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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:02:26,102 --> 00:02:27,729 Consider outer space. 2 00:02:27,979 --> 00:02:30,899 From the time of the first NASA mission, it became evident... 3 00:02:30,941 --> 00:02:34,569 that being in space has a profound effect on the human psyche. 4 00:02:34,653 --> 00:02:37,948 During the first Gemini mission, some thought was actually given... 5 00:02:38,031 --> 00:02:41,284 to the notion of sending up a man and a woman together. 6 00:02:41,493 --> 00:02:42,619 Really? 7 00:02:43,578 --> 00:02:45,997 A cosmic Adam and Eve, if you will... 8 00:02:46,706 --> 00:02:49,042 bound together in a sophisticated nerve center... 9 00:02:49,125 --> 00:02:51,628 at the head of the largest, most powerful known rocket... 10 00:02:51,670 --> 00:02:54,548 its giant thrusters blasting into the dark void... 11 00:02:54,589 --> 00:02:57,425 as they hurtled towards their final destination: 12 00:02:57,467 --> 00:02:59,469 the gushing wellspring of life itself. 13 00:03:01,263 --> 00:03:03,473 How would you like a sexual encounter so intense... 14 00:03:03,557 --> 00:03:05,934 it could conceivably change your political views? 15 00:03:07,727 --> 00:03:10,230 -Would you like to dance? -Yes, please. 16 00:03:11,189 --> 00:03:13,024 I'll take that as a no. 17 00:03:25,036 --> 00:03:27,539 -Consider outer space. -What? 18 00:03:36,548 --> 00:03:38,967 Private Gibson! Incoming! 19 00:03:41,803 --> 00:03:44,472 What is this? "Lonely man sitting on a hill"? 20 00:03:46,725 --> 00:03:48,268 It's over, Lance. 21 00:03:49,060 --> 00:03:50,437 It's gone, I've lost it. 22 00:03:51,730 --> 00:03:53,106 High school. 23 00:03:53,607 --> 00:03:56,568 I started off so hot. Sophomore year, two times. 24 00:03:57,235 --> 00:03:59,779 Junior year was excellent. Four times. 25 00:04:00,071 --> 00:04:02,282 And not all with the same girl. 26 00:04:02,824 --> 00:04:07,037 Senior year looked like the best. The first day of classes, then nothing. 27 00:04:07,204 --> 00:04:09,831 What do you mean, nothing your senior year? 28 00:04:09,915 --> 00:04:12,959 What about that time with Barbara DeVillebis in the high-jump pit? 29 00:04:13,043 --> 00:04:14,461 That was you. 30 00:04:18,465 --> 00:04:21,384 I just can't motivate myself the way I used to. 31 00:04:22,594 --> 00:04:24,471 Maybe I'm past my prime. 32 00:04:25,597 --> 00:04:28,892 It's not you. It's these high school girls, here. 33 00:04:29,893 --> 00:04:31,311 They're simple. 34 00:04:32,062 --> 00:04:35,232 They're never gonna stimulate a complex guy like you. 35 00:04:36,441 --> 00:04:38,568 -Maybe you're right. -Of course I'm right. 36 00:04:38,610 --> 00:04:39,778 Anyways... 37 00:04:39,945 --> 00:04:44,199 after tonight, you'll never have to deal with these simple high school girls again. 38 00:04:45,575 --> 00:04:49,621 -But won't these same girls be in college? -Yeah, but it'll be different. 39 00:04:49,704 --> 00:04:52,290 -Why? -Because they'll be college girls. 40 00:04:55,085 --> 00:04:56,670 I'm gonna miss you. 41 00:04:57,337 --> 00:05:01,299 It's your own fault. You could be coming out to California with me. 42 00:05:01,341 --> 00:05:02,509 Yeah, right. 43 00:05:02,592 --> 00:05:05,303 Get a totally bitchin' education out there, dude. 44 00:05:05,637 --> 00:05:06,930 California. 45 00:05:07,514 --> 00:05:09,808 You could be coming to New England with me. 46 00:05:09,849 --> 00:05:12,561 What are you, crazy? The lvy League stinks. 47 00:05:12,936 --> 00:05:15,272 They've only got those ugly, intellectual girls... 48 00:05:15,355 --> 00:05:18,900 with Band-Aids on their knees from playing the cello. No, thank you. 49 00:05:19,109 --> 00:05:21,027 I'm really gonna miss you. 50 00:05:21,820 --> 00:05:23,572 We're college men now. 51 00:05:34,165 --> 00:05:37,002 Dear Lance, the campus here is beautiful. 52 00:05:37,836 --> 00:05:40,797 I've never seen so much corduroy in one place. 53 00:05:41,631 --> 00:05:43,383 Classes are classes. 54 00:05:43,675 --> 00:05:46,845 One of them even looks like it might be interesting. 55 00:05:47,762 --> 00:05:49,014 You never know. 56 00:05:50,432 --> 00:05:54,227 You're wrong about the women here. I haven't seen one Band-Aid. 57 00:05:54,269 --> 00:05:56,313 In fact, there's plenty of action. 58 00:05:56,396 --> 00:05:58,857 My roommate and I have an understanding. 59 00:05:59,232 --> 00:06:02,527 Hope things are going as good for you. Your pal, Gib. 60 00:06:03,695 --> 00:06:05,989 P.S. All of the above is bullshit. 61 00:06:06,531 --> 00:06:09,701 I'm floundering in a sea of confusion and total despair. 62 00:06:09,784 --> 00:06:12,329 But, knock on wood, I still have my health. 63 00:06:12,537 --> 00:06:15,707 This week's assignment is to rewrite last week's assignment. 64 00:06:15,874 --> 00:06:19,044 Remember, "As the dog returneth to his own vomit... 65 00:06:19,669 --> 00:06:21,922 "so does the fool to his folly." 66 00:06:25,258 --> 00:06:28,303 Sorry I'm late, but there was this big problem... 67 00:06:28,511 --> 00:06:29,971 and I'm late because of it. 68 00:06:32,515 --> 00:06:36,102 Katherine, when I told you that you should develop your own style... 69 00:06:36,186 --> 00:06:39,773 I didn't mean that you should dot the i's with little flowers. 70 00:06:39,856 --> 00:06:43,318 And this lavender ink.... Would you lose that? 71 00:06:43,568 --> 00:06:45,195 It strains the eye. 72 00:06:45,403 --> 00:06:47,322 You sure take a lot of notes. 73 00:06:50,283 --> 00:06:53,703 Miss Duran, this is very interesting. 74 00:06:54,329 --> 00:06:57,832 Ordinarily, the conclusion comes in the end of the paper, but.... 75 00:06:58,208 --> 00:07:00,001 -I like that. -Thank you. 76 00:07:00,043 --> 00:07:01,169 Go on. 77 00:07:01,962 --> 00:07:02,879 Gibson. 78 00:07:09,719 --> 00:07:11,555 -Mr. Gibson? -Yes, what? 79 00:07:11,888 --> 00:07:15,767 I know what an important part voyeurism plays in your daily life... 80 00:07:15,850 --> 00:07:18,603 but would you mind if I take up a moment of your time? 81 00:07:19,563 --> 00:07:21,147 -Sure. -Thank you. 82 00:07:21,481 --> 00:07:23,358 See, I want to tell you... 83 00:07:24,192 --> 00:07:25,569 that I really enjoyed your paper. 84 00:07:25,652 --> 00:07:26,653 -You did? -Yeah. 85 00:07:26,736 --> 00:07:28,989 I don't remember the last time... 86 00:07:29,072 --> 00:07:32,868 that I have seen this much detail expressed on: 87 00:07:33,201 --> 00:07:36,788 "How to eat pizza without burning the roof of your mouth." 88 00:07:39,207 --> 00:07:43,336 Unfortunately, whatever whimsical qualities that your paper evokes... 89 00:07:44,421 --> 00:07:48,508 are obscured in a morass of marginal grammar... 90 00:07:48,800 --> 00:07:50,468 creative spelling... 91 00:07:51,177 --> 00:07:53,388 and, as I believe, sausage stain. 92 00:07:53,805 --> 00:07:55,098 Pepperoni. 93 00:07:55,932 --> 00:07:57,601 Clean it up. 94 00:07:59,019 --> 00:07:59,978 Ms. Bradbury. 95 00:08:01,313 --> 00:08:03,148 You, on the other hand... 96 00:08:03,231 --> 00:08:05,942 express your ideas very clearly. 97 00:08:06,401 --> 00:08:07,694 Thank you. 98 00:08:08,194 --> 00:08:10,280 Except that your paper is.... 99 00:08:10,947 --> 00:08:12,407 Well, it's dry. 100 00:08:13,074 --> 00:08:15,785 There's not enough of you coming through. 101 00:08:16,411 --> 00:08:18,788 Loosen up, Alison. Have some fun. 102 00:08:19,497 --> 00:08:22,292 Sleep when you feel like it, not when you think you should. 103 00:08:22,334 --> 00:08:25,253 Eat food that is bad for you, at least once in a while. 104 00:08:25,629 --> 00:08:29,799 Have conversations with people whose clothes are not color coordinated. 105 00:08:30,592 --> 00:08:32,761 Make love in a hammock! 106 00:08:37,057 --> 00:08:39,559 Life is the ultimate experience. 107 00:08:40,268 --> 00:08:42,479 You have to experience it... 108 00:08:42,562 --> 00:08:44,564 in order to write about it. 109 00:08:45,899 --> 00:08:48,777 -Yes, Alison. -What did you say after "hammock"? 110 00:08:50,654 --> 00:08:51,947 -I want you. -All right. 111 00:08:51,988 --> 00:08:54,491 You're a dead man, dead meat. You'll hear footsteps. 112 00:08:54,574 --> 00:08:55,575 Set! 113 00:08:56,910 --> 00:08:59,746 One, one thousand, two, one thousand, three, one thousand. 114 00:09:03,458 --> 00:09:07,254 Gibson, all-pro safety out of Grambling, makes another sparkling defensive jam. 115 00:09:08,713 --> 00:09:11,132 -I thought Grambling was all black. -So what? 116 00:09:11,216 --> 00:09:12,592 What are you doing tonight? 117 00:09:12,676 --> 00:09:16,179 I'll tell you, I am not rewriting my English paper. I have a social life. 118 00:09:16,263 --> 00:09:19,224 That's right, I forgot. You've got to go to a mixer. 119 00:09:19,349 --> 00:09:22,352 Stand in the corner for three hours, and not ask anyone to dance. 120 00:09:22,435 --> 00:09:24,187 It's the girls at this school. 121 00:09:24,229 --> 00:09:28,066 All they want is to stay indoors, smoke cigarettes and relate. I don't like them. 122 00:09:28,108 --> 00:09:30,151 Why do you have to like them? 123 00:09:33,029 --> 00:09:34,072 You're dead meat. 124 00:09:34,614 --> 00:09:37,158 What does Taub mean, I have to live life? 125 00:09:37,242 --> 00:09:40,745 In high school, I was delegate to the mock UN in New York City. 126 00:09:40,912 --> 00:09:42,038 Twice. 127 00:09:42,581 --> 00:09:45,625 When I was nine, I broke my brother's nose, boxing. 128 00:09:46,209 --> 00:09:49,296 On a tour of Graceland, I passed out in Elvis' bedroom. 129 00:09:50,589 --> 00:09:53,508 I think I've done my share of living, haven't l? 130 00:09:53,550 --> 00:09:56,553 -What do you think of that guy Gib? -I don't. 131 00:09:57,846 --> 00:09:59,890 I think he's got a cute ass. 132 00:10:00,765 --> 00:10:02,100 -Him? -Yeah. 133 00:10:03,894 --> 00:10:06,771 Gibson, with the interception! And he's got some running room! 134 00:10:06,813 --> 00:10:08,732 He's to the 30, to the 40... 135 00:10:08,815 --> 00:10:12,611 and he's run out of bounds at midfield by Jimbo Maccavechi! 