Original subtitles

NOAH: Yeah, of course.

Okay. Tim, you nutter.

To what do I owe the pleasure?

Uh... yeah, I've got five. Yeah, I've got five minutes.

I'm gonna go upstairs for something.

Okay.

NOAH: Yep, okay.

[ Buttons clicking ]

I broke my leg when I was a kid.

All my friends signed my cast.

It was kind of great.

Sometimes I fantasize about it happening again.

I'd get a few weeks off work.

Watch some box sets. Learn a language.

I suppose I'm saying you should see this as an opportunity.

When people ask, what do you want me to tell them?

Say you broke your leg at work?

Did you see that?

It's probably a prank.

- It's stealing. - So phone the police.

MIKE: Yeah, I will.

[ Mug thuds ]

You know, last week I was investigating a kidnapping.

Now look at me.

I'm calling in a stolen garden gnome.

This is gonna be tough.

No work. Just you and your thoughts.

Try not to dwell on them.

Find something to keep yourself busy.

- Yeah. - Yeah?

Okay.

Have a good day. I love you.

See you later.

Bye.

[ Door closes ]

♪ There once was a place with my little lovely ♪

♪ Whey, hey, ho ♪

♪ And I seek and I search, and I know that I'll find it ♪

♪ Whey, hey, ho ♪

♪ I know the wind, she blows ♪

♪ I know the tides are low ♪

♪ But you'll find me at the Whitepost ♪

♪ You'll find me at the Whitepost ♪

[ Birds squawking ]

[ Sighs ]

I'm gonna kill him.

Have you thought about couples therapy?

Nah, I'm gonna chop his balls off.

Alright. Well, before you do that, Kelly,

why don't you tell me why you think he's cheating?

I go to bed early.

When he thinks I'm asleep he creeps out.

Doesn't come back till the early hours.

Have you tried talking to him?

I mean, why don't you ask him where he's going?

I don't want him to think I'm paranoid.

We've only just moved in together.

I'm keeping the crazy in.

Okay, well, um...

I'll follow him, then, see where he's going.

But only if you're really sure you wanna know.

KELLY: Stuart said he hit the jackpot when he met me.

I thought the same thing.

I don't wanna kill him. I love him.

But if he's cheating on me [Exhales deeply]

I swear to God, I'm gonna kick his lovely little head in.

[ Mike slurps ]

[ Doorbell rings ]

[ Indistinct talking ]

[ Thunder crashes ]

[ Rain falling ]

[ Man shouts ]

[ Banging on window ]

[ Indistinct shouting ]

[ Line ringing ]

OPERATOR: Which service do you require?

Police, please.

[ Thunder rumbling ]

[ Doorbell rings ]

[ Buzzer ]

Nikki, I know what I saw.

He suffers from night terrors.

He sees giant spiders and hooded assassins in his sleep.

His eyes were wide open.

His eyes remain open during the night terror.

He can move around, talk.

Sometimes he can be violent. But he is still asleep.

- And he's got no memory of it? - NIKKI: His wife backed him up.

She knows how to reassure him.

They've got it all under control.

Maybe they should try sleeping pills?

NIKKI: They don't believe in medicating the problem.

I said there's something called wasting police time.

And I don't believe in that.

Uh, you telling them or me?

Both.

Please, stop snooping on your neighbors.

Just enjoy your time off.

See you later.

[ Door opens ]

[ Door closes ]

[ Rain falling ]

You didn't have to come, you know.

It might be a long night.

What if he's not just a cheat?

What if he's an ax murderer?

It's my job to look out for you.

Well, say he is an ax murderer. What are you gonna do?

Put him in detention?

I might.

If he's really disappointed me.

[ Laughs ]

Have you ever cheated on anyone?

Wow. Direct question.

It's early days between us, you know.

You're supposed to be keeping the crazy in.

Oh, I think that ship has sailed, don't you?

[ Laughs ]

Have you, though?

No, have you?

When I was married, I got close to someone at work.

PEARL: A teacher?

Did she lock you in the maths cupboard?

- Ha ha. - Take advantage of you.

- It wasn't like that. - Like what?

- Physical. - Oh.

We didn't, you know-- we didn't even kiss.

My therapist called it "emotional infidelity."

Sounds hot.

We shared things.

Hopes. Doubts. Secrets.

There he is.

I'm not proud of it.

Well, give yourself a break. It sounds like nothing happened.

