:06:17,129
Pick them up!
All right, all right!
126
00:06:17,400 --> 00:06:18,845
Sheesh.
127
00:06:20,840 --> 00:06:22,365
Well, nice catching up.
128
00:06:22,840 --> 00:06:24,001
See you later.
129
00:06:24,480 --> 00:06:25,720
Not if I see you first!
130
00:06:25,800 --> 00:06:27,325
LLOYD: Ha-ha! Good one!
131
00:06:27,440 --> 00:06:29,488
No, no, no,
it's okay, Siskel.
132
00:06:30,680 --> 00:06:33,604
Daddy's not gonna let him
get anywhere near you.
133
00:06:33,720 --> 00:06:35,688
BOTH: Booga!
(SCREAMING)
134
00:06:36,120 --> 00:06:38,088
See? I told you
that hearing thing
135
00:06:38,160 --> 00:06:39,280
was a wives' tale.
(CHUCKLES)
136
00:06:41,040 --> 00:06:43,008
Oh, yeah!
137
00:06:43,520 --> 00:06:45,443
Hey, who's this?
Ah.
138
00:06:46,440 --> 00:06:47,440
That's Butthole.
139
00:06:47,480 --> 00:06:48,925
I found him out in the
alley a couple years ago.
140
00:06:49,000 --> 00:06:50,684
Why did you name him Butthole?
Oh.
141
00:06:52,360 --> 00:06:53,691
Because of this.
142
00:06:53,840 --> 00:06:55,205
Oh, yeah. Good name.
143
00:06:55,680 --> 00:06:56,681
Totally fits.
144
00:06:57,680 --> 00:06:59,489
I like what you've
done with the place.
145
00:07:00,120 --> 00:07:01,804
(HUMMING)
Nice cappuccino machine.
146
00:07:01,960 --> 00:07:03,041
Who's the astronaut?
147
00:07:03,160 --> 00:07:04,366
Oh, that's my roommate.
148
00:07:04,800 --> 00:07:06,040
Roommate?
149
00:07:06,480 --> 00:07:07,720
You got a new roommate?
150
00:07:07,840 --> 00:07:10,127
I had to get somebody to
pay your half of the rent
151
00:07:10,240 --> 00:07:11,480
while you were
in the hospital.
152
00:07:12,360 --> 00:07:13,691
How's it going,
Ice Pick?
153
00:07:13,880 --> 00:07:16,565
Best day ever. Greatest
day of my life, really.
154
00:07:18,360 --> 00:07:19,850
Pick cooks up
a rock candy
155
00:07:19,960 --> 00:07:21,121
that will
make you dizzy.
156
00:07:21,200 --> 00:07:23,089
Folks come from all over
the city to buy it.
157
00:07:23,560 --> 00:07:25,005
It's burning my eyes.
158
00:07:25,480 --> 00:07:26,845
Must be Cajun style.
159
00:07:28,520 --> 00:07:31,330
So what's this serious
medical problem you've
been blabbing about?
160
00:07:31,840 --> 00:07:33,080
And it better be good.
161
00:07:33,920 --> 00:07:36,571
Lloyd,
there's something...
162
00:07:37,720 --> 00:07:38,687
I've known about
this for a while,
163
00:07:38,760 --> 00:07:39,880
but I didn't
wanna worry you.
164
00:07:40,560 --> 00:07:42,324
Mmm-hmm?
(SIGHS)
165
00:07:42,880 --> 00:07:44,689
I need a kidney transplant.
166
00:07:46,000 --> 00:07:48,207
No way! Really?
167
00:07:48,680 --> 00:07:49,727
Wow.
168
00:07:50,040 --> 00:07:51,166
So what do you wanna
do for dinner tonight?
169
00:07:51,440 --> 00:07:52,726
Wanna hit Haven Brothers?
170
00:07:53,040 --> 00:07:55,321
I could eat the mud-hole out
of a dead skunk! (SNICKERING)
171
00:07:55,920 --> 00:07:57,365
Are you not listening
to me, Lloyd?
172
00:07:57,600 --> 00:07:59,568
Getting a new kidney
is a really big deal.
173
00:07:59,920 --> 00:08:03,242
There's waiting lists,
lots and lots of
forms to fill out,
174
00:08:03,440 --> 00:08:06,569
and if I can't find another
kidney real soon, I'm dead meat.
175
00:08:08,560 --> 00:08:09,607
Yeah, well,
176
00:08:10,280 --> 00:08:12,806
maybe, just maybe,
177
00:08:12,960 --> 00:08:16,362
there's a person out there
who cares about you so much
178
00:08:16,520 --> 00:08:17,965
that said person
would be willing
179
00:08:18,040 --> 00:08:20,805
to give up a little piece of
himself to save your life.
180
00:08:21,360 --> 00:08:23,442
Really, Lloyd?
You'd do that?
181
00:08:23,760 --> 00:08:27,446
Me? (LAUGHING)
Yeah, right! Nice try!
182
00:08:27,600 --> 00:08:29,250
The nerve!
Oh.
183
00:08:31,200 --> 00:08:34,249
I mean, I would,
in a New York heartbeat.
184
00:08:34,720 --> 00:08:36,085
I'm just not a urine match.
(MEOWS)
185
00:08:36,280 --> 00:08:38,248
My wizz doesn't get
all sudsy like yours.
186
00:08:39,160 --> 00:08:40,446
(INHALES) Ow.
187
00:08:41,600 --> 00:08:43,568
Wait. Don't panic.
(YOWLING)
188
00:08:44,560 --> 00:08:46,642
I know exactly
what we gotta do.
(CRASHES)
189
00:08:49,560 --> 00:08:50,527
I don't know
about this, Lloyd.
190
00:08:50,600 --> 00:08:52,170
I haven't been home
in over 20 years.
191
00:08:52,320 --> 00:08:53,731
Come on, Harry!
192
00:08:53,800 --> 00:08:55,609
You need a genital
organ match.
193
00:08:55,720 --> 00:08:56,926
They're your parents.
194
00:08:57,160 --> 00:08:58,650
I'm not gonna go crawling
back to them, Lloyd.
195
00:08:58,720 --> 00:09:00,085
Not after what
they did to me.
196
00:09:00,160 --> 00:09:01,241
What did they do?
197
00:09:01,400 --> 00:09:02,845
They threw me
out of the house.
198
00:09:03,000 --> 00:09:05,241
Why? Just because I
told them I was gay.
199
00:09:05,840 --> 00:09:07,126
Why did you
tell them that?
200
00:09:07,520 --> 00:09:08,601
I was sick of
mowing the lawn.
201
00:09:08,680 --> 00:09:09,761
Oh, yeah.
202
00:09:09,840 --> 00:09:12,047
Well, I don't see
what choice you have.
203
00:09:12,440 --> 00:09:13,680
You either go home
and face the music
204
00:09:13,760 --> 00:09:15,808
or you suffocate
in your own pee.
205
00:09:16,200 --> 00:09:17,645
Yeah, I guess
you're right.
206
00:09:17,720 --> 00:09:18,767
Okay, let's do this.
207
00:09:18,840 --> 00:09:20,330
All right. Hop on.
208
00:09:22,480 --> 00:09:24,084
Engage super thrusters!
209
00:09:24,160 --> 00:09:25,400
Don't, Lloyd!
210
00:09:25,480 --> 00:09:27,528
(COUNTRY MUSIC PLAYING)
(GRUNTING)
211
00:09:27,600 --> 00:09:29,045
Pardon me, Harry.
212
00:09:32,840 --> 00:09:34,171
(INAUDIBLE)
213
00:09:38,680 --> 00:09:40,045
(BRAKES SCREECHING)
214
00:09:41,480 --> 00:09:42,845
Here we are.
215
00:09:44,160 --> 00:09:45,810
Place looks smaller
than I remember.
216
00:09:46,000 --> 00:09:47,047
Oh, yeah.
217
00:09:47,160 --> 00:09:48,161
Wow.
218
00:09:48,320 --> 00:09:50,527
Lot of memories
on this street.
219
00:09:50,640 --> 00:09:51,846
Yeah.
220
00:09:52,520 --> 00:09:53,646
Remember when we
pulled up on the bike
221
00:09:53,720 --> 00:09:55,245
and parked it
a couple seconds ago?
222
00:09:55,360 --> 00:09:56,407
Yeah, that was cool.
223
00:09:56,480 --> 00:09:58,403
Oh, those were the days.
224
00:09:58,800 --> 00:10:00,040
I remember
one afternoon,
225
00:10:00,160 --> 00:10:01,525
it was the first
day of spring,
226
00:10:01,680 --> 00:10:03,762
the flowers were blooming,
the sun was shining
227
00:10:03,840 --> 00:10:05,444
and you and I
were doing cartwheels
228
00:10:05,520 --> 00:10:06,806
right down that
hill over there.
229
00:10:06,880 --> 00:10:08,245
Yeah, I remember that!
230
00:10:08,360 --> 00:10:10,328
We were in your dad's
Lincoln, right? Yeah.
231
00:10:10,440 --> 00:10:12,044
(BOTH LAUGHING)
232
00:10:13,200 --> 00:10:15,521
You totally lost it
when I yanked the wheel.
(BOTH LAUGHING)
233
00:10:18,600 --> 00:10:19,601
(BOTH GRUNT)
234
00:10:24,840 --> 00:10:26,569
Come on! Pick it up!
235
00:10:26,640 --> 00:10:29,041
Show a little
hustle in there!
236
00:10:31,080 --> 00:10:32,366
(BOTH GASP)
237
00:10:33,760 --> 00:10:36,286
Wow. Rong time, Harry!
238
00:10:36,880 --> 00:10:38,530
Oh, sorry.
We'll come back later.
239
00:10:38,760 --> 00:10:40,728
Hey!
No, no, no! I mean,
240
00:10:40,880 --> 00:10:42,848
rong time, no see.
241
00:10:43,440 --> 00:10:44,726
BOTH: Oh.
(BOTH CHUCKLE)
242
00:10:45,040 --> 00:10:46,724
HARRY'S DAD:
Where you been?
243
00:10:46,880 --> 00:10:48,120
Come! Come in!
244
00:10:48,280 --> 00:10:50,089
(CHUCKLING) Oh!
Thanks, Dad.
245
00:10:53,400 --> 00:10:54,447
So you see,
246
00:10:54,560 --> 00:10:58,042
my best hope for a donor match
is with a blood relative.
247
00:10:58,120 --> 00:10:59,246
Family.
248
00:11:00,480 --> 00:11:01,561
(CHUCKLES)
249
00:11:01,760 --> 00:11:03,922
Harry, you not touch
your peanut butter.
250
00:11:04,240 --> 00:11:06,561
Oh, that's okay.
I'm not very
hungry, Dad.
251
00:11:06,640 --> 00:11:08,244
(CHUCKLES)
When Harry young,
252
00:11:08,360 --> 00:11:11,045
oh, boy, he loves
the peanut butter.
253
00:11:11,240 --> 00:11:12,241
Oh. (CHUCKLES)
254
00:11:12,720 --> 00:11:14,290
Three jar a week disappear!
255
00:11:14,440 --> 00:11:15,487
Good to know.
256
00:11:15,600 --> 00:11:18,809
So anyway, which one of you
two's gonna cough up a kidney?
257
00:11:19,120 --> 00:11:20,884
(SPEAKING CANTONESE)
258
00:11:23,040 --> 00:11:25,281
What? What was that?
(LAUGHING)
259
00:11:26,160 --> 00:11:27,207
Wait!
260
00:11:27,280 --> 00:11:29,169
I know! You're the gopher
from Caddyshack.
261
00:11:29,600 --> 00:11:31,602
Look at her!
She's got it down!
262
00:11:31,960 --> 00:11:33,405
We love you, Harry.
263
00:11:34,240 --> 00:11:36,163
Do you love
him long time?
(CHUCKLES)
264
00:11:37,960 --> 00:11:40,850
But you know you're
not our real son, right?
265
00:11:41,000 --> 00:11:42,411
You adopted.
266
00:11:43,840 --> 00:11:44,966
Ouch. (WHISTLES)
267
00:11:45,680 --> 00:11:46,681
(GROANS)
268
00:11:46,800 --> 00:11:48,609
(MAKES CREAKING NOISES)
269
00:11:51,480 --> 00:11:52,970
Dad, what are you saying?
(SIGHS)
270
00:11:53,800 --> 00:11:55,290
Sorry, Harry.
271
00:11:55,400 --> 00:11:56,970
We thought you know.
272
00:11:58,480 --> 00:11:59,527
Wow.
273
00:11:59,640 --> 00:12:01,085
What a nut punch.
274
00:12:01,320 --> 00:12:02,651
Don't be glum, Har.
275
00:12:02,800 --> 00:12:05,451
All this means is that your real
parents are out there somewhere.
276
00:12:05,600 --> 00:12:07,125
And I will go to
the ends of the earth to...
277
00:12:07,200 --> 00:12:08,326
Real parents dead.
278
00:12:08,480 --> 00:12:09,641
You're boned.
279
00:12:12,320 --> 00:12:14,049
James boned.
280
00:12:14,800 --> 00:12:16,450
HARRY'S MOM: Harry, Harry.
281
00:12:16,960 --> 00:12:18,724
(SPEAKING CANTONESE)
282
00:12:18,960 --> 00:12:20,246
(LAUGHS)
283
00:12:25,480 --> 00:12:26,641
(SNICKERING)
284
00:12:26,720 --> 00:12:29,564
No idea what you're saying,
Ma, but right back at you.
285
00:12:29,720 --> 00:12:33,441
Harry, before you go, your
mail piling up for many year.
286
00:12:33,520 --> 00:12:35,522
Oh.
We saving for you.
287
00:12:38,240 --> 00:12:41,642
Huh. Junk mail,
junk mail.
288
00:12:42,080 --> 00:12:43,241
(MUMBLES)
289
00:12:43,320 --> 00:12:45,368
I got accepted
to Arizona State.
290
00:12:45,480 --> 00:12:46,480
Hmm?
(CHUCKLES)
291
00:12:46,520 --> 00:12:47,885
Oh, look at this.
292
00:12:48,680 --> 00:12:50,364
It's a postcard
from Fraida Felcher.
293
00:12:50,680 --> 00:12:52,045
The chick from Cranston?
294
00:12:52,240 --> 00:12:53,890
(CHUCKLING) Ooh!
295
00:12:55,200 --> 00:12:56,690
So, what'd she
have to say?
296
00:12:57,480 --> 00:12:59,562
"Harry, I'm pregnant.
Please call me."
297
00:13:00,200 --> 00:13:02,168
(GASPS) Lloyd,
I'm gonna be a dad!
298
00:13:02,920 --> 00:13:04,001
No way!
299
00:13:04,240 --> 00:13:05,401
(BOTH CHUCKLING)
300
00:13:07,160 --> 00:13:08,366
Look at the postmark.
301
00:13:08,440 --> 00:13:09,726
1991.
302
00:13:09,920 --> 00:13:11,570
Do you know what
this means, Harry?
303
00:13:11,760 --> 00:13:13,762
You have a grown kid.
Oh.
304
00:13:14,080 --> 00:13:15,730
With grown kidneys.
305
00:13:20,920 --> 00:13:23,446
But, Lloyd, we don't have
a phone number or address,
306
00:13:23,560 --> 00:13:25,722
or nothing.
And who we fooling?
307
00:13:25,920 --> 00:13:28,366
Even if I find him,
my kid's never met me.
308
00:13:28,520 --> 00:13:30,443
Why would he wanna
give me a kidney?
309
00:13:30,880 --> 00:13:32,609
Are you serious?
310
00:13:32,880 --> 00:13:34,530
After all you've
done for him?
311
00:13:34,760 --> 00:13:36,364
It's the least he can do.
312
00:13:36,720 --> 00:13:38,131
What have I ever
done for him?
313
00:13:39,600 --> 00:13:41,967
You gave him his space.
Kids love that.
314
00:13:43,400 --> 00:13:45,767
I didn't wanna be
a helicopter parent.
315
00:13:46,200 --> 00:13:47,565
And you filled him
with wonder.
316
00:13:47,960 --> 00:13:49,405
Wonder?
Yeah.
317
00:13:50,200 --> 00:13:52,089
Like, "I wonder who
my deadbeat dad is?"
318
00:13:54,360 --> 00:13:55,771
Oh, it's okay, Lloyd.
319
00:13:56,920 --> 00:13:58,604
I've had a full life.
320
00:13:59,640 --> 00:14:01,483
I was a paperboy
for a week.
321
00:14:01,600 --> 00:14:03,329
I fathered a child.
322
00:14:03,760 --> 00:14:05,922
I've seen every episode
of Full House.
323
00:14:06,280 --> 00:14:07,406
(MOUTHFUL) Wow!
324
00:14:07,480 --> 00:14:08,811
Every episode?
325
00:14:09,600 --> 00:14:10,886
Okay, Okay-
326
00:14:11,040 --> 00:14:12,246
So how are
we gonna do this?
327
00:14:13,640 --> 00:14:15,210
If we find Fraida,
we find your kid.
328
00:14:15,280 --> 00:14:16,880
If we find your kid,
we find your kidney.
329
00:14:17,080 --> 00:14:18,286
Simple.
330
00:14:18,600 --> 00:14:20,568
Yeah, but I never even
knew where Fraida lived.
331
00:14:20,720 --> 00:14:23,610
I didn't have a car.
She always had to
pick me up in her van.
332
00:14:25,080 --> 00:14:26,969
Didn't you meet her
through Pete Stainer?
333
00:14:27,280 --> 00:14:28,964
Who?
Pee-Stain!
334
00:14:29,320 --> 00:14:30,651
He'll know how
to reach her.
335
00:14:30,760 --> 00:14:33,809
Yeah, but I haven't talked to
Pee-Stain in a hundred years!
336
00:14:33,920 --> 00:14:35,960
I can't drop by his house
in the middle of the night
337
00:14:36,000 --> 00:14:37,923
and ask him for
some chick's number.
338
00:14:39,480 --> 00:14:40,527
Sure you can!
339
00:14:41,120 --> 00:14:44,169
Oh, okay. But we gotta
be sub-tull about it.
340
00:14:44,360 --> 00:14:45,771
(CHUCKLES)
341
00:14:45,920 --> 00:14:47,968
The word is pronounced
"subtle," Harry.
342
00:14:48,040 --> 00:14:49,087
It's a silent "B."
343
00:14:50,600 --> 00:14:51,601
(GRUNTS)
344
00:14:51,680 --> 00:14:52,727
(BREATHES DEEPLY)
345
00:14:52,800 --> 00:14:53,847
What was that for?
346
00:14:54,160 --> 00:14:55,810
You had a gah-nat on you.
347
00:14:57,160 --> 00:14:59,811
Maybe we should catch a bus
to Pee-Stain's house.
348
00:15:00,160 --> 00:15:01,400
We can't. We got the bike.
349
00:15:01,480 --> 00:15:04,211
Oh, that's okay.
They got bike racks on
the front of buses now.
350
00:15:04,680 --> 00:15:05,841
LLOYD: Cool.
351
00:15:07,000 --> 00:15:08,331
(GRUNTING)
352
00:15:11,160 --> 00:15:12,207
Perfect.
353
00:15:13,240 --> 00:15:14,765
That's very convenient.
354
00:15:17,000 --> 00:15:18,240
BUS DRIVER: Hey, guys!
355
00:15:18,560 --> 00:15:20,005
You forgot your bike!
356
00:15:20,200 --> 00:15:23,329
Oh, it's not ours. Somebody
abandoned it in front of our place.
357
00:15:23,560 --> 00:15:27,167
Yeah. Just left it there
double-chained to a tree.
358
00:15:31,080 --> 00:15:32,081
Hey, Har.
359
00:15:32,200 --> 00:15:34,123
You wanna hear the second most
annoying sound in the world?
360
00:15:34,200 --> 00:15:35,281
Sure.
361
00:15:35,360 --> 00:15:36,521
(BELL DINGING)
362
00:15:42,960 --> 00:15:44,485
Yeah, that's
pretty annoying.
363
00:15:44,560 --> 00:15:45,766
No, not that.
364
00:15:45,880 --> 00:15:47,006
(SCREAMING) What the
hell are you doing
365
00:15:47,080 --> 00:15:49,208
ringing our doorbell like that
in the middle of the night?
366
00:15:49,360 --> 00:15:50,407
That! (LAUGHS)
367
00:15:52,200 --> 00:15:54,931
Mr. Stainer. Mrs. Stainer.
Nice to see you.
368
00:15:55,440 --> 00:15:56,885
Harry, Lloyd.
369
00:15:57,080 --> 00:15:59,765
To what do we owe the honor
at this late hour, gentlemen?
370
00:16:00,480 --> 00:16:01,891
We were just wondering
if Pee-Stain
371
00:16:01,960 --> 00:16:03,371
wanted to come out
for some suds.
372
00:16:03,880 --> 00:16:05,291
And maybe have
his ass handed to him
373
00:16:05,400 --> 00:16:06,640
in a couple of games
of Dig Dug.
374
00:16:06,840 --> 00:16:07,841
(BOTH CHUCKLE)
375
00:16:08,200 --> 00:16:09,565
Lloyd.
376
00:16:10,600 --> 00:16:11,886
Peter is dead.
377
00:16:13,480 --> 00:16:15,881
Yeah, right. Since when?
(BOTH LAUGH)
378
00:16:16,560 --> 00:16:19,404
Since 1991. Remember?
379
00:16:20,280 --> 00:16:21,327
The motorcycle accident?
380
00:16:22,640 --> 00:16:24,722
But I thought
he pulled through.
381
00:16:24,800 --> 00:16:27,849
The obituary said he was
survived by his parents.
382
00:16:28,640 --> 00:16:31,450
Uh, no. He did
not pull through.
383
00:16:32,480 --> 00:16:33,606
Are you sure?
384
00:16:34,600 --> 00:16:35,761
Yes.
385
00:16:38,160 --> 00:16:40,447
LLOYD: Oh, yeah.
386
00:16:41,240 --> 00:16:42,924
You guys are right.
(CHUCKLES)
387
00:16:43,320 --> 00:16:46,005
Anyway. Sorry about
that whole thing.
388
00:16:46,280 --> 00:16:48,282
Pee-Stain and I were
very close friends.
389
00:16:48,480 --> 00:16:49,560
MR. STAINER: Yeah, we know.
390
00:16:50,000 --> 00:16:52,162
You're the one who
sold him the motorcycle.
391
00:16:52,440 --> 00:16:53,441
LLOYD: And if I recall,
392
00:16:53,640 --> 00:16:55,005
I made him a sweet deal.
393
00:16:55,080 --> 00:16:57,287
My bike for his
helmet, straight up.
394
00:16:57,600 --> 00:16:59,329
(CHUCKLING)
That thing was a rocket.
395
00:16:59,680 --> 00:17:01,040
A little squirrelly
on the corners,
396
00:17:01,120 --> 00:17:02,451
but when you got it
on a straightaway...
397
00:17:02,480 --> 00:17:04,960
(IMITATING ENGINE REVVING)
Good night, Lloyd.
Good night, Harry.
398
00:17:09,960 --> 00:17:10,961
That was awkward.
399
00:17:11,040 --> 00:17:12,326
You're not kidding.
400
00:17:12,960 --> 00:17:15,042
When somebody comes
to your door at 3:00 a.m..
401
00:17:15,200 --> 00:17:16,804
put some pants on!
(CHUCKLES)
402
00:17:17,280 --> 00:17:18,486
Hey, wait a second.
403
00:17:18,680 --> 00:17:20,284
That's where
I met Fraida Felcher.
404
00:17:20,440 --> 00:17:24,331
She worked at
the funeral parlor where
they buried Pee-Stain.