136 00:10:13,194 --> 00:10:15,906 That's Gibson's 9th interception of this very young season. 137 00:10:15,947 --> 00:10:18,200 He's having an outstanding year. 138 00:10:18,867 --> 00:10:21,036 "Life's the ultimate experience." 139 00:10:23,371 --> 00:10:25,457 Forget it. She likes the intellectual type. 140 00:10:25,540 --> 00:10:27,375 I'm intellectual, and stuff. 141 00:10:27,417 --> 00:10:30,629 You're flunking English. That's your mother tongue, and stuff. 142 00:10:31,171 --> 00:10:33,882 The only way she'd go out with you is out of pity. 143 00:10:34,007 --> 00:10:37,427 -Mastin, you're a genius. -Stop and go, on 1. 144 00:10:41,223 --> 00:10:42,349 Break! 145 00:10:42,474 --> 00:10:44,601 -Both y'all are dead. -Ready down. Set. 146 00:10:44,684 --> 00:10:47,270 -Hut one. Hut two. Hut three. -Watch it, now. 147 00:10:47,354 --> 00:10:50,232 One, one thousand, two, one thousand, three, one thousand. 148 00:10:52,692 --> 00:10:54,194 -Nice D. -Go! 149 00:10:56,863 --> 00:10:57,948 Nice. 150 00:10:58,448 --> 00:11:00,367 -Where are you going? -Come on! 151 00:11:01,326 --> 00:11:02,577 The ball! 152 00:11:15,757 --> 00:11:19,594 I'm flunking English. I was wondering if maybe you could help me out. 153 00:11:20,387 --> 00:11:21,805 Nice swimsuit. 154 00:11:23,557 --> 00:11:25,767 If I flunk English, I'm out of here. 155 00:11:26,309 --> 00:11:28,061 Kiss college goodbye. 156 00:11:31,106 --> 00:11:33,024 I don't know what I'll do. 157 00:11:33,775 --> 00:11:35,527 I'll probably go home. 158 00:11:36,236 --> 00:11:39,948 Gee, Dad will be pissed off. Mom will be heartbroken. 159 00:11:40,365 --> 00:11:44,327 If I play my cards right, I get maybe a six-month's grace period... 160 00:11:44,411 --> 00:11:47,998 and then I got to get a job, and you know what that means. 161 00:11:50,125 --> 00:11:53,420 That's right. They start me off at the drive-up window... 162 00:11:53,503 --> 00:11:55,589 and I work my way up from shakes to burgers... 163 00:11:55,630 --> 00:11:57,716 and then, one day, my lucky break comes. 164 00:11:57,799 --> 00:12:00,886 The French fry guy dies, and they offer me the job. 165 00:12:00,969 --> 00:12:04,431 But the day I have to start, some men come in a black Lincoln Continental... 166 00:12:04,514 --> 00:12:08,935 and tell me I can make a quick $300 just for driving a van back from Mexico. 167 00:12:09,978 --> 00:12:13,356 When I get out of jail, I'm 36 years old... 168 00:12:14,190 --> 00:12:16,818 Iiving in a flophouse. No job... 169 00:12:17,027 --> 00:12:20,197 no home, no upward mobility, very few teeth. 170 00:12:20,405 --> 00:12:22,782 Then one day they find me, face down... 171 00:12:22,824 --> 00:12:26,536 talking to the gutter, clutching a bottle of paint thinner. And why? 172 00:12:26,995 --> 00:12:29,414 Because you wouldn't help me in English. No! 173 00:12:29,497 --> 00:12:31,499 You were too busy to help me! 174 00:12:31,833 --> 00:12:34,377 Too busy to help a drowning man! 175 00:12:57,359 --> 00:12:58,401 Okay. 176 00:12:59,527 --> 00:13:01,905 -Okay, what? -Okay, I'll help you. 177 00:13:02,572 --> 00:13:03,782 You will? 178 00:13:05,367 --> 00:13:06,409 When? 179 00:13:08,036 --> 00:13:09,663 How about tonight? 180 00:13:13,333 --> 00:13:14,918 Let's see. Friday. 181 00:13:15,710 --> 00:13:18,588 5:30, dinner. 6:00, calculus. 182 00:13:21,466 --> 00:13:23,635 7:00, news. 7:30, shower. 183 00:13:23,969 --> 00:13:26,555 7:45, phone call. 8:00? 184 00:13:27,389 --> 00:13:30,517 8:00, I don't know. That's when I rearrange my sock drawer. 185 00:13:31,268 --> 00:13:34,187 -Do you want me to help you, or not? -I do. 186 00:13:34,437 --> 00:13:35,897 I was just kidding, there. 187 00:13:36,398 --> 00:13:38,441 -8:00. -Okay. 188 00:13:40,777 --> 00:13:42,153 See you then. 189 00:13:42,988 --> 00:13:45,323 -Where? -McKenzie Hall. 190 00:13:45,949 --> 00:13:47,033 Great! 191 00:13:54,457 --> 00:13:56,167 It's Friday night! 192 00:14:06,553 --> 00:14:09,514 "I'm a freshman at a small Northeastern college. 193 00:14:09,806 --> 00:14:12,809 "l never thought those letters were true, until a few days ago... 194 00:14:12,851 --> 00:14:15,520 "l had an experience that changed my mind. 195 00:14:15,562 --> 00:14:17,314 "l just had to share it with you. 196 00:14:17,397 --> 00:14:20,483 "l had resigned myself to another night of reading your magazine... 197 00:14:20,567 --> 00:14:23,361 "when there was a knock on my dorm room door. 198 00:14:23,403 --> 00:14:26,990 "And when I opened the door, I could hardly believe my eyes. 199 00:14:27,324 --> 00:14:30,577 "There were two of the foxiest twins I had ever seen... 200 00:14:31,369 --> 00:14:34,539 "with long brunette hair, legs that wouldn't quit... 201 00:14:35,457 --> 00:14:36,958 "and firm tits." 202 00:14:40,003 --> 00:14:41,588 How does that sound? 203 00:14:41,630 --> 00:14:44,925 Change "tits" to "generous scoops of mouthwatering flesh." 204 00:14:45,008 --> 00:14:46,509 And have them defy gravity. 205 00:14:46,593 --> 00:14:47,886 Is this shirt good? 206 00:14:48,053 --> 00:14:51,097 Yeah. You think they'll know that "scoops of flesh" means "tits"? 207 00:14:51,181 --> 00:14:53,308 I don't think it sounds specific enough. 208 00:14:53,308 --> 00:14:55,560 Where else are you gonna find scoops of flesh? 209 00:14:55,644 --> 00:14:57,520 How's this for an opening line: 210 00:14:57,604 --> 00:14:59,856 "Did you know that Nietzsche died of syphilis?" 211 00:14:59,940 --> 00:15:02,817 -How do you spell "zucchini"? -Z-u-c-h-i-n-i. 212 00:15:03,526 --> 00:15:05,028 Nietzsche's too obscure. 213 00:15:05,111 --> 00:15:08,615 How about, "Did you know that Shakespeare died of syphilis?" 214 00:15:09,115 --> 00:15:12,452 She probably knows it isn't true. I don't know what to say. 215 00:15:12,536 --> 00:15:15,705 It's not what you say that counts, but how you say it. 216 00:15:15,789 --> 00:15:18,667 -Use sincerity. It's the best technique. -What? 217 00:15:21,002 --> 00:15:22,295 Come here. 218 00:15:30,262 --> 00:15:33,223 You know, I've never met anyone like you before. 219 00:15:35,392 --> 00:15:38,728 Usually, when I meet someone new, I feel awkward and shy. 220 00:15:39,229 --> 00:15:41,273 But with you, it's different. 221 00:15:41,648 --> 00:15:43,191 I can talk to you. 222 00:15:44,067 --> 00:15:48,697 You know what I'm thinking, without my having to explain it to you in fancy terms. 223 00:15:49,281 --> 00:15:51,950 We speak each other's unspoken language... 224 00:15:53,243 --> 00:15:54,452 fluently. 225 00:15:55,954 --> 00:15:57,289 I love you. 226 00:15:59,875 --> 00:16:03,962 That is the most enormous pile of horseshit I've ever heard in my life. 227 00:16:04,671 --> 00:16:07,757 -Get out of here, you piece of slime. -No chick would ever buy it. 228 00:16:07,841 --> 00:16:10,677 That's where you're wrong. It's how I got Lucy. 229 00:16:10,802 --> 00:16:12,929 -It's horseshit. -Effective horseshit. 230 00:16:13,013 --> 00:16:14,306 Get a life. 231 00:16:25,525 --> 00:16:27,068 It's true. 232 00:16:43,627 --> 00:16:44,878 It's open. 233 00:16:54,095 --> 00:16:58,600 I'm so far behind, I haven't even picked out a theme for my English Lit term paper. 234 00:16:58,934 --> 00:17:01,603 Of course I'm still coming out there for Christmas. 235 00:17:01,645 --> 00:17:05,315 You think I'm gonna leave you alone with all those UCLA girls? 236 00:17:05,398 --> 00:17:09,277 I just can't afford to fly. My parents will only pay if I go to see them. 237 00:17:09,361 --> 00:17:11,988 Don't worry. I'll figure something out. 238 00:17:12,030 --> 00:17:15,200 They have this bulletin board where they list rides. 239 00:17:15,283 --> 00:17:17,410 I really want to see you. 240 00:17:25,043 --> 00:17:28,672 I will send you the article on civil liability, I promise. 241 00:17:29,256 --> 00:17:30,215 Jason? 242 00:17:31,550 --> 00:17:34,678 Do you ever eat food that you think is bad for you? 243 00:17:36,012 --> 00:17:38,682 I didn't think so. It's not important. 244 00:17:41,351 --> 00:17:42,936 You tell me first. 245 00:17:45,397 --> 00:17:46,940 I love you, too. 246 00:17:49,860 --> 00:17:51,027 'Bye. 247 00:17:55,907 --> 00:17:58,243 -Who's that, your lawyer? -Someday. 248 00:18:01,705 --> 00:18:03,039 -Ready? -Yeah. 249 00:18:11,381 --> 00:18:14,467 "When I recollect my most truly excellent experience... 250 00:18:14,509 --> 00:18:17,137 "recurrent images buzz through my brain: 251 00:18:17,971 --> 00:18:21,808 "the big bubbles of crust that expand right up through the sauce... 252 00:18:21,892 --> 00:18:25,896 "glistening pools of oil as still and inviting as a mountain... 253 00:18:28,231 --> 00:18:29,357 "lake... 254 00:18:30,650 --> 00:18:33,612 "the ropy knots of cheese that gather to a chewy perfection... 255 00:18:33,653 --> 00:18:36,573 "in the center as the slices are pulled apart." 256 00:18:36,823 --> 00:18:39,576 -It's good. -This is all wrong. 257 00:18:39,659 --> 00:18:42,537 There's no punctuation. It's all one sentence. 258 00:18:42,954 --> 00:18:44,831 -So? -It's a mess. 259 00:18:45,540 --> 00:18:48,043 You neglected to mention the most important thing. 260 00:18:48,126 --> 00:18:50,420 I talk about the cheese-to-sauce ratio right there. 261 00:18:50,462 --> 00:18:54,090 You didn't state your topic, that this is gonna be a paper on pizza. 262 00:18:54,466 --> 00:18:56,635 But that is completely inferred. 263 00:18:57,010 --> 00:18:58,178 -lmplied. -Whatever. 264 00:18:58,261 --> 00:19:01,514 Look, what do you say we blow this off and go exploring? 265 00:19:01,598 --> 00:19:03,808 Nothing gets done on a Friday night. Come on. 266 00:19:03,892 --> 00:19:05,268 Where are you going? 267 00:19:05,435 --> 00:19:07,437 It's too stuffy, let's go get some air. 268 00:19:13,318 --> 00:19:16,238 -You can't go in there. -I can. 269 00:19:16,821 --> 00:19:18,657 This is America, you can go anywhere. 270 00:19:39,761 --> 00:19:42,472 -We're not supposed to be up here. -See that? 271 00:19:42,556 --> 00:19:44,808 That's Ursa Major, the Big Bear. 272 00:19:45,308 --> 00:19:48,436 -We could get into trouble. -That's Ursa Minor, the Little Bear. 273 00:19:48,520 --> 00:19:51,189 Up to the north there, that's Cassiopeia. 