TOM: Yeah, but it did, though, didn't it?

It was intense and intimate.

It was just wrong.

- We're gonna follow him. - TOM: Wait a sec.

I just want you to know I will never do that again.

I know.

[ Engine starts ]

[ Gearshift clicks ]

TOM: Does it ever get you down, chasing cheats?

Well, sometimes you do find evidence

that ends a relationship.

But mostly it's just a misunderstanding.

And those are the best, when you save a relationship.

[ Speaking indistinctly ]

PEARL: Like this time.

Stuart's not a cheat.

He's a trainspotter.

Is that worse?

[ Buzzer ]

[ Doorbell rings ]

[ Buzzer ]

MIKE: He's cheating on his wife.

- The night terror fella. - So what?

MIKE: Well, don't you think it's a little bit suspicious?

It's none of my business.

MIKE: Right, just hear me out, alright?

Alright, this better be good.

MIKE: First of all, he stole a unicorn.

Oh, my God.

Ugh.

[ Camera shutter clicking ]

[ Buttons click ]

[ Line ringing ]

- PEARL: Hi. - MIKE: Pearl. It's me.

I need you to see something.

That's Noah.

- And he has nightmares? - Night terrors.

He jumps around, screams, attacks his wife.

All in his sleep.

What, and he has no memory of it?

Well, so he says.

And that's his wife, Maddie.

She vouched for him to the police, but...

You're not buying it?

Nah. And Jimi lives there.

PEARL: And Jimi's a unicorn?

MIKE: No. Jimi's a DFL. I'll come back to the unicorn.

Jimi works in the city. Only comes back at weekends.

Now, he's given Noah a key so he can go and feed the fish.

Ah, right, but Noah's using it as a shag pad.

Right.

Well, you've done your research.

How do you know all your neighbors' names?

Well, I say hello.

Bit of neighborly small talk every now and then.

Alright. I avoid them at all costs.

But I'm a detective. I who my neighbors are.

Alright, that's Grace.

She takes in Jimi's parcels when he's not there.

Now, Noah, he stole her unicorn.

He just hopped over the fence and took it.

Right.

Okay, never mind about the unicorn.

Look. I took these photos.

I know where this ends. I've seen it a hundred times.

Abusive husbands who think they can take out

all their frustrations on their wives.

- She looks terrified. - MIKE: Yeah.

And at this stage it's difficult for the police to intervene,

so I need help.

You in?

Yeah.

Thanks.

Well, you might not thank me

when you find out what my fees are.

I was thinking we'd have a trial period.

Well, it's the weekend, innit? I'm on double time.

[ Door opens ]

- KAT: Hi! It's only me. - Hey.

Hi, Pearl. You look nice.

Oh, thanks.

- Hi. - Hi.

Oh, I, um, went to the shop and I got you some soups.

It's fuel for your stakeout.

Oh, you didn't have to do that.

You staying?

Saturday night with the Stasi?

- I think I'll pass. - Right.

It looks like a hotbed of criminality over there.

Well, I'd say good luck.

But that would mean you're right

and your neighbor is planning on murdering his wife.

So I hope you're wrong

and that you have a boring and uneventful evening.

What are you up to?

Karaoke with the girls.

- Oh. - Oh, yeah, have a good night.

You're gonna join us when you're better, eh?

Really? I didn't know you did karaoke.

What's your song?

It's power ballads.

[ Both laugh ]

I'll see you later.

- MIKE: Alright. - KAT: Bye, Pearl.

- Bye. - KAT: Love to Tom.

- Yeah. Have fun. - KAT: Thank you.

- See ya. - Bye.

She's alright, isn't she, me being here?

Yeah. Yeah. Kat's cool.

She knows this is just work. It's fine.

Yeah. Of course, yeah.

You hungry?

Yeah.

I could heat those soups up.

Yeah.

Or...

we could get a Chinese?

Yeah, go on.

[ Indistinct conversations ]

Pearl stood you up?

She's 'round at Mike's.

Oh, well done, you.

Most people would feel threatened.

TOM: By Mike?

[ Laughs ] Nah. Trust me.

Not Pearl's type.

She likes a laugh, and between us,

Mike's a bit of a Debbie Downer.

Oh, I wouldn't say that.

Would you, Ruby?

I'd say he's more the strong silent type.

DOLLY: Yes.

Yeah, because he can't think of any words.

