Original subtitles

I don't know how to love

but learned how to hate.

If I could start all over,

would I do the same thing?

♪ Do you want me ♪

♪ You gotta have me ♪

♪ Do you think you're ready for me ♪

♪ Oh ♪

♪ Do you think you can handle this ♪

♪ Like a vandalist ♪

♪ Break me off and dismantle this ♪

♪ I'm a lights-on type ♪

♪ Not a candle mist ♪

♪ Don't want no romance ♪

♪ Straight strangle this ♪

♪ Murder and mangle this ♪

♪ Can you handle this ♪

♪ I'm a freak I could put you in an ambulance ♪

♪ Are you the man for this ♪

♪ Can you handle this ♪

♪ 'Cause I don't need you ♪

♪ it ♪

♪ In my eyes ♪

♪ Every time that I see ya ♪

♪ What what ♪

♪ I'd like to see ya ♪

♪ You're the secret to my private life ♪

♪ What can I do just to feel ya ♪

♪ What what ♪

♪ I wanna feel ya ♪

♪ Yeah yeah ♪

♪ You're playin' hard to get ♪

♪ And it's hard for me to manage ♪

♪ 'Cause you best believe ♪

♪ You got what I need ♪

♪ You're playin' hard to get ♪

♪ And I feel like such a savage ♪

♪ Until you're with me ♪

♪ It's like I can't breathe ♪

♪ Watchin' me lay down in a soaked ♪

♪ Waiting on your lovin' ♪

♪ Calling out that piece ♪

♪ Hyperventilating feeling for that touch ♪

♪ Slowly sliding in me grippin' on that clutch ♪

♪ I don't know about you ♪

♪ All the things I'm planning if you only knew ♪

♪ Careful what you ax for ♪

♪ I'm so addictive ♪

♪ Have 'til sore ♪

♪ Kitty cat so tight ♪

♪ How you ♪

♪ roar ♪

♪ My sexual side's hardcore ♪

♪ I promise when I'm finished ♪

♪ You'll be feelin' like a whore ♪

♪ Bop, spray, smash on the floor ♪

♪ Leaving you confused ♪

♪ Your heart and mind will be at war ♪

♪ Not like you had before ♪

♪ What's the ♪

♪ I more ♪

♪ In my eyes ♪

♪ Every time that I see ya ♪

♪ I'd like to see ya ♪

♪ You're the secret to my private life ♪

♪ What can I do just to feel ya ♪

♪ I want to feel ya ♪

♪ You're playin' hard to get ♪

♪ And it's hard for me to manage ♪

♪ 'Cause you best believe ♪

- All I need from you right now is $500.

$500 that you spend on your fucking shoes.

♪ And it's hard for me to manage ♪

♪ 'Cause you best believe ♪

♪ You got what I need ♪

♪ You're playin' hard to get ♪

♪ And I feel like such savage ♪

♪ Until you're with me ♪

♪ It's like I can't breathe ♪

♪ I know you want it, get on it ♪

♪ Actin' like you own it ♪

♪ Get you flabbergasted ♪

♪ By the way that I was flowin' it ♪

♪ I'm not conceited ♪

♪ Someone that you needed ♪

♪ My touch so exquisite ♪

♪ Bitches who deny it who have to ad-lib it ♪

- You wanna sit here and you wanna talk about

getting a relationship wit me,

but you can't help me.

So how am I gonna be able to trust you in a relationship

if you can't help me outside of a relationship?

Are you a hustler? - Well I hope so.

So go to the corner store and go get us a sandwich,

something to drink in the Dutch.

Tell him you'll pay him back tomorrow.

Go you a hustler, are you?

- That'll never work. - It will work, just do it.

- So this is the ID you're gonna use to get into the club.

- This barely looks like me.

It's not a crime.

What is it gonna do?

Mr Officer, I just got robbed by a 16 year old

that I tried having sex for money with.

There's so many nasty, perverted

old men out there. - The way you explained it

made it seem way more easy.

This shit is complicated.

I'm not-- - No it's really easy.

It's just you're so ditsy, you're making it complicated.

This how it's gonna go down:

you're gonna take him to the bathroom.

You're gonna start feelin' him up, right?

Get him all excited thinkin' that he's about to fuck you.

- For real man, I saw you at that bar.

I knew you was gonna come up to .

Now take that jacket off, c'mere.