274 00:19:51,731 --> 00:19:53,316 That's Cassiopeia? 275 00:19:54,109 --> 00:19:56,945 -She was the mother of Andromeda, right? -Who? 276 00:19:57,737 --> 00:20:00,490 -Cassiopeia. -Really? I just know the names. 277 00:20:00,866 --> 00:20:03,535 Andromeda's there, too, next to Cassiopeia. 278 00:20:03,869 --> 00:20:07,372 Andromeda. She was the princess who was chained to a rock. 279 00:20:08,206 --> 00:20:10,208 She was to be sacrificed to a sea serpent. 280 00:20:10,292 --> 00:20:11,960 -Did he get her? -No. 281 00:20:12,210 --> 00:20:15,630 -Perseus rescued her at the last minute. -Perseus, good man. 282 00:20:15,714 --> 00:20:18,216 He's up there, too, next to Andromeda. 283 00:20:19,092 --> 00:20:21,595 -You know a lot about astronomy. -Yeah. 284 00:20:22,804 --> 00:20:25,307 When I was six, I wanted to be an astronaut. 285 00:20:25,348 --> 00:20:27,851 You know, all the Tang you can drink. 286 00:20:29,644 --> 00:20:32,480 You'll never believe what I wanted to be when I was six. 287 00:20:32,522 --> 00:20:34,482 -A classics professor. -No. 288 00:20:36,276 --> 00:20:38,195 I wanted to be a princess. 289 00:20:49,497 --> 00:20:52,709 You know, Alison, I never met anyone like you before. 290 00:20:54,127 --> 00:20:57,547 Usually, when I meet someone new, I feel awkward and shy. 291 00:20:57,964 --> 00:21:01,259 But with you it's different. I feel I can talk to you. 292 00:21:02,135 --> 00:21:06,723 You know what I'm thinking, without me having to explain it to you in fancy terms. 293 00:21:06,806 --> 00:21:09,434 We speak each other's unspoken language... 294 00:21:09,643 --> 00:21:11,228 -What? -...fluently. 295 00:21:13,021 --> 00:21:14,272 I love you. 296 00:21:15,232 --> 00:21:16,316 What? 297 00:21:17,317 --> 00:21:19,027 -Did I hurt you? -No. 298 00:21:20,570 --> 00:21:21,655 I'm sorry! 299 00:21:21,738 --> 00:21:24,533 You're not. You had this whole thing planned. 300 00:21:26,201 --> 00:21:27,452 Excellent. 301 00:21:34,125 --> 00:21:36,086 -What? -Don't you have an 8:00? 302 00:21:36,211 --> 00:21:38,046 -What time is it? -7:51. 303 00:21:38,755 --> 00:21:39,798 Shit! 304 00:21:42,384 --> 00:21:43,510 Oh, God! 305 00:22:07,284 --> 00:22:08,493 Wait up. 306 00:22:12,414 --> 00:22:14,875 I feel really terrible about Friday night. 307 00:22:15,166 --> 00:22:18,044 I was rude, insensitive, selfish.... 308 00:22:18,169 --> 00:22:19,713 -Asshole. -Exactly. 309 00:22:20,505 --> 00:22:21,882 But that wasn't me. 310 00:22:21,965 --> 00:22:26,136 I don't know why I said those things, I'm really not like that. Please. 311 00:22:27,220 --> 00:22:28,763 I'm really sorry. 312 00:22:29,723 --> 00:22:31,349 Can you forgive me? 313 00:22:31,641 --> 00:22:32,809 Please. 314 00:22:35,812 --> 00:22:38,398 Come on, we're gonna be late for class. 315 00:22:41,818 --> 00:22:43,403 "He was a man, that's all. 316 00:22:43,904 --> 00:22:45,572 "A man like any other man. 317 00:22:46,615 --> 00:22:48,825 "A man like no other man." 318 00:22:51,995 --> 00:22:54,080 -That's very interesting, Marsha. -Thanks. 319 00:22:55,832 --> 00:22:57,959 You have a feel for ambiguity. 320 00:22:59,002 --> 00:23:01,129 Anyone else want to volunteer? 321 00:23:05,133 --> 00:23:07,260 -Me? -Give me your paper. 322 00:23:09,012 --> 00:23:10,388 Here you go. 323 00:23:12,557 --> 00:23:15,018 -No pepperoni today? -It's clean. 324 00:23:16,228 --> 00:23:20,148 "l am a freshman at a small Northeastern college. 325 00:23:20,357 --> 00:23:22,692 "l never thought these letters were real... 326 00:23:22,776 --> 00:23:25,862 "until a few days ago, when I had an experience that changed my mind. 327 00:23:25,946 --> 00:23:27,697 "l just had to share it with you." 328 00:23:27,781 --> 00:23:30,617 -Miss Taub, I don't think that you-- -Take it easy. 329 00:23:32,369 --> 00:23:35,539 "l am 6'2", with dark hair... 330 00:23:35,580 --> 00:23:39,459 "athletic build from football, and I'm considered good-looking by my friends. 331 00:23:39,543 --> 00:23:41,628 "I'm not boastful, but I must explain... 332 00:23:41,711 --> 00:23:44,756 "for the sake of clarity, that I am relatively well equipped... 333 00:23:44,839 --> 00:23:48,176 "with 10 inches of solid man-meat. 334 00:23:53,890 --> 00:23:58,228 "Still, it has been a dry season as far as girls were concerned." 335 00:24:11,783 --> 00:24:12,951 I'll get it. 336 00:24:16,371 --> 00:24:19,499 -It's for you, Gib. Long distance. -Thanks. 337 00:24:21,126 --> 00:24:22,210 I'm coming. 338 00:24:26,298 --> 00:24:28,091 Buddy, you getting any? 339 00:24:28,550 --> 00:24:32,512 I'm talking to you cordless. What are you doing for Christmas break? 340 00:24:32,762 --> 00:24:35,140 I do. You're coming to California. 341 00:24:35,891 --> 00:24:37,100 What don't you know? 342 00:24:37,183 --> 00:24:39,853 My roommate's got a convertible. We cruise to Palm Springs. 343 00:24:40,604 --> 00:24:42,230 I got exams after Christmas. 344 00:24:42,606 --> 00:24:46,568 We are talking SoCal, here. It's 80 degrees outside. 345 00:24:46,776 --> 00:24:49,029 My roommate's got this beach house in Malibu. 346 00:24:49,279 --> 00:24:50,947 I can't afford the flight. 347 00:24:51,489 --> 00:24:53,909 Listen. Can you hear that? 348 00:24:54,534 --> 00:24:57,120 Hear that? Those are waves calling out to you. 349 00:24:57,162 --> 00:24:58,788 They're beckoning. 350 00:25:00,123 --> 00:25:03,043 -"Come to California." -It's too sunny out there. 351 00:25:03,710 --> 00:25:06,004 There's a certain someone I want you to meet. 352 00:25:06,087 --> 00:25:07,005 Forget it. 353 00:25:07,422 --> 00:25:09,591 She's a very special person. 354 00:25:09,674 --> 00:25:11,676 I can't deal with striking out on both coasts. 355 00:25:11,968 --> 00:25:13,803 You're not gonna strike out. 356 00:25:13,887 --> 00:25:17,307 She was released from parochial school. She's in her experimental phase. 357 00:25:17,849 --> 00:25:19,017 Will you forget it? 358 00:25:19,351 --> 00:25:22,103 -She loves sex. -What does she look like? 359 00:25:23,063 --> 00:25:25,273 You remember that last snapshot I sent you? 360 00:25:25,315 --> 00:25:27,817 The blonde in the string bikini? Get it. 361 00:25:29,027 --> 00:25:31,988 -I can't right now. -That's an order, Private Gibson. 362 00:25:37,285 --> 00:25:38,578 Excuse me. 363 00:25:44,668 --> 00:25:45,919 That's new. 364 00:25:50,257 --> 00:25:51,633 -Yeah. -You got it? 365 00:25:51,883 --> 00:25:53,927 -Yeah. -Good. Now look at it. 366 00:25:54,094 --> 00:25:55,220 Fixate on it. 367 00:25:55,303 --> 00:25:57,806 -Are you fixating on it? -I'm fixating. 368 00:25:58,098 --> 00:26:00,100 -Are you sitting down? -Yes. 369 00:26:00,225 --> 00:26:01,893 She's a sure thing. 370 00:26:02,269 --> 00:26:03,645 A sure thing. 371 00:26:05,021 --> 00:26:08,358 I don't need to explain the deep significance of those words. 372 00:26:08,441 --> 00:26:11,027 I told her all about you, and she's dying to meet you. 373 00:26:11,111 --> 00:26:13,989 But you gotta drag your ass out here by the 22nd... 374 00:26:13,989 --> 00:26:16,700 because she's leaving the next day for a semester at sea. 375 00:26:16,783 --> 00:26:18,702 So, think you can make it? 376 00:26:22,747 --> 00:26:24,207 -Are you Gib? -Yeah. 377 00:26:24,291 --> 00:26:25,917 Hi, welcome aboard. 378 00:26:26,001 --> 00:26:28,670 -I'm Mary Ann Webster. -And I'm Gary Cooper. 379 00:26:28,920 --> 00:26:31,339 But not the Gary Cooper that's dead. 380 00:26:32,007 --> 00:26:33,133 Hop in. 381 00:26:39,681 --> 00:26:42,601 -Alison, this is Gib. -And Gib, this is Alison. 382 00:26:43,268 --> 00:26:45,103 I knew I should've taken the bus. 383 00:26:45,186 --> 00:26:48,190 What, and wind up sitting next to some sleazebag? 384 00:26:48,356 --> 00:26:50,108 Some sleazebag you don't know? 385 00:26:50,108 --> 00:26:52,986 -You two know each other. -We're old friends. 386 00:26:53,195 --> 00:26:55,947 We're not old friends. We're acquaintances. 387 00:26:56,198 --> 00:26:57,824 Very distant acquaintances. 388 00:26:57,908 --> 00:27:01,036 Kids, come on. Let's make this a fun trip, okay? 389 00:27:01,119 --> 00:27:03,955 -You guys know any show tunes? -That's a great idea. 390 00:27:04,039 --> 00:27:07,667 When the moon is in the Seventh House 391 00:27:07,709 --> 00:27:11,171 And Jupiter aligns with Mars 392 00:27:11,254 --> 00:27:14,925 Then peace will guide the planets 393 00:27:15,008 --> 00:27:17,802 And love will steer the stars 394 00:27:17,886 --> 00:27:22,098 This is the dawning of the age of Aquarius 395 00:27:22,349 --> 00:27:25,936 The age of Aquarius! 396 00:27:27,812 --> 00:27:32,025 Button up your overcoat when the wind is free 397 00:27:32,108 --> 00:27:35,487 Take good care of yourself you belong to me! 398 00:27:35,695 --> 00:27:36,905 Come on, everybody. 399 00:27:36,988 --> 00:27:41,451 Eat an apple every day, get to bed by 3:00 400 00:27:41,618 --> 00:27:44,663 Take good care of yourself you belong to me! 401 00:27:44,704 --> 00:27:45,789 Do the "ooh-ooh's." 402 00:27:45,872 --> 00:27:47,666 Be careful crossing streets 403 00:27:48,917 --> 00:27:50,460 Don't eat meats 404 00:27:51,795 --> 00:27:53,255 Cut out sweets 405 00:27:54,089 --> 00:27:56,883 You'll get a pain and ruin your tum-tum 406 00:28:02,430 --> 00:28:06,101 I never met anyone like you before. Usually, when I meet someone new... 407 00:28:06,560 --> 00:28:08,645 I feel awkward and shy. 408 00:28:08,979 --> 00:28:10,856 But with you it's different. 409 00:28:10,939 --> 00:28:12,941 I feel I can talk to you. 410 00:28:13,942 --> 00:28:18,321 You know what I'm thinking, without me having to explain it to you in fancy terms. 411 00:28:18,613 --> 00:28:21,616 We speak each other's unspoken language fluently. 412 00:28:23,577 --> 00:28:26,246 Before you go any further, let's be honest. 