DOLLY: No. It's-- He's--

- Mysterious. - That's it.

Strong, silent, mysterious.

- Like James Bond. - Mm.

This is a wind-up.

Yeah. You got me. [ Chuckles ]

Mike's not exactly a catch, is he?

I mean, he's literally lame!

[ As Sean Connery ] James Bond, licensed to hobble.

I know you don't wanna talk about it.

But I have gotta ask.

What, my leg?

Was you injured in the line of duty?

Something like that.

Well, Kat has sworn the swimming group to secrecy.

Oh, yeah?

Yeah, said it was classified.

Case of national security. Made you out like a hero.

Well, she can put a positive spin on anything.

Well, that's a good quality.

I know, just...

We're just different that way.

Uh, yeah.

That's her way of dealing with everything, you know?

Look forward, not back.

Did she lose her partner, too?

Yeah.

I'm sorry.

Is that what you're doing? Looking forwards?

Yeah, I'm trying.

Go on, then, tell me how you did it.

Was it foiling a heist?

Or tackling a terrorist?

I was at work, actually.

- Sort of. - Okay.

It was the police five-a-side tournament.

Well, who did it? Some monster of a cop?

Nikki.

[ Laughs ]

Mike.

Wake up, Mike. Wake up.

- Hmm? - PEARL: He's up, look.

He's got a knife.

Look.

Right, we've gotta do something!

- I'm gonna go 'round there. - No, no, no, no.

- What? - Wait. I'm calling the police.

- PEARL: Mike! - Wait.

PEARL: Look.

What was that?

MIKE: I told you. Something weird's going on.

Is that definitely a night terror?

What if it wasn't?

- What do you mean? - MIKE: What if he isn't asleep?

We don't know for sure.

You're saying he's awake?

If he is asleep, that's odd and dangerous.

If he's awake, then he's conscious.

And he's thinking about killing his wife.

[ Buzzer ]

[ Camera shutter clicking ]

MADDIE: Noah!

You forgot your passport.

[ Indistinct talking ]

[ Engine revs ]

Alright.

NOAH: It's my word against hers.

It's your word against Mia Adler.

But here's the problem.

Now it's your word against Clemmie Dixon,

- Rochelle Dorsey. - NOAH: Yeah, alright.

And they're all saying the same thing.

That you sexually harassed them.

Well, you're the lawyer. What are you saying?

LAWYER: They're going to revoke your pilot's license, so...

what else do you know how to do?

MIKE: Justice? What does that mean?

It's all about sexual harassment in the workplace.

Calling out predators.

So, now he's been sexually harassing flight attendants.

- Yeah, and he got sacked for it. - And he hasn't told Maddie.

No. And he dresses up as a pilot every day

and pretends to go to work.

While really he's next door with her.

PEARL: Yeah, and that's Lois.

And she's the only flight attendant

- that still believes in him. - MIKE: God knows why.

- [ Buzzer ] - Oh. Hold on.

[ Indistinct talking ]

[ Scoffs ]

This guy.

[ Buzzer ]

Follow Lois.

- PEARL: On it. - MIKE: Yeah.

Here you are, spare key so you can let yourself in and out.

- I'll call you later. - Alright.

MIKE: Here, Pearl.

PEARL: Yeah.

You're not bad at this.

I know.

Double time, remember?

[ Door opens ]

Oh, no.

- What are you doing? - What?

He didn't?

And you didn't?

What?

'Cause listen, Pearl.

I watched him having lunch the other day,

and he ate his burger with a knife and fork.

- Who? - Tom!

Well, he's got manners!

Oh. You think because I'm--

[ Laughs ]

Please tell me you're not.

Oh, no. We are, actually.

Yeah, we're gonna go to Vegas, dress up as Elvis and Priscilla.

Don't even joke about it.

[ Chuckles ]

And you're not invited!

Yeah, 'course I'm sure.

I mean, she's barley showing, but she's pregnant.

Noah's the father.

PEARL: Yeah, and they're getting married.

- Well, Lois thinks they are. - MIKE: Right.

Mike?

Hang on. Yeah?

I'm tired. I'm gonna go to bed.

Alright, yeah.

Pearl, sorry, go on.

PEARL: And I've checked the deeds for the flat,

and it's in Maddie's name.

MIKE: And Noah doesn't own the flat.

No, but if she died, he'd inherit it.

[ Door slams ]

So he's out of work. He's skint.

