Original subtitles

[Dramatic music]

♪ ♪

Really crazy weather.

Because I'm fasting, my body is getting slower.

It's almost as if I am the subject of my own experiments.

I'm not afraid, but everything is a struggle.

All right.

I'm pushing past my limit each and every day.

And clinically, I know that I'm declining.

I'm gonna have to eat the last piece of grouse,

and super important, the last wishbone.

I wish that sharing this experience with my mom

brings us closer together.

That half a million dollars won't fix everything,

but it'll get me close.

There's three traps right here. No squirrels.

I'm so excited to, like, get this far in the journey.

It's hard work, but it's where my drive just keeps

pushing me to go forward.

Oh, I see him.

It's under a big log.

♪ ♪

Oh.

I got a squirrel! [laughs]

Holy [bleep]. Oh, my God.

♪ ♪

I can't wait to have this place try and break me.

Narrator: For the first time on "Alone,"

ten participants fight to survive

in the hunting ground of the world's largest

land predator...

Oh, my God, where'd he go?

Those are bear.

I heard a big animal.

- Hey, bear. - Oh, no.

[Bleep]

- Sometimes you eat the bear. - [exhales]

Sometimes the bear eats you.

Narrator: Battling merciless conditions...

This is some hardcore bushwhacking.

Why does it have to be such a struggle every night?

I hit it. I hit it. I hit it.

Feel more alive every day I'm out here.

- [Sighs] - Here comes the rain again.

Labrador, not gonna make it easy for us, are you?

Narrator: In complete isolation.

The most dangerous thing out here is myself.

Look at that!

The cold ground is just pulling

all the warmth from me.

How many days can this go on?

Very, very hungry.

I feel like I'm hitting a wall.

Narrator: Last one standing wins.

Only gonna get harder the longer you stay out here.

♪ ♪

Oh, it's beautiful.

In a winter wonderland.

It's quiet, no birds, no squirrels, nothing.

Must be the snow. I don't know.

But I'm feeling really, really tired.

Think I'm just gonna go up the hill to get some firewood,

and, uh, yeah...

♪ ♪

Every day, I'm pushing, and I feel like

I've been walking a line.

Last night, I had almost a pot full of food,

and I'm still getting weak.

Come on, trees, give me something to work with.

I'm running out of trees that I can

realistically walk to, snap their branches,

and come back home.

I can feel my energy kind of going down a little bit.

♪ ♪

Doing everything I can to address everything that I can.

♪ ♪

Found two good trees.

♪ ♪

Think I can only do one bundle, guys.

♪ ♪

Feel like I'm reaching a limit over here.

All right, let's go back.

♪ ♪

Okay, I'm home.

♪ ♪

Yeah.

♪ ♪

[sighs] I'm freaking exhausted.

It's too much.

I did too much today.

♪ ♪

I'm ready to take a really long break.

♪ ♪

Here we go.

40 minutes working is basically my max.

♪ ♪

So every day, I get a little weaker.

♪ ♪

But right here, right here...

I can push with that.

♪ ♪

Ow. What the heck?

♪ ♪

[grunts]

Hey!

♪ ♪

What are you doing?

♪ ♪

[grunts]

Yeah, take that.

♪ ♪

Ah! Boom!

Ahh!

♪ ♪

[laughs]

I'm still just a kid.

I'm just a kid in an older body, that's all,

but I can't be wasting calories just having fun.

But why not?

I mean, all of this is fun, but now, we have snow,

and my food procurement is going down,

and if that's going down and not increasing,

my time out here is getting shorter.

♪ ♪

So I decided I'm going to go see

if I can roust up a squirrel.

So I'm just gonna walk the edge of the east woods

where I have my traps, and maybe I can uncover a trap,

and who knows?

I might have a frozen squirrel under the snow or something.

♪ ♪

Winter is a good time for dreaming things in.

There's so many possibilities

that I'm really looking forward to.

I want to open a wilderness school.

That's been my plan for years and years and years.

So this spring,

I jumped way out on a limb financially.

I got the financing, and I bought a piece of property.

It's a beautiful piece of land, 13 acres,

and I will be taking down my yurt that I live in now

and moving everything to the land,

and my plan is my yurt

will become an indoor classroom,

and then I have the opportunity

to build my dream home,

and I can do whatever I want.

This will be the first time that I've

had my own home since I left

when I was 18 to go to college.

So 40 years, that's huge.

♪ ♪

I've been really resisting this elderhood,

but now I feel like I'm ready to build my first real home.

♪ ♪

Now I gotta pay for it. [laughs]

Half a million dollars would enable me to pay off my land

and step into a new beginning...