Take that off, c'mere. - It's good.

- Take that off, come on man.

Whassup?

I got the money here.

I ain't gonna bring you up here with no money.

I got your money right here.

Relax, relax, relax, relax, relax.

Here's your money, take your money.

You ain't goin' nowhere.

You alright?

That's what's up.

C'mere.

Yo, what the fuck is up wit you, you faggot?

What's wrong wit you?

What's up, what's up?

Chill.

Wrong wit you?

- Smells clean.

You're confused.

You wanna smell like a boy,

but you wanna look like a girl.

Chinese food is fine.

- Alright, I'm gonna step out.

I'm gonna get some food.

Hey, .

Listen, I'm sorry I couldn't call you.

I don't know the number for the hotel room.

Yeah right, you're lying.

- You're fucking lying.

You did know the hotel number.

- No, I don't know the hotel number.

I thought this was your friend.

- It is my friend.

On top of that, you stole $100 of mine.

You're lucky I didn't take the full $200

and just disappear on your ass and never come back.

'Cause I could've easily done that.

Yo Ekaj, pick up the phone.

Pick up the fuckin' phone.

Yo, you think you a hustler.

You ain't a hustler.

New York will eat you the fuck up.

You know where to find me.

- Look at me.

Look at me in my face and tell me.

I said look at me.

You in the fuckin' streets suckin' fuckin' dick.

Can't even fuckin' look at you.

You think I'm gonna let my son,

my son walkin' around the streets in our neighborhood

where everybody can see you

lookin' like a fuckin' maricon with tight clothes on?

Your eyes painted like a little bitch?

You think I'm...

I will fuckin' kill you first.

Yo bud you're not a hustler, B.

You think you a hustler, but you not a hustler.

Lemme tell you somethin',

everybody in New York is a hustler.

Even the grandmothers on the street

make more money than you.

- You dropped your cigarette.

- Thank you.

- I have half, 1 1/2.

- Yeah.

What's your name?

- I'm Chris. - Mecca, nice to meet you.

- Nice to meet you.

Earth? - Yeah.

Jersey, Earth.

- Yeah, sorry about that man.

- That's okay, I am too.

- I'm waiting for a friend.

We've all got friends.

Friends are good.

I'll be your friend. - Thank you.

- You're pretty. - Thank you.

So I've been told. - Yeah.

Don't believe anything anybody tells you.

- Exactly. - They're all full of shit.

Man look, it's a tiger.

It's good luck.

It's a gift for the cigarette.

- Thank you. - You're welcome.

You hungry?

I know a fat guy we can go hang out with.

He got food and coke, a bunch of stuff.

Wanna go chill?

- Okay.

You got money on you?

I mean we can walk if you want.

It's not that far.

You down?

Grab your shit, let's go.

Yo, he's not answering the door.

He usually answers, so I don't know what the fuck.

Gimme your phone.

I'm gonna call him.

Cold?

I'm outside, you supposed to be home.

Do me a favor, give me a call back.

Not answering.

Smile and laugh. - That would be great.

- Be happy.

What's wrong?

- I'm cold, bitch.

- My molars are gone at the top

and I got in a fight .

But you .

Got no teeth.

Bitch, how bad are drugs?

You lose your teeth.

Not really.

- Fuckin' shit.

Yeah, you tell me that shit all the time.

Come on, throw me the keys.

Then buzz me in.

- Go!

Yo, I'm tryin' to get this bike fixed.

- I robbed this shit, yo.

- Yeah.

- I'm sayin' though, what you tryin' to get out of it?

- I don't know.

Let's see

50.

- You bullshittin' me.

Come on, yo.

Look at this, it weighs nothing.

- Come on, lemme see that.

Hold up.

- You're not gonna steal this shit from me too, son?

Come on. - Damn, son.

- It weighs nothing, it's a white people bike.

- Alright, 75.

- Come on, yo. - Come on, man.

Come on now.

- 100 man, 85 the most doggy.

- It's a recession, I'm getting ready.

- I know it's a recession.

What do you think I'm tryna do, man?

- Whatever yo, gimme whatever you got then.

- It's all good, dog. - Yo, fuck it.

Come on, whatever.

I'll take whatever you got.

I just need to eat man, whatever.

Gimme that shit, yo.

Come on, be safe.

- That room is fucking 300 and above.