405
00:17:25,280 --> 00:17:26,327
Wow.
406
00:17:27,200 --> 00:17:28,850
Think about it.
407
00:17:29,280 --> 00:17:32,204
If I hadn't sold that
crotch rocket to Pee-Stain,
408
00:17:32,400 --> 00:17:33,765
you wouldn't have
a bastard child
409
00:17:33,840 --> 00:17:35,649
who's gonna save your life.
410
00:17:37,160 --> 00:17:39,640
God's got a pretty warped
sense of humor, huh?
411
00:17:39,800 --> 00:17:42,326
Yeah. I bet
he smokes weed.
412
00:17:42,800 --> 00:17:45,451
Otherwise, why would he put our
testicles outside our bodies
413
00:17:45,520 --> 00:17:46,681
where someone
could do this?
414
00:17:46,760 --> 00:17:47,966
(GRUNTS)
(LAUGHS)
415
00:17:48,560 --> 00:17:49,561
(GRUNTS)
416
00:18:03,040 --> 00:18:04,690
(GROANS) Ow!
(LAUGHS)
417
00:18:05,040 --> 00:18:06,166
Bush club!
418
00:18:06,320 --> 00:18:07,606
(LAUGHS)
419
00:18:07,760 --> 00:18:09,444
What are
you doing, Lloyd?
420
00:18:10,440 --> 00:18:12,090
I'm about to meet my kid!
421
00:18:12,240 --> 00:18:13,321
Sorry, Har.
422
00:18:13,400 --> 00:18:15,562
Bushes like that don't
come along every day.
423
00:18:15,640 --> 00:18:16,641
(GROANS)
424
00:18:21,360 --> 00:18:24,204
Excuse me, sir.
ls Fraida working today?
425
00:18:27,040 --> 00:18:28,201
I'm Fraida.
LLOYD: Oh.
426
00:18:28,520 --> 00:18:29,681
Sorry for the confusion.
427
00:18:29,760 --> 00:18:31,967
We meant your smoking-hot
daughter, Fraida Junior.
428
00:18:32,960 --> 00:18:35,042
There is no
Fraida Junior.
429
00:18:35,760 --> 00:18:37,489
I'm the only Fraida
in the family.
430
00:18:37,560 --> 00:18:40,723
(SCOFFS) That little hottie
must have given us a fake name.
431
00:18:41,200 --> 00:18:42,725
Look, guys, it's me,
432
00:18:42,920 --> 00:18:43,967
Fraida Felcher.
433
00:18:44,080 --> 00:18:45,081
(LAUGHING)
Yeah, right.
434
00:18:45,200 --> 00:18:48,807
Like we'd be fighting over those
blowfish jowls. (BOTH SNICKERING)
435
00:18:49,040 --> 00:18:50,121
No offense.
436
00:18:50,560 --> 00:18:51,607
Harry.
437
00:18:52,200 --> 00:18:53,247
Lloyd.
438
00:18:54,040 --> 00:18:55,405
I'm gonna say
this one more time.
439
00:18:56,560 --> 00:18:58,050
I'm Fraida.
440
00:19:00,760 --> 00:19:01,807
(WHISPERING) Tattoo.
441
00:19:01,880 --> 00:19:02,881
Oh, Yeah?
442
00:19:02,960 --> 00:19:04,405
Then show us your tattoo.
Mmm-hmm.
443
00:19:04,720 --> 00:19:07,326
Because Fraida had a cute
little smiley face on her back
444
00:19:07,480 --> 00:19:09,289
right above
her bikini line.
445
00:19:09,440 --> 00:19:11,010
(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING)
446
00:19:17,240 --> 00:19:18,287
Well?
447
00:19:26,640 --> 00:19:27,641
Hmm.
448
00:19:28,160 --> 00:19:29,400
It's close.
Mmm.
449
00:19:31,600 --> 00:19:32,886
Oh. Hi, Fraida.
450
00:19:32,960 --> 00:19:34,485
Oh, hey!
How you been?
451
00:19:34,760 --> 00:19:35,841
Have you been
doing yoga?
452
00:19:36,640 --> 00:19:39,769
Yeah, I'm kind of busy. ls there
a reason you guys are here?
453
00:19:40,600 --> 00:19:41,761
Yes.
454
00:19:42,080 --> 00:19:45,687
I just received this postcard
that you sent me 22 years ago.
455
00:19:47,640 --> 00:19:49,688
Talk about snail mail.
(CHUCKLES)
456
00:19:52,640 --> 00:19:53,721
You better come in.
457
00:20:00,240 --> 00:20:02,766
So, did you, uh,
ever have the baby?
458
00:20:03,080 --> 00:20:05,481
I had a daughter. Named her Fanny.
(EXHALES)
459
00:20:05,600 --> 00:20:07,364
You hear that, Har?
A little girl.
460
00:20:07,560 --> 00:20:09,005
Fanny Felcher!
Ow!
461
00:20:09,600 --> 00:20:11,409
Are you all right?
Uh, bad back.
462
00:20:11,600 --> 00:20:14,080
Oh, I have so many
questions for you.
463
00:20:14,160 --> 00:20:15,207
FRAIDA: Like?
464
00:20:15,280 --> 00:20:17,328
HARRY: For starters,
how was the pregnancy?
465
00:20:17,400 --> 00:20:20,324
Was it a tough one? Did
they have to saw you open?
466
00:20:20,480 --> 00:20:22,562
Whoa, Har.
Dial it down!
467
00:20:22,920 --> 00:20:24,920
We're talking about the
miracle of childbirth here.
468
00:20:24,960 --> 00:20:27,327
What my insensitive
friend meant was,
469
00:20:27,400 --> 00:20:28,765
did you have a C-section
470
00:20:28,840 --> 00:20:32,287
or were you able to have
the baby au snatch-urel?
471
00:20:34,120 --> 00:20:36,441
It went smoothly.
(SCOFFS)
472
00:20:42,280 --> 00:20:43,770
So, uh, where is she?
473
00:20:45,400 --> 00:20:46,561
Can I meet her?
474
00:20:47,000 --> 00:20:48,001
(SIGHS)
475
00:20:48,080 --> 00:20:49,730
I gave her up for adoption.
476
00:20:51,280 --> 00:20:52,406
What?
477
00:20:54,080 --> 00:20:56,447
Why? Because I was
broke and scared.
478
00:20:56,640 --> 00:20:58,847
I regretted it
as soon as I did it.
479
00:20:59,360 --> 00:21:00,964
But it was too late.
480
00:21:01,200 --> 00:21:03,328
I'd already signed
away all my rights.
481
00:21:03,680 --> 00:21:04,727
(BREATHES DEEPLY)
482
00:21:04,800 --> 00:21:05,926
Then a couple years ago
483
00:21:06,000 --> 00:21:07,604
I wrote her a letter.
484
00:21:08,760 --> 00:21:10,330
But she never
wrote me back.
485
00:21:11,160 --> 00:21:12,207
Wait here.
486
00:21:13,680 --> 00:21:15,489
What do we do now?
487
00:21:15,960 --> 00:21:17,928
What do you mean,
"What do we do now?"
488
00:21:18,400 --> 00:21:20,607
I mean, at this exact moment
in time, what do we do?
489
00:21:20,800 --> 00:21:22,290
Harry, don't you hear that?
490
00:21:22,360 --> 00:21:24,089
It's the fat lady singing.
491
00:21:24,240 --> 00:21:25,480
It's over!
492
00:21:26,080 --> 00:21:27,889
I need something to drink.
493
00:21:28,240 --> 00:21:29,730
But...
Harry, enough!
494
00:21:30,160 --> 00:21:31,571
We tried and we failed!
495
00:21:31,720 --> 00:21:33,290
As Vince Lombardi
used to say,
496
00:21:33,360 --> 00:21:34,521
you gotta know
when to quit!
497
00:21:35,600 --> 00:21:38,080
Hey, you should pick out one of
those coffins while we're here.
498
00:21:38,160 --> 00:21:39,571
What if...
Darn it, Har!
499
00:21:39,800 --> 00:21:42,929
I cannot live on this emotional
roller coaster any longer.
500
00:21:43,080 --> 00:21:44,889
I feel bad saying it,
but you're slunk meat.
501
00:21:45,240 --> 00:21:47,080
Here's a picture I found
of my daughter online.
502
00:21:48,560 --> 00:21:49,561
(GASPS)
503
00:21:58,920 --> 00:22:00,922
Or, we could suck it up,
504
00:22:01,080 --> 00:22:02,206
pick ourselves up
by our bootstraps
505
00:22:02,320 --> 00:22:04,846
and go find that little girl!
(CHUCKLING)
506
00:22:05,040 --> 00:22:06,041
(MUMBLES)
507
00:22:06,120 --> 00:22:07,201
Hold on.
508
00:22:07,280 --> 00:22:09,248
You wrote her a letter. You
must know where she lives!
509
00:22:09,320 --> 00:22:13,211
Yeah. I tracked her down through
this adoption search site.
510
00:22:13,560 --> 00:22:15,767
She was raised by
this hotshot scientist.
511
00:22:15,960 --> 00:22:17,849
Why didn't you just go
find her in person?
512
00:22:18,600 --> 00:22:19,886
If she doesn't
want to meet me,
513
00:22:19,960 --> 00:22:21,883
I am not going to
force myself on her.
514
00:22:22,440 --> 00:22:23,965
Maybe she didn't
get your letter.
515
00:22:24,400 --> 00:22:25,811
She got it, all right.
516
00:22:27,880 --> 00:22:29,600
LLOYD: What if we go
track her down for you?
517
00:22:29,680 --> 00:22:31,250
There's no lawsuit
against that.
518
00:22:31,600 --> 00:22:32,806
Are you guys serious?
519
00:22:33,000 --> 00:22:34,161
You'd help me out?
520
00:22:34,640 --> 00:22:36,529
Of course we'll
help you out.
521
00:22:36,600 --> 00:22:37,601
We're gonna need
some wheels.
522
00:22:37,720 --> 00:22:38,767
I'll lend you a car.
523
00:22:38,840 --> 00:22:39,921
Then it's done.
524
00:22:40,000 --> 00:22:42,731
Yeah, using this address
and our superior instincts,
525
00:22:42,920 --> 00:22:44,524
you and your little girl
are gonna be having
526
00:22:44,600 --> 00:22:46,090
a family reunion
in no time.
527
00:22:46,240 --> 00:22:47,366
Cheers!
528
00:22:47,840 --> 00:22:49,365
Whoa! Wait.
Where did you get that?
529
00:22:50,040 --> 00:22:51,280
The Slurpee machine
in the back.
530
00:22:51,400 --> 00:22:52,925
That's embalming fluid.
531
00:22:53,800 --> 00:22:54,801
Oh.
532
00:22:55,360 --> 00:22:56,725
Does it have aspartame?
533
00:22:57,160 --> 00:22:58,241
No.
534
00:22:58,520 --> 00:22:59,681
Cool.
535
00:23:05,560 --> 00:23:06,891
(CHUCKLING)
536
00:23:12,080 --> 00:23:14,082
Hey, guys,
check this out!
537
00:23:19,840 --> 00:23:20,841
(CHUCKLES)
538
00:23:24,160 --> 00:23:25,161
(GROWLS)
539
00:23:25,320 --> 00:23:26,526
(ALL SCREAMING)
540
00:23:27,760 --> 00:23:28,886
(LAUGHS)
541
00:23:30,480 --> 00:23:31,845
(ALL LAUGH)
542
00:23:34,400 --> 00:23:36,846
What about the blue roads
with the big numbers?
543
00:23:37,160 --> 00:23:38,207
Those are rivers.
544
00:23:38,280 --> 00:23:39,327
They're rivers?
Yeah.
545
00:23:39,400 --> 00:23:40,890
We could get a boat.
546
00:23:44,720 --> 00:23:46,324
Boats are dangerous.
547
00:23:52,600 --> 00:23:53,886
(TIRES SQUEAL)
548
00:24:01,040 --> 00:24:02,280
This is it.
549
00:24:02,440 --> 00:24:05,046
6765 Elmwood.
550
00:24:05,600 --> 00:24:06,886
(SIGHS)
551
00:24:13,440 --> 00:24:14,521
You look nervous.
552
00:24:14,640 --> 00:24:16,290
I am nervous!
I'm about to meet my kid
553
00:24:16,360 --> 00:24:17,600
and I don't know
what to say to her.
554
00:24:17,680 --> 00:24:18,920
That's real easy, Har.
555
00:24:19,000 --> 00:24:21,367
You make a little small talk about
why you missed all those birthdays,
556
00:24:21,480 --> 00:24:23,130
holidays and graduations.
557
00:24:23,200 --> 00:24:25,168
Maybe a couple of dick
jokes to put her at ease.
558
00:24:25,480 --> 00:24:26,720
And boing, you hit
her up for the kidney.
559
00:24:26,800 --> 00:24:28,643
Okay. What if
she says no?
560
00:24:28,800 --> 00:24:29,801
She's not gonna say no.
561
00:24:29,880 --> 00:24:31,325
She's the fruit
of your loom.
562
00:24:31,400 --> 00:24:32,890
(KNOCKING ON DOOR)
563
00:24:35,320 --> 00:24:36,321
(GASPS)
564
00:24:37,000 --> 00:24:39,321
Suck me sideways.
565
00:24:40,080 --> 00:24:42,208
You're the spitting
image of your mother.
(CHUCKLES)
566
00:24:42,400 --> 00:24:44,004
You morons.
567
00:24:45,280 --> 00:24:47,726
This is the return address.
568
00:24:48,200 --> 00:24:52,046
Hers is on the side
with the stamp.
569
00:24:53,480 --> 00:24:54,481
Oh.
570
00:24:55,240 --> 00:24:57,242
But it's still uncanny!
(CHUCKLES)
571
00:24:59,280 --> 00:25:00,930
(TIRES SQUEALING)
572
00:25:19,720 --> 00:25:21,210
Oxford, Maryland, huh?
573
00:25:21,280 --> 00:25:24,204
So that's where
my little girl's been
living all these years.
574
00:25:25,040 --> 00:25:26,246
Hey, Har!
575
00:25:26,320 --> 00:25:28,288
Look it.
Giant nutcracker.
(WHIRRING)
576
00:25:28,600 --> 00:25:30,204
Oh.
(CHUCKLES)
577
00:25:31,200 --> 00:25:33,680
(IN DEEP VOICE) I want
578
00:25:33,880 --> 00:25:35,962
your nuts,
579
00:25:36,120 --> 00:25:38,407
Harry!
580
00:25:38,680 --> 00:25:39,886
(CHUCKLES)
581
00:25:41,440 --> 00:25:45,081
Boy, I sure wish I could
have been there for her
when she was little.
582
00:25:45,160 --> 00:25:46,241
Whatever.
583
00:25:46,320 --> 00:25:48,721
That's all water under
the fridge now, Har.
584
00:25:48,880 --> 00:25:49,881
Think of the bright side.
585
00:25:49,960 --> 00:25:51,280
You're finally
getting to meet her
586
00:25:51,440 --> 00:25:53,647
and you never had to change
all those poopie diapers.
587
00:25:53,760 --> 00:25:55,842
That's called being
a parent, Lloyd.
588
00:25:55,960 --> 00:25:59,089
Besides, I changed your
poopie diapers for 20 years.
589
00:26:09,200 --> 00:26:10,611
(LAUGHS)
590
00:26:10,800 --> 00:26:13,007
I totally sucked you in.
591
00:26:13,440 --> 00:26:15,488
Half the time,
it wasn't even my poop.
592
00:26:16,000 --> 00:26:17,286
(CHUCKLES)
593
00:26:22,800 --> 00:26:26,122
I wonder what it would have
been like to raise a child.
594
00:26:28,920 --> 00:26:31,685
Maybe I couldn't afford to send
her to the best public schools,
595
00:26:33,080 --> 00:26:35,731
but I'll bet I would have
been a pretty good dad.
596
00:26:42,920 --> 00:26:45,571
You don't need
training wheels.
You can do this.
597
00:26:46,000 --> 00:26:47,206
Here we go!
598
00:26:47,280 --> 00:26:48,770
MAN: Come on, come on!
599
00:26:51,560 --> 00:26:53,483
(ALL CHEERING)
No way!
600
00:26:53,640 --> 00:26:55,085
That was awesome!
601
00:26:55,520 --> 00:26:56,567
Awesome!
602
00:26:58,000 --> 00:26:59,843
Perfect. Okay.
603
00:27:00,160 --> 00:27:01,207
One,
604
00:27:01,520 --> 00:27:02,681
two,
605
00:27:03,440 --> 00:27:04,885
three.
606
00:27:05,200 --> 00:27:06,326
(GROANS)
607
00:27:10,080 --> 00:27:11,411
(CHUCKLING)
608
00:27:34,600 --> 00:27:35,726
Hey, Mr. Dunne.
609
00:27:35,840 --> 00:27:38,207
Hello, Baxter.
How are you?
Good to see you.
610
00:27:38,280 --> 00:27:39,406
Here you go, honey.
611
00:27:39,480 --> 00:27:40,970
Thank you, Mr. Dunne!
Bye, Dad!
612
00:27:42,280 --> 00:27:43,691
Isn't that good?
Mmm-hmm.
613
00:27:45,120 --> 00:27:46,770
LLOYD: Mr. Dunne!
614
00:27:49,360 --> 00:27:51,442
Mr. Dunne!
615
00:27:51,720 --> 00:27:53,961
Hey, Mr. Dunne!
616
00:27:55,360 --> 00:27:56,805
Do you mind?
617
00:27:56,880 --> 00:27:58,291
Bon appétit, kid!
618
00:27:59,440 --> 00:28:00,771
(MUNCHING)
619
00:28:02,040 --> 00:28:03,451
(SQUEAKING)
620
00:28:13,840 --> 00:28:14,966
Lloyd!
621
00:28:15,880 --> 00:28:17,086
What are you doing?
622
00:28:17,280 --> 00:28:19,203
I was trying to
clean off this smudge!
623
00:28:19,280 --> 00:28:20,406
But you know what?
624
00:28:20,840 --> 00:28:23,127
I think it might
be on the inside!
(LAUGHS)
625
00:28:23,440 --> 00:28:25,169
(EXHALES)
(HORN HONKING)
626
00:28:26,200 --> 00:28:28,441
ANNOUNCER: This type
of evening always provides
627
00:28:28,560 --> 00:28:29,641
nonstop surprises.
628
00:28:29,720 --> 00:28:31,290
Ah, look who's arrived.
Tom Brady
629
00:28:31,640 --> 00:28:34,484
with his gorgeous wife,
Gisele, by his side.
630
00:28:34,640 --> 00:28:37,689
Doesn't she look radiant?
Tom's in agreement, I think.
631
00:28:39,200 --> 00:28:41,328
Now that is hot.
632
00:28:41,880 --> 00:28:43,006
Yep-
633
00:28:43,360 --> 00:28:45,681
That's why he gets
all the girls.
634
00:28:50,880 --> 00:28:52,120
(TURNS OFF TV)
635
00:28:59,080 --> 00:29:00,366
(INHALES DEEPLY)
636
00:29:00,800 --> 00:29:02,802
It sure would be nice.
(EXHALES)
637
00:29:03,560 --> 00:29:04,721
What would be nice, Lloyd?
638
00:29:05,160 --> 00:29:06,924
Oh! You know,
639
00:29:07,000 --> 00:29:09,000
if she introduced me to
one of her hot girlfriends.
640
00:29:09,040 --> 00:29:10,804
(CHUCKLING) Girlfriends.
641
00:29:10,880 --> 00:29:12,245
She's 22!
642
00:29:12,600 --> 00:29:13,806
So?
643
00:29:13,880 --> 00:29:16,281
So, that's a lot
younger than you.
644
00:29:16,880 --> 00:29:17,881
Don't worry,
when we get home,
645
00:29:17,960 --> 00:29:19,962
I'm gonna fix you up
with someone your own age.
646
00:29:20,120 --> 00:29:22,202
My age? Gross!
647
00:29:23,360 --> 00:29:24,850
I mean, what would
we talk about?
648
00:29:25,400 --> 00:29:27,448
I don't know.
Same stuff you talked
about in high school
649
00:29:27,560 --> 00:29:30,803
when you took chicks down to
Oyster Swallow Cove.
(LAUGHS)
650
00:29:30,960 --> 00:29:32,564
Oyster Swallow Cove.
651
00:29:33,320 --> 00:29:34,970
There's a trip down
Mammary Lane.
652
00:29:35,240 --> 00:29:36,685
(BOTH GIGGLING)
653
00:29:40,600 --> 00:29:41,806
Oh, crap!
654
00:29:41,880 --> 00:29:43,211
We gotta get
back to Providence!
655
00:29:43,520 --> 00:29:44,726
What? Why?
656
00:29:44,800 --> 00:29:46,131
Remember I told you
Ice Pick had to make
657
00:29:46,200 --> 00:29:47,531
that rock candy
run down to Maine?
658
00:29:47,600 --> 00:29:48,681
Yeah.
659
00:29:48,800 --> 00:29:50,882
I forgot to get someone to
feed Butthole. (SCOFFS)
660
00:29:51,280 --> 00:29:53,123
Relax. I took care of it.
661
00:29:53,680 --> 00:29:54,806
You did?
662
00:29:54,880 --> 00:29:57,326
Yeah. Billy in 4-C's
gonna feed him.
663
00:29:57,920 --> 00:29:59,809
(CHUCKLING) Oh, great!
664
00:29:59,960 --> 00:30:01,600
Did you give him the key
to our apartment?
665
00:30:01,640 --> 00:30:02,687
No.
666
00:30:02,760 --> 00:30:04,603
You think
I want wheel
marks all over the rug?
667
00:30:04,680 --> 00:30:06,205
I just wrote him a note,
left some food
668
00:30:06,280 --> 00:30:08,567
and threw Butthole inside his
place when we were leaving.
669
00:30:09,840 --> 00:30:13,561
But, Lloyd, Billy has over a
hundred rare birds in there!
670
00:30:14,160 --> 00:30:15,241
So?
671
00:30:15,480 --> 00:30:17,926
They're not gonna mess
with a 30-pound alley cat.
672
00:30:18,080 --> 00:30:19,241
(CHUCKLES) Sheesh!
673
00:30:20,480 --> 00:30:22,687
Hey, gang! I'm home!
674
00:30:24,120 --> 00:30:25,246
Guys?
675
00:30:25,360 --> 00:30:26,361
(WHISTLING)
676
00:30:27,160 --> 00:30:28,286
You sure are quiet.
677
00:30:28,880 --> 00:30:30,120
(PARTS)
678
00:30:31,320 --> 00:30:33,209
(SQUAWKS)
Speak to me, Siskel.
679
00:30:33,360 --> 00:30:35,647
The horror! The horror!
680
00:30:41,000 --> 00:30:42,525
(HORN HONKING)
681
00:30:43,240 --> 00:30:44,969
Are you sure you
don't wanna come, Dad?
682
00:30:45,040 --> 00:30:47,441
It's not gonna be nearly
as much fun without you.
683
00:30:47,520 --> 00:30:49,249
Oh, of course
I wanna come, monkey,
684
00:30:49,320 --> 00:30:50,606
but it's out
of the question.
685
00:30:50,720 --> 00:30:51,721
(COUGHING)
686
00:30:52,560 --> 00:30:53,721
I'm way too
flu-ey to travel.
687
00:30:53,800 --> 00:30:56,485
But all the geeky science guys
are gonna be so disappointed.
688
00:30:56,560 --> 00:30:59,006
They were finally gonna
get to meet you in person!
