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1
00:00:10,470 --> 00:00:11,562
Okay, everyone.
2
00:00:11,637 --> 00:00:14,936
Unfortunately, the government
just passed a new law.
3
00:00:15,007 --> 00:00:17,737
Starting today all park
employees must pass an annual
4
00:00:17,810 --> 00:00:20,176
fitness test in order
to keep their jobs.
5
00:00:22,115 --> 00:00:23,412
I know. I know.
6
00:00:23,483 --> 00:00:25,178
I don't want to be here
any more than you do.
7
00:00:25,251 --> 00:00:28,186
So let's get this over with
so we can get back to work.
8
00:00:33,254 --> 00:00:40,146
Ripped By mstoll
9
00:01:00,720 --> 00:01:01,652
All right, guys.
10
00:01:01,721 --> 00:01:02,915
Last part of the test.
11
00:01:02,989 --> 00:01:05,014
Just do one pull-up,
and we can get out of here.
12
00:01:05,091 --> 00:01:06,058
Hup!
13
00:01:07,026 --> 00:01:10,223
Dude, this test
was so easy.
14
00:01:10,296 --> 00:01:11,194
I know, right?
15
00:01:11,264 --> 00:01:12,424
What a waste of time.
16
00:01:12,498 --> 00:01:13,965
You want to go play some
video games after this?
17
00:01:14,033 --> 00:01:15,728
Ye-e-ah, I do!
18
00:01:15,802 --> 00:01:16,791
Mordecai! Rigby!
19
00:01:16,869 --> 00:01:18,427
Quit talking and
get on the bar!
20
00:01:18,504 --> 00:01:21,064
See you on the other side.
21
00:01:21,140 --> 00:01:22,368
Boom!
22
00:01:24,577 --> 00:01:28,809
Time to show all you chumps how
to do a pull-up like a real man!
23
00:01:34,821 --> 00:01:35,651
Whomp-whomp!
24
00:01:35,721 --> 00:01:38,155
Wh-whomp... who-o-mp!
25
00:01:38,224 --> 00:01:39,156
Stop talking!
26
00:01:39,225 --> 00:01:40,283
Come on, dude!
27
00:01:40,359 --> 00:01:42,156
Quit messing around
and just do the pull-up.
28
00:01:42,228 --> 00:01:43,718
I'm trying!
29
00:01:45,731 --> 00:01:47,028
Oof!
30
00:01:48,835 --> 00:01:49,927
Oh, man!
31
00:01:50,002 --> 00:01:51,902
You can't even do
one pull-up?
32
00:01:51,971 --> 00:01:52,995
Yes, I can!
33
00:01:53,072 --> 00:01:54,061
It was only because
you distracted me
34
00:01:54,140 --> 00:01:55,630
with that stupid noise!
35
00:01:55,708 --> 00:01:58,734
Oh, so it was the noise's fault
that you can't do a pull-up.
36
00:01:58,811 --> 00:01:59,675
Is that it?
37
00:01:59,745 --> 00:02:00,575
Yes! Yes!
38
00:02:00,646 --> 00:02:01,670
It was that stupid noise!
39
00:02:01,747 --> 00:02:03,715
Fine.
Then go again.
40
00:02:03,783 --> 00:02:05,148
Don't make that noise again!
41
00:02:05,218 --> 00:02:06,082
I won't.
42
00:02:06,152 --> 00:02:07,779
I promise.
43
00:02:07,854 --> 00:02:10,414
Whomp-whomp! Wh-who-o-mp!
44
00:02:13,025 --> 00:02:14,356
Cool it, Muscle Man.
45
00:02:14,427 --> 00:02:16,361
Let's go, Rigby.
Just do the pull-up.
46
00:02:24,537 --> 00:02:26,368
Oh, how embarrassing!
47
00:02:26,439 --> 00:02:27,599
Dude, come on!
48
00:02:37,049 --> 00:02:38,175
Oh, man!
49
00:02:38,251 --> 00:02:40,583
He can't even do one pull-up!
50
00:02:40,653 --> 00:02:42,245
I'm sorry Rigby,
but I can't give
51
00:02:42,321 --> 00:02:44,312
you a passing grade
on the test.
52
00:02:44,390 --> 00:02:46,654
If you can't do a pull-up
by the end of the week,
53
00:02:46,726 --> 00:02:48,284
I'm gonna have
to fire you.
54
00:02:48,361 --> 00:02:49,350
But...
