Original subtitles

Everyone thinks big Larry is in the wrong place. He's not!

The road is.

Therefore, the town shall construct a traffic tunnel

running underneath the statue.

Like so.

Yeah. No.

Give me one good reason this isn't totally awesome.

Everyone agrees that we should just move the statue, Nathan.

And don't you have bigger things to worry about right now?

Man, you chisenhalls just love sticking it

to the rutherfords, don't you?

All right, tell you what. We'll regroup,

and we'll be back next Tuesday at our regular session.

Does noon still work for you? Deirdre1n0!

We don't have a regular session!

You two birdbrains just show up every week

unannounced on my lunch break!

Look, this took me 16 hours to build,

sojust, maybe, play with it.

The cars are really fun. It might grow on you.

Bye, Nathan! Okay.

Josh! Hi!

What are you... hi.

Hi. Uh, lwasjust talking to some locals

and, uh, getting some casino ambience for my podcast.

And also, I just wanted to see you again.

So I got you an oat milk latte.

Wow.

You remembered that I'm lactose intolerant. Thank you.

Also, you don't have to do that thing that guys do

where they're, like, checking up on you after sex

because they feel obligated.

Um, I'm not doing that.

Also, I don't think anyone's ever done that? Really?

Excuse me, sir. Is this sad lady bothering you?

What? Are you lost?

Looking for the men's room? Is that why you're talking to her?

Sally: You don't have to lower yourself this way.

I'll take you from here.

Okay, enough.

Josh, this is Wayne and Sally. They're terrible.

Nice to meet you.

Well, that's some way to talk to the only two people ever visit this dump.

Reagan: Not a dump. Sally: Yeah, it's more of an empty void.

Mm, the only minishonka artifacts in here

are that basket and those bangs.

Okay, well, what are you guys doing to help?

I tried to meet with Sally's aunt

and you gave me the phone number to the Pentagon.

Oh, yeah, I forgot about that.

It's super easy to drag me. I get it.

But, seriously, what are you two doing for our people?

No, you're right.

It's super easy to drag you.

Wayne: It's a big part of the appeal.

Plus, we quit smoking, and...

Both: Gotta have something.

I think the bangs work.

Yeah. Thank you!

What is the move to sway Deirdre?

We hack her phone and blackmail her

with whatever dirt we find.

Bobbie. Love your passion, but you can't always go to blackmail.

All right? It scares me how often you draw from that well.

I'm a product of the times.

Hey, Kaitlyn! To what do we owe this delight?

Terry Thomas just named our company

in a lawsuit brought by the minishonka nation.

Wow. So he's really poking the bear.

He's gonna regret not taking that popcorn.

You offered him... ugh. Never mind. I don't wanna know.

Nathan, listen. Your name is all over this lawsuit.

His lawyer cited you as an employee of the company.

Well, yeah. I mean, I'm on the board.

As a ceremonial gesture.

Sort of, like, how we have the town's image on all of our products,

but no one who works here has ever been there.

Well, iwork there, and I've been here a lot.

Okay. Do you have any idea how much other crap I'm dealing with?

The cuyahoga river is glowing from factory runoff.

I mean, it's Cleveland, so nobody cares.

I never said that.

Hi, Kaitlyn, Bobbie Yang here.

Um, bioluminescence is actually a natural phenomenon.

Maybe you could blame it on that.

Hmm. That's pretty good.

Okay, we're sending legal counsel from the firm Quinn & hall.

Nathan, I need you to do exactly what they say and nothing else.

I hear you loud and clear, my fearless. And...

Hmm. Signal dropped or something.

All right, you heard Kaitlyn.

We have mere hours to turn the museum into a war room.

Write this down.

All right. I'm gonna need four dozen bagels,

two pints of cream cheese,

low fat, these are city people.

Any chive?

I'm freezing on that one. Come back to me on that.

Okay. Oh, some brownies.

Can you make brownies? But, like blondies.

Blondies, okay. After that? Nathan: Yeah, uh...

I feel like we're gonna need toothpicks. I don't know why.