♪ ♪

So I can't give up.

I can't quit trying.

♪ ♪

Oh, oh, this is so awesome.

Oh, my gosh.

[Chuckles]

♪ ♪

Check it out.

Bunny tracks!

They go off into the abyss.

♪ ♪

Need to figure out where he's going.

Game on.

♪ ♪

So many places where a hare could hide out.

♪ ♪

It's starting to snow again.

♪ ♪

Oh, there's a squirrel.

[Tense music]

♪ ♪

Where'd it go?

♪ ♪

Let me get him up there.

♪ ♪

[dramatic music]

♪ ♪

[bleep], so close.

That definitely was a hard shot.

Surprised I took it.

The longer I stay out here,

the weaker my muscles are getting,

and it's getting colder.

I have to wear more layers of clothes,

and it's really affecting how I pull my bow.

I know that I can only take shots at a close proximity.

When you take a shot, you want it to be fatal.

You don't want to wound an animal.

♪ ♪

Ooh.

Wow, it's really hard.

Oh, my gosh.

♪ ♪

I just don't feel as old as I am.

Most of my friends are younger than me and very active,

and I'm very active,

so I've been really resisting this elderhood.

Man, that arrow just disappeared.

Ugh, where'd it go?

Maybe it's over here.

I don't know.

OK, Karie, don't do that anymore.

That squirrel is so onto me.

Surprised he showed himself.

My tummy hurts.

I was hoping to get something today.

[Sighs]

[Tense music]

♪ ♪

Really so hard.

It's, like, snow and cold and ice.

And now having rain.

I feel hungry and stuck in one spot.

And now, all these cycles...

are destroying my tarp. [chuckles]

This is what happens.

There's ice at the top of the trees,

and then, there's wind,

then all the ice starts coming down,

and they fall on my tarp,

and they make holes.

Let me show you.

So that's one hole that happened last night,

that big, big hole.

That's something I need to work on.

[Chuckles]

♪ ♪

Well, I can get one and a half fingers in there.

Heat will escape from there, so I'm going to sew a patch.

♪ ♪

When I was coming out, I told my partner,

"I just need not to screw up.

As long as I do not mess up, I got this."

♪ ♪

Helping her is such a powerful motivation for me.

I like to model resilience for her.

I'm separating some cord

to use as thread.

My strategy is to hunker down more into my shelter

because I'm going to do what real people do

in survival situations,

and it's either they walk out, or they hunker down.

My body is gonna have to understand

that I'm going to go to this place,

but it's all a big bet.

♪ ♪

So for the patch,

I'm going to use this piece of tarp

that I cut for the windows and for the stove pipe.

[laughs]

It's a rough, rough patch, as you can see.

[laughs]

It looks like a five-year-old did it.

But it's not easy when you're...

Like, you've been starving for so long, and you're surviving,

and you're sewing from one side,

and you cannot sew from the other.

You're not using a proper needle.

So that's that stuff.

But it's what I signed up for.

[Tense music]

♪ ♪

All right, let's get some water.

I think this is the weakest I've felt right now.

That's not good.

♪ ♪

Let's see how frozen we are.

♪ ♪

[pounding]

♪ ♪

Yeah, I can still get through.

Easy does it.

♪ ♪

Oh.

That was close.

♪ ♪

That's as fast as I can go.

♪ ♪

There we go.

Just walking to get water is a lot for me.

[Sighs] But, dang, that was a good sleep last night.

My last thoughts were seeing my mom's face at the airport.

Holding her for the first time

and just giving her those big old kisses on the cheeks.

That gave me just a bunch of clarity,

and I just slept through the night.

You know, how much...

How much is enough?

I think everyone's asking that question.

For me, I want my mom to be inspired by this.

I want it to hit her right here

and have her just smile and cry.

♪ ♪

I felt joy here in the beauty of this land,

in the freedom and the endless learning.

Life is just better being surrounded

by people who love you,

and, Mom, you deserve that, too.

♪ ♪

'Cause you're a beautiful, amazing, wonderful woman,

and you deserve to be happy,

and I know you've felt all alone, but you're not.

That I promise you.

♪ ♪

So...

Operation Save Mom is a go as of today.

I'm excited to be a better son to you.

Yeah.

[Chuckles]

Do you know what?

♪ ♪

I think I have one more trick up my sleeve.

♪ ♪

I think I have one more good idea.

♪ ♪

I'm gonna show you.

[Dramatic music]

♪ ♪

I got one last surprise for you guys...

one last trick up my sleeve,

one last good idea.

For the Canadian Grenadier Guards,

this one's for you guys.

