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1
00:00:03,900 --> 00:00:05,699
How's the letter to your
daddy coming, poodle?
2
00:00:05,700 --> 00:00:08,201
Just got to give
it a little kiss...
3
00:00:08,800 --> 00:00:11,001
a little spritz...
4
00:00:11,400 --> 00:00:13,401
a little kiss...
5
00:00:13,800 --> 00:00:15,201
...a little spritz.
6
00:00:15,700 --> 00:00:18,099
You know, we've narrowed
down the identity
7
00:00:18,100 --> 00:00:20,101
of Jack's father.
8
00:00:20,600 --> 00:00:22,499
It's either one of the
eleven Black brothers
9
00:00:22,500 --> 00:00:24,701
of New Canaan, Connecticut
10
00:00:25,400 --> 00:00:28,401
or Paul Lynde, the center square.
11
00:00:30,410 --> 00:00:32,609
So I'm writing to each
one of the brothers
12
00:00:32,610 --> 00:00:34,811
and here's what I have so far...
13
00:00:35,610 --> 00:00:38,809
"Dear Mr. Black, my name
is Jack McFarland, M.D."
14
00:00:38,810 --> 00:00:41,911
Please hold all
comments till the end!
15
00:00:43,510 --> 00:00:47,009
"If you were at a
costume party in 1968
16
00:00:47,010 --> 00:00:49,509
wearing a Nixon mask
and had sexual relations
17
00:00:49,510 --> 00:00:51,409
with a woman who was dressed
as the back part of a horse
18
00:00:51,410 --> 00:00:53,511
you're my father!
19
00:00:54,510 --> 00:00:57,609
Please understand that I
am not asking for money. "
20
00:00:57,610 --> 00:00:58,811
Yeah.
21
00:01:00,620 --> 00:01:02,421
I know, right?
22
00:01:04,020 --> 00:01:05,919
"My phone number is... " blah blah.
23
00:01:05,920 --> 00:01:07,719
"You can call me between the
hours of... " blah and blah.
24
00:01:07,720 --> 00:01:11,719
"Sincerely... " blah, blah,
blah. "Oh, P.S.... " blah.
25
00:01:11,720 --> 00:01:13,019
So what do you think?
26
00:01:13,020 --> 00:01:15,719
I'd replace the first
blah with the second blah,
27
00:01:15,720 --> 00:01:17,621
and I think the
letter's ready to go.
28
00:01:32,120 --> 00:01:34,919
I'm rethinking my scuba
outfit for the trip.
29
00:01:34,920 --> 00:01:36,819
'Cause Joe and Larry are
gonna be all in basic black
30
00:01:36,820 --> 00:01:40,401
and I've got red flippers
and a yellow snorkel.
31
00:01:40,630 --> 00:01:43,931
Even the clownfish are gonna
be like, "Mmm, too busy. "
32
00:01:45,630 --> 00:01:48,499
Oh, my god. There he is. Don't
look around like a crazy person.
33
00:01:48,500 --> 00:01:51,131
Who? where? Who? where? there?
34
00:01:51,730 --> 00:01:55,331
Was it the simplicity of the
instructions that confused you?
35
00:01:55,830 --> 00:01:59,329
Over at the counter.
What do I call him?
36
00:01:59,330 --> 00:02:01,631
Is he my boyfriend?
My significant other?
37
00:02:01,930 --> 00:02:03,529
How about the man
you're afraid to talk to?
38
00:02:03,530 --> 00:02:05,501
That works too.
39
00:02:06,630 --> 00:02:09,131
Now, tell me again how you
two didn't end up as a couple?
40
00:02:09,930 --> 00:02:12,731
Well... we never met at the gym
41
00:02:12,940 --> 00:02:15,601
and one thing didn't
lead to another.
42
00:02:15,840 --> 00:02:18,739
Classic
boy-doesn't-meet-boy story.
43
00:02:18,740 --> 00:02:22,641
Oh, Lord, what have I
done to deserve this?
44
00:02:25,600 --> 00:02:28,341
Oh, right.
45
00:02:32,940 --> 00:02:34,939
Oh, look, honey. It's your
non-imaginary boyfriend.
46
00:02:34,940 --> 00:02:37,741
What's his name...
Jethro? Billy Bob?
47
00:02:38,340 --> 00:02:40,639
He's not my boyfriend.
I don't have a boyfriend.
48
00:02:40,640 --> 00:02:42,339
- She dumped that loser.