He's planning on remarrying.

Yeah, and he's got a kid on the way.

- MIKE: That's motive. - Mm.

What are they up to now?

They're arguing.

Jimi's back for the weekend, struggling with a flat pack.

Grace has been on the vodka.

[ Pearl laughs ]

Maybe she's celebrating getting her unicorn back.

Poor Jimi.

Night, then.

PEARL: Yeah, night.

[ Laughter, indistinct conversation ]

[ Van door opens ]

[ Buzzer ]

[ Buzzer ]

[ Glass shatters ]

[ Birds chirping ]

[ Yawns ]

[ Camera shutter clicking ]

And the blinds have been shut for a whole day?

And the curtains drawn the whole time.

And no one's been out?

How bad was this argument?

It was bad.

Smashed plates. Broken glass.

Noah punched the wall in.

We should call the police.

We do that, Nikki'll break my other leg.

Something's happened!

I'm-- I'm gonna go over there.

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. No, Pearl, Pearl, wait!

- Pearl! Pearl! - [ Door closes ]

[ Buzzer ]

PEARL: Meter reading.

[ Buzzer ]

[ Sighs ] Jesus Christ.

[ Doorbell ringing ]

Maddie?

[ Knocking on door ]

Maddie?

No, no, no, no.

Oh, Pearl.

[ Breathing shakily ]

[ Siren chirps ]

[ Vehicle door closes ]

[ Indistinct talking ]

[ Radio chatter ]

[ Vehicle doors close ]

[ Indistinct talking ]

NIKKI: Maddie said she woke up, Noah was standing over her.

And he was holding the kitchen knife.

MIKE: Not for the first time.

Yeah, well, she's still in shock, obviously,

but she's not sure what happened next.

It's a bit of a blur.

She thinks it was a night terror.

He attacks her with a kitchen knife.

There's a scuffle. She tries to grab the knife.

And when they're grappling for it, she stabs him.

So it's self-defense, an accident.

It's looking that way.

The photos are gonna help.

So, I'm glad you broke your leg.

I don't buy any of this.

He was cheating on her.

His girlfriend was pregnant. He had motive to kill her.

She said it was a night terror.

She's heartbroken.

I guess we'll never know.

Either way, you tried to warn me.

And now someone's dead.

- Nikki. - NIKKI: It's okay.

I'm owning it.

I'm just relieved it wasn't Maddie, you know?

[ Buzzer ]

[ Buzzer ]

MADDIE: Hello?

Hi, Maddie. It's Pearl.

I'll buzz you in.

[ Buzzer ]

I didn't think your mind would be on cooking.

So I made you a fish pie.

Oh, thanks.

That's nice of you.

How are you?

Uh, oh, I don't know.

Just taking it a day at a time.

I'm gonna speak to someone.

Well, don't rush anything. Take your time.

[ Muffled talking, laughter ]

[ Chuckles ] They're getting on well.

Oh, it's Jimi and Grace.

Falling in love over garden ornaments.

[ Chuckles ]

Oh, there's Mike.

When he moved in, I remember people saying,

"Oh, no, you've got the Old Bill watching your every move."

I didn't think much of it.

But now it's...

I'm glad he was here.

I-I'm glad you were both there.

It's comforting.

To think there's someone looking out for you.

Thanks, Pearl.

Where to now? Another bar?

The railway bridge.

A new high speed's coming through.

Oh. Right.

Yeah, I'm getting into it, the trainspotting.

We get a bit of QT while we're waiting.

When it's cold, we cuddle up.

You know, it's better than what I thought.

- I'm glad. - Well, I'm glad, too.

I didn't kill him before I came to you!

Keep the crazy in, Kelly.

KELLY: Oh, we're past all that. We're trainspotters.

The crazy is out!

[ Laughs ]

Oh, look at him.

So cute.

But that wouldn't have saved him.

If he'd been cheating, I'd have killed him.

I would! I'd have carved him up.

Sorry.

I'll see you later.

[ Indistinct conversations ]

[ Doorbell buzzes ]

Hi.

Um, Pearl brought this 'round.

And, uh, it was just too much for one person.

So I thought you might want some.

I could heat it up for you.

Oh, th-there's no need. Really.

MADDIE: No, it's just--

It's just to say thanks.

Yeah, come in.

Yeah?

- Um... - Oh, uh, kitchen's

- just on your left there. - Oh.