At the age of 17, I had no idea what I wanted to do.

Tarp, I need you.

You have been a lifesaver.

So I was walking on St. Catherine in Montreal,

and I remember just having an urge to just look up,

and I see this statue,

big, old lion, unicorn with a shield

plated right in the middle.

Just zigzagging paracord.

I just thought to myself,

"I really wanna help people."

Get up there.

Turns out, that statue was the Canadian coat of arms.

Flag... You gotta put the flag on this.

It was a calling.

That was the start of the journey.

And then I joined the army and just been walking a path

towards finding out who I need to help and how.

Now, you are complete, sled, to get me out of here.

♪ ♪

I'm declining at a rapid rate

each and every day.

Let's see.

♪ ♪

Half a million dollars, that's pretty juicy,

but my options are to leave strong

or to leave broken,

so I'm gonna walk out of here.

Ain't nobody carrying my kit for me,

and I don't want my mom to see me suffer.

Ah.

One last push, baby.

Leaving standing tall, I think that's

what my mom needs to see.

[Grunts]

Let's go!

♪ ♪

Ugh!

♪ ♪

Yeah!

I have a long life ahead of me,

and now, I have such clarity in who I am...

Yeah.

What I'm meant to do in this Earth...

It's working.

And who I want by my side.

♪ ♪

[phone beeping]

This is Teimojin.

I am officially tapping out.

♪ ♪

All right, let's go home.

♪ ♪

I've won.

This is a victory for me.

♪ ♪

My body has reached a limit,

and I'm here to take care of my mom,

to inspire her.

I think this is how I want my story to end,

and I think she'll be proud of how much I pushed.

This is going to show her the strength that she needs.

Not me being carried out.

[Somber music]

♪ ♪

When I first got the call

that I would be on this show...

♪ ♪

I wanted to have fun.

I wanted it to be about testing myself, my skills,

and it was only when I got here,

reflected on my life, who I am, who I want to be

where I realized

that it can't be about me.

I've been selfish for so long and so focused

on this one goal, to become a doctor,

that I let everyone around me down.

So when I get home, one of the first things

is to say sorry for being absent.

♪ ♪

Now, I feel 100% me,

but renewed, reborn,

and after this, I can see myself just being

filled with joy and love,

and that's just worth so much more

than a half a million dollars.

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

Today is toque time

and maybe have warm tea.

That would be nice.

So I'm just gonna grab some water.

♪ ♪

And you can see, the river is all slush.

♪ ♪

Not good for ice fishing. Not good for walking.

Whoa.

♪ ♪

It's quite icy, like, super icy,

and my boots are not super grippy.

♪ ♪

Here.

[Chuckles]

Ready for the fire in my stove.

I can see this cold really wearing down people,

but I've been waiting for this moment

for, like, 70 days.

This huge mental strategy

that I'm using that I believe it's very important

is I'm trying to punctuate my adventure

and have different, like, milestones.

I do this milestone, and I get this reward,

and it helps me have something I look forward to

and also, it just changes the monotony.

This is the way to cut firewood.

Mallet.

My ax.

In terms of safety, I am textbook perfect almost.

♪ ♪

First fire.

[Chuckles]

This is sweet, sweet.

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

I would not be here for just, like, oh, yeah,

I'm gonna be in a TV show.

I'm here because I feel I can win this.

I've invested so much energy,

so much passion, so much soul.

I've invested my health.

I want some money to really start

going after my dream of having

a homestead and a community

and to start a family and to marry.

♪ ♪

That's why I'm here.

Holy [bleep].

♪ ♪

I used paint cans.

I should have known better.

There's some weird smell from, like,

whatever was in these cans.

♪ ♪

It's likely that it's toxic.

Such a dummy mistake.

I'm going to open the door for a little bit.

♪ ♪

It's a smell that you know is just not good for you.

It makes my head hurt.

So bad, oh.

I am a little bit pissed.

It's something that I was really looking forward to.

Like, what the [bleep]?

Really makes this struggle harder.

[Bleep] I feel sick.

[Dramatic music]

♪ ♪

The problem with my stove is that I used paint cans,

and they had lots of paint still,

and it just doesn't burn off.

So I'm gonna redo

almost entirely the stove

with some cans that I saved just in case I needed them.

I have to work with mud.

I can actually use mud from the sides of the stove.

It's moist. It's not completely frozen.

The risk is I [bleep] up, and then I don't have a stove,

but the reward is worth the risk.

♪ ♪

Let's do it. There's no going back.

Here we go.

It's a big job because there's lots

of thinking, lots of things that need to go right.

There's many moving parts.