I left the fuckin' room.

- That's it and I wasn't doing much.

So I left the room and I was fucking...

I was so grossed out with myself.

It was my first time.

I care.

You back in these...

You in our base.

Fucking dick for $60, $20.

I'm just like that's gross, charge 'em 300.

- Right, for $5. - Yeah.

But that's the thing.

I see it now and I'm so grossed.

I almost did it once and I got 300

after dealing with that.

If I'm gonna sell myself,

I have to have a sexual connection.

Not a sexual connection, I have a sexual mental connection.

If you're mentally fuckin' right in your head,

bro I will get the hardest fucking dick ever

and I'm not fuckin' big.

I'm probably below five inches, but if you're fucking--

Most men are six inches, actually.

- I'm below five inches.

Have you seen nine inches?

Have you ever seen nine inches?

- Yes.

'Cause I've got one in my bookbag.

Have you ever seen nine inches?

It's about this big. - I've seen dicks this big.

- No but nine inches is actually this big.

- No six inches is this big. - This big, this big.

Six inches, most guys have a six inch dick.

Most guys will tell you on item for item

or whatever site you're on that their dick is nine inches.

Everybody wants to have a nine inch dick

'cause it just looks like a good number to say

you have a dick-- - Fuck the weed.

I was just like fuck weed.

I'm tryin' to fuckin' snort some.

When I was doing coke, E, fucking K.

I was smoking meth, I was doing a lot of that.

What was your use for doing it?

Was it to killing yourself?

Mine was to overdose.

- There's no use for doing drugs ever.

- But my use was for doing drugs was to kill myself.

I fuckin' would overdose everyday.

You know what Triple Cs are?

Do you know what Triple Cs are?

- I don't know but-- - Triple Cs.

- You can talk to me or a doctor.

- No it's not therapy.

I was so glad I'm done with this.

But Triple Cs is a drug where it's Coricidin.

Coricidin on the purple box.

You used to fuckin' take like 16 pills, eight pills.

You're gonna be like...

It's like fuckin' K, it's like Ecstasy.

It's like fuckin' acid all in one time.

It was so hardcore.

No, exactly.

- Yeah.

That's a reminder

of how stupid

I fucking

am.

I got a track mark.

I never in my fucking life

wanted to have one of these things.

It's my laugh button.

Every time my father would get pissed off or mad at me,

I would go brrr and push it.

Tell him you don't got a place to stay.

You know what, we could be like vampires.

We'll just keep our asses up all night

and we could sleep all fucking day at my cousin's house.

- There's no Percocet after an hour.

- After an hour we'll be fine.

It's not that long.

You'd be fine.

That's a dick.

my favorite artist.

I can't remember his fucking name right now.

Egon Schiele.

Egon Schiele is my favorite.

Egon Schiele would paint heroin addicts,

male prostitutes in the 1920s, 1910.

If you look...

I'll show you.

- Oh wow, you have balls.

- We would paint heroin addicts, prostitutes.

Hence Egon Schiele.

That's my dick.

Oh wow.

That's cool.

- Definitely. - Sexy, sexy.

I can't even see your face because my sunglasses are on,

but I see your little furry, white man legs.

You fuckin' crawl down from the mountain

to the devil.

You're coming from the gym?

I know what you do in the gym.

For what?

It's because his after hours are fucked up.

There's sleeping and they're sitting in the corner.

Goin' up in their pockets and take their shit.

- No, they just got money.

Fuck their virginity.

Fuckin' virginity ain't gonna buy you a cheeseburger.

I gotta work.

Plan's working.

How many of these did I get?

Money, but I got

this bag of shit.

See, we could do like this much

and fucking sell this shit.

Ekaj, wake up.

Wake up.

- Yo wake up, my cousin's comin' back in an hour.

I'm dressed already.

- 'Cause you needed sleep.

I'll take you somewhere else, come on.

I'll make you coffee, alright?

You want a coffee?

Want some meth?

I just wanna punch him in his face

and have sex with him.

Instead of, I want the man to feel like he's in charge.

But what I wanna do is let him think he's in charge.

Let him think he has the power

and then just take it from him.

So after having sex, just be like

this was probably a really good day for you,

but thanks for fucking up mine and just walk away.

- Yeah, everything's going good.

Oh, I've just been really busy.

I think I would give up my career for him

and I don't even have one.