689
00:30:59,080 --> 00:31:00,081
PINCHELOW: So sorry, honey.
690
00:31:00,160 --> 00:31:02,401
Ms. Pinchelow,
your car is here.
691
00:31:02,600 --> 00:31:03,726
PENNY: Thanks, Travis!
692
00:31:04,640 --> 00:31:05,846
Okay!
693
00:31:05,920 --> 00:31:07,524
Take care
of my dad, Adele.
694
00:31:08,400 --> 00:31:09,401
Oh, oh, oh, oh, whoa!
695
00:31:09,520 --> 00:31:11,320
Penny, do you have the
speech I wrote for you?
696
00:31:11,440 --> 00:31:12,521
I do.
697
00:31:12,640 --> 00:31:13,721
Good. Oh!
698
00:31:13,840 --> 00:31:15,400
I almost forgot.
There's one more thing.
699
00:31:16,160 --> 00:31:18,288
I want you
to take this box
700
00:31:18,640 --> 00:31:21,849
and personally give it to the head
of the conference, Dr. Walcott,
701
00:31:22,000 --> 00:31:24,924
and say how sorry I am
that I can't be there.
702
00:31:25,000 --> 00:31:26,047
Got it.
703
00:31:26,120 --> 00:31:28,043
Oh, what's in the box, honey?
Mmm.
704
00:31:28,160 --> 00:31:30,003
Just a small gift.
705
00:31:30,120 --> 00:31:32,043
Wow, Penny.
You're giving a speech?
706
00:31:32,200 --> 00:31:34,771
Oh, it's only a couple of
sentences on the last day,
707
00:31:34,960 --> 00:31:37,122
but then I'm picking up
a reward for my dad.
708
00:31:37,200 --> 00:31:38,440
Award, honey.
709
00:31:38,840 --> 00:31:40,968
Did you remember
to bring the ATM card
I gave you?
710
00:31:41,120 --> 00:31:44,761
Yes. But what's
my PIN number again?
I keep forgetting.
711
00:31:44,960 --> 00:31:46,724
It's 11-11.
712
00:31:48,760 --> 00:31:50,762
I thought it had
to be four numbers.
713
00:31:51,880 --> 00:31:53,086
There are four numbers.
714
00:31:53,480 --> 00:31:56,165
One-one-one-one.
715
00:31:56,320 --> 00:31:57,321
(HORN HONKING)
716
00:31:57,400 --> 00:31:59,801
Time to go!
Come on, Penny.
717
00:32:08,360 --> 00:32:09,691
(BARKING)
718
00:32:12,240 --> 00:32:13,446
Aw!
719
00:32:15,480 --> 00:32:18,962
Are you smiling at me?
Are you smiling at me?
720
00:32:19,200 --> 00:32:21,362
He's a good boy!
Yes, he is!
721
00:32:21,440 --> 00:32:23,010
Let me see
your purty teeth!
722
00:32:23,080 --> 00:32:24,366
Oh! Say it,
don't spray it!
723
00:32:25,000 --> 00:32:26,365
(CHUCKLES)
724
00:32:31,840 --> 00:32:33,569
(MUSIC PLAYING ON RADIO)
725
00:32:36,240 --> 00:32:39,130
We're almost there.
The guy told me to
get off at the next exit.
726
00:32:39,200 --> 00:32:40,929
Shh. They're picking
the lottery balls.
727
00:32:41,200 --> 00:32:44,602
ANNOUNCER: Here's today's Mega-Lottery
picks, worth 34 million dollars.
728
00:32:44,840 --> 00:32:47,889
The first number is 44.
The next is 2.
729
00:32:48,160 --> 00:32:52,131
38, 24, 21 and 54.
730
00:32:52,440 --> 00:32:55,728
Cripes! I was so close!
731
00:32:56,080 --> 00:32:58,287
I had all the right numbers,
but in the wrong order.
732
00:33:02,480 --> 00:33:04,642
PINCHELOW: Honey,
my stomach is killing me.
733
00:33:04,800 --> 00:33:06,325
Can you bring me
some more Pepto?
734
00:33:06,480 --> 00:33:08,403
I'm making you some
nice warm oatmeal.
735
00:33:08,760 --> 00:33:10,330
It will settle your tummy.
736
00:33:10,960 --> 00:33:12,849
(BREATHES DEEPLY)
737
00:33:23,720 --> 00:33:24,926
What are you doing?
738
00:33:27,720 --> 00:33:29,722
I'm fixing lunch
for my husband.
739
00:33:40,240 --> 00:33:41,685
That's not enough.
740
00:33:42,320 --> 00:33:43,321
(SCOFFS)
741
00:33:43,720 --> 00:33:46,405
We gotta pick up
the pace a little bit.
We want him dead
742
00:33:46,520 --> 00:33:49,330
before Dumbelina gets back from
that egghead convention, remember?
743
00:33:49,400 --> 00:33:51,084
Slow it down.
744
00:33:51,160 --> 00:33:54,050
If we put too much in at once,
it could show up in an autopsy.
745
00:33:54,120 --> 00:33:55,246
Not this stuff.
746
00:33:55,640 --> 00:33:57,881
I got it from
my twin brother.
He's Special Ops.
747
00:33:58,040 --> 00:33:59,565
It's totally undetectable.
748
00:34:00,720 --> 00:34:02,768
Now come on.
Let's hurry this up.
749
00:34:03,280 --> 00:34:05,044
That way we have a few
extra days to ourselves,
750
00:34:05,120 --> 00:34:06,804
to enjoy our inheritance.
751
00:34:07,160 --> 00:34:09,322
Oh, there's gonna be
plenty of time for that.
752
00:34:10,000 --> 00:34:13,163
Five million dollars buys
a lot of champagne.
753
00:34:15,120 --> 00:34:16,690
(MOANING)
754
00:34:17,320 --> 00:34:18,481
(BREATHES DEEPLY)
755
00:34:18,560 --> 00:34:19,686
(WHISPERING)
Give it to me.
756
00:34:21,280 --> 00:34:22,281
(SIGHS)
757
00:34:24,640 --> 00:34:25,801
(MOANS)
758
00:34:27,040 --> 00:34:28,371
You like that,
don't you?
759
00:34:28,640 --> 00:34:30,404
Yeah. It's all right.
760
00:34:30,560 --> 00:34:31,846
(MOANS)
761
00:34:32,120 --> 00:34:33,804
I'll be honest.
It's not my favorite thing.
762
00:34:34,160 --> 00:34:35,525
(DOORBELL DINGING RAPIDLY)
763
00:34:36,160 --> 00:34:37,571
Who the hell is that?
764
00:34:40,480 --> 00:34:42,289
Boy, this is quite
a shack, huh, Har?
765
00:34:42,440 --> 00:34:44,807
Yeah, but I bet if you pulled
the weeds off the walls
766
00:34:44,920 --> 00:34:47,764
and slapped up
some aluminum siding,
it wouldn't be half bad.
767
00:34:47,840 --> 00:34:50,411
Yeah. Those things
are rat ladders.
768
00:34:50,920 --> 00:34:52,081
ADELE: Please stop that.
769
00:34:52,160 --> 00:34:54,925
There's a very sick man in
here who's trying to rest.
770
00:34:55,080 --> 00:34:58,562
I'm sorry, lady! We're
looking for Fanny Felcher!
771
00:34:59,640 --> 00:35:00,846
The one with the kidneys.
772
00:35:00,920 --> 00:35:02,046
Is she there?
773
00:35:02,280 --> 00:35:04,601
There is no one here
by that horrible name.
774
00:35:04,880 --> 00:35:06,041
Now go away.
775
00:35:06,120 --> 00:35:08,771
Is this 6765
Elmwood Avenue,
776
00:35:08,840 --> 00:35:10,604
Cranston,
Rhode Island?
777
00:35:11,400 --> 00:35:12,811
ADELE:
You're in Maryland.
778
00:35:13,160 --> 00:35:14,650
(GROANING)
The side with the stamp!
779
00:35:14,800 --> 00:35:17,770
(STAMMERING) I mean, uh,
is this 1111 Foothill Road?
780
00:35:17,840 --> 00:35:18,966
That's right.
781
00:35:19,040 --> 00:35:20,246
But there are
no Felchers here.
782
00:35:20,320 --> 00:35:22,004
This is the Pinchelow
residence.
783
00:35:22,160 --> 00:35:24,242
Wait a second.
My friend Harry here
784
00:35:24,400 --> 00:35:26,880
gave his daughter up for
adoption 20-something years ago
785
00:35:27,040 --> 00:35:29,042
and we were told this
is where she lives.
786
00:35:29,120 --> 00:35:30,246
It's kind of a medical
787
00:35:30,680 --> 00:35:31,806
emergency
that we find her.
788
00:35:31,880 --> 00:35:33,723
As long as she
doesn't have AIDS.
(INTERCOM BEEPS)
789
00:35:33,800 --> 00:35:35,325
PINCHELOW: Adele, darling,
whoever they are,
790
00:35:35,400 --> 00:35:36,811
they must be
talking about Penny!
791
00:35:36,880 --> 00:35:38,120
She was adopted.
792
00:35:38,520 --> 00:35:40,682
I'll see them.
Let them in.
(INTERCOM BUZZING)
793
00:35:42,760 --> 00:35:44,205
What the hell was that?
794
00:35:44,840 --> 00:35:46,842
That's exactly the kind of
random crap we don't need!
795
00:35:46,920 --> 00:35:48,046
Relax.
796
00:35:52,440 --> 00:35:54,124
Would you like some
hot tea with lemon?
797
00:35:54,520 --> 00:35:57,000
Oh, no. I can see
why you might think that.
798
00:35:57,280 --> 00:35:59,044
Two gentlemen
traveling together.
799
00:35:59,120 --> 00:36:00,281
But we're straight.
800
00:36:02,160 --> 00:36:03,525
PINCHELOW:
I must tell you, Harry,
801
00:36:04,400 --> 00:36:06,243
this is an unexpected treat.
802
00:36:06,840 --> 00:36:08,046
Yeah! Me, too.
803
00:36:08,520 --> 00:36:12,320
You know, I always wondered what
Penny's natural father was like.
804
00:36:12,680 --> 00:36:14,205
When my late wife
and I adopted her,
805
00:36:14,280 --> 00:36:16,561
we weren't given much information
about her birth parents.
806
00:36:16,680 --> 00:36:20,082
We were only told
that her mother was single
and that she was...
807
00:36:22,000 --> 00:36:23,411
You can say it, dear.
808
00:36:23,880 --> 00:36:25,882
She was rumored
to be a titanic whore.
809
00:36:26,040 --> 00:36:29,362
That's a lie! Fraida never
stepped foot on the Titanic!
810
00:36:29,720 --> 00:36:31,722
They must be talking about the
time she did the night crew
811
00:36:31,800 --> 00:36:33,484
on the Block Island Ferry.
812
00:36:33,560 --> 00:36:34,561
(PINCHELOW LAUGHING)
813
00:36:34,640 --> 00:36:35,687
That's good!
814
00:36:35,760 --> 00:36:36,841
(BOTH CHUCKLING)
815
00:36:36,920 --> 00:36:38,922
So, is Penny here?
816
00:36:39,080 --> 00:36:40,241
Unfortunately, no.
817
00:36:40,320 --> 00:36:41,845
She flew out
this morning to El Paso.
818
00:36:42,000 --> 00:36:43,684
She's going to
the KEN Conference.
819
00:36:43,800 --> 00:36:46,121
What? Who's this Ken guy?
820
00:36:46,200 --> 00:36:47,361
No. No.
821
00:36:48,080 --> 00:36:50,242
The KEN Conference
is a symposium
822
00:36:50,400 --> 00:36:51,731
where the year's
newest technologies,
823
00:36:51,800 --> 00:36:53,131
creative concepts
and ideas
824
00:36:53,200 --> 00:36:54,929
are introduced
and discussed.
825
00:36:55,200 --> 00:36:56,406
Wow.
826
00:36:56,480 --> 00:36:59,450
That's the single
most boring sentence
I ever heard.
827
00:36:59,560 --> 00:37:02,166
Adele, what do you say
we call Penny right now
828
00:37:02,280 --> 00:37:04,647
with the news that her biological
father is looking for her?
829
00:37:04,760 --> 00:37:06,171
She'll be so excited.
830
00:37:06,920 --> 00:37:10,049
She might not be as excited
as you think, Doc.
831
00:37:10,160 --> 00:37:12,288
When her mother tried to
get in touch with her,
832
00:37:12,440 --> 00:37:14,363
she sent this
letter right back.
833
00:37:16,320 --> 00:37:17,321
PINCHELOW: Mmm.
834
00:37:17,680 --> 00:37:19,045
That's interesting.
835
00:37:19,320 --> 00:37:20,685
What's that, dear?
836
00:37:21,120 --> 00:37:22,531
Uh, nothing.
837
00:37:22,600 --> 00:37:24,011
She just, uh,
never mentioned it.
838
00:37:25,320 --> 00:37:26,680
But that was
a couple of years ago.
839
00:37:26,720 --> 00:37:29,121
I'm sure she'll appreciate
all the trouble you've gone to
840
00:37:29,200 --> 00:37:31,248
to find her.
Let's call her.
841
00:37:31,320 --> 00:37:32,321
(CELL PHONE BEEPS)
842
00:37:34,320 --> 00:37:35,970
(BREATHES DEEPLY)
843
00:37:36,840 --> 00:37:38,444
It's ringing!
(CELL PHONE BUZZING)
844
00:37:43,160 --> 00:37:44,241
(BEEPS)
845
00:37:44,320 --> 00:37:45,367
(WHISPERING)
Whoever this is,
846
00:37:45,440 --> 00:37:46,930
we're in the middle of
something really important.
847
00:37:47,080 --> 00:37:48,241
Can you call back later?
848
00:37:48,320 --> 00:37:49,731
No, I can't
call back later.
849
00:37:49,800 --> 00:37:52,400
I have something to
tell you that might freak
you out a little bit,
850
00:37:53,880 --> 00:37:55,291
but this is your dad.
851
00:37:55,760 --> 00:37:57,489
(WHISPERING)
What? Hold on.
852
00:37:57,920 --> 00:38:00,844
Hey, guys, I know
this is weird timing,
but I gotta take this.
853
00:38:00,920 --> 00:38:02,081
It's my dead dad.
854
00:38:02,160 --> 00:38:03,400
She's got me on hold.
855
00:38:04,880 --> 00:38:06,882
Dad, what did you do with
all those Penthouses?
856
00:38:06,960 --> 00:38:08,007
Did you throw them out?
857
00:38:08,120 --> 00:38:09,770
No, they're under
my mattress. Why?
858
00:38:09,920 --> 00:38:12,082
You idiot,
that is Penny's phone!
859
00:38:12,200 --> 00:38:13,201
Oh.
860
00:38:13,280 --> 00:38:14,850
Oh, no. No.
861
00:38:14,920 --> 00:38:16,843
No! This is awful!
862
00:38:17,160 --> 00:38:18,571
She forgot the package!
863
00:38:18,640 --> 00:38:20,483
What are you doing?
You shouldn't be up!
864
00:38:21,000 --> 00:38:22,729
Just relax. We can
overnight it to her.
865
00:38:22,800 --> 00:38:24,484
No! No. We can't.
866
00:38:24,640 --> 00:38:27,211
The culmination of my
life's work is in this box.
867
00:38:27,360 --> 00:38:28,885
It's much too
valuable to ship.
868
00:38:29,560 --> 00:38:31,289
(STAMMERING) I thought you
said it was just a gift.
869
00:38:31,560 --> 00:38:33,403
Oh, it is.
870
00:38:33,480 --> 00:38:35,482
A gift to all humanity.
871
00:38:36,480 --> 00:38:38,289
I wanted it to be
a surprise, Adele.
(EXHALES)
872
00:38:38,360 --> 00:38:40,601
That's why I was unveiling
it at the KEN Conference.
873
00:38:40,680 --> 00:38:41,761
Wow.
874
00:38:41,880 --> 00:38:43,880
Something like that's gotta
be worth millions, huh?
875
00:38:44,120 --> 00:38:46,487
Try billions.
Billions?
876
00:38:46,600 --> 00:38:49,171
PINCHELOW: Oh, yes.
But I won't get a dime.
877
00:38:49,440 --> 00:38:51,761
It would be morally wrong
to profit from this.
878
00:38:52,240 --> 00:38:53,241
Huh?
879
00:38:53,560 --> 00:38:56,131
This box contains one
of the most important
880
00:38:56,200 --> 00:38:58,043
discoveries in
human history
881
00:38:58,120 --> 00:39:01,090
and all mankind deserves
free access to it
882
00:39:01,160 --> 00:39:03,766
and that is why
I have relinquished
883
00:39:04,000 --> 00:39:05,923
all proprietary rights.
884
00:39:06,680 --> 00:39:08,091
Wait, when did
you do that?
885
00:39:08,160 --> 00:39:09,650
It's all in the speech
886
00:39:09,720 --> 00:39:12,200
that Penny's going to read
at the award ceremony.
887
00:39:12,880 --> 00:39:14,803
Oh, my God,
that's so nice!
(CHUCKLES)
888
00:39:17,680 --> 00:39:19,842
What in God's name?
889
00:39:20,040 --> 00:39:22,691
You guys sounded busy,
so we built a couch-fort.
890
00:39:23,560 --> 00:39:25,005
You wanna come in,
Dr. P?
891
00:39:25,160 --> 00:39:26,605
Sorry, no girls allowed.
892
00:39:27,240 --> 00:39:28,890
Boys rule, girls drool.
893
00:39:28,960 --> 00:39:30,371
(LAUGHING)
894
00:39:31,240 --> 00:39:32,480
Wait a minute.
895
00:39:32,920 --> 00:39:34,490
I have an idea.
896
00:39:35,000 --> 00:39:36,889
Why don't we have
Harry and Lloyd
897
00:39:36,960 --> 00:39:38,803
hand-deliver the box to Penny?
(GASPS)
898
00:39:38,880 --> 00:39:41,850
That way Harry will get to
meet his daughter in person
899
00:39:41,920 --> 00:39:44,241
and you'll be assured
the box gets there safely.
900
00:39:44,880 --> 00:39:46,120
(CHUCKLES)
901
00:39:47,200 --> 00:39:48,611
(WHISPERING)
Are you insane?
902
00:39:48,760 --> 00:39:52,242
You think I'm just going
to hand over my invention
to these 10-year-olds?
903
00:39:52,320 --> 00:39:53,970
Oh, don't you worry. We'll
have Travis go with them.
904
00:39:54,160 --> 00:39:55,764
He won't let anything
happen to the box.
905
00:39:55,920 --> 00:39:57,684
And he will lead
them straight to Penny.
906
00:39:58,280 --> 00:39:59,520
LLOYD: You can
count on us, sir.
907
00:39:59,920 --> 00:40:01,285
Our word is our bond.
908
00:40:03,000 --> 00:40:04,604
(IN DEEP VOICE)
James Bond.
909
00:40:06,920 --> 00:40:08,081
(YELLS)
910
00:40:08,160 --> 00:40:09,525
(BOTH GIGGLING)
911
00:40:10,080 --> 00:40:12,686
I'm going with them?
Why the hell did
you tell him that?
912
00:40:12,840 --> 00:40:15,002
Do you not realize what
just fell into our laps?
913
00:40:15,160 --> 00:40:18,209
Our five million just
turned into a billion.
914
00:40:18,360 --> 00:40:19,521
LLOYD: What's wrong
with this thing?
915
00:40:19,680 --> 00:40:21,560
Yeah, but he said he was
gonna give it all away.
916
00:40:21,680 --> 00:40:24,650
Not if we get to Penny before
she reads that speech.
917
00:40:37,720 --> 00:40:38,801
LLOYD: Hey,
918
00:40:39,280 --> 00:40:41,203
when is this
KEN thing, anyway?
919
00:40:41,280 --> 00:40:42,611
It actually starts today,
920
00:40:42,760 --> 00:40:44,842
but Penny doesn't give her speech
until the night of May 2nd.
921
00:40:44,960 --> 00:40:46,610
So that gives us...
922
00:40:46,880 --> 00:40:48,120
How many days
are in April?
923
00:40:48,280 --> 00:40:49,964
"Thirty days
have September,
924
00:40:50,040 --> 00:40:51,804
"all the rest
I can't remember."
925
00:40:52,080 --> 00:40:54,401
Must be 31 because
nothing rhymes with August.
926
00:40:54,560 --> 00:40:56,050
LLOYD: No,
I think it's 32, Har.
927
00:40:56,360 --> 00:40:57,600
April's a leap month.
928
00:40:57,760 --> 00:40:59,683
31.
32.
929
00:40:59,760 --> 00:41:00,841
31.
32.
930
00:41:00,920 --> 00:41:03,082
31.31,1,1,1!
2,2,2!
931
00:41:03,160 --> 00:41:04,605
30! There's 30!
932
00:41:04,720 --> 00:41:05,801
Thank you!
933
00:41:06,720 --> 00:41:07,801
You said 31.
934
00:41:07,880 --> 00:41:09,405
Yeah, but I was closer.
935
00:41:09,760 --> 00:41:11,410
TRAVIS: Hey, guys,
where's the box?
936
00:41:11,800 --> 00:41:12,926
What box?
937
00:41:13,800 --> 00:41:15,723
The box with the billion-dollar
invention in it.
938
00:41:17,640 --> 00:41:19,165
Lloyd, what did you
do with the box?
939
00:41:19,320 --> 00:41:21,163
Me? You had it.
940
00:41:21,240 --> 00:41:23,288
No, remember we stopped
at that truck stop
941
00:41:23,400 --> 00:41:24,920
and we were kicking
field goals with it
942
00:41:25,000 --> 00:41:26,331
out in that parking lot?
LLOYD: Yeah.
943
00:41:26,400 --> 00:41:28,641
I remember I kicked one
over the telephone wires,
and you said...
944
00:41:28,720 --> 00:41:31,087
You know what,
you're right.
I did have it.
945
00:41:36,000 --> 00:41:37,411
Look at that!
(HARRY GASPS)
946
00:41:37,760 --> 00:41:39,842
(SING SONG)
I just saved humanity!
947
00:41:40,480 --> 00:41:42,448
You know what? Maybe I
should hold on to that box.
948
00:41:42,640 --> 00:41:44,529
I don't think so, mister.
949
00:41:44,600 --> 00:41:46,329
Dr. P encrusted that to me.
950
00:41:46,520 --> 00:41:48,960
And I'm gonna make sure
it gets to my daughter,
safe and sound.
951
00:41:49,360 --> 00:41:52,011
Yeah, well, you're doing
a great job so far.
952
00:41:52,440 --> 00:41:54,090
You guys wanna play
"He Who Smelt it"?
953
00:41:54,160 --> 00:41:55,321
Yeah.
954
00:41:55,600 --> 00:41:56,681
What's that?
955
00:41:56,760 --> 00:41:58,922
It's complicated,
so pay attention.
956
00:41:59,000 --> 00:42:02,607
We put the windows up,
first one who smells
a fart gets a point.
957
00:42:02,760 --> 00:42:04,330
If you say who dealt it,
958
00:42:04,480 --> 00:42:05,641
double points.
959
00:42:05,760 --> 00:42:07,125
But if you say
you smelled a fart
960
00:42:07,200 --> 00:42:08,201
and nobody farted,
961
00:42:08,280 --> 00:42:09,406
like if we were just passing
a slaughterhouse...
962
00:42:09,480 --> 00:42:10,561
False fart!
963
00:42:10,640 --> 00:42:13,450
...you lose a point.
And you can't smell
your own farts, either.
964
00:42:14,160 --> 00:42:16,288
Are you guys kidding?
