Original subtitles

Previously, on "Below Deck Mediterranean"...

This is just too much.

If I don't see them being, like, the father of my children,

then, like, I just don't see the point of dating them.

Nat's just so confusing, man.

She needs to decide does she wanna be, like,

a really good friend, or does she wanna lie in bed

and kiss all night?

Hey, guys!

I grew up in Decatur, Alabama,

and it's just a small town, with small-town charm.

I'm gonna shoot some from here, okay?

Nice.

Butt up in the air, legs crossed.

My God.

Tash told me about her ex,

they have had difficulties for years.

So, obviously there's always a bit of hope

she would run away from her boyfriend,

and look who would be there.

No.

If you think you're gonna come for me like

you come for everyone else, you're highly ****ing mistaken.

I'll switch that bitch off in two ****ing seconds.

She's saying you and I need to manage our time properly,

we're the most ridiculous chief stews...

- Wait, wait, wait. - ...your job.

Don't talk about a crew member in front of me.

And I called you a bitch behind your back, number two.

- Who'd you to, Tash? - To David.

Yesterday, he goes, "I called you a bitch,"

and I was like, "Okay."

No, I wanted to be honest,

because that came out like I hate you.

I'm glad you were honest.

No, I told her, I hate calling women bitches,

that really irritates me, when...

He did.

Are you being a bitch?

- You and Captain Sandy? - Are you being a bitch?

- How am I a bitch? - You and Captain Sandy?

She stepped in and she said, "No."

I've got nothing to speak about.

I told you what I told you, facts.

No, you didn't mention a few other things.

I've got nothing else more to explain to you than what I did.

If you're looking for attention, you're not gonna get it from me.

- Kyle... - Look at you now.

"Look at you now."

- Cut this bullsh** - Kyle, pipe down.

And Nat, stop.

BELOW DECK MEDITERRANEAN* Season 07 Episode 16

Episode Title: "The Scorpion Queen" Aired on: October 17, 2022.

Looking for attention.

Yeah.

- Cut this bullsh** - Kyle, pipe down.

You've been ****ing Tash**

I'm literally the most calmest person sitting here.

- Kyle... - I'm ****ing calm. Read me.

You're the one causing drama already.

No, it's not...

You been having this fun time. I ****ing apologized to you,

you got more problems with me.

Face your ****ing sh**

Yeah, it's not me, it's the team.

- You just did it. - Guys, stop.

Kyle, come on.

I know that you're not trying to be a ****ing knob

or whatever, but...

I'm not gonna apologize again for this.

But it wasn't...

it wasn't that type of vibe, it was very chill.

I'm not saying...

Yeah, but Nat, you acted super off to me, and, like,

all I've done is try and be super nice to you.

And I'm sorry that I didn't...

No, not you, I'm speaking about me.

My team, I just feel like

everything's just exploded into this big drama.

This is the most traumatic, dramatic table

I've ever sat at in my life.

It is becoming a ****ing sh** show.

I feel like I need to stop it, but I don't know...

I don't know what to do.

Trust me, it's not normally this wild.

I get along with everybody, but I'm not having someone yell,

"Face the facts, bitch," and walk off.

- Bosun's chair, sit down. - Bosun's chair, sit...

- stand... stand up! - Stand up!

So, what's the plan?

I'll sit at the opposite side of the table.

But I'm not gonna shut up for people who constantly attack.

No, I appreciate the way

that you stick up for all of the crew.

No!

I understand I'm in a restaurant setting,

I understand why I'm, like, trying to remain calm,

when normally, if I were called a bitch,

that is not how I'd remain.

If you wanna see angry, wait till we get back to the yacht

when I actually give that 'tude back to Kyle.

And it's, like, the one thing that I learned in conflict

is that if you're in public, deal with it later.

- Yeah, but what can I do? - Private.

- I'm sitting here calm. - In private.

You deal with it later.

Not at all, after what you just said to me.

We are not any longer...

we are colleagues, we are not friends

after how you just acted to me.

Kyle.

Okay, that's tragic, but...

I actually have.

- Kyle, please. - I don't care, Kyle.

Just ignore what she's saying,

block it out, and then say, okay, you know what, cool.

I have no idea what this is about, but fortunately enough,

in college, when people got drunk, they fought.

I would try to lessen the tension

- Nat, look, I'm not... - Reid, keep it to yourself.