413 00:28:27,372 --> 00:28:29,749 You want it. I want it. 414 00:28:30,500 --> 00:28:34,087 You know I want it. You don't have to bullshit me to get it. 415 00:28:34,921 --> 00:28:38,383 And even if you do bullshit me, you still get it. 416 00:28:40,135 --> 00:28:44,014 Wear your flannel underwear when you climb a tree 417 00:28:44,097 --> 00:28:47,434 Take good care of yourself, you belong to me 418 00:28:48,351 --> 00:28:51,187 Honey, what's the matter? You're not singing. 419 00:28:51,396 --> 00:28:53,773 I'm not gonna sing if they're not gonna join in. 420 00:28:53,815 --> 00:28:56,860 -Come on, honey-- -No, they're ruining it for everyone. 421 00:29:22,510 --> 00:29:24,721 What do you think you're doing? 422 00:29:24,888 --> 00:29:27,682 -I'm going to bed. -Not with me, you're not. 423 00:29:28,183 --> 00:29:29,726 I'm not going to bed with you. 424 00:29:29,809 --> 00:29:33,188 I'm going to bed in a bed that you happen to be in, also. 425 00:29:33,605 --> 00:29:35,732 I won't try anything, I swear. 426 00:29:36,233 --> 00:29:37,442 Trust me. 427 00:29:38,944 --> 00:29:41,530 You are sleeping on the floor. I worked out a schedule. 428 00:29:41,613 --> 00:29:43,657 -It's not my schedule. -It's both of ours. 429 00:29:43,740 --> 00:29:46,743 They never shut up. What does she see in him? 430 00:29:48,203 --> 00:29:49,955 It's a twisted relationship. 431 00:29:51,206 --> 00:29:53,750 -You want to sleep in the bed? -I do. 432 00:29:54,292 --> 00:29:56,336 Fine, I'll sleep on the floor. 433 00:29:56,461 --> 00:29:58,922 You don't have to sleep on the floor. 434 00:29:59,256 --> 00:30:01,925 -Do you intend to sleep in the bed? -I do. 435 00:30:01,967 --> 00:30:04,427 Then I intend to sleep on the floor. 436 00:30:09,349 --> 00:30:10,684 Good night. 437 00:30:55,896 --> 00:30:58,940 -Great breakfast. -Protein, good for you. 438 00:31:01,818 --> 00:31:05,155 Cheese balls, anyone? Gary? They're good. 439 00:31:05,947 --> 00:31:08,116 -Cheese balls? -No, thank you. 440 00:31:22,130 --> 00:31:24,341 You would think that was funny. 441 00:31:26,551 --> 00:31:29,554 As a matter of fact, I think that's hysterical. 442 00:31:30,180 --> 00:31:33,391 I think it's a scream. An absolute laugh riot. 443 00:31:35,143 --> 00:31:38,146 -What the hell's the matter with it? -It's stupid. 444 00:31:38,188 --> 00:31:39,814 Everything's stupid with you. 445 00:31:39,898 --> 00:31:43,151 All right. It is stupid. What's wrong with being stupid once in a while? 446 00:31:43,235 --> 00:31:45,987 Does everything you do always have to be sensible? 447 00:31:46,071 --> 00:31:47,739 Gary, they're at it again. 448 00:31:47,822 --> 00:31:50,867 Haven't you ever thrown water balloons off the roof? 449 00:31:50,951 --> 00:31:53,495 Didn't you ever sprinkle lvory Flakes on the floor... 450 00:31:53,578 --> 00:31:55,497 because you wanted it to snow in July? 451 00:31:55,580 --> 00:31:59,876 Didn't you ever get really shitfaced, and make a complete fool out of yourself... 452 00:31:59,960 --> 00:32:02,587 and still have an excellent time? 453 00:32:02,796 --> 00:32:04,172 Gary, do something. 454 00:32:04,256 --> 00:32:07,425 Don't you feel great when you do something totally spontaneous? 455 00:32:07,467 --> 00:32:09,177 Something totally off the wall? 456 00:32:09,261 --> 00:32:11,846 Spontaneity has its time and its place. 457 00:32:13,181 --> 00:32:15,517 Alison, do you know what you are? 458 00:32:16,643 --> 00:32:19,062 -You're repressed. -I'm not repressed. 459 00:32:19,145 --> 00:32:20,814 You are. 460 00:32:20,856 --> 00:32:23,066 -I can be as spontaneous as anyone. -Prove it. 461 00:32:23,108 --> 00:32:24,234 What do you want me to do? 462 00:32:24,317 --> 00:32:27,487 -I don't have to prove anything to you. -You can't. You're repressed. 463 00:32:27,571 --> 00:32:29,489 You don't have to be stupid to be spontaneous. 464 00:32:29,573 --> 00:32:31,074 -Repressed. -ls that spontaneous? 465 00:32:31,157 --> 00:32:33,285 -Sticking your butt out of a car? -Repressed! 466 00:32:33,368 --> 00:32:34,828 Face it, you're repressed. 467 00:32:34,911 --> 00:32:36,162 You want spontaneity? 468 00:32:36,204 --> 00:32:38,290 -I'll give you spontaneity! -Repressed! 469 00:32:38,415 --> 00:32:40,333 I'll give you.... Watch this! 470 00:32:41,001 --> 00:32:42,419 You guys! 471 00:32:42,460 --> 00:32:44,170 What in Sam Hill? 472 00:32:44,254 --> 00:32:46,089 Twist and shout! 473 00:32:46,631 --> 00:32:49,009 Come to mama, boys! 474 00:32:49,092 --> 00:32:50,302 Oh, dang! 475 00:32:52,804 --> 00:32:54,472 I'm getting a hive. 476 00:32:57,225 --> 00:33:00,645 "lndecent exposure." "Driving so as to endanger." 477 00:33:01,104 --> 00:33:03,940 "Driving with a load not properly tied down." 478 00:33:09,905 --> 00:33:12,657 -Here. -Thank you, Officer. I'm very sorry. 479 00:33:31,885 --> 00:33:34,471 What the hell are you doing? 480 00:33:36,514 --> 00:33:38,808 -Lock the doors. -Let's be reasonable, Gary! 481 00:33:38,892 --> 00:33:41,353 You can't do this! You can't leave us here! 482 00:33:42,062 --> 00:33:44,147 You can't. Gary, please! 483 00:33:44,231 --> 00:33:47,359 -I'm pleading. -Lock the doors! 484 00:33:48,693 --> 00:33:51,446 I'll do anything! 485 00:33:51,530 --> 00:33:53,198 I'll sing show tunes! 486 00:33:53,532 --> 00:33:56,201 Feelings, nothing more than feelings 487 00:33:56,368 --> 00:33:58,370 Trying to forget my feelings 488 00:34:00,205 --> 00:34:03,166 Feelings of love! 489 00:34:19,057 --> 00:34:20,559 They'll be back. 490 00:34:25,647 --> 00:34:27,274 Just a little mad. 491 00:34:31,695 --> 00:34:34,865 There's a town up ahead. I saw a sign. We can hitch. 492 00:34:35,907 --> 00:34:37,492 Where you going? 493 00:34:41,288 --> 00:34:44,708 We're in the middle of nowhere, cold, there's no cars! You stay and hitch. 494 00:34:44,749 --> 00:34:48,378 -You gonna walk? It's almost 20 miles. -And don't follow me! 495 00:35:42,140 --> 00:35:44,017 Fried pork rinds, anyone? 496 00:35:59,366 --> 00:36:01,743 This doesn't change anything, okay? 497 00:36:02,577 --> 00:36:03,995 Suit yourself. 498 00:36:54,337 --> 00:36:58,008 You know, junk food really doesn't deserve the bad rap it gets. 499 00:36:58,091 --> 00:37:00,093 Take these fried pork rinds. 500 00:37:00,176 --> 00:37:03,346 This particular brand has one percent of the RDA... 501 00:37:03,388 --> 00:37:06,308 that's "recommended daily allowance," of riboflavin. 502 00:37:07,392 --> 00:37:09,603 You ever noticed there's three kinds of junk food? 503 00:37:09,686 --> 00:37:11,938 There's your starchy, fried, greasy type-- 504 00:37:12,063 --> 00:37:15,108 Listen, I appreciate the food. But I'm not in the mood... 505 00:37:15,150 --> 00:37:18,111 to listen to any more of your scientific observations. 506 00:37:18,820 --> 00:37:21,031 You didn't have to come over here and sit down. 507 00:37:21,239 --> 00:37:23,033 You're right. I didn't. 508 00:37:38,590 --> 00:37:39,925 Want a ride? 509 00:37:41,051 --> 00:37:43,678 I wouldn't take that ride, if I were you. 510 00:37:44,262 --> 00:37:45,722 You're not me. 511 00:37:50,185 --> 00:37:51,144 Hello! 512 00:37:52,187 --> 00:37:54,189 -How far are you going? -Los Angeles. 513 00:37:54,272 --> 00:37:57,943 Los Angeles is a long way for a little girl like you to be going. 514 00:37:58,401 --> 00:38:02,531 This thing's like an old woman. You've got to kick her to get her in gear. 515 00:38:09,788 --> 00:38:12,832 I got up at 6:00 this morning, and I've been driving ever since. 516 00:38:12,916 --> 00:38:15,752 You're the first person I've talked to all day. 517 00:38:15,835 --> 00:38:17,295 Wish I could say that. 518 00:38:17,379 --> 00:38:21,508 I hope he gets a ride, but some people just don't know when to put a lid on it. 519 00:38:21,550 --> 00:38:25,637 A day like this, you get to thinking you're the only person on Earth. 520 00:38:25,720 --> 00:38:27,764 It gets lonely on the road. 521 00:38:29,432 --> 00:38:32,310 I know. I can't wait to get to California to see my boyfriend. 522 00:38:32,394 --> 00:38:35,814 I got my CB. But that's not real talk. 523 00:38:36,398 --> 00:38:39,067 -It's not a real person, just a voice. -Let's see if l-- 524 00:38:39,109 --> 00:38:42,237 You never get to know what they look like, or who they are. 525 00:38:42,320 --> 00:38:45,615 ...by Thursday night, or Friday morning at the latest. 526 00:38:46,283 --> 00:38:47,701 You look nice. 527 00:38:51,872 --> 00:38:53,748 Why are we stopping here? 528 00:38:55,292 --> 00:38:56,877 What are we doing? 529 00:38:57,627 --> 00:38:59,671 It gets lonely on the road. 530 00:39:01,131 --> 00:39:03,842 -Don't touch me! -Don't be scared. 531 00:39:04,676 --> 00:39:07,470 -I wouldn't hurt you. -Don't! 532 00:39:11,224 --> 00:39:13,435 Thanks for the ride. I've been out here all day. 533 00:39:13,518 --> 00:39:15,228 Am I interrupting anything? 534 00:39:15,270 --> 00:39:17,647 Me and the wife are just having a little squabble. 535 00:39:17,731 --> 00:39:19,774 It's not easy getting rides, you know? 536 00:39:19,858 --> 00:39:22,194 Most people are afraid to pick up hitchhikers. 537 00:39:22,277 --> 00:39:24,279 You never know who you might pick up. 538 00:39:24,362 --> 00:39:27,407 I mean, I could be some crazed slimeball. 539 00:39:27,574 --> 00:39:31,077 I mean, a real deranged, violent psycho. You know what I mean? 540 00:39:31,161 --> 00:39:33,455 I mean, a guy who would rip your heart out... 541 00:39:33,538 --> 00:39:36,041 and eat it, just for pleasure! 542 00:39:36,583 --> 00:39:38,877 I'm talking about a total maniac! 543 00:39:39,586 --> 00:39:42,047 Do you know what I mean? 544 00:39:46,593 --> 00:39:48,345 Why aren't we moving? 545 00:39:49,012 --> 00:39:51,223 Don't you want to give me a ride? 546 00:39:52,599 --> 00:39:56,645 -I'm only going about another mile. -Then what the hell did you pick me up for? 547 00:39:56,728 --> 00:39:59,189 You think I got nothing better to do with my life... 548 00:39:59,272 --> 00:40:02,192 than to sit here and to pass the time with you? 549 00:40:03,068 --> 00:40:04,694 Shitbrain! 550 00:40:08,949 --> 00:40:11,535 I don't think I want this ride after all. 551 00:40:12,702 --> 00:40:15,747 And I think I'll take your wife, if you don't mind. 552 00:40:22,128 --> 00:40:23,505 -Shit. -The luggage! 