♪ ♪

It's gonna be a challenge.

♪ ♪

I removed this front piece.

I don't know if you can see all this,

like, paint, but it smells very bad.

♪ ♪

But this is a new can I can use.

♪ ♪

Have to warm it up in my hand.

♪ ♪

That's it.

The previous week, I was really, really

missing family and friends and my partner Jennifer.

♪ ♪

She's, like, my best friend.

My life gravitates around her,

so it's hard to be without her.

♪ ♪

I have exciting plans

for when I get back with my partner.

♪ ♪

It's working.

My frankenstove is alive.

It's alive! [chuckles]

♪ ♪

I'm really satisfied with my decision.

It was a risk, but the universe came together.

♪ ♪

This is a natural smoke.

It doesn't feel like any kind of plastic or garbage

or anything like that.

A new stove that doesn't smell.

Sweet.

♪ ♪

Mmm.

Nice, warm water.

Here, I have some fruit leather.

I can't eat too much of it at one time...

'cause that gives me a tummy ache.

And so I'm grabbing my bow,

and I'm gonna go get some alternative sources of food

so I don't have to eat this.

[laughs]

Hello!

[laughs]

♪ ♪

Oh, my gosh.

Snowshoe hare tracks. Oh, my gosh.

There's a bit of movement.

♪ ♪

The problem is, I don't even know if I can pull my bow.

♪ ♪

Ah. [Chuckles]

♪ ♪

All right.

♪ ♪

Don't cry. Don't cry.

Stay positive.

♪ ♪

I'm just having a hard time.

But I was starting to remember the layers

of why I came out here.

I'm dedicating my experience and my time

for those people who want to be here

and for whatever reason can't.

♪ ♪

I'm here for my dear friend, Collette, who has cancer,

and she wants to live out her days in nature,

and she can't.

She asked me if I would dedicate my journey to her,

and I was like, "Sure."

And so I asked her, "Well, what happens

if you leave before I get back?"

And her answer was like, "My goal is to live

long enough to watch you on TV."

That's huge for somebody

to say that to you.

So she's inspiring me at the same time

to keep going, to keep living out here.

♪ ♪

You know, if she can stomach the radiation

and the chemotherapy and all the crap

that she has to go through to live,

I can stomach this fruit leather, you know?

♪ ♪

So here's to you, Collette.

♪ ♪

Thank you for inspiring me and keeping me going,

and I hope I'm keeping you going.

♪ ♪

[sighs] I'm feeling it.

Feeling it right now.

♪ ♪

[dramatic music]

♪ ♪

I really hope so.

I hope it's a polar bear, man.

I hope so. I see some stuff in the distance.

[Bleep], I hope so, man.

Ah. See?

I've never seen a polar bear up close,

but it's not up close.

It's so far away.

That's not it.

Where are you?

Are you serious?

You know what, it's the second time

this happens to me.

It happened to me on another trip.

I think I see polar bears.

Nope.

I wish it had been a polar bear.

Would have been the fricking highlight

of my challenge, for sure.

♪ ♪

[chuckles]

I'm gonna go get some alder

so that I can make some snow skis,

and the only alder that I see that's not, like,

totally collapsed over is this little group

right back there.

I really wanna go tracking in this fresh new snow,

find some snowshoe hares, find some food,

so I'm gonna make some snow skis

so I can stay on top of the snow.

♪ ♪

Here's a third of the load.

It's not so heavy.

It's just hard getting up there.

♪ ♪

So I've been just questioning of where I'm at.

Like, am I done?

How far do I want to push my body?

I don't feel like I'm done,

but I feel like I'm close,

like it's the beginning of the end.

♪ ♪

So I've got a decision to make.

Am I just gonna hunker down and conserve my energy

and live out my days until I'm done?

Or I can push myself

and go out and get food.

OK, oh, my gosh.

I think that's it. Whew.

My fingertips are cold.

So I think I am going to... Whew...

Start a fire,

and I'll sit in my doorway

and peel the bark off, keep my hands warm.

I'm gonna make some skis and venture out

and just do what I can do.

My body will tell me when I'm done.

♪ ♪

Nothing like straight ice cold water

to start your day.

♪ ♪

Seriously, like, now, my body and my mind

is just like, "Yeah, just another day at the office."

♪ ♪

Man.

This is my life now.

♪ ♪

I get water, and then I do nothing.

♪ ♪

I think I'm on a sustainable path,

but at night, you can really feel the hunger pangs.

[Burps]

♪ ♪

It's just cold today,

and I am having trouble staying warm,

but I have decided that I'm back in the game.

I am not thinking about tapping out.

♪ ♪

I have recommitted myself.