- No, she didn't.
49
00:02:42,340 --> 00:02:43,639
- Yes, I did.
- She did.
50
00:02:43,640 --> 00:02:45,941
- No, she didn't.
- I said I did.
51
00:02:47,150 --> 00:02:50,051
Sorry, that wasn't meant for you.
52
00:02:50,750 --> 00:02:53,851
Oh, hey, baby. I didn't
know you were here.
53
00:02:57,950 --> 00:02:59,549
Hi.
54
00:02:59,550 --> 00:03:01,351
Oh, hi, Willard.
55
00:03:02,350 --> 00:03:03,651
I like your leotard.
56
00:03:05,050 --> 00:03:08,051
Listen, I'm gonna grab a juice. I'll
be back to smooch on you in a second.
57
00:03:12,550 --> 00:03:14,849
So the whole time you've
been dating this guy
58
00:03:14,850 --> 00:03:16,951
sneaking around behind my back?
59
00:03:17,350 --> 00:03:19,699
God! I feel like Captain Von Trapp
60
00:03:19,700 --> 00:03:22,651
and you're Liesl making out
with that Nazi in the gazebo.
61
00:03:23,560 --> 00:03:26,959
We're not dating. My God,
you overstate everything.
62
00:03:26,960 --> 00:03:28,459
How many times have you seen him?
63
00:03:28,460 --> 00:03:31,861
I don't know. A couple
of times. Two... 12...
64
00:03:32,560 --> 00:03:34,359
Oh, so that's why
when you disappear
65
00:03:34,360 --> 00:03:37,759
every night for five hours, you
bring me back a little present.
66
00:03:37,760 --> 00:03:40,459
You're just trying to create a diversion
so I wouldn't ask you any questions.
67
00:03:40,460 --> 00:03:43,359
Hey, what are you complaining
about? You got some lovely things.
68
00:03:43,360 --> 00:03:44,959
How many compliments have
you gotten on that leotard?
69
00:03:44,960 --> 00:03:46,959
It's not a leotard!
70
00:03:46,960 --> 00:03:49,461
It's a fitted-T.
71
00:03:52,670 --> 00:03:55,569
Please, I'm sorry. I'm sorry
I've kept this from you.
72
00:03:55,570 --> 00:04:00,171
But what can I say?
I like him. A lot.
73
00:04:00,870 --> 00:04:03,971
You know, do what you want. I
just... Keep him away from me.
74
00:04:04,470 --> 00:04:07,971
Fine. I just- God, I just wish that
you didn't have this thing with him.
75
00:04:08,670 --> 00:04:11,569
Can't you at least be my friend
and say you're happy for me?
76
00:04:11,570 --> 00:04:14,769
I'd like to. But you know, if
he's in your life, he's in my life
77
00:04:14,770 --> 00:04:17,369
- and I can't...
- Not even for some cashmere toe socks?
78
00:04:17,370 --> 00:04:19,571
I've been dying for these!
79
00:04:23,370 --> 00:04:27,899
Karen! guess what? I found him!
I found my daddy! He wrote back!
80
00:04:27,900 --> 00:04:29,679
Oh, peanut, that's
fantastic. What'd he say?
81
00:04:29,680 --> 00:04:32,979
He says his name is Joe, and there's
way too much to explain in the letter
82
00:04:32,980 --> 00:04:35,799
and that he wants
to meet me in person.
83
00:04:35,800 --> 00:04:40,379
Oh, honey, I am so happy for you. I am
gonna throw you a fabulous dinner party
84
00:04:40,380 --> 00:04:42,079
so that you can meet
your daddy in style.
85
00:04:42,080 --> 00:04:43,779
You'd do that for me?
86
00:04:43,780 --> 00:04:46,579
You'd open your home
to me and my family?
87
00:04:46,580 --> 00:04:50,881
Well, when you put
it that way... no.
88
00:04:52,980 --> 00:04:54,679
We'll do it at Will and Grace's.
89
00:04:54,680 --> 00:04:57,481
Hey, it'll give them a chance
to break out the good plastic.
90
00:05:04,590 --> 00:05:09,589
Oh, that was really nice.
I thoroughly enjoyed myself.
91
00:05:09,590 --> 00:05:11,689
You know, I'm gonna write you a
little letter of recommendation
92
00:05:11,690 --> 00:05:14,991
because that should
be on your r�sum�.