Toothpicks. And...

Just get a sleeve of solo cups, just in case.

"Sleeve of solo cups." I can hang a welcome banner.

Bobbie, if raises existed in the world of unpaid internships,

that would be a double bump.

That means the world to me.

Well, you mean the world to me. Come on!

And I hate to say it, but Wayne and Sally were right.

I do need more items.

And I should grow my bangs out.

Hmm. But the most annoying part is,

is that they interrupted my flirty moment with Josh.

You like him!

Yeah. Yeah! Mm-hmm.

He lives in Brooklyn, and he'll most likely leave when his story's done.

So it's dumb even considering.

Don't do that. What?

The thing you just did. The Reagan thing that you do.

Where you just, like, give up on a guy before he even has a chance.

Let something happen.

Allow it to happen.

Seize the moment. This could be the moment.

Hey, what's, uh, what's Terry doing?

Looks like he's getting ready to peacock in front of your lawyers.

They haven't deep cleaned the carpet

since David Lee roth was supposed to come.

Ended up being David leroth, French magician.

Saddestday of my mom's life.

One of the best nights of my life. That show was incredible.

Hey, I know that Terry is kind of a force,

and that you're probably a little bit worried

about... not at all. What?

Terry is the one who should be worried. My guys are, like, power brokers.

Are you kidding me? Trust me, it's all good.

Okay, we have regular, half-caf, decaf, cereal, go-gurt, chive cream cheese.

But I'm worried we don't have enough bagels.

Okay, well, uh, let's see.

Kaitlyn said they're sending iegalcounsel

you gotta figure that's about a baker's dozen.

Each lawyer could have their own Bobbie.

We could be talking 25-30 people.

You know what? We're done.

You go to war with the bagels you have.

Right. Oh, did you remember the banner?

Sure did.

Wow, that's a good looking banner.

I left out the year so we could reuse it.

Bobbie, that was smart.

They're here.

Nathan: Wait.

Is there anyone else, or...

They must've drove separately.

Nathan rutherford?

Uh, yeah, that's me.

Blake Jensen, Quinn & hall.

I'm here to change the sheets on the bed that you shat.

Definitely a little bit thrown that they only sent one guy.

But he seems like a killer, right?

Yeah. And he's surface-of-the-sun hot.

You think every guy is hot.

I'm 16. Doesn't take much.

Okay.

He definitely did not wash his hands.

Let's talk strategy.

Saw your founder's day speech and I listened to that podcast.

Thank you. You sounded insane.

Blake: I was cracking up.

At you, not with you, just to be clear.

Got it. This Terry guy seems pretty crushable.

I mean, anybody that runs a casino outside of Vegas

or monte-Carlo has to be an idiot, right?

Oh, Terry's not an idiot, like, at all.

Well, iwent to Harvard law, so I'm pretty sure I can handle

whatever tomahawks he throws at me.

Oh! I'm not sure I would use that phrase, or anything else racist.

But love the enthusiasm.

What can we do to help?

Right. Here's what I'm gonna need from you.

Nothing. Do nothing. Say nothing.

Done! But, uh...

Come on! Let's roll.

Do you want a bagel before we leave?

Uh, if you got those around here, those are not really bagels.

I hate that I love him.

Reagan: What... in the name of Marie kondo...

Both: Surprise!

Oh, I know I say this a lot but...

What the hell is wrong with you two? What happened to my cultural center?

It's a minishonka Tsunami, baby!

You telling us that we don't do something, really made us wanna do it.

So we made a Facebook post asking the tribe

to donate whatever they could spare to showcase minishonka pride!

Wayne: Look, look. Oh!

"Show your minishonka pride by helping someone down and out."

Very nice. Makes me sound homeless.

Did you really need to bold the words "sad" and "lonely"?

Okay, well, itworked. So, you're welcome.

You know, this actually, this is gorgeous.

This is a good one.

And this has no historic value.

Man, you're always crying around about having no items in this place.

And now you're too bougie for these humble artifacts.

