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Reagan: Gotta say, those economy seats feel a lot bigger
when someone else is paying for them.
What?
Okay, I know you're used to it,
but I'm freaking pumped.
If I would've known that there were travel perks,
I would havejoined the dark side a long time ago.
Please. Stop calling your own people "the dark side."
And remember, the goal of attending this gaming conference
is to represent the casino.
Mmm-hmm. Totally.
Do you think that this suitcase
is big enough for all of the free swag?
Terry, relax.
I am the poster child for professionalism, okay?
Oh, my god,
is that for us?
Ah, act like you've been in a car before.
Okay.
Do we tip you? Do we tip him?
Deirdre: Why is it so dark in here?
Nathan: Because I'm hung over.
What do you want, chisenhall?
I have a multi-step plan
that can save the town's land and yours.
Step one begins
when the town council meets this week
to discuss big Larry.
Due to my advocacy,
they all want to move it.
I thought you were gonna say a plan.
Just sounds like you're dunking on me.
But now big Larry will stay put
as doing so
serves both of our interests.
It does? How?
Okay,
let's say this corral is a town council meeting,
and I guess the horses are the council.
Okay.
You're a pig.
Big Larry will stay put
because at the meeting
you'll make a "save the statue"
speech that is so moving and eloquent
that I will suddenly side with you.
Why would you do that?
When people see
that I've come around to the statue,
our unlikely alliance
will create an inspiring narrative
that people will want to rally around.
Yeah.
People will be like, "whoa, they're together.
"I wanna be a part of that."
And then, boom. Step two.
We flood the daily star
with pro-rutherford op-eds.
We host events at your museum
that gin up civic pride.
Bobbie cranks out the memes and the hashtags.
We create a movement. Us versus Terry.
And by the time his land deal is up for final approval...
There's no way the town will sign off on it.
That's a smart piggy.
Ah, I think of myself as more of a rooster
crowing forjustice, but, uh...
This is a really good plan.
I know.
Mmm. I love that leather smell.
Don't mind if I do.
What?
Listen, we spent years trying to work our way up
from a double-wide bingo hall to a mid-tier casino,
but with this rutherford land deal
happening so much faster than I had intended,
we're in a position to show these other nations
that we're leveling up in a major way.
I'm so happy for you. A reminder, though.
Idontlove your hedonistic ayn rand fever dream.
What I'm saying is you should think bigger.
Forget the swag.
You're about to meet the most successful entrepreneurs
and philanthropists across Indian country.
Nice.
Nathan. He feels bad.
I found a townes Van zandt cd
taped to my door with "if I needed you" highlighted.
So much drama.
This is why it's not worth
being friends with white people.
Mmm.
We now move to discussion
of measure 347b,
removal of the big Larry statue on county road.
First to speak will be Nathan rutherford.
Here we go.
Good luck.
Members of the council,
mayor chisenhall, my fellow citizens,
I have come here today to say one thing.
The statue of Lawrence rutherford,
is in the way.
What? There's just no way to deny that.
Where is he going with this?
Nathan: But that's no surprise.
Lawrence rutherford has always been in the way.
When king Charles ii imposed unfair taxes on the colonies,
Lawrence rutherford stood in his way,
rallying the town against tyranny.
When the French refused to trade with the minishonka,
Lawrence rutherford stood in the way of bigotry,
penning the fair and honest deal,
and thus founding rutherford falls.
And so a statue was erected
on the exact spot of that historic deal.
Now, I know, it's kind of an awkward time for statues.
Many have been rightly removed.
They commemorated questionable deeds,
but when a statue commemorates
the great deeds of our ancestors,
mustn't we preserve that
as guidance andinspuafion for our future?
Inspiration. Future.
Thank you, citizen.
And so big Larry stands
shoulders back, heart full,
proclaiming, "yes, yes, I am in the way,"
and he should stay in the way
now and forever.
I yield my time.
Well, it's not yielding your time when you use it all,
but quite the moving speech, Mr. Rutherford.
Unfortunately, that doesn't change the fact
that the statue's location is an issue of public safety.
You know, ihavelong advocated
for the moving of this statue,
but perhaps I've been too rigid
in my thinking.
Walter: What are you talking about?
I thought, we all...
Nathan's passion has moved me,
and if two people
from very different backgrounds
can come together in Harmony
on this issue,
well, isn't that in itself a monument
to the resilience and progress of our fair town?
Man: Yes.
Yes.
Very stirring words, mayor chisenhall.
Walter: Different backgrounds?
I'm sorry. Didn't you guys go to the same high school?
David: She's right.