No! No!
965
00:42:16,440 --> 00:42:19,410
I'm not gonna sit around
sniffing your farts like
some kinda truffle pig.
966
00:42:19,480 --> 00:42:20,527
Forget it!
(CHUCKLES)
967
00:42:20,640 --> 00:42:22,483
Okay, fine. Lloyd and I
will play one-on-one.
968
00:42:22,640 --> 00:42:23,687
Yeah, head-to-head.
969
00:42:23,760 --> 00:42:25,364
How can you
play one-on-one?
970
00:42:25,720 --> 00:42:27,051
If you smell a fart,
and you didn't do it,
971
00:42:27,120 --> 00:42:28,804
isn't it obvious
the other guy did?
972
00:42:31,400 --> 00:42:33,129
I thought you said
you never played before.
973
00:42:33,320 --> 00:42:35,368
Yeah. Sounds like
he wrote the rulebook.
974
00:42:35,880 --> 00:42:37,405
I think we might have
a hustler here, Har.
975
00:42:37,480 --> 00:42:38,481
Uh-huh.
976
00:42:46,160 --> 00:42:47,321
What are you doing?
977
00:42:48,920 --> 00:42:50,046
I forgot.
978
00:42:50,320 --> 00:42:51,651
TRAVIS: Uh, you know what?
I'm going to make a rule.
979
00:42:51,880 --> 00:42:54,201
There will be no fart games
while I'm in the car, got it?
980
00:42:54,320 --> 00:42:55,367
Wow.
981
00:42:55,480 --> 00:42:56,891
Who made you
king of the car?
982
00:42:58,000 --> 00:42:59,240
I know how to settle this.
983
00:42:59,400 --> 00:43:01,368
I'm thinking of a number
between one and three.
984
00:43:01,480 --> 00:43:03,164
Whoever guesses it
gets to be king of the car.
985
00:43:03,240 --> 00:43:04,366
One!
No.
986
00:43:04,480 --> 00:43:05,845
Three?
Nope.
987
00:43:07,520 --> 00:43:08,681
Okay, what is it?
988
00:43:10,160 --> 00:43:11,160
Two.
989
00:43:11,240 --> 00:43:13,527
(GROANS)
(YELLING) I swear
I was gonna say that!
990
00:43:14,520 --> 00:43:17,046
All right, so it's agreed,
I'm king of the car, right?
991
00:43:17,680 --> 00:43:18,806
Fine.
992
00:43:18,880 --> 00:43:19,927
Excuse me,
Your Highness,
993
00:43:20,000 --> 00:43:22,401
would you grab me
a Slim Jim
out of the back?
994
00:43:23,000 --> 00:43:24,206
One of the long ones.
995
00:43:25,000 --> 00:43:26,764
TRAVIS: Yeah.
(GRUNTS)
996
00:43:28,080 --> 00:43:29,286
(BOTH FARTING)
997
00:43:29,520 --> 00:43:30,851
TRAVIS: Oh, hey,
what the hell?
998
00:43:33,040 --> 00:43:34,405
On, God! Hey!
999
00:43:34,520 --> 00:43:36,045
No! Hey!
1000
00:43:36,320 --> 00:43:37,765
(GRUNTS)
1001
00:43:38,360 --> 00:43:39,361
(SCREAMING)
1002
00:43:39,520 --> 00:43:41,204
What is that?
Oh, God!
1003
00:43:41,760 --> 00:43:42,886
(GROANING)
1004
00:43:43,640 --> 00:43:44,880
Look, Harry.
1005
00:43:45,040 --> 00:43:46,405
He's hooked on crack.
1006
00:43:46,480 --> 00:43:47,720
(LAUGHING)
1007
00:43:48,640 --> 00:43:51,246
TRAVIS: For the love of God,
have mercy!
1008
00:43:51,800 --> 00:43:53,962
HERBERT: Hello, you've
reached Herbert Felcher
1009
00:43:54,040 --> 00:43:56,122
at Felcher and Felcher
Funeral Parlor.
1010
00:43:56,320 --> 00:43:58,163
Please leave a
message at the beep.
(BEEPS)
1011
00:43:58,280 --> 00:44:01,250
Hi! This is a private
message for Fraida Felcher.
1012
00:44:01,320 --> 00:44:03,641
Would you please tell
Fraida that Harry called?
1013
00:44:03,720 --> 00:44:04,926
Harry Dunne.
1014
00:44:05,240 --> 00:44:07,891
The guy who knocked her up
20-something years ago.
1015
00:44:08,160 --> 00:44:11,323
Um, pleasure finally
meeting you all,
by the way.
1016
00:44:12,080 --> 00:44:15,846
Anyway, would you tell her that
I've located our daughter.
1017
00:44:15,920 --> 00:44:16,921
(CAMERA CLICKS)
1018
00:44:17,000 --> 00:44:20,083
She's at a thing called the
KEN Conference in El Paso.
1019
00:44:20,920 --> 00:44:22,922
The town named
after the bean dip.
1020
00:44:31,280 --> 00:44:32,441
(BABY CRYING)
1021
00:44:51,320 --> 00:44:52,970
Oh, that's sweet!
1022
00:44:55,120 --> 00:44:56,201
Bye, Grandma!
1023
00:44:56,280 --> 00:44:57,680
(IN MAN LY VOICE)
Have fun, sweetie.
1024
00:45:01,200 --> 00:45:02,440
WOMAN: Now,
there's a real man.
1025
00:45:02,960 --> 00:45:05,201
I bet you he don't
pee sitting down.
1026
00:45:06,880 --> 00:45:08,291
(MUSIC PLAYING)
1027
00:45:18,120 --> 00:45:19,121
(BOTH SCREAMING)
1028
00:45:20,320 --> 00:45:21,321
(GRUNTING)
1029
00:45:22,680 --> 00:45:24,409
Don't touch that joystick!
(STRAINING)
1030
00:45:24,800 --> 00:45:25,801
(AIR HISSING)
1031
00:45:27,320 --> 00:45:28,321
(BOTH GASP)
1032
00:45:29,520 --> 00:45:30,965
STUDENT: Wow, look!
1033
00:45:34,640 --> 00:45:35,801
Let my people
1034
00:45:36,320 --> 00:45:37,401
go!
(ALL SCREAM)
1035
00:45:37,480 --> 00:45:38,561
Harry!
1036
00:45:41,160 --> 00:45:42,161
(GRUNTING)
1037
00:45:42,240 --> 00:45:44,720
It hurts, Lloyd.
It hurts so bad.
1038
00:45:44,880 --> 00:45:47,804
Which one hurts, Harry?
This one? Or this one? (GROANS)
1039
00:45:47,880 --> 00:45:50,770
Stop it! Lloyd, please,
1040
00:45:51,040 --> 00:45:52,246
save my daughter.
1041
00:45:52,320 --> 00:45:53,526
And then
1042
00:45:53,760 --> 00:45:56,730
I want you to bone her
like a chicken cutlet.
1043
00:45:56,840 --> 00:45:58,080
You hear me, mister?
1044
00:45:58,320 --> 00:45:59,845
(GASPS)
(CHOKES)
1045
00:46:02,160 --> 00:46:03,446
(ALL GASP)
1046
00:46:04,920 --> 00:46:06,206
(SCREAMING)
1047
00:46:12,640 --> 00:46:13,641
Huh?
1048
00:46:13,760 --> 00:46:14,807
(ALL GRUNT)
1049
00:46:20,520 --> 00:46:21,521
(ALL SCREAMING)
1050
00:46:24,200 --> 00:46:25,326
(GRUNTS)
(GROANS)
1051
00:46:28,160 --> 00:46:29,207
(GASPS)
1052
00:46:29,640 --> 00:46:30,766
(ALL SCREAMING)
1053
00:46:35,240 --> 00:46:36,241
(GROANS)
1054
00:46:38,360 --> 00:46:39,885
Looking for these?
1055
00:46:40,120 --> 00:46:41,565
(LAUGHS)
(SNIFFLES)
1056
00:46:42,040 --> 00:46:43,405
(CHOKING)
1057
00:47:15,080 --> 00:47:16,445
(WHISTLES) Oh!
1058
00:47:18,760 --> 00:47:20,171
What are you doing?
1059
00:47:21,240 --> 00:47:22,810
Oh. Uh...
1060
00:47:25,520 --> 00:47:26,760
She's all clean, sir.
1061
00:47:27,360 --> 00:47:28,771
You're good to go.
1062
00:47:29,320 --> 00:47:30,606
(MUTTERING)
Nutcase.
1063
00:47:33,200 --> 00:47:34,611
Hey, guys.
1064
00:47:34,920 --> 00:47:35,921
(SPITS)
1065
00:47:40,080 --> 00:47:41,969
(SIGHS) Let's call
a truce, huh?
1066
00:47:42,280 --> 00:47:43,770
I think we got off
on the wrong foot.
1067
00:47:44,120 --> 00:47:46,600
I don't wanna argue with you guys
all the way down to El Paso.
1068
00:47:47,040 --> 00:47:48,849
So what do you say?
Peace?
1069
00:47:50,560 --> 00:47:52,449
Come on, bring it in!
1070
00:47:53,160 --> 00:47:54,924
(CHUCKLES)
Yeah, why not?
1071
00:47:56,960 --> 00:47:58,007
Hmm.
1072
00:47:58,080 --> 00:47:59,127
Okay-
1073
00:47:59,240 --> 00:48:02,164
Hey, all right. All right,
that's good. Mmm...
1074
00:48:02,480 --> 00:48:04,084
All right, all right, all right.
Aw.
1075
00:48:04,520 --> 00:48:06,488
Hey! Have you guys
ever played "Funnel Nuts"?
1076
00:48:06,800 --> 00:48:07,847
What?
1077
00:48:07,960 --> 00:48:10,167
Oh, come on. You guys have
had to play Funnel Nuts.
1078
00:48:10,480 --> 00:48:12,130
This is the best game
ever invented.
1079
00:48:12,320 --> 00:48:13,367
Check it out,
you take the funnel,
1080
00:48:13,480 --> 00:48:15,005
you put it in the front of
your pants like that, right?
1081
00:48:15,440 --> 00:48:18,842
Okay? Then you put a peanut
on your nose like this,
1082
00:48:19,040 --> 00:48:20,530
and then when
you're ready...
1083
00:48:21,280 --> 00:48:22,725
No way!
1084
00:48:22,800 --> 00:48:24,040
You gotta be kidding!
1085
00:48:24,320 --> 00:48:25,680
That's not right!
(TRAVIS CHUCKLES)
1086
00:48:26,480 --> 00:48:28,528
The person who gets
the most nuts wins.
1087
00:48:28,640 --> 00:48:29,846
Now, who's gonna
play me first?
1088
00:48:30,320 --> 00:48:31,731
I'll do it. I got it.
1089
00:48:32,200 --> 00:48:33,884
This is mine!
You always go first!
1090
00:48:34,040 --> 00:48:35,166
I got it first!
1091
00:48:35,280 --> 00:48:37,123
Guys, hold on,
all right? Look.
1092
00:48:37,440 --> 00:48:39,840
You guys play each
other first, and then
I'll play the winner.
1093
00:48:40,800 --> 00:48:41,881
All right.
1094
00:48:42,160 --> 00:48:44,288
All right.
Here you go.
1095
00:48:45,160 --> 00:48:46,491
Take your time.
It takes time.
1096
00:48:46,560 --> 00:48:47,846
Get a good balance
on that.
1097
00:48:48,000 --> 00:48:49,126
Okay.
Look way up high.
1098
00:48:50,000 --> 00:48:52,685
Good. Okay,
keep looking at the sky.
When you're ready.
1099
00:48:52,800 --> 00:48:54,529
Now don't drop it
until you're ready, guys.
1100
00:48:54,640 --> 00:48:55,801
I got it!
1101
00:48:56,000 --> 00:48:57,365
(BLOWING RASPBERRY)
1102
00:48:57,840 --> 00:48:58,966
That's weird.
Ooh!
1103
00:48:59,040 --> 00:49:01,691
The smell of peanuts makes
my weenie cold.
Ooh!
1104
00:49:02,800 --> 00:49:03,847
It shrank mine.
1105
00:49:03,960 --> 00:49:04,961
(CHUCKLING)
1106
00:49:05,440 --> 00:49:06,441
Oh!
1107
00:49:06,680 --> 00:49:07,886
Hey!
1108
00:49:08,040 --> 00:49:09,280
(CHUCKLING)
1109
00:49:10,320 --> 00:49:13,244
Do you believe that?
Did you see what he did?
1110
00:49:14,240 --> 00:49:15,844
It's on!
1111
00:49:16,840 --> 00:49:17,921
Oh, yeah.
1112
00:49:18,040 --> 00:49:19,371
He's going down!
1113
00:49:20,040 --> 00:49:22,611
Right after we finish
playing Funnel Nuts.
1114
00:49:34,880 --> 00:49:36,723
(WHISPERING) Shh. Don't wake him up!
I know.
1115
00:49:40,680 --> 00:49:41,920
How many did you
put in there?
1116
00:49:42,120 --> 00:49:44,122
Just enough to get
a rise out of him.
1117
00:49:44,400 --> 00:49:45,925
(BOTH GIGGLE)
1118
00:49:52,360 --> 00:49:53,566
(SNORING)
1119
00:49:53,680 --> 00:49:55,091
(FIRECRACKERS BURSTING)
1120
00:49:57,640 --> 00:49:58,641
(SCREAMING)
1121
00:50:01,280 --> 00:50:02,725
No! Oh, God!
1122
00:50:03,600 --> 00:50:05,409
No! Oh, my God!
1123
00:50:06,240 --> 00:50:07,446
(SCREAMING)
1124
00:50:12,320 --> 00:50:13,651
(BOTH LAUGHING)
1125
00:50:14,680 --> 00:50:16,011
(GROANING)
1126
00:50:16,760 --> 00:50:17,886
Oh, my God!
1127
00:50:19,280 --> 00:50:21,487
Wait, Lloyd. I think
he might be hurt.
1128
00:50:21,640 --> 00:50:22,926
(GROANING)
1129
00:50:24,560 --> 00:50:27,450
Man, you okay?
It was just a goof.
1130
00:50:27,720 --> 00:50:30,451
Yeah. By the way,
we're even.
1131
00:50:31,440 --> 00:50:34,091
I want them dead, now!
Now! Do you hear me?
1132
00:50:34,600 --> 00:50:35,806
ADELE: (WHISPERING)
Calm down.
1133
00:50:35,960 --> 00:50:37,962
No! No, I can't
take it any longer!
1134
00:50:38,440 --> 00:50:39,965
(EXHALES) If you don't
let me kill them now,
1135
00:50:40,040 --> 00:50:41,405
I am quitting,
and I mean it!
1136
00:50:41,600 --> 00:50:44,171
Okay. Give me
some time to think.
1137
00:50:44,320 --> 00:50:45,446
I'll come up with a plan.
1138
00:50:45,640 --> 00:50:48,644
Plan? You don't need a plan!
These guys are morons!
1139
00:50:48,800 --> 00:50:51,246
Besides, I told you,
my brother's in Special Ops.
1140
00:50:51,440 --> 00:50:52,771
I know how to
get stuff done!
1141
00:50:53,480 --> 00:50:56,848
All right.
But make sure nobody
knows they paid us a visit.
1142
00:50:57,000 --> 00:50:58,684
I don't want this
coming back to us.
1143
00:50:58,840 --> 00:51:00,330
God, shut up!
(BEEPS)
1144
00:51:08,840 --> 00:51:10,285
I wonder what's
in this sucker.
1145
00:51:11,480 --> 00:51:13,005
Whoa, whoa,
whoa, whoa, whoa!
1146
00:51:13,440 --> 00:51:15,329
That thing is worth
a fortune! Be careful!
1147
00:51:15,440 --> 00:51:16,851
Give it to me.
1148
00:51:17,320 --> 00:51:19,607
It would be nice to know
what's in it, though.
1149
00:51:19,800 --> 00:51:21,928
I've been racking
my sack about that.
1150
00:51:22,000 --> 00:51:23,206
I have a theory.
1151
00:51:23,520 --> 00:51:24,681
(CHUCKLES)
Oh, yeah?
1152
00:51:24,800 --> 00:51:27,326
He said it was something
that would help everybody
in the world, right?
1153
00:51:27,520 --> 00:51:28,646
Yeah.
1154
00:51:28,720 --> 00:51:31,121
I think it might be
a baked potato.
1155
00:51:32,320 --> 00:51:34,527
How does a baked potato
help everybody in the world?
1156
00:51:35,840 --> 00:51:38,002
That's the only part
I haven't figured out yet.
1157
00:51:39,000 --> 00:51:40,411
You'll get it, Lloyd.
1158
00:51:40,520 --> 00:51:43,808
We should pick up some sour
cream and chives, just in case.
1159
00:51:44,880 --> 00:51:46,400
Do you guys have any
idea where we are?
1160
00:51:46,560 --> 00:51:47,561
Not really.
1161
00:51:47,640 --> 00:51:50,166
You're the one who told
us to take the shortcut
off the highway.
1162
00:51:50,240 --> 00:51:53,050
Yeah. It's like you wanted to get
us alone, so you could kill us
1163
00:51:53,160 --> 00:51:54,924
and take
the billion-dollar box.
1164
00:51:55,040 --> 00:51:56,849
But what would
be the motive?
(CHUCKLES)
1165
00:51:57,320 --> 00:51:58,367
Yeah. (CHUCKLES)
1166
00:51:59,360 --> 00:52:00,407
Yeah.
1167
00:52:01,360 --> 00:52:02,930
I better get a map
out of the bag, huh?
1168
00:52:03,040 --> 00:52:04,724
Sure.
Okay.
1169
00:52:06,480 --> 00:52:09,290
TRAVIS: So, guys, who else is
helping you look for your daughter?
1170
00:52:09,360 --> 00:52:10,520
HARRY: No one.
LLOYD: Mmm-hmm.
1171
00:52:10,560 --> 00:52:11,561
TRAVIS: Nobody?
1172
00:52:11,680 --> 00:52:14,047
Not even some friends
to lend a hand?
Mmm-mmm.
1173
00:52:14,400 --> 00:52:15,765
Nope, just us.
1174
00:52:15,880 --> 00:52:17,723
What about your wives?
LLOYD: Wives?
1175
00:52:17,840 --> 00:52:19,490
How stupid do we look?
(CHUCKLES)
1176
00:52:21,040 --> 00:52:22,201
Harry?
1177
00:52:22,280 --> 00:52:23,725
Easy.
1178
00:52:25,120 --> 00:52:26,121
(INHALES)
1179
00:52:26,240 --> 00:52:27,241
(SIGHS)
1180
00:52:28,040 --> 00:52:30,168
Close one.
Any girlfriends?
1181
00:52:30,240 --> 00:52:31,571
Been there, done that.
1182
00:52:32,040 --> 00:52:34,805
See, we don't want to be tied
down by anything or anyone.
1183
00:52:34,920 --> 00:52:36,604
We don't even have
social security cards.
1184
00:52:36,720 --> 00:52:38,722
We sold them for 30 bucks
to two Brazilian guys.
1185
00:52:39,240 --> 00:52:40,765
And the good thing
about having no identity
1186
00:52:40,880 --> 00:52:43,326
is that you never have to
worry about identity theft.
1187
00:52:43,400 --> 00:52:45,562
He can't even be
identified by his teeth
1188
00:52:45,800 --> 00:52:47,564
because he's never
even been to a dentist.
1189
00:52:47,960 --> 00:52:50,201
And I've never
joined anything. Ever.
1190
00:52:50,760 --> 00:52:52,285
That's how you
keep a low-pro.
1191
00:52:52,400 --> 00:52:55,244
Yep, there's no actual
proof that we even exist.
1192
00:52:55,920 --> 00:52:58,241
LLOYD: If we died,
no one would
even miss us.
1193
00:52:58,600 --> 00:53:00,728
We are truly blessed.
1194
00:53:01,040 --> 00:53:02,610
(EXPLOSION)
(TIRES SCREECHING)
1195
00:53:05,480 --> 00:53:06,811
(HIGH-PITCHED RINGING)
1196
00:53:07,200 --> 00:53:08,486
(INAUDIBLE)
1197
00:53:16,280 --> 00:53:18,248
(MUFFLED) What the hell
happened, Harry?
1198
00:53:18,760 --> 00:53:19,966
What?
1199
00:53:20,240 --> 00:53:22,527
What the hell happened?
1200
00:53:22,600 --> 00:53:25,285
(LAUGHING) Whoo!
HARRY: I can't hear you!
1201
00:53:25,480 --> 00:53:26,891
So long, boys.
(SCREAMS)
1202
00:53:27,160 --> 00:53:28,286
(INAUDIBLE)
1203
00:53:41,960 --> 00:53:45,203
We may have been involved in
an alien abduction, Harry.
1204
00:53:45,480 --> 00:53:46,891
Is your butt okay?
1205
00:53:46,960 --> 00:53:48,325
(GASPING)
1206
00:53:49,440 --> 00:53:50,646
Harry!
1207
00:53:50,800 --> 00:53:52,211
Holy crap!
1208
00:53:52,280 --> 00:53:53,770
He took off on us!
1209
00:53:54,160 --> 00:53:55,321
What?
1210
00:53:55,640 --> 00:53:59,008
He took off on us.
1211
00:53:59,880 --> 00:54:01,120
What?
1212
00:54:02,280 --> 00:54:05,124
LLOYD: I can't believe that
douchebag stole our hearse.
1213
00:54:05,800 --> 00:54:07,962
I hope something really
bad happens to him.
1214
00:54:08,120 --> 00:54:10,726
No, but I tried
ostrich once.
1215
00:54:11,320 --> 00:54:13,527
Harry, holy cow.
1216
00:54:13,880 --> 00:54:15,291
I'm worried about you.
1217
00:54:15,360 --> 00:54:16,805
You're as deaf as a bat.
1218
00:54:17,280 --> 00:54:19,886
That's not exactly
how it happened, Lloyd.
1219
00:54:20,040 --> 00:54:22,805
Your mother got
into bed with me.
1220
00:54:24,720 --> 00:54:27,200
That's it.
We're getting
you hearing aids.
1221
00:54:31,160 --> 00:54:32,525
RECEPTIONIST:
May I help you?
1222
00:54:33,520 --> 00:54:34,521
Um...
1223
00:54:34,840 --> 00:54:37,923
My friend here would like to
visit his sweet ol' grandma.
1224
00:54:38,640 --> 00:54:39,687
What's the name?
1225
00:54:39,880 --> 00:54:41,041
LLOYD: I'll give you a hint.
1226
00:54:41,560 --> 00:54:43,881
She's the one with
the biggest hearing aids.
1227
00:54:48,760 --> 00:54:51,491
Ms. Snergle,
your grandson
and his friend are here.
1228
00:54:54,360 --> 00:54:55,521
This is stupid, Lloyd!
1229
00:54:55,600 --> 00:54:57,682
I'm not gonna steal
an old lady's hearing aid!
1230
00:54:57,760 --> 00:54:58,807
(SHUSHING)
1231
00:54:58,880 --> 00:55:00,086
Relax!
1232
00:55:00,240 --> 00:55:04,404
We're just looking
for a backup pair.
1233
00:55:04,920 --> 00:55:06,922
There's gotta be
some around here.
1234
00:55:11,840 --> 00:55:13,080
Mikey?
1235
00:55:14,240 --> 00:55:15,571
Yeah, Gran.
1236
00:55:15,720 --> 00:55:16,801
It's Mikey.
1237
00:55:16,880 --> 00:55:19,087
MRS. SNERGLE: Oh, thank
God you're here.