93
00:05:15,890 --> 00:05:18,991
Let me ask you. How
would you rate me?
94
00:05:20,490 --> 00:05:22,089
What do you mean?
95
00:05:22,090 --> 00:05:23,691
On a scale from one to ten.
96
00:05:23,990 --> 00:05:25,689
And remember, the rule
is on the first time
97
00:05:25,690 --> 00:05:27,891
it's polite to round up.
98
00:05:29,490 --> 00:05:32,191
I'm not gonna rate you.
99
00:05:32,590 --> 00:05:35,991
I don't like it, either, but
that's the world we live in.
100
00:05:38,900 --> 00:05:40,901
Oh... All right.
101
00:05:42,200 --> 00:05:43,901
Eight.
102
00:05:44,800 --> 00:05:46,701
- You were a seven.
- What?
103
00:05:48,600 --> 00:05:51,801
That's good. I've never been
with anyone above a four.
104
00:05:52,100 --> 00:05:53,399
You're a pig.
105
00:05:53,400 --> 00:05:57,601
Now, let's see if I can
bring that score up to 7.2.
106
00:05:57,900 --> 00:06:01,501
I'm not here, I'm not here.
I'm just looking for the phone.
107
00:06:03,600 --> 00:06:06,901
- Hi.
- Hi. I'm Vicky, the ex.
108
00:06:07,300 --> 00:06:10,001
I'm Grace. The nude.
109
00:06:10,700 --> 00:06:13,401
Vick, can you give us
an hour? Come back later?
110
00:06:13,610 --> 00:06:17,011
An hour? Who are you kidding?
I'll be back in five minutes.
111
00:06:17,810 --> 00:06:20,311
I'm gonna get you for that!
112
00:06:22,910 --> 00:06:24,511
Where were we?
113
00:06:25,510 --> 00:06:28,299
Why is your ex-girlfriend
still in your apartment?
114
00:06:28,300 --> 00:06:29,709
Don't worry, she's cool.
115
00:06:29,710 --> 00:06:33,511
You're secure enough to handle me
living with my ex-girlfriend, right?
116
00:06:34,300 --> 00:06:37,511
Hey, Will. Nathan's gonna
be living here for a while.
117
00:06:38,910 --> 00:06:42,301
Careful. that's a nasty
paper cut waiting to happen.
118
00:06:52,310 --> 00:06:54,811
Three second rule... still good.
119
00:06:59,120 --> 00:07:00,621
I'm not happy right now.
120
00:07:00,920 --> 00:07:03,321
See this face? It's
not a happy face.
121
00:07:03,820 --> 00:07:06,519
What was I supposed to do,
let him stay up there with her?
122
00:07:06,520 --> 00:07:08,721
It's creepy having a
third person around.
123
00:07:09,020 --> 00:07:10,921
You don't say.
124
00:07:12,620 --> 00:07:16,401
Oh, he's using my new Chantal
saut� pan with a metal-edge spatula.
125
00:07:16,920 --> 00:07:20,021
There is no way a cr�pe is
ever gonna slide off that now.
126
00:07:22,420 --> 00:07:25,719
You are more gay before nine A.M.
127
00:07:25,720 --> 00:07:27,921
than most people are all day.
128
00:07:30,120 --> 00:07:34,021
All right, hope you guys like my
phony bologna free-range omelets.
129
00:07:34,730 --> 00:07:38,331
Ah, yes. It's only bean curd,
but it's got the look of pig.
130
00:07:40,130 --> 00:07:43,031
I thought you gay
guys liked the bologna.
131
00:07:44,830 --> 00:07:46,529
I think you're
confusing the bologna
132
00:07:46,530 --> 00:07:49,931
with the same rights and privileges
afforded to married couples.
133
00:07:51,500 --> 00:07:55,031
Will, lighten up. It's
breakfast, not a pelvic exam.
134
00:07:57,130 --> 00:07:59,929
Well, forgive me if I don't
leap to take advice from someone
135
00:07:59,930 --> 00:08:03,731
whose family portrait includes
two bloodhounds and a pickup truck.
136
00:08:04,930 --> 00:08:10,131
Is it just me, or are the
squirrels in the park sneakier?
137
00:08:12,500 --> 00:08:15,529
Well, I get it. Because I'm
from the South, I must be stupid
138
00:08:15,530 --> 00:08:17,729
and because you're
gay, you must be clever.
