All language subtitles for This is Going to Hurt 1x01 (1080p)(hevc)(x265)

af Afrikaans
ak Akan
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bem Bemba
bn Bengali
bh Bihari
bs Bosnian
br Breton
bg Bulgarian
km Cambodian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
chr Cherokee
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch
en English Download
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
ee Ewe
fo Faroese
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gaa Ga
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gn Guarani
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ia Interlingua
ga Irish
it Italian Download
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
rw Kinyarwanda
rn Kirundi
kg Kongo
ko Korean
kri Krio (Sierra Leone)
ku Kurdish
ckb Kurdish (Soranî)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Laothian
la Latin
lv Latvian
ln Lingala
lt Lithuanian
loz Lozi
lg Luganda
ach Luo
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mfe Mauritian Creole
mo Moldavian
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
sr-ME Montenegrin
ne Nepali
pcm Nigerian Pidgin
nso Northern Sotho
no Norwegian
nn Norwegian (Nynorsk)
oc Occitan
or Oriya
om Oromo
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt-BR Portuguese (Brazil)
pt Portuguese (Portugal)
pa Punjabi
qu Quechua
ro Romanian
rm Romansh
nyn Runyakitara
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
sh Serbo-Croatian
st Sesotho
tn Setswana
crs Seychellois Creole
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhalese
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish
es-419 Spanish (Latin American)
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
tt Tatar
te Telugu
th Thai
ti Tigrinya
to Tonga
lua Tshiluba
tum Tumbuka
tr Turkish
tk Turkmen
tw Twi
ug Uighur
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
wo Wolof
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:08,018 --> 00:00:11,417 This programme contains some strong language from the start, 2 00:00:11,418 --> 00:00:14,337 scenes which some viewers may find upsetting 3 00:00:14,338 --> 00:00:16,697 and discriminatory language. 4 00:00:16,698 --> 00:00:18,498 He snores. 5 00:00:29,419 --> 00:00:33,539 Phone buzzes 6 00:00:37,499 --> 00:00:38,859 fuck. 7 00:00:40,859 --> 00:00:41,979 Shit! 8 00:00:45,139 --> 00:00:47,938 Hello? Hi, Adam. 9 00:00:47,939 --> 00:00:50,699 It's shruti, one of the shos. Sorry to disturb you. 10 00:00:50,700 --> 00:00:53,499 Erm, you're on the rota for labour ward today, 11 00:00:53,500 --> 00:00:56,099 and mr Lockhart... Er, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. 12 00:00:56,100 --> 00:00:58,819 Erm, tell him I'm really sorry. 13 00:00:58,820 --> 00:01:01,540 I think there's been an accident. I've been sat here for an hour... 14 00:01:02,580 --> 00:01:03,820 He groans 15 00:01:05,380 --> 00:01:06,940 and I'll be there in a minute. 16 00:01:08,660 --> 00:01:10,619 Well, I'm not dead, am I? 17 00:01:10,620 --> 00:01:13,139 Please tell me you haven't ordered a coffin. 18 00:01:13,140 --> 00:01:16,299 Of course I'm not having an affair. I wouldn't have the time. 19 00:01:16,300 --> 00:01:19,820 I just fell asleep last night when I went to the car. 20 00:01:19,821 --> 00:01:22,660 Who did you phone? Please tell me you haven't phoned the police. 21 00:01:22,661 --> 00:01:24,460 Well, who did you phone, then? 22 00:01:24,461 --> 00:01:26,020 Oh, sorry. 23 00:01:26,021 --> 00:01:27,261 Who did you phone, then? 24 00:01:28,461 --> 00:01:30,101 My mum?! 25 00:01:31,541 --> 00:01:33,980 Shit. Are you deranged? 26 00:01:33,981 --> 00:01:35,980 And what did she...? 27 00:01:35,981 --> 00:01:38,180 She cries out 28 00:01:38,181 --> 00:01:40,860 don't go anywhere. I'm going to call you right back. 29 00:01:40,861 --> 00:01:43,020 Is coming out! 30 00:01:43,021 --> 00:01:44,540 Is coming out! 31 00:01:44,541 --> 00:01:46,980 Well, a stroke of luck, you've come to the right place. 32 00:01:46,981 --> 00:01:48,661 Let's get you up to labour ward, shall we? 33 00:01:48,662 --> 00:01:50,461 It's, erm, a bit of a walk, I'm afraid. 34 00:01:50,462 --> 00:01:51,861 She cries out 35 00:01:51,862 --> 00:01:54,141 do you mind if I have a quick check? 36 00:01:54,142 --> 00:01:55,941 I'm a doctor. Probably should have said. 37 00:01:55,942 --> 00:01:57,381 I'm Adam. And you are...? 38 00:01:57,382 --> 00:01:59,221 Andrea. Andrea. 39 00:01:59,222 --> 00:02:00,862 She gasps 40 00:02:02,262 --> 00:02:07,821 ok. Ok, Andrea, so, erm, baby's arm 41 00:02:07,822 --> 00:02:10,342 has come out. That is normal? 42 00:02:11,462 --> 00:02:14,301 Take a wild guess. Baby is lying sideways. 43 00:02:14,302 --> 00:02:16,901 Do you understand that? Sideways? 44 00:02:16,902 --> 00:02:19,582 So you need a caesarean section. Oh, caesarean. 45 00:02:19,583 --> 00:02:22,182 I've got a scalpel in my back pocket. You'll be fine. 46 00:02:22,183 --> 00:02:23,542 Shall we go? 47 00:02:23,543 --> 00:02:25,783 Yeah. Yeah? That's it. 48 00:02:27,463 --> 00:02:29,542 That's it. You ok? 49 00:02:29,543 --> 00:02:32,982 Erm, Andrea, I know a short cut. Let's go this way. 50 00:02:32,983 --> 00:02:34,702 I don't want to hurry you, Andrea, 51 00:02:34,703 --> 00:02:37,182 but we've got to get going. You're doing brilliantly. 52 00:02:37,183 --> 00:02:39,422 - It's ok. Deep breaths. - Mind yourselves! 53 00:02:39,423 --> 00:02:41,502 Come on, then, quickly. Hurry up. 54 00:02:41,503 --> 00:02:44,182 She cries out that's it, we're nearly there. 55 00:02:44,183 --> 00:02:46,142 We're going to go up in the staff lift. 56 00:02:46,143 --> 00:02:47,384 Nearly there, nearly there. 57 00:02:48,704 --> 00:02:52,223 Come on. This is lift? It's safe. Come on. 58 00:02:52,224 --> 00:02:55,103 Really? Yeah. You can do it. I can't! 59 00:02:55,104 --> 00:02:56,703 No, wait. Wait, wait. 60 00:02:56,704 --> 00:02:59,223 Wait for it. No, no, no. Ok, are you ready? 61 00:02:59,224 --> 00:03:00,624 Three, two, one. 62 00:03:00,625 --> 00:03:02,023 She cries out 63 00:03:02,024 --> 00:03:04,543 keep breathing. Nice deep breaths. 64 00:03:04,544 --> 00:03:06,783 When I say so, we're going to jump out of the lift. 65 00:03:06,784 --> 00:03:08,183 Are you a real doctor? 66 00:03:08,184 --> 00:03:09,823 Fair question... 67 00:03:09,824 --> 00:03:11,983 Though, strangely, one you've asked me 68 00:03:11,984 --> 00:03:13,703 after you showed me your vagina. 69 00:03:13,704 --> 00:03:16,544 Right, there you go. Yes? 70 00:03:16,545 --> 00:03:18,704 Ok, so, let's get ready. 71 00:03:18,705 --> 00:03:20,744 Get ready. 72 00:03:20,745 --> 00:03:23,424 And jump! Don't worry, don't worry. 73 00:03:23,425 --> 00:03:26,145 The lift will go round and we'll have another go. 74 00:03:27,385 --> 00:03:29,984 You're doing really well. What's happening? 75 00:03:29,985 --> 00:03:31,624 It's just going through the... 76 00:03:31,625 --> 00:03:33,424 Through the roof bit before it goes down. 77 00:03:33,425 --> 00:03:34,464 Clanging 78 00:03:34,465 --> 00:03:36,384 all right? It'll be light again soon. 79 00:03:36,385 --> 00:03:38,545 Something's wrong! Look! Ok. 80 00:03:39,985 --> 00:03:42,224 Jesus Christ. We call this a cord prolapse. 