I think you guys just need to hold your peace.

Tash, there's holding peace and then there's ****.

You know what you need to say to him.

- You don't speak... - I'm not at work right now.

- But... - It's happened in work.

I've spoken to...

It happened in work and you were there, you...

- It's your role to say... - I wasn't there.

You can't call someone a bitch, that's your colleague.

I don't know what happened, I'm sorry.

Oh, don't worry, I'll tell you.

Tash, you're chief stew, you're the chief stew.

If you want to, like this not to happen out of work,

you should have handled this within work hours.

All right, let's go.

She's got no balls whatsoever.

Hello, hello!

What up, Gs.

That's really cute.

Don't sit at the end.

We don't need gaps in the table, Dave.

They don't want to sit next to each other.

We've got two charters left.

I never have to see Nat's face again,

she never has to see mine.

All three of you, you're interior.

Like, everyone speak.

I don't want to be affected in this.

You're the chief stew, so you're affected in this,

because you haven't stood up for me and said

when he called me bitch. You are the chief stew.

You've not addressed my colleague.

Guys, you're adults. I'm not sticking up for anybody.

- Period, she hasn't. - She hasn't

Guys, if you wanna talk, argue it out between you both.

I don't need to...

No, Tash, you are the chief stew.

What do you want me to say?

You called me a bitch within work hours in front of the...

the captain heard it.

You called me a bitch...

It's got nothing to do with me.

You called me a bitch, so the...

Look at that.

I will... Look at your attitude!

Look at your attitude.

That is the most tragic thing

I've ever seen in my absolute life.

- Nat ****ing hell. - Okay, well, I'm off.

Mzi, I found a McDonald's for you.

I walked inside, I ordered six cheeseburgers,

and they said, "Sorry, we're closed."

Where is she?

Right now, what needs to happen is...

- Is I go home? - You go home... Yeah.

With Storm...

Storm, you're gonna go home with Nat.

- No. - Yes, you are.

I don't think she wants to.

No, Storm, shut the **** up, you're gonna go home with Nat.

Sure.

Define "bitchy" how you want to...

that's immature bitchy attitude.

I want to literally go and put knives in Kyle's pillow.

I went on my hands and knees to apologize to her.

She accepted it, and you still wanna

attack me across the table.

Why don't we stop talking about it

and talk about something else?

I'm really sorry how everything's turned out.

The thing is, I'm glad I got... I'm glad

said this from day one, yes, I was angry at the table

before, obviously, but that's angry because to be honest...

What's that?

I don't know, I just put it in my bra.

- I was annoyed. - You had every right to be.

You forgot to mention, it's like,

you know how the situation happens with, like...

Yes, of course. I apologize.

Okay, guys, what the **** is going on?

Well, of course, I have your back more than anything.

This situation needs to be resolved.

You know, like, you're the chief stew.

At some point you have to have a bit of professionalism and be,

like, right, Nat's not okay, I'm gonna speak to her.

I just wanna deal with this tomorrow.

Like, I'm not taking any sides.

You three need to have a chat.

Perfect.

Tomorrow morning, you three need to have a chat.

I know we don't have much to talk about,

but I don't wanna be in the middle of that.

I've been ****ing frustrated with Nat

and how things have been for us.

I don't wanna get hurt, you know?

But to see her like this, you know, I still...

I care about her.

I just wanna make sure she's okay, yeah.

Mm-hmm.

Hey!

Lads and ladies, let's go.

- You'll be all right, Tash. - Yeah.

There's only 10 days left.

I appreciate your support when I've needed it.

Always. I'm always there.

Not just today, always.

What time is it, is it midnight?

Tash.

What?

You're a very complicated person, Tash.

I know, I'm sorry I'm not a vibe.

I just want the truth, that's all, nothing else.

I kind of probably should give up at this point,

but I still think there is a little bit of hope

with me and Tash.

I can't help it, it's just the way I feel.

Huh?

Let's go.

Ah... oh! No, come in, dude!

No, he's in a bad mood.

What up, D-Money?

Oh, yeah.

It was just a bad argument tonight.

Period.

Ah, thank you, my friend.

Ooh.

sh** day and a sh** night.

Going to bed now.

Okay, good night.

Night-night.

How was your night?

Yeah, I don't know, it was fine.

Coming up...

Are you sure this is safe?

Yeah, yeah, you'll be fine.