553 00:40:28,051 --> 00:40:29,928 Gib, are you okay? 554 00:40:34,933 --> 00:40:37,727 Told you you shouldn't have taken that ride. 555 00:40:37,811 --> 00:40:41,231 -That's because you know everything, right? -That's right. 556 00:40:43,108 --> 00:40:46,403 Then you should also know that you make it virtually impossible... 557 00:40:46,486 --> 00:40:50,323 for anyone to be grateful for anything nice you might have done. 558 00:40:56,830 --> 00:40:58,290 I'm sorry, okay? 559 00:40:58,623 --> 00:41:00,166 -Yeah. -You okay? 560 00:41:08,967 --> 00:41:11,595 Why did you get on the back of that truck? 561 00:41:12,679 --> 00:41:16,099 Because I'm the kind of guy that likes to live on the edge. 562 00:41:29,196 --> 00:41:31,907 I just want to get on that bus, and tilt the seat back... 563 00:41:31,948 --> 00:41:34,576 and fall asleep, and wake up in California. 564 00:41:34,618 --> 00:41:37,829 Check out those guys. Wonder what they majored in. 565 00:41:38,455 --> 00:41:40,290 -Where to? -Los Angeles. 566 00:41:40,832 --> 00:41:42,834 That'll be $89.50. 567 00:41:43,418 --> 00:41:46,880 -Bus number 33, now boarding outside. -Thank you. 568 00:41:47,088 --> 00:41:50,258 -Where to? -Nowhere. Just browsing. 569 00:41:52,510 --> 00:41:55,639 Tell me, those guys over there? Do they sleep here all night? 570 00:41:55,722 --> 00:41:58,016 Come on, I want to get a good seat. 571 00:41:58,099 --> 00:41:59,267 Where to? 572 00:42:06,274 --> 00:42:08,026 Where's your ticket? 573 00:42:08,360 --> 00:42:10,487 I've been thinking it over. I'm gonna hitch. 574 00:42:10,570 --> 00:42:13,073 The way I see it, I'm not getting any younger. 575 00:42:13,156 --> 00:42:16,910 This could be my last chance to see the real America, really relate to the people. 576 00:42:16,993 --> 00:42:18,578 Loan me $1. 577 00:42:21,206 --> 00:42:22,999 Change a $5? 578 00:42:23,083 --> 00:42:25,043 -How much money do you have? -That's $1. 579 00:42:25,126 --> 00:42:26,336 -I got money. -That's $2. 580 00:42:26,419 --> 00:42:28,004 -How much? -Enough. 581 00:42:29,339 --> 00:42:31,841 -Can you loan me $1.23? -Sure. 582 00:42:37,264 --> 00:42:39,182 How much do you got there? 583 00:42:39,391 --> 00:42:40,976 $18.77. 584 00:42:42,644 --> 00:42:45,981 How did you expect to get to California on $18.77? 585 00:42:46,648 --> 00:42:48,066 I'll get by. 586 00:42:50,110 --> 00:42:52,571 I have $20. You can have $50. 587 00:42:53,196 --> 00:42:55,866 -I can't take that. -You can. Come on. 588 00:42:56,157 --> 00:42:58,994 You can pay me back after Christmas. Take it. 589 00:43:02,706 --> 00:43:06,042 -I won't forget this. -You will. But I'll remind you. 590 00:43:06,793 --> 00:43:09,921 Last call for bus number 33, leaving for St. Louis... 591 00:43:10,005 --> 00:43:13,842 Tulsa, Oklahoma City, Albuquerque, Tucson and Los Angeles. 592 00:43:14,301 --> 00:43:16,011 There's your bus. You better hurry. 593 00:43:23,268 --> 00:43:24,978 Are you sure you'll be okay? 594 00:43:25,020 --> 00:43:27,772 Don't you worry about me. You go have a good trip. 595 00:43:33,528 --> 00:43:35,322 -See you. -'Bye. 596 00:44:22,827 --> 00:44:25,288 Back. Give Hercules some room. 597 00:44:28,542 --> 00:44:31,545 Hercules stands no chance against the sea monster. 598 00:44:32,837 --> 00:44:34,422 Anything good on? 599 00:44:35,590 --> 00:44:37,759 -Your bus just left. -I know. 600 00:44:39,177 --> 00:44:40,804 Why weren't you on it? 601 00:44:40,845 --> 00:44:43,807 I'm the kind of gal who likes to live on the edge. 602 00:44:45,976 --> 00:44:47,853 We're gonna have to use a towel, here. 603 00:44:47,894 --> 00:44:50,939 This could get very messy, if you don't know what you're doing. 604 00:44:51,022 --> 00:44:53,233 This is called shotgunning beer. 605 00:44:53,316 --> 00:44:57,529 It's an ancient tribal custom. Originated in Southeast Asia, I believe. 606 00:44:57,612 --> 00:45:01,199 Take the beer. Poke a hole in it, as I will do now... 607 00:45:04,244 --> 00:45:07,998 using any household appliance. I'm using a pen. 608 00:45:09,624 --> 00:45:12,627 Make it just big enough to fit your mouth over it. 609 00:45:13,545 --> 00:45:17,007 Eighty-six the pen, and then in one swift.... 610 00:45:17,299 --> 00:45:19,175 Now listen to me, it's very important. 611 00:45:19,259 --> 00:45:21,970 In one swift, deft motion, you're gonna take it... 612 00:45:22,053 --> 00:45:25,098 pull it up, and then release the cork. Not the cork, this thing... 613 00:45:25,182 --> 00:45:28,143 and all the beer will slide down to your throat in two seconds. 614 00:45:28,226 --> 00:45:30,520 -Now wait. Are you sure you're ready? -I'm ready. 615 00:45:30,604 --> 00:45:33,148 For all you kids watching, this is very dangerous. 616 00:45:33,190 --> 00:45:35,775 Let's not try this at home, all right? 617 00:45:36,651 --> 00:45:39,029 -Sure you're ready? -I can't believe I'm doing this. 618 00:45:39,112 --> 00:45:41,281 -It's good for you. -Mom, forgive me. 619 00:45:43,116 --> 00:45:44,701 Swallow, swallow! 620 00:45:45,452 --> 00:45:47,078 "Danger, Will Robinson!" 621 00:45:49,998 --> 00:45:52,500 -Definite shotgun potential. -But it went up my nose. 622 00:45:52,584 --> 00:45:54,878 For a beginner, it's amazing what you just did. 623 00:45:55,629 --> 00:45:56,963 Really nice. 624 00:45:57,881 --> 00:45:59,007 Really? 625 00:46:05,055 --> 00:46:07,766 I just remembered, I got to check something. 626 00:46:31,706 --> 00:46:34,292 Listen, tonight I'll sleep on the floor. 627 00:46:34,376 --> 00:46:37,045 -I don't think so. -I don't want any arguments from you. 628 00:46:37,128 --> 00:46:40,173 I mean, it's only fair. Last night, I slept on the bed-- 629 00:46:40,215 --> 00:46:44,469 Jason, I don't think so. It's gonna take me a bit longer than I anticipated. 630 00:46:44,511 --> 00:46:47,514 Today's the 19th. Better not expect me... 631 00:46:47,597 --> 00:46:50,141 till the 22nd or 23rd, at the earliest. 632 00:46:51,268 --> 00:46:53,395 Everything's fine. Really. 633 00:46:54,229 --> 00:46:55,647 I'll call you tomorrow. 634 00:46:56,439 --> 00:46:57,607 Promise. 635 00:46:58,108 --> 00:46:59,985 I miss you, Jason. 636 00:47:01,027 --> 00:47:04,447 I've got this great big bed, and no one to share it with. 637 00:47:10,537 --> 00:47:13,039 -What are you doing? -I'm going for a walk. 638 00:47:13,123 --> 00:47:16,084 -It's almost midnight. -It's too stuffy in here. 639 00:47:21,298 --> 00:47:22,299 I'm here. 640 00:47:45,906 --> 00:47:47,199 Are you 21? 641 00:47:53,246 --> 00:47:55,415 Okay, Dr. Levinson, what'll it be? 642 00:47:55,498 --> 00:47:57,792 Double bourbon and a beer chaser. 643 00:48:24,361 --> 00:48:26,613 Come on, Giblet, one more time. 644 00:48:28,573 --> 00:48:30,700 I can't. Tomorrow, I promise. 645 00:48:31,535 --> 00:48:32,953 It was so good. 646 00:48:33,161 --> 00:48:35,789 It was so masterful. Relentless... 647 00:48:36,623 --> 00:48:38,542 but with a delicate touch. 648 00:48:38,959 --> 00:48:40,669 Confident. Creative. 649 00:48:41,461 --> 00:48:43,046 I was overwhelmed. 650 00:48:43,505 --> 00:48:45,173 You're a true artist. 651 00:48:45,257 --> 00:48:48,093 Just let me sleep awhile, regain my strength. 652 00:48:48,260 --> 00:48:51,012 Five minutes. A grace period, if you will. 653 00:48:51,221 --> 00:48:52,389 Please. 654 00:48:53,557 --> 00:48:55,016 What the heck. 655 00:48:56,268 --> 00:48:57,394 Howdy. 656 00:48:58,687 --> 00:49:01,439 -Mind if I sit here? -Sure, buddy, go ahead. 657 00:49:01,982 --> 00:49:03,525 Thank you kindly. 658 00:49:04,651 --> 00:49:07,237 -Two beers. -And another double bourbon. 659 00:49:09,865 --> 00:49:13,743 I got one of them sweepstakes flyers in the mail today... 660 00:49:14,286 --> 00:49:18,748 and I can't figure if it's worth the effort to send it in. 661 00:49:19,708 --> 00:49:21,668 You think I should bother? 662 00:49:24,588 --> 00:49:26,256 Probably not. 663 00:49:28,425 --> 00:49:30,385 She says she's from Paris. 664 00:49:30,844 --> 00:49:32,304 I don't believe that. 665 00:49:33,180 --> 00:49:34,639 Paris women... 666 00:49:35,891 --> 00:49:38,727 don't give you a hard time, like they do here. 667 00:49:38,768 --> 00:49:42,189 To a Paris woman, sex is an art. 668 00:49:42,731 --> 00:49:45,108 I was in Paris once, with my wife. 669 00:49:47,485 --> 00:49:49,404 Boy, am I glad she's dead. 670 00:49:50,405 --> 00:49:52,073 One tequila eggnog. 671 00:49:52,908 --> 00:49:55,535 I had fried food again for lunch today. 672 00:49:56,703 --> 00:49:58,872 I know I shouldn't have had it... 673 00:49:59,748 --> 00:50:01,750 but I couldn't help myself. 674 00:50:03,126 --> 00:50:05,462 You think I lack self-discipline? 675 00:50:06,588 --> 00:50:09,466 What's wrong with me? I'm a good-looking guy. 676 00:50:09,507 --> 00:50:12,636 You are a good-looking guy. 677 00:50:13,428 --> 00:50:14,888 And I'm a good-looking guy. 678 00:50:14,971 --> 00:50:16,389 -You are. -I am. 679 00:50:16,473 --> 00:50:18,808 We're all three good-looking guys. 680 00:50:19,226 --> 00:50:21,228 That's right. We are. 681 00:50:22,187 --> 00:50:25,482 And it's Christmastime, and I'm gonna buy you a drink. 682 00:50:25,565 --> 00:50:28,151 -What are you drinking? -Something light. 683 00:50:28,693 --> 00:50:31,488 -What, like a nice Chablis? -A spritzer. 684 00:50:32,405 --> 00:50:35,700 Barkeep, give this man a trough of spritzer. 685 00:50:36,159 --> 00:50:38,954 And you, cowboy guy, what do you want to drink? 686 00:50:39,037 --> 00:50:41,748 -I'll have a beer. -Get cowboy guy a beer. 687 00:50:42,082 --> 00:50:44,584 It's on me tonight. Drinks are on me. 688 00:50:44,751 --> 00:50:45,710 They're on me. 689 00:50:51,424 --> 00:50:55,053 Chestnuts roasting on an open fire 690 00:50:56,179 --> 00:50:59,850 Jack Frost nipping at your nose 691 00:51:00,767 --> 00:51:05,272 Yuletide carols being sung by a choir 692 00:51:05,438 --> 00:51:09,234 and folks dressed up like Eskimos 693 00:51:09,484 --> 00:51:11,778 Everybody knows 694 00:51:11,862 --> 00:51:15,031 that turkey and some mistletoe 695 00:51:39,264 --> 00:51:40,891 Where've you been? 696 00:51:50,108 --> 00:51:51,693 This guy, Jason... 