So how long are you in town for?

Fuck that whole ceremony.

We'll both give each other rings.

I'm gonna change my last name.

He's gonna change his last name to something we make up.

Yeah.

Yeah no, we had a good time.

Okay.

Yeah, let's hang out.

You should leave 'em here.

That way you have something nice to wear

when we go out next time.

Actually I have a dinner to get to.

But I'll call you this weekend, okay?

- I wonder why he didn't invite me to meet his friend.

Is this another game?

Men are very insecure.

I'll always hate men.

I even hate myself because I have that man mentality.

Do you have a cigarette?

Fuck you.

♪ I'll ♪

♪ Oh ♪

♪ You don't know how I feel ♪

- I just got out of the hospital.

I got all your messages.

I don't know why the fuck you're buggin' out, man.

I'm headed home now.

I don't know where you're at and I hope you're okay.

Just give me a call back, alright?

- Jesus Christ, answer.

I was under the impression that

if your boyfriend acted like a psycho,

it meant that he loved you so much

that he loses his sanity.

I guess it's that crazy Puerto Rican love.

Where'd you get this?

I told you--

That's what I saw when I was growing up.

You little shit.

- That's what I knew.

When I told you, he was on the phone.

He kept listening.

I kept trying to run away.

Bro, he kept...

Every time I'm in his house,

I don't like talking on the phone for a reason.

Yeah, what do you think I was telling you?

He trapped me in his house, bro.

I couldn't leave and every time I did leave,

he fucking played some sick game with me.

I'm not dumb with this, I know what he was doing.

- Get the fuck inside.

You have my shades.

- No!

- Fine, I won't fuck your mouth.

Here's some sheets, I'm gonna go to bed yo.

- Thanks, Mecca.

- Fuck you.

I've seen your bruises already

'cause I take those fucking glasses off.

You know what?

You should put makeup on the other eye

'cause it matches.

- I need these two tubes of paint.

I think it's gonna close soon.

Stop!

Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop.

- I don't.

Feet stinks.

You're gonna fall.

You're gonna fall over.

- That's right.

- You're sad, sad.

your boyfriend this time.

What's he look like?

How big's the dick in you?

Does he have a big dick?

It's the only excuse for putting up with that shit

if he's got a big dick.

- Hey.

- I'm great.

- Check out my new piece.

- Fuck, this shit is heavy.

I can barely lift it.

Thanks for letting me stay here by the way.

- No problem.

- Just one.

- If you stay another day.

- Nah.

- I'll burn it.

What size is it?

- I was working on them yesterday.

These are cool.

They're the G star.

I really fucked that ass.

- I can wear them high waisted.

So what else do you keep adding on to these?

- Just everything and then I think

I'm gonna paint them white.

- They already are white.

- Well, whiter, I want them to be really white.

- No, you can wash them.

- No.

So who gave you your haircut?

- I did.

I love it.

It's amazing.

- Thank you.

Everyone keeps telling me that.

I'm thinking it looks like shit.

- It's a little too long though.

- No it's not.

- Yeah, from behind you look like a girl.

I don't want them thinking or something if we're

goin' down town together or shit and we're going

to party tonight.

- You don't want me looking like a hipster?

- No I want a hipster digging that, you know.

- Yeah.

- It always happens.

Like everyday for you?

- Yeah.

- Must be hard for you.

- No, I got used to it by now.

- Such a pretty fact, how do you...

- Ha, thank you.

- I smoke the Devil's lettuce.

- If I'm getting your gist, I think I have, I'm not sure.

- PCP, Angel dust.

- No thank you, I'll pass.

- Ummm okay.

- I have a couple so I think we're good.

- We can make some more though, real quick.

- Right over here.

♪ Where did you learn to play the part ♪

♪ Should have shut you down from the start ♪

♪ I knew I'd be the one to fall victim to ♪

♪ I'm in the arms of someone new ♪

♪ She would die if she knew I was here with you ♪

♪ But you got a way to make it all seem right ♪

♪ to get me high ♪

shit like that?

Girls do stupid shit like that.

Wanna get Samantha?

Like a girl?

That's not you .

- Gimme one. - No.

'Cause when I wanna give you one, I'll give you one.

Not when you tell me to give you one.

I don't work like that.

- Wow, you got two painter boyfriends.

Not just one, you got two of 'em.