139
00:08:17,730 --> 00:08:21,441
Just goes to show you how
wrong those stereotypes can be.
140
00:08:23,440 --> 00:08:27,941
Boy, if this day gets any better,
by noon I should be rolling in glass.
141
00:08:30,040 --> 00:08:31,341
Nathan.
142
00:08:31,640 --> 00:08:35,541
I might have been a little harsh on
him. He does have a flair for "repartee. "
143
00:08:38,840 --> 00:08:41,641
This has gotta stop. You've
got to get along with Will.
144
00:08:41,940 --> 00:08:46,741
- I'm just being myself.
- I know, baby. That's what's gotta stop.
145
00:08:51,540 --> 00:08:54,539
Honey, what is going on here?
There's fingerprints on the China
146
00:08:54,540 --> 00:08:56,839
spots on the silver,
the vodka is warm.
147
00:08:56,840 --> 00:08:59,541
What is this, junior high?
148
00:09:02,440 --> 00:09:04,839
Now, Jack is meeting his
actual father tonight.
149
00:09:04,840 --> 00:09:06,149
Get it together.
150
00:09:06,150 --> 00:09:10,151
Hey, back off or I will force you
into brightly colored poly blend.
151
00:09:11,650 --> 00:09:14,951
What's with the gratuitous
violence, Hannibal Adler?
152
00:09:16,450 --> 00:09:19,951
Hello, will my moped be
safe outside the building?
153
00:09:20,950 --> 00:09:21,849
Yeah.
154
00:09:21,850 --> 00:09:25,049
Miss Karen, thank
you for inviting me.
155
00:09:25,050 --> 00:09:27,349
I know that Jack and I
aren't married anymore
156
00:09:27,350 --> 00:09:30,049
but part of me still
thinks of him as family.
157
00:09:30,050 --> 00:09:33,149
Oh, that's sweet, honey, but
you're not here to attend the party
158
00:09:33,150 --> 00:09:35,151
you're here to work the party.
159
00:09:35,960 --> 00:09:38,359
So, strip off that bug
trap you call a jacket
160
00:09:38,360 --> 00:09:41,461
put on an apron, and
shake hands with Mr. Clean.
161
00:09:42,560 --> 00:09:43,661
Sorry I took so long.
162
00:09:43,960 --> 00:09:46,359
I ran into my imaginary
boyfriend down at the market.
163
00:09:46,360 --> 00:09:50,061
He was standing in the checkout line,
so I had no choice but to check him out.
164
00:09:50,460 --> 00:09:51,559
Did you talk to him?
165
00:09:51,560 --> 00:09:55,801
I would've, but I was too
busy choking on my fear.
166
00:09:56,960 --> 00:09:59,801
Oh, hello, Grace-ious.
167
00:10:02,160 --> 00:10:04,661
I'm sorry. I didn't realize
that this dinner was formal.
168
00:10:05,160 --> 00:10:09,561
Oh, it's an easy mistake. I'm sure that's
considered formal wear at Se�or Frog's.
169
00:10:11,670 --> 00:10:15,671
Well, I guess it doesn't
work here at Se�or Tightass.
170
00:10:18,770 --> 00:10:20,571
What is he doing here?
171
00:10:20,870 --> 00:10:23,869
I just figured since Jack
was meeting his father
172
00:10:23,870 --> 00:10:26,869
for the first time tonight, that the
whole evening could have a theme...
173
00:10:26,870 --> 00:10:31,899
Togetherness, you know? Jack and
his father... You and Nathan...
174
00:10:31,900 --> 00:10:33,901
Karen and her drink...
175
00:10:34,570 --> 00:10:38,171
Thanks for coming. I love you.
176
00:10:39,570 --> 00:10:42,169
Will, this is a temporary
arrangement, and he's important to me
177
00:10:42,170 --> 00:10:45,371
so as long as he's here,
will you just make an effort?
178
00:10:46,380 --> 00:10:47,181
Please, it would
mean so much to me.
179
00:10:47,580 --> 00:10:50,579
Fine, fine, but I'll tell you right
now, I am not gonna whittle or tie
180
00:10:50,580 --> 00:10:52,681
my pants with a rope.
181
00:10:54,880 --> 00:10:59,181
So, Nathan, tell me, what
kind of work do you do?
182
00:10:59,780 --> 00:11:01,581
Oh, I don't work. I've
got my spleen money.
183
00:11:01,880 --> 00:11:05,981
Right, right. I don't
know what that means.