697 00:51:52,277 --> 00:51:55,780 may be a real brain and all, but can he do this? 698 00:52:26,102 --> 00:52:30,148 Don't worry, Mom, I'll take the garbage out in the morning, I promise. 699 00:52:36,988 --> 00:52:41,618 Chestnuts roasting on the fire 700 00:52:55,549 --> 00:52:56,758 Come on, let's go. 701 00:52:56,800 --> 00:53:00,095 -Okay, do you have everything? -I have everything. You have everything. 702 00:53:00,178 --> 00:53:02,848 -Sure? -We all have everything. Everything's fine. 703 00:53:03,348 --> 00:53:05,392 -Let's go. -You can't rush me. 704 00:53:06,768 --> 00:53:09,813 She's checking under the thing. What is under there, I don't know. 705 00:53:09,896 --> 00:53:12,983 -A bathroom. Again with the bathroom. -You can't rush me! 706 00:53:13,066 --> 00:53:15,527 We've got to travel by day. So let's go. 707 00:53:16,069 --> 00:53:18,905 -Look at the time. We got to go. -We're all proceeding, here. 708 00:53:18,947 --> 00:53:21,199 -Just check everything. -We got everything, here. 709 00:53:21,283 --> 00:53:23,285 We're out of here. 710 00:53:35,130 --> 00:53:36,339 God, I'm starving. 711 00:53:36,423 --> 00:53:38,675 -How does it feel? -Needs more bulk. 712 00:53:38,758 --> 00:53:40,719 We can't eat for 200 miles. 713 00:53:40,802 --> 00:53:42,429 What are you telling me, woman? 714 00:53:42,429 --> 00:53:45,599 -I worked out a schedule. -Another schedule. Great. 715 00:53:46,433 --> 00:53:48,518 I computed exactly how much money we have... 716 00:53:48,602 --> 00:53:51,855 how long it'll take us to get there, how many meals we have to have. 717 00:53:51,938 --> 00:53:54,399 It came out to one meal every 200 miles. 718 00:53:54,482 --> 00:53:56,443 After 700, though, we can have a snack. 719 00:53:56,526 --> 00:53:59,487 Good. Cheetos in Albuquerque. I can hardly wait. 720 00:54:01,740 --> 00:54:04,659 -What do you think, nine months? -More like 15. 721 00:54:07,871 --> 00:54:09,831 Excellent. Very pregnant. 722 00:54:13,752 --> 00:54:16,129 -What are you gonna name it? -What? 723 00:54:16,838 --> 00:54:18,131 The baby. 724 00:54:18,632 --> 00:54:19,883 The baby. 725 00:54:21,134 --> 00:54:23,678 If it's a girl, Cynthia. 726 00:54:24,471 --> 00:54:25,931 And if it's a boy... 727 00:54:27,349 --> 00:54:28,475 Elliot. 728 00:54:29,100 --> 00:54:30,852 Those are lovely names. 729 00:54:30,894 --> 00:54:34,189 Elliot? You're gonna name the kid Elliot? 730 00:54:34,523 --> 00:54:36,942 You can't name the kid Elliot. 731 00:54:37,025 --> 00:54:39,861 Elliot is a fat kid with glasses who eats paste. 732 00:54:39,903 --> 00:54:43,406 Not gonna name the kid Elliot. Got to give him a real name. 733 00:54:43,740 --> 00:54:45,283 Give him a name. 734 00:54:45,951 --> 00:54:47,536 -Like Nick. -Nick? 735 00:54:47,577 --> 00:54:51,206 Nick's a real name. Nick's your buddy. 736 00:54:51,665 --> 00:54:54,918 Nick's the kind of guy you can trust, someone you can drink beer with. 737 00:54:55,001 --> 00:54:58,171 Kind of guy who doesn't mind if you puke in his car. 738 00:54:58,255 --> 00:55:00,048 -God. -Vomit, I'm sorry. 739 00:55:06,263 --> 00:55:08,640 -Thank you. -Merry Christmas to you. 740 00:55:13,270 --> 00:55:17,440 I'm gonna have a huge orange juice, three eggs, two sides of bacon... 741 00:55:17,566 --> 00:55:20,527 home fries, four pieces of toast, and then lunch! 742 00:55:20,610 --> 00:55:23,363 You sure we can eat? I don't know if we've gone 200 miles. 743 00:55:23,405 --> 00:55:25,532 I don't want to throw your schedule off. 744 00:55:25,615 --> 00:55:28,076 Leave me alone. I'm a pregnant woman. 745 00:55:34,583 --> 00:55:36,293 How could you lose your money? 746 00:55:36,334 --> 00:55:39,546 -I put it in my schedule book. -How could you lose your schedule book? 747 00:55:39,588 --> 00:55:42,549 That's the most important thing in your life, that stupid book! 748 00:55:42,632 --> 00:55:46,011 You wouldn't even remember your name without it. This is just excellent! 749 00:56:11,828 --> 00:56:13,246 I'm starving. 750 00:56:25,300 --> 00:56:26,551 Thank you. 751 00:56:30,722 --> 00:56:32,516 I'm freezing to death. 752 00:56:36,937 --> 00:56:38,730 My feet are killing me. 753 00:56:45,028 --> 00:56:46,905 I just swallowed my gum. 754 00:56:46,988 --> 00:56:50,116 Your incessant complaining isn't doing us any good. 755 00:56:50,408 --> 00:56:53,119 Can't you try and look on the bright side? 756 00:57:03,672 --> 00:57:05,006 Over there! 757 00:57:27,696 --> 00:57:30,282 Over there. There's a trailer, come on. 758 00:57:35,871 --> 00:57:39,249 It's locked! This is very good. 759 00:57:39,332 --> 00:57:42,669 It's important that this place should have an airtight security system... 760 00:57:42,752 --> 00:57:44,713 in the middle of nowhere! 761 00:57:44,963 --> 00:57:47,173 Wait, I might have a nail file. 762 00:57:51,678 --> 00:57:53,430 I have a credit card. 763 00:57:57,058 --> 00:58:00,270 Credit cards work on a completely different kind of lock. 764 00:58:00,312 --> 00:58:03,481 I don't think you understand. I have a credit card. 765 00:58:03,565 --> 00:58:05,275 You have a credit card? 766 00:58:11,615 --> 00:58:16,161 My dad told me, specifically, I can only use it in case of an emergency. 767 00:58:17,954 --> 00:58:19,748 Maybe one will come up. 768 00:58:21,458 --> 00:58:23,835 Too bad this is the only place that takes credit cards. 769 00:58:23,919 --> 00:58:25,253 Real shame. 770 00:58:25,837 --> 00:58:27,797 Here, try some of my veal. 771 00:58:29,341 --> 00:58:32,219 Only if you try some of this salmon. 772 00:58:32,302 --> 00:58:34,554 I'm not a big fish guy, so you take it. 773 00:58:34,638 --> 00:58:37,015 I'm not gonna eat that, but you try the veal-- 774 00:58:37,098 --> 00:58:38,683 -I'm not gonna-- -Try it. 775 00:58:41,353 --> 00:58:43,438 It's good? See, I told you. 776 00:58:45,190 --> 00:58:46,566 So, you were saying? 777 00:58:46,650 --> 00:58:49,903 Anyway, my father.... He grew up on a farm. 778 00:58:50,695 --> 00:58:54,115 He always thought it was a real shame that we only saw the suburbs. 779 00:58:54,199 --> 00:58:57,369 He used to take us on great camping trips. Want more wine? 780 00:58:59,746 --> 00:59:02,791 One night, I was sleeping in my pup tent with my younger brother. 781 00:59:02,874 --> 00:59:05,293 I must have been, what, six or seven. 782 00:59:05,919 --> 00:59:09,256 I woke up in the middle of the night, and I had to get outside. 783 00:59:10,006 --> 00:59:13,260 I don't know why. I just really wanted to go outside. 784 00:59:14,719 --> 00:59:17,055 It was dark. I mean, totally dark. 785 00:59:17,764 --> 00:59:20,308 Not like in the city, or even in the suburbs. 786 00:59:20,392 --> 00:59:22,269 I'm talking absolute blackness. 787 00:59:22,352 --> 00:59:25,146 You couldn't see two inches in front of your face. 788 00:59:26,648 --> 00:59:29,109 But there's one thing you could see. 789 00:59:29,609 --> 00:59:31,653 Millions of things, really. 790 00:59:32,028 --> 00:59:33,905 You could see the stars. 791 00:59:34,948 --> 00:59:38,660 There were more stars out that night than I've ever seen since. 792 00:59:39,828 --> 00:59:42,038 Believe me, I've looked. 793 00:59:42,080 --> 00:59:45,625 I'm standing there, looking up at the sky, and I'm thinking... 794 00:59:45,750 --> 00:59:48,587 that each one of these dots of light is another world. 795 00:59:48,628 --> 00:59:52,173 I didn't know the difference between the stars and the planets, then. 796 00:59:52,215 --> 00:59:55,844 But it made me feel really small. 797 00:59:59,222 --> 01:00:00,348 Lonely. 798 01:00:01,975 --> 01:00:03,852 Do you know what I mean? 799 01:00:06,188 --> 01:00:10,400 Then I thought, maybe on each one of these other worlds... 800 01:00:11,318 --> 01:00:14,029 there's a kid like me. Only, he's shaped like a sponge... 801 01:00:14,070 --> 01:00:17,199 or a pinball machine, or something. Whatever, but he's up there. 802 01:00:17,365 --> 01:00:21,119 Maybe he's on a camping trip, and he's looking up at the stars. 803 01:00:22,287 --> 01:00:25,624 I decided I want to meet this guy. 804 01:00:30,212 --> 01:00:33,506 -A rose for the lady? -Would the lady care for a rose? 805 01:00:34,132 --> 01:00:37,928 Would the lady care to advance the gentleman the cost of a rose? 806 01:00:37,969 --> 01:00:40,388 Put it on the bill. That'd be great. 807 01:00:43,099 --> 01:00:44,267 For you. 808 01:00:45,685 --> 01:00:48,104 -Thank you. -lt was nothing. 809 01:01:16,091 --> 01:01:18,552 You don't have to sleep on the floor. 810 01:01:19,010 --> 01:01:19,970 What? 811 01:01:21,221 --> 01:01:23,682 You don't have to sleep on the floor. 812 01:01:25,600 --> 01:01:27,060 Are you sure? 813 01:01:33,775 --> 01:01:35,902 I won't try anything, I swear. 814 01:01:36,736 --> 01:01:38,071 I trust you. 815 01:02:00,719 --> 01:02:02,429 Good night. 816 01:02:17,319 --> 01:02:18,945 How's your lawyer? 817 01:02:20,238 --> 01:02:21,531 My lawyer? 818 01:02:21,990 --> 01:02:24,659 What's his name? Jimmy, Jeremy. 819 01:02:25,911 --> 01:02:26,828 Jason. 820 01:02:29,289 --> 01:02:30,999 How is Jason, anyway? 821 01:02:33,335 --> 01:02:34,711 Jason's fine. 822 01:02:38,423 --> 01:02:42,427 -I guess you really miss him. -I haven't seen him since last summer. 823 01:02:46,890 --> 01:02:48,683 What's he like? 824 01:02:51,645 --> 01:02:54,981 Jason is very directed. He's a real achiever. 825 01:02:55,649 --> 01:02:59,694 I know, but what is he like? I mean, what kind of beer does he drink? 826 01:03:00,237 --> 01:03:03,573 Is he funny? Does he make you laugh? 827 01:03:06,826 --> 01:03:11,373 -He is everything a girl looks for in a guy. -He sounds perfect. 828 01:03:13,750 --> 01:03:16,044 We both want the same things out of life. 829 01:03:16,127 --> 01:03:18,880 We're both gonna be lawyers. Damn good ones. 830 01:03:19,256 --> 01:03:22,551 We might even open a practice together, up in Vermont. 831 01:03:23,343 --> 01:03:25,720 -Somewhere in the country. -I get it. 832 01:03:25,762 --> 01:03:28,098 Jason is the real outdoorsy type. 833 01:03:29,307 --> 01:03:31,852 Clear, freshwater streams, fragrant meadows... 