Honestly, I've never been in a tender

with swells this bad before.

- ...Ing gnarly. - Whoa.

Oh! Oh!

I just feel like I have no need

to even bother going out next time.

Oh, my God.

Um, ****

I was like, you all need to ****ing speak.

Yeah.

This wind is making things difficult.

Ooh.

Jesus, I'm drunk.

The wind is terrible.

I do want Dave to realize that there are boundaries,

and that there is this line that he cannot cross.

Like, I don't wanna go back into that whole mess

that we were in before.

Oh sh**

I've got enough on my plate right now.

That's the last thing I want.

**** it.

I've done the swim platform on main deck.

I'm just gonna go around with a chamois on the railings,

because they're all sal-tay.

It's gonna be, like, over 30 knots of wind in here.

The swells are massive, what a bummer.

David, Natasha, Storm, meet me in the crew mess

for a preference sheet meeting.

Copy.

Okay.

Charter number eight, and we're all still together.

Hell, yeah.

Strong team.

Garold and Catherine Miller are no strangers to luxury boats

and have their own 58-foot sailing yacht.

They are looking forward to celebrating

their 25th wedding anniversary

and having the crew tend to their every need.

Lila, their youngest daughter, is a yacht broker,

and she's looking forward to celebrating

her 21st birthday on board.

What are you gonna do?

Well, when they arrive I'm gonna smash out some sushi.

Then for their 25th anniversary celebration,

so, a Spanish theme, yeah, we can either go tapas

or we can just do a big paella.

Great idea.

The Millers spend their summers jet-skiing, snorkeling,

so they want all water toys out all the time.

Too bad, it doesn't look like we're gonna get off the dock.

sh**

We have a major weather system coming in.

This is not gonna change.

There is no way I'll be able to get off the dock,

because it'll be so rough out there

there's no protection in this weather.

The pressure's on, huh?

- Thank you. - Thank you.

So, port side hasn't been washed?

- Yeah, it has. - It has?

Yeah, I'm just washing the windows now.

It just needs drying. Okay.

- Good morning. - Hi.

Yeah.

Well, okay.

So, this is the meeting I would have liked to have yesterday,

but it actually ended up happening out.

Someone gets alcohol into their system,

it just gets heightened and raged.

There was no need to all be shouting.

That was just...

for me, the push-over was that cabin yesterday.

Then it wasn't just a situation where you called me a bitch,

it was a situation where you actually apparently got really

hotheaded to the point that Captain Sandy

actually stepped in, which I've heard,

and said that's not appropriate.

I agree that situation did happen, but I came down to you,

and I feel like I was wrong,

and that's 100 percent what I took on me.

I appreciate that apology,

but then you went ahead and called me

a bitch again last night.

So, you've just done it again,

so that apology means nothing to me.

Last night, in an out-of-work zone, you called me a bitch now

within my... which isn't a funny.

You've then called me a bitch at the table...

And I called you that, and I also said that to your face.

Exactly, you said it at the dinner table

in front of the crew.

It was not appropriate, and you last night...

And you attacking me in front of the crew

or in that time is appropriate?

- You're the... - You're talking about

Tash being professional,

you're talking about me being professional...

get your sh** together and you start acting professional.

I said... see, look how aggressive you're getting.

Look how aggressive your approach is, sis.

When that voice comes out, that is exactly...

Look at your voice.

- Kyle? - Yeah.

The difference here is that I say stuff to people's face,

not behind their back.

And if you wanna go down that trail...

- And I said everything... - I will take that.

I disagree with this, because I have heard

that I was called a bad manager,

I can't manage my time, I'm unapproachable...

I've never said you were unapproachable.

And these are all the things that were said behind my back.

Things get said about people in heat of the moment,

and I understand that, because clearly,

everyone said something.

I think maybe going forward, if you feel like there's something

that's upsetting you or needs to change,

then I think we just speak about it first.

Stop arguments later down the line of us getting stressed,

and I think we just try to make things better.

Okay, I agree with that.

Nat, I'm not blowing smoke in your ass,

I'm saying facts is facts.

Work-wise, you're outstanding.

I am genuinely apologetic for the use of the words.

I have no excuse but complete exhaustion,

and sorry, I just...

Can we just stop bitching now, because we...

I naturally defend myself.

I grew up having to be that.

I was bullied immensely in high school

and primary school, thrown in bins.

That was a very tough time for me.