184
00:11:06,380 --> 00:11:09,999
Well, about a year ago, I
took a spill on my motorbike...
185
00:11:10,000 --> 00:11:11,079
wheel came off, I went flying
186
00:11:11,080 --> 00:11:14,779
lost a spleen. The bike company
coughed up a butt-load of money
187
00:11:14,780 --> 00:11:16,981
and I've been living
off of that ever since.
188
00:11:18,100 --> 00:11:19,789
- Pretty cool, huh?
- Yeah, with the market being down the way it is
189
00:11:19,790 --> 00:11:23,091
you may want to lacerate
a kidney and reinvest.
190
00:11:24,090 --> 00:11:25,891
Well, I've got my IRA.
191
00:11:28,090 --> 00:11:30,691
- What do you do?
- I'm a lawyer.
192
00:11:30,990 --> 00:11:34,489
I'm a man without a spleen.
You're a man without a heart.
193
00:11:34,490 --> 00:11:38,101
Maybe we should take a trip to Oz.
194
00:11:39,790 --> 00:11:42,689
Hello, what's going
on? What'd I miss?
195
00:11:42,690 --> 00:11:46,099
We're just saying what
we do for a living.
196
00:11:46,100 --> 00:11:47,391
Oh, bad topic for both of you.
197
00:11:50,100 --> 00:11:51,389
How about things that
you have in common
198
00:11:51,390 --> 00:11:52,999
likes, dislikes?
199
00:11:53,000 --> 00:11:54,799
Well, I hate making small talk
200
00:11:54,800 --> 00:11:56,701
with people that I have
nothing in common with.
201
00:11:57,100 --> 00:11:58,701
Me, too.
202
00:11:59,100 --> 00:12:01,301
See? there you go.
203
00:12:01,800 --> 00:12:02,799
But what I really hate
204
00:12:02,800 --> 00:12:05,001
is when someone licks
their finger like this...
205
00:12:05,600 --> 00:12:08,301
And then sticks it
in my ear like that.
206
00:12:12,000 --> 00:12:12,701
This has been fun.
207
00:12:13,100 --> 00:12:16,401
Yeah, if you'll excuse me, I'm
gonna go dip my head in alcohol.
208
00:12:16,910 --> 00:12:19,611
Oh, wait for me. Wait for...
209
00:12:25,910 --> 00:12:28,411
Papa, can you hear me?
210
00:12:31,300 --> 00:12:33,411
Papa, can you see me?
211
00:12:34,310 --> 00:12:37,511
Papa, can you find me in the night?
212
00:12:38,910 --> 00:12:42,011
Oh, hey, crunchy. I
don't believe we've met.
213
00:12:42,610 --> 00:12:44,711
Nathan. I'm Grace's boyfriend.
214
00:12:45,410 --> 00:12:49,111
That's weird. I'm not
getting a gay vibe from you.
215
00:12:56,510 --> 00:12:57,911
So, how you doing, pal? you ready?
216
00:12:58,300 --> 00:13:01,009
Yeah, I think so. I
did a papaya salt scrub
217
00:13:01,010 --> 00:13:03,009
a cucumber mask, a
hot oil scalp treatment
218
00:13:03,010 --> 00:13:04,819
and two shots of wheatgrass.
219
00:13:04,820 --> 00:13:07,821
Wow, you're more than ready.
You're a gay salad bar.
220
00:13:09,420 --> 00:13:12,401
Everything's food
with you, isn't it?
221
00:13:14,820 --> 00:13:18,419
What do you think dad's gonna be like?
Oh, I Don't care if he's rich or poor
222
00:13:18,420 --> 00:13:21,921
fat or thin, just as long
as he's rich and thin.
223
00:13:22,820 --> 00:13:26,821
Oh, honey, take it from
me. Rich and fat works, too.
224
00:13:29,820 --> 00:13:32,421
Uma Thurman Hawke, he's here!
225
00:13:34,020 --> 00:13:36,421
Ok, I'm gonna answer the door.
226
00:13:36,820 --> 00:13:40,319
No, that'll seem needy, but I
am needy, but needy's not hot
227
00:13:40,320 --> 00:13:43,121
but I'm hot, so it doesn't
matter. Papa, can you hear me?
228
00:13:46,930 --> 00:13:50,631
Jack, take it easy. You're
having a Yentl breakdown.