834 01:03:31,935 --> 01:03:34,354 biodegradable toilet paper, the works. 835 01:03:35,272 --> 01:03:37,899 It's just that we both like old farmhouses. 836 01:03:38,191 --> 01:03:41,194 We thought it'd be nice to find one and restore it ourselves. 837 01:03:41,695 --> 01:03:44,364 Jason thinks it would make a good investment. 838 01:03:44,447 --> 01:03:48,410 I just want it to be nice and warm and cozy. 839 01:03:49,369 --> 01:03:50,871 Kind of like this. 840 01:03:58,503 --> 01:04:01,715 And we're both crazy about basset hounds. 841 01:04:08,430 --> 01:04:11,099 I guess that sounds kind of tame to you. 842 01:04:14,644 --> 01:04:15,812 It sounds nice. 843 01:04:16,271 --> 01:04:17,606 Good night, Alison. 844 01:04:23,778 --> 01:04:25,030 Good night, Gib. 845 01:06:21,021 --> 01:06:23,648 -I didn't try anything, I swear. -I know. 846 01:06:25,442 --> 01:06:28,403 -You were on my side of the bed. -It's all right. 847 01:06:28,570 --> 01:06:30,947 -Nothing happened. -I know. 848 01:06:38,079 --> 01:06:41,374 I'm just gonna go out on the veranda thing for a while. 849 01:07:30,048 --> 01:07:33,051 -Where you headed? -Los Angeles. 850 01:07:33,635 --> 01:07:35,637 It's your lucky day. Come on, let's go! 851 01:07:39,558 --> 01:07:40,809 I got it. 852 01:07:53,196 --> 01:07:55,115 So what's in California? 853 01:07:56,074 --> 01:07:57,075 A girl. 854 01:07:58,243 --> 01:08:01,204 -What's wrong with her? -She's got a boyfriend. 855 01:08:01,955 --> 01:08:03,164 Too bad. 856 01:08:10,005 --> 01:08:12,090 -What's she like? -Who? 857 01:08:13,466 --> 01:08:16,595 -Your girlfriend. -I don't know. I've never met her. 858 01:08:18,555 --> 01:08:20,182 You never met her. 859 01:08:20,557 --> 01:08:24,186 You're going across the country to see a girl you never met. 860 01:08:26,021 --> 01:08:28,106 My best friend, Lance, set it up. 861 01:08:28,148 --> 01:08:30,066 Supposed to be a sure thing. 862 01:08:30,108 --> 01:08:31,526 A sure thing? 863 01:08:38,533 --> 01:08:42,579 A sure thing, no questions asked, no strings attached-- 864 01:08:42,662 --> 01:08:43,997 No guilt involved. 865 01:08:44,080 --> 01:08:45,582 A sure thing. 866 01:08:49,502 --> 01:08:52,088 My whole life, I never had a sure thing. 867 01:08:53,548 --> 01:08:57,469 Probably never meet her anyway. She's gonna be gone in 24 hours. 868 01:08:57,802 --> 01:09:00,722 You pay for the traffic tickets, I'll get you in the saddle. 869 01:09:42,764 --> 01:09:44,683 -Thank you. -Thanks a lot. 870 01:09:45,934 --> 01:09:49,312 I hope you fully appreciate the magnitude of your impending good fortune. 871 01:09:49,396 --> 01:09:50,522 I do. 872 01:09:53,900 --> 01:09:55,861 Alison, where are you going? 873 01:10:01,950 --> 01:10:03,243 Wait up. 874 01:10:06,204 --> 01:10:07,831 What is it with you? 875 01:10:08,331 --> 01:10:11,251 You haven't said two words to me since Arizona. 876 01:10:11,668 --> 01:10:14,337 -See you around. -That's it? 877 01:10:16,006 --> 01:10:18,508 -"See you around"? -lsn't that what you want? 878 01:10:18,550 --> 01:10:22,095 No questions asked? No strings attached? No guilt involved? 879 01:10:24,472 --> 01:10:26,641 Have fun with your sure thing. 880 01:10:30,937 --> 01:10:33,732 -I bought this for you. -I bought it! 881 01:10:36,109 --> 01:10:38,195 It's the thought that counts. 882 01:10:53,376 --> 01:10:54,711 Here we are. 883 01:10:57,672 --> 01:11:01,635 Here, let me take that from you. It's really great to see you. 884 01:11:08,433 --> 01:11:11,394 I cleared out this drawer for you. 885 01:11:13,813 --> 01:11:16,608 And you can use this half of the closet. 886 01:11:19,069 --> 01:11:21,947 I bought some of those hangers you like so much. 887 01:11:24,115 --> 01:11:26,868 We'll just put your bags up there after you've unpacked... 888 01:11:26,868 --> 01:11:28,828 get them out of the way. 889 01:11:30,288 --> 01:11:32,165 It's so good to see you. 890 01:11:39,965 --> 01:11:41,049 Look. 891 01:11:46,388 --> 01:11:47,889 Flannel sheets. 892 01:11:49,349 --> 01:11:53,311 You know, the longer you use them, the softer they get. 893 01:11:54,396 --> 01:11:56,773 By the time we find our farmhouse... 894 01:11:56,857 --> 01:11:59,818 my goodness, they'll be incredible, won't they? 895 01:12:02,988 --> 01:12:04,406 Are you all right? 896 01:12:04,489 --> 01:12:06,700 Yes. Great. 897 01:12:07,534 --> 01:12:10,245 -I guess I'm just exhausted from the trip. -Tired. 898 01:12:11,246 --> 01:12:12,956 Those sheets are great. 899 01:12:15,834 --> 01:12:17,878 -I know what you need. -What? 900 01:12:18,128 --> 01:12:19,921 A good hot mug of tea. 901 01:12:20,338 --> 01:12:24,009 Restores both body and spirit. Let's see what we have this week. 902 01:12:24,092 --> 01:12:26,386 Let's see, we've got some Darjeeling... 903 01:12:28,054 --> 01:12:29,139 English Breakfast. 904 01:12:29,222 --> 01:12:32,225 That's more of a studying tea, isn't it? 905 01:12:32,350 --> 01:12:35,562 Let's see, Lapsang Souchong, for those rainy mornings. 906 01:12:36,646 --> 01:12:37,939 Earl Grey. 907 01:12:38,356 --> 01:12:40,901 Remember that camping trip to Vermont? 908 01:12:43,695 --> 01:12:45,989 Of course. China Black. 909 01:12:46,698 --> 01:12:49,534 How about a good hot mug of China Black? 910 01:12:50,994 --> 01:12:52,746 Do you have any beer? 911 01:13:15,602 --> 01:13:17,354 Walter Gibson. 912 01:13:19,356 --> 01:13:21,274 Private Gibson, incoming! 913 01:13:25,445 --> 01:13:26,821 How are you doing, buddy? 914 01:13:26,905 --> 01:13:28,949 -How are you? -Good to see you. Looking good. 915 01:13:29,032 --> 01:13:31,618 Looking good. Glad you made it. Welcome to California... 916 01:13:31,701 --> 01:13:35,455 home of the waves and the babes. I want you to meet some people. 917 01:13:35,539 --> 01:13:38,500 Guys, this is Gib, the guy I told you about. I said he'd make it. 918 01:13:38,583 --> 01:13:41,378 -Hey, dude. -Nice to meet you. 919 01:13:41,461 --> 01:13:45,048 3,000 miles just to get laid? I really respect that. 920 01:13:46,424 --> 01:13:48,510 Tonight is the night, Gib, man. 921 01:13:48,593 --> 01:13:50,679 -Merry Christmas. -I love you. 922 01:13:50,887 --> 01:13:52,430 I don't think she believes me. 923 01:13:52,472 --> 01:13:54,266 -Why is that, man? -I don't know. 924 01:13:54,307 --> 01:13:57,727 You are gonna love California. You ever make it with an avocado? 925 01:13:57,769 --> 01:13:58,895 Party! 926 01:14:01,815 --> 01:14:02,858 Gin. 927 01:14:03,191 --> 01:14:05,777 Let's see, that makes 25 for me... 928 01:14:06,528 --> 01:14:07,654 plus... 929 01:14:12,534 --> 01:14:14,536 43... 930 01:14:14,870 --> 01:14:18,081 so, 25 plus 43 is.... 931 01:14:18,957 --> 01:14:20,584 Can I borrow that? 932 01:14:28,133 --> 01:14:29,259 Sorry. 933 01:14:30,802 --> 01:14:32,179 There you go. 934 01:14:32,345 --> 01:14:35,599 ...which makes the score 233 for me... 935 01:14:37,767 --> 01:14:40,228 and 8 for you. 936 01:14:50,655 --> 01:14:51,865 Charming. 937 01:14:53,533 --> 01:14:57,329 It sounds like someone's having a party. Let's go. It'll be fun. 938 01:14:57,662 --> 01:15:01,583 You know how we feel about parties. They're hot, loud and crowded. 939 01:15:01,625 --> 01:15:04,336 The only reason anyone goes to them is to pick someone up. 940 01:15:04,419 --> 01:15:06,630 Now, why would we want to do that? 941 01:15:07,839 --> 01:15:11,176 -Let's go to Disneyland. -Disneyland is for children. 942 01:15:15,222 --> 01:15:18,892 Let's do something pointless, something totally crazy. 943 01:15:19,976 --> 01:15:22,437 -All right. I tell you what. -What? 944 01:15:23,188 --> 01:15:27,025 I'll spot you 50 points. That'll add some excitement to the game. 945 01:15:36,826 --> 01:15:39,412 I really don't want to wear this stuff. I really don't. 946 01:15:39,496 --> 01:15:42,082 -What do you mean? You look fantastic. -Come with me. 947 01:15:42,165 --> 01:15:44,543 What's the first thing you'll do when you meet her? 948 01:15:44,626 --> 01:15:46,837 Shave my head and join a Polynesian monastery. 949 01:15:46,878 --> 01:15:49,422 -What do you mean? -Tito. Isn't that nice? 950 01:15:49,506 --> 01:15:51,299 -What are you doing? -Like that? 951 01:15:51,383 --> 01:15:53,260 -What's going on? -I look like a moron. 952 01:15:53,343 --> 01:15:56,471 What do you mean, you look like a moron? Look at me. 953 01:15:56,972 --> 01:15:59,057 You don't like green? Is that it? 954 01:15:59,140 --> 01:16:01,893 -I'll get you blue, or the red. -I don't want anyone. 955 01:16:01,935 --> 01:16:03,645 -Come on. -Because I don't. 956 01:16:03,687 --> 01:16:07,023 What do you mean, because you don't? What is that? 957 01:16:07,774 --> 01:16:08,900 You know what? 958 01:16:08,984 --> 01:16:12,487 You happen to be developing a very bad attitude, young man. 959 01:16:15,782 --> 01:16:18,368 Don't move, because she's here. 960 01:16:19,786 --> 01:16:21,454 It's her. Look. 961 01:16:23,039 --> 01:16:27,419 Tonight is the first night of the rest of your sex life. 962 01:16:29,296 --> 01:16:32,340 You're gonna kill me. I don't think I can go through with this. 963 01:16:32,424 --> 01:16:35,135 -I knew it. The breasts are too small? -Breasts are fine. 964 01:16:35,218 --> 01:16:36,845 -Hi, how you doing? -How are you? 965 01:16:36,928 --> 01:16:39,431 -This is a drink for you. -ls that him? 966 01:16:40,390 --> 01:16:42,475 -Yeah. -He's cute. 967 01:16:42,559 --> 01:16:46,479 He's kind of going through a little climate adjustment. 968 01:16:46,563 --> 01:16:49,274 And so we're gonna be with you in just a minute. 969 01:16:49,357 --> 01:16:53,737 So why don't you just go over there and look for something, okay? 970 01:16:53,987 --> 01:16:56,698 -All right. -I love you, babe. You look good. 971 01:16:59,034 --> 01:17:01,286 What's the problem? What's wrong with you? 972 01:17:01,328 --> 01:17:05,665 I don't know. I'm almost 19. Maybe I'm getting too old for this. 973 01:17:05,999 --> 01:17:08,168 What do you want? A goddamn relationship? 