81 00:03:42,225 --> 00:03:44,905 Ideally, it would happen on labour ward, not in a mad lift. 82 00:03:44,906 --> 00:03:47,505 Ok, Andrea, everything's going to be fine. 83 00:03:47,506 --> 00:03:49,025 I mean, it might be fine. 84 00:03:49,026 --> 00:03:51,545 If the cord gets cold, then baby stops getting blood. 85 00:03:51,546 --> 00:03:53,505 No more blood, no more baby. 86 00:03:53,506 --> 00:03:56,385 Right, hold it inside. You understand? Inside. 87 00:03:56,386 --> 00:03:58,065 Yeah. Come on, come on, come on. 88 00:03:58,066 --> 00:04:00,425 Are you the sho? Staff lifts now. 89 00:04:00,426 --> 00:04:02,305 Bring a hospital bed and a box of gloves. 90 00:04:02,306 --> 00:04:04,545 Literally now. Cord prolapse. 91 00:04:04,546 --> 00:04:05,706 She cries out 92 00:04:05,707 --> 00:04:06,865 right, come on, Andrea, 93 00:04:06,866 --> 00:04:08,345 we need to get off. Get ready. 94 00:04:08,346 --> 00:04:11,065 And jump! Jump! Jump! Can't! Fuck it. 95 00:04:11,066 --> 00:04:12,585 Come on. Ok? 96 00:04:12,586 --> 00:04:14,507 Andrea screams 97 00:04:15,587 --> 00:04:17,147 Andrea, stay there. 98 00:04:18,387 --> 00:04:20,786 Get her up on the bed. Knee-elbow position, 99 00:04:20,787 --> 00:04:22,586 replace the cord, get her round to theatre. 100 00:04:22,587 --> 00:04:24,786 I'm going to change into some scrubs. You consent her. 101 00:04:24,787 --> 00:04:27,426 Consent her for...? A deep-tissue massage. 102 00:04:27,427 --> 00:04:29,266 It's a cord prolapse! 103 00:04:29,267 --> 00:04:31,506 Caesarean! Oh, well, when you say, 104 00:04:31,507 --> 00:04:34,066 "knee-elbow position"... 105 00:04:34,067 --> 00:04:35,426 My mistake, sorry. 106 00:04:35,427 --> 00:04:37,506 Your outfit looks a lot like what the doctors wear. 107 00:04:37,507 --> 00:04:38,866 Andrea screams 108 00:04:38,867 --> 00:04:40,146 I'll do this. You push the bed. 109 00:04:40,147 --> 00:04:41,507 Get up on here. That's it. 110 00:04:44,828 --> 00:04:46,307 A bit less alton towers. 111 00:04:46,308 --> 00:04:47,947 I'm so sorry. 112 00:04:47,948 --> 00:04:49,547 Why don't I drive? 113 00:04:49,548 --> 00:04:51,027 You go and find the anaesthetist. 114 00:04:51,028 --> 00:04:53,067 That's the doctor that makes you go sleep-sleep. 115 00:04:53,068 --> 00:04:54,747 She groans 116 00:04:54,748 --> 00:04:56,067 I've found the husband. 117 00:04:56,068 --> 00:04:57,587 He's just coming up from reception. 118 00:04:57,588 --> 00:05:00,427 Ok, Andrea, this is going to be fine. You'll have a baby 119 00:05:00,428 --> 00:05:03,427 in five minutes. And is free? Yep, free. Completely free. 120 00:05:03,428 --> 00:05:05,107 We're not even allowed to accept tips. 121 00:05:05,108 --> 00:05:06,627 She gasps 122 00:05:06,628 --> 00:05:08,827 dr Adam, you should see me next. It's really urgent. 123 00:05:08,828 --> 00:05:11,267 Really? Erika, darling, can you just take a seat for me, please? 124 00:05:11,268 --> 00:05:14,828 Tracy! How was majorca? Did Mick like the hotel? 125 00:05:14,829 --> 00:05:16,508 Erika, just go back to triage. 126 00:05:16,509 --> 00:05:18,028 He speaks Romanian 127 00:05:18,029 --> 00:05:19,748 I did explain that the doctor would be 128 00:05:19,749 --> 00:05:21,909 - holding the cord inside. - He speaks Romanian. 129 00:05:21,910 --> 00:05:24,388 Probably didn't tell him I'd be wearing her like Kermit the frog. 130 00:05:24,389 --> 00:05:25,788 I don't understand. 131 00:05:25,789 --> 00:05:30,108 That's baby's heartbeat. Welcome to the nhs. 132 00:05:30,109 --> 00:05:32,508 Andrea cries out 133 00:05:32,509 --> 00:05:34,509 baby cries 134 00:05:39,389 --> 00:05:40,949 this is obs and gynae. 135 00:05:41,950 --> 00:05:43,470 Also known as brats and twats. 136 00:05:45,390 --> 00:05:47,630 You're generally sailing the ship alone... 137 00:05:48,670 --> 00:05:51,349 A ship that's massive and on fire and no-one's had 138 00:05:51,350 --> 00:05:52,990 the time to teach you how to sail. 139 00:05:54,350 --> 00:05:56,669 It's literally life or death here. 140 00:05:56,670 --> 00:05:59,869 And you're constantly being splashed by bodily fluids. 141 00:05:59,870 --> 00:06:01,710 Not even the fun kind. 142 00:06:05,070 --> 00:06:08,229 But what other doctors can say they end up with twice the number of 143 00:06:08,230 --> 00:06:10,350 patients they started with? 144 00:06:10,351 --> 00:06:12,311 Beat that, geriatrics. 145 00:06:14,791 --> 00:06:16,670 Clothes bill means I'm... 146 00:06:16,671 --> 00:06:18,911 Probably running my job at a loss, though. 147 00:06:31,831 --> 00:06:34,790 Ah, mr Lockhart. Having fun there? 148 00:06:34,791 --> 00:06:38,190 I was just... yeah, I'm not entirely convinced I want to know. 149 00:06:38,191 --> 00:06:40,271 I don't know if you heard, there was a massive 150 00:06:40,272 --> 00:06:41,871 cord prolapse before. 151 00:06:41,872 --> 00:06:44,631 Erm, crash section. Got the baby out in 90 seconds. 152 00:06:44,632 --> 00:06:47,231 I heard that you rocked up ten minutes late, 153 00:06:47,232 --> 00:06:49,791 nearly killed a patient in the maintenance lift, 154 00:06:49,792 --> 00:06:52,911 then did a caesarean section in casualwear. 155 00:06:52,912 --> 00:06:54,791 It was more that I took a short cut. 156 00:06:54,792 --> 00:06:57,271 Doctors aren't meant to take short cuts, Adam. 157 00:06:57,272 --> 00:06:59,391 Remember when I asked you to be an acting registrar? 158 00:06:59,392 --> 00:07:02,631 Can you try acting like a bloody registrar? 159 00:07:02,632 --> 00:07:05,191 I'll be in my office if you need me, 160 00:07:05,192 --> 00:07:07,272 which I strongly suggest you won't. 161 00:07:09,633 --> 00:07:10,833 You've missed a bit. 162 00:07:15,193 --> 00:07:18,153 Screaming 163 00:07:20,913 --> 00:07:22,913 mind out, please, mind out. 164 00:07:32,833 --> 00:07:36,232 It's really urgent! I know, petal, but I promise you 165 00:07:36,233 --> 00:07:37,953 the doctor won't be long. Pinkie promise? 166 00:07:37,954 --> 00:07:40,153 Pinkie promise with a little cherry on top. 167 00:07:40,154 --> 00:07:41,953 Oh! 168 00:07:41,954 --> 00:07:44,514 Why don't you head back to where you were sitting? 169 00:07:47,314 --> 00:07:50,113 Moany old trout. Morning, Ria. Morning, dr Kay. 170 00:07:50,114 --> 00:07:52,233 Oh, there he is! Ward round, trace? 171 00:07:52,234 --> 00:07:54,193 Can I ask you something personal, darling? 172 00:07:54,194 --> 00:07:56,033 Is it, "why do you look like shit this morning?" 173 00:07:56,034 --> 00:07:57,393 I wasn't going to ask it like that. 174 00:07:57,394 --> 00:07:58,793 I slept in my car last night. 175 00:07:58,794 --> 00:08:02,553 Well, it must be hard maintaining a relationship, 176 00:08:02,554 --> 00:08:04,353 what, with your job... 177 00:08:04,354 --> 00:08:06,874 And your personality. 178 00:08:06,875 --> 00:08:09,434 Tracy's the head midwife on today. 179 00:08:09,435 --> 00:08:11,595 I'd let her sew up my sister's perineum... 180 00:08:12,715 --> 00:08:14,474 Which sounds weird, now that I've said it, 181 00:08:14,475 --> 00:08:16,274 but it's actually the highest compliment I can give. 182 00:08:16,275 --> 00:08:18,754 Oh, remember to remove the thick, shiny layer on the outside. 183 00:08:18,755 --> 00:08:21,994 Ignore him. His girlfriend's come to her senses and dumped him. 184 00:08:21,995 --> 00:08:24,794 No-one's dumped anyone. But if you do want to smack him, 185 00:08:24,795 --> 00:08:26,594 I will turn a blind eye. 186 00:08:26,595 --> 00:08:28,754 Do you mind if we nip to room 8 first? 