1238
00:55:19,400 --> 00:55:21,209
I've got the diamonds.
1239
00:55:22,040 --> 00:55:23,405
Did she say diamonds?
1240
00:55:23,520 --> 00:55:24,521
(CLICKING TONGUE)
1241
00:55:25,720 --> 00:55:28,246
Go ahead, Granny.
Mikey's listening.
1242
00:55:28,400 --> 00:55:31,563
I want you to take all the
diamonds with you when you go.
1243
00:55:31,760 --> 00:55:34,764
I've been hiding them
from those thieving lawyers.
1244
00:55:34,920 --> 00:55:36,081
That's good.
1245
00:55:36,240 --> 00:55:37,924
Granny did a good thing!
1246
00:55:38,080 --> 00:55:40,208
So, where are the rocks?
1247
00:55:40,440 --> 00:55:42,044
They're underneath me.
1248
00:55:42,120 --> 00:55:43,246
You mean,
under the bed?
1249
00:55:43,400 --> 00:55:45,402
No, under the blanket.
Oh.
1250
00:55:48,680 --> 00:55:49,920
(MOANS)
1251
00:55:51,040 --> 00:55:52,246
I'm not finding anything.
(CHUCKLES)
1252
00:55:52,400 --> 00:55:54,243
Go up more.
1253
00:55:55,720 --> 00:55:57,324
Up here?
Keep going.
1254
00:55:58,880 --> 00:56:00,484
Did you hide them
inside this turkey?
1255
00:56:00,800 --> 00:56:01,961
Yeah, right.
1256
00:56:02,200 --> 00:56:03,964
(INHALES)
Wait.
1257
00:56:04,240 --> 00:56:05,605
There's no diamonds here!
1258
00:56:05,760 --> 00:56:08,331
And you're not
my grandson!
1259
00:56:08,800 --> 00:56:10,290
Harry, she's got me.
1260
00:56:10,920 --> 00:56:12,251
She's really clamping down!
1261
00:56:12,480 --> 00:56:13,481
(GRUNTS)
1262
00:56:13,800 --> 00:56:15,211
Ahhh!
(GASPS)
1263
00:56:15,280 --> 00:56:16,805
(SHUDDERING BREATH)
1264
00:56:17,240 --> 00:56:18,401
Lloyd?
1265
00:56:18,680 --> 00:56:20,762
(GIGGLING) I think that
was her gran-gina.
1266
00:56:20,840 --> 00:56:22,001
That's right!
1267
00:56:22,160 --> 00:56:25,130
So you can cross that one
off your bucket list!
1268
00:56:26,560 --> 00:56:28,324
(BLOWS)
(BOTH COUGHING)
1269
00:56:28,840 --> 00:56:31,969
Hey, Goldfinger!
1270
00:56:32,480 --> 00:56:34,244
Here. (CHUCKLES)
1271
00:56:34,480 --> 00:56:36,482
You've earned them.
(GIGGLING)
1272
00:56:45,520 --> 00:56:47,010
Are you serious?
1273
00:56:47,280 --> 00:56:48,964
Travis is dead?
1274
00:56:49,320 --> 00:56:50,367
LIPPINCOTT: That's right.
1275
00:56:50,480 --> 00:56:52,400
The Kansas state police
informed me this morning.
1276
00:56:52,480 --> 00:56:54,164
I thought
you'd want to know.
(SIGHS)
1277
00:56:55,320 --> 00:56:57,846
Thank you,
Captain Lippincott.
1278
00:56:58,200 --> 00:57:01,363
I know it's never easy to
relay this kind of sad news.
1279
00:57:01,720 --> 00:57:03,768
But I want you to know
that your brother, Travis,
1280
00:57:03,840 --> 00:57:05,683
was more than just
a handyman to us.
1281
00:57:05,840 --> 00:57:07,001
He was
1282
00:57:07,680 --> 00:57:08,966
family.
(CHUCKLES)
1283
00:57:09,520 --> 00:57:10,646
LIPPINCOTT: Really?
1284
00:57:11,120 --> 00:57:14,363
Do you suck the toe jam
off Mommy and Daddy, too?
1285
00:57:15,480 --> 00:57:17,642
Um, I beg your pardon?
1286
00:57:18,360 --> 00:57:20,089
My brother
told me everything.
1287
00:57:20,560 --> 00:57:21,561
(GASPS)
1288
00:57:23,800 --> 00:57:25,320
I don't know what
you're talking about.
1289
00:57:25,400 --> 00:57:27,767
Look, lady, I know you're
terminating your husband.
1290
00:57:27,880 --> 00:57:29,928
I'm the one who supplied
you with the untraceables.
1291
00:57:30,240 --> 00:57:31,810
Remember? I also know
1292
00:57:31,880 --> 00:57:34,531
that my brother was supposed
to eliminate those two idiots,
1293
00:57:34,880 --> 00:57:37,008
but somehow they
turned the tables on him.
1294
00:57:38,160 --> 00:57:39,366
Relax.
1295
00:57:39,560 --> 00:57:40,891
I'm not here
to turn you in.
1296
00:57:41,760 --> 00:57:43,171
I'm here to
help you out.
1297
00:57:48,520 --> 00:57:49,760
So how are those
things working?
1298
00:57:49,880 --> 00:57:51,689
Not bad.
I can hear you a little.
1299
00:57:51,840 --> 00:57:53,046
Here, let me
turn them up.
1300
00:57:56,880 --> 00:57:58,928
Honey, would you
like some pancakes?
1301
00:57:59,560 --> 00:58:00,891
Yeah, I'd love
some pancakes.
1302
00:58:01,080 --> 00:58:02,127
What?
(SCREAMS)
1303
00:58:03,440 --> 00:58:05,568
Stop yelling! (GROANS)
I'm not yelling.
1304
00:58:05,840 --> 00:58:07,285
Why would you say
I'm yelling?
1305
00:58:07,440 --> 00:58:09,090
(YELLING)
This is yelling!
1306
00:58:09,560 --> 00:58:11,164
(GROANING)
1307
00:58:12,400 --> 00:58:13,606
Harry!
1308
00:58:15,560 --> 00:58:17,801
I think I might have
turned them up too high!
1309
00:58:19,240 --> 00:58:21,811
Oh, look!
Barbara Hershey Highway.
(CHUCKLES)
1310
00:58:23,800 --> 00:58:24,961
Wait a minute.
1311
00:58:25,920 --> 00:58:27,968
I think I know
where we are.
1312
00:58:28,280 --> 00:58:29,611
Follow me.
1313
00:58:37,080 --> 00:58:38,809
Are you sure
about this, Lloyd?
1314
00:58:38,960 --> 00:58:42,760
Positive. The kid
worked at the hockey rink
just past the museum.
1315
00:58:44,600 --> 00:58:45,806
Come on, Harry!
1316
00:58:47,440 --> 00:58:49,329
He drove a Zamboni!
1317
00:58:53,600 --> 00:58:55,284
(BOTH GASP)
1318
00:58:58,120 --> 00:59:01,249
Oh, my God.
I never thought
I'd see her again.
1319
00:59:01,960 --> 00:59:03,849
I don't know if
I told you this, Har,
1320
00:59:04,440 --> 00:59:07,000
but that kid kinda porked me when
I traded him for the mini bike.
1321
00:59:07,640 --> 00:59:10,120
And he only gave me
a quarter-tank of gas.
1322
00:59:12,680 --> 00:59:14,489
Are you thinking
what I'm thinking?
1323
00:59:15,080 --> 00:59:16,366
(TIRES SQUEAL)
1324
00:59:25,960 --> 00:59:27,291
(BRAKES SCREECH)
1325
00:59:28,480 --> 00:59:29,686
(BREATHING HEAVILY)
1326
00:59:36,640 --> 00:59:38,324
(HORN HONKING)
1327
00:59:40,480 --> 00:59:41,720
Yeah!
1328
00:59:43,280 --> 00:59:44,691
(HORN HONKING)
1329
00:59:55,760 --> 00:59:57,046
(SNORING)
1330
00:59:58,720 --> 00:59:59,846
Bush club!
1331
00:59:59,880 --> 01:00:02,531
Bush club! Bush club!
Bush club!
(GROANING)
1332
01:00:02,600 --> 01:00:03,806
(LAUGHING)
1333
01:00:16,080 --> 01:00:17,650
I feel really good, Har.
1334
01:00:17,720 --> 01:00:18,846
Me, too!
1335
01:00:18,920 --> 01:00:20,365
Really good!
1336
01:00:20,720 --> 01:00:22,848
You might want to
step on it, Har!
1337
01:00:23,440 --> 01:00:24,885
(PANTING)
1338
01:00:25,040 --> 01:00:26,280
(GRUNTING)
1339
01:00:28,560 --> 01:00:29,971
(HORN HONKING)
1340
01:00:41,720 --> 01:00:43,210
(HORN HONKING)
1341
01:00:49,520 --> 01:00:51,090
Wow, look at
all the brains.
1342
01:00:51,240 --> 01:00:53,242
(SING SONG) They're
blinding me with science!
1343
01:00:53,400 --> 01:00:55,760
Okay, Lloyd. I'm gonna find out
what time this thing starts.
1344
01:00:55,920 --> 01:00:57,126
You keep an eye
out for Penny.
1345
01:00:57,240 --> 01:00:58,401
Roger that.
1346
01:00:58,960 --> 01:01:01,770
Ladies and gentlemen,
this is an AMBER Alert.
1347
01:01:01,920 --> 01:01:05,811
Has anybody seen this
lovely, delicate angel?
1348
01:01:05,960 --> 01:01:08,406
Have you seen her?
Lovely and delicate.
1349
01:01:08,600 --> 01:01:10,284
This girl is slammin'.
1350
01:01:11,880 --> 01:01:13,370
Oh, yeah, sure,
I know her.
1351
01:01:13,480 --> 01:01:14,561
I got a hit.
1352
01:01:14,640 --> 01:01:15,687
It's, uh,
Penny Pinchelow.
1353
01:01:15,760 --> 01:01:16,960
I met her at
the bar yesterday.
1354
01:01:17,040 --> 01:01:18,160
What's that
supposed to mean?
1355
01:01:18,200 --> 01:01:19,929
Whoa! Easy, hoser!
1356
01:01:20,000 --> 01:01:21,047
We just hung out a little.
1357
01:01:21,600 --> 01:01:22,761
Oh.
1358
01:01:24,080 --> 01:01:25,840
Do you happen to know
where she is right now?
1359
01:01:26,160 --> 01:01:28,561
Yeah, my, uh, friends
just went to meet her
at her hotel room.
1360
01:01:28,720 --> 01:01:29,687
They're walking
her over here.
1361
01:01:29,760 --> 01:01:30,920
She's giving
a speech tonight.
1362
01:01:31,120 --> 01:01:32,201
When you see her,
1363
01:01:32,280 --> 01:01:34,442
tell her that Lloyd and her
dad are looking for her.
1364
01:01:34,600 --> 01:01:36,807
And get her to
call me on this.
1365
01:01:38,320 --> 01:01:39,446
LLOYD: There you are!
1366
01:01:41,000 --> 01:01:42,360
I've been looking
all over for you.
1367
01:01:42,920 --> 01:01:44,046
Cool!
1368
01:01:44,120 --> 01:01:45,963
I just ran into a Mexican
guy who knows Penny.
1369
01:01:46,040 --> 01:01:47,087
He said she's on her way!
1370
01:01:47,280 --> 01:01:48,611
Come on,
let's get in line.
1371
01:01:48,680 --> 01:01:50,170
(SOFTLY) Dressed like this?
1372
01:01:50,400 --> 01:01:52,767
Harry, people who come to
these things are smart.
1373
01:01:53,600 --> 01:01:55,807
We can't go in there looking
like a couple of goofballs.
1374
01:01:56,000 --> 01:01:58,401
Oh, yeah. Let's go buy
some smart stuff.
1375
01:02:17,040 --> 01:02:18,246
How's your day?
1376
01:02:18,920 --> 01:02:20,331
Living the dream.
1377
01:02:24,040 --> 01:02:27,840
Ooh, that mac and
cheese looks good!
1378
01:02:31,680 --> 01:02:34,968
Um, I think I'm gonna
need some chopsticks
1379
01:02:35,040 --> 01:02:37,850
or a really,
really skinny fork.
1380
01:02:38,160 --> 01:02:39,685
You got it.
1381
01:02:40,000 --> 01:02:41,286
(KNOCK ON DOOR)
1382
01:02:41,400 --> 01:02:42,606
It's open!
1383
01:02:42,920 --> 01:02:44,046
Hey, Penny!
1384
01:02:44,160 --> 01:02:46,288
Hey, Tom!
Hey, Gus!
1385
01:02:46,360 --> 01:02:48,522
Hey, uh,
Penny. Um...
1386
01:02:49,040 --> 01:02:50,320
What are you doing
in your undies
1387
01:02:50,360 --> 01:02:52,727
in front of the room
service guy here, eh?
(BOTH CHUCKLE)
1388
01:02:52,880 --> 01:02:53,961
You don't know him.
1389
01:02:54,080 --> 01:02:57,163
Oh, no. Someone told me
this great trick about
how not to get nervous
1390
01:02:57,240 --> 01:02:58,605
when you're
giving a speech.
1391
01:02:58,760 --> 01:03:01,047
All you do is imagine that
you're in your underwear.
1392
01:03:01,360 --> 01:03:03,522
So I've been practicing
all afternoon.
1393
01:03:03,680 --> 01:03:05,091
Will there be
anything else, ma'am?
1394
01:03:05,200 --> 01:03:07,089
Oh, no.
Just that skinny fork.
1395
01:03:07,520 --> 01:03:08,601
Right.
1396
01:03:08,960 --> 01:03:10,371
Okay. Burning daylight.
1397
01:03:10,440 --> 01:03:12,966
Yeah. Oh! Great news. Your dad
showed up for the conference.
1398
01:03:13,400 --> 01:03:15,607
(GASPS) What?
Yeah, Gordy just called us.
1399
01:03:15,720 --> 01:03:18,007
He ran into some guy named Lloyd
who was with your father.
1400
01:03:18,080 --> 01:03:20,731
They were looking for them out
front of the convention hall.
1401
01:03:25,960 --> 01:03:27,883
BARBARA:
Oh, my goodness.
1402
01:03:28,400 --> 01:03:30,448
Are you absolutely certain?
1403
01:03:31,240 --> 01:03:32,765
And there's no way
you're mistaken?
1404
01:03:33,720 --> 01:03:35,802
All right, um, yes,
then I'll have someone
1405
01:03:35,880 --> 01:03:37,245
meet him at the
door in a hurry.
1406
01:03:37,320 --> 01:03:39,129
(CHUCKLES)
Yes, okay. Goodbye.
1407
01:03:39,240 --> 01:03:40,446
What is it?
1408
01:03:40,560 --> 01:03:42,164
Dr. Pinchelow is coming.
1409
01:03:42,240 --> 01:03:44,846
What? Are you certain?
I thought he was sick!
1410
01:03:44,920 --> 01:03:46,081
Apparently he's better.
1411
01:03:46,160 --> 01:03:47,605
I just spoke with his
daughter, Penny,
on the phone
1412
01:03:47,760 --> 01:03:49,125
and she's headed right
over here to meet him.
1413
01:03:49,240 --> 01:03:51,400
Oh, the man didn't even show
up for his Nobel ceremony.
1414
01:03:51,440 --> 01:03:54,284
He showed up for us.
Go find him.
1415
01:03:54,600 --> 01:03:55,965
Uh, yeah, yeah,
I'm on it.
1416
01:04:02,840 --> 01:04:03,921
Lloyd, look!
1417
01:04:04,400 --> 01:04:05,765
Penny is speaking soon.
1418
01:04:06,800 --> 01:04:08,689
That's so hot.
(CHUCKLES)
1419
01:04:18,280 --> 01:04:20,965
ADELE: Is it done?
(SIGHS) No.
1420
01:04:21,280 --> 01:04:23,806
Some Canadian douchebags barged
in before I could finish her.
1421
01:04:25,960 --> 01:04:27,121
Okay-
1422
01:04:27,200 --> 01:04:30,807
You follow Penny, and the next
chance you get, kill her.
1423
01:04:30,960 --> 01:04:32,689
I'll take out the guys,
get the box.
1424
01:04:33,040 --> 01:04:34,929
What if they have already
gone into the KEN conference?
1425
01:04:35,000 --> 01:04:36,161
Not a chance.
1426
01:04:36,280 --> 01:04:39,409
The event's been sold
out for over a year,
and the security is insane.
1427
01:04:39,520 --> 01:04:40,806
Tickets, please.
1428
01:04:41,040 --> 01:04:42,451
No, thank you.
1429
01:04:42,520 --> 01:04:44,284
We're not much
for boring speeches.
1430
01:04:44,480 --> 01:04:47,211
We just have to make sure that
his daughter gets this box.
1431
01:04:47,480 --> 01:04:50,689
No tickie, no entry.
No exceptions.
1432
01:04:52,800 --> 01:04:54,325
BARBARA: Have you found
Dr. Pinchelow yet?
1433
01:04:54,400 --> 01:04:56,402
No. I don't even know
what he looks like.
1434
01:04:56,560 --> 01:04:57,561
This is ridiculous.
1435
01:04:57,640 --> 01:04:59,369
How am I supposed to find
the man in this throng
1436
01:04:59,480 --> 01:05:02,245
when all I know about him is
that he wears hearing aids?
1437
01:05:02,400 --> 01:05:05,324
Great. It's sold out.
I'm dead.
1438
01:05:06,480 --> 01:05:08,209
So much for
higher education.
1439
01:05:08,640 --> 01:05:09,926
(GROANS)
1440
01:05:11,320 --> 01:05:12,401
Relax, Har.
1441
01:05:12,480 --> 01:05:15,563
We're gonna find her.
Don't get that dying
kidney all worked up.
1442
01:05:15,680 --> 01:05:17,091
Oh, it's not the kidney.
1443
01:05:17,160 --> 01:05:18,605
I think I gotta
pinch a loaf.
1444
01:05:18,840 --> 01:05:21,571
Pinchelow?
Did someone
say Pinchelow?
1445
01:05:21,840 --> 01:05:23,683
Oh, my goodness,
it is you!
1446
01:05:23,840 --> 01:05:26,207
You're really here!
I'm Dr. Meldmann.
1447
01:05:26,320 --> 01:05:27,606
How was your trip
from Maryland?
1448
01:05:27,880 --> 01:05:28,927
Not so great.
1449
01:05:29,000 --> 01:05:31,401
Somebody stole our car and he
finger-bombed an old lady.
1450
01:05:31,480 --> 01:05:32,720
(CHUCKLES)
1451
01:05:33,360 --> 01:05:34,441
Sounds terrible.
1452
01:05:34,520 --> 01:05:36,204
We'll take really good care
of you now that you're here.
1453
01:05:36,280 --> 01:05:37,611
Uh, would you like
to go into the foyer
1454
01:05:37,680 --> 01:05:39,320
for the cocktail reception,
Dr. Pinchelow?
1455
01:05:39,760 --> 01:05:41,444
Oh. Yes, Dr. Pinchelow
would love to go
1456
01:05:41,520 --> 01:05:43,284
to the foyer for
the cocktail reception.
1457
01:05:43,440 --> 01:05:45,363
Yeah, cool.
Let's get ripped.
1458
01:05:46,760 --> 01:05:48,922
(CLEARS THROAT)
Uh, this way, please.
1459
01:05:49,520 --> 01:05:51,204
I'm sorry, your name is?
1460
01:05:51,400 --> 01:05:53,209
I'm his associate,
Dr. Christmas.
1461
01:05:53,280 --> 01:05:54,884
Ah, Christmas
like the holiday?
1462
01:05:54,960 --> 01:05:56,883
No. (CHUCKLES)
Like the tree.
1463
01:05:57,360 --> 01:05:58,361
(DR. MELDMANN CHUCKLES)
1464
01:05:58,720 --> 01:06:00,000
May I ask you
a question, Doctor,
1465
01:06:00,040 --> 01:06:01,485
and I don't mean
to be insensitive,
1466
01:06:01,600 --> 01:06:04,490
but, uh, does Dr. Pinchelow
have Asperger's?
1467
01:06:04,640 --> 01:06:05,880
Probably.
1468
01:06:06,040 --> 01:06:08,202
I know he doesn't
wipe real well.
1469
01:06:12,480 --> 01:06:14,369
Why don't you gentlemen
make yourselves at home.
1470
01:06:14,440 --> 01:06:16,841
I'm gonna go fetch the, uh,
director of the conference,
1471
01:06:16,920 --> 01:06:18,331
Dr. Barbara Walcott.
1472
01:06:18,400 --> 01:06:20,084
She can't
wait to meet you.
1473
01:06:20,160 --> 01:06:22,970
Dr. Barbara?
A lady doctor?
Seriously?
1474
01:06:23,560 --> 01:06:25,722
Lady doctor, that
always cracks me up.
1475
01:06:25,800 --> 01:06:27,802
Yeah, doctor of doing
the laundry, maybe.
1476
01:06:27,920 --> 01:06:28,921
Am I right?
1477
01:06:29,040 --> 01:06:30,246
(BOTH SNICKERING)
1478
01:06:30,960 --> 01:06:32,166
I'll be right back.
1479
01:06:33,920 --> 01:06:35,285
What were you
thinking, Lloyd?
1480
01:06:35,360 --> 01:06:36,725
Now he thinks
we're doctors.
1481
01:06:36,800 --> 01:06:38,404
At least we're
in the door.
1482
01:06:38,560 --> 01:06:40,483
Now all we gotta do
is act intelligent.
We'll fit right in.
1483
01:06:40,600 --> 01:06:41,601
Okay-
1484
01:06:41,680 --> 01:06:43,091
(MUSIC PLAYING)
1485
01:06:44,400 --> 01:06:45,765
Hi, barkeep.
1486
01:06:45,920 --> 01:06:47,445
How much for a beer?
It's gratis.
1487
01:06:48,200 --> 01:06:49,326
Ooh.
1488
01:06:49,480 --> 01:06:50,845
That sounds expensive.
1489
01:06:51,760 --> 01:06:53,364
Can you give
us a moment?
1490
01:06:54,120 --> 01:06:56,248
Lloyd, we blew our money
on the graduation robes.
1491
01:06:56,320 --> 01:06:57,481
Maybe we shouldn't drink.
1492
01:06:57,600 --> 01:06:59,364
No way.
I need booze, man.
1493
01:06:59,600 --> 01:07:01,045
If I meet your daughter
without a buzz on,
1494
01:07:01,160 --> 01:07:02,321
she'll think
I'm an idiot.
1495
01:07:02,400 --> 01:07:03,401
(HUFFS)
1496
01:07:04,760 --> 01:07:06,046
LLOYD: Hey,
wait a minute!
1497
01:07:06,680 --> 01:07:09,047
What about
the old Stinkeroo?
1498
01:07:09,280 --> 01:07:11,203
(SIGHS) Yeah, I'm in.
(CHUCKLES)
1499
01:07:23,240 --> 01:07:24,651
(SCRATCHING)
1500
01:07:29,360 --> 01:07:30,566
(EXHALES)
1501
01:07:30,640 --> 01:07:32,369
Excuse me, ma'am.
Yes?
1502
01:07:32,480 --> 01:07:33,641
This beer smells funky.
1503
01:07:33,720 --> 01:07:35,006
Can I have
a new one, please?
1504
01:07:35,640 --> 01:07:36,721
What do you mean "funky"?
1505
01:07:37,400 --> 01:07:38,606
Go ahead, take a sniff.
1506
01:07:38,680 --> 01:07:39,966
(SNIFFS) Ew!