With Nat, I haven't been thinking

where she's coming from.

It doesn't feel right.

Okay, new rule...

no one talk sh** about each other because I'm happy...

I wouldn't say... like I love us talking sh** about other people.

- Yeah. - Maybe not interior.

Let's not change too many things now.

- We're all good in here! - We're fine.

Coming up...

There's no chance.

I thought there was.

I just wanna run away.

The weather looks ****ing sh**

Oh, wow, it's coming off beautifully.

Towels, towels.

Towels, towels, more towels.

Yeah, I think I need a coffee

and I'm gonna grab a doughnut, too.

Did you... are you having a coffee, Kyle?

Yeah, I'm making coffees.

That's all right, I can just...

Sorry?

I'll make it.

What?

All crew, all crew, we have provisions.

All crew, we have provisions on the dock.

Copy.

When did the golf balls arrive?

Very light, this is going to be party decorations

for the next two days.

All crew, all crew, meet in the main salon in your whites

at 11:55 for a 12:00 arrival.

Copy for interior.

Oh, my God, it's just...

I don't know what this knot's from.

Ow!

I'm hungry.

Crew mess looks good.

The guests are actually walking up to us right now.

- We are coming home. - It's a sick boat.

All crew to the dock, please,

all crew to the dock for guest arrival.

- Oh, it's... - It's beautiful.

Yeah, I love it.

Oh, I'm so excited.

Oh, and there's our crew.

- Hi, guys. - Hi!

- Hey! - Hello!

Oh, my God, it's so elegant.

- Hi, I'm Garold. - Nice to meet you.

- Pleasure to meet you. - Hi, I'm Natasha.

Lila, nice to meet you.

Oh, I wore my boating shoes, so I can just slip 'em right off.

Dad's got the Guccis on.

- Welcome aboard... - Thank you.

Your Home away from home.

- Yeah. - Okay.

Our chief stew is gonna show you around.

Great.

And then I'm gonna come chat to you about the weather.

- Okay. - All right.

Okay.

The good weather, right, it's beautiful.

Oh, God.

- Yeah, at least it's sunny. - It's so sunny.

I don't know if it's the...

we're not leaving the dock today,

but I'll tell you about it in there.

- Okay. - Oh, my God.

Perfect tanning weather.

They see sunny skies, and right now the wind's not bad.

However, on the outside of this port it's really bad,

and wind brings waves, period.

There are big waves.

I'm literally gonna cry.

- That's a bummer. - What's that?

That we're not leaving the dock.

Yeah, I mean, it is a bummer, can you believe it?

All right, thank you.

- Here we go, cheers. - Thank you.

Cheers, Li.

Kinda look like a '90s porn star right now.

- Me? - Yeah, you do, very much.

- Moustache and glasses. - It's the yellow lenses, yeah.

Yeah.

You're taking us on the tour?

Yes, I am, is everyone ready?

- Yes. - Of course.

Ooh, this is so pretty.

Wow.

Oh, so, yeah, here's our lunch table.

Gorgeous.

It's ridiculous, isn't it?

So, this seems like the party place, up here.

- This is the party pad. - This is the party pad.

This is where we gotta have my birthday.

Yeah, we kinda heat this up because it's a bit cold.

I'll make it hotter when I get in.

Oh, wow.

Yeah.

Is this all of it?

Yeah.

Lunch will be served in 10 minutes,

so you've gotta hurry up.

All right, we'll hurry up.

We'll speed up.

Don't be shellfish.

Is there a certain time you might like to have lunch?

Do we wanna finish with the tour, freshen up,

maybe get settled a little, and then have lunch?

Yeah.

- So, should we say, like, 1:30? - 1:00?

Let's say 1:00.

What's the beam throughout here?

Like, this feels kinda, like, short, almost.

Do you... you mean, like, it's quite small?

The width.

Yeah, like, the beam of this room.

Oh, I can find out for you if you like.

- Yeah? - Yeah, sure.

I'm curious.

I've had a charter broker as a guest before,

and it was actually a nightmare.

He tested us.

He went around the boat and he did things

to check that we'd checked.

He stuck, like, a piece of chewing gum behind an apple

in a fruit bowl to check that we were checking the fruit bowls.

What year is this boat, do you remember, 2018?

It's 2016, '17.

Dave, Dave, Tasha.

They would like lunch at 1:00.

Hi.