187 00:08:28,755 --> 00:08:31,234 She's making pretty slow progress. 188 00:08:31,235 --> 00:08:34,274 Pop downstairs and review mrs buckstar quickly. 189 00:08:34,275 --> 00:08:36,715 Doctors speak a lot of code, so it's "epididymo-orchitis" 190 00:08:36,716 --> 00:08:38,915 rather than "gammy cock and balls". 191 00:08:38,916 --> 00:08:40,795 "Review mrs buckstar," "go to Starbucks." 192 00:08:40,796 --> 00:08:42,235 Which ward is mrs buckstar in? 193 00:08:42,236 --> 00:08:44,715 He wants you to get him a fancy coffee without me knowing. 194 00:08:44,716 --> 00:08:47,276 Phone vibrating milk and one sugar for me, please. 195 00:08:54,636 --> 00:08:57,635 I'm in labour, mother, not quadriplegic. 196 00:08:57,636 --> 00:09:00,475 Hi. I'm Adam, one of the doctors. 197 00:09:00,476 --> 00:09:03,035 I'm afraid I've got some bad news. 198 00:09:03,036 --> 00:09:04,676 You've spelt 'pavilion' wrong. 199 00:09:08,317 --> 00:09:09,876 Would you like a sweetie, dear? 200 00:09:09,877 --> 00:09:12,076 The doctor's not going to give me better care 201 00:09:12,077 --> 00:09:15,517 because you offer him a Murray mint. In fairness, I might, actually. 202 00:09:19,277 --> 00:09:20,957 All right? 203 00:09:24,117 --> 00:09:26,276 You've got a little bit stuck at six centimetres, 204 00:09:26,277 --> 00:09:27,876 so I suggest we wang the dose up 205 00:09:27,877 --> 00:09:29,996 on the drip that's helping your contractions... 206 00:09:29,997 --> 00:09:31,756 Is "wang" a medical term? Sure is. 207 00:09:31,757 --> 00:09:33,917 And if that doesn't work, we'll, erm... 208 00:09:35,118 --> 00:09:39,797 Anna, let's put the synto onto 84 and re-examine in four hours. 209 00:09:39,798 --> 00:09:41,717 It won't be me, actually. I'll be home by then. 210 00:09:41,718 --> 00:09:43,677 Really? Well, I've been here 15 hours. 211 00:09:43,678 --> 00:09:46,797 If I stay any longer, they'll start charging me council tax. 212 00:09:46,798 --> 00:09:48,957 Right. Don't worry, darling, 213 00:09:48,958 --> 00:09:51,957 I'll do it, so at least it'll be a familiar face. 214 00:09:51,958 --> 00:09:53,957 Could you do the examination instead, doctor? 215 00:09:53,958 --> 00:09:57,197 It does make more sense for Tracy to do it. 216 00:09:57,198 --> 00:09:59,717 - Where did you train? - Would you like me to pop home 217 00:09:59,718 --> 00:10:01,237 and get my degree certificates? 218 00:10:01,238 --> 00:10:03,558 There's no way you could stay, is there? 219 00:10:03,559 --> 00:10:06,558 Erm, I'm not sure I like where this is going. 220 00:10:06,559 --> 00:10:08,158 You're not saying I can't choose who 221 00:10:08,159 --> 00:10:10,118 does intimate examinations on me, are you? 222 00:10:10,119 --> 00:10:12,678 I'm saying you won't be choosing based on the colour of their skin. 223 00:10:12,679 --> 00:10:16,878 Adam! What? When did anyone say anything about skin colour? 224 00:10:16,879 --> 00:10:18,398 It's called patient choice. 225 00:10:18,399 --> 00:10:20,838 It's important to have choice, like tonight I might... 226 00:10:20,839 --> 00:10:24,118 Choose to order a pizza rather than firebomb a mosque. 227 00:10:24,119 --> 00:10:25,798 I think what dr Kay meant to say... 228 00:10:25,799 --> 00:10:28,558 What I'm saying is, I know it's stressful being on labour ward, 229 00:10:28,559 --> 00:10:30,838 but anything more like this, and I will have to have you 230 00:10:30,839 --> 00:10:32,679 removed from the building. Is that understood? 231 00:10:32,680 --> 00:10:36,399 Ok. Ok, let's crack on, shall we? 232 00:10:36,400 --> 00:10:38,479 Wanker. 233 00:10:38,480 --> 00:10:40,239 That had better be a crossword answer. 234 00:10:40,240 --> 00:10:42,600 No, dear, she called you a wanker. 235 00:10:47,600 --> 00:10:49,759 What the hell was all that about? 236 00:10:49,760 --> 00:10:52,439 I guess white supremacists have babies, too. 237 00:10:52,440 --> 00:10:54,199 Not her. You. 238 00:10:54,200 --> 00:10:57,679 Me? I don't need a white knight to defend my honour. 239 00:10:57,680 --> 00:10:59,199 Hang on. I'm the registrar. 240 00:10:59,200 --> 00:11:00,799 Acting registrar. 241 00:11:00,800 --> 00:11:03,680 I'm the most senior doctor here. Until somebody more senior turns up. 242 00:11:03,681 --> 00:11:07,960 Well, I'm running this ward now, and it's up to me... no, I'm running 243 00:11:07,961 --> 00:11:10,120 this ward, young man, and I'm more than capable 244 00:11:10,121 --> 00:11:12,240 of handling myself, and the moment that I can't, 245 00:11:12,241 --> 00:11:13,880 I'll let somebody know, 246 00:11:13,881 --> 00:11:17,400 and I don't want to spoil the surprise - it won't be you. 247 00:11:17,401 --> 00:11:20,040 And don't tell the patients that you're kicking them out. 248 00:11:20,041 --> 00:11:22,320 This is the nhs, not your golf club. 249 00:11:22,321 --> 00:11:23,960 Which room are we kicking out? 250 00:11:23,961 --> 00:11:25,361 - Phone buzzes. - No, we're not kicking. 251 00:11:25,364 --> 00:11:27,320 Anybody out, benilda. They're all in labour, 252 00:11:27,321 --> 00:11:29,720 so we thought we might wait until they had their babies. 253 00:11:29,721 --> 00:11:31,321 Well, get a move on. 254 00:11:31,322 --> 00:11:33,281 The hospital's on red alert for beds. 255 00:11:33,282 --> 00:11:35,441 We're actually more than halfway to black alert. 256 00:11:35,442 --> 00:11:38,002 So, like, dusky-Merlot alert. 257 00:11:40,042 --> 00:11:42,281 Can you, er, go to gynae? 258 00:11:42,282 --> 00:11:44,001 The lady in bed 17's fit for home. 259 00:11:44,002 --> 00:11:46,601 I'm actually in the middle of a ward round. 260 00:11:46,602 --> 00:11:49,001 But, yeah, I mean, I'll find a moment. 261 00:11:49,002 --> 00:11:50,641 Before you do that, you'll need to 262 00:11:50,642 --> 00:11:52,641 fill out an incident form for room 8. Hang on, 263 00:11:52,642 --> 00:11:55,082 I didn't have to do one for the cord prolapse. 264 00:11:57,082 --> 00:11:59,522 Alarm blares. 265 00:12:05,723 --> 00:12:07,922 - Erika? - Third attendance this week 266 00:12:07,923 --> 00:12:10,443 - with non-specific symptoms. - Alarm stops. 267 00:12:10,446 --> 00:12:13,442 Ok, everybody, back to your jobs. We don't need the polyphonic spree. 268 00:12:13,443 --> 00:12:16,083 Shoo, shoo. Oh. Come on. 269 00:12:17,643 --> 00:12:19,922 Not you! 270 00:12:19,923 --> 00:12:22,043 Oh! Oh, god, I'm so sorry. 271 00:12:23,163 --> 00:12:26,282 Right, surprise me. What's the management? 272 00:12:26,283 --> 00:12:28,202 Right. Er... 273 00:12:28,203 --> 00:12:30,763 Ok, well, I would, erm... 274 00:12:30,764 --> 00:12:32,563 Check for a patent airway, 275 00:12:32,564 --> 00:12:34,203 er, then I would put her 276 00:12:34,204 --> 00:12:37,403 in the left lateral position, run high oxygen flow 277 00:12:37,404 --> 00:12:40,123 through a non-rebreather mask, erm, check for 278 00:12:40,124 --> 00:12:41,403 a pulse... 279 00:12:41,404 --> 00:12:43,644 So near and yet so shit. 280 00:12:45,244 --> 00:12:47,444 So, when people are really unconscious... 281 00:12:49,884 --> 00:12:51,924 Their hands smash into their faces. 282 00:12:55,324 --> 00:12:58,205 Phone buzzes. 