We're all the same underneath.
I move, we take the issue for further study.
Yeah.
Second.
Whoa. Nice medallion, flavor flav.
Our people have an old saying,
"if you've got it, flaunt it."
Speaking of...
Oh, business cards?
What... what booth did you get this at, and where can I find it?
Reagan, you are now
the associate director
of the running thunder casino.
Okay. Wow.
That is an important-sounding title. Question.
Does this new job
come with a pay increase and or bennies,
and what does an associate director do exactly?
We'll work out the details later,
but the short answer is, no, no, and whatever I say.
Right now, I need you
to stop pocketing swag,
andlook professional.
Roy: Oh, my, Terry Thomas!
Great to see you. Congrats on running lightning.
It's a big step for a little minishonka nation.
Hmm.
Regan Wells, this is Roy crooks,
director of the spirit pond resort and casino
in Minnesota.
Oh, that's the old name.
Now, we're the spirit pond resort, casino,
indoor water park, and dispensary.
Now folks can gamble,
get a little toasty,
and float down a lazy river.
Holy shit!
Roy: Hey, you doing plyotronics yet?
I can give you the number to our guy.
No need. We do our plyotronics in-house.
Good for you.
See yous over there.
See yous in there.
What are plyotronics?
Noidea.
Googling it now.
Zero results.
Wow, that is cutting edge.
Nathan: All right, and here we have a fine cabernet
from the finger lakes region.
This particular bottle is one of 12
won by my great uncle,
James hatter rutherford,
in a game of old maid in 1964.
You know, I'd like to propose a toast
to you, our mastermind.
We couldn't have done this without your plan
and your ability to overlook
the rutherford-chisenhall feud.
Cheers. Cheers.
Well, you know what they say,
"the enemy of my enemy
"is my temporary co-conspirator."
All righty.
Mmm.
And I have to give you credit.
That speech you gave was impressive.
Oh, come on.
You know, I was just speaking from the heart.
It's easy to be passionate when you mean it.
All right.
What's your deal?
How is it that you care
this much about this stuff?
Hmm.
I want to show you something.
Deirdre: That's a butter knife.
Nathan: Is it? Or is it history?
Hmm.
In 1722,
Gregory chisenhall snuck into the rutherford stables
in the dead of night,
and stole a prized thoroughbred.
He stole a horse?
That's why your family's held this stupid grudge
all these years?
Well, no, it gets crazier.
So, Charles rutherford then chased Gregory and the horse
all the way to lake placid.
A fight ensued,
and enraged, Charles attempted to plunge
this knife into Gregory's chest.
Of course, this being a butter knife,
it only left a bruise.
But you can see here on the handle,
where it's splintered,
and Charles was actually hurt
worse than Gregory.
He got a terrible infection, almost died
and thus began the 300-year feud.
All because of a butter knife.
And a chisenhall...
And a rutherford...
Nathan: Good morning.
Oh, wow. Um...
Thanks for the wine and et cetera,
but I should head out.
Iwlbeintouch with the next steps.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
Deirdre, just,
uh, stick around a little bit.
I mean, we can talk about the plan or the weather.
Yeah, at least have some breakfast.
Look at this.
Isuppose the damage is done.
That's the spirit! All right.
Hey, don't go in there.
It's the worst. It's so boring.
Oh. I think I'm supposed to.
I'm an associate director.
Us, too, but in there, is two hours
of comparing notation apps.
Or you can come and hang with us.
You guys coming in?
Hope you like ice breakers.
Yeah, we can't go in there.
We still need a solution for the road around big Larry,
but if we keep the town and council on our side
until Terry announces his casino expansion...
Why are you still smiling like that?
A rutherford and a chisenhall...
I mean, for the first time in recorded history.
Stop.
This has never happened before, Deirdre.
We walked on the moon last night.
You're ridiculous, and I'm leaving,
and I'm taking this biscuit.
Okay, um,
when am I gonna see you again?
Or, uh...
Will I see you again?
Maybe.
Hey, it's me, um...
Listen, I know it's been a while,
and we're not really talking right now,
but I had to call you because, um,
I had sex with Deirdre chisenhall last night,
and it was totally amazing and awesome,
and I just felt like you totally had to know,
and so, okay, call me back. Bye.
Soon, gaming will comprise
less than 30% of the revenue for our nation.
Those who get stuck playing the old games in the old ways
will simply get left behind.
Now I'd like to take any questions.
Me. Excuse me. I have a question.
Uh, when you say soon,
this is all, what, uh, 20 years away, maybe 30?
That's cute. No, these projections are for 2023, so...