55
00:02:49,428 --> 00:02:51,760
Whatever, I was just tired!
56
00:02:51,831 --> 00:02:53,059
I'll be able to do a pull-up.
57
00:02:53,132 --> 00:02:54,292
You'll see.
58
00:02:56,035 --> 00:02:58,469
Time to warm up
with some gym class.
59
00:02:58,538 --> 00:03:01,200
"Because you know it's
better than the real thing."
60
00:03:03,376 --> 00:03:04,570
Dude, what are you doing?
61
00:03:04,644 --> 00:03:05,975
What does it look like?
62
00:03:06,045 --> 00:03:07,910
I'm training
to do a pull-up.
63
00:03:07,980 --> 00:03:09,777
Dude, that's not
doing anything!
64
00:03:09,849 --> 00:03:11,180
If it's not doing anything,
65
00:03:11,250 --> 00:03:13,150
then how come I'm already
breaking a sweat?
66
00:03:13,219 --> 00:03:14,516
Um, I don't know.
67
00:03:14,587 --> 00:03:16,054
Maybe because you're
really out of shape?
68
00:03:16,122 --> 00:03:17,714
Does this look like
I'm out of shape?
69
00:03:20,293 --> 00:03:23,285
Whoo-hoo! Whoo!
70
00:03:26,732 --> 00:03:29,292
Carbo-loading!!
71
00:03:29,368 --> 00:03:31,700
Rigby, you got to
take this seriously!
72
00:03:31,771 --> 00:03:33,136
Oh, I got to take
it seriously?
73
00:03:33,205 --> 00:03:34,832
Is this serious
enough for you?
74
00:03:34,907 --> 00:03:36,898
Benson, I'm ready
to do my pull-up now.
75
00:03:38,411 --> 00:03:39,435
All right.
76
00:03:39,512 --> 00:03:40,911
Let's get this over with.
77
00:03:40,980 --> 00:03:44,609
Here's how we do it
in gym class, losers.
78
00:03:45,451 --> 00:03:46,281
Well?
79
00:03:46,352 --> 00:03:47,182
I'm trying!
80
00:03:51,724 --> 00:03:52,588
Come on, Rigby.
81
00:03:52,658 --> 00:03:53,750
Just get it over with.
82
00:03:58,297 --> 00:04:00,265
You have until Friday.
83
00:04:02,935 --> 00:04:04,368
Hey, Rigby.
84
00:04:04,437 --> 00:04:06,405
Is anything wrong?
85
00:04:06,472 --> 00:04:07,666
No. I'm fine.
86
00:04:07,740 --> 00:04:09,230
Are you upset 'cause you
can't do a pull-up
87
00:04:09,308 --> 00:04:10,798
and you might get fired?
88
00:04:10,876 --> 00:04:12,366
What?! Who told you that?
89
00:04:12,445 --> 00:04:13,935
Muscle Man was
in here earlier.
90
00:04:14,013 --> 00:04:16,140
He was selling tickets
to watch you fail.
91
00:04:19,085 --> 00:04:20,609
Maybe he's right.
92
00:04:20,686 --> 00:04:23,587
I can't believe I'm gonna lose
my job over a stupid pull-up.
93
00:04:23,656 --> 00:04:24,953
You know, maybe
I can help you.
94
00:04:25,024 --> 00:04:27,822
I was on the Pep Squad
in High School.
95
00:04:27,893 --> 00:04:29,690
Thanks, Eileen,
96
00:04:29,762 --> 00:04:32,424
but I'm gonna need a lot more
than pep to do a pull-up.
97
00:04:41,741 --> 00:04:44,039
Training starts
after my shift.
98
00:04:47,313 --> 00:04:49,338
All right!
Give it a try!
99
00:04:51,817 --> 00:04:54,877
Ugh, this is too hard.
100
00:04:54,954 --> 00:04:56,421
I think I see
the problem.
101
00:04:56,489 --> 00:04:58,855
You're not visualizing
your own success.
102
00:04:58,924 --> 00:04:59,788
Huh?
103
00:04:59,859 --> 00:05:01,087
You need to see it.
104
00:05:01,160 --> 00:05:02,457
Close your eyes.
105
00:05:02,528 --> 00:05:05,156
Now visualize yourself
doing a pull-up.
106
00:05:05,231 --> 00:05:06,892
I can't.
107
00:05:06,966 --> 00:05:08,593
Come on,
you're not trying!