283 00:13:00,845 --> 00:13:02,884 Adam? 284 00:13:02,885 --> 00:13:04,005 Adam! 285 00:13:05,485 --> 00:13:06,804 Adam? 286 00:13:06,805 --> 00:13:08,724 Do you think I'm rubbish? 287 00:13:08,725 --> 00:13:11,004 Look, I wasn't great on my first week, either. 288 00:13:11,005 --> 00:13:12,965 I've been here two months! 289 00:13:16,125 --> 00:13:18,284 Two months? Well, I just haven't had a chance 290 00:13:18,285 --> 00:13:20,444 to do much hands-on stuff yet. 291 00:13:20,445 --> 00:13:22,084 How many babies have you delivered? 292 00:13:22,085 --> 00:13:23,604 Erm... 293 00:13:23,605 --> 00:13:25,564 No babies have needed delivery in two months? 294 00:13:25,565 --> 00:13:27,565 Everyone's always too busy to teach me. 295 00:13:27,566 --> 00:13:29,325 You just need to be less of a wallflower. 296 00:13:29,326 --> 00:13:30,886 It's dog eat dog in this place. 297 00:13:31,966 --> 00:13:33,206 And... 298 00:13:34,206 --> 00:13:35,606 The dogs eat wallflowers. 299 00:13:37,646 --> 00:13:40,245 Sorry, sorry, sorry. I've been elbow-deep in a patient, 300 00:13:40,246 --> 00:13:43,645 I've had an ethnostate in room 8 and someone else playing dead. 301 00:13:43,646 --> 00:13:45,805 Oh, and I've got blood matted into my pubes. 302 00:13:45,806 --> 00:13:47,445 I love it when you talk dirty. 303 00:13:47,446 --> 00:13:49,045 Right, so, who did you say you were? 304 00:13:49,046 --> 00:13:50,725 My name's Harry. 305 00:13:50,726 --> 00:13:52,605 When you called my mother. 306 00:13:52,606 --> 00:13:54,406 I said I was your fuck buddy. 307 00:13:56,607 --> 00:13:57,966 I said I was your flatmate. 308 00:13:57,967 --> 00:13:59,846 But she knows we've only got one bedroom. 309 00:13:59,847 --> 00:14:02,286 Wild idea, but you know you could just... Tell her about us? 310 00:14:02,287 --> 00:14:04,566 You don't know her. She'll turn you into stone, or something. 311 00:14:04,567 --> 00:14:07,366 Nah. Mums love me. It's like my superpower. 312 00:14:07,367 --> 00:14:09,206 How are we going to fake our own deaths, 313 00:14:09,207 --> 00:14:10,606 then, before Greg's stag do? 314 00:14:10,607 --> 00:14:12,486 I'm thinking avalanche, helicopter crash... 315 00:14:12,487 --> 00:14:15,086 Ah, it'll be a laugh. Carbon-monoxide poisoning? 316 00:14:15,087 --> 00:14:17,087 - Pager beeps. - Shouldn't you pop along, 317 00:14:17,088 --> 00:14:19,486 Seeing as you're the best man? Crap. I was meant to go to gynae. 318 00:14:19,487 --> 00:14:21,366 Sorry, call you later. Don't apologise. 319 00:14:21,367 --> 00:14:23,006 That's the longest call we've had in months. 320 00:14:23,007 --> 00:14:24,647 I was starting to get bored. 321 00:14:27,408 --> 00:14:29,247 ♪ No-no, no, no 322 00:14:29,248 --> 00:14:30,967 ♪ no-no-no, no, no-no, no 323 00:14:30,968 --> 00:14:32,567 ♪ no, no-no 324 00:14:32,568 --> 00:14:34,167 ♪ no, no, no-no 325 00:14:34,168 --> 00:14:35,607 ♪ no-no, no, no 326 00:14:35,608 --> 00:14:37,127 ♪ no-no, no, no 327 00:14:37,128 --> 00:14:39,007 ♪ no-no, no, no-no, no 328 00:14:39,008 --> 00:14:41,487 ♪ nobody can do the ♪ shing-a-ling... ♪ 329 00:14:41,488 --> 00:14:42,887 Erm, good news, mrs w. 330 00:14:42,888 --> 00:14:45,088 You are finally free to go home. 331 00:14:47,568 --> 00:14:49,608 Are you stupid? 332 00:14:50,928 --> 00:14:53,527 I was told you were good to go, but, yeah, you don't look great. 333 00:14:53,528 --> 00:14:55,088 Speak for yourself. 334 00:14:55,089 --> 00:14:56,488 Pager beeps 335 00:14:56,489 --> 00:14:58,968 erm, must have been a bit of a mix-up. 336 00:14:58,969 --> 00:15:01,608 I'll come back later. I need to see someone else now. 337 00:15:01,609 --> 00:15:03,209 Hopefully a hairdresser. 338 00:15:04,409 --> 00:15:06,048 ♪ Skate ♪ like I do 339 00:15:06,049 --> 00:15:08,448 ♪ nobody can do ♪ boogaloo 340 00:15:08,449 --> 00:15:09,488 ♪ like I do 341 00:15:09,489 --> 00:15:10,968 ♪ nobody can do ♪ Philly 342 00:15:10,969 --> 00:15:12,488 ♪ like I do 343 00:15:12,489 --> 00:15:15,928 ♪ well, don't you know I'm gonna skate right through... ♪ 344 00:15:15,929 --> 00:15:17,488 Dr Kay, you're needed in room 4. 345 00:15:17,489 --> 00:15:18,889 Yes, I know... 346 00:15:19,929 --> 00:15:21,648 ♪ when I go to Philly, I do 347 00:15:21,649 --> 00:15:23,809 ♪ ain't nobody doin' it but me, babe 348 00:15:23,810 --> 00:15:25,209 ♪ nobody but me 349 00:15:25,210 --> 00:15:27,049 ♪ well, let me tell you, nobody 350 00:15:27,050 --> 00:15:28,409 groaning 351 00:15:28,410 --> 00:15:31,369 ♪ but nobody but me 352 00:15:31,370 --> 00:15:32,969 ♪ let me tell you, nobody 353 00:15:32,970 --> 00:15:35,929 ♪ nobody nobody... 354 00:15:35,930 --> 00:15:39,009 Never actually let the patient see the forceps. 355 00:15:39,010 --> 00:15:41,769 The only people happy with two-foot-long metal salad tongs 356 00:15:41,770 --> 00:15:43,969 inserted in their vaginas are people who aren't aware 357 00:15:43,970 --> 00:15:46,049 that there are two-foot-long metal salad tongs 358 00:15:46,050 --> 00:15:47,289 inserted in their vaginas. 359 00:15:47,290 --> 00:15:51,049 It's only a few more minutes. Shut up, Graham! 360 00:15:51,050 --> 00:15:53,170 And put your shirt back on. Just breathe. 361 00:15:53,171 --> 00:15:55,171 - That's what's important. - She groans. 362 00:15:55,174 --> 00:15:57,250 You're doing so good. 363 00:15:57,251 --> 00:15:59,570 You're doing so well. 364 00:15:59,571 --> 00:16:01,810 You're doing so well, my little soldier! 365 00:16:01,811 --> 00:16:04,731 Shut up, Graham. I'm going to play the song now. 366 00:16:06,051 --> 00:16:07,591 Gentle music plays 367 00:16:07,592 --> 00:16:09,130 seen one before? Yes... 368 00:16:09,131 --> 00:16:10,970 See one, do one, teach one. 369 00:16:10,971 --> 00:16:12,530 I don't like this song. 370 00:16:12,531 --> 00:16:13,931 Change the song, change the song. 371 00:16:15,851 --> 00:16:17,850 Wait for a contraction. 372 00:16:17,851 --> 00:16:19,130 And pull. 373 00:16:19,131 --> 00:16:20,730 You got to keep breathing. 374 00:16:20,731 --> 00:16:22,051 Patient cries out 375 00:16:22,052 --> 00:16:24,291 just find your centre, baby. 376 00:16:24,292 --> 00:16:25,651 No stress. Graham... 377 00:16:25,652 --> 00:16:28,051 Phone buzzes 378 00:16:28,052 --> 00:16:30,571 dr Kay speaking. It's Greg. You've not answered 379 00:16:30,572 --> 00:16:32,811 any emails in four days. No-one even knows where we're meeting. 380 00:16:32,812 --> 00:16:36,211 Push, push, push, push, push! Pull as hard as you can! Now! 381 00:16:36,212 --> 00:16:37,931 Oh, god, tell me you're not having sex. 382 00:16:37,932 --> 00:16:40,331 Just on labour ward right now. I know it's traditional 383 00:16:40,332 --> 00:16:42,651 for the best man to humiliate the groom on his stag do, 384 00:16:42,652 --> 00:16:45,611 and traditionally that involves handcuffs and a sex worker... 385 00:16:45,612 --> 00:16:47,171 Just put some oomph into it. 386 00:16:47,172 --> 00:16:49,451 Welly's threatening to take over and drag us all to a strip club. 387 00:16:49,452 --> 00:16:51,332 No, no, no, we won't be going to... Breast clinic. 388 00:16:51,333 --> 00:16:53,292 If this doesn't work, will we have to do a caesarean? 389 00:16:53,293 --> 00:16:56,892 It will work. Erm, look, it's all going to be civilised, don't worry. 390 00:16:56,893 --> 00:16:59,372 You say, "don't worry," but you'll understand why I am still worried. 