1507
01:07:42,720 --> 01:07:43,801
I'll get you a freshie.
1508
01:07:43,880 --> 01:07:45,530
Mine is stinky, too.
1509
01:07:50,760 --> 01:07:52,125
(GAGGING)
1510
01:07:52,680 --> 01:07:54,569
Yours smells even worse!
1511
01:07:54,680 --> 01:07:56,842
(CHUCKLES)
I'll be right back.
1512
01:07:57,480 --> 01:07:59,050
"Yours smells even worse."
1513
01:07:59,160 --> 01:08:00,321
Thanks!
(BOTH CHUCKLING)
1514
01:08:00,520 --> 01:08:01,885
You're really good
at that, Lloyd.
1515
01:08:02,320 --> 01:08:03,526
I learned from the best.
1516
01:08:04,000 --> 01:08:05,331
Thanks, Mom.
1517
01:08:05,760 --> 01:08:07,524
I can't wait to see
what's in this.
1518
01:08:07,840 --> 01:08:09,922
Yeah. Hey, Har?
Mmm?
1519
01:08:10,080 --> 01:08:11,161
Do you know how long
you have to wait
1520
01:08:11,240 --> 01:08:13,242
after kidney surgery
to have sex?
1521
01:08:13,320 --> 01:08:15,004
I don't think I'll
have to wait too long.
1522
01:08:15,160 --> 01:08:17,447
No, not you.
I meant the donor chick.
1523
01:08:18,400 --> 01:08:20,562
What are you talking about?
Okay! Fine!
1524
01:08:20,680 --> 01:08:21,920
Let's just drop it!
1525
01:08:22,000 --> 01:08:23,411
Here you go,
doctors.
1526
01:08:23,680 --> 01:08:24,841
Fresh beers.
1527
01:08:25,000 --> 01:08:28,686
And I also brought you some
hydroponically grown goji berries
1528
01:08:28,760 --> 01:08:30,205
with vegan barbecue sauce
1529
01:08:30,280 --> 01:08:32,567
and some organic
pumpkin chips. Enjoy.
1530
01:08:32,680 --> 01:08:34,091
Why, thank you!
Mmm.
1531
01:08:35,960 --> 01:08:37,291
BOTH: Mmm.
1532
01:08:39,200 --> 01:08:40,201
Mmm.
1533
01:08:40,400 --> 01:08:42,129
These are salty.
Mmm-hmm.
1534
01:08:42,240 --> 01:08:43,446
Try these.
1535
01:08:46,720 --> 01:08:47,881
Mmm.
1536
01:08:48,240 --> 01:08:49,765
Yours are super tangy.
1537
01:08:50,560 --> 01:08:52,050
I like it a lot.
1538
01:08:53,040 --> 01:08:54,246
DR. MELDMANN: Gentlemen.
1539
01:08:54,400 --> 01:08:55,811
I'd like you to meet the
director of the conference,
1540
01:08:55,880 --> 01:08:56,961
Dr. Barbara Walcott.
1541
01:08:57,040 --> 01:08:58,963
And, Barbara,
this is Dr. Pinchelow
1542
01:08:59,120 --> 01:09:01,282
and his associate,
Dr. Christmas.
1543
01:09:01,440 --> 01:09:04,887
Wonderful. It is a high
honor to meet you both.
1544
01:09:04,960 --> 01:09:07,440
Wow. Great accent, doc.
Where you from?
1545
01:09:07,560 --> 01:09:08,891
England. Surrey.
1546
01:09:09,120 --> 01:09:11,521
Oh, no need to apologize.
That was years ago.
1547
01:09:11,600 --> 01:09:13,568
We kicked your butt anyway,
so we're cool with it.
1548
01:09:14,240 --> 01:09:15,605
(BOTH LAUGH)
1549
01:09:16,240 --> 01:09:17,446
(LAUGHS)
1550
01:09:17,640 --> 01:09:18,920
BARBARA: Oh,
you're a leg-puller!
1551
01:09:18,960 --> 01:09:21,486
(CHUCKLES) Let's get you
both to your seats.
1552
01:09:21,560 --> 01:09:23,927
Professor Garabedian's
KEN talk is about to begin.
1553
01:09:24,080 --> 01:09:28,005
Now, the existence of dark
matter is largely inferred
1554
01:09:28,080 --> 01:09:31,323
from the gravitational
effect on visible matter
1555
01:09:31,760 --> 01:09:35,446
and the gravitational lensing
of background radiation.
1556
01:09:35,600 --> 01:09:37,602
We saved two seats for you at
the end of the second row.
1557
01:09:37,680 --> 01:09:38,681
Just there.
1558
01:09:40,600 --> 01:09:44,207
...because they were trying to
figure out the discrepancies...
1559
01:09:44,280 --> 01:09:45,566
You could actually
go in the front.
1560
01:09:45,640 --> 01:09:47,369
HARRY: Coming through.
LLOYD: My bad!
1561
01:09:47,600 --> 01:09:48,965
Here we go. Oops!
1562
01:09:49,120 --> 01:09:50,929
Wow. Is that silk?
1563
01:09:51,080 --> 01:09:52,366
(LAUGHS)
1564
01:09:53,480 --> 01:09:54,686
That sucks!
1565
01:09:55,320 --> 01:09:57,129
That's good. Sorry.
1566
01:09:57,680 --> 01:09:58,886
Watch my knee.
1567
01:09:58,960 --> 01:10:00,450
We make a better door
than a window, don't we?
1568
01:10:00,560 --> 01:10:01,561
(TALKING)
1569
01:10:01,680 --> 01:10:03,603
LLOYD: I hope this isn't
your favorite part.
1570
01:10:04,000 --> 01:10:05,843
HARRY: There are a couple
of hotties over here.
1571
01:10:05,960 --> 01:10:07,371
I got it! (YELLING)
Oh!
1572
01:10:07,880 --> 01:10:09,006
(CHUCKLES)
1573
01:10:09,280 --> 01:10:10,964
That was easy!
1574
01:10:11,720 --> 01:10:14,530
That Dr. Pinchelow is certainly
a fascinating character.
1575
01:10:14,680 --> 01:10:16,808
Of course he is.
He's a genius.
1576
01:10:17,120 --> 01:10:21,523
Indeed, the Large Hadron
Collider has already shown us
1577
01:10:21,680 --> 01:10:23,648
that dark matter
is likely...
1578
01:10:23,800 --> 01:10:25,325
Especially when
you eat prunes!
1579
01:10:25,400 --> 01:10:26,686
(FARTING NOISES)
(CHUCKLES)
1580
01:10:27,160 --> 01:10:28,207
Yes. (CHUCKLES)
1581
01:10:28,800 --> 01:10:31,007
(STAMMERING) That dark
matter is likely...
1582
01:10:31,560 --> 01:10:32,971
(FARTING NOISES)
(CHUCKLES)
1583
01:10:34,240 --> 01:10:36,561
...the missing piece
of the puzzle
1584
01:10:36,720 --> 01:10:40,327
that physicists have been
searching for, for years.
1585
01:10:40,880 --> 01:10:43,247
BOTH: (CHANTING) Nerd!
1586
01:10:43,320 --> 01:10:45,209
Nerd! Nerd! Nerd!
(CROWD MUMBLING)
1587
01:10:45,320 --> 01:10:48,563
Nerd! Nerd! Nerd!
1588
01:10:48,680 --> 01:10:51,001
Excuse me, gentlemen.
1589
01:10:51,400 --> 01:10:52,765
Holy crap!
1590
01:10:52,840 --> 01:10:54,200
(CHUCKLING)
Did that come from you?
1591
01:10:54,240 --> 01:10:57,722
Dr. Garabedian is a
world-renowned astrophysicist
1592
01:10:58,040 --> 01:11:00,725
and many of us are interested
in hearing his findings.
1593
01:11:01,080 --> 01:11:03,367
I'm reading his mind. Mmm-hmm.
I'm picking it up, too.
1594
01:11:04,520 --> 01:11:06,249
Who is that?
1595
01:11:06,400 --> 01:11:08,004
(WHISPERING)
It's Dr. Pinchelow!
1596
01:11:09,680 --> 01:11:10,886
Bernard Pinchelow?
1597
01:11:12,280 --> 01:11:14,362
AUTOMATED VOICE:
Dark matter is not a joke.
(SQUEAKS)
1598
01:11:15,040 --> 01:11:17,771
Your antics are proving
to be disruptive.
1599
01:11:17,840 --> 01:11:20,366
Thank you, Dr. Dilbeck,
1600
01:11:21,680 --> 01:11:22,966
but Dr. Pinchelow is right.
1601
01:11:23,720 --> 01:11:26,405
My dark matter data was insufficient.
(CROWD MURMURING)
1602
01:11:27,200 --> 01:11:28,247
What the fuck?
1603
01:11:29,560 --> 01:11:31,369
My methods were sloppy.
1604
01:11:32,880 --> 01:11:34,405
I'm a hack.
(CROWD GASPS)
1605
01:11:35,560 --> 01:11:37,403
(SOBBING)
I'm really sorry.
1606
01:11:41,080 --> 01:11:42,241
See?
1607
01:11:42,480 --> 01:11:44,050
Eat me.
Suck it!
1608
01:11:44,440 --> 01:11:46,647
You wish.
Lloyd. Lloyd.
1609
01:11:46,720 --> 01:11:49,041
Thank you,
Professor Garabedian.
1610
01:11:49,600 --> 01:11:51,409
That's what the KEN
Conference is all about.
1611
01:11:51,880 --> 01:11:52,927
Truth.
1612
01:11:53,040 --> 01:11:55,088
But I will ask that
everyone please behave
1613
01:11:55,160 --> 01:11:56,730
in a professional
and dignified...
1614
01:11:56,920 --> 01:11:58,570
BOTH: Show us your tits!
1615
01:11:58,640 --> 01:11:59,641
(CROWD GASPS)
1616
01:11:59,760 --> 01:12:01,520
HARRY: Both Of them!
LLOYD: (CHUCKLING) Yeah!
1617
01:12:02,600 --> 01:12:04,967
We're just gonna take a short
two-minute break. Thank you!
1618
01:12:05,680 --> 01:12:06,886
(CHUCKLING)
1619
01:12:06,960 --> 01:12:08,086
Man.
1620
01:12:08,160 --> 01:12:09,366
Hey, this is great!
1621
01:12:09,440 --> 01:12:11,681
We're learning so much
about dark matter.
1622
01:12:11,760 --> 01:12:13,125
(FARTING NOISE)
(LAUGHING)
1623
01:12:13,760 --> 01:12:14,807
Yes, indeed.
1624
01:12:14,920 --> 01:12:16,046
Uh, I'm sorry,
Dr. Pinchelow,
1625
01:12:16,120 --> 01:12:19,124
but we can't seem to find Dr.
Christmas on the roster.
1626
01:12:19,240 --> 01:12:20,924
Oh, that's okay.
He's with me.
1627
01:12:21,240 --> 01:12:25,165
Due to security concerns everyone
must be on the list to get in.
1628
01:12:25,600 --> 01:12:27,125
It's all right, Doctor.
1629
01:12:28,080 --> 01:12:30,287
I think I know a shakedown
when I see one.
1630
01:12:30,480 --> 01:12:31,641
I'll tell you what.
1631
01:12:31,760 --> 01:12:35,128
I'm gonna write an IOU
and I'm gonna leave it blank.
1632
01:12:35,640 --> 01:12:36,766
Anybody have a pen?
1633
01:12:36,840 --> 01:12:39,446
There are no exceptions.
1634
01:12:39,840 --> 01:12:41,080
Really?
1635
01:12:41,160 --> 01:12:42,366
I'll tell you what, warden.
1636
01:12:42,680 --> 01:12:43,966
If I'm leaving,
1637
01:12:44,120 --> 01:12:46,487
then my steamed colleague
is leaving with me.
1638
01:12:46,600 --> 01:12:47,840
No, he's not.
1639
01:12:49,960 --> 01:12:51,121
Quick conference.
1640
01:12:54,640 --> 01:12:56,130
(WHISPERING)
What are you doing, Har?
1641
01:12:56,360 --> 01:12:58,601
You're killing me!
Lloyd, I can't leave.
1642
01:12:58,680 --> 01:13:01,570
Penny is gonna be speaking soon.
I wanna meet her!
1643
01:13:01,640 --> 01:13:02,721
What?
1644
01:13:02,800 --> 01:13:04,484
How come you get to
meet her before I do?
1645
01:13:05,520 --> 01:13:07,602
Lloyd, this is about me.
1646
01:13:07,680 --> 01:13:09,170
Me, my daughter
and my kidney.
1647
01:13:09,320 --> 01:13:10,810
That's why we're
here, remember?
1648
01:13:11,120 --> 01:13:12,849
How can I forget? It's
all you ever talk about.
1649
01:13:12,960 --> 01:13:14,450
Penny and my kidney.
My kidney and Penny.
1650
01:13:14,520 --> 01:13:16,680
To tell you the truth, I'm
getting a little sick of it.
1651
01:13:16,960 --> 01:13:18,086
Wait a minute.
1652
01:13:18,160 --> 01:13:19,844
I know what
you're up to, mister.
1653
01:13:20,280 --> 01:13:21,281
(CHUCKLING)
1654
01:13:21,360 --> 01:13:23,761
You wanna stay because
you're hot for my daughter!
1655
01:13:23,840 --> 01:13:26,241
What?
Am I right?
1656
01:13:26,320 --> 01:13:27,731
That's insane!
1657
01:13:27,840 --> 01:13:28,921
Don't deny it, Lloyd!
1658
01:13:29,000 --> 01:13:30,365
You have been
drooling over her
1659
01:13:30,440 --> 01:13:32,408
ever since you
first saw her picture.
1660
01:13:32,480 --> 01:13:33,561
So what?
1661
01:13:33,640 --> 01:13:36,166
I'm not gonna apologize for letting
nature take its course, Har.
1662
01:13:36,320 --> 01:13:38,448
I hate to burst
your butthole, mister.
1663
01:13:38,520 --> 01:13:39,681
It ain't gonna happen.
1664
01:13:39,840 --> 01:13:42,047
It's my job to
protect my daughter.
1665
01:13:42,160 --> 01:13:43,207
Protect her?
1666
01:13:43,680 --> 01:13:45,011
(CHUCKLING)
Look who's talking!
1667
01:13:45,200 --> 01:13:47,009
You're trying to swindle
her out of a kidney!
1668
01:13:47,160 --> 01:13:48,685
At least I'm gonna
marry her.
1669
01:13:50,720 --> 01:13:51,801
Marry her? No.
1670
01:13:51,880 --> 01:13:53,769
You're not gonna marry.
Why not?
1671
01:13:53,840 --> 01:13:56,605
No! Lloyd, you are not going
to marry my daughter.
1672
01:13:56,840 --> 01:13:59,571
Why? Because she's a tick younger than me?
Get over it.
1673
01:13:59,720 --> 01:14:00,881
Age is just a letter, man.
1674
01:14:01,040 --> 01:14:04,249
It's got nothing
to do with age!
It's got to do...
1675
01:14:05,600 --> 01:14:06,726
With what?
1676
01:14:10,680 --> 01:14:12,205
I'm her father, Lloyd,
1677
01:14:14,800 --> 01:14:16,131
and, frankly,
1678
01:14:19,040 --> 01:14:20,565
I think she can do better.
1679
01:14:22,320 --> 01:14:23,526
Oh...
1680
01:14:27,800 --> 01:14:29,211
Okay-
1681
01:14:34,000 --> 01:14:35,490
(GAGGING)
1682
01:14:40,240 --> 01:14:41,401
(CLICKING TONGUE)
1683
01:14:41,480 --> 01:14:43,448
Time to go, Doctor.
All right, buddy.
1684
01:14:43,920 --> 01:14:45,410
(WHIMPERING) Harry?
GUARD: Let's go.
1685
01:14:48,080 --> 01:14:49,241
LLOYD: Harry?
1686
01:14:51,720 --> 01:14:52,801
Harry?
1687
01:14:55,640 --> 01:14:57,961
Dr. Walcott just
had a wonderful idea.
1688
01:14:58,080 --> 01:14:59,161
How would you like
to come with us
1689
01:14:59,240 --> 01:15:01,242
and judge the Young
Inventors competition?
1690
01:15:03,840 --> 01:15:05,683
Yeah, cool.
Let's judge shit.
1691
01:15:06,320 --> 01:15:07,970
Hey! Hey!
1692
01:15:15,520 --> 01:15:17,602
So this is what
rock bottom feels like.
1693
01:15:19,520 --> 01:15:21,761
Mmm, not that bad.
(CHUCKLES)
1694
01:15:21,920 --> 01:15:23,684
(CELL PHONE RINGING)
1695
01:15:25,880 --> 01:15:26,927
(GASPS)
1696
01:15:27,360 --> 01:15:28,521
Hello?
1697
01:15:28,680 --> 01:15:30,523
(VOICE BREAKING)
Hello? Hello?
1698
01:15:30,600 --> 01:15:31,886
(STAMMERS) Hello?
1699
01:15:32,160 --> 01:15:33,286
Penny?
1700
01:15:33,440 --> 01:15:35,442
I can't hear you,
you're breaking up.
1701
01:15:35,600 --> 01:15:36,806
Penny?
1702
01:15:37,960 --> 01:15:40,691
Penny! How's this?
1703
01:15:41,040 --> 01:15:44,010
(VOICE BREAKING) Just hang on.
Don't go anywhere.
1704
01:15:44,200 --> 01:15:45,326
(STATIC)
1705
01:15:48,800 --> 01:15:49,847
Can you hear me now?
1706
01:15:49,960 --> 01:15:51,485
Yes, I can hear you now.
1707
01:15:51,640 --> 01:15:54,484
LLOYD: Good! I can hear
you loud and clear.
1708
01:15:55,000 --> 01:15:57,241
This is Lloyd,
your dad's good buddy.
1709
01:15:57,720 --> 01:16:00,564
Unfortunately, I don't
have him at the moment,
1710
01:16:01,000 --> 01:16:04,447
but, uh, he wanted me to ask you
to find a nice, romantic place
1711
01:16:04,520 --> 01:16:06,090
where we can all meet.
1712
01:16:07,800 --> 01:16:10,087
No, by "romantic"
I meant convenient.
1713
01:16:10,640 --> 01:16:13,644
And it has to be some place
outside the convention center.
1714
01:16:14,400 --> 01:16:15,640
(GRUNTS)
1715
01:16:16,360 --> 01:16:19,728
The fountain? On Main Street?
In 10 minutes?
1716
01:16:19,880 --> 01:16:21,166
Perfect!
1717
01:16:22,320 --> 01:16:23,526
Yes!
1718
01:16:24,000 --> 01:16:26,048
BARBARA: It's marvelous
to meet you, Mrs. Pinchelow.
1719
01:16:26,160 --> 01:16:27,844
I trust you had
a safe journey in?
1720
01:16:27,920 --> 01:16:29,046
It was lovely.
1721
01:16:29,160 --> 01:16:31,527
Great. We have a seat saved
for you in the front row.
1722
01:16:31,600 --> 01:16:34,251
We're just about to introduce
your charming husband.
1723
01:16:34,600 --> 01:16:36,045
My husband?
1724
01:16:37,160 --> 01:16:39,049
DR. MELDMANN: So let's
give a warm, KEN welcome
1725
01:16:39,120 --> 01:16:40,963
to our very
distinguished judge,
1726
01:16:41,040 --> 01:16:43,088
Dr. Bernard Pinchelow.
1727
01:16:43,200 --> 01:16:44,201
(APPLAUSE)
1728
01:17:29,120 --> 01:17:30,246
(WHISPERING) Hi!
1729
01:17:30,480 --> 01:17:31,606
Hello!
1730
01:17:33,440 --> 01:17:34,805
How about a hug?
1731
01:17:35,080 --> 01:17:36,320
Sure!
1732
01:17:36,960 --> 01:17:38,246
(GRUNTS)
1733
01:17:40,400 --> 01:17:41,401
Oh!
1734
01:17:42,560 --> 01:17:43,971
I love hellos.
1735
01:17:44,280 --> 01:17:45,964
Oh, me, too.
1736
01:17:46,120 --> 01:17:47,849
(GRUNTING)
1737
01:17:50,240 --> 01:17:51,241
Wow!
1738
01:17:51,320 --> 01:17:52,606
You're really
sweet, mister,
1739
01:17:52,680 --> 01:17:56,082
but I'm waiting for my dad and his
friend, so if you'll excuse me.
1740
01:17:57,120 --> 01:18:00,442
No, it's me, Lloyd!
1741
01:18:00,600 --> 01:18:02,090
Hi, Lloyd, I'm Penny.
1742
01:18:02,440 --> 01:18:04,488
On! Lloyd! Hi!
(CHUCKLING)
1743
01:18:04,760 --> 01:18:06,649
It's so nice to meet you!
1744
01:18:07,400 --> 01:18:09,323
Um, where's my dad?
1745
01:18:10,120 --> 01:18:13,806
Uh, he was delayed, so, uh,
he asked me to come by
1746
01:18:13,920 --> 01:18:15,001
and entertain you...
1747
01:18:15,080 --> 01:18:16,320
(BLUBBERING)
1748
01:18:17,280 --> 01:18:18,441
(CHUCKLING)
1749
01:18:18,800 --> 01:18:20,165
...until he can
meet up with us.
1750
01:18:21,200 --> 01:18:23,202
I think he wanted us
to have a chance to bond.
1751
01:18:24,800 --> 01:18:26,131
James Bond.
1752
01:18:26,680 --> 01:18:27,806
Great!
1753
01:18:27,880 --> 01:18:29,723
Are you hungry? Can I get
you something to eat?
1754
01:18:29,800 --> 01:18:31,290
Sure!
(EXHALES)
1755
01:18:31,640 --> 01:18:32,880
(CHUCKLING)
Awesome!
1756
01:18:37,640 --> 01:18:38,687
Wow!
1757
01:18:38,840 --> 01:18:40,126
We can go somewhere nice.
1758
01:18:40,280 --> 01:18:41,406
Sounds yummy!
1759
01:18:43,040 --> 01:18:44,405
Here, try this.
1760
01:18:44,560 --> 01:18:46,210
This is incredible popcorn.
1761
01:18:46,360 --> 01:18:49,409
And I know popcorn. I'm the
second-best popcorn maker I know.
1762
01:18:49,560 --> 01:18:51,608
All right, I'll take the bait.
Who's the third-best?
1763
01:18:51,680 --> 01:18:54,684
I know, right? I've
always wondered that!
1764
01:18:55,120 --> 01:18:56,610
(GRUNTS)
(LAUGHS)
1765
01:18:57,160 --> 01:18:58,924
Shrub club!
(LAUGHS)
1766
01:18:59,640 --> 01:19:00,846
Sorry!
1767
01:19:00,920 --> 01:19:03,571
It's just this game that I play
with my friends back home.
1768
01:19:04,400 --> 01:19:05,925
I love you!
1769
01:19:06,560 --> 01:19:07,766
What?
1770
01:19:08,400 --> 01:19:09,526
Um...
1771
01:19:09,840 --> 01:19:12,889
That's a direct quote,
from your dad.
1772
01:19:13,320 --> 01:19:14,401
(EXHALING)
"I love you."
1773
01:19:14,680 --> 01:19:15,761
His words.
1774
01:19:15,840 --> 01:19:17,251
Hey, wait a second.
1775
01:19:17,520 --> 01:19:19,249
How do I even know
that you know my dad?
1776
01:19:19,400 --> 01:19:21,402
You could be one of
those foreign guys
who always calls me up
1777
01:19:21,520 --> 01:19:23,090
and makes me get undressed
in front of the computer
1778
01:19:23,160 --> 01:19:24,764
because he lost
his passports and money.