So if one doesn't work out,

the other one will fuckin' pay for all your bullshit.

You should ask them both to teach you how to paint

so you'll get a career out of it.

It'd be really funny, could paint pictures of me.

♪ She wants his love ♪

♪ She wants destruction ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

♪ She wants his love ♪

♪ She wants his love ♪

- I was gonna chill out with you

until like two or three in the morning

and then go home .

I'm leaving outside right now.

♪ She wants his love ♪

- I see you walkin' and I see your fucking mannerisms.

I wasn't even listening.

That's only one time I hurt you.

One time had the .

Hmm?

♪ She wants his love ♪

♪ She wants destruction ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

♪ She wants his love ♪

- You were supposed to be here two hours ago.

I'm real tired.

Who's that?

Ask your boy Ekiji

if he's hungry. - His name is Ekaj.

'Cause I'll cook something up if you want something.

Ekiji, are you hungry?

- No, he's fine.

He a little tired, but yeah.

Aren't you gonna tell me my fortune?

- No, that's okay.

- If you're gonna touch anybody, touch me.

- No, that's okay, he's mine.

- Do me a favor, chill the fuck out.

- This Ekiji's mine.

How much for him?

$200?

- You couldn't afford it.

Why don't you come closer to me my little Kooka?

Just what the doctor ordered, huh?

Go ahead, do a bong.

Nah, he's just my type.

This is my type.

- I'll be okay.

Yeah, I'm okay.

Yeah?

♪ You wanna fuck around ♪

♪ you gonna lay around ♪

♪ When you see me comin' ♪

♪ Imma lay you down ♪

- Hey yo, come and get somethin' to eat man.

I just finished cooking.

You gotta eat something. - Leave me alone.

Ekaj come on, yo.

Get over it, it happens to everybody.

Everybody gets raped.

Shit is whacked.

It happened.

I can't console you if you're in the bathroom

thinking about what happened.

Look, everybody gets raped yo.

I got raped, my mother got fucking raped by my father

that's why I'm sitting here.

I got raped twice like am idiot.

My boyfriend got raped by my friends.

My tranny friends get raped and killed.

Like everybody got raped, it happened.

It means, you know what?

Only ugly people don't get raped.

You're not ain't ugly no more.

Come on, you're pretty.

- I don't why I didn't fight.

I wanted it to be over when it happened to me.

I wanted it to be done with.

Maybe it's the same shit.

Let's just get the fuck out of there and have it done with.

It happened, it's part of your past.

Want me to go kill him for you?

You're too young to know what news is.

It comes back.

- It's s'til like, this isn't me.

- It's coming back right now, you're talking about it.

- If I was to show you my artwork, you'd be like damn bitch.

If I was to show you something now, you'd be like

what are you doing?

- I hear that, you don't have to tell me that.

- You need inspiration.

You as an artist, like tattoos on your face,

it's inspiration.

- Well then I should inspire you to finally do something.

- Exactly.

- You don't sound like somebody

whose completely disenchanted.

You don't sound like somebody whose lost.

- Because there's hope.

- Then as long as you've got hope, you're fucking fine.

- I can only hope for so much.

- When you stop, when you have no hope

you become a fucking whore.

Then you can be fucking depressed about it

and be crying and upset about it.

If you're crying about it and you're upset about it

and you're fine now.

If you keep hanging out with this one

and that one and getting high

he's gonna kill any fucking emotion you have in you

and you're not gonna wanna do nothing.

One day you're gonna say I used to draw

and you're not gonna be bothered about it.

When I ask you did you enjoy your life

you're gonna be mmmm.

You're not gonna fucking care.

If you're crying about it, you're gonna keep crying about it

and you should be upset about it.

You should light a fire under your own feet.

And you should be upset and if you're not upset

and you're not bored with what you're doing

and you're not moving forward, then stop.

And be a fucking whore.

My friend about six years ago

told me to tattoo my face and I said why?

He said "Put yourself in a corner

"where you can't get a job doing anything else."

I can't get a job flipping fucking burgers

but if you do that to yourself, then you take

what you want .

So I did it.

It's the best fucking thing I ever did with my life.

Hey yo pick the fuck up next time I call you.

I got my check in the mail.

We're gonna get some Puerto Rican food.

I wanted you to come by.

I'll see you in a minute, yo.

Peace.

Can I come over tonight?