391 00:16:59,373 --> 00:17:01,892 Tell everyone 8 o'clock upstairs at the crown. 392 00:17:01,893 --> 00:17:04,252 I'll see you later. I really need to get back to this vagina. 393 00:17:04,253 --> 00:17:06,572 Yeah, well, you're definitely not having sex, then. 394 00:17:06,573 --> 00:17:08,372 You got to stay breathing, ok? 395 00:17:08,373 --> 00:17:10,252 That's it, that's it. You're doing brilliantly. 396 00:17:10,253 --> 00:17:11,972 Thanks. I was talking to the patient. 397 00:17:11,973 --> 00:17:14,932 Nice and slowly, nice and slowly. Don't let her tear. 398 00:17:14,933 --> 00:17:17,732 You're so beautiful! Graham, just stop. 399 00:17:17,733 --> 00:17:19,092 Nice and slowly, nice and... 400 00:17:19,093 --> 00:17:22,493 Dad, do you want to come down and see baby being born? 401 00:17:22,494 --> 00:17:25,614 Oh, my god, where's its face?! What's the matter with his face?! 402 00:17:26,654 --> 00:17:27,773 Patient screams 403 00:17:27,774 --> 00:17:28,834 baby cries 404 00:17:28,835 --> 00:17:29,893 his face is fine. 405 00:17:29,894 --> 00:17:31,853 Just on the front of his head, not the back. 406 00:17:31,854 --> 00:17:34,134 Remember I said, "don't let her tear"? 407 00:17:48,334 --> 00:17:49,795 Adam's a good name. 408 00:17:49,796 --> 00:17:51,255 He chuckles 409 00:17:54,815 --> 00:17:56,734 you've got a bit of a tear going into the back passage. 410 00:17:56,735 --> 00:17:58,614 We'll get you round to theatre, 411 00:17:58,615 --> 00:18:01,374 and have that repaired nicely for you. 412 00:18:01,375 --> 00:18:03,375 Won't take more than an hour or so. 413 00:18:28,576 --> 00:18:30,016 He clears throat. 414 00:18:38,456 --> 00:18:40,136 She sniffs. 415 00:18:43,616 --> 00:18:46,255 Adam, I'm so sorry. I wish I could've sewn it up myself. 416 00:18:46,256 --> 00:18:48,336 I've just never actually done it... It's fine. 417 00:18:48,337 --> 00:18:50,376 Besides, my genitals were wondering why 418 00:18:50,377 --> 00:18:52,417 they hadn't been covered in blood for a few hours. 419 00:18:58,457 --> 00:19:00,216 Better do an incident form. 420 00:19:00,217 --> 00:19:02,096 How are we doing here, then? 421 00:19:02,097 --> 00:19:03,616 All under control, mr Lockhart. 422 00:19:03,617 --> 00:19:05,376 Miracles never cease. Could you just have... 423 00:19:05,377 --> 00:19:07,536 I thought I told you to discharge that gynae patient. 424 00:19:07,537 --> 00:19:08,936 I see the miracles have ceased. 425 00:19:08,937 --> 00:19:10,296 No. But she's not even... 426 00:19:10,297 --> 00:19:12,936 Are my team causing you trouble, ms mendoza? 427 00:19:12,937 --> 00:19:14,416 We're full on labour ward. 428 00:19:14,417 --> 00:19:17,097 Post-nates, ante-nates, gynae. I don't know how we're supposed 429 00:19:17,098 --> 00:19:18,817 to admit anyone from a&e. 430 00:19:18,818 --> 00:19:21,657 We've been on red alert all day, and we're practically at black alert. 431 00:19:21,658 --> 00:19:23,218 Burgundy alert, then. 432 00:19:23,219 --> 00:19:24,777 All laugh 433 00:19:24,778 --> 00:19:26,977 I'm sure we can do something about that for you. 434 00:19:26,978 --> 00:19:29,297 Can't we, dr Kay? Yeah, we could pull out 435 00:19:29,298 --> 00:19:31,537 the patient's drips, and Chuck her out the window. 436 00:19:31,538 --> 00:19:33,097 I knew you'd think of something. 437 00:19:33,098 --> 00:19:35,537 Leave it with us. Can I help at all? 438 00:19:35,538 --> 00:19:37,537 You could pop down to the coffee shop. 439 00:19:37,538 --> 00:19:39,297 There's a vacancy for a barista. 440 00:19:39,298 --> 00:19:42,697 Shruti did her first forcep delivery earlier. 441 00:19:42,698 --> 00:19:44,097 Er, yeah, yeah. 442 00:19:44,098 --> 00:19:46,418 She had been in second stage for over an hour, and we... 443 00:19:46,419 --> 00:19:48,619 Very good. Walk with me, Adam. 444 00:19:50,939 --> 00:19:52,498 Quick story for you. 445 00:19:52,499 --> 00:19:54,618 So, there's this acting obstetric registrar, 446 00:19:54,619 --> 00:19:59,418 and he walks into a room and he calls his patient a Nazi. 447 00:19:59,419 --> 00:20:01,578 Oh, you're making it so much worse than it was. 448 00:20:01,579 --> 00:20:03,898 She was being racist to Tracy... Every mother and baby 449 00:20:03,899 --> 00:20:06,418 on this ward is relying on your good decisions, 450 00:20:06,419 --> 00:20:09,338 and your good judgment. Apologise to Tracy, 451 00:20:09,339 --> 00:20:11,098 apologise to the patient, 452 00:20:11,099 --> 00:20:12,819 and send some people home. 453 00:20:14,699 --> 00:20:16,019 Oh, and, Adam? 454 00:20:16,020 --> 00:20:17,899 Stop being shit. 455 00:20:17,900 --> 00:20:19,699 ♪ You hit me once I hit you back 456 00:20:19,700 --> 00:20:21,139 pager beeps 457 00:20:21,140 --> 00:20:22,819 ♪ you gave a kick I gave a slap 458 00:20:22,820 --> 00:20:26,780 ♪ you smashed a plate over my head then I set fire to our bed 459 00:20:29,260 --> 00:20:32,539 ♪ you hit me once I hit you back... ♪ 460 00:20:32,540 --> 00:20:34,259 Rachel glover? 461 00:20:34,260 --> 00:20:35,660 Kerry Salisbury? 462 00:20:37,300 --> 00:20:38,900 Caroline morobeto? 463 00:20:42,220 --> 00:20:44,940 ♪ Oh, my black eye casts no shadow 464 00:20:44,941 --> 00:20:47,460 ♪ your red eye sees no blame 465 00:20:47,461 --> 00:20:49,780 ♪ your slaps don't stick your kicks don't hit 466 00:20:49,781 --> 00:20:51,580 ♪ so we remain the same 467 00:20:51,581 --> 00:20:53,780 ♪ blood sticks, sweat drips 468 00:20:53,781 --> 00:20:55,980 ♪ break the lock if it don't fit 469 00:20:55,981 --> 00:20:58,180 ♪ a kick in the teeth is good for some 470 00:20:58,181 --> 00:21:00,381 ♪ a kiss with a fist is better than none 471 00:21:02,261 --> 00:21:04,340 ♪ whoa 472 00:21:04,341 --> 00:21:07,461 ♪ a kiss with a fist is better than none. ♪ 473 00:21:10,581 --> 00:21:14,341 So, you've recovered from earlier. 474 00:21:14,342 --> 00:21:16,621 Oh, yes. Oh, god, sorry, dr Adam. 475 00:21:16,622 --> 00:21:17,981 I don't know what came over me. 476 00:21:17,982 --> 00:21:19,901 So, remind me, how many weeks are you? 477 00:21:19,902 --> 00:21:22,221 Oh, god, I hate maths. 478 00:21:22,222 --> 00:21:25,621 I couldn't even tell you in months. Er... 479 00:21:25,622 --> 00:21:27,381 Erm, ok, let's think. 480 00:21:27,382 --> 00:21:30,341 So... birthday's in June. 481 00:21:30,342 --> 00:21:31,462 I'll be 27... 482 00:21:33,462 --> 00:21:36,102 Well, it's got to be, like, 2,000 weeks? 483 00:21:37,462 --> 00:21:39,142 You're 25 weeks. 484 00:21:40,502 --> 00:21:42,342 Oh! 485 00:21:42,343 --> 00:21:43,742 You mean the baby. 486 00:21:43,743 --> 00:21:46,262 She laughs 487 00:21:46,263 --> 00:21:50,022 so, erm, what's the... Problem? 488 00:21:50,023 --> 00:21:54,262 Well, I woke up this morning with a headache, 489 00:21:54,263 --> 00:21:58,302 and my tongue is just, like, totally covered in spots. 490 00:21:58,303 --> 00:22:00,103 Right. Let's have a look. 491 00:22:04,423 --> 00:22:06,143 Ok. 492 00:22:08,783 --> 00:22:12,583 I'm afraid that what you have is known as... 493 00:22:12,584 --> 00:22:14,384 Taste buds. 494 00:22:16,824 --> 00:22:18,084 Oh. 495 00:22:18,085 --> 00:22:19,344 She laughs 496 00:22:22,304 --> 00:22:24,543 so, is there someone at home we can call 497 00:22:24,544 --> 00:22:26,303 to come and collect you, 498 00:22:26,304 --> 00:22:28,383 or do you live here now? 499 00:22:28,384 --> 00:22:30,864 Oh, god, no, who'd want to live with me? 500 00:22:32,984 --> 00:22:34,903 Pager beeps 501 00:22:34,904 --> 00:22:36,424 right. 