1779
01:19:24,840 --> 01:19:26,524
No, no, that's not me.
1780
01:19:27,000 --> 01:19:28,923
Look, I can prove it.
1781
01:19:29,520 --> 01:19:30,885
I have your cell phone.
1782
01:19:31,000 --> 01:19:34,288
Oh, my gosh! No wonder no
one's been calling me!
1783
01:19:35,480 --> 01:19:36,481
Oh.
1784
01:19:37,440 --> 01:19:39,000
LLOYD: I, uh, plugged
my number in there
1785
01:19:39,600 --> 01:19:41,523
in case you need me
late at night.
1786
01:19:43,040 --> 01:19:46,362
Oh, and we brought your box.
You left it at the house,
you stupid idiot.
1787
01:19:46,480 --> 01:19:47,481
(BOTH CHUCKLE)
1788
01:19:47,880 --> 01:19:49,006
Hey, you wanna
see something neat?
1789
01:19:49,080 --> 01:19:50,286
Okay!
1790
01:19:53,040 --> 01:19:54,246
(GASPS)
1791
01:19:55,800 --> 01:19:59,361
Wait, are you sure that it's okay
for birds to be eating Pop Rocks?
1792
01:19:59,800 --> 01:20:01,840
I mean, you'd think it would
be bad for their teeth.
1793
01:20:02,240 --> 01:20:05,323
Nah! That's just
a suburban legend.
1794
01:20:05,400 --> 01:20:06,640
Oh.
(GUNSHOT)
1795
01:20:08,280 --> 01:20:09,441
Shit!
1796
01:20:13,640 --> 01:20:16,962
Spontaneous combustion,
however, totally real.
1797
01:20:17,080 --> 01:20:18,081
Oh.
1798
01:20:20,640 --> 01:20:21,971
(CELL PHONE RINGING)
1799
01:20:22,120 --> 01:20:24,487
What?
ADELE: You gotta
get back here right now.
1800
01:20:24,600 --> 01:20:26,011
One of those idiots
is in the building
1801
01:20:26,080 --> 01:20:27,923
and he's pretending
to be my husband!
1802
01:20:28,160 --> 01:20:30,208
Why don't you tell them
he's not your husband?
1803
01:20:30,280 --> 01:20:32,040
Because I don't even know
what they're up to.
1804
01:20:32,560 --> 01:20:34,289
He must be trying
to sell the box.
1805
01:20:34,600 --> 01:20:36,648
Just get back here!
1806
01:20:36,840 --> 01:20:40,128
This microscopic robot,
or nanobot
1807
01:20:40,520 --> 01:20:42,170
can be injected
into the human body
1808
01:20:42,320 --> 01:20:45,449
to detect and cure cancer.
1809
01:20:45,680 --> 01:20:46,681
(CROWD GASPS)
1810
01:20:47,080 --> 01:20:48,366
Interesting.
1811
01:20:49,080 --> 01:20:50,764
Can it sing?
(CROWD LAUGHS)
1812
01:20:51,800 --> 01:20:52,801
Uh...
1813
01:20:53,080 --> 01:20:54,161
What?
1814
01:20:54,280 --> 01:20:56,726
They got a large-mouth bass now
that you hang it on the wall.
1815
01:20:56,800 --> 01:20:59,644
When you walk past it,
it sings
Take Me to the River.
1816
01:20:59,720 --> 01:21:00,960
(ALL LAUGHING)
1817
01:21:04,520 --> 01:21:06,841
Are you saying...
What I'm saying is,
1818
01:21:07,000 --> 01:21:08,604
you're this close,
1819
01:21:08,800 --> 01:21:10,848
but there's a drawing board
you should be getting back to.
1820
01:21:11,000 --> 01:21:12,126
Next!
(CROWD LAUGHS)
1821
01:21:13,600 --> 01:21:15,728
But it cures cancer.
1822
01:21:22,920 --> 01:21:24,445
(INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS)
1823
01:21:25,280 --> 01:21:26,486
Ni hao.
1824
01:21:30,640 --> 01:21:31,846
Listen to this.
1825
01:21:31,960 --> 01:21:34,008
"You will do important
things in the world."
1826
01:21:34,480 --> 01:21:35,527
(GASPS)
That's so weird
1827
01:21:35,640 --> 01:21:38,325
because I actually want to do
important things in the world.
1828
01:21:38,400 --> 01:21:40,402
Wow. That's neat.
1829
01:21:41,000 --> 01:21:43,207
Someday, I wanna do
important things, too.
1830
01:21:43,320 --> 01:21:44,481
Oh, yeah? Like what?
1831
01:21:46,800 --> 01:21:48,928
I'm thinking about
getting new speakers.
1832
01:21:49,000 --> 01:21:50,365
Oh.
(SLURPS)
1833
01:21:51,360 --> 01:21:52,850
I've always wanted
to go to India
1834
01:21:52,920 --> 01:21:55,491
and volunteer at one of
those leprechaun colonies.
1835
01:21:55,760 --> 01:21:57,364
I think you mean Ireland.
1836
01:21:57,920 --> 01:21:59,126
Oh.
1837
01:21:59,320 --> 01:22:01,049
So what does
your cookie say?
1838
01:22:03,000 --> 01:22:04,843
"You will have
an amazing romance
1839
01:22:04,920 --> 01:22:07,526
"with the person sitted
across from you."
1840
01:22:07,760 --> 01:22:09,171
(BOTH CHUCKLE)
1841
01:22:09,520 --> 01:22:11,648
It's a good thing
I'm not your uncle.
1842
01:22:11,720 --> 01:22:14,007
"And don't be concerned
about the age difference.
1843
01:22:14,440 --> 01:22:16,169
"Just shut up
and make out.
1844
01:22:16,240 --> 01:22:19,005
"It will all sort itself
out later. You'll see!"
1845
01:22:19,440 --> 01:22:21,681
That's ridiculously specific.
Let me see that.
1846
01:22:23,400 --> 01:22:25,402
If you don't eat it,
it doesn't come true.
1847
01:22:28,880 --> 01:22:30,086
Hey, where's my dad?
1848
01:22:30,200 --> 01:22:31,645
Do you know if
Adele came with him?
1849
01:22:31,720 --> 01:22:33,280
She's probably the one
slowing him down.
1850
01:22:33,560 --> 01:22:34,891
Adele?
1851
01:22:35,040 --> 01:22:36,201
His wife.
1852
01:22:37,080 --> 01:22:38,286
Harry doesn't have a wife.
1853
01:22:38,520 --> 01:22:39,931
Who's Harry?
1854
01:22:40,520 --> 01:22:41,681
Your father.
1855
01:22:41,760 --> 01:22:42,966
My father's
name's not Harry.
1856
01:22:43,040 --> 01:22:44,040
It's Bernard.
1857
01:22:44,080 --> 01:22:46,048
Oh, yeah, but I'm talking
about your real dad.
1858
01:22:46,560 --> 01:22:47,686
Harry Dunne!
1859
01:22:47,760 --> 01:22:50,286
The guy who abandoned you when
you were a little, tiny baby.
1860
01:22:50,640 --> 01:22:51,926
You're gonna love him!
1861
01:22:52,600 --> 01:22:53,886
Wait a second.
1862
01:22:54,280 --> 01:22:55,805
So you're saying we're
supposed to be meeting
1863
01:22:55,880 --> 01:22:57,245
my biographical father?
1864
01:22:57,720 --> 01:22:58,767
Yes.
1865
01:22:58,960 --> 01:23:00,121
Here.
1866
01:23:00,400 --> 01:23:03,609
This is a letter from
your real mother, Fraida,
that you sent back to her.
1867
01:23:03,760 --> 01:23:04,886
Nice.
1868
01:23:05,080 --> 01:23:06,570
"Do not contact again."
1869
01:23:07,400 --> 01:23:08,640
This isn't my handwriting.
1870
01:23:08,720 --> 01:23:10,563
I don't even know cursive.
1871
01:23:13,080 --> 01:23:16,084
"Dear daughter, I gave you
up for adoption 18 years ago
1872
01:23:16,160 --> 01:23:18,242
"because I thought it was
the right thing to do.
1873
01:23:18,400 --> 01:23:20,641
"I hope and pray I made
the correct decision.
1874
01:23:20,800 --> 01:23:23,406
"You were conceived in Rhode
Island on a chilly autumn night
1875
01:23:23,480 --> 01:23:25,642
"in the parking lot
at Oyster Swallow Cove.
1876
01:23:25,760 --> 01:23:28,604
"We were young and stupid,
especially him."
1877
01:23:28,680 --> 01:23:30,125
(SOFTLY)
Oyster Swallow Cove?
1878
01:23:37,720 --> 01:23:39,370
FRAIDA: Are you ready, baby?
1879
01:23:39,720 --> 01:23:40,720
(BLOWS)
1880
01:23:40,760 --> 01:23:42,125
(SNIFFS)
1881
01:23:42,880 --> 01:23:44,086
Mmm-hmm.
1882
01:23:44,200 --> 01:23:45,361
Whoa! Whoa!
1883
01:23:45,720 --> 01:23:46,846
Slow down.
1884
01:23:46,920 --> 01:23:48,285
Let's be responsible here.
1885
01:23:49,000 --> 01:23:50,650
I brought some protection.
1886
01:23:52,520 --> 01:23:53,726
(CLICKS)
1887
01:23:54,520 --> 01:23:55,521
(SIGHS)
1888
01:23:55,600 --> 01:23:57,250
Let's do this.
1889
01:23:58,640 --> 01:24:00,563
(GRUNTING)
1890
01:24:01,920 --> 01:24:04,360
"So, if you ever wanna get in
touch, I would love to meet you.
1891
01:24:04,800 --> 01:24:07,610
"All my love, Fraida
Felcher, your mom."
1892
01:24:09,720 --> 01:24:11,290
That means I'm your...
1893
01:24:12,480 --> 01:24:13,641
And we almost...
1894
01:24:13,720 --> 01:24:15,643
Lloyd? Are you okay?
1895
01:24:16,320 --> 01:24:17,321
(GRUNTS)
1896
01:24:17,760 --> 01:24:20,000
I'm sorry, Lloyd, but I gotta
get back to the convention.
1897
01:24:20,040 --> 01:24:22,964
I'm supposed to be giving a big
speech for my dad any minute.
1898
01:24:23,040 --> 01:24:24,644
But, wait. We have
so much to talk about.
1899
01:24:24,720 --> 01:24:25,721
It's an emergency!
1900
01:24:25,800 --> 01:24:28,007
It's all a big misunderstanding!
I've gotta go!
1901
01:24:28,080 --> 01:24:29,491
(YELLING) Not dressed
like that, you're not!
1902
01:24:29,560 --> 01:24:31,005
You're grounded!
1903
01:24:34,880 --> 01:24:36,166
(WHISPERING)
Wait a minute.
1904
01:24:36,320 --> 01:24:38,004
If she's my kid,
1905
01:24:39,120 --> 01:24:41,168
then she's not
Harry's kid,
1906
01:24:41,240 --> 01:24:43,163
and he can't
take her kidneys.
1907
01:24:45,040 --> 01:24:46,485
What have I done?
1908
01:24:54,560 --> 01:24:55,891
Hi, I need to get in.
1909
01:24:56,200 --> 01:24:57,440
Credentials, please?
1910
01:24:57,520 --> 01:24:59,045
Oh, I'm giving a speech.
(CHUCKLES)
1911
01:24:59,720 --> 01:25:01,324
Credentials, please.
1912
01:25:01,600 --> 01:25:02,601
What is that?
1913
01:25:02,680 --> 01:25:05,286
Is it that thingy that they
gave me to get in here?
1914
01:25:06,120 --> 01:25:07,690
I think I've got
it here, somewhere.
1915
01:25:07,840 --> 01:25:11,731
Mister, l am appealing to your
sense of God and family.
1916
01:25:11,960 --> 01:25:13,121
I got a message
that my daughter,
1917
01:25:13,200 --> 01:25:15,441
who I have not
seen in 22 years,
1918
01:25:15,600 --> 01:25:16,681
is in there.
1919
01:25:16,880 --> 01:25:18,564
The event will be
letting out soon.
1920
01:25:18,640 --> 01:25:21,928
After 22 years,
what's another
couple of hours, right?
1921
01:25:22,240 --> 01:25:23,480
Okay, buddy.
1922
01:25:24,840 --> 01:25:26,763
There's got to be a, uh,
1923
01:25:26,840 --> 01:25:28,444
broom closet around
here somewhere, huh?
1924
01:25:29,320 --> 01:25:32,210
I'm sure we could
work something out.
1925
01:25:33,880 --> 01:25:36,929
I didn't take 34 years
to come out of the closet
1926
01:25:37,040 --> 01:25:38,405
just to go back into one
1927
01:25:38,480 --> 01:25:39,811
with you.
1928
01:25:41,080 --> 01:25:44,971
Okay, this device will give us a visual
rendering of your cognitive processes.
1929
01:25:45,720 --> 01:25:47,480
Could you repeat the question?
(CROWD LAUGHS)
1930
01:25:47,800 --> 01:25:50,280
This device will show us
what he's thinking
1931
01:25:50,560 --> 01:25:51,846
right on this screen.
1932
01:25:51,920 --> 01:25:52,967
(BLOWS RASPBERRY)
1933
01:25:53,080 --> 01:25:54,525
(CHUCKLING)
Yeah, really.
1934
01:25:54,600 --> 01:25:56,125
STUDENT: Go ahead,
Dr. Pinchelow.
1935
01:25:56,720 --> 01:25:58,880
Think of a pleasant memory
from your childhood. (BEEPS)
1936
01:25:59,080 --> 01:26:00,844
(SIGHS) okay-
1937
01:26:06,720 --> 01:26:07,721
(CROWD GASPS)
1938
01:26:10,400 --> 01:26:11,640
(CRACKLING)
1939
01:26:17,080 --> 01:26:18,081
(CROWD EXCLAIMS)
1940
01:26:18,160 --> 01:26:19,161
Oh!
1941
01:26:19,240 --> 01:26:20,366
YOUNG HARRY: Here, Biscuit!
1942
01:26:21,080 --> 01:26:22,127
Biscuit, come here, boy.
1943
01:26:22,200 --> 01:26:23,361
(WHISTLING)
1944
01:26:24,080 --> 01:26:25,286
The door, buddy.
Get the door.
1945
01:26:28,640 --> 01:26:29,926
(CROWD GROANS DISGUSTEDLY)
1946
01:26:31,600 --> 01:26:32,601
(SIGHS)
1947
01:26:32,760 --> 01:26:34,000
(GROANING)
1948
01:26:34,080 --> 01:26:35,411
Oh, okay.
1949
01:26:35,480 --> 01:26:36,970
(STUTTERING)
1950
01:26:37,800 --> 01:26:39,962
No! This gadget
is way off!
1951
01:26:40,040 --> 01:26:42,805
(CROWD GASPS) First of all,
my bedspread was orange.
1952
01:26:42,920 --> 01:26:44,251
(CROWD LAUGHS)
1953
01:26:57,840 --> 01:26:59,330
Are you okay, honey?
1954
01:26:59,520 --> 01:27:00,851
No, not really.
1955
01:27:01,040 --> 01:27:02,326
Boyfriend trouble?
1956
01:27:02,520 --> 01:27:04,602
No. I need a ticket
to get in
1957
01:27:04,680 --> 01:27:07,445
and I lost the ticket that they
need to take, plus, I lost my pass.
1958
01:27:07,520 --> 01:27:08,567
And I thought
that I grabbed it,
1959
01:27:08,640 --> 01:27:09,641
but when I looked
in my purse,
1960
01:27:09,720 --> 01:27:11,563
all I saw was
the toothbrush.
So maybe I took...
1961
01:27:11,640 --> 01:27:13,051
Okay, okay, okay-
1962
01:27:13,240 --> 01:27:14,241
(SIGHS)
1963
01:27:14,320 --> 01:27:15,481
All right.
1964
01:27:16,160 --> 01:27:17,241
What's going on?
1965
01:27:17,400 --> 01:27:19,687
My father's supposed to be
getting a huge reward,
1966
01:27:19,800 --> 01:27:21,400
and I'm supposed to be
making the speech,
1967
01:27:21,560 --> 01:27:23,050
and the speech is supposed
to start right now,
1968
01:27:23,160 --> 01:27:25,280
and there's no way they'll
let me in without a ticket.
1969
01:27:27,160 --> 01:27:28,491
Oh, honey.
1970
01:27:29,400 --> 01:27:31,926
There is always a way.
1971
01:27:35,200 --> 01:27:37,009
I admit,
it's thought-provoking.
1972
01:27:37,160 --> 01:27:39,288
An invention that
ends world hunger.
1973
01:27:39,360 --> 01:27:41,601
But, have you
considered this,
1974
01:27:41,920 --> 01:27:43,490
where does all
the extra poop go?
1975
01:27:43,560 --> 01:27:44,607
(ALL LAUGHING)
1976
01:27:44,680 --> 01:27:45,841
What? No.
1977
01:27:45,920 --> 01:27:47,410
The point is that
there's no more hunger.
1978
01:27:47,520 --> 01:27:48,487
Excuse me,
ladies and gentlemen.
1979
01:27:48,560 --> 01:27:49,846
We're gonna take
a very brief break.
1980
01:27:49,920 --> 01:27:50,967
Uh, please stay
in your seats
1981
01:27:51,040 --> 01:27:53,008
and we will resume,
uh, shortly.
1982
01:27:53,120 --> 01:27:54,167
Why?
1983
01:27:54,240 --> 01:27:55,571
We're gonna have
to take a walk.
1984
01:27:55,720 --> 01:27:57,245
Come on.
I'm judging.
1985
01:27:57,360 --> 01:27:58,725
You're out of here.
Okay!
1986
01:27:58,840 --> 01:28:00,080
You're out.
1987
01:28:00,360 --> 01:28:01,361
Mrs. P,
1988
01:28:01,520 --> 01:28:02,521
what are you
doing here?
1989
01:28:02,600 --> 01:28:05,729
Do you always
call your wife
Mrs. P?
1990
01:28:06,360 --> 01:28:07,691
Oh, uh...
1991
01:28:08,880 --> 01:28:10,803
How you doing, sugar tits?
I missed you.
1992
01:28:10,880 --> 01:28:12,530
This man is a fraud.
1993
01:28:12,720 --> 01:28:14,722
And that box belongs
to my husband.
1994
01:28:15,040 --> 01:28:16,087
He stole it from us.
1995
01:28:16,200 --> 01:28:17,247
Hand it over, buddy.
1996
01:28:17,320 --> 01:28:19,687
Uh-uh. I swore I'd only
give this box to Penny.
1997
01:28:19,760 --> 01:28:21,762
Give me the box!
Here you go.
1998
01:28:22,200 --> 01:28:23,565
(ALARM WAILING)
1999
01:28:25,840 --> 01:28:26,880
(INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS)
2000
01:28:27,040 --> 01:28:28,960
ADELE: What's happening?
BARBARA: I have no idea.
2001
01:28:29,240 --> 01:28:30,287
Hey!
2002
01:28:30,400 --> 01:28:32,402
Hey, hey!
Get back here!
2003
01:28:32,720 --> 01:28:34,245
Out of my way!
2004
01:28:36,480 --> 01:28:38,244
Thanks a lot, lady!
2005
01:28:38,720 --> 01:28:40,165
It's the least I could do.
2006
01:28:40,680 --> 01:28:41,761
(CHUCKLES)
2007
01:28:43,400 --> 01:28:44,686
(SIGHS DEEPLY)
2008
01:28:46,240 --> 01:28:47,571
(STUTTERS)
2009
01:28:48,400 --> 01:28:50,243
There's something
I need to tell you.
2010
01:28:50,440 --> 01:28:51,771
(STAMMERS)
You're my...
2011
01:28:54,160 --> 01:28:55,525
Okay. The reason
I'm here is...
2012
01:28:55,640 --> 01:28:56,687
HARRY: Fraida!
2013
01:28:56,960 --> 01:28:58,325
FRAIDA: Harry?
(CHUCKLES)
2014
01:28:58,440 --> 01:28:59,680
You made it!
Oh!
2015
01:29:01,440 --> 01:29:03,010
Oh, and you found Penny.
2016
01:29:03,960 --> 01:29:05,928
Hey, how do you
know my...
2017
01:29:06,000 --> 01:29:08,287
Oh! You're Harry?
2018
01:29:08,360 --> 01:29:10,362
Yes! And I'm your mother!
2019
01:29:10,760 --> 01:29:11,761
(GASPS)
2020
01:29:13,200 --> 01:29:14,804
He's got a gun!
(ALL SCREAMING)
2021
01:29:38,600 --> 01:29:39,965
(DOOR CREAKS OPEN)
2022
01:30:09,240 --> 01:30:10,685
Why you standing
in the toilet?
2023
01:30:11,320 --> 01:30:12,845
So you wouldn't
see my feet.
2024
01:30:13,480 --> 01:30:14,925
Why not just
stand on the rim?
2025
01:30:15,040 --> 01:30:17,008
There's ball hairs
all over that thing.
2026
01:30:17,080 --> 01:30:18,206
I'm not stupid.
2027
01:30:20,080 --> 01:30:21,844
Get out of there!
Move it!
2028
01:30:22,320 --> 01:30:23,560
Now!
2029
01:30:24,520 --> 01:30:26,249
Please don't hurt Penny,
Mrs. P.
2030
01:30:26,320 --> 01:30:29,563
She's young and still has most
of her future ahead of her.
2031
01:30:29,680 --> 01:30:31,011
Get the box.
2032
01:30:33,400 --> 01:30:36,210
Harry! There you are!
2033
01:30:36,600 --> 01:30:39,206
(CHUCKLES)
Good thing you're loud.
2034
01:30:40,000 --> 01:30:41,525
What are you
doing, Mrs. P?
2035
01:30:41,600 --> 01:30:42,761
I'm about to kill you.
2036
01:30:43,040 --> 01:30:44,690
Wait, wait, wait!
2037
01:30:45,200 --> 01:30:46,531
Can't you kill
someone else?
2038
01:30:46,600 --> 01:30:48,045
My daughter, Penny,
needs me now.
2039
01:30:48,440 --> 01:30:50,560
What are you
talking about, Lloyd?
Penny's my daughter.
2040
01:30:50,880 --> 01:30:52,564
No, Harry, she isn't.
Mmm-mmm.
2041
01:30:52,800 --> 01:30:53,881
What?
2042
01:30:53,960 --> 01:30:56,122
Why would you think
that she's your daughter?
2043
01:30:56,600 --> 01:30:58,728
Because of the postcard.
2044
01:30:59,200 --> 01:31:01,726
I was about to be a single
mom and I needed money.
2045
01:31:01,880 --> 01:31:03,405
And you owed me 40 bucks
2046
01:31:03,520 --> 01:31:06,285
from that stupid
worm farm loan.
2047
01:31:07,200 --> 01:31:08,645
LLOYD: It's true, Har.
2048
01:31:09,560 --> 01:31:11,847
I'm the deadbeat dad,
not you.
2049
01:31:11,920 --> 01:31:12,921
(YELPS)
2050
01:31:13,120 --> 01:31:14,804
I'm Penny's baby-papa.
2051
01:31:15,080 --> 01:31:16,081
(HOWLS)
2052
01:31:16,320 --> 01:31:18,084
But don't judge me
till you see this.
2053
01:31:18,400 --> 01:31:21,290
Oh, yeah, like a cooler
of cold brewskies
2054
01:31:21,360 --> 01:31:23,010
is gonna make
everything okay!