974 01:17:08,210 --> 01:17:10,128 I don't know what I want. 975 01:17:10,795 --> 01:17:13,423 -Maybe it's a moral issue. -Moral issue? 976 01:17:13,590 --> 01:17:17,052 This is Lance you're talking to. You have no morals. 977 01:17:18,595 --> 01:17:22,516 You're just in a slump, that's all. It happens to the best of us. 978 01:17:23,016 --> 01:17:27,103 It could happen to me someday. I doubt it, but it could. You nervous? 979 01:17:27,646 --> 01:17:28,605 Get out! 980 01:17:28,647 --> 01:17:31,191 You're nervous, because you haven't done it in a while. 981 01:17:31,274 --> 01:17:35,028 It's like riding a bike. You just got to climb on and keep pedaling. 982 01:17:35,111 --> 01:17:37,447 And wear something white at night. 983 01:17:39,032 --> 01:17:41,535 You want a relationship? That's fine. 984 01:17:41,618 --> 01:17:45,622 Just remember that every relationship starts with a one-night stand. 985 01:17:45,997 --> 01:17:48,792 You came 3,000 miles for a reason, didn't you? 986 01:17:48,833 --> 01:17:50,627 Would you look at that reason? 987 01:17:53,421 --> 01:17:55,340 Go for it, you've earned it. 988 01:17:57,592 --> 01:18:00,178 -Lance, you're right. -That's right. 989 01:18:00,262 --> 01:18:02,347 I'm not being unfaithful to anyone. 990 01:18:02,389 --> 01:18:05,141 Hell, I could use a torrid night of cheap, meaningless lust. 991 01:18:05,225 --> 01:18:07,519 That's right, buddy. There you go. 992 01:18:09,646 --> 01:18:11,356 Look at these people. 993 01:18:11,690 --> 01:18:13,942 They probably think they're having a good time. 994 01:18:28,540 --> 01:18:29,875 Let's dance. 995 01:18:30,333 --> 01:18:33,378 -Since when do you like to dance? -Since tonight. 996 01:18:44,347 --> 01:18:46,099 That's a nice shirt. 997 01:18:49,603 --> 01:18:50,979 From Hawaii. 998 01:18:57,944 --> 01:19:00,780 It's been a long time since I've held you like this. 999 01:19:00,822 --> 01:19:01,948 I know. 1000 01:19:04,659 --> 01:19:07,370 Lance said you were very shy around girls. 1001 01:19:09,456 --> 01:19:12,083 Did he mention what a great dancer I am? 1002 01:19:22,761 --> 01:19:24,763 What else did Lance tell you about me? 1003 01:19:24,804 --> 01:19:26,848 He says you're a real gourmet. 1004 01:19:27,057 --> 01:19:29,059 -And you're a virgin. -What? 1005 01:19:29,601 --> 01:19:31,603 He thinks you might be gay. 1006 01:19:34,147 --> 01:19:36,191 I didn't say it. Lance said it. 1007 01:19:39,069 --> 01:19:40,570 Excuse me, won't you? 1008 01:19:40,654 --> 01:19:43,949 I have to go kick the shit out of someone. Just one second. 1009 01:19:46,910 --> 01:19:50,080 -You told her I was a virgin? -I exaggerated a little. 1010 01:19:50,163 --> 01:19:52,415 Girls like virgins. They find them a challenge. 1011 01:19:52,499 --> 01:19:55,544 -You told her I was gay! -It's a bigger challenge. 1012 01:19:58,880 --> 01:20:01,299 Keep your shirt on, buddy, you're doing great. 1013 01:20:01,383 --> 01:20:05,262 Excuse me. I see a sweet young thing whose sarong needs adjusting. 1014 01:20:06,221 --> 01:20:07,722 Get out of my life. 1015 01:20:23,947 --> 01:20:25,907 Excuse me, I'd like to get some punch. 1016 01:20:26,658 --> 01:20:29,077 Please, allow me. 1017 01:20:29,619 --> 01:20:32,330 -Thank you. -You're very welcome. 1018 01:20:37,419 --> 01:20:40,630 She's got lovely skin, and so much of it. 1019 01:20:41,339 --> 01:20:44,009 She happens to be an excellent judge in quality shirt wear. 1020 01:20:44,092 --> 01:20:46,511 She should try wearing one, sometime. 1021 01:20:51,433 --> 01:20:54,060 -Would you like a cup for Justin? -Jason. 1022 01:20:54,102 --> 01:20:57,480 -Whatever. He probably eats paste. -Justin's twice the man you'll ever be. 1023 01:20:57,564 --> 01:20:58,523 Jason. 1024 01:20:58,565 --> 01:21:01,443 -He's loyal, he's trustworthy-- -Housebroken? 1025 01:21:03,737 --> 01:21:05,614 Do you know this person? 1026 01:21:06,489 --> 01:21:07,824 Not really. 1027 01:21:07,866 --> 01:21:10,202 -Would you like a drink? -No, thank you. 1028 01:21:12,787 --> 01:21:14,623 Jason, let's go to bed. 1029 01:21:15,749 --> 01:21:18,210 Careful, she hogs all the blankets. 1030 01:21:18,251 --> 01:21:21,087 -You snore. -Not tonight, I won't. 1031 01:21:21,588 --> 01:21:23,381 I'm sorry to have kept you waiting. 1032 01:21:23,423 --> 01:21:26,551 How would you like to go up to Lance's room for a drink? 1033 01:21:26,593 --> 01:21:27,886 All right. 1034 01:21:28,220 --> 01:21:29,262 Let's go. 1035 01:21:31,515 --> 01:21:32,807 Good night. 1036 01:21:37,604 --> 01:21:40,357 -He doesn't even know that girl! -How do you know that guy? 1037 01:21:40,440 --> 01:21:42,067 It was all set up by his friend. 1038 01:21:42,108 --> 01:21:45,153 He thinks love is something you order on the phone, like a pizza! 1039 01:21:45,237 --> 01:21:48,323 -How do you know he snores? -He thinks he knows all about stars. 1040 01:21:48,406 --> 01:21:50,867 He doesn't know Cassiopeia's the mother of Andromeda. 1041 01:21:50,867 --> 01:21:53,870 -How's he know you hog the blankets? -The crap he eats... 1042 01:21:53,912 --> 01:21:55,830 cheese balls and beer for breakfast! 1043 01:21:55,914 --> 01:21:58,041 How do you know what he eats for breakfast? 1044 01:22:05,715 --> 01:22:07,050 Come on in. 1045 01:22:17,269 --> 01:22:18,687 Want to sit down? 1046 01:22:19,437 --> 01:22:22,023 -Do you want me to? -Why don't you sit down? 1047 01:22:22,107 --> 01:22:23,358 All right. 1048 01:22:27,153 --> 01:22:29,155 -Do you want a drink? -Sure. 1049 01:22:31,700 --> 01:22:32,784 Great. 1050 01:22:45,505 --> 01:22:46,631 Thanks. 1051 01:22:52,888 --> 01:22:54,472 That's strong. 1052 01:23:07,235 --> 01:23:09,613 Lance sure does drink a lot of beer. 1053 01:23:12,449 --> 01:23:14,242 A lot of it's imported. 1054 01:23:19,539 --> 01:23:22,375 -Are you all right? -I'm fine. Why, don't I look fine? 1055 01:23:22,417 --> 01:23:25,170 -I don't know, it just seems like-- -I'm not. 1056 01:23:31,510 --> 01:23:34,054 -ls it that girl at the punch bowl? -No. 1057 01:23:34,137 --> 01:23:37,599 It's nothing. Particularly not that girl at the punch bowl. 1058 01:23:39,643 --> 01:23:41,937 Why didn't you tell me about him? 1059 01:23:43,146 --> 01:23:45,899 Because he's not worth mentioning. He's a creep. 1060 01:24:01,456 --> 01:24:03,750 You made love to him, didn't you? 1061 01:24:06,461 --> 01:24:08,380 -Did you make love to him? -No. 1062 01:24:08,463 --> 01:24:10,882 -Honest? -Honest. 1063 01:24:14,594 --> 01:24:16,137 Do you love him? 1064 01:24:36,324 --> 01:24:38,702 I have to go to the library. I'm really behind. 1065 01:24:38,743 --> 01:24:42,330 That's what I should've done. I didn't study all this week. 1066 01:24:42,956 --> 01:24:44,082 Me, neither. 1067 01:24:55,635 --> 01:24:56,928 Want some? 1068 01:24:59,055 --> 01:25:00,974 Good morning, everybody. 1069 01:25:01,183 --> 01:25:04,144 You're gonna have to talk to me sooner or later. 1070 01:25:04,436 --> 01:25:06,563 -No, thank you. -All right. Here we go. 1071 01:25:06,646 --> 01:25:10,817 I've got a very pleasant surprise today. Comes from an unlikely source. 1072 01:25:11,776 --> 01:25:13,236 Walter Gibson. 1073 01:25:15,614 --> 01:25:17,616 It is called The Sure Thing. 1074 01:25:20,118 --> 01:25:22,662 "'lt could be tonight,' he thought... 1075 01:25:23,121 --> 01:25:25,999 "as he stood in the corner, pretending to have a good time. 1076 01:25:26,082 --> 01:25:28,084 "He would meet her tonight. 1077 01:25:28,376 --> 01:25:32,172 "All his young life, he had dreamed of a girl like this. 1078 01:25:32,797 --> 01:25:35,091 "5'6", silky hair... 1079 01:25:35,509 --> 01:25:37,385 "trim, nubile body...." 1080 01:25:38,512 --> 01:25:40,931 "Nubile," by the way, is spelled with a "u." 1081 01:25:41,306 --> 01:25:44,267 "...nubile body that really knew how to move... 1082 01:25:44,559 --> 01:25:47,437 "and soft, deeply tanned skin. 1083 01:25:48,605 --> 01:25:51,775 "Now, as for personality traits, she needed only one. 1084 01:25:52,192 --> 01:25:55,028 "She had to love sex, and all the time. 1085 01:25:55,570 --> 01:25:59,866 "To arrive at this moment, he had traveled vast distances... 1086 01:26:00,158 --> 01:26:02,244 "enduring many hardships: 1087 01:26:02,661 --> 01:26:05,455 "abject poverty, starvation... 1088 01:26:06,081 --> 01:26:08,917 "show tunes, you name it. 1089 01:26:10,544 --> 01:26:13,588 "From across the room he saw her. She was perfect. 1090 01:26:14,840 --> 01:26:18,552 "He knew almost nothing about her, and she didn't know much more about him. 1091 01:26:18,635 --> 01:26:23,056 "lt was exactly how it was supposed to be. He brought her to his room. 1092 01:26:24,391 --> 01:26:27,477 "The lights were soft, the moment was right. 1093 01:26:29,437 --> 01:26:32,607 "Then she leaned over and whispered in his ear: 1094 01:26:33,984 --> 01:26:35,569 "'Do you love me?' 1095 01:26:37,445 --> 01:26:41,616 "Thoughts raced through his mind. Did she really want him? 1096 01:26:42,409 --> 01:26:46,329 "What had he done to deserve this bounty? Does God exist? 1097 01:26:46,705 --> 01:26:49,082 "Who invented liquid soap, and why? 1098 01:26:51,126 --> 01:26:54,588 "'Do you love me?' Staring into her eyes... 1099 01:26:55,547 --> 01:26:58,341 "he knew that she really needed to hear it. 1100 01:27:00,010 --> 01:27:04,389 "But for the first time in his life, he knew these were no longer just words. 1101 01:27:06,057 --> 01:27:09,436 "And if he said it, it would be a lie. 1102 01:27:11,188 --> 01:27:14,316 "'Do you love me?' she whispered. 'Do you love me?' 1103 01:27:15,734 --> 01:27:17,652 "lt would not be tonight. 1104 01:27:18,862 --> 01:27:20,864 "The answer was 'no."' 1105 01:27:21,615 --> 01:27:23,158 He was a traitor! 1106 01:27:35,045 --> 01:27:36,963 You didn't sleep with her? 1107 01:27:37,756 --> 01:27:39,591 Still seeing Jason? 1108 01:27:40,509 --> 01:27:41,927 We broke up. 1109 01:27:42,928 --> 01:27:44,346 That's too bad. 1110 01:27:51,353 --> 01:27:53,146 You didn't sleep with her. 1111 01:27:54,856 --> 01:27:56,483 She wasn't my type. 86397

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