Ungrateful. Wayne: Hmm.

Okay, you both know that 90% of this stuff belongs in a landfill.

I mean...

A blender, and a vhs copy of young guns ii.

Wayne's uncle Earl was in that movie.

That's right. Him and Emilio got super tight.

That's why my cousin's named estevez. For real?

Mm-hmm. Reagan: You know what?

Actually, I just got back on people's good side,

and now they're giving me gifts.

So, I'm sure there's gems in here.

We just need to start by sorting the...

Damn it.

Okay, Josh.

I'm just gonna say it.

Idontsee a welcome banner.

Nathan. Bobbie. Good to see you.

Likewise.

Terry: Council members and the rest of the board are on their way up.

Where are the lawyers your company sent?

He's, uh, using the facilities.

They only sent one. Nathan: Yeah.

One-man wrecking crew.

Those are surprisingly clean bathrooms.

Blake Jensen, Quinn & hall. Hi.

Oh, let's skip the handshake and we'll go straight down to brass tacks. Shall we?

I'm gonna use a visual aid.

This represents rutherford inc.'S $70 billion value.

Whoa! He's big short-ing it. I like it.

Me too.

Blake: And this is our settlement offer.

It's $500,000 for you to drop this bullshit,

and buy yourself some new slot machines.

But you seem like a hungry guy.

Maybe one's not enough, so I'll add another. It's an even million.

Then you counter, you bluff your way up.

Let me just save us some time.

You got yourself a fun pack.

It's three million, final offer.

I mean, we could go back and forth, but in the end, we both know that...

300 million.

I was thinking more, like, 300 million.

Not three.

Three hundred.

Listen to me, Mr. Thomas.

No, you listen to me, Blake.

You went to Harvard law school, didn't you?

Yes, I did. Class of2018...

There's a building called Jensen hall.

You do a lot of studying at Jensen hall, Blake Jensen?

Well... and this law firm you work for.

Your dad's a partner there, right?

It's my uncle.

Was that a good comeback?

No, it wasn't.

Thank you for bringing your candy expertise

to explain things to a simpleton like me.

But I will not waste time negotiating with someone

whose legal experience consists of fighting his own dui charges.

Let me get down to brass tacks.

You're gonna take your nepotistic, first-year associate bullshit

back to Manhattan,

which is lenape land filled with skyscrapers built by mohawks.

And you're gonna tell the people at your firm who actually matter

to be here by Friday at noon, or I will bring the wrath of god down so hard

that their tennis instructor's children will feel it.

Tell them, I'll come for their summer homes,

and their accountants' teslas.

I will make sure all your lives

are a complete and total disaster.

You're...

So mean!

Let's go! Go, go, go, go, go. Go!

Mom, it's me.

It went horrible. It was my first big meeting. And I just totally biffed it.

Can you call uncle Percy for me, please?

I appreciate masculine vulnerability, but what a little bitch!

Thank you for helping me.

No, I'm glad you called.

It turns out recording casino sounds all day leads to severe depression.

Well, so does going through people's junk.

An exhibit worthy of the met.

So what are you gonna tell people

whose stuff we threw away?

Um, that I'm putting it into the archives,

which is the name of the dumpster that we're throwing it into.

So, technically, not a lie. Hmm.

Josh: Okay. Reagan: Yeah.

Hey, Reagan. Hey!

Maya. Terry's daughter.

Yeah, hi! I don't think you're supposed to be in a casino.

My mom's outside waiting for me.

Um, I just... I saw that post, and... oh.

I wanted to donate some of my bead work.

But maybe you already have enough stuff?

No, these are amazing. Are you sure you wanna give them away?

I will take them. And you did promise.

Totally. I know they're just emojis,

but I love looking at old beadwork to get ideas and stuff.

And itwould be cool if one day a mlnishonka girl could look at these

and get inspired, you know?

Yes, I do know.

Thank you. Of course!

Bye!

I mean, this is what I was hoping for.

Items with meaning.

Sure. Yeah, uh, but...

If you didn't talk to her you might not have gotten that meaning, right?