I hope to have these skis done tomorrow.

Gonna go tracking, see what I can find.

So glad I came to my senses.

You know, I wanna stay out here and rough it.

[laughs]

That's what I came here to do.

[Chuckles]

♪ ♪

Oh, my back. I'm like an old man.

Too much standing up, too much blah, blah, blah.

♪ ♪

Oh.

Going out.

I'm being sloppy.

♪ ♪

I can't let that go out

because I worked so hard for it.

[Blowing]

It's freezing, and trying to sustain a fire all the time,

all that effort has been quite a drain.

Ehh. Wow.

That was so freaking close, man.

♪ ♪

I need to focus.

♪ ♪

[sighs]

Oh, um...

Yeah, I'm tired. I'm tired today.

I may... may make some tea and go back to bed.

And that's OK. It's OK.

Got time.

♪ ♪

Definitely reached the part of my journey

when I'm just, like, a little bit

ooh, hoo, hoo. [chuckles]

Cuckoo.

[Chuckles]

I don't really give a [bleep] about anything.

[laughs]

Cuckoo. Cuckoo.

♪ ♪

[bleep], I'm going crazy.

♪ ♪

So I didn't get much done on the skis.

That takes energy.

I think I'm gonna take today moment by moment.

♪ ♪

Yeah.

♪ ♪

I'm prepared for full starvation, so...

♪ ♪

I still feel that there's a long time to go.

♪ ♪

I'm afraid that my body will deteriorate

without vitamins and minerals.

♪ ♪

Oh, ow, ow, ow.

Every joint in my body hurts.

♪ ♪

Oh, been tossing and turning all night.

♪ ♪

There's just not enough fat

on my body to cushion the joints.

♪ ♪

I'm not down for the count yet.

I'll feel better.

♪ ♪

What... why am I even recording?

It's, like...

♪ ♪

12:15 at night.

Just go to bed.

♪ ♪

What am I doing with my life?

♪ ♪

No, it's not nighttime yet,

but I'm in my shelter.

♪ ♪

Having trouble staying warm,

and mostly because I'm just not very active today.

Today's been kind of a down day.

♪ ♪

[fire crackling]

[Dramatic music]

♪ ♪

Oh, there's a mouse there.

Oh, guacamole.

[Bleep], that's funny.

♪ ♪

I am lower in weight, and I haven't been eating,

so I'm sure my blood pressure is low.

♪ ♪

This has been an ordeal, but at the same time,

it's such a blur, man, such a blur.

♪ ♪

So I'm kind of thinking that I should go for a walk

because I haven't had a walk for a long time.

♪ ♪

After that, I think I'm gonna be mentally much better.

I really wanna walk over the ice.

I waited so long for this moment.

♪ ♪

And ever since day zero, I wanted to go on the ice.

It's just like a mental liberation of, like,

now that there's ice, I feel that I have legs again

because when you have ice, walking is so easy.

♪ ♪

This is the neat thing about having an ice chisel

like this, is can go walk.

And then you just...

push like that, and if the ice

was thin, very thin,

just the likelihood

that you would feel something.

This is a natural way to be

in the wilderness on the ice.

♪ ♪

I'm so emotional lately.

It's probably so many things...

♪ ♪

Starving...

being without people.

♪ ♪

I just keep thinking,

"I'm so thankful for Jennifer."

♪ ♪

Being in survival mode amplifies

the need for family and friends

and the importance of that.

♪ ♪

I think I'm gonna propose after I get back.

I think it's time.

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

[tense music]

♪ ♪

Whew.

[Chuckles]

It is a blanket of snow.

Oh, my gosh.

Whoa.

Crazy.

And it's blistery cold.

♪ ♪

Wow.

Which is awesome.

Look, there's a cornice.

Wow, it was windy.

♪ ♪

And...

My spirits are good.

My body's tired.

I didn't sleep half the night.

I was feeling queasy.

I'm actually feeling lightheaded right now.

I can go look for animal tracks.

It take so much energy,

and my quads don't really wanna do much.

Oh, I just all of a sudden wanna cry.

[Sighs]

I don't know where that came up all of a sudden.

[Sighs]

♪ ♪

Guess I'll just be with it for a moment.

♪ ♪

[exhales]

♪ ♪

[sniffles, crying]

♪ ♪

Sorry. Here I go again.

♪ ♪

I'll be right back.

♪ ♪

So I set out...

To do my dream.

And it took me a lot to get here.

♪ ♪

I mean, years, years.

But my dream isn't all about to be on the show.

My dream is a lot deeper than that,

and I wanted it to come to fruition

and have that completion in my heart and completion

in my being to say,

"OK. It's OK. I've done it.