502 00:22:41,425 --> 00:22:44,384 Adam, that lady you just saw, her blood pressure's a bit high. 503 00:22:44,385 --> 00:22:47,024 Do you want me to send her for some bloods? Just send her home. 504 00:22:47,025 --> 00:22:50,225 No, wait. Erm, yes, do the bloods. 505 00:22:51,625 --> 00:22:53,185 Yep? 506 00:22:54,545 --> 00:22:56,225 What's the trace like? 507 00:22:58,705 --> 00:23:00,945 Isn't the evening registrar here yet? 508 00:23:03,505 --> 00:23:05,664 Ok. Fine. 509 00:23:05,665 --> 00:23:07,904 Right, we're doing a caesarean for room 8. 510 00:23:07,905 --> 00:23:10,745 Dr Adam? Dr Adam, sorry, sorry, I meant to say. 511 00:23:10,746 --> 00:23:13,065 My teeth have become a bit itchy. 512 00:23:13,066 --> 00:23:14,546 Send her home. 513 00:23:15,626 --> 00:23:17,705 Don't ask to do it. I'm tired. 514 00:23:17,706 --> 00:23:19,305 I need to be gone ten minutes ago. 515 00:23:19,306 --> 00:23:20,945 Erm, so, we're all good to go. 516 00:23:20,946 --> 00:23:22,505 We'll have baby out in five minutes, 517 00:23:22,506 --> 00:23:26,025 and may I just say, I misspoke before 518 00:23:26,026 --> 00:23:29,225 and I'm very sorry. All water under the bridge. 519 00:23:29,226 --> 00:23:31,225 But just checking it will be you doing this operation 520 00:23:31,226 --> 00:23:33,066 and nobody else. 521 00:23:34,986 --> 00:23:36,705 Yes. 522 00:23:36,706 --> 00:23:38,346 Yes, it will. Yeah. 523 00:23:44,027 --> 00:23:47,386 Actually, fuck it. You've got to learn some time. You're up. 524 00:23:47,387 --> 00:23:49,266 Come on, you've seen one. Y-Yeah... 525 00:23:49,267 --> 00:23:52,066 So you know the routine. See one, fuck one up, teach one. 526 00:23:52,067 --> 00:23:54,866 Really? Thank you. 527 00:23:54,867 --> 00:23:57,467 Are you sure? Not especially. Come on. 528 00:24:05,787 --> 00:24:07,307 Are you happy? 529 00:24:09,668 --> 00:24:11,228 Right, come on. 530 00:24:13,428 --> 00:24:15,467 This it? Yeah. Hurry up, please, 531 00:24:15,468 --> 00:24:17,908 I think the anaesthetist's retiring next week. 532 00:24:22,748 --> 00:24:24,547 Adam? Mm? 533 00:24:24,548 --> 00:24:27,027 Stretch it. Come on. Harder than that. 534 00:24:27,028 --> 00:24:28,908 Right, through the peritoneum, then. 535 00:24:30,948 --> 00:24:33,547 Pop your finger in. You're not going to damage anything. 536 00:24:33,548 --> 00:24:35,707 Ok. 537 00:24:35,708 --> 00:24:37,149 Oh! 538 00:24:40,669 --> 00:24:43,108 Adam? Adam? 539 00:24:43,109 --> 00:24:45,788 Er, yeah, ok, good. Great. So, you're going to make 540 00:24:45,789 --> 00:24:48,348 a u-shape in the lower segment of the uterus, 541 00:24:48,349 --> 00:24:50,348 and then you're going to extend it with your fingers. 542 00:24:50,349 --> 00:24:51,948 What if there isn't a lower segment? 543 00:24:51,949 --> 00:24:54,188 You know, like if it's before 32 weeks. 544 00:24:54,189 --> 00:24:56,388 Yeah, we usually save the q&a session for afterwards. 545 00:24:56,389 --> 00:24:59,068 It would just be a horrible, bloody mess. Come on, get on with it. 546 00:24:59,069 --> 00:25:00,948 Is that...? Good. 547 00:25:00,949 --> 00:25:02,468 Now what? 548 00:25:02,469 --> 00:25:04,668 I think even you can guess what happens next. Come on. 549 00:25:04,669 --> 00:25:06,349 That's it. 550 00:25:06,350 --> 00:25:08,390 Just guide the head out. It's coming. 551 00:25:09,910 --> 00:25:11,390 Ok. 552 00:25:12,950 --> 00:25:14,350 That's it. 553 00:25:16,070 --> 00:25:18,789 One baby coming up... 554 00:25:18,790 --> 00:25:20,430 Baby cries 555 00:25:23,830 --> 00:25:26,069 no, get her off me. I'm not having a paki 556 00:25:26,070 --> 00:25:28,149 delivering my baby! Get her off me! 557 00:25:28,150 --> 00:25:31,629 Stop touching it! You promised that you would do it! 558 00:25:31,630 --> 00:25:34,269 Excuse me, get me out of this! Take this! 559 00:25:34,270 --> 00:25:35,990 What is this? Get this off me! 560 00:25:35,991 --> 00:25:38,311 Adolf's a good name. Mum, will you do something?! 561 00:25:40,631 --> 00:25:42,071 You did really well. 562 00:25:43,351 --> 00:25:45,671 One caesarean down, 8,000 to go. 563 00:25:46,871 --> 00:25:49,470 To be fair, they don't normally end like that. 564 00:25:49,471 --> 00:25:52,791 Erm, write up the notes and mention that I closed the skin. 565 00:25:56,271 --> 00:25:58,831 Oh, gosh, isn't he wonderful? 566 00:26:12,192 --> 00:26:13,832 Oh, for... 567 00:26:16,392 --> 00:26:18,472 Phone rings 568 00:26:19,792 --> 00:26:21,271 cancellations hotline. 569 00:26:21,272 --> 00:26:23,871 Press 1 for you need to stay at work, leaving me to make 570 00:26:23,872 --> 00:26:28,031 small talk with 20 public-school dickheads I barely know. 571 00:26:28,032 --> 00:26:31,151 That's unfair. There's only 15 of them. 572 00:26:31,152 --> 00:26:32,591 And I'm just leaving now. 573 00:26:32,592 --> 00:26:35,872 No way! Can you bring a change of clothes, please? 574 00:26:35,873 --> 00:26:38,312 Yeah. Anything in particular? 575 00:26:38,313 --> 00:26:39,512 Erm, something smart-casual 576 00:26:39,513 --> 00:26:42,312 and not totally encrusted with a stranger's blood? 577 00:26:42,313 --> 00:26:44,312 Hula skirt and feather boa it is, then. 578 00:26:44,313 --> 00:26:46,193 - He chuckles. - See you in a bit. 579 00:26:50,153 --> 00:26:52,032 You can't help being ill, darling. 580 00:26:52,033 --> 00:26:54,392 I'll just get somebody else to pick her up. 581 00:26:54,393 --> 00:26:57,472 Right. Bye-bye. 582 00:26:57,473 --> 00:26:59,312 Er, Adam? 583 00:26:59,313 --> 00:27:01,272 I saw what you did to that dolphin. 584 00:27:01,273 --> 00:27:03,353 A gentleman never discusses a lady's blowhole. 585 00:27:03,354 --> 00:27:05,673 Do you want my advice, Adam? Erm, not really. 586 00:27:05,674 --> 00:27:07,313 That is exactly your problem. 587 00:27:07,314 --> 00:27:09,274 It was pretty funny, though, right? 588 00:27:24,594 --> 00:27:30,513 ♪ Prophet six-zero-zero-nine-one 589 00:27:30,514 --> 00:27:33,594 ♪ this is the flight number 590 00:27:33,595 --> 00:27:36,595 ♪ of our galactic sun 591 00:27:38,595 --> 00:27:43,555 ♪ prophet six-zero-zero-nine-one 592 00:27:44,915 --> 00:27:46,274 ♪ before we start 593 00:27:46,275 --> 00:27:51,234 ♪ you should know that you're not the only one 594 00:27:51,235 --> 00:27:52,675 ♪ who can hurt me... ♪ 595 00:28:02,956 --> 00:28:04,596 Engine starts. 596 00:28:11,076 --> 00:28:12,795 It's my second-favourite doctor! 597 00:28:12,796 --> 00:28:14,035 Who's number one? 598 00:28:14,036 --> 00:28:15,556 David tennant. First series. 599 00:28:19,156 --> 00:28:21,715 How was work? Fine, thanks. Who are they? 600 00:28:21,716 --> 00:28:24,075 No idea, but they're better craic than your mates upstairs. 601 00:28:24,076 --> 00:28:25,395 Oh, come on. 602 00:28:25,396 --> 00:28:27,555 I'm sure you'll find something in common with them. 603 00:28:27,556 --> 00:28:30,236 There you go. See? Wearing the same t-shirt. 604 00:28:30,237 --> 00:28:32,636 Some guy called... Welly brought them. 605 00:28:32,637 --> 00:28:35,237 Well, they're not too terrible, considering. 