Hi, I wanted to say hi.

- Since you're a boater... - Yeah.

I was gonna come talk to you guys.

- So, this is what we're... - Working with?

Yeah, it's terrible.

Oh, gosh.

Yeah, so this is the wave, so see this?

- Oh, my God. - This is meters.

- Yeah. - So, it's crazy.

It's bad.

Right now, we'd be... it would be dangerous to leave.

Yeah.

What do you think tomorrow?

Well, we can't leave the dock.

Tomorrow, we look at the weather.

Yeah, we'll just cross our fingers.

The minute it lays down, I'll take off.

Yeah. Okay.

Dave?

1:00 for lunch?

- Davey? - Yeah.

Thirty minutes to lunch.

Thirty minutes?

- They want it at 1:00? - Yeah, 30 minutes to lunch.

They want it at...

Where's my parents?

Oh, here they are.

I need a drink.

What's that?

How am I being rude?

I just, I... I... it's not my fault we're out of mint.

You've been rude to me all morning, Dave.

Sorry, how have I been rude to you?

I haven't said anything.

I'm just getting on with my job.

Exactly, that's the thing.

Well, then...

You won't communicate with me.

All right.

The wind here, but this is the waves.

Yeah.

It's deceiving, because you can't see the swell.

Do you want me to find a bay that we can go

and put you in the water with some of the toys?

Duck out with the tender, check it out.

All right, Courts and I are gonna go and have a look, okay?

Yeah.

I wanna go, like, swimming or something.

I wanna go do something, yeah.

Look at how cute Mom looks.

See if she'll marry me another 25 years.

We're gonna go to the other side of the marina

to go see if it's accessible for us to actually get in the water.

Yeah.

Will you tie my top a little tighter, actually?

Mom.

Thanks, mate.

Okay. You can go, Courts.

See, look at the horizon, it's ****ing gnarly.

Yeah, man. **** me.

You sure this is safe?

Yeah, yeah, you'll be fine.

Okay, punch it, straight up the middle.

**** me, like, honestly,

I've never been in a tender with swells this bad before.

Whoa.

All I can see is these massive ****ing waves,

like, holy ****.

No.

Yeah.

- I'm hungry. - This is so awesome.

Okay, they're having a seat now.

We're gonna start with the bread.

Okay, great.

Thank you.

- You're welcome. - Good job.

My stomach's going.

I took Courtney to where we usually do our water sports...

huge swells.

Not safe for the guests at all.

Okay, so you went through...

We went through the bridge, we went to the opposite side,

and it's not safe.

Honestly, the whole boat was like this at one point,

and like this.

- Hectic. - Yeah.

So, definitely not going out now.

Shall I take them to, like, a museum or something?

Just phone Rico and ask him can they organize

a tour guide and some cars?

Yeah, okay, good.

I'm glad you checked it out without the guests.

- All right, cool, thanks. - Yeah, me too.

That's always good.

It's just bad timing, and especially for this charter,

they're super active.

All they wanna do is water sports.

We need to think of something or we're totally screwed.

Sake, sake, sake, boom, boom, boom.

And then you chug it.

Oh, yeah, get it!

So proud, oh!

So proud of my girls.

Hey, dude, the ocean's too dangerous

for me to take them on.

It's terrible out there.

Is there any way that we can take them

on a guided tour today?

I know it's pretty late notice.

We recently went to some sort of fort and restaurants and stuff.

Is that something we could potentially do?

Let me know, thanks.

Ooh, what are these?

Prawn, avocado, and spicy salmon.

Oh, my God, this looks beautiful.

Thank you, what about the food?

Ah, this is the life.

I'm trying to think about what's next.

Yeah, right?

At 3:30, we need them on the swim platform.

We're taking them to the cannons,

and at least we can get them off the boat for, like, two hours.

Thank God.

Wow, you polished off those wontons, huh?

She might have been worried that you were gonna take them.

I think she was.

- Nat? - Hi, girl.

Kyle, you can do the cabins, turning them over.

You can go on a break.

Copy.

I'm, like, stuffed.

I wanna walk around the boat a little.

Let's go.

I'm gonna trip on this thing.

Kyle, Nat's gonna head on her break now.

Well, where is everyone?

I wanna ****ing be underway

and sit in those ...ing superhero chairs.

Hey, guys, we've organized for a private tour to this...

every afternoon at 12:00 and at 4:00 they set off cannons.