229
00:13:52,500 --> 00:13:55,929
Ok. I'm gonna play it cool
230
00:13:55,930 --> 00:13:58,831
and let him come to me.
231
00:14:02,130 --> 00:14:05,329
Hi. I'm Jo Black. I'm
looking for Jack McFarland.
232
00:14:05,330 --> 00:14:07,131
Daddy!
233
00:14:09,330 --> 00:14:12,329
No, no, there's something
I need to explain.
234
00:14:12,330 --> 00:14:16,431
I know, daddy. You're a woman,
but on some level, who isn't?
235
00:14:16,930 --> 00:14:20,931
No, Jack. No, no. That's why
I wanted to meet you in person.
236
00:14:21,330 --> 00:14:25,501
My name is JoAnne Black.
I'm Joe Black's wife.
237
00:14:25,740 --> 00:14:28,541
Oh, nice to meet
you. Where's my papa?
238
00:14:29,540 --> 00:14:33,341
I am so sorry. I really don't
quite know how to say this, but...
239
00:14:33,940 --> 00:14:36,741
your father died five years ago.
240
00:14:43,600 --> 00:14:47,341
Will you excuse me for a minute?
241
00:14:54,640 --> 00:14:56,839
Honey, it must be a relief
242
00:14:56,840 --> 00:15:00,041
to finally have someone
else kill your party.
243
00:15:09,940 --> 00:15:11,741
How you doing?
244
00:15:13,540 --> 00:15:16,641
Come on, Jack. You've
been in here all night.
245
00:15:16,940 --> 00:15:18,941
Come on, talk to me.
246
00:15:20,840 --> 00:15:24,141
Who's the prettiest
lady in this room?
247
00:15:25,450 --> 00:15:26,201
Me.
248
00:15:28,502 --> 00:15:30,902
My dad is gone, Will.
249
00:15:31,050 --> 00:15:32,549
I'm never gonna meet him.
250
00:15:32,550 --> 00:15:35,649
He'll never teach me to
ride a bike or throw a ball
251
00:15:35,650 --> 00:15:37,751
or kiss a man.
252
00:15:38,450 --> 00:15:39,851
I'm totally alone.
253
00:15:40,150 --> 00:15:42,449
Jack, what have you
really lost here?
254
00:15:42,450 --> 00:15:44,649
I mean, it would have been
great if you'd gotten to know him
255
00:15:44,650 --> 00:15:46,849
but he was not part
of your life before.
256
00:15:46,850 --> 00:15:49,751
He's not part of your life
now. What's really changed?
257
00:15:50,360 --> 00:15:52,801
But I loved him.
258
00:15:52,960 --> 00:15:54,661
But you didn't know him.
259
00:15:55,060 --> 00:15:56,461
But I loved him.
260
00:15:58,060 --> 00:16:00,459
Maybe you just loved
the idea of him.
261
00:16:00,460 --> 00:16:03,759
He was the source of all my talent.
262
00:16:03,760 --> 00:16:06,061
But you don't have any talent.
263
00:16:08,360 --> 00:16:11,461
- But I loved him.
- And here we are again.
264
00:16:14,560 --> 00:16:17,559
Coming in, coming in. Aam
I interrupting anything?
265
00:16:17,560 --> 00:16:19,159
Are you fellas having sex?
266
00:16:19,160 --> 00:16:20,661
- Oh, stop.
- Oh, God.
267
00:16:21,900 --> 00:16:24,071
Well, you know, I figured both
of you being gay and all...
268
00:16:24,670 --> 00:16:27,771
Yeah, that's pretty much how it
works. Just like if you see any woman.
269
00:16:28,070 --> 00:16:30,571
- Yeah.
- Ok, bad analogy.
270
00:16:31,170 --> 00:16:32,071
What do you want?
271
00:16:32,470 --> 00:16:35,069
Well, I thought after
what happened tonight
272
00:16:35,070 --> 00:16:36,869
maybe Jack could use a little Jack.
273
00:16:36,870 --> 00:16:38,771
Hello.
274
00:16:44,170 --> 00:16:47,899
Thanks, Nathan, but
when we're in pain
275
00:16:47,900 --> 00:16:49,769
we usually prefer just to talk it out
rather than, say, gettin' all liquored up
276
00:16:49,770 --> 00:16:52,871
and going down to the
dump and shooting rats.
277
00:16:53,480 --> 00:16:56,381
I was thinking more
of a memorial of sorts.