So, maybe some of this has that, too.

Well, I mean, do we really need to know the back story of the can opener?

Okay, yeah, not everything.

But, look, my boss told me

that there's no story here and I came anyway.

And while it's not exactly what I was expecting,

there is something here.

So maybe if you let go of what you were hoping to find,

you might be able to see what you've really got.

The podcasting voice is very manipulative.

Yeah, it really helps when I'm disputing credit card charges.

Okay, fine.

Let's ask some people about their very random stuff.

Yes! Why am I so excited about this?

I don't know.

Thanks, Jess.

Mm-hmm.

That was so cool. You saying no to all that money?

Yeah, well, we need to talk to the real lawyers.

The ones who come in black suvs

wearing Gucci loafers and tailored suits,

six men, maybe one woman, probably for show.

Until they get here, I'm not negotiating.

Well, that was so badass.

I mean, if people hear that you turned down $ 3,000,000,

imagine how pissed off they'd be.

Which is why it's of utmost importance

that we tell no one about this.

Of course.

I just mean that if they were to find out,

then they'd be super pissed.

You can go.

I'll clean these up.

Okay!

Uh, rutherford inc. Isn't, um, returning my calls.

Um, they're obviously on top of it.

They're gonna crush it.

I guess, it's just getting unclear where I fit into the crushing process.

And, so I need somebody really solid and trustworthy in my corner.

You okay?

I am not. That burned hard.

You just can't win with these things.

Eat them too soon, you burn your tongue.

Wait too long, and it is as cold as a witch's tit.

Yeah.

So, I charge a flat fee of $ 600.

That's for everything, from this meeting to the judge's ruling.

Doesn't matter how long it takes.

How is that a sustainable business model?

I'm just excited for the work.

I've only got one other client right now.

Lydia Patterson.

She's suing the city for not moving that statue everyone's crashing into.

Well, ifyou're representing Lydia,

don't you have to recuse yourself from my case?

Hmm.

Yeah, hang on one sec here.

"Recuse."

"To excuse oneself from a case because of a potential conflict of interest,

"or lack of impartiality."

Mm-hmm.

Huh.

"Impartiality."

"Equal treatment of all rivals or disputants. Fairness."

That cleared up nothing for me.

Hmm.

Reagan: Thank you both for coming.

I really appreciate the help.

We're here forjosh, notyou.

Yeah, we like him.

Even though he has terrible taste in women.

Cool. Thanks. Um...

Why don't you tell me about the snow globe?

Tommy Wilson once hitchhiked all the way down to Miami.

Only time he ever left the res.

He thought snow in Florida was so funny,

so he brought this back.

Oh, and, he brought the Macarena to our people six months before it got big.

That was him?

My mother used to make ribbon dresses,

but she passed away a few years ago.

I never learned how, but I know

she would want someone in the tribe to get them.

When I saw that post, I had to donate my granny's celebrity rock collection.

She's got everyone in here from Marilyn Monroe...

To zendaya. Or daya.

Thank you so much. Yeah, this is interesting.

But actually, the cultural center is intended for minishonka items.

Oh, both my grandparents always told me I was part.

And I got the proof right here.

Ooh.

Are you really gonna tell me these little babyjazz apples that I got under my eyes

aren't 100% minishonka?

Okay, uh, thank you so much for coming in today, Ms. Fish.

See you later, sister.

Archives? Yes, please.

After she got divorced, mavis mcclair started this sad candle company.

Beware mal-mer?

It's just this made up story.

Basically like a monster that eats your poop.

We tell it to little kids so that they don't take so long shitting in the woods.

Is that a big problem around here?

Not anymore.

I was a featured extra on this movie.

Got real close with Emilio.

He gave me the nicest compliment.

He said, I was doing a lot in my scenes.

Oh, wow.

A week later, I went on a date with a girl, I told her I knew Emilio.

Thirty years, four kids, two dogs

and a snake later, we're still together.

That is beautiful.

And can you believe it?

She's still dynamite in the sack.

Oh! That's...