Okay.

So, basically, in half an hour, if you could make your way

to the stern, to the back of the boat,

we're gonna put you in a bunch of cars,

and then set the cannons of for you guys.

- Oh, up there? - Yeah.

- All right? - Yeah.

Hey Courts, will you get changed into your polo?

Yeah.

You, Mzi, and Reid are gonna go with them.

Okay, cool.

You guys are leaving in 15 minutes, okay?

Okay, sweet, I'll go get changed.

Ready, Lila Rose?

Yes.

Back into my schoolboy outfit.

Yeah, hello, hello.

- Hey, little buddy! - Hey, little buddy!

All right, I have my phone, right?

That's the most important thing, to take pictures.

I don't, but I don't need it.

You may call me a 12-year-old boy, but...

- Hi. - Hi.

All right, enjoy, guys. Have a good time, yeah?

- Yeah, kids in one? - Yeah.

Let's go shoot some cannons!

Hey.

Why didn't you come in earlier, I've been waiting.

Because I thought you were having a snooze.

Yeah, but I was waiting for you.

What exactly is going on right now?

We're going to a tower.

We're going to a tower, because they let of cannons.

Basically, these big cannons go off every day.

Have a cuddle, couple of kisses, and you fell asleep with me.

You guys, you think we're gonna get off the dock tomorrow?

I think we should get off tomorrow.

Awesome.

I hope we're able to get off the dock.

This is our last few days together.

Yeah.

Storm's really in the good books at the moment.

You know, I've been a little stressed lately with, like,

what's going on with, like, the interior,

so it's nice to have him, like, around to, like, cuddle.

It makes me happy to see him.

Don't tell him I said that.

Whoa.

Oh, my God!

Hey, guys, we're gonna go this way.

We're off to see some cannons.

Okay, are we good, have we got everyone?

All right, we have seven minutes still, we're okay.

Go, go, and we'll get you some drinks, ready for the cannons.

Oh, what can I get you to drink?

What do you have?

Prosecco, wine, beers, champagne.

- Rosé. - Rosé?

This is amazing.

That's beautiful.

In that corner, you know, see where the red boat...

- Yeah. - The big red ships are?

To the right of them in that little bay there,

that's where we wanna take you to do water sports tomorrow.

Okay.

If we can't leave the dock, then we'll head over there.

And it looks protected, at least.

If the weather's okay, are we gonna go out into the open?

Yeah, so, Captain Sandy wants to obviously

take the boat out as soon as we can.

So, if the swell gets a bit better, we will.

It's really hard to keep guests entertained for, like,

a full ****ing day, like, 12 hours.

They're all sailors, they're all in yachting.

Like, yeah, it's not a great situation.

I think the cannon's about to go.

Evening gun, fire!

- **** - Oh!

****

Coming up...

Do you guys not think dinner's taking a long time?

You can speak up, but...

- Well... - Just pace yourself, it's fine.

But, like, really.

Are these ready to go?

There are too many people hanging around.

Yeah.

What's going on out here?

We're going Spanish theme.

They want the theme to match the food.

Is today the anniversary?

Yeah, can you believe they've been together 25 years?

They don't look old enough for that.

Oh, my God, are you playing with your balls again, honey?

- Yeah. - Hope you enjoyed that.

- We loved it! - Yes, that was very cool.

So, if you want to ask any questions,

we just move near the guns there,

and I will give you any answers you like.

Okay.

So, do we think that tomorrow we're gonna get off the dock?

Right here.

Thanks, hon.

Have we go that Mad Hatter's cake stand somewhere?

Yeah, it's in the bilge.

I'll pull it out now.

Apparently we're gonna use it for dinner tonight on the table.

Oh, okay.

Talk to me, what's the dinner plan?

It's paella.

No.

sh**

So, I need massive spot on the table?

Set it up inside, then.

- Okay. - How many starters?

I'm kind of just doing as many as I can.

- Are you okay? - Not really.

I'm just having a hard time processing it.

There's no chance.

I thought there was.

But it's so dumb, it's stupid.

Like, I just wanna run away.

- Come on, David. - ...Ing hell.

Guys, that was awesome.

Thanks, Dad!

Yeah, yeah, yeah, beep, beep.

Dave seems like a bit in a mood, doesn't he?

Oh, he's not even talking to me at all?

Why, what has happened?