Did you get my paints?

Is that what you're worried about?

Is fucking paint?

I asked you to do one simple thing for me

and get those paints.

- You fucking playing games, like yo, shut the fuck up.

- She knew how to smack his glasses off.

- He was a nerd in high school, shut the fuck up.

He got so mad, I was crying. - He was like cray-zee!

- Fuck up!

You tryna slap minds with you.

That's your boy.

- That's your man, dog.

- Man I'm negative in my account, dog.

- You got the overdrive fee.

- You're overfucked.

- Big dog.

- Grab his feet.

- I got his legs.

- Grab the bag man!

- Let's go, let's go, let's go!

- I didn't say you could come in.

Where are you going?

- I need money for a room.

- You're lucky I don't give you a matching eye.

- Then at least can you give me my clothes?

I bought those clothes.

Those aren't your clothes.

♪ You wanna fuck around ♪

♪ You're gonna lay around ♪

♪ You see me comin' ♪

♪ I'm gonna lay you down ♪

♪ Fuck them like a hard rock ♪

♪ Raised in the streets until my heart stops ♪

♪ I pulled your beef hunting me down ♪

♪ Shoving me down no mercy ♪

♪ Gunning it down like we gotta play dirty ♪

♪ Living proof of our pretty youth ♪

♪ Facing the truth ♪

♪ Raising hell 'til I raise the roof ♪

♪ Putting street knowledge to use ♪

♪ Get in my way I'm gonna lay you ♪

♪ In the last minute soup ♪

♪ Hands tight as a noose ♪

♪ Won't choke under pressure ♪

♪ Better wish that I never catch ya ♪

♪ Call your bluff test ya see if you lie ♪

♪ Think you're tough I'm impressed ♪

♪ When I see you survive ♪

- Come on get up, I got you food.

What is this?

What does it look like?

- What, you're skipping your appointment

'cause you're fucking drinking?

No I'm skipping my appointment

because I'm not going.

- What happened to decorating your fucking apartment?

What is this?

- This is my apartment and I'm staying here.

I can't hear you with that shirt on.

♪ I can't hear you with that shirt on ♪

You don't need that.

Where the fucks your meds?

Take your meds.

You're crazy--

You can't even get off the fucking couch right now.

- I'm on medication. - Look at you.

You're mumbling.

Your meds are right here.

- Not those.

The fucking white bottle.

- Hey come on, yo.

Hey guys!

Chris, whatever your name is.

Me?

I'm Puerto Rican, I'm from the Bronx.

speak Spanish.

Here, read this.

- We got it.

- Oww.

- I'm fucking decorating that shit black.

I'm adding my black cock.

- You're Puerto Rican, think about it's brown.

- No.

- Dare wear black.

Like tan, the champagne color, I'm black.

- What are you going to do to your apartment?

- The apartment is not have you in it if you keep asking.

- Just be happy because you could be living right there.

Like that dove, you could be that dove.

It's like 175.

I got that

to cover the rest of the month.

Got my EBT, I could chill.

I could flip the rest of that.

We're good.

I got room for you.

You could chill on my couch.

You don't even have a couch.

- I'll get a couch, I'll mop a fucking couch

it's no big deal.

- This nigga right here, you got a couch for me, sir?

Your good at sucking dick right?

I heard.

- I haven't seen you.

Oh, I'm sorry.

Look now I gotta shower.

You can't paint it black.

- You fuckin' smell. - I need a shower.

You do!

- You need a fuckin' golden shower.

Got any money on you?

- I only have three bucks.

Wanna hop a cab?

There's one right there.

- I'll take a run.

- Fuck it.

- Nah, come on, let's go.

- No not at all.

Do you have a problem peeing?

You have your

prostate swollen. - No.

- That means there's something wrong with your butt.

Feeling dizzy.

- Come on lean on me.

I said lean on me, don't choke me.

- We have no money, we're trying to get back home.

I'll suck your dick for a ride.

He can.

He's got a pussy, you want it?

What's up?

- Here sit down.

Are you okay?

- No, I have AIDS.

- No, I have nobody to call.

You got anybody you want me to call?

- No. - Exactly.

- He fucking loves me.

Like I fucking ruined his life.

Oh my God, I fucking ruined it.

I could have went to jail.

It's so bad, like I fucking feel so bad for him.