And to... [crying]

Gosh darn it.

♪ ♪

Maybe I'm done today. [laughs]

No, I'm not done today. I'm not.

♪ ♪

Anyway, I'm...

♪ ♪

I'm close.

And I'm still gonna stay here for a little while.

♪ ♪

So, wow.

I was just gonna do a quick morning check-in.

[laughs] And I just spilled my guts out.

Whew, OK, I'm going to get my fire going

and drink some tea.

Maybe I'll take a nap.

[Chuckles]

Ohh.

I love it here.

[Dramatic music]

♪ ♪

Oh, man.

Last night, I had a dream where a friend of mine

gave me this bowl of fruit.

And lucidly woke up for a moment like,

"No, no, no, go back and enjoy that fruit.

"Just enjoy that.

Enjoy it. It's OK."

Then I realized, like, "Wow,

I'm actually craving healthy food."

[Chuckles]

I just wanna nurture my body back to health.

I mean, here's my bow.

And...

[grunts]

I can't really kill anything like that.

I can't even pull it.

I can't even take an aim.

And so I can't even get any food.

♪ ♪

[sighs]

♪ ♪

[exhales]

♪ ♪

It's just time to take care of myself.

♪ ♪

[crying]

I'm going to.

♪ ♪

I know this is the right thing.

♪ ♪

OK, push it, Karie, push it.

It's so hard.

♪ ♪

[chuckles] [phone beeping]

Hi, this is Karie Lee.

I am officially tapping out.

♪ ♪

[sighs]

♪ ♪

The last 2 and 1/2 months has been pretty amazing,

and...

I'm gonna remember it for the rest of my life.

♪ ♪

Ohh.

I'm just so blessed by this land...

[hopeful music]

And the fish that fed me,

and the squirrels that fed me, and the muskrat,

that was such a... such a gift.

[Kisses]

♪ ♪

I can hear the helicopter coming.

[Helicopter whirring]

♪ ♪

Oh, my God, my heart's just beating so fast.

[Chuckles]

I get to go home.

♪ ♪

Hi.

I'm just done.

I know my body is done.

It's a hard decision to leave.

I did my dream here, and now,

I'm ready for the next dream.

It's time to step into that elderhood

and just be there for the people that need me,

my friends and my family.

♪ ♪

I wanted to have this experience

of being perfectly comfortable

in my shelter, warm, with a plate of food.

So I asked myself,

"Is this fulfilling my childhood dream?"

And the answer is yes.

But this experience, I feel,

has been a rite of passage.

I've been really resisting this elderhood,

and now, I feel like I'm ready to accept

the fact that I am an elder.

♪ ♪

And I feel I have a lot to share.

I feel like I'm ready to use my voice.

So I don't feel like I lost.

I may not be rich financially, but I feel like

I'm coming home with a lot of wisdom.

♪ ♪

My body right now is asking for a day of full recovery

of just sleep.

You don't even have to go for water.

Get dehydrated for a bit.

It's fine.

So I think I'm gonna sleep in a little bit right now.

[Phone beeping]

[Bleep]

Would be [bleep] the day that I'm dehydrated, man.

[Bleep]. Seriously.

[Bleep], right before the med check.

Well, my blood is gonna pump pretty fast now.

[Bleep] going down.

Medcheck in one hour.

OK, let's rumble.

[Bleep], [bleep].

OK, hydrate.

♪ ♪

Ah.

This water is hard to drink.

♪ ♪

Gonna make a fire.

If I can warm water, I can drink it fricking fast.

♪ ♪

I can get a fire going in no time if I need to.

♪ ♪

Well, here's the chopper.

♪ ♪

I think I've downed how much?

Three liters?

♪ ♪

When you're walking on this thin line,

you need to be fully engaged for the experience.

♪ ♪

And if you're not, you're not gonna match the struggle.

♪ ♪

This point is beautiful because you're so present.

You don't even have a concept of time.

♪ ♪

I can't let them pull me out.

Juan Pablo, how are you feeling

since the last time we saw you?

I'm so engaged with the situation.

Like, these wintry scenes are so...

They're so similar to where I live with my partner.

I've started to feel like home,

and with the ice,

I just walked and I enjoyed the view

from a different perspective that I hadn't had.

I just thought of my partner

and got a little bit emotional.

Just that I was waiting so long...

To go on the ice.

Since that... since day zero, I've had this plan of, like,

I'm gonna go on the ice...

and...

♪ ♪

You won!

♪ ♪

[dramatic music]

♪ ♪

[laughs]

♪ ♪

It's just... It's hitting me slowly.