108
00:05:08,668 --> 00:05:10,932
Close your eyes
and really concentrate.
109
00:05:11,003 --> 00:05:12,163
What do you see?
110
00:05:14,040 --> 00:05:15,234
A grilled
cheese sandwich.
111
00:05:15,307 --> 00:05:16,433
Okay, okay.
112
00:05:16,509 --> 00:05:18,170
Picture that sandwich.
113
00:05:18,244 --> 00:05:22,010
Now picture your goal...
doing that one pull-up.
114
00:05:22,081 --> 00:05:23,241
Can you see it?
115
00:05:28,087 --> 00:05:29,554
Whomp-whomp! Ugh!
116
00:05:29,622 --> 00:05:30,850
Not cool, Bro.
117
00:05:30,923 --> 00:05:32,015
One pull-up.
118
00:05:32,091 --> 00:05:33,080
Can you see it?
119
00:05:39,265 --> 00:05:41,733
Look, I'm almost...
120
00:05:41,801 --> 00:05:43,564
Man, I almost had it!
121
00:05:43,636 --> 00:05:45,501
We'll get there.
122
00:06:22,775 --> 00:06:24,970
Come on, Rigby.
We're almost out of time!
123
00:06:25,044 --> 00:06:26,068
You can do this!
124
00:06:26,145 --> 00:06:27,112
I can do this!
125
00:06:27,179 --> 00:06:29,841
One pull-up! One pull-up!
126
00:06:29,915 --> 00:06:31,906
One pull-up!
127
00:06:37,123 --> 00:06:39,216
This is hopeless!
128
00:06:39,291 --> 00:06:40,986
I'm never gonna be
able to do this!
129
00:06:41,060 --> 00:06:43,460
Rigby! Rigby, wait!
130
00:06:43,529 --> 00:06:45,895
I know you can do it.
131
00:06:48,000 --> 00:06:49,262
This is so lame.
132
00:06:49,335 --> 00:06:51,098
Lame government fitness test.
133
00:06:51,170 --> 00:06:52,398
Lame arms.
134
00:06:52,471 --> 00:06:53,938
Why's it got to be so hard?!
135
00:06:54,006 --> 00:06:54,836
Feeling weak?
136
00:06:54,907 --> 00:06:56,272
Looking pathetic?
137
00:06:56,342 --> 00:06:59,072
If you're watching television,
you probably are!
138
00:06:59,145 --> 00:07:02,205
Luckily, this TV
commercial can save you!
139
00:07:02,281 --> 00:07:05,773
If you want muscle fast,
but hate working out,
140
00:07:05,851 --> 00:07:07,614
then you need The Russian!
141
00:07:07,686 --> 00:07:09,017
Yeah, I do.
142
00:07:09,088 --> 00:07:12,080
The Russian uses electrotherapy
to shock your muscles
143
00:07:12,158 --> 00:07:13,455
into growing.
144
00:07:13,526 --> 00:07:15,289
With no effort from you!
145
00:07:15,361 --> 00:07:18,660
Just switch it on, and
you'll be stronger in no time!
146
00:07:28,407 --> 00:07:29,965
Thank you, The Russian!
147
00:07:31,377 --> 00:07:32,537
Aw, yeah!
148
00:07:32,611 --> 00:07:34,841
That's exactly what I need!
149
00:07:40,286 --> 00:07:42,447
"Do not operate The Russian for
more than 10 minutes a day."
150
00:07:42,521 --> 00:07:43,954
Pfft!
151
00:07:44,023 --> 00:07:48,357
Well, I want to get extra buff,
so I'll leave it on for 11.
152
00:07:52,731 --> 00:07:54,358
Those jerks better
buy their tickets
153
00:07:54,433 --> 00:07:56,298
for the Gun Show
tomorrow!
154
00:07:59,605 --> 00:08:02,472
Thanks, The Russian!
155
00:08:06,445 --> 00:08:08,606
Where the heck is Rigby?
156
00:08:08,681 --> 00:08:10,114
We're almost out of time!
157
00:08:10,182 --> 00:08:12,776
Maybe his nerves
got the better of him.
158
00:08:12,852 --> 00:08:14,217
No, he'll be here.
159
00:08:14,286 --> 00:08:15,310
He better.
160
00:08:15,387 --> 00:08:16,684
'Cause I got a lot
of people here
161
00:08:16,755 --> 00:08:18,916
who paid good money to
watch him try.