606 00:28:38,797 --> 00:28:40,917 Shall we just do this? Come on. 607 00:28:42,237 --> 00:28:44,677 Shouting and cheering 608 00:28:47,957 --> 00:28:50,676 ah! 7:58. There you go. 609 00:28:50,677 --> 00:28:53,916 I knew you wouldn't let me down. 610 00:28:53,917 --> 00:28:57,636 No, you didn't. Yeah, fine. May have lost a small bet. 611 00:28:57,637 --> 00:29:00,037 Nightmare! This place doesn't do jagerbombs! 612 00:29:00,038 --> 00:29:01,397 Whatever will we do? 613 00:29:01,398 --> 00:29:04,638 Adster! Welly. Don't do that. 614 00:29:06,078 --> 00:29:09,757 Where's your t-shirt? Yeah, adster, where's your t-shirt? 615 00:29:09,758 --> 00:29:11,398 Put it on. 616 00:29:13,198 --> 00:29:14,917 Put it on. 617 00:29:14,918 --> 00:29:21,677 Put it on, put it on, put it on, put it on! 618 00:29:21,678 --> 00:29:24,197 Yes! And as for you... 619 00:29:24,198 --> 00:29:26,557 One pint of gin. 620 00:29:26,558 --> 00:29:27,957 No, I'm not going to drink that. 621 00:29:27,958 --> 00:29:30,198 Well, you will be, because it's tradi-ti-on. How can it be 622 00:29:30,199 --> 00:29:31,918 a tradition? I've never got married before. 623 00:29:31,919 --> 00:29:34,558 Right, I need a drink. Is this my stuff? 624 00:29:34,559 --> 00:29:36,998 So, did your mum call? She left a voicemail. 625 00:29:36,999 --> 00:29:38,998 Ah. And you didn't listen. 626 00:29:38,999 --> 00:29:41,999 No. I'm changing my number and moving to Venezuela. 627 00:29:43,679 --> 00:29:45,038 You done there? 628 00:29:45,039 --> 00:29:46,558 Both laugh 629 00:29:46,559 --> 00:29:48,398 right, come on, what do you want? 630 00:29:48,399 --> 00:29:52,118 I think 12 litres of vodka red bull should probably do it. 631 00:29:52,119 --> 00:29:54,678 Er, can I get a bottle of sauvignon blanc and... 632 00:29:54,679 --> 00:29:56,318 Phone buzzes 633 00:29:56,319 --> 00:29:59,039 a rum and coke, please? This'll be jakesy. 634 00:29:59,040 --> 00:30:01,039 He's probably gone to Poland by mistake. Hello? 635 00:30:01,040 --> 00:30:03,879 Kay. Mr Lockhart! I'm just in a... 636 00:30:03,880 --> 00:30:05,519 Pint of gin, pint of gin! 637 00:30:05,520 --> 00:30:07,239 Supermarket. 638 00:30:07,240 --> 00:30:09,519 Sorry, mr Lockhart, how can I help? 639 00:30:09,520 --> 00:30:12,359 Er, listen, the locum registrar 640 00:30:12,360 --> 00:30:14,840 hasn't turned up for the night shift. 641 00:30:15,920 --> 00:30:18,199 Erm... who's the senior reg? 642 00:30:18,200 --> 00:30:21,160 Er, I don't think he'd get here from Sydney in time. 643 00:30:22,280 --> 00:30:25,039 Well, do say if you've got something more important on. 644 00:30:25,040 --> 00:30:27,680 Erm, no. No, no, no. Erm... 645 00:30:27,681 --> 00:30:29,240 No, I can do it. 646 00:30:29,241 --> 00:30:31,001 Will the missus understand? 647 00:30:35,161 --> 00:30:37,680 She'll be fine with it. Good man. Bye! 648 00:30:37,681 --> 00:30:39,321 Lockhart hangs up. 649 00:30:44,681 --> 00:30:47,160 How long are you going to be? A couple of hours? 650 00:30:47,161 --> 00:30:49,961 12. I'm so sorry. And there's no-one else who could...? 651 00:30:52,521 --> 00:30:55,041 I'm sorry. It's really crap for you. 652 00:30:58,522 --> 00:31:02,281 You don't have to stay here, obviously. I'll be grand. 653 00:31:02,282 --> 00:31:04,242 I've never had a... Pint of gin before. 654 00:31:06,402 --> 00:31:08,841 Just a couple more years, then I'll be a consultant, 655 00:31:08,842 --> 00:31:11,241 and it'll just be me, you and an Aston Martin. 656 00:31:11,242 --> 00:31:14,401 It would be nice to live somewhere a bit more spacious. 657 00:31:14,402 --> 00:31:16,401 We can shower in the glove compartment. 658 00:31:16,402 --> 00:31:18,282 Right, go on. You've got some babies to deliver. 659 00:31:21,122 --> 00:31:23,721 You should have gone along with my avalanche idea. 660 00:31:23,722 --> 00:31:26,482 Ok, your first best-manly duty is to rescue my dad. 661 00:31:26,483 --> 00:31:29,402 Welly's trying to get him to drink a shoe full of Sambuca. 662 00:31:29,403 --> 00:31:31,363 Shoe-ca! Shoe-ca! 663 00:31:33,443 --> 00:31:36,122 You're going to hate me. 664 00:31:36,123 --> 00:31:38,802 There's a... Staffing emergency at the hospital. 665 00:31:38,803 --> 00:31:40,482 There's no doctors on labour ward. 666 00:31:40,483 --> 00:31:44,443 No. So I have to go back in. Drink this. Then you can't go in. 667 00:31:46,163 --> 00:31:49,122 I can't. Ok, give me one good reason. 668 00:31:49,123 --> 00:31:50,562 Er... 669 00:31:50,563 --> 00:31:53,603 Er, because I, erm... Because you'd rather be at work. 670 00:31:54,764 --> 00:31:56,484 Yeah, have a good night, mate. 671 00:32:04,484 --> 00:32:06,164 Fuck's sake! 672 00:32:50,565 --> 00:32:53,045 Do you want the good news or the bad news? 673 00:32:53,046 --> 00:32:55,485 Erm, the good. Oh, I was worried you'd say that. 674 00:32:55,486 --> 00:32:57,285 It's all bad, I'm afraid. 675 00:32:57,286 --> 00:32:59,045 The wards are stuffed to the gills, 676 00:32:59,046 --> 00:33:02,685 there's no sho, and the midwife in charge is Tracy. 677 00:33:02,686 --> 00:33:04,845 Well, she was working during the day. The other one. 678 00:33:04,846 --> 00:33:08,045 "Non-reassuring trace." 679 00:33:08,046 --> 00:33:09,845 Right, I'm off home. But call me whenever. 680 00:33:09,846 --> 00:33:11,726 I won't. Good man. 681 00:33:13,606 --> 00:33:16,245 You're very intent on showing me your penis today. 682 00:33:16,246 --> 00:33:18,285 They need to increase the credits 683 00:33:18,286 --> 00:33:20,525 on the scrub machine. You can practically tell 684 00:33:20,526 --> 00:33:23,087 who did your circumcision. Made a right meal of it. 685 00:33:27,567 --> 00:33:29,327 Keep going. 686 00:33:35,487 --> 00:33:38,366 Hi, trace. How can I help? Oh, doctor, thank god you're here. 687 00:33:38,367 --> 00:33:40,366 Can you see room 11 for me? 688 00:33:40,367 --> 00:33:42,846 I'm desperately worried about her. 689 00:33:42,847 --> 00:33:45,246 Quick as you can. 690 00:33:45,247 --> 00:33:47,007 Woman screams. 691 00:33:57,528 --> 00:33:59,448 Baby cries. 692 00:34:08,648 --> 00:34:10,608 Yeah. Yeah, it was amazing. 693 00:34:11,928 --> 00:34:15,247 No, I didn't take a photo! It's someone else's baby! 694 00:34:15,248 --> 00:34:17,927 Yeah, I know, mum said the exact same thing. 695 00:34:17,928 --> 00:34:20,248 Actually, I'm not going to make it home this weekend, 696 00:34:20,249 --> 00:34:21,629 but, erm... 697 00:34:21,630 --> 00:34:23,008 She speaks hindi 698 00:34:23,009 --> 00:34:26,648 mm-hm. Yeah, erm, I love you, too. Ok. Bye. 699 00:34:26,649 --> 00:34:28,008 Bye. 700 00:34:28,009 --> 00:34:29,968 What the hell are you still doing here? 701 00:34:29,969 --> 00:34:32,568 Don't you have a depressing flat to go back to? 702 00:34:32,569 --> 00:34:34,848 The incident forms are longer than you think. 703 00:34:34,849 --> 00:34:36,488 Just go home. 704 00:34:36,489 --> 00:34:39,008 I'll do yours when I do mine. 705 00:34:39,009 --> 00:34:41,128 This is yours. Oh, no way! 706 00:34:41,129 --> 00:34:42,648 Alarm blares 707 00:34:42,649 --> 00:34:45,408 I wouldn't break a sweat. Non-reassuring-Tracey's on. 708 00:34:45,409 --> 00:34:47,248 The patient's probably farted. 