[ Door closes ]

[ Button beeps, microwave whirring ]

Sorry about the mess. I wasn't expecting anyone.

No, no, it's, um...

You alright?

Yeah. Yeah.

- Um... - How you doing?

Oh, you know, just...

good days and bad.

Yeah, I know the feeling.

It's just strange being at home.

[ Dog barking in distance ]

They're finally getting together.

MADDIE: Yeah. Falling in love over garden ornaments.

[ Mike laughs ]

That's what, um, Jimi called them.

Grace corrected him.

Apparently they're, um, solar mood animals.

Oh. [ Chuckles ]

They were laughing about it.

What, you can hear 'em through the wall?

Yeah.

[ Microwave beeps ]

[ Cellphone ringing, buzzing ]

Hello?

PEARL: I went 'round to see Maddie earlier

and I could see you in your apartment

even though the lights were off.

I think she knew.

I think she knew you were watching.

Yeah. Go on.

I went 'round to take her some food, right?

- Fish pie. - PEARL: Yeah.

And I could hear Grace next door at Jimi's.

You could hear everything. Maddie must've known.

She must have been able to hear Noah when he was with Lois.

She knew they were having an affair.

What if we got it wrong?

We said that Noah was using the night terrors

as a cover for murder, but what if it was Maddie?

She knew you were watching.

And she knew we'd back up her story.

I think she's playing us. I'm gonna call the police.

Yeah, good idea.

Wait, how did you know it was a fish pie?

And why are you whispering?

Mike?

Don't.

You don't have to tell anyone.

Noah was a cheat.

He-- He was a liar.

He-- He was a horrible person.

Y-You know about the sexual assault accusations.

He thought he could get away with anything.

- Look. - He must've known I could hear.

Not necessarily. I mean, Jimi lived on his own.

He-- He was barely there.

Noah was with her next door.

Next door to our home.

You imagine how that felt.

So don't.

Just don't tell anyone.

Who was on the phone?

The police?

Maddie, I know what you've done.

[ Lock clicks ]

Don't!

Maddie.

Maddie, put it down.

Don't make this worse.

[ Breathing shakily ]

Maddie.

Please.

Maddie.

MIKE: It's alright.

It's okay, it's okay.

Give it to me.

- I'm sorry. - Okay.

It's over.

[ Sobbing ]

[ Police radio chatter ]

[ Indistinct talking ]

You alright?

It's been, um...

Yeah. It has, yeah.

Thanks.

[ Door opens, footsteps ]

I'd better go.

Yeah.

- PEARL: I'll see you later. - Alright.

[ Door closes ]

She saved your bacon, mate.

Disarming a murderer.

She's something else.

Yeah, she is.

Your statement can wait till tomorrow.

Get some rest.

Alright.

NIKKI: See ya.

[ Door opens ]

[ Door closes ]

TOM: So you saved Mike's life.

No. She was pretty scared.

I don't think she'd have done anything.

Oh, come on. You completely took down a killer.

And you solved the case for him.

Well, we did it together.

Mm, no. You're being modest.

- We did. - You figured everything out.

The thin walls, the way she could see Mike the whole time.

What did he do?

Apart from invite the killer inside

and nearly get himself murdered.

[ Laughs ] Yeah. You're right.

- It was mostly me. - Mm.

But it's all done now, alright, this case?

The, um-- The late-night stakeouts.

Yeah. The case is closed.

Do you think about it often, being a cop again?

All the time.

Well, Mike ought to be worried.

'Cause you'd have his job in no time.

- [ Chuckles ]

- Cheers. - [ Glasses clink ]

DOLLY: I don't get it.

She looks happy.

[ Pearl laughs, speaks indistinctly ]

CHARLIE: She is happy.

Tom's a-a nice guy.

Just, uh, give him a chance.

[ Pearl laughs ]

[ Indistinct conversation ]

[ Exhales deeply ] Come on.

If I was a racehorse, they'd shoot me.

[ Laughs ] That's the spirit.

[ Exhales deeply ] Come on.

There you go!

You're doing it!

- You're back in action. - [ Grunts ]

♪ La la la la la ♪

♪ La la-la la la-la la la ♪

♪ La la la la la ♪

♪ La la-la la la-la la la ♪

♪ Ooh ♪

♪ La la-la la la-la la la ♪

♪ Ooh ♪

♪ La la-la la la-la la la ♪

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