Like, story of my life, that's the only guy that loved me.

He loves me more than my mom.

It's okay, I got the Hood award.

I have the Hector or the Jose

- You're not talking me out.

I fucking love this guy.

You have no idea what it is to feel loved.

- I'm not supposed to be getting the fuck out of bed.

but you go alone so...

You fucking idiot, I mean.

- No wait.

Dude you need rest.

- Listen, you need rest right now.

Umm, do me a favor.

Stay here tonight, for me.

At least stay the night tonight and think about it

when you're not crying and then you go

and speak to him tomorrow.

Everything will be fine.

You're not in a place to go meet

somebody tonight for a talk about anything.

I'm sick.

I can't be alone tonight.

Do me the fucking favor and stay the night, please.

Is that the computer you stole from the hospital?

- I'm gonna take you back to the hospital to get me one.

Share.

- I'll get you some AIDS while you're there

and some bedbugs and some pineapple jello.

♪ Made the plans for me to change ♪

♪ Misdemeanor lady ♪

♪ If you knew what you do ♪

♪ Now I'm sharin' a ♪

♪ For all the wicked things I did ♪

♪ And baby it's all because of you ♪

♪ Murdered a petition ♪

♪ Get your fame ♪

♪ Got me locked out ♪

♪ Don't know what to do ♪

♪ I guess I'm stuck with you ♪

♪ 'Cause you're my woman ♪

♪ Somebody tell me what to say ♪

♪ When these allegations get thrown my way ♪

♪ People are talkin' this and that ♪

♪ Girl is suspicious and I can't go back ♪

♪ I thought everything would be alright ♪

Aww thank you.

Which picture?

Oh you mean the one with my ass?

I knew you would like that.

So, I don't even know you.

What do you mean, what's my real name?

Wait, hold on, my father's calling me.

Let me call you right back.

Hey cuz, on your way home, could you do me a favor

and buy some milk?

Oh yeah and we ain't got no eggs either.

- Fuck.

- Hello!

Junkie!

Crackhead.

What are you doing?

I know what you're doing.

Why are you quiet?

Cuz!

- I don't have a problem.

You do.

- I'm sick.

I'm dying.

You don't worry about what the fuck I do.

You have your whole life to ruin.

I've already ruined mine.

You know what?

Keep that fucking food you bought.

I don't wanna eat that shit.

I want nothing to do with your whore money

and anything that comes from it 'cause you are what you eat.

- And how is stealing better than escorting?

- 'Cause stealing takes skills and escorting

takes it up the ass.

I know he's jealous 'cause I'm making money.

I'm not a drug addict.

I do coke, ecstasy and drink.

I don't consider those hard core drugs.

- Hey Jake what's up, I keep getting your voicemail.

I'm sitting at home, doing your fucking laundry.

You probably stink.

I haven't heard from you.

I don't know where the fuck you are.

If you don't come pick up your laundry

I'm gonna go sell this shit at the Goodwill

so gimme a call back, goodbye.

They don't want me for me.

They just want me to complete their fantasies.

It's a game you have to be high for.

All I know how to do is run for the money.

And I'm not even sure if I'm running for the money.

Just running away from life.

- It's more honest than going sucking dick for money.

You're gonna get old.

Meet some 27 year old little crack addicted

blowing white guys from New Jersey for $100, $300.

You can make that shit in two seconds.

Be a fashion whore, don't be a fuckin'...

You know, do what you want man.

Wanna be a whore when you're 27?

You wanna be a fucking whore?

Is that what you want?

You wanna be a fucking whore?

Suck my dick, come get some AIDS.

It's the new flavor AIDS.

You're sick.

- Yeah!

I'm dove sick, you know that?

You didn't get the memo?

- I didn't mean literally. - I am literally.

I haven't told you this before 'cause you're stupid

and you might get the wrong idea but you're cute.

Thank you, I know.

- The thing is sometime I like you 'cause you do know.

But I mean, I would have fucked you real good

if I met you a long time ago.

You're cute but you can't handle me.

- You never told me this.

What's it gonna do for anybody?

I wouldn't touch you.

I'm never gonna touch you.

I'm not gonna get you sick even if it's one chance

in the world I could get you sick,

I'm not gonna get you sick.

I would never touch you.

You touched me here.

You touched my heart.

I mean like, I won't touch you.

You're cute though.