709 00:34:47,249 --> 00:34:48,970 Woman screams 710 00:34:53,610 --> 00:34:55,409 25 weeks. First baby. 711 00:34:55,410 --> 00:34:58,249 Blood pressure's through the roof. 712 00:34:58,250 --> 00:34:59,690 She screams 713 00:34:59,691 --> 00:35:01,129 grade one caesarean section. 714 00:35:01,130 --> 00:35:02,969 Get anaesthetics round to theatres now. 715 00:35:02,970 --> 00:35:05,729 Tell paeds it's a 25-weeker with placental abruption. 716 00:35:05,730 --> 00:35:07,569 Severe pre-eclampsia. 717 00:35:07,570 --> 00:35:09,609 Turns out I probably shouldn't have sent her home. 718 00:35:09,610 --> 00:35:12,649 Erika, listen. I'm very worried about your baby. 719 00:35:12,650 --> 00:35:14,969 Placenta's coming away. I need to deliver you immediately 720 00:35:14,970 --> 00:35:16,769 to save baby's life. 721 00:35:16,770 --> 00:35:19,690 It's too early! I'm going to perform a caesarean section. 722 00:35:19,691 --> 00:35:20,871 Do you understand? 723 00:35:20,872 --> 00:35:22,051 She screams 724 00:35:25,011 --> 00:35:26,610 do you want your consultant in? 725 00:35:26,611 --> 00:35:28,371 I've got this, thanks, Tracy. 726 00:35:29,451 --> 00:35:32,410 Is my sister here? We've called her, and she'll be here in time 727 00:35:32,411 --> 00:35:34,930 to say hello to your baby. Or goodbye. 728 00:35:34,931 --> 00:35:38,730 Why don't you count down from 20 for me? 729 00:35:38,731 --> 00:35:41,250 20, 19... 18... 730 00:35:41,251 --> 00:35:42,851 Come on. 731 00:35:44,491 --> 00:35:46,770 Are you happy? Ready when you are. 732 00:35:46,771 --> 00:35:49,651 Adam, have you done a 25-week caesarean before? No. 733 00:35:49,652 --> 00:35:51,212 I've seen one. 734 00:36:03,452 --> 00:36:06,012 Pull. Quick. And retractor in. 735 00:36:53,454 --> 00:36:54,653 Adam? 736 00:36:54,654 --> 00:36:57,453 Yeah, chest movement. Adam? 737 00:36:57,454 --> 00:37:00,533 Adam! Er, sorry. Swabs, please. 738 00:37:00,534 --> 00:37:02,374 Let's start the suction. 739 00:37:09,454 --> 00:37:11,334 Oh, my god. 740 00:37:13,414 --> 00:37:15,414 Come on. Shit. 741 00:37:15,415 --> 00:37:18,214 Pressures aren't great here. What's the blood loss like? 742 00:37:18,215 --> 00:37:20,054 Er, it's a litre, a litre-and-a-half. 743 00:37:20,055 --> 00:37:22,174 Can you bleep the on-call haematologist? 744 00:37:22,175 --> 00:37:24,974 I'm going to need some more blood products. 745 00:37:24,975 --> 00:37:27,695 Find out who's the anaesthetic consultant. 746 00:37:28,895 --> 00:37:30,655 More swabs. 747 00:37:35,535 --> 00:37:37,934 I-I can't see anything. It's too thick to stitch. 748 00:37:37,935 --> 00:37:40,614 So much blood. Shit, I can't... 749 00:37:40,615 --> 00:37:42,454 I... I can't get it under... 750 00:37:42,455 --> 00:37:43,895 Fuck! 751 00:37:43,896 --> 00:37:47,055 This is insane. I can't... I can't see anything. Shit! 752 00:37:47,056 --> 00:37:48,655 Fuck! Adam... 753 00:37:48,656 --> 00:37:50,335 You can do this. 754 00:37:50,336 --> 00:37:51,896 I can't. I can't do this. 755 00:37:52,976 --> 00:37:55,535 This woman's going to die, and it's my fault. 756 00:37:55,536 --> 00:37:57,416 Shall we get mr Lockhart in? 757 00:38:01,696 --> 00:38:04,655 Yeah. Yeah, please. Tracy, will you call mr Lockhart 758 00:38:04,656 --> 00:38:06,175 and ask him to come in, please? 759 00:38:06,176 --> 00:38:09,256 I called him before you started. Why did you do that? I... 760 00:38:10,776 --> 00:38:12,256 Thank you. 761 00:38:47,458 --> 00:38:48,858 He retches. 762 00:39:01,978 --> 00:39:03,578 I'm really sorry. 763 00:39:10,178 --> 00:39:12,178 It was really busy, 764 00:39:12,179 --> 00:39:14,818 and I genuinely thought that she was crying wolf. 765 00:39:14,819 --> 00:39:17,898 She was crying severe early-onset pre-eclampsia, 766 00:39:17,899 --> 00:39:21,618 which you'd have known if you'd done so much as a blood test. 767 00:39:21,619 --> 00:39:24,218 And then, for some reason, you attempted an operation 768 00:39:24,219 --> 00:39:26,259 any consultant would struggle with. 769 00:39:27,739 --> 00:39:30,218 Oh, you can buy Tracy a box of chocolates, by the way, 770 00:39:30,219 --> 00:39:31,859 for calling me in. 771 00:39:35,059 --> 00:39:37,459 Can I just say...? No! 772 00:39:40,020 --> 00:39:45,300 Amend your entry from when you first saw this patient this afternoon. 773 00:39:47,140 --> 00:39:49,419 Write that you discussed with me over the phone, 774 00:39:49,420 --> 00:39:52,499 and that I advised you to send her home. 775 00:39:52,500 --> 00:39:54,419 What? 776 00:39:54,420 --> 00:39:56,579 No, you don't have to do that. 777 00:39:56,580 --> 00:39:58,660 Well, you didn't have to come in tonight. 778 00:40:01,380 --> 00:40:02,900 I did. Yeah, you did. 779 00:40:16,341 --> 00:40:18,820 Hi. Um... 780 00:40:18,821 --> 00:40:20,701 Something to keep you going. 781 00:40:53,222 --> 00:40:55,062 Slam. 782 00:41:06,022 --> 00:41:08,503 Phone buzzes. 783 00:41:52,544 --> 00:41:56,384 Hi. I'm one of the obstetric, erm, registrars. 784 00:41:57,344 --> 00:41:59,663 Are you lost? 785 00:41:59,664 --> 00:42:01,703 Erm, I'm looking for... 786 00:42:01,704 --> 00:42:03,743 Baby Van hegan. The 25-weeker. 787 00:42:03,744 --> 00:42:06,625 Ah! Are you the one who, er...? 788 00:42:10,265 --> 00:42:13,305 Well, you're not going to knock over the Incubator, are you? 789 00:42:14,625 --> 00:42:15,985 Bed 5. 790 00:42:44,586 --> 00:42:46,225 I'm really sorry. 791 00:42:46,226 --> 00:42:50,146 I was... Really tired, and I just wanted to get home. 792 00:42:51,946 --> 00:42:54,586 And... this place is insane. 793 00:42:55,946 --> 00:42:57,745 And... 794 00:42:57,746 --> 00:42:59,265 I fucked up. 795 00:42:59,266 --> 00:43:01,465 I mucked up. 796 00:43:01,466 --> 00:43:03,745 Sorry. 797 00:43:03,746 --> 00:43:05,507 I tried my best. 798 00:43:09,187 --> 00:43:12,107 Just promise me you'll have a normal head scan. 799 00:43:30,947 --> 00:43:33,068 Enjoy your last night of pussy. 800 00:44:02,869 --> 00:44:05,909 ♪ I've been workin', baby 801 00:44:08,189 --> 00:44:10,229 ♪ for too long now 802 00:44:11,509 --> 00:44:15,309 ♪ just wanna get next to you, boy 803 00:44:17,149 --> 00:44:20,309 ♪ I've been searchin', baby 804 00:44:21,669 --> 00:44:24,629 ♪ a way to tell you how 805 00:44:26,309 --> 00:44:29,709 ♪ gotta get through to you, boy 806 00:44:31,630 --> 00:44:35,589 ♪ never said it was sunshine 807 00:44:35,590 --> 00:44:38,669 ♪ but you took it all of the time 808 00:44:38,670 --> 00:44:42,669 ♪ never said it was sunshine 809 00:44:42,670 --> 00:44:45,630 ♪ but you took it all of the time 810 00:44:47,470 --> 00:44:49,510 ♪ all of the time 811 00:44:51,190 --> 00:44:53,670 ♪ all of the time 812 00:44:54,670 --> 00:44:56,989 ♪ all of the time 813 00:44:56,990 --> 00:44:59,550 ♪ you took it all of the time 814 00:45:15,231 --> 00:45:18,950 ♪ there's no escaping now 815 00:45:18,951 --> 00:45:21,991 ♪ let me show you how 816 00:45:23,391 --> 00:45:27,031 ♪ what it feels to be true 817 00:45:57,632 --> 00:46:00,593 ♪ I've been workin', baby 818 00:46:02,833 --> 00:46:04,873 ♪ for too long now 819 00:46:06,113 --> 00:46:09,753 ♪ just wanna get next to you, boy 820 00:46:11,913 --> 00:46:14,873 ♪ I've been searchin', baby 821 00:46:16,113 --> 00:46:18,833 ♪ a way to tell you how 822 00:46:20,393 --> 00:46:24,393 ♪ gotta get through to you, boy. ♪ 57662

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.