278
00:16:56,680 --> 00:16:58,079
You know, when someone
close to you dies
279
00:16:58,080 --> 00:17:02,079
it's important to remember them,
drink a toast, say good-bye.
280
00:17:02,080 --> 00:17:03,979
No, like I said, I don't
think that's the way Jack...
281
00:17:03,980 --> 00:17:04,879
I wanna do it.
282
00:17:04,880 --> 00:17:07,781
- What?
- I loved him.
283
00:17:08,080 --> 00:17:11,981
- But you didn't know him.
- But he loved him, Willard.
284
00:17:15,580 --> 00:17:18,979
Ok. Why don't you start, Will?
285
00:17:18,980 --> 00:17:23,381
- Oh, I don't know. I mean...
- Come on, Will. For me.
286
00:17:24,180 --> 00:17:25,681
Ok.
287
00:17:29,580 --> 00:17:32,081
I never had the opportunity
to meet Joe Black.
288
00:17:32,390 --> 00:17:34,791
Saw the movie, though. A bit
long, didn't care for it...
289
00:17:36,100 --> 00:17:37,091
Even though it had Brad Pitt in it.
290
00:17:37,590 --> 00:17:41,791
Didn't care for Snatch,
either. The movie. Anyway...
291
00:17:42,490 --> 00:17:44,889
Here's to you, Joe.
We hardly knew you.
292
00:17:44,890 --> 00:17:47,691
Actually, we didn't know ye at all.
293
00:17:48,790 --> 00:17:50,991
To Joe.
294
00:17:53,890 --> 00:17:57,391
- Well, thank you, Will.
- Jack, you're up.
295
00:17:58,090 --> 00:18:04,091
First of all, I'd like to
say thank you to Joe Black.
296
00:18:04,490 --> 00:18:08,391
Thank you for giving
me my piercing blue eyes
297
00:18:08,690 --> 00:18:11,591
my impossibly high cheekbones
298
00:18:12,200 --> 00:18:14,701
my rock-hard ass...
299
00:18:15,600 --> 00:18:17,801
And my feminine side...
300
00:18:18,100 --> 00:18:21,601
Which I did not get from my mother.
301
00:18:23,600 --> 00:18:25,201
In conclusion...
302
00:18:26,900 --> 00:18:28,901
Papa, how I love you papa...
303
00:18:29,600 --> 00:18:31,601
how I need you papa...
304
00:18:32,000 --> 00:18:38,601
how I miss you kissing
meeee good niiiiiiiiight...
305
00:18:58,000 --> 00:19:01,001
- Looking in the sky...
- To Joe!
306
00:19:05,100 --> 00:19:07,699
Well, terrific. I'm
glad we did that.
307
00:19:07,700 --> 00:19:10,801
It was a nice idea. Jack,
you want to do something?
308
00:19:11,110 --> 00:19:15,301
Maybe go down to the park and
laugh at the heterosexuals kissing?
309
00:19:15,710 --> 00:19:18,709
Wait a minute. I'd like
to say something about Joe.
310
00:19:18,710 --> 00:19:22,511
Oh, sorry. Go ahead. After all,
you knew him as well as we did.
311
00:19:25,310 --> 00:19:30,311
We're born, we grow,
we live, we die.
312
00:19:30,810 --> 00:19:33,009
If we're lucky, we
have family and friends
313
00:19:33,010 --> 00:19:35,611
who know us and love us.
314
00:19:36,300 --> 00:19:39,109
I never knew my dad.
But it doesn't matter...
315
00:19:39,110 --> 00:19:42,309
because wherever we
go and whatever we do
316
00:19:42,310 --> 00:19:45,709
we can know that the spirit of the
mother and the spirit of the father
317
00:19:45,710 --> 00:19:48,301
are alive in each of us.
318
00:19:48,720 --> 00:19:52,821
That everything good already
exists within ourselves.
319
00:19:53,320 --> 00:19:56,921
So, here's to Joe...
the father in all of us.
320
00:19:57,820 --> 00:20:00,321
To Joe.
321
00:20:03,400 --> 00:20:04,721
Thank you, Nathan.
322
00:20:05,400 --> 00:20:07,321
Ok, who wants another round?
323
00:20:18,420 --> 00:20:21,721
Oh, my God. I've
turned another one.
324
00:20:28,920 --> 00:20:32,401
To be continued...
325
00:20:44,102 --> 00:20:47,402
Team W&G ~seriessub. com~
26205
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