2055
01:31:23,120 --> 01:31:24,770
It's not beer,
it's my kidney!
2056
01:31:28,280 --> 01:31:29,566
Your kidney?
2057
01:31:30,560 --> 01:31:31,766
I figured
2058
01:31:32,920 --> 01:31:35,241
since you can't
get one from Penny,
2059
01:31:36,000 --> 01:31:37,411
I'd give it to you myself.
2060
01:31:38,120 --> 01:31:39,451
Holy shit.
2061
01:31:40,680 --> 01:31:42,091
How did you get this?
(PANTING)
2062
01:31:42,480 --> 01:31:45,086
I crossed the border
into Mexico.
2063
01:31:45,520 --> 01:31:48,808
Turns out, the medical regs are
a little more chill down there.
2064
01:31:49,080 --> 01:31:51,890
Pardon me for bringing this
up, but I don't give a shit!
2065
01:31:51,960 --> 01:31:55,169
Yeah, but, Lloyd, she isn't
your daughter either.
2066
01:31:55,840 --> 01:31:57,569
Nice try, Fraida,
2067
01:31:57,640 --> 01:31:59,722
but Penny
read me the letter.
2068
01:31:59,800 --> 01:32:02,007
I know all about
Oyster Swallow Cove,
2069
01:32:02,120 --> 01:32:03,920
which is exactly where
you took me in the van!
2070
01:32:03,960 --> 01:32:05,041
So?
2071
01:32:05,200 --> 01:32:07,043
That was my spot.
2072
01:32:07,440 --> 01:32:10,205
I must have taken
hundreds of guys there.
2073
01:32:11,200 --> 01:32:12,361
What can I say?
2074
01:32:13,640 --> 01:32:15,449
I was a titanic whore.
2075
01:32:16,040 --> 01:32:17,804
That's enough bullshit.
2076
01:32:18,200 --> 01:32:19,804
Go ahead, Lippincott,
kill them.
2077
01:32:20,960 --> 01:32:22,121
LIPPINCOTT: Oh, I will.
2078
01:32:22,840 --> 01:32:25,491
But first, why don't
you join them.
2079
01:32:25,640 --> 01:32:26,687
(BREATHING HEAVILY)
What?
2080
01:32:26,800 --> 01:32:28,484
You heard me.
Drop it!
2081
01:32:28,560 --> 01:32:30,210
Get over there!
Get over there!
2082
01:32:30,280 --> 01:32:32,681
You're kidding.
She's on our team now?
2083
01:32:33,480 --> 01:32:34,766
Don't do this, Lippincott.
2084
01:32:34,840 --> 01:32:35,966
You're a military man.
2085
01:32:36,320 --> 01:32:38,129
I know you've got
more integrity than this!
2086
01:32:41,120 --> 01:32:42,326
What is this?
2087
01:32:42,560 --> 01:32:43,561
Huh?
2088
01:32:43,960 --> 01:32:45,371
Two cupcakes?
2089
01:32:45,960 --> 01:32:47,520
Actually, there were
four cupcakes, sir.
2090
01:32:47,880 --> 01:32:49,803
I ate the two chocolate ones.
Lloyd!
2091
01:32:49,880 --> 01:32:52,167
It's okay. I left the
vanilla ones for humanity.
2092
01:32:52,240 --> 01:32:53,810
Where's the invention?
2093
01:32:54,320 --> 01:32:56,800
Where's the goddamn
billion-dollar invention?
2094
01:32:56,880 --> 01:32:57,881
(INDISTINCT YELLING)
2095
01:32:58,040 --> 01:32:59,883
Put the gun down!
Freeze!
2096
01:33:00,000 --> 01:33:01,684
Put the gun down,
Lippincott!
2097
01:33:03,320 --> 01:33:04,320
(CLATTERS)
2098
01:33:04,360 --> 01:33:05,486
(DOOR CREAKS OPEN)
2099
01:33:06,840 --> 01:33:08,729
Well! Hello.
2100
01:33:08,840 --> 01:33:09,887
Dad!
2101
01:33:10,000 --> 01:33:12,810
Bernard. Oh, thank
God you're here.
2102
01:33:12,880 --> 01:33:14,325
God, and you're okay!
2103
01:33:14,520 --> 01:33:15,851
Stop right there.
2104
01:33:15,920 --> 01:33:16,967
What?
2105
01:33:17,040 --> 01:33:18,405
I appreciate
your concern, Adele,
2106
01:33:18,480 --> 01:33:20,323
but it's a little
late for that.
2107
01:33:20,400 --> 01:33:21,561
You see...
2108
01:33:21,680 --> 01:33:22,680
I couldn't stop wondering
2109
01:33:22,720 --> 01:33:25,007
why every time
I ate your cooking,
I was getting sicker.
2110
01:33:25,360 --> 01:33:26,725
And then when Harry
and Lloyd showed me
2111
01:33:26,800 --> 01:33:28,240
the letter from
Penny's birth mother,
2112
01:33:28,320 --> 01:33:29,845
I recognized that
the handwriting
2113
01:33:29,920 --> 01:33:31,809
sending it back
was yours.
2114
01:33:32,040 --> 01:33:33,724
And the cruelty of this
got me to thinking.
2115
01:33:34,240 --> 01:33:37,881
So l laid a little trap,
and lo and behold,
you took the bait
2116
01:33:38,040 --> 01:33:40,008
like the toe-sucking
rat that you are.
2117
01:33:41,000 --> 01:33:42,161
After you left for El Paso,
2118
01:33:42,240 --> 01:33:44,686
I called the FBI to make
sure Penny was protected.
2119
01:33:44,760 --> 01:33:47,047
I thought those Canadian
accents were a little shaky.
2120
01:33:47,160 --> 01:33:49,049
Yeah? You try it.
2121
01:33:49,720 --> 01:33:51,370
But what about
the invention?
2122
01:33:51,720 --> 01:33:53,848
It was just cupcakes.
2123
01:33:54,160 --> 01:33:56,208
A gift for
Dr. Barbara Walcott
2124
01:33:56,280 --> 01:33:58,169
for my having canceled
at the last moment.
2125
01:33:58,240 --> 01:33:59,526
This is great, Dad!
2126
01:33:59,600 --> 01:34:02,410
Now you can pick up
your Lifetime Achievement
reward in person!
2127
01:34:02,520 --> 01:34:04,727
It's "award,"
you stupid bitch!
2128
01:34:05,240 --> 01:34:06,287
No!
2129
01:34:07,000 --> 01:34:08,001
(GROANING)
2130
01:34:08,480 --> 01:34:09,481
(GRUNTING)
2131
01:34:13,480 --> 01:34:14,481
(INDISTINCT YELLING)
2132
01:34:14,560 --> 01:34:16,289
BOTH: Break it up! Get off!
2133
01:34:16,400 --> 01:34:18,448
Hands behind your back.
Hands behind your back.
(GRUNTING)
2134
01:34:18,560 --> 01:34:20,801
I'm the good guy here!
All right.
2135
01:34:20,880 --> 01:34:21,881
(PANTS)
2136
01:34:21,960 --> 01:34:23,769
Are you okay, Har?
2137
01:34:24,040 --> 01:34:25,246
I think so.
2138
01:34:25,480 --> 01:34:26,925
(BREATHING HEAVILY)
2139
01:34:31,240 --> 01:34:33,561
Oh, yeah,
it's just a little graze.
2140
01:34:34,080 --> 01:34:36,082
Uh, Har?
2141
01:34:36,240 --> 01:34:38,686
You might wanna put
a dab of Bactine on that.
2142
01:34:38,760 --> 01:34:39,921
(SIREN WAILING)
2143
01:34:42,480 --> 01:34:43,606
Hurry, he's been shot!
2144
01:34:43,680 --> 01:34:44,681
MAN: We need a trauma room.
2145
01:34:44,760 --> 01:34:46,444
You're gonna be okay.
What have we got?
2146
01:34:46,560 --> 01:34:48,483
Gunshot wound,
left shoulder.
2147
01:34:48,960 --> 01:34:50,200
Lloyd, the kidney!
2148
01:34:50,280 --> 01:34:51,406
Kidney?
2149
01:34:51,480 --> 01:34:52,606
Oh, yeah.
2150
01:34:52,680 --> 01:34:54,762
Would you, by any chance,
have time this evening
2151
01:34:55,000 --> 01:34:56,365
to swap out a kidney?
2152
01:34:56,440 --> 01:34:58,249
I'm sorry, sir.
What is this?
2153
01:34:58,640 --> 01:35:00,768
It's a kidney.
My kidney.
2154
01:35:01,240 --> 01:35:02,730
It's for him,
2155
01:35:02,840 --> 01:35:04,888
my best pal.
(GROANING) Ah!
2156
01:35:04,960 --> 01:35:05,961
He needs it.
2157
01:35:07,400 --> 01:35:09,687
Gentlemen,
this is not a kidney.
2158
01:35:10,440 --> 01:35:11,680
What is it?
2159
01:35:12,120 --> 01:35:13,849
Better not be my heart.
DOCTOR: No.
2160
01:35:14,680 --> 01:35:17,126
I believe it's a pork chop.
2161
01:35:17,480 --> 01:35:19,005
In a baggie.
(CHUCKLING)
2162
01:35:20,080 --> 01:35:23,527
I wondered why my
kidney had grill marks.
2163
01:35:24,080 --> 01:35:25,764
And a bone.
2164
01:35:26,520 --> 01:35:27,646
Hey, wait.
2165
01:35:27,800 --> 01:35:30,201
Does that mean I still
have all my kidneys?
2166
01:35:31,000 --> 01:35:32,161
Let's have a look.
2167
01:35:33,080 --> 01:35:34,081
Ah.
2168
01:35:35,320 --> 01:35:36,970
I'm going to say
probably not.
2169
01:35:38,640 --> 01:35:39,801
That's it.
2170
01:35:40,000 --> 01:35:42,526
I am gonna give
that quack an earful
2171
01:35:42,680 --> 01:35:45,001
at my follow-up
appointment next Tuesday.
2172
01:35:46,320 --> 01:35:48,163
(SOBBING)
I'm sorry, Harry.
2173
01:35:48,360 --> 01:35:50,044
I failed you again!
2174
01:35:50,800 --> 01:35:51,801
(SNIFFLES)
2175
01:35:51,880 --> 01:35:53,450
It's okay, Lloyd.
2176
01:35:53,600 --> 01:35:55,682
(SNIFFLES)
I forgive you.
2177
01:35:56,160 --> 01:35:57,491
(SNICKERS)
2178
01:35:58,840 --> 01:36:00,171
LLOYD: What's so funny?
2179
01:36:00,840 --> 01:36:02,171
Got ya!
2180
01:36:03,000 --> 01:36:04,001
(MUMBLES)
2181
01:36:04,360 --> 01:36:06,408
I never needed a kidney!
2182
01:36:06,480 --> 01:36:07,766
(LAUGHS)
2183
01:36:09,360 --> 01:36:10,361
What?
2184
01:36:10,520 --> 01:36:12,682
Oh, you should have seen
the look on your face!
2185
01:36:12,800 --> 01:36:15,201
I got you so good!
2186
01:36:15,280 --> 01:36:16,520
(LAUGHING)
(EXHALES)
2187
01:36:16,680 --> 01:36:18,205
Wait a minute.
2188
01:36:18,360 --> 01:36:19,725
You mean,
2189
01:36:19,880 --> 01:36:22,929
I had my kidney removed
2190
01:36:23,400 --> 01:36:25,641
in the backseat
of a Toyota Tercel
2191
01:36:26,080 --> 01:36:28,162
and you were faking?
Uh-huh.
2192
01:36:29,880 --> 01:36:31,484
That is awesome!
2193
01:36:31,800 --> 01:36:32,801
(LAUGHING)
2194
01:36:34,040 --> 01:36:35,690
That is a good one.
2195
01:36:37,600 --> 01:36:39,364
Totally worth it!
2196
01:36:40,840 --> 01:36:43,002
Gentlemen, I hate to break
up this Mensa summit,
2197
01:36:43,080 --> 01:36:44,650
but we've gotta get this
man's shoulder cleaned out.
2198
01:36:44,720 --> 01:36:46,040
Do you remember,
you've been shot?
2199
01:36:46,720 --> 01:36:48,688
That was a good
gag, Harry.
2200
01:36:48,760 --> 01:36:49,761
(LAUGHING)
2201
01:36:50,080 --> 01:36:52,367
But don't you think it still
would have been funny
2202
01:36:52,560 --> 01:36:55,928
if you had told me you were kidding
before I lost my vital organ?
2203
01:36:56,080 --> 01:36:58,811
Oh, definitely.
But not as!
2204
01:36:58,880 --> 01:37:00,041
(LAUGHING)
2205
01:37:03,720 --> 01:37:05,210
That's true.
2206
01:37:17,600 --> 01:37:19,523
You guys are so cool.
2207
01:37:19,600 --> 01:37:21,967
How can I ever thank you
for what you did for me?
2208
01:37:22,080 --> 01:37:23,605
Got any cash?
2209
01:37:23,920 --> 01:37:25,160
Oh, yeah.
2210
01:37:25,240 --> 01:37:26,446
I think
I've got a couple...
2211
01:37:26,960 --> 01:37:28,041
Thanks.
2212
01:37:28,600 --> 01:37:30,045
Score.
2213
01:37:31,080 --> 01:37:32,366
(PINCHELOW LAUGHING)
2214
01:37:33,280 --> 01:37:34,441
(LAUGHING)
2215
01:37:37,120 --> 01:37:38,451
(PINCHELOW CLEARS THROAT)
2216
01:37:38,520 --> 01:37:39,646
Oh, uh...
2217
01:37:40,160 --> 01:37:42,811
I'm sure those janitors
will thank us later. Mmm.
2218
01:37:43,120 --> 01:37:45,040
We were just straightening
up their broom closet.
2219
01:37:45,360 --> 01:37:46,691
FRAIDA: Penny,
wonderful news!
2220
01:37:47,120 --> 01:37:50,283
Your father has invited me to
come stay with you for a while,
2221
01:37:50,440 --> 01:37:52,602
so we can really get
to know each other.
2222
01:37:52,880 --> 01:37:54,530
That's fantastic!
2223
01:37:55,280 --> 01:37:57,123
So let me ask you
something, Fraida.
2224
01:37:57,440 --> 01:38:00,284
If I'm not Penny's father
and Lloyd's not her father,
2225
01:38:00,400 --> 01:38:02,050
then who's her father?
2226
01:38:02,480 --> 01:38:03,925
Funny you should ask.
2227
01:38:04,200 --> 01:38:05,406
Honey,
2228
01:38:05,560 --> 01:38:08,564
how would you like to
meet some relatives?
2229
01:38:12,120 --> 01:38:13,770
LLOYD: Mr. Stainer?
2230
01:38:14,280 --> 01:38:15,566
Oh, I should have known.
2231
01:38:15,720 --> 01:38:17,882
(YELLING)
You horny, old goat!
2232
01:38:17,960 --> 01:38:19,610
No, Lloyd!
2233
01:38:20,160 --> 01:38:22,640
Mr. Stainer is
Penny's grandfather.
2234
01:38:22,800 --> 01:38:24,131
Come on.
2235
01:38:26,160 --> 01:38:29,562
So, you mean
Pee-Stain is the dad?
2236
01:38:30,560 --> 01:38:31,800
Duh!
2237
01:38:35,200 --> 01:38:36,531
(CHUCKLING)
2238
01:38:38,480 --> 01:38:39,925
Hi!
2239
01:38:40,000 --> 01:38:41,161
Oh...
2240
01:38:41,840 --> 01:38:43,604
She's beautiful!
2241
01:38:44,240 --> 01:38:45,844
Sweet Jesus,
look at her.
2242
01:38:46,760 --> 01:38:48,410
She's got Peter's eyes.
2243
01:38:48,480 --> 01:38:49,481
You're kidding!
2244
01:38:49,600 --> 01:38:51,170
He donated them?
2245
01:38:52,280 --> 01:38:53,520
Hi, Pee-Stain!
2246
01:38:53,680 --> 01:38:55,125
Stainy!
2247
01:38:55,600 --> 01:38:57,921
Hey, sorry
you got killed!
2248
01:38:58,680 --> 01:39:01,684
Let's get you away
from these guys, huh?
Let's go.
2249
01:39:01,840 --> 01:39:03,046
PINCHELOW: Yeah.
2250
01:39:04,520 --> 01:39:08,127
Guys, there's still one
thing I don't understand.
2251
01:39:08,680 --> 01:39:12,446
How could either of you
have possibly thought
2252
01:39:12,520 --> 01:39:14,443
that you were
Penny's father?
2253
01:39:15,200 --> 01:39:17,521
(SCOFFS) Why wouldn't we?
Yeah!
2254
01:39:17,880 --> 01:39:19,530
Because we never had sex.
2255
01:39:19,760 --> 01:39:21,046
Oh. (CHUCKLES)
2256
01:39:21,120 --> 01:39:22,485
(SNICKERING)
2257
01:39:25,280 --> 01:39:27,044
You could have fooled us.
2258
01:39:27,160 --> 01:39:28,650
Yeah, nice try,
Snow White.
2259
01:39:28,720 --> 01:39:31,200
Does the word "hot tub"
jog your memory?
2260
01:39:31,400 --> 01:39:32,447
If I recall,
2261
01:39:32,520 --> 01:39:34,807
I played with your boobies
for a long time that night.
2262
01:39:34,880 --> 01:39:35,961
The motor boat,
2263
01:39:36,040 --> 01:39:37,246
the windshield wipers,
2264
01:39:37,320 --> 01:39:38,560
the punching bag.
2265
01:39:38,720 --> 01:39:39,801
You know, Harry,
2266
01:39:39,880 --> 01:39:42,884
you can't get a woman pregnant
by man-handling her breasts.
2267
01:39:43,080 --> 01:39:44,081
Oh, really?
2268
01:39:44,160 --> 01:39:46,561
Then why did your
doorbells get so hard?
(BOTH CHUCKLE)
2269
01:39:46,800 --> 01:39:49,167
Yeah. And did you forget
about the French tickler,
2270
01:39:49,240 --> 01:39:50,480
in the back of the van?
2271
01:39:50,560 --> 01:39:54,326
Putting a frilly,
glow-in-the-dark
condom on your finger
2272
01:39:54,400 --> 01:39:56,402
is not the same
as having sex.
2273
01:39:56,560 --> 01:39:57,641
But what if
I go like this?
2274
01:39:57,760 --> 01:39:58,921
(GIBBERING)
2275
01:39:59,360 --> 01:40:00,407
No.
2276
01:40:00,480 --> 01:40:03,882
Okay, Dr. Picasso, what's
your definition of sex?
2277
01:40:06,080 --> 01:40:07,241
(WHISPERING)
2278
01:40:08,840 --> 01:40:10,251
No way!
2279
01:40:10,520 --> 01:40:11,760
That's just...
2280
01:40:11,920 --> 01:40:13,206
Not my mom!
2281
01:40:13,360 --> 01:40:14,600
But that's where
she pees!
2282
01:40:14,680 --> 01:40:17,923
It's in my head
and I can't unlearn it!
2283
01:40:18,160 --> 01:40:19,605
You're bad!
2284
01:40:19,680 --> 01:40:20,761
Can you show us?
2285
01:40:20,840 --> 01:40:22,444
I call sloppy seconds!
2286
01:40:23,480 --> 01:40:24,641
(SIGHS)
2287
01:40:26,440 --> 01:40:29,410
Looks like everyone else
ended up with someone.
2288
01:40:29,960 --> 01:40:31,041
Yep-
2289
01:40:31,120 --> 01:40:32,531
And I got this pork chop.
2290
01:40:32,600 --> 01:40:33,761
(CHUCKLES)
2291
01:40:34,080 --> 01:40:35,730
So let me get
this straight, Har.
2292
01:40:36,080 --> 01:40:38,606
When you visited me in the
nuthouse the last time...
2293
01:40:38,720 --> 01:40:40,240
Uh-huh... you knew
about Penny already?
2294
01:40:40,280 --> 01:40:42,521
No, I found out about her
when we visited my parents.
2295
01:40:42,640 --> 01:40:45,450
But I had finally figured
out that you were faking.
2296
01:40:45,640 --> 01:40:47,051
Really? How?
Mmm-hmm.
2297
01:40:47,120 --> 01:40:48,121
What gave it away?
2298
01:40:48,240 --> 01:40:50,891
A few months ago,
I was changing your
diaper before bedtime
2299
01:40:50,960 --> 01:40:53,964
and you just seemed
a little too upbeat.
2300
01:40:55,800 --> 01:40:57,131
Lloyd,
2301
01:40:57,320 --> 01:40:59,402
even though
it's Christmas Eve,
2302
01:40:59,760 --> 01:41:02,570
I want you to know
that there's no place
I would rather be
2303
01:41:02,640 --> 01:41:05,564
than right here, wiping
my best friend's dookie.
2304
01:41:05,760 --> 01:41:06,761
(PARTS)
2305
01:41:07,680 --> 01:41:08,681
Oh. (CHUCKLES)
2306
01:41:08,800 --> 01:41:11,121
Looks like we got
another stocking stuffer.
2307
01:41:11,280 --> 01:41:12,486
(CHUCKLES)
2308
01:41:15,280 --> 01:41:16,770
(CHUCKLING)
I remember that.
2309
01:41:17,160 --> 01:41:19,606
That was the night
I had all that eggnog
and lamb, right?
2310
01:41:19,800 --> 01:41:20,847
Yeah. Whoa!
2311
01:41:21,320 --> 01:41:22,401
Lloyd!
2312
01:41:26,000 --> 01:41:28,401
Check out the hotties
at 12 o'clock.
2313
01:41:28,760 --> 01:41:30,410
That's almost
three hours away.
2314
01:41:30,520 --> 01:41:32,170
Can't I check
them out now?
2315
01:41:32,320 --> 01:41:33,321
(GRUNTING)
2316
01:41:34,200 --> 01:41:35,725
(BOTH BREATHING HEAVILY)
2317
01:41:37,720 --> 01:41:39,484
(SPUTTERING)
2318
01:41:40,840 --> 01:41:41,921
Okay, Lloyd,
2319
01:41:42,000 --> 01:41:45,083
This time we're not gonna be
stupid and pass up a sure thing.
2320
01:41:45,200 --> 01:41:46,645
I hear you, Har.
2321
01:41:47,440 --> 01:41:49,124
We'll never get
another chance like this.
2322
01:41:49,200 --> 01:41:51,521
Our time
has finally come.
2323
01:41:57,360 --> 01:41:58,566
(BOTH SCREAM)
2324
01:41:59,120 --> 01:42:00,485
BOTH: Bush club!
2325
01:42:00,560 --> 01:42:01,561
(BOTH LAUGHING)
2326
01:42:17,480 --> 01:42:19,244
(FOLK MUSIC PLAYING)
2327
01:48:46,440 --> 01:48:47,601
Oh, crap!
2328
01:48:48,080 --> 01:48:50,526
I ordered a vanilla shake and
they gave me a chocolate one.
2329
01:48:50,600 --> 01:48:52,568
Tell me about it. I ordered
a chocolate shake.
2330
01:48:52,640 --> 01:48:54,529
Those dopes gave me
a vanilla one.
2331
01:48:54,640 --> 01:48:56,290
They do that a lot.
2332
01:48:58,440 --> 01:48:59,771
What the hell?
2333
01:49:01,680 --> 01:49:03,250
Kick his ass, Seabass!
2334
01:49:03,680 --> 01:49:05,240
SEABASS: Arr, the dirty
sons-of-bitches!
2334
01:49:06,305 --> 01:50:06,939
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