Original subtitles

You're probably wondering why I brought you here today.

- Not really. - Check it!

All the richest people in history have drinks named after them.

Shirley Temple, Arnold Palmer, John F. Lemonade.

What drink's gonna make me rich you ask?

I'll tell you what! One can of RadiCola,

frozen fruit juice concentrate, a dash of hot sauce...

Sugar Roasted Sugar Bombs for texture, and the rest...

Mordecai, witness The RigJuice!

Dude, I don't think you should drink that.

My face feels like magic.

Dude, wanna taste?

I'm not dumb enough to drink that stuff.

Come on, we do dumb stuff all the time!

We're like two peas in a pod.

No we're not.. I'm definitely smarter than you.

It's been that way ever since you dropped out of high school.

Dude what?

I don't need no high school education.

You can't use everything from school in everyday life.

Hey, Mordecai and Rigby. I got a question for you.

So, you know those six turtles at the park petting zoo?

Each one needs a turtle fence.

Assuming each turtle needs nine square feet of space,

I need you guys to figure out the minimum number

of nine foot planks used for construction.

Whoa, Whoa, slow down, Benson.

Rigby can't answer that question.

He doesn't have a high school diploma.

You don't have a diploma?

Thanks for wasting my time. Where's Skips? I'll go ask him.

Ask Skips what?

Oh, just about some math problem that Rigby doesn't know how to solve.

STOP TALKING!!!

Just because I couldn't solve some math problem, doesn't make you more smarter than me!

Check that grammar, bro!

"More Smart", not "More Smarter".

Didn't you learn that in high school?

LEARN THIS!!

A high school diploma never got nobody nothin' and that's a fact!

Free Burgers!

Free Burgers for all high school graduates!

I'm a high school graduate! I got my diploma right here!

NOOO!

No,

wait! I've got my diploma!

Come baack!

You misspelled "Diploma" dude.

That's it! I'm going back to high school!

Eh, doesn't sound like a good idea to me.

Our friendship wouldn't work if we're both smart.

What? What are you talking about?

We're both the same amount of smart as each other!

No, you're not!

I'm the smart one, and you're my friend.

That's our dynamic, dude.

I have a High School diploma, and you don't.

I'm gonna get my diploma, and we'll see how you like being the dumb one!

Well, class, this is quite possibly the hardest math problem in the world,

whoever can solve it

will be leaving the classroom today with a diploma in their hands

Did you say diploma?

That... is correct!

Congratulations, Rigby,

you won't need to go near another school for the rest of your life!

- RIGBY! - Huh? Wha?

Can I get my diploma now?

Get outta my class, Rigby.

- You fell asleep in class, didn't you? - SHUT UP!

You wouldn't fall asleep so much if you had your High School diploma

That lousy High School diploma.

I can get my diploma the easy way, online.

Welcome to the Education Mentor.

Get your diploma now by taking our online test.

I got this.

First question:

Which of the following is not a square?

This is too hard.

I WANT MY DIPLOMA!

Ads go away now!

BrainMax? Increase your intellegence?

More smarter.

Welcome to the BrainMax system.

Instructions:

Take one tablespoon a day.

Do not take if pregnant, or one hour after heavy thinking.

Will see results in thirty to forty days!

What?!

I'll just drink a month's worth of doses, I mean it doesn't say not to.

I Know This Now.

Wait A Minute I Know Everything.

Hey, I know something that can help you with that crossword.

It's called a High School diploma.

Very amusing Mordecai.

缺缺缺Perhaps you can assist me with this.

Tell me, what's an eight letter word for idiot?

What? Why are you talking like that?

I tried imbicule,bonehead, peabrain,

oh wait! I got it. Mordecai.

You're the idiot! You Dumbface!

I'm afraid while dumbface fits, it's simply too stupid to fit in this puzzle.

Face it Mordecai, I'm the smartest now.

What is that? That isn't RigJuice!

- BrainMax? - Get your hands off that!

Gimme that!

First of all, I wanna contradict your earlier statement, Rigby.

This theory proves you're dumber than me.

As you can see by my encounter theory,

it is you, that you are dumber than me.

Tsk. Tsk. Wait till you see my 20 page research paper backing up with my theory.

Tsk. Tsk. I'm gonna write a 21 page paper backing up my theory

AND prove yours wrong!

Tsk. Tsk. Is that so.

Tsk. Tsk. Yeah!

In closing, you're theories had failed to prove that you're smarter.

For your brain is no bigger than a walnut.

Very funny Mordecai,

but your paper is fundlementally flawed

because your brain is made of 99% K9 butt cheeks.

There is still one fuerable truth.

You don't have a High School diploma,

so I'm smarter than you. You imbecile.

I am not an imbecile!

If a diploma will prove that I'm smarter than you, than so be it!

I can't read it!

Probably because you're still too stupid.

Here.

What kind of writing is this?

Mordecai. Rigby. You guys-

Mordecai! Rigby! Get downstairs right now and clean down the mess you made

or I'm gonna fire you-

Dude, what is he saying?

Oh no. We've become so smart, they're stupid to us.

If you haven't made fun of me so much, none of this would've happened!

Whatever. If you cant even get your diploma because we're so smart.

So what's the point.

You're right. There is no point.

What's the point of being so smart, if you can't even understand anyone.

We have to get stupid again.

How?

RigJuice.

The fridge.

The RigJuice!

Pour me some.

It looks... different now.

Ready.

Wait. If I drink this, I'll never get my diploma.

Dude, it's just a piece of paper.

I know that, but you'll never stop making fun of me for it.

I don't care, I won't make fun of you for it I promise...

To being stupid?

To being stupid. Bottoms up.

...Did that work?

And if you stop goofing off and clean up this graffiti now

I'm gonna tear you from limb to limb!

Do you have anything to say for yourselves?

What just happened??

I don't remember anything...

Me and Fives were practicing for our pie contest,

when you dudes came and were speaking Spanish or something.

Then you drink that green stuff.

I can't believe you made me drink your lame drink.

Better get started, or it's getting out of your paycheck.

Yeah, losers!

You know, maybe if you had a High School diploma,

we wouldn't be in this mess.

Well guess what,

this drop out somehow got you to drink RigJuice.

I'll get the paint.

That's good RigJuice.