It's a good one, though, Terry.
Some of that famous minishonka humor.
Laughter is medicine for our people, so...
Deirdre: Morning, Charlie.
As your employee, it's not appropriate for me to ask
why you're wearing the same outfit as yesterday, so I won't.
I had sex with Nathan rutherford.
Wha... what?
Uh, well, let's talk this out.
Oh, god, what have I done?
It's bad, isn't it?
This could be really good.
Your voters vote in the town that shares his name.
Also, I like him.
The last guy was not a full 9-11 truther,
but... uh, can we not?
I have to think on this.
In the meantime, I just pray
I can count on Nathan's discretion.
Ah, I hooked up with Deirdre chisenhall last night.
Yeah.
Tell me everything.
Okay. Uh, you can't tell anybody.
Honestly. I'm not even sure
it's appropriate for me to be telling you this,
but Reagan's not answering my calls, so...
Spill, bitch!
Okay. All right.
It was totally unexpected. She came over,
iopened a bottle of cabernet... hatter rutherford's?
Yeah, natch.
And then next thing I know, I'm making her breakfast.
Ah! This is incredible.
You're like an old Hollywood couple,
like Shawn mendes and Camila cabello.
Yeah, okay.
Things are really turning around
for Nathan rutherford here, you know?
This is... this is good.
This feels really good.
We got to build on this momentum.
Keep up the victim narrative,
so people stay sympathetic to my cause.
Bingo.
We should get you a key.
Big Larry was vandalized last night
and there's a bunch of crap spray painted all over him
and the town is up in arms.
O-m-g.
Oh, for Christ's sake.
Nathan! It was Bobbie's idea.
Classic false flag operation.
Don't worry, nobody saw us,
and the enamel washes off super easily.
It'll win over any townspeople or council members
who are still on the fence.
And thus begins step two.
Galvanizing public opinion.
You've got some moves, Mr. Rutherford.
Shall we discuss step three?
Well, that was unexpected.
Nice, but unexpected.
Yeah, I should get going.
I really want to make a big show
of cleaning up the statue.
I could show up. Condemn the vandalism.
Listen to us, already scheming like a political power couple.
Hmm, very house of cards.
Ooh!
You know, iwatched two episodes of that.
Everybody was really mean to each other.
Decided it wasn't for me.
I love the show bones, though.
Hmm. Oh.
My boss spent $4 million
of the tribes profits on a yacht.
We live in Idaho.
Where does this moron think he's sailing to?
Woman: How about you? Any war stories?
Oh, no, I've only been an associate director for 15 hours...
Hmm... and I'm using thisjob
to advance my cultural center, so...
That's your Rick's honeymoon.
What?
My Rick's what-ing moon?
Woman: Rick was an ad from years ago,
always saving up for a honeymoon in Italy,
but he kept pushing it off and putting it off and...
And we all have our versions.
And the only reason I took this job
was to get me through med school,
but that was 15 years ago?
Wow.
What about you guys?
Tribal language teacher.
Chemical dependency counselor.
Oh, god.
Look, ad is a good gig. Be happy.
And Rick did eventually go on that honeymoon, right?
He got divorced.
They never even got passports.
When we work together and we share our unique ideas,
that's not only innovative, but it's traditional.
I have to go on Rick's honeymoon.
What?
Hold on. The next presentation is about to begin.
Yeah. Thank you, Roy.
Allow me to present the newest
innovation in gaming.
Long ago, when money was new,
our people thrived
by selling our most beautiful traditional art
to euro-American tourists.
That was then,
but the future is now. Completely experiential,
our customers are limited only by their imagination
and bank accounts.
Welcome to the casino of tomorrow.
What in the name of black mirror is this?
The defacement of big Larry is an assault
to the very soul of our town.
Local authorities will do everything they can
to catch the culprits responsible.
You are one handsome devil.
Should have done this a long time ago.
"Mal merde"?
Never seen that before.
Deirdre: Everything okay up there?
Yeah.
Nathan: Thanks for meeting with me, rayanne.
Let me show you what I found
etched into big Larry.
Rayanne: The first part's in our language,
but this part...
Shit.
Wait, what? What does it say?
That's what it says.
Bad shit. "Mal merde".
Mal merde. Where have I heard that before?
Well, it's a French and Indian amalgam.
It was common back then because of all the trading.
That's why so many of our last names are so frenched up.
Okay, so what does the whole phrase mean?
Thatsays, uh,
"don't trust mal-mer."
Yeah, over time, mal merde became mal-mer.
The people say that a monster came from across the ocean,
and made its home here
in the woodlands of the minishonka,
wore the mask of a white man,
and pretended to be our friend.