- [laughs] - Like...

- Yeah. - Thank you.

- I'm so glad they brought you! - I know!

- I look what? - You look good.

[laughs]

Thanks.

I'm so glad you're here.

♪ ♪

We can go see some polar bears. - You saw a polar bear?

I thought I saw one, just like on our canoe trip.

- Oh, my gosh. - Like, it was the same thing.

- Oh, no. - Seriously.

I can't believe you did this.

You're amazing. - Thank you.

And it's so beautiful here.

Yeah, it is beautiful.

Do you wanna see my shelter?

- Yeah, yeah. - Let's go.

Oh, wow.

This is so nice.

[laughs]

When you're isolated, all this longing

for your family and your friends

just intensifies so much.

It was hard to turn that off.

It's not super cozy. - Yeah, it is.

Well, spend, like, 70 something days in here,

and you'll see that it's not that comfy.

♪ ♪

I just feel so happy that Jennifer is here.

♪ ♪

[laughs]

Such an amazing day.

♪ ♪

I still cannot believe I won half a million dollars.

♪ ♪

I am so excited.

We can fulfill our dreams.

It feels so liberating.

♪ ♪

Jennifer is an amazing person.

She's everything to me.

I don't know when I'm gonna propose to her,

but I need to plan something

that will make her feel special.

This was my goal, right? - Mm-hmm.

Every day, I mark to here.

This was very important, I think...

For my mind...

just to see the progress. - Mm-hmm.

I was prepared to just...

go for it, no matter what, you know?

Mm-hmm.

I feel that many people nowadays

need more resilience.

I take it as a personal mission

to be resilient.

There was a lot of heart

that I put into this, a lot of heart.

I'm just a survival nerd, you know?

♪ ♪

My biggest takeaway from this experience

is that your soul matters,

having a strong mission in life matters,

and that your life experience really matters.

♪ ♪

78 days is something I can be proud of.

♪ ♪

I just feel like I've achieved something

that I worked so hard to achieve.

♪ ♪

It feels really good to break barriers

and be the first Latino to win "Alone".

♪ ♪

It's awesome that it doesn't matter

where you come from, as long as you are passionate enough.

You can be better than anyone else

if you are obsessed like I am.

♪ ♪

It's not easy, but it's possible.

♪ ♪

[dramatic music]

♪ ♪

I'll give you that last 10%.

I'll show you how I'm gonna do it.

♪ ♪

Gonna walk out tall, proud,

and walk out whole.

I have thought about family for a long time.

My grandfather would understand

so many things about this;

The hunger, the self-doubt,

and the unexpected successes.

♪ ♪

We gotta put the flag on this.

My grandfather has experienced civil war.

He's known starvation at a young, young age.

Sled to get me out of here.

I understand a lot of what he does on a daily basis

a lot better.

Let's see.

The moments that he's just staring off,

and I understand his relationship with food now.

♪ ♪

Let's go home proud.

Let's go home strong.

♪ ♪

[grunts]

♪ ♪

One last push, baby.

[Grunts]

Let's go!

[Groans]

Let's go home walking on our own two feet.

♪ ♪

Yeah.

I've already won.

That's how this feels.

It's working.

[Steady beeping]

[Dramatic music]

Fight for your happiness.

Fight for your passions.

Fight for someone you love.

It'll always be worth it.

Fill your heart

with strength

and joy

and peace!

♪ ♪

This whole challenge was nothing like I expected.

I dropped...

and everything changed.

The reason why I was here changed,

and having a deeper purpose, that meant the world to me.

And I think my relationships with everyone in my life

is just different now.

We have something for you.

Oh, my God.

Thank you.

[Dramatic music]

Oh, thank you.

[Indistinct speech]

♪ ♪

Oh, that salty goodness.

♪ ♪

I'll miss the freedom,

the infinite lessons,

and just the joy of

finding happiness in the smallest things,

whether it's a fish the size of your hand,

or...

just the right snowfall,

or a squirrel.

♪ ♪

I've been out here for 63 days and...

received so much more than I gave.

I just feel so lucky

to have done this experience

and to have...

had no input in how it was gonna pan out.

And have it pan out like this?

I have such clarity in who I am,

what I'm meant to do in this Earth.

♪ ♪

And who I want by my side.

After this,

I think I'm just gonna be

just so much more open about every little thing.

I think my relationships are gonna be deeper,

profound, and...

my mission clear.

So...

let's change the world, just a little bit.

♪ ♪

[dramatic music]

♪ ♪

My body's not producing a lot of heat.

I've lost a lot of weight.

My body's done...