Not even a word.

He's been messaging me, so I told him to stop.

Oh, you ****.

- Right. - Silly things, it's just...

Yeah.

Well, hang in there.

You're doing so good to maintain.

The guests are here.

Are you able to come down and greet

with these sangrias that I've made?

- Yeah. - Welcome back.

Thank you.

Hi, guys, welcome back.

- How are you? - Hi.

How was that? Can I take it from you?

Yes, please, thank you.

More drinks?

Sangria.

You'll probably have time to, like, freshen up,

and if you wanna change.

I'm thinking, like, dinner at 8:00?

- I mean, I don't know. - Dinner at 8:30...

Well, yeah, 8:00, 8:30?

Perfect.

Ah.

We look good, baby.

I feel like I'm, like, a housewife.

I'm about to bake you a cherry pie.

I want you to pop my cherry pie.

Look at you.

Hey, you're looking a little crazy!

So, tensions are high.

What?

Like, I went down to the galley,

and he's being so short with her.

Ing hell.

Deck crew, deck crew,

we're gonna have to all help interior however we can.

Say!

Do you want any help, you want me to wash up?

- No, I'm good, mate. - Okay, no worries.

No, yeah, all good.

Hi.

Wow, this is awesome.

Who did that?

- Tash. - It was a magician.

- No, Tash did the roses. - Beautiful.

Considering we're on the dock,

the crew are pulling out every stop.

The table setting, the themes,

the courses that David has to make to keep up.

That's a lot of pressure on the chef.

They're all, like, committed to this, which I'm really happy,

to try to keep the guests happy.

How clever is that?

Okay, Dave, what do you need for cutlery?

Just need, like, ramekins and stuff, do you know?

Little dishes just to put this stuff in.

Oh, my God, that's so cool.

Mom, look what they did for you guys.

Oh my God, I love that, it's so pretty.

Yeah, well, let's eat.

- Did you see them on... - I'm starving, Mom.

I'm so sorry you're so hungry.

- I think we're... - Are you so hungry?

We have to wait a moment, though.

When are we eating, at 8:30?

Hey, happy anniversary.

Thanks, honey. I love you.

I love you, too.

Don't fill up to the top, top, top.

So, we've got rye and cacao bread.

Okay, rye and cacao.

What can I use for this, can I use this?

I don't know, man, you have to...

- that's not my... - Okay.

**** it, I don't know.

sh**, he's in a mood, and not good at all.

Thank you, fantastic, yeah.

Ladies and gentlemen, I'm sorry to disturb you.

Obviously, there's no rush, but to let you know,

we're ready for service when you are at the top, yeah.

- Oh, great. - Awesome.

Let's go.

Yeah, come hang.

- This is beautiful. - This looks so great.

The wines will roll out shortly,

but we'll start with the waters, all right?

Let's get this going.

Awesome.

Would you like sparkling or still water?

Sparkling, please.

Okay, Davey, guests are at the table,

they've started with the breads,

we're filling in waters now, all right?

Okay, mate.

Oh, my God, what are you making?

It's called a leg-spreader.

- Oh, my God. - I'm just making it up.

Tash is busy with cocktails, so I will be here.

Okay.

Do you mind if I start with these while...

You can go, yeah, you can do as you want, man.

He said that was rye bread with cacao, the dark one.

With what?

- Cacao, chocolate. - Rye with cacao chocolate.

Oh. Sorry, I thought you said "with cow."

- Yeah, with cow. - No, cacao.

Well, for you it's cow.

Are these ready to go?

Ing ****.

We have the Spanish tortilla.

Here, we have cod.

Shall I get a tray for this?

Yeah, all right, mate.

Can you take one of these trays, please?

- Yes. - And...

Hello.

- Ooh! - Hola!

There are too many people hanging around.

Yeah.

Too many people asking questions.

Random plastic bag, may look like rubbish**

they use this for stuff.

So, pop that in here.

These underwear... dirty, don't touch them.

- Which would you like? - What is it again?

- This is cod. - Yeah?

In flour batter,

and then we have mentega over there.

Yeah, I'll pass. Thank you.

No worries. You're welcome.

I don't know what I've been told...

where do these plates go?

If this has been used, throw it away?

It's not been used, it's a shower cap.

- It's a shower? - Cap.

Oh, for the head.

So, what's coming next?

Chicken and prawn paella.

There you go.