And this was just, like, local folklore?
Yes.
And this monster had an insatiable appetite
for one thing.
The poop of children.
I'm just confused.
What does a poop-eating forest creature
have to do with Lawrence rutherford?
I hate to tell you this, Nathan,
but the legend of mal-mer
is actually about Lawrence rutherford.
I'm serious.
He was a real bastard to our people.
Lawrence sr. May not have eaten poop,
but pardon my French, he was a real shithead.
Yeah, no, that's...
Are you sure your knowledge of your language
is accurate?
Yeah, sorry. I... I apologize.
That was...
Thank you for your candor.
Can't stop thinking about this vr presentation.
It's so freaking messed up.
I know. That tech will be obsolete
before they even make their nut.
So shortsighted.
Um, but mostly, it's super tropey and stereotypical,
and it sets all of us back
by, like, 100 years, right?
Would I do a lone ranger and Tonto thing?
Not my taste.
But a lot of westerns were shot on navajo lands.
If it brings in profits, who am I to judge?
Doesn't matter. Casinos are over.
Now it's all marijuana theme parks.
We'll never catch up.
Hey, you okay?
You're looking very end-of-the-trail right now.
This was supposed to be our victory dance,
but every time we level up, so do they.
Bullshit.
"Every time we level up,
"so do they"?
Hey, I'm making big sacrifices
to join you on this,
not to watch you be a big baby.
I'm not going to give up,
and neither should you.
So what's it gonna be?
You gonna cry around about it all day?
Or are you gonna suck it up and be the badass
everyone knows you are?
Let's go then, Thomas.
Let's do this, Wells.
Yeah.
How exactly do we do this?
I actually don't know.
But this?
This is not leveling up, okay?
This is a native minstrel show,
and we can do better.
Does seem lucrative.
Terry, you hate it when white people portray us like this.
Now we have a little bit of power
and we're gonna do it to ourselves?
Reagan.
You are a genius.
What's happening?
We have a lot of work to do.
Nathan: "The monster was once a foreign friend
"to the people,
"but his greed for their harvest
"turned him into a twisted beast.
"Mal-mer took everything from the minishonka,
"and when they had nothing left to give,
"he came for their feces?"
Jesus.
Ooh!
Nathan: Reags. Hey, there.
Hey, I've been trying to reach you.
Sorry, I was traveling for work.
Oh. Oh, yeah, yeah. Where'd you go?
Well, I... we should begin.
There have been some rifts historically and recently
among the people in this room.
But what if I told you
we could turn a large profit
for the minishonka nation,
employ every citizen of rutherford falls,
allow Nathan to keep his home,
and settle the big Larry issue once and for all?
I say you're full of it.
Yeah, what she said.
Fair enough.
But this idea comes straight
from my new associate director.
Reagan, take it away.
Wh... what?
Since when? Reagan: Thank you, Terry.
He gives me too much credit.
Um, but I am thrilled
to announce an exciting new chapter.
Rutherford falls is a town defined by its history,
and that history can benefit us all.
We present to you...
Ye olde rutherford village,
a cutting-edge retail tourism community.
Terry: The entire town center will be transformed
into 17th century rutherford falls
with period costumes and shops,
just like colonial williamsburg.
Oh, my god.
Revamping the town will create
hundreds of new jobs,
as will the new and improved
running lightning casino and resort.
Our future is our past.
There's only three people on the east coast
that can make a model this detailed.
Who did this? Was it Danielle?
Did Danielle make this?
Ramone?
Marshall?
Marshall? How could you?
Isang at your wedding.
You want to change the name and civic order
of an already established township?
Not at all.
The name only applies to the new shopping complex.
In this version of things, we own the land,
but the town remains mostly the same size
minus the area we use to expand the casino.
An influx of new businesses and visitors
means your tax revenue will go way up.
Huh. Well, that was a pretty positive "huh."
I'm thinking, Nathan.
My constituents might like lots ofjobs and money.
Nathan: This is absurd.
Nathan, look at the opportunity here.
We could showcase the rutherford brand
in the way that you've always imagined.
I'm sorry, who are you?
You sound like Terry.
Are you my best friend
or the associate director of terrible ideas?
Terry: We're trying to make Disney world,
and, Nathan, we want you to be our Mickey mouse.
And as long as you work with us,
you can remain in your house,
and run your museum.
Uh, so you're gonna take my land,
but allow me to stay on it under your terms?
Think of it as a fair and honest deal.
Well, you can take your deal,
and shove it up your fair and honest butt.
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