Why don't you, uh, tell me about the blender?

Oh! My sister corissa took it to standing rock to protest the pipeline.

Hmm. They ground beans for coffee,

blended tomatoes for soup.

Mixed smoothies for shailene woodley.

Then it broke. January 24, 2017,

when pipeline construction was allowed to begin.

What are the chances that they would break on the same day?

Pretty good, actually.

Corissa was pissed and she smashed it against a yurt post.

Still, that blender saw everything.

Where is that thing anyway?

Josh: What's so special about a blender?

We just... shailene... Protests the...

Pipeline... smoothie... It's a whole...

I found it!

Yes! Yes, that's it. That's it, yes.

Thank you.

Do you smell that?

Yes, I do.

It's disgusting.

Yep. I really wanna kiss you, but...

We are waist-deep in garbage right now.

Let's take a shower. And then, later.

Yeah. Yeah.

Okay. Okay.

Well, yeah. I just feel really out of the loop on this whole lawsuit thing.

I mean, I've tried Kaitlyn four times. No response.

I just... should I call her again?

No, don't do that.

Just take a minute to decompress

and think clearly about your next... no, not there.

The offices are closed anyway, so there's not really much you can do.

Uh, that's good.

No, not you.

But also, maybe you... I don't know. I can't...

Remember what I just said?

I'm sorry. I'm just... i'm trying to put up this exhibit.

Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, no, no. Do yourthing. I'll talk to you later.

Reagan: Okay. Bye.

Oh. Uh, sorry. Excuse me. There's supposed to be a pickle.

The burgers always come with a pickle.

Oh, yes. Yeah. Sorry, we're all out.

Mm. That doesn't work for me at all.

Yeah. Gotta have a pickle. Burger needs a pickle, right?

It's like a gin and tonic.

You can't have one without the other.

Oh, man, sorry.

I've just had a long day and I... that guy has a pickle!

What the hell, man?

Is it too much to ask for some respect and some pickles?

Sir, do I have to ask you toleave?

What? Terry: Alex...

Get a pickle from Kelly's blizzard stash in the back of the pantry.

What... Terry: Now.

Fine.

Thank you.

I worked here in high school.

I have to say, you impressed me

in our meeting earlier today.

You really held it together while I eviscerated Blake.

Well, your conference room looked lovely.

Peonies were a classy touch. Were they fresh?

Fake, but silk. Hmm.

Mm, sure.

I can't believe they only sent one lawyer.

It's literally insane.

He was, like, 14 years old.

Yeah, well, they all start to look young the older we get.

Look, Terry, for what it's worth,

I told him not to underestimate you.

Thank you.

Well, enjoy your meal.

And, uh, all this other stuff,

it'll work itself out.

No black suvs yet.

We still have 22 minutes.

Reagan: History favors the big events.

But it's the little moments in our lives that make us who we are.

Each of these items tells the story of the tribal member who donated it,

and each is a source of pride in our nation.

Thank you so much for coming.

So these beaded emojis indigenize popular culture,

offering an important commentary on the way that native artists

are treated like second class...

Oh, my god. Am I Columbus-ing

and mansplaining at the same time?

When Sally and I first started this cultural center,

it was just an empty room under poor management.

One Clay pot.

That's right, one Clay pot.

Hey, you guys made it!

Yeah, of course. We're not gonna miss the big reopening.

Congratulations.

Thank you. Oh! For me.

I wanted to get you dry hair shampoo,

but Nathan said you'd like this more.

Well, yeah.

Beautiful exhibit.

Thank you.

I know that we started getting these for each other as a joke,

but please never stop.

Oh, I'm not gonna. They're amazing.

Uh-huh.

It's also a bit of an apology for just not showing up to help when you called.

Hey, it's okay.

I know that you've been dealing with all that legal stuff.

And, plus I have Josh.

He is so great, by the way.

Iwnreahyhappy for you. Thanks

and next time you're putting an exhibit together, I will be helping so...

Reagan: What's going on? Nathan: I don't know.

Both: Here we go.