Dave, just to let you know, we're clearing now.

- You're clearing now, okay. - Ready for the paella.

Okay.

Food.

So, we're gonna put the paella out,

we'll go round the table, all round the table with it.

Oh, I thought we were gonna just come and present it and be,

like, here's your chicken...

Yeah, so, all round the table, exactly,

and then we go back to the top bar...

To the bar, yeah.

And then we serve it on the...

you'll ask if they want chicken or prawn.

Then we'll serve it and then we'll dish it out to them, yeah?

Yeah.

Okay.

It's unprofessional that Dave's trying to give me

the cold shoulder just from trying to set

a boundary towards him.

Our job is communicating,

especially with these guests.

- Is it clear? - It's clear now.

- So, are we ready to start? - Yeah.

- See what I'm doing here? - Yeah.

We're diamonding it off to say

"We've been here, we've touched your toilet paper."

Do you guys not think dinner's taking a long time?

You can speak up, like...

- Well, it's... - Just pace yourself, it's fine.

- Like, relax, enjoy. - But, like, really...

Oh, they're bringing sangria... uh-oh.

- Okay, we'll ask him. - What's taking a while...

yeah, it's taking a little while.

No, Dad, at any restaurant,

we'd be, like, what the hell's going on.

No, it's fine.

Primary's daughter was saying, like,

"If this was a restaurant, he'd be complaining."

Really?

Yeah, so why isn't he complaining now.

Primary's daughter, Lila, they're not stoked.

We're gonna go to the restroom.

I'm just annoyed,

and at this point it's just, like, embarrassing.

The service is supposed to be seven-star service.

It's been slow as **** all night,

What?

Why?

And the next course, how long...

- when is that gonna be ready? - Yes.

I'll go check in the galley.

So, tomorrow, off the dock,

or what do we think about tomorrow?

Positive thoughts we're getting off the dock,

and we're gonna be going down that slide tomorrow.

Hopefully.

If you're going on that slide, you better have one.

I have special clothes for that.

Everything's strapped in.

There'll be, like, duct tape.

Okay, so three chicken...

Sorry?

It seems like there's some major tension

between David and Natasha, and I'm not sure why.

So, I'm going to keep my eye on them so they stay at that level.

So, here's the one with both.

Oh, that's delicious-looking.

Oh, thank you.

Tell me what you want as we go, and then...

Three shrimp, I think I said... did I say?

And two chicken.

My rice is crispy.

Dad, you probably shouldn't eat that,

I don't think it's that good.

I don't think it's seven-star amazing.

I think it's good, I just don't think it's, like, wow.

It's just, like, different.

It's not, like, what you're used to, I feel like.

What?

I'm not gonna say sh** now, yeah.

I feel like telling Dave about this paella right now

is not gonna help any situation,

because to make a new paella would take around 45 minutes.

And these guests clearly do not wanna wait

any longer for any more food.

Sorry, it's just, like, oh, my God.

It's not the best thing he's made us yet.

Yeah, no.

Can I take anything else, Dave, or is it all up there now?

- That's it for now. - Okay.

They're eating away, yeah?

Yeah, they're all happy, thanks, Dave.

All right, good night, everybody.

Thank you guys so much for dinner.

- Bye! - Thank you so much.

- Good night! - Keep it separated, guys.

Wait, Isaac, remember, boys in the bunk and girls in the room.

You go to your room, and...

Ai-yi-yi.

Just keep the buns in the bread aisle.

What time do you want me to go down?

You guys... you can go down now.

Okay, they're going down.

Dinner was amazing.

Kind of.

Oh, she's literally gorgeous.

You're so in love.

Are you kidding me?

You're in love.

Am I allowed to appreciate the fact that somebody's really hot?

- Yeah. - She's very hot.

Happy anniversary. I love you.

Don't do anything I wouldn't do, and if you do,

- name it after me, okay? - Nope.

Whew, what a night.

- Good night. - Okay, sweet dreams.

Good night.

You're going to bed?

See you in the morning.

Is there talk of us going off the dock tomorrow?

I don't think anyone knows, to be honest.

Can't see it happening, but...

See you later, tip.

Yeah.

All right, see you in the morning.

All right, thank you.

Oh! Oh!

What was that?

- Nat! - What just happened?

- Oh! - Kyle!

Oh sh**

- Oh! - Kyle has fallen.

Ah, oh.