162
00:08:20,326 --> 00:08:21,918
Let me remind you...
163
00:08:21,994 --> 00:08:24,792
there are no refunds
in the event of a no-show.
164
00:08:27,633 --> 00:08:28,622
This is really weird.
165
00:08:28,701 --> 00:08:30,635
Rigby trained really
hard for this.
166
00:08:30,703 --> 00:08:32,330
He wouldn't
just blow it off.
167
00:08:32,404 --> 00:08:34,065
I'll go check on him.
168
00:08:35,774 --> 00:08:37,833
Rigby?
Oh, there you are.
169
00:08:37,910 --> 00:08:39,241
You got to...
170
00:08:40,946 --> 00:08:42,140
It worked!
171
00:08:42,214 --> 00:08:43,272
What did you do?!
172
00:08:43,349 --> 00:08:45,715
I used The Russian
to get totally ripped!
173
00:08:45,784 --> 00:08:47,251
This is awesome!
174
00:08:47,319 --> 00:08:49,719
Now to go bust
out my pull-up!
175
00:08:49,788 --> 00:08:51,722
Huh?
176
00:08:51,790 --> 00:08:53,621
My muscles are too heavy!
177
00:08:53,692 --> 00:08:54,920
I can't stand up!
178
00:08:54,994 --> 00:08:58,555
Oh, Rigby, there are no
shortcuts to physical fitness.
179
00:08:58,631 --> 00:09:00,496
Oh, no,
I'm gonna lose my job!
180
00:09:02,768 --> 00:09:03,996
No, no, no, no!
181
00:09:06,739 --> 00:09:08,297
Come on, you can
still make it.
182
00:09:08,374 --> 00:09:10,774
Aw, it's hopeless!
183
00:09:10,843 --> 00:09:11,775
No, it's not!
184
00:09:11,844 --> 00:09:12,936
There's still time!
185
00:09:13,012 --> 00:09:13,979
Do what I say!
186
00:09:14,046 --> 00:09:15,604
Close your eyes!
187
00:09:15,681 --> 00:09:18,047
Now picture that pull-up bar!
188
00:09:18,117 --> 00:09:19,482
Do you see it?
189
00:09:20,986 --> 00:09:21,816
I see it!
190
00:09:21,887 --> 00:09:23,252
I see the pull-up bar!
191
00:09:23,322 --> 00:09:24,414
Then go do it!!
192
00:09:27,960 --> 00:09:28,858
You're doing it!
193
00:09:28,928 --> 00:09:30,896
Just use your arms!
194
00:09:30,963 --> 00:09:33,523
Keep going! That's it!
195
00:09:37,736 --> 00:09:39,328
Pfft, he's late!
196
00:09:41,774 --> 00:09:43,139
What is that?
197
00:09:44,944 --> 00:09:45,774
It's Rigby!
198
00:09:50,049 --> 00:09:53,212
You've only got
30 seconds left!
199
00:10:05,798 --> 00:10:07,095
Yes!!
200
00:10:07,166 --> 00:10:08,360
Aah!
201
00:10:11,370 --> 00:10:12,701
Rigby!
202
00:10:14,873 --> 00:10:18,070
Rigby, you have 15 seconds to
get up here and do a pull-up!
203
00:10:18,143 --> 00:10:19,075
15 seconds?!
204
00:10:19,144 --> 00:10:20,338
Whoa.
205
00:10:20,412 --> 00:10:24,178
Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!
206
00:10:24,249 --> 00:10:25,511
Yeah!
207
00:10:31,256 --> 00:10:33,156
Time!
208
00:10:34,960 --> 00:10:36,393
You did it, Rigby!
209
00:10:36,462 --> 00:10:37,690
You can stay at the park!
210
00:10:42,267 --> 00:10:45,703
Rigby!
Rigby, you were wonderful!
211
00:10:45,771 --> 00:10:46,999
Thanks, Eileen.
212
00:10:47,072 --> 00:10:48,596
I couldn't have
done it without you.
213
00:10:48,674 --> 00:10:51,074
I'd hug you, but I should
probably wait till these
214
00:10:51,143 --> 00:10:52,440
muscles go away.
215
00:10:52,511 --> 00:10:54,103
I don't want to
break your spine.
216
00:10:54,179 --> 00:10:56,773
I'll take my chances.
217
00:10:58,217 --> 00:10:59,548
Totally worth it.
218
00:11:03,217 --> 00:11:10,148
Ripped By mstoll
14189
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