♪ ♪

And I've given it all I can.

So I might as well move on and take care of myself.

[Soft dramatic music]

♪ ♪

You know, I promised myself before I left,

because I'm older,

that I didn't need to push myself to the extremes

that some younger people might do and...

And so it's painful.

Like, I can't even really go hunting

so getting food is just not really an option.

And I'm just starving myself more

and depleting my body more for no reason.

I mean, yeah, it gets me a few more days on the...

The check card. [chuckles]

On the game board.

But I just don't wanna do that to my body anymore.

You know?

[Soft resonant music]

This place here?

Oh, my God.

♪ ♪

[sighs]

♪ ♪

It's been my home for the last two and a half months.

♪ ♪

I'm so grateful from the bottom of my heart

for everything that I've learned here

and everything I've received.

♪ ♪

[sniffles]

All the blessings, just...

Thank you, thank you, thank you.

Need to take my mittens off. [chuckles]

♪ ♪

Aww, thank you.

My hands are numb. [sighs]

I've been dreaming about this for days.

Oh, gosh.

♪ ♪

Mmm!

Oh, my God.

[Sighs]

♪ ♪

[soft determined music]

♪ ♪

It's hard for me to let go.

♪ ♪

'Cause this is my home.

I just absolutely love it here and I don't want to go,

but I know I need to.

♪ ♪

And this journey, it gave me confidence

because wilderness survival is not just about the skills;

It's about the attitude, the positive mindset.

Being in a place of gratitude, it felt like I was being

nurtured and held out there with the land

and I feel that was a big part of why,

even though my body's tired,

my energy level was pretty high most of the time.

♪ ♪

So I don't feel disappointed or embarrassed

or that it's a failure

because it was an experiment.

♪ ♪

And that's part of why I wanted to see

how deep I could go

because I wanna turn around and share that experience

of what I learned out there.

♪ ♪

When I get home, I am going to take it easy

and I really want to spend my evenings

having dinner with my friends,

and not isolate myself so much.

I'm ready to move on

to the next adventure of my life.

♪ ♪

[dramatic music]

♪ ♪

With the ice, I just walked and enjoy the view.

I... I just thought of my partner

and got a little bit emotional.

Just that, since day zero, I had this plan of, like,

I'm gonna go in the ice...

and...

[laughs]

[Crying, laughing]

♪ ♪

Baby.

♪ ♪

I'm so glad they brought you!

- [laughs] - [inaudible]

♪ ♪

You're amazing.

Thank you.

I know. It's just, like...

It's hitting me slowly, OK?

Like, it's a shock. It's great.

- Your shelter looks awesome. - Yeah, I want to...

I want to show you my shelter so bad.

And it's so beautiful here.

Yeah, it is beautiful.

This is so nice.

[laughs]

I'm so glad to show her my shelter and just, like,

to show her where I spent, like, 70-plus days.

By the way, we never speak in English...

- [laughs] - So it's a bit odd.

♪ ♪

[laughs]

Wow, that's so cool.

So see how it fits there?

And then this is the door.

Wow.

And then, yeah, these are all cans.

And this is a can over here too.

Oh, my gosh.

I just feel so happy that Jennifer is here.

♪ ♪

[laughs]

Such an amazing day.

♪ ♪

We can go on the ice.

Yeah, let's go.

It's slowly sinking in.

I still cannot believe I won half a million dollars.

It's kind of nice to show the world

that I'm freaking tough.

- No. - No?

I drank three liters in one hour.

Oh. No, it's fine.

Not right now. I'm good.

OK.

Like, I'm good.

[laughter]

Let's go on the ice.

♪ ♪

I'm the first Latino to win "Alone."

It feels good.

I'm an urban person.

I'm from, like,

a 4-million people city in Mexico.

That's where I was born.

And I think it's pretty cool that you can show people

that you can come from any background.

And if you are passionate enough,

you can accomplish a lot.

I know! [Laughs]

It was so hard, right?

It was hard, but it's such a blur.

It's such a blur.

♪ ♪

I just feel like I've achieved something

that I worked so hard to achieve.

♪ ♪

I just felt, like, possessed by this dream

of, like, I need to win "Alone,"

so I'm gonna do it no matter what.

Sometimes, I can be so task-orientated.

But there was a lot of heart,

a lot of heart I put into this.

[Helicopter whirring]

I got the perfect closure for this journey.

I think I progressed on my next stage,

from not caring what people think about me

to... just being more open

about showing my emotions.

♪ ♪

Jennifer is an amazing person.

We've done so many adventures together.

And now, we can fulfill our dreams.

I'm really excited to start this new chapter in my life.