After I die, for find another me.

I'm sure there's one out there.

- I don't think I want to.

- That's even more flattering.

- Hey Mecca, I'm gonna go get a water, you want something?

- A napkin, yeah.

- Alright I'll be right back.

Johnny?

Hey Johnny, it's Ekaj.

I've been trying to call you

and yeah, call me back.

Come on, it's getting cold.

Come on, get up.

Mecca, don't fucking do this to me now.

Come on, wake up!

Come on Mecca, we're gonna go out.

Come on, we're gonna go.

Just wake up for me.

Come on it's not your time yet.

It's not your time.

- Oh man you must be cheating man!

No, do over, look you cheated!

Come on, let's play one more time, please.

One more time.

No, you cheated man.

Do over, do over, come on.

Told you I would beat you.

Daddy's the best, daddy's the best.

♪ I once lived in the darkest place ♪

♪ Long time ago where my memories still remain ♪

♪ Summer in my soul ♪

♪ I don't know where I'm running ♪

♪ I think I lose myself unknowing ♪

♪ Somebody help me ♪

♪ 'cause I'm trying not to lose my head ♪

♪ Ooh Lord ♪

♪ Knows ♪

♪ And lord knows how hard I tried ♪

♪ And tried to keep my mind on the positive ♪

♪ But it seems that the black has finally ♪

♪ Taken me over ♪

♪ And Lord knows how hard I try ♪

♪ I try to keep my mind on the positive ♪

♪ But it seems that the black has finally ♪

♪ Taken me over ♪

♪ And I seen so many of my people die ♪

♪ And I just can't depend on my relatives ♪

♪ But it seems that the black has finally ♪

♪ Taken me over ♪

Was that an answer?

Was that your boyfriend? - Yeah.

- Why do you let him talk to you like that?

- Used to it.

- Sound like a fucking pussy.

Shouldn't let nobody talk to you that way man.

I think about it now and then

and I'm just was it worth it?

Was all that drama worth it?

I miss him.

A lot.

It was like an insect.

Not even an insect, he was like a parasite

deteriorating my whole body.

Making me into a zombie.

But he made me.

He cheated me, he broke me.

Made me look like a fool.

- You know I could deal with anything.

I could deal with a crack head for a son.

I could deal with a dope fiend,

but I just can't deal with

a homo for a fucking son.

I don't know if I should quit drugs entirely.

But I should definitely cut back.

Who in this world can do life completely straight?

Gimme a break.

And if they are straight, their even more fucked up.

People don't understand the bad times you go through

only make you stronger.

It can create a different person.

But it definitely makes you stronger.

I would never, ever, ever

want to go back to the person I was.

♪ I once lived in the darkest place ♪

♪ A long time ago where my memories they still remain ♪

- But I'm not sick.

- I'll give you AIDS in your fucking coffee.

- I don't drink coffee, asshole.

- Well I'll give you AIDS in the air.

- I see you won the porn act.

- Whatever.

What, when you have Times Square and my pictures

on the corner again?

- No.

and I look across the street

and I was smoking crack on the corner

while my pictures there, that's how fab I am.

And then you hear, sailor, hi!

Hey!

Hi!

He said no thank you.

Fuck him, fuck you.

He's not a real sailor.

♪ You just gotta hold on ♪

♪ 'Cause you'll get out somehow ♪

♪ Just keep holding on ♪

♪ Don't you cry out ♪

♪ They can see you ♪

♪ I know you're trying your hardest ♪

♪ To hide away, don't you hide from me ♪

♪ 'cause I know your tears 'cause I showed them any longer ♪

♪ Kissed me when I was little ♪

♪ I had to face a great pain ♪

♪ That I couldn't handle ♪

♪ But I kept my faith held high ♪

♪ To the great man in the sky ♪

♪ Nothin' can hold us back no ♪

, he was so mad.

And he was like ain't you gonna take my butt?

I was like yeah, course I am.

That's what you came for right?

So I'll give you and take it.

You're not .

♪ Oh ♪

♪ I'm the one who's actually there ♪

♪ So don't let life bring you down ♪

♪ You just gotta hold on ♪

♪ 'Cause you'll get out somehow ♪

♪ Just keep holdin' on ♪

♪ Just hold on ♪

♪ Just stay strong ♪

♪ It'll be over soon ♪

♪ It'll be over soon ♪